All language subtitles for Head.Of.The.Class.S04E01_2

[theme music]

- Ms. Meara?
- 'Yeah?'

Did you watch "America's
Most Wanted" last night?

No, no, I-I watched
"Wuthering Heights."

Yeah, well, last night
on "America's Most Wanted"

they did a thing
on this masked murderer.

The Idaho hiker hacker.
Ten victims.

- They showed a picture.
- So?

Well, call me crazy

but it looked
like Charlie Moore!

Oh, please!

Morning.

Something wrong?

No! Oh, no. No, no. No.

Here's the info on the new kids
in your honors class.

Aha-ha! Fresh blood.

I don't wanna hear it,
I don't wanna hear it.

I don't wanna hear it!

- Hi, everybody. Welcome back.
- Hey, Mr. Moore.

- How was your summer?
- I had a great summer.

- 'Oh, good!'
- And you?

Oh, we were just talking about
what we did this summer.

Yeah, uh, Sugar Loaf
Writers' Project, huh?

- Was it great?
- Oh, great.

- Let me tell you what she did.
- What I did?

Mr. Moore,
let me tell you what he did.

Well, let me tell you
what I did.

Among other things,
I took a solemn vow

not to be involved
in your love life.

- Hi, guys.
- Gross!

- Arvid!
- Arvid!

(Arvid)
I went to math camp.

I'm allergic to air.

[gasping]
Dennis!

What?

Uh, Dennis worked in
a pizza parlor over the summer

and he accidentally ate a few.

Gee, Dennis,
maybe you should consider

going to a weight-loss center.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

Maybe you can get a group rate.

Eric, that's not gonna help.

No, no, no, Mr. Moore,
it's okay.

Actually, I've gotten to the
point where I like fat jokes.

I mean, they're funny,
they're clever

and they're about me.

In fact, I have gotten so fat,
when I step on a scale, it says

"One at a time, please."

Dennis, you know,
I don't believe for one moment

that you actually enjoy
being the butt..

Oh, my butt's so big,
I could moon Europe.

...of your own jokes.

I'm tellin' you, it's okay!

Everybody knows fat people
don't have feelings. Right?

Well, additionally, you should
be concerned about your health.

Dennis, I hate
what you're doing to yourself.

I mean, you're starting
to violate building codes.

[mumbles]
T-that's not what I mean.

I-I'm not trying to say
that you..

You could sing "We Are
The World" all by yourself.

No, no, no.
No, let me put it another way!

- Alright!
- "Alright" what?

Alright, I'll lose the weight.

Good, Dennis,
you gotta commit yourself.

Now.

- 'Oh!'
- 'Oh, my God!'

Whoo!

- Oh, oh, my!
- Dennis, look at you! Whoa!

- 'Dennis!'
- 'Dennis, you look great!'

- Gee, Dennis, you're so thin!
- Yeah.

Yeah, in fact, you're so thin--

L-leave it alone, Eric.
Leave it alone.

Hey, I figured if Oprah Winfrey
can do it, why not me?

Oh, Dennis, I'm so proud of you.

[indistinct chatter]

Hi. Can I help you?

- Is this honors history?
- Yeah.

- You're Mr. Moore, right?
- Yeah.

- I'm Alex Torres. I'm new.
- Ah.

Uh, listen up, everybody.

[Moore clears throat]

I am gonna love it here.

[school bell ringing]

Okay, while you're sitting down

I have some announcements
to make.

Uh, Mr. Moore,
where's Jawaharlal?

Well, that's
one of the announcements.

Um, Jawaharlal's family
has moved to California.

'Business opportunities.'

I'm sure
we all wish him well, huh?

[indistinct chatter]

Now, this is Al Torres.

And he's gonna be joining us.

And, uh, why don't you just
take center stage

and tell us
all about yourself, Al?

Sure. Um..

My name is Alex Torres.
My friends call me Alex.

Nobody calls me Al. Okay?

I've been going
to parochial school all my life.

Nice people, great education,
but all boys.

See, this is my senior year.

I mean, that's eleven years
without girls.

'So I said to my mother, I said,
"Ma, please'

I wanna go to a public school."

She says, "No,
you go to parochial school.

No drugs, no fights
and you go to mass every day."

I said, "But, ma," I said

"There's nobody pretty
to look at.

'"No one in silky clothes
with soft skin'

'who smells good."'

And she says, "No." I say,
"Ma, please!" She says, "No!"

I said, "Ma, please?"
She says, "No!"

I said, "Ma, it's free."

She says, "Okay, only
if you get into honors class."

So here I am and, uh,
it looks great already.

Well, I'm sure we're all glad

to have you with us, Al...ex.

Hm. Thanks.

Wait a minute, Mr. Moore,
where's Janice?

- Yeah.
- 'Oh, yeah.'

Harvard.

- Harvard?
- Harvard?

Janice and her parents decided

that she'd accomplished enough
here

so she's moved on to college.

Oh. Do you know what this means?

It means
when I'm a freshman at Harvard

Janice will be a sophomore.

She's a sophomore now.

Little Janice is gone?

Well, I can still see her
sitting next to Darlene.

Mm, yeah. I wanna cry.

- I want her seat.
- Okay.

You know,
I-I saw you were lookin' at me.

Believe me,
I was not looking at you.

Excuse me, Mr. Moore,
Maria's not here.

- I'm aware of that, Alan.
- Didn't you hear, Alan?

Maria got accepted to the high
school for the performing arts.

Maria decided
she was born to sing.

I don't believe it.

T.J., you finally found somebody
with worse hair than yours.

You look good, Dennis.

Now try a new personality.

Ah, T.J.

- Hi, Mr. Moore.
- Hi.

- This here is Aristotle.
- Right.

Aristotle, uh, "McKenzie."

How many Aristotles
you got in here?

Well, it's just that
we've got a Socrates McKenzie

and a Plato McKenzie, so..

You passed. I like that.

[chuckles]

Thank you, T.J.

- Uh, he's late.
- Yes, I know.

So what you're gonna do
about it?

Boil 'em.

- Thank you.
- Oh, I see.

Anybody and his uncle can get
into this class, except me.

T.J., I'm sure that Dr. Samuels
is wondering where you are.

Well, he knows I'm not
in the IHP, that's for sure.

And who's he?

This is Alex Torres.
He's a new student.

Another one?

[scoffs]
Uh, you got a problem?

Beautiful girls,
they're everywhere.

I mean, it's unbelievable.

Are you flirting with me?

- Yeah, I guess I am.
- Oh. Whoo-hoo.

Well, Aristotle,
according to this

you transferred from Performing
Arts High School. Why?

My mom said, "Get a life."
She said, "Do something real."

Like, a doctor
or a lawyer or somethin'

so I gotta do this and I gotta
do college to make her happy.

Well, what makes you happy?

Oh, film making, writing,
acting, painting.

Really? Well, uh, keeping up
in here makes me happy.

I'll keep up. I'll fit right in.

- Good. And you'll be on time.
- Oh, I can explain that.

See, I listen
to this radio station

uh, WRAP in the mornin'.

Two tunes
and I'm havin' breakfast

two more
and I'm out the door..

Hey, that's cool!

♪ Tune number five
I'm on Riverside Drive ♪

♪ I won't be late
if I'm here by tune eight ♪♪

Yeah!

Unfortunately, my mother changed
the radio to a opera station.

Yeah, those songs are really
long, so it kinda set me back.

Well, you'd make an opera from
this riff if you had a chance

but to me, it sounds like
the same old song and dance.

♪ So why don't you chill out
and sit yourself down? ♪

♪ We can start the class
no more messin' around ♪

♪ Shick-shick shi-shi-shick
whoo-whoo ♪♪

[cheering]

Alright, I'm real excited
about this year

'and I know we're gonna have
a lot of fun, but..'

Uh, excuse me, Al.

It's Alex.

It's Eric and that's
my girlfriend, Simone.

- Eric, please.
- Oh, yeah, Eric, please.

- Al, Al, Al, Al, Al--
- Eric, Eric, Eric.

Al, Al, Al, Alex!

'Alex, Eric, Alex.'

- 'Hey, she's really--'
- 'Wait, you two.'

Hi!

Hi.

- Hi. Eric. How you doin'?
- Alright.

- Welcome. Alex.
- Mr. Moore.

Boy, I sense
a lot of positive energy.

I think I'm gonna like it here.

- 'Good.'
- Good.

Thank you, gentlemen.

- And you are?
- Oh. Viki Amory.

Right. Well, welcome, Viki,
come on in.

Uh, everybody, this is Viki.

- V-I-K-I.
- Right.

[chuckles]
Of course, it's right.

I should know
how to spell my own name.

[laughing]

Since that is all
we know about you, Viki

how you spell your name

why don't you, uh,
tell us some more?

Oh, well, my father was
transferred here from Florida

so here I am.

Great, beautiful!

- Marvelous!
- Wonderful!

- 'Marvelous.'
- Wonderful!

You know, uh, uh

I-I'm sure
that everyone is curious

about your other interests.

You know, hobbies,
things like that.

- Oh!
- Right, girls?

Well, I'm really into health

and new-age things
like crystals and channeling.

That's fascinating!

- You know, I read--
- Arvid, shut up.

Go ahead, Viki.

Oh, and animal rights.

I mean, animals are people, too,
aren't they?

- Oh! Absolutely.
- That's wonderful.

That's what I'm talkin' about.

Um, Viki, among your hobbies,
I noticed

you left out nuclear physics.

Oh, that was last year.
Now I'm kinda into quantum.

You know, like, wave-particle
duality, stuff like that.

Wait a minute.

You mean, like, uh,
Feynman diagrams

and the Heisenberg
uncertainty principle?

Are you kidding? I love junk
like that. It's my main thing.

[chuckles]

Junk like that's
my main thing, too.

- That's great. Really?
- Yeah, really.

[chuckles]
I-it's my main thing, too,
you know?

Fellows, fellows!

Listen,
history is my main thing, okay?

And I love sharing it with you.

So sit! Okay?

Yeah, Viki, you can sit here.

- Thanks.
- If I may..

Boy, this is a cute class.

Well, we try.

[chuckles]

Now, uh, first semester

we're gonna focus
on the cause and effect--

Here are the nutritional
reports

and your revised
attendance record.

And where did you come from?

Florida.

- You in the honors program?
- I guess so, yeah.

That's it, no more talking

no more begging,
no more pleading.

No more writing new essays
to impress you.

I'm sitting right here
until they let me in this class.

- Aw..
- T.J..

This is not the way
to deal with this problem.

- Oh, yes, it is!
- No.

- It isn't.
- Yes, it is!

- Excuse me, Mr. Moore.
- What?

I want you to understand
this is nothing personal.

I'm only doing in all conscience
what I must do

as principal of this school.

- And as a citizen.
- What?

I'm sure everything
will check out just fine!

What?

I was watching this, uh, TV show

"America's Most Wanted."

Well, I, I wrestled
with my conscience

and then I picked up the phone.

There's a gentleman in my office
from the police department.

He would like to ask you
a few questions

about a few, uh, dead campers.

What?

There is no way
Mr. Moore killed anybody.

[indistinct chatter]

I like this better
than my old school.

I mean,
they hardly ever arrest nuns.

[laughs]

First day in remedial

they arrested my whole row, mm.

Oh, I don't wanna hear this.

It's obviously a big mix-up.

- 'Yeah.'
- Oh, yeah?

What do you people really know
about this Mr. Moore character?

Enough to know
that he did not kill anybody.

- That's right.
- Yeah.

Our Mr. Moore
wouldn't hurt a fly.

- Nope.
- This guy didn't hurt flies.

He hacked people to death
in their tents.

Well, they should've stayed
in hotels.

Well, he looked like
a nice-enough guy

but I guess you never know, huh?

No! No, we know!

Look, this is our class
and Mr. Moore is our teacher

so don't start accusing him
of murder!

- Yeah!
- Yeah!

Hey, the man's just saying
keep an open mind.

You new people
come charging in here

condemning Mr. Moore.
Who do you think you are?

- 'Yeah!'
- 'Really.'

I'm Viki Amory.
I come from Florida and--

She doesn't mean who are you.

She means who are you.

Viki Amory. I come from--

(all)
We know!

She's in this class and I'm not?

Man, you new kids
have a lotta nerve

comin' in here
talkin' trash about Mr. Moore.

Who is T.J. to talk about us?

She doesn't even belong
in this class. Is that correct?

- 'Yes, she does!'
- 'Yeah.'

Well, if I gotta look
like a Muppet to get in here.

[indistinct chatter]

Okay, uh, once again

for the new students in class
and for the old students

who may be wondering

my name is Charlie Moore.

I am not the Idaho hiker hacker.

- Told you!
- See?

That's good 'cause my mother
would never let me go

on one of your field trips.

[laughs]

Well, I promise you

my exam on the 16th Amendment
is a killer.

Hey, I know that one.
That's the income tax.

That's the amendment
that introduced

the federal income tax, right?

Oh, you forgot
to tell us the year.

1913. Don't mess with me
on the Constitution.

I got it covered.

Well, aren't you just ready
for "Final Jeopardy?"

- What for?
- Look, uh..

You boys
seem to have a problem here.

So why don't we get it out
in the open now?

They've been doing numbers on
each other ever since you left.

[laughs]
And you're still here.

Yeah! I'm still here.
And I've had it, see?

'Cause, like,
I'm here to get an education

not waste my time
bickering with people

who are too stupid to put aside
their personal differences

and start learnin' somethin'.

So go ahead, Mr. Moore, teach.

I-I believe you were gonna start
with an overview?

Okay, point one of my overview.

You are not a member
of this class.

- But, Mr. Moore, I've tried--
- No, no, look!

I'd like to have you in here,
I like you, T.J.

but there are
certain requirements

you've yet to fulfil.

- Name one.
- You're still in remedial.

So? I'm in remedial.

Is that supposed to haunt me
for the rest of my life?

What is this? "Les Miserables?"

(Charlie)
Look.

You wanna be in this class,
seriously

you get out of remedial,
you get into regular classes

you maintain an A-average
for two months.

- A-average? Huh. I can do that.
- Well..

No cutting classes,
no discipline problems.

Hey, relax, everybody. I think
she'll blow it on attitude.

- Now listen here.
- Oh..

Thank you so much
for your interest.

And please..

...have a nice day.

Save my seat.

Actually, I have something.

I want you to go upstairs
to the camera club.

You know, Ms. Schraff
runs the photography department.

Get me a camera
with a flash unit and some film.

- What for?
- I'm gonna take a picture.

Oh.

[scoffs]
Nice move, Mr. Moore.

I mean, let's face it,
she does not belong in here.

Whoa, slow down, senator.

T.J.'s smart, she's interesting
and I know she'll work hard.

I mean, why shouldn't she have
the chance to be in this class?

Why? You have to ask why?

Because we have standards,
that's why.

- 'Well..'
- Excellent point.

- Oh, Dennis!
- If we start..

If we start letting anybody in..

Excuse me.

- Hello?
- You don't know..

Now, this isn't really
about T.J. being in this class.

- Is it?
- No.

No, I guess it's not.

Well?

[chuckles]

It's our class, Mr. Moore.

It was our class
even before you were here.

And now three of us are gone
and three strangers are here.

Well, I'm not accustomed
to using such language

but I guess
we're all just freaking.

Mr. Moore, we were a unit

a team of really together,
academic over-achievers.

And all of a sudden
three of our friends are gone

and we're sitting here
next to la bamba and la bimbo.

And an extra
from "Do The Right Thing."

Okay. Now listen to me.

Janice and Jawaharlal,
and Maria have moved on

for their own reasons
and we accept that.

Now we have three new students
and we should accept them.

- Can I say something?
- 'Sure.'

This ain't your class.

I mean,
this is a public high school

in the city of New York

a municipality
to which my parents pay taxes

which, by the way, pays for his
salary, your books and her desk.

I mean, I've passed all
the tests, got all the grades.

And I belong here
just as much as anybody.

And by the way,
so does he and so does she.

I mean, it's a privilege to be
in here, but you don't own it.

- Sorry, Mr. Moore.
- No, no, go on.

Well, it's important for me
to be in this class.

I got a lot of things
I wanna achieve.

Yeah, her, her and her.

That's not why I'm in here.

I'm in here
because my parents can't afford

parochial school anymore

and I need to be
in a good school.

I mean, I wanna go on
and become an archeologist.

I-I wanna study
ancient civilizations

a-and I wanna go to Machu Pichu

Stonehenge a-and Easter Island.

That is a great idea. Go now!

Look, I'm here
and I'm stayin' here.

And if you guys don't like it,
well, that's too bad.

And if you girls don't like it

well, I think
I'll have to kill myself.

I have to add my voice to this.

[scoffs]
I'd be surprised if you didn't.

Thank you.

I love this.

The hostility, the clash
between the old and the new..

...the love triangle..

...the Idaho hiker hacker. Yeah.

- Get to the point.
- 'Yeah.'

I'm an artist.

I need tension,
polarity, conflict.

I need to suffer.
You know what I mean?

I'm saying...I love you

for hating me with open arms.

[Moore chuckles]

Well, thank you, Aristotle.
That was refreshing.

Oh. Is it my turn
to say something?

Yes, but you don't have to.

Oh, okay, thanks.

Okay.

Well, I trust we all see--

I think
that it's our collective karma

that's brought us here together

at this moment in time
on this our planet Earth.

To experience together

whatever it is
we're supposed to experience.

And I've had a lot of experience
with the experience.

My family moves around
all the time.

I'm always the new kid in class.

The boys always like me,
but for some reason

the girls don't.

But just when everybody
finally gets to know the real me

it's time for me to move on
to my next experience.

So just this once,
I'd like to make friends early

so that I could enjoy
the experience

before I leave the experience..

...for another experience.

Well, thank you, Viki.

Uh, Aristotle, Alex,
you all spoke eloquently.

Certainly from the heart.

You know,
I-I was once new in this class

and these people
made me feel quite welcome..

...eventually.

I'm sure that given a chance
they'll do the same for you.

I would like to say something.

Welcome to our class.

- Ha-ha-ha.
- Alright.

- You, too. Welcome.
- Cool.

And to you,
I would like to extend

a really big,
traditional IHP welcome.

- 'Yeow.'
- Boo!

- Thanks.
- Eric's got the right idea.

Welcome.

Hey!

Isn't anybody gonna kiss me?

Oh, that's cool. I'll wait.

Okay, come on,
it's time for a class picture.

Up against the wall, everybody.

'Okay, you're gonna have
to squeeze in real close now.'

Come on! Get together.

Eric, why don't you be
next to Simone, okay?

- 'Get really close.'
- Okay.

Somebody fill us in down..

T.J., why don't you
get over there?

Me, too?

Well, by the time
this gets in the yearbook

you'll be in the class. Come on.

Word!

(Moore)
'Alright, everybody,
give me a big smile now--'

Excuse me, Mr. Moore,
once again I wanna beg you for..

- Look--
- What's going on here?

Well, it's perfect, okay?

It's all in focus.
You just push the button, okay?

Oh! What a swell idea!

[chuckles]
Alright.
Hey, everybody, smile now!

'Look happy!'

[instrumental music]

- See you tomorrow.
- Bye.

- Bye.
- Bye.

- Mr. Moore?
- Yeah.

We'd just like to say thank you
for helping us fit in today.

I mean, they're really not
a bad bunch of kids.

Yeah, I kinda like 'em. Heh.

I feel like this
whole experience is something

that I'm going to relive
over and over again

in future lives.

I often feel that way myself.
Ha-ha.

Don't worry, Mr. Moore,
I'll be on time and on top

and I won't cause
anymore trouble

than anybody else in this class.

Now that is really
a frightening thought.

[instrumental music]

[theme music]