All language subtitles for Grace And Frankie SE04 E05 The Pop-Ups

♪ Well, I don't know
Why I came here tonight ♪

♪ Got the feelin'
That somethin' ain't right ♪

♪ I'm so scared
In case I fall off my chair ♪

♪ And I'm wondering
How I'll get down the stairs ♪

♪ And there's clowns to the left of me
Jokers to the right ♪

♪ Here I am
Stuck in the middle with you ♪

♪ Yes, I'm stuck in the middle with you ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

Did anyone tell you Robert was gay?

Yes. Robert did.

I believe you, Sol, and a seafood tower
were there at the time.

No, I mean, before you got married.

Did anyone ever try to warn you?

No. Why?

Ah, I was just thinking

about those three-quarter length pants
he used to wear.

What would you call those?

Shants? Ports?

-Clamdiggers.
-Right.

Clamdiggers.

Ironic.

Frankie, much as I enjoy your strolls
down non-sequitur lane...

They are pretty scenic.

Would you please stop decomposing
over there and come and help me?

Wish I could.

But I'm in a vicious street brawl
with the universe at the moment.

So's your hair.

No, seriously.

She's been sending me dreams and signs

and near-death experiences
to get me to do something.

But I really don't want to do it.

I'll bite.
What is the universe telling you to do?

Oh, I can't tell you.
By naming the thing, you give it power.

It's a classic
Beetlejuice/Babadook situation.

Are those your yogurt friends?

I think you're thinking
of my friend, Barbaduke.

Hey, Miss Universe!

Oh, my God, it's a sign...

that we have to pack up these vibrators
for the pop-up at Arlene's.

Okay, fine. I'll help.

But what is Arlene doing
in an old folks' home, anyway?

She's my age.

Our age.

Really?

You come off as so much older.

Walden Villas is not an old folks' home.
It's a "senior living community."

-Same thing.
-Arlene is very happy there,

so we have to keep an open mind.

Not to mention,
it's gonna be a gold mine for us.

Those places are hotbeds of sex,

teeming with chlamydia.

Hmm. You do make it sound fun.

I know we haven't hit it off.

And I'm sorry for saying
you were put together inside out.

But I'm trying to do something nice
for your mom, so please don't hurt me.

Showtime, folks.

Have you noticed anything different
about Gregory tonight?

Oh, is he drooling?
'Cause all his bibs are in the dryer.

Uh...

No.

He just looks a little... shiny.

You can't put a collar on Gregory!
He has contact dermatitis! Aw!

I thought you had that.

-How do you think he lost all his hair?
-He's not a hairless cat?

What... Oh! Okay.

What are you doing down there?

Holy shit.

Is that a...

Are... you...

Allison...

Alistair

Giampietro-Smikowitz...

will you...

marry me?

Oh...

Nwabudike Douglas Bergstein...
it's beautiful.

I mean, it's unsanitary from the floor,

-but we can Purell it.
-We can Purell it.

I still don't think we should get married
just 'cause we're having a baby.

I keep telling you,
it's not just because of the baby.

I've wanted to marry you for a long time.

I got into a fight with Coyote
because of how serious I was about you.

Months ago!

You got into a fight with Coyote about me?

Uh...

No. I mean, it wasn't about you.

It was about how much you love candy corn,
which he doesn't get,

because why are there layers
if the layers don't taste different?

-They do taste different.
-Exactly.

But let's forget
about Coyote's unsophisticated palate.

It's hard.

What's the problem?

I love you.

You love me.

We're both definitely
not scared of Gregory.

Say yes.

Okay.

Is that "yes"?
I kind of need to hear you say "yes."

Yes. It's a yes!

Yes!

Mmm. Mmm...

Oh, my God. You said yes.

This is so exciting!

-I love you so much.
-I love you, too.

There might just be one little thing...

How come I never get to pick
where we do pop-ups?

Because this is literally the first time
you've expressed any interest.

Except, I've been in the vibrator business
for years now,

and I think I've earned the right
to pick some pop-ups.

All right. Okay.

You can pick the next one.

-Where do you want to go?
-Not sure.

I know where the universe wants me to go.

Oh, Jesus.

Here, I thought we could put these
on the table.

-I think they'll look nice.
-That's a great idea.

So, how are things going
with this new guy you've been seeing?

So far, pretty great.

I mean, he's not who I would've thought
I'd be with, but, you know,

-I'm having a hell of a time.
-Oh.

He's surprising... in a good way.

You deserve some good surprises.

How about you? You seem really happy here.

Oh, I am. It's great.

You have laundry service, housekeeping,
they pick up your prescriptions...

Wow. Imagine having someone
to do your laundry and run your errands.

You have that person. Her name's me.

By the by, we're out of dryer sheets,
the lavender ones.

We wouldn't be out of them if you didn't
use them as deodorant.

You know, it seems
this table stuff is going real well.

So I'm gonna go make
some breakfast nachos.

Arlene, I just need marshmallows,
chocolate, and your stove.

Oh, they don't let us have those.

Marshmallows?

No, a stove. It's an insurance thing.

Wait a minute. You don't have a stove?
But you love to cook.

I do, but I also love not cleaning up.

And they really encourage you
to eat in the dining hall.

So, you eat all your meals at, like...
communal tables?

Grace has weird boundary issues.

Try talking to her when she's in the tub.

I'll admit this whole thing has been
a bit of an adjustment for me, too.

I mean, it was hard giving up my house,

but it was so much to take care of
after Bob died.

-Couldn't your son have helped?
-He helped in other ways.

Well, Scott was the one
that convinced me to move here.

Oh. I didn't realize it was his idea.

Hello, button, my old friend.

Frankie, don't touch that!

What is it?

Oh, they have these on the walls,
in case somebody needs medical assistance.

You don't really notice them
after a while.

Ah! That must be the early birds.

You finish setting up the table

and I will take them
for a slow walk down a long hall.

God, poor Arlene.

I know. To have that fun button
and never get to push it.

No! Obviously her son dumped her here.

Didn't you say to keep an open mind
about this place?

That was when I thought
it was Arlene's choice to be here.

I mean, clearly she wanted
to stay in her own house.

Instead of helping her do that,
he's off gallivanting

while she has to eat with strangers.

I like eating with strangers.
That's how I met Barbaduke.

All I know is Arlene does not belong
in a place that doesn't have a stove,

but does have a blue button on the wall.

You pressed one, didn't you?

Oh, Grace.

I've pressed at least three.

I've got a real problem with you ladies
hustling in on my game.

The only vibrator these gals need is me,
my Viagra, and my restless leg syndrome.

Aren't you a funky little nightmare.

Sir, the Ménage is not your foe.

You know, think of men and vibrators
like cake and pie.

Women like dessert.

All right, I'll take three.

Uh... Actually, make it four.
And leave the price tags on.

Oh, this is so much fun.

I haven't had a rush like this
since I sold Mary Kay.

I haven't had a rush like this
since I sold Mary Jane.

Oh!

Teddie?

You know what? You should
come with us to our next pop-up.

-It'll do you good to get out of here.
-I don't know.

Scott doesn't like me to leave
without giving him the heads-up.

Well, why tell him?

You don't need to ask permission.
You're a grown woman.

Make your own decisions.

You're coming with us.

All right. All right.
So where are we going?

That is a good question.
My guess would be Geo Junction.

Oh, my God, are you real? Teddie?

Oh, my God, isn't there someone else
you could be bothering right now?

Yes, there is. There is.

-Uh, Grand--
-Uh!

Hush now. You've played your part,
gentle specter.

Well-played, universe.

Okay, you win.

So Spit likes him?

Mm... They've reached a détente.

Hmm. And how is Barry liking the new job?

Lauren's a monster like I said she was.

She's taking everyone out to dinner
tonight to celebrate, like,

a new product
or her period or something.

I'm sorry, were we supposed
to take you out to dinner for that?

- Yes.
- Everyone doing okay? Need anything?

Coyote, are you loving that Saint-André?

Yep. So much.

-That's my boy. Loves his cheese.
-Yeah. Yeah.

I fucking hate soft cheese.

Why don't you tell him?

It's been years and it's, like,
a thing between us now.

I don't even know how it happened.

He got me a silver cheese knife
for Hanukkah.

I'm in too deep.

What's with your family and cheese?

Hey, Mallory,
I got that pimento loaf you love.

Oh!

Did you just put cheese in your pocket?

Fingers crossed it's a murderer.

-Hi.
-Hi.

Uh, I was just leaving this
for your, um...

-Dads?
-Right.

It was delivered to our house by mistake.

Thank you. I'll take that.

Well, that took a weird turn.

It sure did.

Robert...

can you think of a reason
why Oliver would be mad at us?

-No.
-Really?

Nothing comes to mind.

Ooh, more drama.

Oh, no, it's a guy selling magazines.

Come on, Bri. Just... Come on.

Buddy! What a pleasant surprise.

Come, please join us.

What's going on here
and why wasn't I invited?

It's a girls' and dads' dinner.

Oh. Well, then why is Coyote here?

Want to field that one, Mal?

I was driving away and I saw his tiny face

pressed up against the window
of his tiny house.

I'll set another place.

No, no, no. I don't want to interrupt--

What are you talking about?
You're not interrupting.

You know, sometimes interruptions
are wonderful.

If temporary.

Everything okay?

Yeah, I wanted to talk to you and Robert
about something privately.

-We're listening.
-No, you know, it's fine. I'll just--

Oh, God, is it the baby?

No, no, no, no. The baby's fine.
Baby's fine.

Did they stop making Dockers?
Who do we call? What do we do?

Bud, what happened?

I proposed to Allison, and she said yes.

Oh, mazel tov!

Yay! Oh!

Good. This will take your mind off
the Dockers shortage.

I'll get the champagne.

-Well, maybe hold off on the champagne.
-Why?

She won't marry me without a prenup,
and I told her I won't get a prenup.

Oh.

Oh, that's bad.

Fun!

Yes, I understand the concept
of "no backsies."

I just asked why you suddenly decided
we should go to a college.

It's not exactly our customer base.

You know darn well what happened
last time I didn't listen to the universe

when she was so persistent.

My yurt exploded.

What do you have to do
to make a yurt explode?

Did you see Bad Boys II?

I am not compelled by the universe.

So I need a normal,
human reason for this pop-up.

Well, like retirement places,
colleges are hotbeds of sex.

You think old people have sexual diseases.
College invented chlamydia.

I think it's a great idea.

You have all those
older female professors.

Students are always getting hurt
playing sports.

Playing Frisbee and Rubik's Cubing,

they will love the Ménage.

And, if we can hook them while
they're young, we will have them for life.

Like cigarette companies and Degrassi.

You actually make a good argument.

I do some of my best work when I bullshit.

Oh, God.

So how are things going
with that new guy you're seeing?

Arlene, you already asked me that.

- I did?
- Yes.

Oh, of course.

I'm sorry, just one of those embarrassing
senior moments.

Oh, please, we all get them.

Speak for yourself.

I'm still sharp as a tack.

Is that a word, tack?

Ah, just one of the joys of getting older,
I guess.

You know, I read somewhere
that the antidote for those senior moments

is challenging yourself
with new experiences.

I also read it helps
if you get a helper monkey.

For the last time,
we are not getting a helper monkey.

Okay, Grace.
We'll get a monkey that doesn't help us.

Well, I am always trying to learn
new things.

Right now, I'm learning to play canasta.

Well, see, I meant,
getting out in the world,

remembering that we're vibrant,
independent women.

A little help here?

I seem to have triple-buckled myself
into my necklace.

Get me a damn monkey, Grace!

I can't believe she wants a prenup.

Lots of people want them.
That was a big part of our business.

I can't believe you didn't tell us
that you bagged a secret heiress.

Nicely done.

-She's not an heiress.
-Really?

Because that would have cleared up
a lot of questions.

She wants a prenup
because I'm a divorce lawyer.

If we broke up,
she thinks I'd be at a huge advantage.

So she wants to protect herself
and the baby.

-That is a fair point.
-Well, yeah, I get it,

but I don't want to start our marriage
assuming that it won't work out

-and things'll get ugly.
-It doesn't have to mean that.

Is it that big a deal?
You usually give her whatever she wants.

No. No prenup. Brianna wants a boat.

Agh, just don't get married.

Love fades, people change.
Then they do fine, and you're miserable.

That's a little dark, sweetheart.

Just speaking my truth.

I like you like this, all goth and surly.

-Fuck off.
-It's adorable.

You know, your father and I talked about
a prenup when we were getting married

and we decided against it,
but it took a lot of talking.

I think you just need to be honest
with Allison.

Like you should be honest
about what happened with Oliver?

I told you, nothing happened with Oliver.

And yet, all evidence
points to the contrary.

Can we talk about this later, please?

Your son has come to us for advice

and we should be
laser-focused on him right now.

I am, but I have a number of lasers

and they can point
in different directions.

-Let's not do this here and now.
-Fine.

I'll be in the study.

I'll meet you there in one minute.

We'll be right back.

Fifty-eight, fifty-seven,
fifty-six, fifty-five. Oh, jeez.

So glad I came over.

Just to recap, you weren't invited.

Brianna, could you shut the door?

Of course.

I think he meant
with you on the other side.

No. Please don't make me go back out there
and talk about marriage and babies.

Barry makes me talk about heart feels now.
Can't I just...

stay in here where it's nice and angry?

Fine, but this conversation
is also about marriage.

About a marriage I suspect
your father jeopardized.

I didn't jeopardize anything.

Then why is Oliver mad?

If not because you talked to Jo
after you promised me you wouldn't?

I did not talk to Jo. Oliver came over
and said something gay about an orchid.

Then he started asking about our marriage
and it just came out.

You went back on your word.

No, no, I called an audible.

-Football reference.
-I thought hockey, but thank you.

And if you'd have been there,
you'd have done the same thing.

the fact
that you went against what we agreed on,

or that you don't seem to care that you
hurt Oliver and his lovely bride-to-be.

-Wait, Oliver's straight?
-Thank you.

-You butted in without knowing for sure?
-Thank you.

You might be mad that I did it,
but I know I did the right thing.

Did you? Because now Oliver hates us.

Good luck getting an invite
to their Designing Women party now.

I'm sorry, who are these people? There's
an orchid and a Designing Women party,

-but Jo's a lady?
-Right?

And isn't Oliver mad at us
like a gay man would be?

I mean, dramatically dropping the package
down and then stomping off in a huff.

He was just taking his leave
like a strong Sugarbaker woman.

You can make light of this
if you want to, Robert.

But I really liked Oliver.
That's why I brought him over.

Because I thought for once,

I could be the one
bringing a new friend into our lives.

But evidently you have enough friends
on your own, so...

easy come, easy go with mine.

Enjoy.

I have to hand it to you,
this was a genius idea.

I forgot how much Millennials
love waiting in line.

Hey, since I'm such a super genius,

I've earned myself a little break, right?

How little?

Somewhere between what you think is
appropriate and what I'm going to do?

Nice try. Hand me another box of Ménages.

Or you could just disappear
in a poof of patchouli.

Enjoy.

-Thank you.
-What happened in there?

Your dad's really mad.
And not in his usual Muppet way.

Where's Mal?

I think all the marriage
and divorce talk really bummed her out.

- You know, I'm gonna go talk to her.
- No, no, let me.

I'm the one who brought it up.

Hey, am I pulling these off?

Nadia said I'd look good in a boot cut.

- Yeah, I think I'm gonna go.
- Yep. I totally understand.

Enjoy.

Excuse me, ma'am? Are you a professor
or a member of the staff here?

What does it look like?

Like a strange woman handing out dildos.

Excuse me, these are vibrators.

Oh, well, in that case,
you and your vibrators have to go.

But we are empowering young women.

-Right?
-Yeah!

Unless you have an empowerment permit,

which doesn't exist, I'm going to have
to insist that you leave. Now.

All right, folks.

Please go to class or whatever it is
you do on your parents' dime.

No, wait! Don't go!

Grace, I've had enough new experiences
for one day.

Can we just go home?

Of course.

All right, we're leaving.
Look us up on the web!

Frankie, I don't know where you went
on your little break, comma,

but we're being kicked off campus, period.

I'll see you at home, period.

If there is a monkey there,
I'm gonna train it to strangle you

and no jury will convict me,
exclamation point.

But he felt production isn't necessarily
a sign of economic health.

I have a little side note.

I hung out with Galbraith at Harvard

and he was a hell of a guy
to grab a beer with.

Excuse me, did somebody forget my rule
about no phones in my seminars?

Sorry I ruined girls' night.

It's okay. It was doomed
when I had to eat the pimento loaf.

Hey, you're lucky.
I'm "Mr. Stuffed-Grape-Leaves."

To be honest...

I was in a shit mood even before that.

Last night, I finally decided
to stop moping around the house.

So I hired a sitter

and I went to the movies.

Alone.

And I ran into Mitch.

Oh, boy.

-Coming out of a fancy restaurant.
-Oh, shit.

With some woman who he may
have been holding hands with.

Fuck.

Yeah.

So that might explain why I was...

a little negative
about the whole marriage thing.

"A little negative"? You were like
John Wick after they killed his puppy.

I'm sorry.

I'm also sorry
you just ruined John Wick for me.

Excuse you, it came out two years ago.
There's a sequel.

Well, I've been a little busy
having my whole life fall apart.

You know...

I get where Allison's coming from.

Divorce is so awful.

Why not give yourself a safety net?

The only problem is,
if you do get divorced,

it undoes everything you believe and...

your heart will be broken.

And nothing...

certainly not a piece of paper,

is going to protect you from that.

Are you sure Frankie's okay?
She never texted you back.

Don't worry. It's her MO.

Radio silence if she's mad
or she knows she's in trouble.

I didn't hear from her for a whole day
after she set off fireworks in the pantry.

Oh, she is one-of-a-kind.

Yeah.

So, how are things going
with that new guy you're seeing?

You already asked me that, honey.

I did?

Oh, I'm sorry.

It's okay.

Wait, where are you going?

You have to make a right on Escondido.

This isn't the way to my house.

Arlene, you don't live
in that house anymore.

-What?
-No.

You moved to Walden Villas
a few months ago.

Oh.

Okay.

Don't worry.

Hey. Were you asleep?

Conflict makes me a little sleepy.

I'm sorry we argued.

Me, too.

I did do some thinking about the prenup.

And I think you're right.

You deserve to go into this marriage
with some security.

So... I drew up
a preliminary agreement for us.

"In the event of a divorce,
Allison Alistair Giampietro-Smikowitz

can have anything she wants
from Nwabudike Douglas Bergstein."

I don't understand.

I'm worried you might be a bad lawyer.

I'm actually a pretty good lawyer.

I've handled a lot of divorces.
And my parents are divorced.

And Mal's getting divorced.

But despite all that,

or, I don't know, maybe because of it,

I want to start our life together
with a leap of faith.

With my whole heart.

So, you can have
whatever you need to feel secure.

All I want is you.

Oh, Bud, that is so sweet.

All I want is you, too.

And I want to take
that leap of faith with you.

Oh, fuck! Gregory can't eat paper!
And I can't bend over.

I need you to reach in
and pull it out of his throat!

Thank God!

-Scott.
-Mom, where have you been?

You weren't signed out,
and I've been calling for hours.

-Are you all right?
-I'm fi...

-Well, I think your mom got a little...
-Tired.

It's been a long day.
Oh, I'm sorry you were worried, honey.

Grace and I went out for a bit,
and I must have forgotten my phone.

Sure you're all right?
You don't want to see one of the nurses?

I'm fine.

Let us say goodbye,
I'll freshen up a little,

and then we'll go to the dining hall
and have dinner.

I did have a lot of fun
with you guys today.

-Yeah. Me, too.
-Oh...

Maybe we could do it again sometime?

-I'd love to.
-Okay.

Um...

Scott,

I know it's not my business...

but what's going on with your mother?

Oh, she's fine most of the time.

There were a few incidents
when she was living alone.

Things left to burn on the stove,

forgetting how to turn off
the alarm system.

That's why we convinced her to move here.

They have different levels of care
in case things get worse.

I'm so sorry.

-I had no idea.
-Mom's pretty proud.

I'm sure she doesn't want you
to see her any differently.

Yeah... I get that.

Well, I'd better get going.

Have a nice dinner.

Oh, wait.

Do you need me to get someone
to give you a ride home?

No, thanks.

I can still drive myself.

Well, we'll talk about an extension later.

It seems my sister,
who I haven't seen for 40 years,

has taken a sudden interest
in economic theory.

Hi, Teddie.

Hi, Frankie. It's been a while. Who died?

Me. Not physically,
but bureaucratically and emotionally.

Well, I see the years
haven't dimmed your gift for hyperbole.

No, in fact,
they've strengthened my gifts.

I kind of feel like a Highlander.

What are you doing here?

I've been thinking a lot
about what if I did die.

What would I regret?

And my biggest regret
is what happened between us.

I want to fix this...
before it's too late.

You were right about Sol being gay.

I still can't believe you told me
just before my wedding,

but you were right about him.

I'm sorry I was right.

That's it? That's all I get?

I haven't heard from you in four decades.

-What did you expect?
-I don't know.

But I've had the universe up my ass
to come see you

and, turns out,
you can't not listen to the universe.

Can't you?

Can we please just talk to each other?

We just did.

It made no sense,

and I have a departmental meeting
in seven minutes.

Well, I'm not going anywhere.

That's fine.

My meeting's in another building.

Oh, that's great, Teddie.
But I'm not giving up.

We're gonna make our peace, lady.

You hear me? We're gonna make peace!

Real mature, Teddie! Real mature.

What do I do now, universe?

♪ Time ♪

♪ Keeps moving on ♪

♪ Friends ♪

♪ They turn away ♪

♪ I keep moving on ♪

♪ But I never found out why ♪

♪ I keep pushing so hard a dream ♪

♪ I keep trying to make it right ♪

♪ Through another lonely day ♪

♪ Whoa ♪

Okay, good night.