All language subtitles for Head.Of.The.Class.S01E05_2

[theme music]

[music continues]

[instrumental music]

- Morning.
- Hi.

Mr. Moore,
how's your third period today?

Whatever happened to
how was your weekend?

Yes, I'm free
for your third period.

Good. Mr. Wigan's sick.

I need you to cover
his chemistry class.

Well, I don't know that much
about chemistry.

Why should that stop you?

You don't know that much
about history, either.

[laughs]

You walked right into that one.

Well, how was it?

- How was what?
- Your weekend. I'm asking.

Oh! It was great.
I met an interesting woman.

Interesting? How?

- Very..
- Oh, wow!

- She's gorgeous.
- That's what's interesting.

You didn't meet her
borrowing a cup of sugar.

Hey, I have a wife.

You know, it's a beautiful
Saturday afternoon.

SoHo. Art gallery.

We're looking
at an Andy Warhol.

I'm looking, she's buying.

Next thing you know
we're having a cup of coffee

and I'm telling her
my life story.

Which she finds fascinating?

More than fascinating.
Mesmerizing.

We're having dinner together

at my place
a week from tomorrow.

Ooh! Gee,
why wait so long, Charlie?

She has a modeling assignment
in Brazil.

- Great.
- Hmm.

Oh, that gives you a whole week
to redecorate or move.

Well, actually
she knows all about me.

I don't know that much
about her though.

Actually, Charlie,
you know a lot about her.

She's beautiful, she can
look forward to Andy Warhol

and she's got
very good taste in men.

- What's her name?
- Shayeeda.

And she's a phony.

Fooled me.

[bell rings]

Okay, let's get started.

Uh, Alan, by the way

I didn't get a chance to tell..

...you and Darlene,
that I was very impressed

by your presentation
on the Berlin Wall.

- We're ready, Mr. Moore.
- Janice.

- Would you like to see it now?
- In a minute.

But you're cutting into
our time, Mr. Moore.

Janice, you're only
ten years old.

Time is all you've got.

Forget it, Mr. Moore,
let her start.

Okay, I'll talk to you later.

No. We're just givin' in to her
'cause she's a little kid.

- How's she ever gonna learn?
- What's she gonna learn?

She already knows everything.

[sighs]
Thank you, Eric.

- Can we start now?
- Okay. Start.

Hurry up.

- The US--
- Oh! This is Arvid's part.

And I'll do mine next,
but first I'll operate

the visuals for his segment.

[clears throat]

Arvid is going to analyze
the importance of the space race

and the propaganda data
between the two superpowers.

- Russia--
- Uh..

J-Janice,
you-you're saying my part.

- No, I'm not.
- Yes, you are.

- I'm introducing you.
- You don't have to.

They-they know me.
Uh, I, I'm Arvid, right?

[indistinct chatter]

Okay. Ahem.

By April 1961, the Russians
had already put a man in orbit.

So, now, what could the US do
that will be truly spectacular?

- Put a man on the moon.
- Oh, that's it. Forget it.

Anyone got
a tranquilizer dart?

I got a clear shot at her
from here.

Just, just relax, Janice.

Now, now, you two have this
all set.

Why don't you just
stick with that?

You have to back off, okay? We
can't hear what Arvid is saying.

No, this is my project

and I'm just as much
a part of it as Arvid is.

- He's doing fine on his own.
- 'Yeah.'

- 'Yeah.'
- Okay, then.

Let him do it on his own
if everybody loves him so much!

(in unison)
Oh, Janice. Janice. Janice.

- Excuse me for a moment.
- Let me talk to her, Mr. Moore.

She'll listen to me.

Do you know what the problem is,
Mr. Moore?

She's young, she's brilliant

but she's immature.
Socially naive.

Being in a class like this
must be very stressful.

Alan, that's a sensitive
observation, you know.

- What do you propose we do?
- Get rid of her.

Uh, she's alright, Mr. Moore.
She just needs to be alone.

I mean, if she was really upset,
she'd be playing her..

[cello music]

...cello.

Uh, I'll be right back,
you just, uh, carry on

with what you were doing.

All we were doing
is wasting time.

Keep wasting.

Mr. Moore, what's wrong
with Janice?

- Well, she's upset.
- Janice..

Janice.

This is your high school
principal talking to you.

She's upset.

- Right. Exactly.
- Take care of this.

This is a hallway
in a high school

not the waiting room
at "Star Search."

Janice.

- Janice.
- Yes?

I think you made your point.

Thank you.

Can you tell me, uh
...what was your point?

- I'm hated.
- Oh!

They don't hate you, Janice.

Alright,
they severely dislike me.

Well, you weren't exactly
Mother Teresa in there.

Why should I be nice to them?
They are never nice to me.

It's always, "Janice, shut up!"
or "Janice, cool it!"

It's got to I hate any sentence
that begin with my name.

Janice..

Ahem! Lazarotto, look..

What's your real problem here?

I mean,
what do you want from them?

I don't know, it's just that

they're always
hanging around together.

They go to places and things,
and they never ask me.

Can't be just because
I'm younger.

I'm more than compensate
with my superior intelligence.

Something you rarely fail
to mention to them.

Mr. Moore,
I just thought of something.

Could I be obnoxious?

Well..

Look, uh,
you can't dwell on the past.

What there is of it, uh..

...you have to start fresh,
today.

(Mr. Moore)
Now, I think that
you should make the first move.

Maybe invite them over.

- Throw a party.
- That's it!

I know what to do, Mr. Moore.

- Bye.
- Wait..

[cello music]

[instrumental music]

(Samuels)
'Mr. Moore, phone call
from Brazil.'

- Uh, Brazil?
- Maybe you've heard of it.

It's the largest country
in South America.

Hello. Hi.

It's okay. I, I got it.

- It's personal.
- Okay. Alright.

- Everybody, move along.
- Hi, Shayeeda.

Well, it's great to hear
your voice too.

No, it's about, uh, 8:30
in the morning here.

Uh, how-how did you..

Oh, you remembered
Fillmore High School, huh?

Do you mind?

Yeah. No, I have not
forgotten about dinner.

- Mr. Moore! Mr. Moore!
- Uh, Janice, I'm on the phone.

- I'm gonna have a party.
- Can it, can it wait?

- Will you come?
- Uh..

C-c-can we talk
about this later?

No, Shayeeda.
No, we can talk now, I..

- Do you promise?
- I, I promise. I, I promise.

- That's one.
- Okay. Uh, yeah.

Okay. I can't wait, uh..

Okay. Bye-bye.

Do you know a restaurant
called Manne?

Oh, yeah.
You're having dinner there?

- Yeah, Saturday.
- Start saving up.

[bells rings]

Okay, everybody, sorry,
I'm late. Uh, let's get started.

Mr. Moore,
did you get one of these?

What is that?

An invitation to a Smurf party.

Oh, uh, yes, I did.
Janice's party.

[chuckles]
She's trying to be friendly.
I think it's a big step.

The step may be big,
but the party is gonna be small

because nobody is going.

Oh, not nobody.
I'm going.

Who is this blue person?

This is gonna be
like getting trapped on

the "It's A Small World" ride
for three hours.

I don't wanna go to a party
where the chairs are

six inches off the floor.

Not only am I going but I expect
to see each of there as well.

[indistinct chatter]

Janice has made
a gesture of friendship

and the only decent thing to do
is respond in kind.

I mean, come on,
what is one night

out of your entire lifetime?

- Which night?
- Saturday.

- No.
- Yes.

- No.
- Yes.

Sorry, I'm late,
but I was trying to get

Dr. Samuels
to come to my party.

- Well, is he coming?
- No.

He said he was planning
to have a previous engagement.

Spot quiz, everyone.
Yesterday's material.

- Oh, my God!
- Mr. Moore.

I've got it on my computer.

[indistinct chatter]

Not for you, but I do
have a question for you.

Do you really think
that Saturday night

is the best time
for this party?

Everybody knows,
Saturday night is party night.

Oh.. Uh, Saturday night party
is such a cliche.

Well, it's my first party

and I wanna keep it
traditional.

There's your problem. See, it,
it.. Y-you're in a rut, Janice.

Y-you're unwilling
to try anything new.

I mean, be radical,
get crazy, try Friday.

No. Saturday is fine.

- You are coming, aren't you?
- Oh, of course.

Good, because for a moment
I thought

you might be planning
to bail out on me too.

- Ahem.
- Janice?

Yeah.

Could I bring someone?

[instrumental music]

[instrumental music]

[sighs]
What's the use?

I don't think anybody is coming.

It's early yet, Janice,
it's only..

Oh, my goodness.

[doorbell buzzes]

There's somebody!

Come on, Dennis.
Come on, Arvid. Join the party.

[instrumental music]

This is it?
Just us?

Well, thanks, Janice.
It's been real nice.

Come on, Arvid, let's go. We
still have time to donate blood.

Blood? Now?
Aren't they closed?

We'll break in.

- Hi.
- Oh, hi.

Hi, everybody.
I'm so glad you could make it.

(Jawaharlal)
Welcome to the lonely party.

Sarah, have a jelly bean,
please.

Okay, everybody.
Get your rat faces.

Boy rodents over here.
Girl rodents are over there.

(Dennis)
Rat faces?

What are we gonna play, Janice?
Spread the plague?

Here, Darlene,
put on a rat face.

In a minute, Janice, I just have
to finish my term paper.

- Just put it on, please.
- Janice, why rat faces?

Because they were
all out of pig faces.

Do you mind if I wear mine
as a wrist corsage?

- Hi, every..
- Hi.

Hi.

Okay, everybody.
We'll start with Brain Teasers!

Maybe we shouldn't get
really insane

until Mr. Moore gets here.

Okay. Here's an easy one.

Thirteen percent of all
the people in DeKalb, Illinois

have unlisted phone numbers.

If you select 13,000 names
at random from the phonebook

what is the expected
number of people

with unlisted phone numbers?

- Oh. Oh, Janice.
- I'm waiting.

Okay, I'll tell you. Zero.

People with unlisted
phone numbers aren't listed.

[laughing]

Okay, num-nums,
here's another one.

[murmuring]

Just in time, Mr. Moore.
Here, put on a rat face.

Well, you wanna hold
the festivities

just a second, Janice.
This is my friend, Shayeeda.

- This is Janice.
- Hello.

Hi. I hope that
you're good at charades.

Well, we'll find out.

Uh, let me introduce you
to the rest of the ladies.

Uh, this is, Maria and Simone

and Sarah and Darlene. Shayeeda.

And, uh, the fellas, of course.

- Uh, Alan.
- How do you do?

Eric, Dennis, Jawaharlal

and, uh, Arvid,
this is Shayeeda.

Arvid?

Would you like
something to drink?

Oh, yes, uh, I'd like
a Black Russian with Stoli.

I don't know what that is.

But do you want it
in a Smurf cup or a Snoopy cup?

Do you have a diet soda?

Two. In Snoopy cups.

Listen, she's very special,
and this is a big night for her.

And you're very special too.

It could be a big night
for everyone.

Darling, this is wild fun,
but what time

is our dinner reservation?

Uh, 8:30. You know,
with all these masks

it must seem like
carnival in Brazil, right?

That's a half hour from now.

Well, we better not
fill-up on these jelly beans.

Hello, I'm Dr. Lazarotto.

And this is Dr. Lazarotto.

Oh, you're both psychiatrists.

Uh, Charlie Moore,
and this is Shayeeda.

- Shayeeda?
- Just Shayeeda.

- Well, let's not hover, dear.
- Right. This is Janice's hour.

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

Okay, everybody.

It's time to play Ghost.

Maybe I'll just
talk to the adults. Okay?

- Charlie?
- Yeah.

- Mr. Moore.
- Yeah. Uh, uh, yes.

Charlie, you said
we'd just put in an appearance.

Yeah, well, just let me
get things started, okay?

- Yes.
- Come on.

It's time to play Ghost.

Well, d-do you really think
that's what everybody

wants to do right now?

That's what I planned.

See what I mean?
She's pushin' us around again.

- Well, not really.
- Do you want to play Ghost?

Ahem. See you have some
music here, Janice.

Anybody feel like dancing?
I mean, we could dance. Yeah.

Great idea.

- Allow me to take this.
- Yeah.

[upbeat music]

[children singing]

- Oh.
- Oh, Janice!

Janice, we should go now.

Janice, don't you have
anything else?

Why should she bother?
It's her bedtime soon.

Maybe my parents
have another record.

It'll probably be "Floyd Sings
Songs for Young Lovers."

[laughs]

It's Floyd. "Young Gun." Ha ha.

Well, nothing like
ending a party on a real high.

- Can we go now?
- Darling..

Janice is gonna find
some music.

Now, we are right on the edge
for some real fun.

I don't think I could handle
anymore fun. Shall we?

Well, uh, I think we should
stay a little longer.

A little longer is a lifetime.

Face it, Mr. Moore,
it's a very boring party.

I don't think
it's gonna get any better.

Yeah, it's like the flu. You
have to suffer till it's over.

No, you don't. Uh, t-this party
is what we make it.

- It is not just Janice.
- Charlie, really?

No, that's very sweet,
but I'm starving.

I'm getting a boredom headache.
I have to leave, really.

Uh. This is a very
important night for her.

She's gone through
a lot of trouble here.

'I mean,
just a few more minutes.'

You know, put on the old
rat nose, play some charades.

Okay, Charlie, you want
charades? Alright, one word.

Goodbye?

You let her get away?

You're a very sick man,
Mr. Moore.

If you'd like to leave,
you're free to go with her.

Uh, however, I do think
when you're leaving a party

it's considered polite to
say goodnight to your hostess.

I'll go get her.

Come in.

Who's your friend?

Big Ted.

He looks kind of upset.

Yes.

Are you, and, uh, Big Ted
going to, uh, spend

the rest of the evening in here?

Yeah.

You really think
that's considerate?

You have guests
in the living room.

I don't wanna go
out there anymore.

I don't even wanna
go to school anymore.

- They all hate me.
- Look, they don't hate you.

- They're here, aren't they?
- Yeah, but they're not trying.

- Are you trying?
- What do you mean?

Well, last week in class
when you were

doing your presentation
with Arvid

were you trying
to think about how he felt?

I didn't have to,
he knew what to do.

Oh, but you didn't let him.
You wanted to do it your way.

Well, now you're giving
the party your way.

And you expect them to love it.

Why shouldn't they?

Well, you're not giving
the party for them.

You're giving it for yourself.

The rat noses, Smurfs.

Those are all things
that you like.

What do they like?

I don't know.

Don't you think a smart hostess

would take the trouble
to find out?

I'm a num-num, right?

But what do we do now?

Well, we could go back out
in the living room with them

just relax and see what happens.

Maybe they'd like some food.

Why didn't I think of that?

Oh. And I'm sorry
your date isn't having any fun.

I think she's so sophisticated
and beautiful

and gorgeous and fabulous.

- She left.
- You're better off.

Okay, everybody.

I know this party
is a real disaster.

Nobody wants to be here.

And I'm sorry
I did everything wrong, okay?

But I've got all this food
and I don't wanna throw it out.

So, could you take some
before you go home?

Hey, Janice,
this is alright.

- What is it?
- Mexican pizza.

It is good, Janice.
How do you make it?

Well, my mom uses
three cheeses and.. What else?

Jalapeno peppers, olives
and Quantock cheese.

- The blue corn, of course.
- You're a psychiatrist, right?

I have this terrible
anxiety problem.

Mr. Moore, I'm so happy to have
this opportunity to meet you.

Well, actually,
I've always been very curious

about Janice's parents.

Hey, is there any more of this?

Eric, are you going to share
that music with us or not?

- Yeah, Eric.
- Why not?

[upbeat music]

Mr. Moore, it's working.
What happened?

You were a very
gracious hostess.

You gave them freedom
to do what they want.

They wanted to leave.

Well, they changed their minds.

You see, parties
are funny that way.

I mean, they come to life
when you least expect it

and then there's
no stopping them.

Like Godzilla.

- Sort of.
- Huh! That's it.

I'll throw
a Godzilla party next.

And everybody comes
dressed as Godzilla.

Look.. Why don't we just enjoy
this one for now, huh?

Okay. Mr. Moore,
would you care to boogie?

I'd love to.

[music continues]

[instrumental music]

[theme music]