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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,138 --> 00:00:08,068 [SUGAR RAY'S "EVERY MORNING" PLAYING] 2 00:00:12,144 --> 00:00:15,784 I am not looking forward to yearbook pictures tomorrow. 3 00:00:15,815 --> 00:00:17,745 Every time I try to smile naturally, 4 00:00:17,783 --> 00:00:20,053 I always end up doing this: 5 00:00:23,255 --> 00:00:25,255 Come on, you're so photogenic. 6 00:00:25,291 --> 00:00:29,261 Just make sure you show off your puka shells. 7 00:00:29,295 --> 00:00:32,225 Hey, you know our senior quotes are due tomorrow, right? 8 00:00:32,264 --> 00:00:33,634 Yeah. You remember our plan? 9 00:00:33,666 --> 00:00:35,566 You still down to pick quotes for each other? 10 00:00:35,601 --> 00:00:37,271 Actually, I think I found you one. 11 00:00:37,303 --> 00:00:40,773 "We love the things we love for what they are." 12 00:00:40,806 --> 00:00:43,536 You remembered I like Robert Frost. 13 00:00:40,806 --> 00:00:43,536 Yeah. 14 00:00:43,576 --> 00:00:46,076 I actually think I got one for you too. 15 00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:48,412 "You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take." 16 00:00:48,447 --> 00:00:50,147 Wayne Gretzky. 17 00:00:50,182 --> 00:00:51,482 I like that. 18 00:00:51,517 --> 00:00:54,317 And I think future Peter will like that too. 19 00:00:54,353 --> 00:00:57,393 Okay, I'm done with my profile. What do you think? 20 00:00:57,423 --> 00:00:59,463 All right, let me see. 21 00:00:59,492 --> 00:01:00,732 Really? 22 00:01:00,759 --> 00:01:02,699 "I take the road less traveled." 23 00:01:02,728 --> 00:01:04,498 I do. 24 00:01:04,530 --> 00:01:06,100 Why won't you take my suggestion? 25 00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:07,602 It's like, gold. 26 00:01:07,633 --> 00:01:09,803 Like, pure gold. 27 00:01:07,633 --> 00:01:09,803 Jo-wanna? 28 00:01:09,835 --> 00:01:11,765 Yes. Jo-wanna date me? 29 00:01:11,804 --> 00:01:13,744 That is just so bad. 30 00:01:11,804 --> 00:01:13,744 Come on. 31 00:01:13,772 --> 00:01:15,742 All guys love puns. 32 00:01:13,772 --> 00:01:15,742 So bad. 33 00:01:15,774 --> 00:01:17,614 Jo-wanna go get some sushi? 34 00:01:17,643 --> 00:01:19,853 Jo-wanna get with me? 35 00:01:19,879 --> 00:01:22,819 You need to stop. 36 00:01:19,879 --> 00:01:22,819 Jo-wanna go to the movie-- 37 00:01:22,848 --> 00:01:25,788 [♪♪♪] 38 00:01:29,855 --> 00:01:31,615 PETER: So you're done yet? 39 00:01:31,657 --> 00:01:33,257 I'm not sure if it's ready. 40 00:01:33,292 --> 00:01:35,132 Let me see. 41 00:01:36,629 --> 00:01:38,299 Uh, here's your tip. 42 00:01:38,330 --> 00:01:41,230 You don't wanna say you're DTF in your profile. 43 00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:44,137 Why? Chloe said it means "Down To Flirt." 44 00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:45,710 Being out of the country for seven years 45 00:01:45,738 --> 00:01:47,768 has left you a little behind on the current lingo. 46 00:01:47,806 --> 00:01:50,536 Whatever. You done with your profile yet? 47 00:01:50,576 --> 00:01:52,376 No, I've been checking my fantasy league. 48 00:01:52,411 --> 00:01:53,711 Are you serious? Peter, like-- 49 00:01:53,746 --> 00:01:55,346 We're supposed to do this together. 50 00:01:55,381 --> 00:01:57,921 Motivate each other. 51 00:01:55,381 --> 00:01:57,921 No, no, no, I want to. I... 52 00:01:57,950 --> 00:02:00,490 just wanna meet someone in real life. 53 00:02:00,519 --> 00:02:02,689 All right, well, I'm going live. 54 00:02:02,721 --> 00:02:04,561 Ooh. Ready? 55 00:02:04,590 --> 00:02:06,330 Wait. I feel really nervous. 56 00:02:06,358 --> 00:02:08,288 Come on. No, it's okay. 57 00:02:06,358 --> 00:02:08,288 Why am I nervous? 58 00:02:08,327 --> 00:02:09,927 It's okay. Here we go. 59 00:02:08,327 --> 00:02:09,927 Okay. 60 00:02:09,962 --> 00:02:11,302 [BEEPS] 61 00:02:14,433 --> 00:02:16,573 Chloe made it seem like people start messaging you, 62 00:02:16,602 --> 00:02:18,172 like, right away, but... 63 00:02:18,204 --> 00:02:19,844 Did you press the right button? 64 00:02:19,872 --> 00:02:24,242 Uh-- Hey, hey, it's okay. It's... 65 00:02:24,276 --> 00:02:26,806 Apps aren't for everyone-- 66 00:02:24,276 --> 00:02:26,806 [CELL PHONE BEEPING] 67 00:02:26,845 --> 00:02:29,745 Oh. 68 00:02:26,845 --> 00:02:29,745 [BEEPING MORE RAPIDLY] 69 00:02:31,584 --> 00:02:33,424 Oh, you know, I'll just... 70 00:02:33,452 --> 00:02:35,292 cancel it. 71 00:02:33,452 --> 00:02:35,292 [CELL PHONE BUZZING] 72 00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:36,821 Ah. 73 00:02:36,855 --> 00:02:39,925 Oh, my gosh. What? 74 00:02:36,855 --> 00:02:39,925 What, what? 75 00:02:39,959 --> 00:02:41,589 Did you see Mark on there? 76 00:02:39,959 --> 00:02:41,589 You-- Hey! 77 00:02:41,627 --> 00:02:42,857 You don't wanna do apps. 78 00:02:42,895 --> 00:02:44,395 You don't get to play this game. 79 00:02:44,430 --> 00:02:46,400 Oh. Oh, oh, okay. All right. 80 00:02:44,430 --> 00:02:46,400 [LAUGHS] 81 00:02:46,432 --> 00:02:48,332 Okay. 82 00:02:46,432 --> 00:02:48,332 Oh, wow. 83 00:02:48,367 --> 00:02:50,467 All right. Well, I guess I'll leave you to it. 84 00:02:50,502 --> 00:02:52,342 Happy swipin'. 85 00:02:52,371 --> 00:02:55,241 Wow. Hello. Yes. 86 00:02:55,274 --> 00:02:57,584 [INHALES SHARPLY] 87 00:02:57,610 --> 00:02:59,750 Man, I don't get you. 88 00:02:59,778 --> 00:03:02,448 First, you make a pact with a girl not to date her. 89 00:03:02,481 --> 00:03:04,751 Now you're telling me you don't wanna use dating apps? 90 00:03:04,783 --> 00:03:06,893 I met all my girlfriends in real life. 91 00:03:06,919 --> 00:03:09,259 Nobody does things IRL anymore. 92 00:03:09,288 --> 00:03:10,718 Okay? That's why the term IRL exists. 93 00:03:10,756 --> 00:03:12,426 Are you gonna help me out or not? 94 00:03:12,458 --> 00:03:14,528 Yeah, I'm coming with the sniper. Go for the top. 95 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:15,800 Oh! 96 00:03:15,828 --> 00:03:16,928 Man, you're asking me to do 97 00:03:16,962 --> 00:03:18,862 something I haven't done since '07. 98 00:03:18,897 --> 00:03:20,567 A time when phones were just phones. 99 00:03:20,599 --> 00:03:22,469 Psh-- Are you scared? 100 00:03:22,501 --> 00:03:24,741 You got no game without a phone? 101 00:03:22,501 --> 00:03:24,741 [SCOFFS] 102 00:03:24,770 --> 00:03:26,340 I've got game. 103 00:03:24,770 --> 00:03:26,340 Okay. 104 00:03:26,372 --> 00:03:28,412 Okay? Good techniques are timeless. 105 00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:29,780 You know what, I'm gonna take care of you. 106 00:03:29,808 --> 00:03:31,578 I'll take you to the spot. 107 00:03:31,610 --> 00:03:33,650 It's got really good music, sexy bodies, 108 00:03:33,679 --> 00:03:35,649 and it's members only. 109 00:03:35,681 --> 00:03:38,951 Uh...I don't know about this. 110 00:03:35,681 --> 00:03:38,951 Look, Peter, 111 00:03:38,984 --> 00:03:42,394 You wanted off-app? This is off-app. 112 00:03:42,421 --> 00:03:44,791 Let's go get some ladies. Heh, heh? 113 00:03:44,823 --> 00:03:47,333 All right. 114 00:03:47,359 --> 00:03:50,429 Why am I unpacking your things again? 115 00:03:50,462 --> 00:03:52,632 Because I'm grading papers and shaping young minds, 116 00:03:52,665 --> 00:03:54,765 and you're a very kind big sister. 117 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:56,040 Thank you. 118 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:56,040 [GROANS] 119 00:03:56,068 --> 00:03:57,938 I hate this. 120 00:03:57,970 --> 00:04:00,340 I feel so superficial. 121 00:04:00,372 --> 00:04:01,912 All dating's a little superficial. 122 00:04:01,940 --> 00:04:04,280 Yeah, but at a bar, you just... 123 00:04:04,310 --> 00:04:06,510 kind of gaze past someone if you're not interested. 124 00:04:06,545 --> 00:04:09,415 Here, I'm literally just swiping them away. 125 00:04:09,448 --> 00:04:11,278 These are real people, 126 00:04:11,317 --> 00:04:13,947 and I'm just treating them like they're disposable. 127 00:04:13,986 --> 00:04:16,816 They are disposable. They're disposable humans. 128 00:04:16,855 --> 00:04:19,585 Joanna, dating is a numbers game, okay? 129 00:04:19,625 --> 00:04:22,925 You need to meet a lot of guys in order to find the right one. 130 00:04:22,961 --> 00:04:25,361 Would you sample just one flavor at Froyo Life? 131 00:04:25,397 --> 00:04:27,327 Absolutely not. You're gonna try 'em all, 132 00:04:27,366 --> 00:04:28,996 and you're not gonna worry about 133 00:04:29,034 --> 00:04:31,544 whether or not you're hurting boysenberry's feelings, okay? 134 00:04:31,570 --> 00:04:33,940 Boysenberry should know that it's not for everyone. 135 00:04:33,972 --> 00:04:35,782 I like boysenberry. 136 00:04:33,972 --> 00:04:35,782 CHLOE: Do you? 137 00:04:35,808 --> 00:04:39,508 'Cause Ryan is more like a... a plain tart. 138 00:04:39,545 --> 00:04:41,545 Yeah, a tart with strawberries. 139 00:04:41,580 --> 00:04:42,780 And mochi. 140 00:04:42,815 --> 00:04:44,515 Joanna, you just moved back. 141 00:04:44,550 --> 00:04:46,620 Why are you suddenly so anxious to find a date? 142 00:04:46,652 --> 00:04:48,552 Did she not tell you about the pact? 143 00:04:48,587 --> 00:04:50,617 What pact? 144 00:04:50,656 --> 00:04:52,356 Oh, my God. Is this the high school pact 145 00:04:52,391 --> 00:04:54,091 where you have to get married by the time you're 30? 146 00:04:54,126 --> 00:04:56,656 Okay, yes, but... it's gonna be good. 147 00:04:56,695 --> 00:04:58,955 Okay, it's just to help push us to get back out there. 148 00:04:58,997 --> 00:05:00,727 You realize most people just date 149 00:05:00,766 --> 00:05:02,396 without promising to marry a friend? 150 00:05:02,434 --> 00:05:04,874 Oh, my gosh, Mark will not take a hint. 151 00:05:04,903 --> 00:05:06,873 I'm clearly trying to ghost him, 152 00:05:06,905 --> 00:05:09,005 and why can't he just accept that and move on? 153 00:05:09,041 --> 00:05:10,241 I'm sorry, "ghost him"? 154 00:05:10,276 --> 00:05:14,576 "Ghosting" is when you cease all contact. You just disappear. 155 00:05:14,613 --> 00:05:17,623 It's moments like these that I'm so grateful to be married 156 00:05:17,649 --> 00:05:19,689 and I don't have to deal with that stuff anymore. 157 00:05:19,718 --> 00:05:21,918 You must miss it, like, a little bit, though, right? 158 00:05:21,954 --> 00:05:24,494 The only drama I need or want in my life 159 00:05:24,523 --> 00:05:26,533 is handcrafted by Shonda Rhimes. 160 00:05:26,558 --> 00:05:29,658 On that note, some people need some flowers. 161 00:05:29,695 --> 00:05:31,955 Peace, bitches. 162 00:05:29,695 --> 00:05:31,955 Bye. 163 00:05:31,997 --> 00:05:32,967 See you later. 164 00:05:32,998 --> 00:05:34,928 LISA: Bye. 165 00:05:32,998 --> 00:05:34,928 Okay, give me this. 166 00:05:34,967 --> 00:05:36,667 Whoa, whoa. What-- What are you doing? 167 00:05:36,702 --> 00:05:39,002 Go get ready. Four guys, 15 minutes each, 168 00:05:39,037 --> 00:05:40,907 we're knockin' it out this afternoon. 169 00:05:40,939 --> 00:05:42,479 Is that even possible? 170 00:05:42,508 --> 00:05:44,008 Joanna, this is a dating application, 171 00:05:44,042 --> 00:05:45,612 and these are thirsty dudes. 172 00:05:45,644 --> 00:05:47,954 Yes, it's possible. I hope you're DTF. 173 00:05:47,980 --> 00:05:50,850 Hey, I know what that means now. 174 00:05:50,883 --> 00:05:53,153 [WEIGHTS CLANKING] 175 00:05:53,185 --> 00:05:55,615 [♪♪♪] 176 00:05:55,654 --> 00:05:57,464 Mark. What's up, man? 177 00:05:57,489 --> 00:05:58,689 Hey, Todd. 178 00:05:58,724 --> 00:06:00,434 All right, hear me out. 179 00:06:00,459 --> 00:06:02,999 This month, 10 classes, only 5 grand. What do you say? 180 00:06:03,028 --> 00:06:06,398 Wow. That is-- I am... 181 00:06:06,432 --> 00:06:07,902 gonna think about that. 182 00:06:06,432 --> 00:06:07,902 All right. 183 00:06:07,933 --> 00:06:09,003 Well, you know where to find me. 184 00:06:09,034 --> 00:06:10,604 What's up, man? I'm Todd. 185 00:06:10,636 --> 00:06:11,966 I'm Peter. 186 00:06:10,636 --> 00:06:11,966 Yeah. 187 00:06:12,004 --> 00:06:13,874 You wanna get swole, bro? 188 00:06:13,906 --> 00:06:15,876 Give me a call. 189 00:06:13,906 --> 00:06:15,876 Thanks. 190 00:06:15,908 --> 00:06:17,708 All right, guys. See you later. 191 00:06:17,743 --> 00:06:19,753 What's up with that guy? 192 00:06:17,743 --> 00:06:19,753 Oh, that's a... 193 00:06:19,778 --> 00:06:21,048 walking douche-nozzle. 194 00:06:21,079 --> 00:06:22,619 I take this free lesson with him, 195 00:06:22,648 --> 00:06:24,048 and he just doesn't get off my back. 196 00:06:24,082 --> 00:06:26,052 He's got me on that Peelio diet. 197 00:06:26,084 --> 00:06:28,624 Aren't a lot of people on the Paleo diet? 198 00:06:28,654 --> 00:06:30,594 No, no, no. Peelio diet. 199 00:06:30,622 --> 00:06:32,632 It's where you only eat food that you peel. 200 00:06:32,658 --> 00:06:34,828 I was only eating bananas, shrimp-- 201 00:06:34,860 --> 00:06:35,860 Ugh. 202 00:06:34,860 --> 00:06:35,860 What is it? 203 00:06:35,894 --> 00:06:37,834 It's Chloe. She's... 204 00:06:37,863 --> 00:06:39,673 typing, but she's not sending anything. 205 00:06:39,698 --> 00:06:40,998 She's dot-dot-dotting me, bro. 206 00:06:41,033 --> 00:06:42,203 [SIGHS] Whatever, man. 207 00:06:42,234 --> 00:06:44,544 Let's go home. I don't see any girls. 208 00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:47,070 Hey-- Whoa, whoa, relax. What are you talkin' about, buddy? 209 00:06:47,105 --> 00:06:48,435 It's the bottom of the hour. 210 00:06:48,474 --> 00:06:49,844 Wait for it. 211 00:06:49,875 --> 00:06:51,675 Wait for it... 212 00:06:51,710 --> 00:06:52,810 Boom. 213 00:06:52,845 --> 00:06:54,975 [♪♪♪] 214 00:07:02,821 --> 00:07:04,561 Ugh-- Dude, what are you doing? 215 00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:06,960 This is disinfectant spray. Jeez, it's in my eyes. 216 00:07:06,992 --> 00:07:08,932 It's okay, you look hot and sweaty and ready. 217 00:07:08,961 --> 00:07:10,461 What's up, ladies? 218 00:07:10,496 --> 00:07:12,126 Curls for the girls, pink shirt, glasses. 219 00:07:12,164 --> 00:07:14,074 Hey-- 220 00:07:14,099 --> 00:07:15,599 [WOMAN MUTTERING] 221 00:07:14,099 --> 00:07:15,599 Well, 222 00:07:15,634 --> 00:07:17,544 nothing says, "Please come talk to me," 223 00:07:17,569 --> 00:07:19,669 like a phone in the face. 224 00:07:17,569 --> 00:07:19,669 Are they gone? 225 00:07:19,705 --> 00:07:22,505 So your profile says you're a film connoisseur? 226 00:07:22,541 --> 00:07:24,111 [CHUCKLES] 227 00:07:22,541 --> 00:07:24,111 What's your favorite film? 228 00:07:24,142 --> 00:07:26,112 I'd probably have to say When Harry Met Sally. 229 00:07:26,144 --> 00:07:29,114 That is a...movie? It's not a film. 230 00:07:29,147 --> 00:07:30,617 Uh, what's the difference? 231 00:07:30,649 --> 00:07:32,049 Oh, God. 232 00:07:32,084 --> 00:07:34,154 I'll make it 45 hundred. 233 00:07:32,084 --> 00:07:34,154 I'm on the phone. 234 00:07:34,186 --> 00:07:35,956 Forty-five hundred. 235 00:07:34,186 --> 00:07:35,956 [MARK SIGHS] 236 00:07:35,988 --> 00:07:38,188 [♪♪♪] 237 00:07:38,223 --> 00:07:40,163 [EXHALES] 238 00:07:40,192 --> 00:07:42,132 Do you work out here a lot? 239 00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:43,800 [MUSIC PLAYS INDISTINCTLY] 240 00:07:43,829 --> 00:07:46,029 Okay. Good talk. 241 00:07:46,064 --> 00:07:47,674 So you must really be into jewelry. 242 00:07:47,699 --> 00:07:49,899 I love the way a ring slides on and off my finger. 243 00:07:49,935 --> 00:07:51,195 On and off... 244 00:07:51,236 --> 00:07:52,806 On... 245 00:07:52,838 --> 00:07:54,608 and off... 246 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:56,540 Hey, I-I love those glass water bottles. 247 00:07:56,575 --> 00:07:58,905 You know, I heard the plastic ones were really bad for you. 248 00:07:58,944 --> 00:08:00,784 I try to be super eco-friendly. 249 00:08:00,812 --> 00:08:03,552 Oh, that's awesome. Yeah, yeah, I'm trying to get into that. 250 00:08:03,582 --> 00:08:05,992 I'm doing a beach cleanup. You should come. 251 00:08:06,018 --> 00:08:07,148 I would love to. 252 00:08:07,185 --> 00:08:08,585 It's at the, um... 253 00:08:07,185 --> 00:08:08,585 [SNAPS] 254 00:08:08,620 --> 00:08:10,160 Oh, what-- Babe? 255 00:08:10,188 --> 00:08:12,988 What's that beach we're cleaning up this weekend? 256 00:08:13,025 --> 00:08:16,555 It's okay. I-I-I recycle at home already. 257 00:08:16,595 --> 00:08:18,095 You know, you're lucky I swiped right. 258 00:08:18,130 --> 00:08:20,530 You only have one photo. 259 00:08:18,130 --> 00:08:20,530 What's wrong with that? 260 00:08:20,566 --> 00:08:21,826 The ideal number is five. 261 00:08:21,867 --> 00:08:23,867 One smiling photo, one at a formal event, 262 00:08:23,902 --> 00:08:26,012 one with your hot friends to show you're not a loner, 263 00:08:26,038 --> 00:08:27,938 one duck face selfie, and one on the beach. 264 00:08:27,973 --> 00:08:31,243 Ideally in a bikini and not a one-piece. 265 00:08:31,276 --> 00:08:35,006 Hey. 266 00:08:31,276 --> 00:08:35,006 Hey. 267 00:08:35,047 --> 00:08:36,277 Hey, I like your necklace. 268 00:08:36,315 --> 00:08:38,075 Oh. Thanks. I made it myself. 269 00:08:38,116 --> 00:08:40,746 Hey, this might be too forward, but, uh... 270 00:08:40,786 --> 00:08:42,316 would you like to... 271 00:08:42,354 --> 00:08:45,324 Are you asking me out on a date? 272 00:08:45,357 --> 00:08:46,857 Yeah. 273 00:08:46,892 --> 00:08:49,032 Why don't you be a regular person in 2016 274 00:08:49,061 --> 00:08:52,161 and just be on an app? 275 00:08:52,197 --> 00:08:53,567 Right. 276 00:08:53,599 --> 00:08:55,029 Wow. You're, like, the first 277 00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:57,197 normal guy I've met from online dating, 278 00:08:57,235 --> 00:08:58,695 and it is such a relief. 279 00:08:57,235 --> 00:08:58,695 Oh. 280 00:08:58,737 --> 00:09:01,967 Yeah, God, there's just so many weirdos out there. 281 00:09:02,007 --> 00:09:03,837 It can be really stressful. 282 00:09:02,007 --> 00:09:03,837 Yes, totally. 283 00:09:03,875 --> 00:09:06,575 What do you--? What are you doing on Saturday? 284 00:09:06,612 --> 00:09:08,052 You know, I don't think I have plans. 285 00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:09,780 I don't know if this is forward, 286 00:09:09,815 --> 00:09:11,875 but would you wanna join me on a bit of a gathering? 287 00:09:11,917 --> 00:09:15,717 A gathering. 288 00:09:11,917 --> 00:09:15,717 A gathering of the Juggalos. 289 00:09:15,754 --> 00:09:17,694 Juggalo... 290 00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:20,333 Oh, you don't have to look it up. It's the Insane Clown Posse. 291 00:09:20,359 --> 00:09:24,129 And it's not that insane. Those guys are sweet. 292 00:09:24,162 --> 00:09:26,902 All right. Fill me in. 293 00:09:26,932 --> 00:09:28,732 Rough. 294 00:09:28,767 --> 00:09:30,267 I might've been wrong. 295 00:09:30,302 --> 00:09:31,972 Me too. 296 00:09:32,004 --> 00:09:33,314 Uh, I wanna get off apps. 297 00:09:33,338 --> 00:09:35,838 I wanna get on the apps. 298 00:09:35,874 --> 00:09:37,644 See, the problem with the apps though 299 00:09:37,676 --> 00:09:39,106 is that there's too many choices. 300 00:09:39,144 --> 00:09:41,814 Like, how can you ever find the good ones? 301 00:09:41,847 --> 00:09:44,147 Yeah, we're a generation overrun with choice. 302 00:09:44,182 --> 00:09:46,252 Seriously. Have you seen 303 00:09:46,284 --> 00:09:48,094 how many types of Chex Mix there are? 304 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:49,790 It's unreasonable. 305 00:09:49,821 --> 00:09:52,791 [♪♪♪] 306 00:09:52,824 --> 00:09:55,164 Mm. I have an idea. 307 00:09:55,193 --> 00:09:57,933 Maybe we could choose for each other. 308 00:09:57,963 --> 00:10:00,873 Look. I could read men better, and you could read women better. 309 00:10:00,899 --> 00:10:03,339 We could switch accounts and swipe for each other. 310 00:10:03,368 --> 00:10:05,838 Okay, I can get onboard with this, 311 00:10:05,871 --> 00:10:08,771 but if it doesn't work, I'm just gonna get a cat. 312 00:10:08,807 --> 00:10:10,307 Mm-hm, it'll work. 313 00:10:10,342 --> 00:10:12,282 Here. Take my phone. 314 00:10:10,342 --> 00:10:12,282 Oh, God. 315 00:10:12,310 --> 00:10:14,680 Look, it'll be fun if we don't know anything. 316 00:10:14,713 --> 00:10:16,123 We tell each other where to go, 317 00:10:16,148 --> 00:10:19,318 what time to be there, and a date will be waiting. 318 00:10:19,351 --> 00:10:21,951 Okay, so, like, a blind date with a twist. 319 00:10:21,987 --> 00:10:23,287 Mm-hm. 320 00:10:23,321 --> 00:10:25,861 Hey, just don't make my date at a gym. 321 00:10:25,891 --> 00:10:27,931 Apparently, my dead lift isn't very impressive. 322 00:10:27,959 --> 00:10:29,359 [CHUCKLES] 323 00:10:29,394 --> 00:10:33,304 Mm. Mm. This is really good, Mom. 324 00:10:33,331 --> 00:10:35,201 Did you do anything different? 325 00:10:35,233 --> 00:10:36,973 Yeah, she ordered in. 326 00:10:37,002 --> 00:10:38,172 [SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE] 327 00:10:38,203 --> 00:10:40,813 [CELL PHONE BEEPS] 328 00:10:38,203 --> 00:10:40,813 Oh! 329 00:10:40,839 --> 00:10:42,809 A message on a dating app. 330 00:10:42,841 --> 00:10:44,211 You're dating again? 331 00:10:44,242 --> 00:10:45,342 Ooh, from a dude. Interesting. 332 00:10:45,377 --> 00:10:47,177 Huh? 333 00:10:45,377 --> 00:10:47,177 [SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE] 334 00:10:47,212 --> 00:10:48,912 It's not what it looks like. 335 00:10:48,947 --> 00:10:51,077 Joanna and I are just choosing dates for each other. 336 00:10:51,116 --> 00:10:53,346 So you're open to finding a wife? 337 00:10:53,385 --> 00:10:54,985 [GASPS] 338 00:10:55,020 --> 00:10:56,260 What's going on? 339 00:10:56,288 --> 00:10:58,718 She's been waiting for this moment. 340 00:10:58,757 --> 00:11:01,057 Do not disappoint her. 341 00:11:01,093 --> 00:11:02,393 Oh, this should be interesting. 342 00:11:02,427 --> 00:11:03,827 I'm scared. 343 00:11:03,862 --> 00:11:06,772 If you see a girl you like, 344 00:11:06,798 --> 00:11:09,098 put her photo on the right. 345 00:11:09,134 --> 00:11:10,304 if you see a girl you don't like, 346 00:11:10,335 --> 00:11:12,095 put her photo on the left. 347 00:11:12,137 --> 00:11:15,167 Mom, this is like live Tinder. 348 00:11:12,137 --> 00:11:15,167 What's Tinder? 349 00:11:15,207 --> 00:11:16,877 Where did you get these photos? 350 00:11:16,908 --> 00:11:19,878 These are the daughters of friends from church. 351 00:11:19,911 --> 00:11:21,181 I'll go print some more. 352 00:11:21,213 --> 00:11:22,153 No, no, don't. 353 00:11:21,213 --> 00:11:22,153 Aiya, 354 00:11:22,180 --> 00:11:24,350 don't waste more ink. 355 00:11:24,382 --> 00:11:26,352 I don't understand. You're doing all of these 356 00:11:26,384 --> 00:11:29,794 lame, try-hard dating attempts because... why? 357 00:11:29,821 --> 00:11:31,761 'Cause I'm supposed to be married by now. 358 00:11:31,790 --> 00:11:33,930 That's what you're conditioned to believe in 359 00:11:33,959 --> 00:11:35,459 because of society. See, 360 00:11:35,494 --> 00:11:38,304 contemporary marriage derives from property exchanges 361 00:11:38,330 --> 00:11:40,170 and women needing to be owned by men. 362 00:11:40,198 --> 00:11:43,268 There's no real reason to do it. I mean, except for maybe taxes. 363 00:11:43,301 --> 00:11:45,201 Really great having you back home. 364 00:11:45,237 --> 00:11:46,737 You have someone else to annoy? 365 00:11:46,772 --> 00:11:48,942 I do, actually. 366 00:11:46,772 --> 00:11:48,942 [KEYBOARD CLICKING] 367 00:11:48,974 --> 00:11:52,984 Tiffany, looking for a sugar daddy. Nope. 368 00:11:53,011 --> 00:11:58,081 Melissa... "I love to laugh." Who doesn't love to laugh? What? 369 00:11:58,116 --> 00:12:00,886 Oh, actually, this girl's really pretty. 370 00:12:00,919 --> 00:12:01,889 That's a bot. 371 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,860 What? 372 00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:06,529 Oh, my God, it would be so funny to set him up with a bot. 373 00:12:06,558 --> 00:12:08,158 No, I couldn't do that to Peter. 374 00:12:08,193 --> 00:12:09,903 No, he deserves someone sweet. 375 00:12:09,928 --> 00:12:11,128 He's such a good guy. 376 00:12:11,163 --> 00:12:13,403 It is hard out there for good guys... 377 00:12:13,431 --> 00:12:15,431 because of girls like me. 378 00:12:15,467 --> 00:12:16,997 Yeah. He hasn't dated in a while. 379 00:12:17,035 --> 00:12:19,335 He needs to be eased back in. He needs someone safe 380 00:12:19,371 --> 00:12:22,911 who can gently break the dating seal. 381 00:12:22,941 --> 00:12:24,781 Ew. 382 00:12:24,810 --> 00:12:27,310 Well, why don't you just look for somebody 383 00:12:27,345 --> 00:12:29,545 who's perfectly average. 384 00:12:29,581 --> 00:12:33,021 Just like 5'5", natural hair, no dye, 385 00:12:33,051 --> 00:12:36,791 eyeliner, no shadow, just like, a really sweet, basic bitch 386 00:12:36,822 --> 00:12:39,192 who I would never be friends with. 387 00:12:39,224 --> 00:12:41,364 I hope that's helpful. 388 00:12:41,393 --> 00:12:42,493 MARK: Well, it's been over a day. 389 00:12:42,527 --> 00:12:45,957 Chloe keeps dot-dot-dotting me. 390 00:12:45,997 --> 00:12:47,267 I will not be ghosted. 391 00:12:47,299 --> 00:12:48,969 Okay, Casper. 392 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:52,100 Hey, tell me what you think about this guy. 393 00:12:52,137 --> 00:12:54,267 What? Oh, my God. 394 00:12:52,137 --> 00:12:54,267 It's for Joanna. 395 00:12:54,306 --> 00:12:56,436 So not only are you not going out with Joanna, 396 00:12:56,474 --> 00:12:58,484 but you're hooking her up with some dude? 397 00:12:58,510 --> 00:13:00,480 What is this, like, a terrible reality TV show? 398 00:13:00,512 --> 00:13:03,522 Okay, I know it sounds weird, but... 399 00:13:05,150 --> 00:13:06,520 Uh-huh? 400 00:13:06,551 --> 00:13:08,451 Eh-- Uh-- 401 00:13:08,486 --> 00:13:11,356 I just went along with the pact because... 402 00:13:11,389 --> 00:13:13,559 Because...? 403 00:13:11,389 --> 00:13:13,559 Because... 404 00:13:13,592 --> 00:13:16,932 Because you're a nice guy. Ha, ha! 405 00:13:16,962 --> 00:13:19,832 Yeah! And when a super-hot chick says, "Jump," 406 00:13:19,865 --> 00:13:21,895 a nice guy like you, Peter, is gonna say, 407 00:13:21,933 --> 00:13:23,143 [DEMURELY]: "How high?" 408 00:13:23,168 --> 00:13:24,338 What was I supposed to do? 409 00:13:24,369 --> 00:13:26,239 Leave her hangin'? Or say, 410 00:13:26,271 --> 00:13:29,041 "Hey, we haven't seen each other for 12 years. Be my girlfriend." 411 00:13:29,074 --> 00:13:30,514 Dude, can you get off my back 412 00:13:30,542 --> 00:13:32,482 and just help me swipe for Joanna? 413 00:13:32,510 --> 00:13:34,880 I don't like to check out dudes, no thanks-- Oh, my God! 414 00:13:34,913 --> 00:13:36,523 That dude needs some serious eyebrow fleeking. 415 00:13:36,548 --> 00:13:38,148 He needs to see my guy. 416 00:13:36,548 --> 00:13:38,148 Hm. 417 00:13:38,183 --> 00:13:39,423 What a freak show. 418 00:13:38,183 --> 00:13:39,423 Him? 419 00:13:39,451 --> 00:13:40,991 This guy looks like a serial killer. 420 00:13:41,019 --> 00:13:43,219 What are you doing? Look at that smile. He's like, 421 00:13:43,255 --> 00:13:44,855 "I'm gonna kill you." No. 422 00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:46,560 Okay, I see what you're doing. 423 00:13:46,591 --> 00:13:49,091 You're trying to set her up with the super-sketchy dude. 424 00:13:49,127 --> 00:13:51,857 That way, you look amazing-- No, no, wait. Let me finish. 425 00:13:51,897 --> 00:13:54,597 Peter, this is genius. I like it. Nice. 426 00:13:54,633 --> 00:13:56,503 That's not what I was trying to do at all. 427 00:13:56,534 --> 00:13:59,374 But...it's not a bad idea. 428 00:13:59,404 --> 00:14:01,344 Mm-hm. 429 00:14:01,373 --> 00:14:03,413 Okay, I set her up on a bad date. 430 00:14:03,441 --> 00:14:05,641 Then she'll think I'm awesome in comparison. 431 00:14:05,677 --> 00:14:07,877 Right. 432 00:14:05,677 --> 00:14:07,877 And then we'll go to the diner 433 00:14:07,913 --> 00:14:09,413 and commiserate on our bad dates. 434 00:14:09,447 --> 00:14:11,347 Then we'll call off the pact. 435 00:14:11,383 --> 00:14:13,253 And I will ask her out. 436 00:14:13,285 --> 00:14:15,345 Mm-hm. Yep. I like it. 437 00:14:15,387 --> 00:14:17,087 It only took about five minutes to get there, 438 00:14:17,122 --> 00:14:19,392 but at least you're asking her out. Okay, now, 439 00:14:19,424 --> 00:14:20,934 she's setting you up on a date. 440 00:14:20,959 --> 00:14:23,059 Who's this girl? 441 00:14:20,959 --> 00:14:23,059 I mean, does it matter? 442 00:14:23,094 --> 00:14:25,404 I mean, who can compete with Joanna? I'm sure it'll suck. 443 00:14:25,430 --> 00:14:27,270 That's true. Okay. Awesome. 444 00:14:27,299 --> 00:14:29,129 Now, we just need to find your guy. 445 00:14:29,167 --> 00:14:30,897 Okay. Now, he can't be too awful, 446 00:14:30,936 --> 00:14:32,366 because then she's gonna be onto you. 447 00:14:32,404 --> 00:14:33,614 We need someone right in the middle. 448 00:14:33,638 --> 00:14:36,408 A nice guy. 449 00:14:33,638 --> 00:14:36,408 Decent-looking guy. 450 00:14:36,441 --> 00:14:38,981 But what we need the most is a dud. 451 00:14:39,010 --> 00:14:40,910 Do you have a dud? 452 00:14:40,946 --> 00:14:42,916 I think I have a dud. 453 00:14:42,948 --> 00:14:45,078 To setting each other up. 454 00:14:45,116 --> 00:14:47,446 Cheers. 455 00:14:45,116 --> 00:14:47,446 Cheers. 456 00:14:47,485 --> 00:14:49,045 [BOTH CLEARING THROATS] 457 00:14:49,087 --> 00:14:50,957 Ow, 458 00:14:49,087 --> 00:14:50,957 Aah. 459 00:14:50,989 --> 00:14:53,089 You know, I'm so glad we're doing this. 460 00:14:53,124 --> 00:14:54,434 [EXHALES] 461 00:14:53,124 --> 00:14:54,434 Although, you know, 462 00:14:54,459 --> 00:14:57,429 if this goes poorly, it's your fault. 463 00:14:57,462 --> 00:15:00,232 If it goes amazing, then I get all the credit. 464 00:15:00,265 --> 00:15:03,395 I mean, it's probably not gonna be. 465 00:15:03,435 --> 00:15:05,695 Well-- We should stay positive, right? 466 00:15:05,737 --> 00:15:08,607 Although, you never really do know. 467 00:15:08,640 --> 00:15:11,940 [LAUGHING] What are you... 468 00:15:11,977 --> 00:15:13,477 Um, in any case, 469 00:15:13,511 --> 00:15:15,651 do you wanna meet up at Sunny's afterwards to recap? 470 00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:17,420 Deal. 471 00:15:17,449 --> 00:15:19,349 [♪♪♪] 472 00:15:23,121 --> 00:15:24,291 Joanna, right? 473 00:15:24,322 --> 00:15:25,522 Yeah. 474 00:15:24,322 --> 00:15:25,522 Hi. 475 00:15:25,557 --> 00:15:27,157 I'm Todd. 476 00:15:25,557 --> 00:15:27,157 Hey, good to meet you. 477 00:15:27,192 --> 00:15:29,662 Yeah, nice to meet you too. 478 00:15:29,694 --> 00:15:32,264 All right. 479 00:15:32,297 --> 00:15:34,267 Nice one, Peter. 480 00:15:34,299 --> 00:15:36,439 [♪♪♪] 481 00:15:41,606 --> 00:15:44,436 Peter? Hey. 482 00:15:44,476 --> 00:15:46,206 Oh, hi. 483 00:15:44,476 --> 00:15:46,206 I'm sorry. No, please sit. 484 00:15:46,244 --> 00:15:47,714 I'm really sweaty, heh. Um... 485 00:15:47,746 --> 00:15:49,716 Nice to meet you. I'm gonna use the restroom, 486 00:15:49,748 --> 00:15:51,148 and I'll be right back. 487 00:15:49,748 --> 00:15:51,148 Okay. 488 00:15:51,182 --> 00:15:52,992 Okay. 489 00:16:01,326 --> 00:16:03,296 I'm a personal trainer. 490 00:16:03,328 --> 00:16:05,328 Oh, cool. Yeah. 491 00:16:05,363 --> 00:16:09,003 I, uh, love gyms. 492 00:16:05,363 --> 00:16:09,003 Oh. 493 00:16:09,034 --> 00:16:11,144 And you also like to lie a little bit, 494 00:16:11,169 --> 00:16:12,469 don't you? 495 00:16:12,504 --> 00:16:14,314 I hate working out, actually. 496 00:16:14,339 --> 00:16:16,309 No, seriously, 497 00:16:16,341 --> 00:16:17,681 I had a really stressful job in finance, 498 00:16:17,709 --> 00:16:20,209 and my getaway was to work out. 499 00:16:20,245 --> 00:16:22,175 And then one day, I quit my job 500 00:16:22,213 --> 00:16:24,323 and started pursuing something that I love. 501 00:16:24,349 --> 00:16:26,319 That is awesome. And I know how you feel 502 00:16:26,351 --> 00:16:28,221 because I was in finance for the past, 503 00:16:28,253 --> 00:16:29,593 like, eight or nine years. 504 00:16:29,621 --> 00:16:31,261 And I feel like, in finance, 505 00:16:31,289 --> 00:16:34,059 my diet consisted of Cinnabons and Mountain Dew. 506 00:16:34,092 --> 00:16:37,062 Yeah, I lived off of frozen pizza and Red Bull. 507 00:16:37,095 --> 00:16:39,255 But you must eat much healthier now, I'm assuming. 508 00:16:39,297 --> 00:16:42,197 See, not exactly, but my clients, right? They come in, 509 00:16:42,233 --> 00:16:44,503 and they always wanna know the newest fad diet. 510 00:16:44,536 --> 00:16:46,036 Right. 511 00:16:44,536 --> 00:16:46,036 One of the guys came in, 512 00:16:46,071 --> 00:16:48,111 and I completely played a prank on him, 513 00:16:48,139 --> 00:16:50,409 and told him to go on the Peelio diet. 514 00:16:50,442 --> 00:16:52,182 You mean, Paleo diet. 515 00:16:52,210 --> 00:16:53,410 No. Peelio. 516 00:16:53,445 --> 00:16:54,775 I literally convinced this guy 517 00:16:54,813 --> 00:16:56,353 to only eat foods that he can peel, 518 00:16:56,381 --> 00:16:57,681 so he was eating bananas, shrimp, 519 00:16:57,715 --> 00:16:59,515 and like, hard-boiled eggs. 520 00:16:59,551 --> 00:17:02,591 Wow, that's amazing. Ha, ha! 521 00:17:02,620 --> 00:17:05,760 Sorry about that. There's a bit of a situation. 522 00:17:05,790 --> 00:17:07,730 Lots of blood, but don't worry. 523 00:17:07,759 --> 00:17:09,189 The little guy's fine now. 524 00:17:09,227 --> 00:17:11,357 Uh, "lots of blood"? 525 00:17:11,396 --> 00:17:12,696 "Little guy"? 526 00:17:11,396 --> 00:17:12,696 You don't know what I do? 527 00:17:12,730 --> 00:17:15,300 You must think I'm insane. 528 00:17:15,333 --> 00:17:18,103 I'm doing my residency at L.A. Children's Hospital right now. 529 00:17:18,136 --> 00:17:19,636 Oh, I-I had no idea. 530 00:17:19,671 --> 00:17:21,711 You know, that's a-- That's a bold icebreaker. 531 00:17:21,739 --> 00:17:24,809 Can't say I didn't make an impression. 532 00:17:26,611 --> 00:17:28,111 Oh, wow. 533 00:17:28,146 --> 00:17:29,306 I don't know what to get. 534 00:17:29,347 --> 00:17:30,617 I want everything on the menu. 535 00:17:30,648 --> 00:17:33,218 Yep. It all looks good. 536 00:17:33,251 --> 00:17:35,391 So you said you didn't know what I did. 537 00:17:35,420 --> 00:17:36,790 I'm guessing you didn't Google me? 538 00:17:36,821 --> 00:17:38,221 [CHUCKLES] 539 00:17:38,256 --> 00:17:39,856 I came in blind. 540 00:17:39,891 --> 00:17:41,261 Wow. 541 00:17:41,292 --> 00:17:42,732 That's super refreshing. 542 00:17:42,760 --> 00:17:44,660 It's nice to let things unfold organically. 543 00:17:44,696 --> 00:17:47,696 In real life, you know? 544 00:17:47,732 --> 00:17:50,402 Yeah, it is. 545 00:17:54,339 --> 00:17:56,169 Hey. 546 00:17:56,207 --> 00:17:58,807 [SIGHS] What are you doing here in person? 547 00:17:58,843 --> 00:18:01,183 Look, Chloe, we... 548 00:18:01,212 --> 00:18:03,182 We can't connect through a screen protector. 549 00:18:03,214 --> 00:18:05,584 There's a reason why I haven't been texting you back, okay? 550 00:18:05,617 --> 00:18:07,547 Good night. 551 00:18:05,617 --> 00:18:07,547 Whoa. Okay, look. 552 00:18:07,585 --> 00:18:09,445 I will not be ghosted. 553 00:18:09,487 --> 00:18:11,417 I know IRL can be uncomfortable, 554 00:18:11,456 --> 00:18:14,826 but I decided it's worth being uncomfortable because I-- 555 00:18:16,861 --> 00:18:18,301 I missed you. 556 00:18:19,764 --> 00:18:22,734 So I came to see you. 557 00:18:22,767 --> 00:18:24,797 [SCOFFS] 558 00:18:24,836 --> 00:18:27,836 No guy's ever shown up for me IRL before. 559 00:18:27,872 --> 00:18:30,782 It's fairly creepy, but... 560 00:18:30,808 --> 00:18:33,148 it's also kind of sweet. 561 00:18:33,178 --> 00:18:35,278 I-- Well, I didn't think it was, like, that creepy. 562 00:18:35,313 --> 00:18:37,383 But, yeah, go-- 563 00:18:37,415 --> 00:18:39,275 [♪♪♪] 564 00:18:41,319 --> 00:18:42,749 Who you gonna call? 565 00:18:42,787 --> 00:18:45,157 Don't-- No, don't. 566 00:18:42,787 --> 00:18:45,157 Ghost-- 567 00:18:45,190 --> 00:18:48,390 Really? I thought maybe-- Okay. 568 00:18:45,190 --> 00:18:48,390 No, don't do that. 569 00:18:48,426 --> 00:18:50,556 Two brothers and one sister. 570 00:18:50,595 --> 00:18:51,595 Yourself? 571 00:18:51,629 --> 00:18:53,699 Only child. 572 00:18:51,629 --> 00:18:53,699 Ah! 573 00:18:53,731 --> 00:18:55,871 That's the best. I mean, all the attention's on you. 574 00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:58,400 No, that's the worst! All the attention's on you. 575 00:18:58,436 --> 00:18:59,696 [CHUCKLES] 576 00:18:59,737 --> 00:19:01,507 No, you know, being part of a big family, 577 00:19:01,539 --> 00:19:03,909 I always imagined myself with, like, at least two kids. 578 00:19:03,942 --> 00:19:07,582 You? 579 00:19:03,942 --> 00:19:07,582 Ah, you know, I'm just... 580 00:19:07,612 --> 00:19:09,582 hopin' to get married first. 581 00:19:09,614 --> 00:19:12,824 Wait. You really never thought about how many kids you want? 582 00:19:12,850 --> 00:19:15,290 I mean, for me, I always imagined two boys 583 00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:17,490 growing up with each other, always being there, 584 00:19:17,522 --> 00:19:18,762 and then comes the youngest, 585 00:19:18,790 --> 00:19:20,860 the girl. So as she grows up, 586 00:19:20,892 --> 00:19:22,732 she has two brothers that look over her. 587 00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:24,560 Wow. 588 00:19:24,596 --> 00:19:28,496 That sounds like one big happy family. 589 00:19:28,533 --> 00:19:30,203 ♪ Na na na na ♪ 590 00:19:30,235 --> 00:19:31,865 So your dating profile said you work in apparel? 591 00:19:31,903 --> 00:19:34,743 Yeah. I work for my parents. 592 00:19:34,772 --> 00:19:37,682 Mainly kids apparel. It's not that exciting. 593 00:19:37,709 --> 00:19:40,249 But that's awesome. You get to see your family all the time. 594 00:19:40,278 --> 00:19:42,678 You grow up here in L.A.? 595 00:19:40,278 --> 00:19:42,678 Born and raised. 596 00:19:42,714 --> 00:19:45,284 Ah. Super jealous of your childhood. 597 00:19:45,316 --> 00:19:48,546 I mean, you had the beach and Disneyland. 598 00:19:48,586 --> 00:19:50,516 Still a season pass holder. 599 00:19:48,586 --> 00:19:50,516 Oh, Peter, 600 00:19:50,555 --> 00:19:51,955 I don't know how to break it to you, 601 00:19:51,990 --> 00:19:54,290 but you don't need a pass for the beach. 602 00:19:54,325 --> 00:19:58,725 [CHUCKLES] Oh, okay, thanks for the tip. 603 00:19:58,763 --> 00:20:00,573 So, uh, how about you? 604 00:20:00,598 --> 00:20:02,368 I grew up on the East Coast, 605 00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:04,640 and then I came out here for school and never left. 606 00:20:04,669 --> 00:20:06,869 The weather too good, right? 607 00:20:04,669 --> 00:20:06,869 [CHUCKLES] 608 00:20:06,904 --> 00:20:08,714 Sure. 609 00:20:08,740 --> 00:20:10,610 But I feel like if you've lived in L.A. 610 00:20:10,642 --> 00:20:12,242 for longer than three years, 611 00:20:12,277 --> 00:20:13,847 and you still say the weather's the best part, 612 00:20:13,878 --> 00:20:15,948 you have not had Korean barbecue, 613 00:20:15,980 --> 00:20:18,780 and you've not been Downtown. 614 00:20:15,980 --> 00:20:18,780 I 100 percent agree with that. 615 00:20:18,816 --> 00:20:20,716 I mean, people always give me a hard time 616 00:20:20,752 --> 00:20:22,622 for never leaving my hometown, 617 00:20:22,654 --> 00:20:24,724 but it's L.A. I mean, we have everything here. 618 00:20:24,756 --> 00:20:26,556 Yeah. Except for sane people. 619 00:20:26,591 --> 00:20:27,791 [CHUCKLING] Wait, what? 620 00:20:27,825 --> 00:20:30,255 The dating scene here? 621 00:20:27,825 --> 00:20:30,255 Oh. 622 00:20:30,295 --> 00:20:33,625 It's really hard to meet someone genuine, someone real. 623 00:20:33,665 --> 00:20:35,925 Well, maybe because we all grew up goin' to Disneyland. 624 00:20:35,967 --> 00:20:38,297 [LAUGHS] 625 00:20:40,605 --> 00:20:43,405 Should we get another drink? 626 00:20:43,441 --> 00:20:45,441 Yeah. Sure. 627 00:20:47,045 --> 00:20:49,745 [CLEARS THROAT] 628 00:20:47,045 --> 00:20:49,745 You know, I was just about to 629 00:20:49,781 --> 00:20:51,381 get off this whole dating app thing, 630 00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:52,946 but... you're the first person I've met 631 00:20:52,984 --> 00:20:54,954 who hasn't made me wanna take a fake phone call. 632 00:20:54,986 --> 00:20:56,886 Oh, there's-- There's still time for that. 633 00:20:56,921 --> 00:20:58,521 [LAUGHS] 634 00:20:58,556 --> 00:21:02,586 To be honest, this has been fun. 635 00:21:02,627 --> 00:21:05,327 "You miss a hundred percent of the shots you don't take." 636 00:21:05,363 --> 00:21:07,633 Ugh, that's so cheesy. 637 00:21:07,665 --> 00:21:08,865 Sorry. I just... 638 00:21:08,900 --> 00:21:10,470 I played a lot of sports growing up. 639 00:21:10,501 --> 00:21:12,941 No, no, no, that-- That was my senior quote. 640 00:21:12,970 --> 00:21:14,770 [LAUGHS] 641 00:21:12,970 --> 00:21:14,770 JOANNA: Well, yeah, 642 00:21:14,806 --> 00:21:16,676 it started out great, and then... 643 00:21:16,708 --> 00:21:18,408 He got weird? 644 00:21:16,708 --> 00:21:18,408 No. 645 00:21:18,443 --> 00:21:20,553 I don't know. He-- You know, he's nice 646 00:21:20,578 --> 00:21:22,478 and cute, but... 647 00:21:22,513 --> 00:21:24,483 I don't know, maybe it just wasn't there for me. 648 00:21:24,515 --> 00:21:26,475 There had to have been something wrong with him. 649 00:21:26,517 --> 00:21:28,087 He was, like, talking about kids at one point. 650 00:21:28,119 --> 00:21:29,989 That seemed a little quick. 651 00:21:28,119 --> 00:21:29,989 I mean, 652 00:21:30,021 --> 00:21:32,321 at this age, it's kind of fair game to talk about. 653 00:21:32,357 --> 00:21:34,887 I mean, is the goal of the pact to get married, or do you just 654 00:21:34,926 --> 00:21:37,326 not wanna be single, or...? 655 00:21:34,926 --> 00:21:37,326 You know what... 656 00:21:37,362 --> 00:21:39,902 maybe the pact's too confusing. Maybe I should just call it off. 657 00:21:39,931 --> 00:21:42,771 What? Yesterday, you were all in. What happened? 658 00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:45,340 I don't know. I thought the whole point of this was to just, 659 00:21:45,370 --> 00:21:48,340 you know, be in the trenches with Peter, goin' on dates, 660 00:21:48,373 --> 00:21:50,683 but I just wanna find a meaningful relationship. 661 00:21:50,708 --> 00:21:52,878 You do realize in order to find a meaningful relationship, 662 00:21:52,910 --> 00:21:54,510 you will have to go on dates. 663 00:21:54,545 --> 00:21:56,005 Your plan seems a little flawed. 664 00:21:56,047 --> 00:21:57,917 All I know is that I'm having 665 00:21:57,949 --> 00:21:59,549 way more fun hanging out with Peter 666 00:21:59,584 --> 00:22:01,024 than going on all these dates. 667 00:22:01,052 --> 00:22:03,722 When he gets here, I'm gonna call it off. 668 00:22:03,755 --> 00:22:07,825 Uh... so quick question. Is your ex named 669 00:22:07,859 --> 00:22:09,759 Carl Ditani, and is he 670 00:22:09,794 --> 00:22:11,964 getting married to an Allison Apticure? 671 00:22:11,996 --> 00:22:13,826 Yeah, why? 672 00:22:13,865 --> 00:22:17,565 Uh, a little crazy... I'm doing their wedding. 673 00:22:17,602 --> 00:22:20,372 What? 674 00:22:17,602 --> 00:22:20,372 But I totally can 675 00:22:20,405 --> 00:22:23,005 mess with them. You know, like, do they have any allergies? 676 00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:25,140 No, heh. You know, you don't have to do that. 677 00:22:25,176 --> 00:22:26,946 Are you sure? 'Cause you don't know 678 00:22:26,978 --> 00:22:28,648 what I can do with tulips. 679 00:22:28,679 --> 00:22:30,719 You're crazy. Um, Peter just got here. I gotta go. 680 00:22:30,748 --> 00:22:32,418 I'm gonna tell him. Okay? Bye. 681 00:22:32,450 --> 00:22:33,850 [PHONE DISCONNECTS] 682 00:22:33,885 --> 00:22:36,585 Whoa. Sorry I'm late. 683 00:22:36,621 --> 00:22:37,861 It went longer than expected. 684 00:22:37,889 --> 00:22:39,889 Ah! So did I pick a winner? 685 00:22:39,924 --> 00:22:41,464 Actually, she was pretty great. 686 00:22:41,492 --> 00:22:43,702 Yeah? 687 00:22:41,492 --> 00:22:43,702 Yeah, yeah. 688 00:22:43,728 --> 00:22:45,098 I mean, I was a little worried 689 00:22:45,129 --> 00:22:48,399 when she showed up 15 minutes late and sweaty, 690 00:22:48,433 --> 00:22:51,073 but it turns out that she was a doctor. 691 00:22:51,102 --> 00:22:53,142 And we had fun getting to know each other. 692 00:22:53,171 --> 00:22:55,571 Nice. Well, I'm happy to hear that. 693 00:22:55,606 --> 00:22:57,876 How about you? How was Todd? 694 00:22:57,909 --> 00:23:00,709 Um, he was all right. Um... 695 00:23:00,745 --> 00:23:03,575 Really easy to talk to. 696 00:23:03,614 --> 00:23:06,424 Mainly because he did most of the talking. 697 00:23:06,451 --> 00:23:08,051 So you think you'll see him again? 698 00:23:08,085 --> 00:23:09,715 I don't know. 699 00:23:09,754 --> 00:23:11,894 I mean, I don't know that he's for me, 700 00:23:11,923 --> 00:23:14,093 but...maybe. We'll see. 701 00:23:14,125 --> 00:23:15,625 [INHALES] 702 00:23:15,660 --> 00:23:17,900 What about you and Sarah? 703 00:23:17,929 --> 00:23:19,899 I don't know. 704 00:23:19,931 --> 00:23:21,731 I haven't thought about it yet. 705 00:23:21,766 --> 00:23:23,666 [CELL PHONE BUZZES] 706 00:23:23,701 --> 00:23:25,801 Top 10 rides at Disneyland. 707 00:23:25,837 --> 00:23:27,467 Oh, this is for you. 708 00:23:27,505 --> 00:23:28,905 It's from the app. 709 00:23:28,940 --> 00:23:30,510 Oh, that's hilarious. 710 00:23:30,541 --> 00:23:31,811 It's from Sarah. 711 00:23:31,843 --> 00:23:33,653 We kind of bonded over Disneyland. 712 00:23:33,678 --> 00:23:35,448 Oh, okay, California Screamin' 713 00:23:35,480 --> 00:23:37,180 should not be that high on the list. 714 00:23:37,215 --> 00:23:40,485 Oh, my God, I'm sorry. Uh, I should sign off here. 715 00:23:40,518 --> 00:23:41,648 This app. 716 00:23:44,121 --> 00:23:46,791 Well, it seems like you guys had a really good time. 717 00:23:46,824 --> 00:23:48,494 I feel like you should see her again. 718 00:23:48,526 --> 00:23:49,686 Really? 719 00:23:49,727 --> 00:23:51,457 Yeah. I mean, why not? 720 00:23:51,496 --> 00:23:52,956 That's what the pact is about, right? 721 00:23:52,997 --> 00:23:56,167 Yeah. I guess so. 722 00:23:56,200 --> 00:23:58,000 It's funny. 723 00:23:58,035 --> 00:24:01,235 Part of me wanted to call off the pact tonight. 724 00:24:01,272 --> 00:24:04,012 But, like Sarah said, 725 00:24:04,041 --> 00:24:08,111 "You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take." 726 00:24:09,947 --> 00:24:11,647 Yep. 727 00:24:11,682 --> 00:24:13,622 That's right. 728 00:24:16,587 --> 00:24:18,957 [♪♪♪] 47371

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