Original subtitles

[SCHOOL BELL RINGING]

[PLAYING CHORDS]

♪ I think it sucks so much ♪

Why did I agree to do this stupid talent show?

If I'm this nervous now, imagine how nervous I'm going to be

when I have to sing in front of the whole school.

Well, you know what they say.

Just picture everyone naked.

Who says that? Are you picturing me naked?

[LAUGHS] No.

What were you going to say?

Just forget the crowd.

Close your eyes, take a deep breath,

and imagine singing to one person.

Yeah, but then I'm just going to picture Wes,

then I'm going to be even more nervous.

Right. Wes.

Well, if he really cares about you,

it doesn't matter what happens.

He'll still love it.

Thanks, Peter. You're the best.

[PLAYING]

[EXHALES SHARPLY]

[HUMMING VARYING PITCHES]

Whoo! Yeah!

JOANNA: That was my warm-up.

PETER: I knew that.

I'm just supporting you.

Oh, my God.

I just realized I'm going to have to sing

in front of all of my old co-workers

who know I'm Carl's ex.

Wait, is it too late to turn around?

No way.

I've been really looking forward to the mashed potato bar.

You know, they serve them in mason jars.

Everything's better in mason jars.

Okay, so you're primarily here for the mason jar perks.

I mean, I guess I want to hear you sing too.

Although "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" wouldn't be my pick.

What would your pick be?

K-Ci & JoJo, "All My Life."

[LAUGHS]

That's the perfect love song.

Oh, gosh.

♪ All my life ♪

♪ I've prayed for someone Like you ♪

JOANNA [LAUGHS]: Wow.

Peter, thanks.

Thank you for coming with me.

You're an amazing friend for doing this.

Yeah. No problem.

You know, because you're close to me.

You're like my father.

Close to me. You're like my mother.

[LAUGHS]

♪ Close to me ♪

♪ You're like my sister ♪

♪ Close to me You're like my brother ♪

[♪♪♪]

It's no big deal. You can have the bed,

and I'll just take the floor.

Oh. You don't have to do that, Peter.

[CELL PHONE VIBRATES]

This is Mark. I'm gonna get this.

Okay.

What's up, man?

I'm locked out of my bedroom.

What?

Chloe. Told her she looked cute,

and apparently she took that as an insult, so--

CHLOE: I am not cute.

MARK: Lesson learned.

I'm pretty sure

there's more to that story.

But I'm at the wedding with Joanna.

Sorry.

Ooh, how's that going?

Pretty good. Easy drive up. Nice venue.

And the room I'm sharing with Joanna only has one bed.

Dude, on purpose?

Yeah.

She booked the room.

I may be taking a leap,

but maybe this is her way of saying

that she wants to hook up.

Maybe or maybe not, but while Joanna

keeps you guessing, you're missing out on a sure thing.

You're a single guy at a wedding, dude.

Single women are motivated by jealousy and alcohol,

and that's all a wedding is, and you're gonna be in a suit.

Dude, game over.

That's not the plan for tonight.

So I'm sure your plan is to just sit there and try to wonder

what this whole "one bedroom" situation is.

Well, my five-point plan has been perfected over the years

on how to get laid at a wedding.

I don't want to be that guy.

Step number one: be that guy.

Step number two: drop a sweet reason why you're there.

Step number three: a little game I like to play,

called Guess Your Drink. Step number four: peacock.

Take off your jacket, roll up your sleeves--

Mark, I'm just here for Joanna.

I mean, to support her.

Ah, see? That's step two. You're listening.

Look, if you want the rest of the plan, man,

just text me, all right?

CHLOE: You want cute? Go get a stuffed animal.

Hey, maybe we can get some massages later--

Oh, you got a cot.

Yeah. I called the front desk, they brought one up.

Problem solved.

Awesome.

[STRUMMING]

Hey,

I'm going to go check out the rest of the resort,

and give you some time to practice on your own.

Okay. Thanks.

[DOOR CLOSES]

PETER: All right, Mark. Let's see what you got.

Ninety-eight percent of women

drink a vodka soda lime at a wedding?

Hey, sorry I took so long.

Wow. You look amazing.

Thanks for the room.

Yeah, no problem.

The hand dryers down here at the restroom

work better than expected.

Jojo!

Jojo, look at you.

And this guy, hi. Good to see you.

LISA: You look so beautiful. What's up?

Wow, you guys are ready, huh?

Most florists turn down a complimentary invite,

but Ryan and I are using this wedding as our last hurrah.

Tomorrow we start trying.

What? Trying?

Oh, as in, like, "trying" trying.

Like, baby-making time.

These tubes are ready to drop it like it's hot.

Ew.

I'm not comfortable

with that either.

Whatever, we're going hard.

Ryan has been pre-gaming all day.

Honestly, I've been planning this for, like, a long time.

Like, years. I got us matching flasks.

LISA: Whoo!

That's...

All right, here's the game.

If you see the bride's mom's cleave, you drink once.

If you see the flower girl crying, you drink twice.

If you see a dog in a tuxedo, you drink three times.

Wait, what was the first one again?

I don't know. Who cares?

We're having fun! It's a party.

[STRING MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey, I like those dresses.

PETER: Hey, how about the music?

I'm digging the strings. Classy.

What about like a cover band or something?

Dude, what if they start playing classical covers of pop songs?

Like K-Ci & JoJo?

Yes.

You're obsessed.

Yeah, because it's the perfect love song.

[LAUGHS]

Hey.

Are you okay?

I'm feeling a little nauseous.

I'm going to go to the bathroom. Do you want to come?

Yeah. How about I get you some water.

Okay.

Hey. Girls going to the bathroom together?

Drink. I'll race you there.

[♪♪♪]

Allison.

Hi.

What are you doing here?

Uh, just working through pre-show jitters.

Oh, let me-- Let me get one of your bridesmaids.

Oh, no, no. Please stay. Stay.

I'm fine.

I can't believe I'm one of those brides.

It's totally normal, okay?

How are you supposed to really know

it's the right person forever? I mean...

You know, I don't know that I am qualified to answer.

I mean, I-- I love Carl. I do.

Do you want to just...

Tell me, should I marry...?

Allison, Allison, you and Carl...

you couldn't be more perfect for each other, okay?

When I look at you two it's so obvious

how much love there is between you.

Okay. Yeah.

You know, how do you know

that you're supposed to marry someone?

You marry the person that always has your back.

You know, that challenges you and supports you

and makes you the best version of yourself, you know?

The person you can't imagine not being in your life.

You-- You marry your best friend.

Yeah.

Okay?

Right.

[SNIFFLES]

Okay.

Thank you so much.

Okay. I'm going to see you in there.

Okay.

Okay.

[SIGHS]

[EXHALES]

[SIGHS]

Thank you.

Joanna, I need to tell you something.

I need to tell you something too.

I'll go first.

I'm pregnant.

What?

Oh, you're going to have a baby?

Oh, my God!

What?

I know.

How long have you known?

I don't know.

I had a feeling, and then I--

Hold on. Wait, wait, wait. What were you going to say?

Okay.

How do I even say this? Um...

I think I could actually marry Peter.

What?

When did you find--?

Oh.

Tell me about it after.

Hey. Sorry.

Ryan wanted to squeeze in another drink

before the wedding.

The guy's a maniac.

Ah.

Carl did the whole sneakers on the groomsmen.

I'm into it. Yay or nay for your wedding?

Um, I don't know.

Fair enough.

Oh, and how do you feel about bow ties?

When you visualize your husband,

do you see him in a bow tie or an open collar like me?

Um...

Hey, your song is going to go great.

And you should dry your hands before you start playing.

Pretty sweaty.

MINISTER: Then, by the powers vested in me,

I now pronounce you man and wife.

You may now kiss the bride.

GUESTS: Whoo!

[APPLAUSE]

MINISTER: Ladies and gentlemen,

I introduce to you Mr. and Mrs. Dattani.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

Okay, so you want to marry Peter now?

And this is outside of the pact?

Or this is because of the pact? I can't keep up.

I know how crazy it must sound, okay?

But I was talking to Allison,

and we were talking about how you know if someone's the one.

And I was listing everything that mattered.

And I realized that I was just describing Peter.

Oh.

Sorry. Raging hormones.

That's so sweet.

Oh, whoa. You can't--

Oh, relax. It's water.

What?

I've known I've been pregnant since yesterday.

I just haven't told Ryan yet.

Why not?

Because he was so excited about tonight.

He sent me an Evite to go big.

I didn't want to ruin that for him.

How does telling him he's going to be a dad ruin anything?

I can't. You know how he gets.

All emotional and overwhelmed.

And then he starts giving speeches.

And there's already enough of those going on here.

Lisa, you can't keep making excuses, okay?

You're starting a family. That's all that matters.

You have to go tell him.

You tell Peter.

What am I supposed to even say?

"Hi. Hi, Peter. Um, I want to marry you."

Perfect. That sounds great.

No, I have to figure out what this means first.

Do you?

You guys are, like, two peas in a pod.

You're good.

Okay.

I'll tell Peter if you tell Ryan.

Is this another one of your pacts?

Because that's working out so well for you.

Okay. I can do this.

Yeah. Yeah, me too.

Let's go.

Okay.

[RYAN AND PETER SPEAKING JAPANESE]

Mmm!

Mmm!

Oh, that's disgusting.

[COUGHS]

Hey, do you know what, though?

I'm kicking it off with a two-to-one drink ratio.

It's going to be drink, drink, water.

Wow.

And then...

dance, rest, repeat.

Because I got to stay hydrated

to be in peak baby-making shape for tomorrow.

Well, everyone says that it's like work,

but you get to start having sex three to four times a day.

Oh...

Actually, that does sound like work.

You know, man, it's work,

but it's worth it.

You know, I can't wait to teach my little one

about why the sky is blue, why birds sing,

why you can't call women cute.

Yeah, why is that?

Because it makes them feel childish.

Really?

God. You, though.

You must clean up.

Oh...

What's your plan, man? Look at you.

Your face, your amazing skin.

You-- Single at a wedding?

That's like--

Yeah, yeah.

Everyone keeps saying that.

And they should.

They should, man.

I can't believe you still have your pants on.

[LAUGHS]

That's crazy.

You're crazy.

You're crazy!

No, I'm not crazy.

Hey, Ryan?

Um, Lisa is looking for you over by the table.

Oh, okay.

[GRUNTS]

Oh, oh, okay. Keeping that heart healthy for tomorrow, huh?

No, that's my dance.

Okay.

Poor Lisa.

Hey, how are you feeling?

Uh...I have to tell you something.

Yeah.

[♪♪♪]

They-- They switched our tables.

I am at 8 now, and you are at 3.

Oh.

Well, that sucks.

Yeah.

Was there something else?

No. Um...

you...you are free, free to go to Table 3.

[LAUGHS]

Have you had a couple of drinks?

Do you want me to get you some water?

Because you got to sing soon.

No, I-- That's a good idea.

I'll get it.

You stay. I go. Okay.

[SIGHS]

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

[CHILDREN LAUGHING]

Oh, hey. I miss you. Mwah.

There's a photo booth that is just begging to be violated.

Right over there.

Thanks, um, but I actually came here to tell you something.

Oh, okay.

Yeah.

What is it?

Uh, it is that I'm...

pacing myself.

Uh, no drinks for another hour.

So I'm going to just take it easy.

Oh, okay.

Okay, I can-- That's a good strategy.

Oh, God, look at those kids.

They're so cute.

LISA: Aww.

Actually, sweetie--

God, it's so good to have one last night

to just be reckless married people.

When you're empty that means it's not enough.

Especially, like, at a wedding.

Excuse me, is this Table 3?

Yeah.

Hi. I'm Peter.

Kate.

Katie.

Caitlin.

Jan.

So how do you know Carl or Allison?

I don't know either of them, actually.

I'm just here supporting a friend.

ALL: Aww.

That is the sweetest reason

to be at a wedding.

Oh, let's make some room for him, ladies.

KATE: Okay, sit right here.

JAN: Actually, there's more room on this side,

and that chair's wobbly.

CAITLIN: Right here in the middle.

KATE: You were about to go to the bathroom.

There was a bee over there. It might be dangerous.

Ladies, ladies, before I sit down,

let me get everyone a new round of drinks.

Let me guess. Four vodka soda limes.

How did you know that's my favorite drink?

I'm very intuitive.

That's amazing.

Plus, your empty glasses have lime wedges in them.

Oh, my goodness.

You caught us.

I'll be right back with your drinks. Yeah.

Oh, my God, did you see the way he looked at me?

Hi. I don't believe we've met.

I'm Guy.

Nice to meet you.

Oh. Lovely wedding, huh?

I'm just here chaperoning my aunt Evelyn.

So, what are you drinking there?

Is that an appletini?

Is it a kaletini? I don't know. What is it?

Hey.

Oh, hi. I'm Guy.

And you are?

Married and pregnant.

Oh. You don't even look fat yet.

That's weird to say.

Interesting.

I'm going to go ahead and guess

that you haven't talked to Peter yet,

because he's surrounded by women.

He is?

Yeah.

He's a single guy at a wedding.

Well, how did Ryan take the news?

You didn't tell him.

Joanna, we're almost ready for you.

You'll be great.

Good luck.

Ooh, wow. It's really hot, huh?

[LAUGHS] Much better.

Yeah.

Step five.

[SNIFFLING]

Hi.

[GUITAR BEING PLAYED]

Um, sorry, Carl and Allison.

I'd actually like to play a different song, if that's okay.

Um...

A perfect love song.

[PLUCKING GENTLE NOTES]

♪ I will never find Another lover ♪

♪ Sweeter than you Sweeter than you ♪

♪ I will never find Another lover ♪

♪ More precious than you ♪

♪ Boy, you are close to me You're like my mother ♪

♪ Close to me You're like my father ♪

♪ Close to me You're like my sister ♪

♪ Me, you're like My brother ♪

♪ You are the only one My everything ♪

♪ For you this song I sing ♪

♪ All my life ♪

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Genius idea to get away from the crowd.

Yeah, I figured it's easier

to have a real conversation over here.

Remind me to thank that friend you're here supporting.

♪ All my life ♪

♪ I've prayed for someone Like you ♪

♪ And I thank God That I ♪

♪ That I finally Found you ♪

♪ All my life ♪

♪ I've prayed for someone Like you ♪

♪ And I pray that you Feel the same way too ♪

♪ Yes, I pray ♪

♪ That you do Love me too ♪

[APPLAUSE]

Please find your seats. Dinner is served.

Wait, cocktail hour's over?

Hey, I'm going to go check on a friend,

and I'll meet you back at the table.

[INAUDIBLE]

Joanna. Hey.

[SIGHS]

Hey.

So, what'd you think?

I'm sorry.

Why?

[SIGHS]

I missed it.

Oh.

I took a walk with Kate, and--

Who's Kate?

She's at my table, and we started talking,

and...damn.

I'm so sorry.

It's-- It's okay

No, no, no, no. I really wanted to see it,

and my whole job was to support you.

Don't worry about it.

It's fine. It doesn't matter.

You sure?

Yeah. It's fine.

Well, you did it.

Yeah! It's over.

It's over.

I'm sure it was amazing and, hey,

I say we celebrate. Let's--

There's some cotton candy. Let's take a photo booth.

Come on.

I'm just going to check on Lisa.

I'll find you in a bit, okay?

Okay.

Okay.

Damn.

[♪♪♪]

Hey, Lis.

Oh, my God. Jo.

The song was so beautiful.

Thank you.

Was it for Peter?

Yeah.

But, uh, he didn't see it.

He was outside talking to some great girl he just met.

I'm sorry.

It's okay.

It's not like it would have changed anything, you know.

Have you told Ryan yet?

No.

[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]

Look, I get it.

Like, you want tonight to be memorable for him.

But wouldn't it be more memorable if you told him?

Yeah, I'm not waiting because of the last hurrah thing.

I'm scared.

The minute I tell Ryan, it becomes real.

We're going to be parents.

Yeah.

It's life-changing.

Lis, you're going to be the most incredible mom.

Ryan's going to be the best dad.

You can do this. Tell him.

Okay. Thank you.

Okay.

Hey, hey, honey. I want to talk to you.

I'm pregnant.

[LAUGHS]

You are? What?

Yeah.

[LAUGHING]

Oh, my God.

I love you.

Oh, my God. She's pregnant.

Oh, my God...

Everything you've done today has been so perfect.

Okay, picture your wedding.

Do you go with a DJ or a band?

I don't know. Both are cool.

Hey, uh, just give me a second.

Hey, I just wanted to say congratulations.

Thanks. It was Peter, right?

Yeah, I'm Joanna's friend.

Her song was amazing.

I could barely keep it together.

Oh, yeah, she's incredibly talented.

And "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" is a beautiful song.

Great choice.

Uh, she pulled an audible.

ALLISON: Yeah, she surprised us.

K-Ci & JoJo's "All My Life."

It was perfect.

[♪♪♪]

Hey.

♪ And I finally Found you ♪

It's the perfect love song.

[♪♪♪]