Original subtitles

THE PHYSICS OF ATTRACTIONAND REPULSION -

IS WHAT WE'RE GOING TO EXPLORETODAY USING STATIC ELECTRICITY.

SO I WANT ALL OF YOU TO PAYCAREFUL ATTENTION

TO YOUR EXPERIMENTS

AND PLEASE MAKE SURE THATYOU TAKE DETAILED NOTES.

WILL YOU BE MY FRIEND, TOBY ISAACS?

WILL YOU SHUT UPAND DO YOUR WORK?

HELLO!

JT!

UGH!

I'M A MASTODON. I DIED10,000 YEARS AGO.

YOU RUINED THIS.

WILL YOU BEMY FRIEND?

NO!

YOU HAVE THE CUTEST BONES...

I BET YOU SAY THAT TO ALLTHE SKELETAL MASTODONS...

NO... JUST YOU... I'M GONNAKISSY- KISS YOU ALL OVER...

JT YORKE.

SORRY, MS. HATZILAKOS.

I'M SORRY TOO. OH DON'T LISTENTO HIM, HE'S LYING.

ONE WEEK, GUINEA PIG DUTY -

EVERY DAY BEFORE AND AFTERSCHOOL, RIGHT HERE, WITH ME.

? Whatever it takes

? I know I can make through

? If I hold out

? If I do

? I know I can make through

? Be the best

? The best that I can be

? Hear what I say to you

? Whatever it takes

? I can see it

? I know I can make it

? I know I can make it through

THANKS.

COME ON IN.

GOOD MORNINGMS. HATZILAKOS.

OH, GOOD MORNING JT.

OKAY LET'S GET STARTED.RIGHT THIS WAY.

SO WE MAINLY FEED THE GUINEA PIGS DRIED TIMOTHY GRASS.

SUPPLEMENTED WITH PELLETS,FRESH VEGETABLES.

OF COURSE, THEY ALWAYS NEEDA FRESH SUPPLY OF WATER.

DO YOU MIND?

OH SORRY.

OH, IS THAT YOUR PENON THE GROUND?

NOPE. MUST BE YOURS.

OKAY, LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO THE BROOD.

RIGHT HERE WE HAVEJASPER, BISMARCK,

AND THIS CUTIEIS ISABELLA.

SHE'S LIKE A BIG BALLOF FLUFF.

A REALLY FAT BALLOF FLUFF.

YEAH, SHE IS MUCH BIGGERTHEN USUAL.

WELL LOOK AT YOU.

YOU'VE HAVETHE MAGIC TOUCH.

DID YOU EVER THINKOF BECOMING A VETERINARIAN?

I TRIED ONCE, BUT THEREAREN'T ENOUGH RECIPES.

PLUS I LOVE MEAT.

I SAID VETERINARIAN,NOT VEGETARIAN.

I KNOW.I WAS JOKING.

"THE MEDIUM IS THE MESSAGE."DOES ANYONE KNOW WHO SAID THAT?

MARSHALL MCLUHAN -

THE GODFATHER OF MODERN MEDIA AND COMMUNICATIONS.

AND DID YOU KNOW MCLUHAN WAS CANADIAN?

HEY - HOW WAS YOUR'QUALITY TIME'

WITH MS. HOT SAUCE?

HOT AND SAUCY.

FULL REPORT. NOW.

FIRST? I DID ONEOF THESE - OOPS!

THEN SHE BENT DOWNTO PICK IT UP - OH!

JT? IS THIS YOURS?

YEAH.

YOU WANNA PAY ATTENTION?OKAY.

ANYWAYS...

YOU GUYS CAN'T IMAGINETHE THINGS I SAW...

NOT BAD, GAVIN. BUT WHATEXACTLY IS A "SEXAGRAM"?

THAT THINGYWITH SIX POINTS?

AH NO, THAT'SA "HEXAGRAM".

OH. OOPS.

COME TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.

YOU REALLY NEED TO TAKE ANOTHERLOOK AT YOUR ANSWER

FOR PROBLEM NUMBER TEN.

OH THAT HAS TO BEA TRICK QUESTION.

AH NO, JUST UH, SIMPLE BATH -UH, MATH.

JULIAN CAN I SEE YOUR ASSIGNMENT PLEASE?

IS THAT SPINNER THAT SMELLS?SHOULD WE TELL HIM?

HONESTY NEVER HURTS.

RULE NUMBER ONE OF PUBERTY?SHOWER EVERY DAY.

DUDE, DUDE.

THE TRUTH -DO I STINK?

UM, YEAH,ACTUALLY.

YOU'VE SMELLEDREALLY BAD ALL WEEK.

WELL, WHY DIDN'TYOU TELL ME?

I DIDN'T WANTTO HURT YOUR FEELINGS.

WELL, BETTER I HEAR IT FROMYOU, THEN ELLIE, DUDE.

THE TRUTH FROMNOW ON, OKAY?

"YOU CAN'T HANDLETHE TRUTH."

JACK NICHOLSON.

UM OKAY.BUT THIS - IT'S SERIOUS,

IT'S IMPORTANT.COME ON, LET'S MAKE A PACT.

SURE, MAN. WHATEVER.

JIM-!

OKAY IF IT TAKES FRED45 SECONDS

TO FILL HIS TEN LITRE FISHTANK,

HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE HIMTO FILL HIS OTHER TANKS:

NOW, FIVE OF THEM AREFIVE LITRE TANKS

AND TEN OF THEM ARE TWO LITRETANKS?

YEAH, I THINK FRED NEEDSTO GET A LIFE.

THANK YOU, MR. YORKE...

JT HAS A LIFE.HE'S GOT A NEW GIRLFRIEND.

REALLY?YOU MEAN LIBERTY?

FINALLY!

NO.

MS. HOTS-O-LA-KOS...

THAT IS SO TYPICAL.

NO, SO JT.IMMATURE AND DUMB.

WHY?

WHAT'S WRONG WITH A YOUNGER GUYDATING AN OLDER WOMAN, ANYWAY?

THERE'S A RULE.

THE YOUNGEST YOU CAN DATE ISHALF YOUR AGE PLUS SEVEN.

SO FOR MS. H - WHO'S, WHAT, THIRTY?

THAT'S - FIFTEEN PLUS SEVEN...

WHICH IS TWENTY-TWO.

AND YOU'RE SHORTBY A COUPLE OF YEARS.

AND MORE THEN A COUPLEOF FEET.

MELANDA STARED INTO THE SOULOF THE ECLIPSE.

AND SAW THE WORLDFOR WHAT IT WAS -

A SHADOW OF BLACK, EMPTY,DESPAIRING NOTHINGNESS.

WOW. HAPPY.

THOUGHTS ANYONE?

JIMMY BROOKS?

OH UH, WELL I, YOU KNOW -THOUGHT IT WAS POETIC.

YO, YOU MADE A PROMISE,DUDE.

SPIN - SHUT UP.

GENTLEMEN, IF YOU HAVEANY COMMENTS,

PLEASE SHARE THEMWITH THE CLASS.

I DON'T.

OH, HE DOES, MS. KWAN.JIMMY?

OKAY. I THOUGHT YOU WERE TRYINGWAY TO HARD TO BE PROFOUND

AND YOU JUST LOST THE STORY.

HONESTLY? IT SOUNDED LIKEA SUICIDE NOTE.

WELL, I WOULDN'T EXPECTA CONFORMIST TO UNDERSTAND.

ASHLEY - THIS EXERCISE IS ABOUTCONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM.

OKAY WE'VE GOT ABOUT FIFTEEN MINUTES LEFT.

ENOUGH TIME FOR TWO MORE VOLUNTEERS.

ANYONE? STEVEN, ARE YOU READY TO READ?

HEY, WHAT'S UP?

JT! I WANT TO SHOW YOUSOMETHING.

I'LL BET SHE DOES...

WELL, I THOUGHT ABOUTWHAT YOU SAID -

ABOUT ISABELLA'S WEIGHTPROBLEM.

WELL IT'S NOT THAT -SHE'S PREGNANT!

WOW. A HUNDRED LITTLE GUINEAPIGS JUST WAITING TO BE BORN.

WELL, MORE LIKE THREE OR FOUR.

YOU CAN FEEL THEM, INSIDE HER.THAT'S HOW I REALIZED.

HERE.

RIGHT THERE.

CAN YOU FEEL THEM?

WOW.

I CAN'T BELIEVE ISABELLAIS GONNA BE A MOM.

THAT IS SO COOL.

DOES SHE NEED ANYTHING?

LIKE - A SPECIAL DIET OR SOMETHING?

HOW ABOUT I DO SOME RESEARCH?

THAT'D BE GREAT. THAT WOULD BEA GREAT HELP, THANKS JT.

IT'S OKAY.

WHAT'RE YOU DOING HERE?

AND ON YOUR LUNCH HOUR?

JUST TRYING TO DO SOME RESEARCHFOR MS. HATZILAKOS.

YOUR SPELLING...

AH, THERE IS SUCH A THING AS PRIVACY, YOU KNOW.

YEAH, I KNOW, BUT --

OH... THANKS.

NO PROBLEM.

NOW - WHEN MANNY RUBS THE BALLOONS ON HER HAIR,

THEY BECOME NEGATIVELY-CHARGED.

AND THEY BECOME ATTRACTED TOHER POSITIVELY-CHARGED HAIR.

NOW THE MOMENT MANNYSTEPS AWAY ...

THE BALLOONS REPEL

BECAUSE THEY'RE BOTHNEGATIVELY-CHARGED.

MS. HATZILAKOS - CAN ISEE YOU FOR A SECOND?

AH, SURE.

WHY DON'T YOU CONTINUEBLOWING UP YOUR BALLOONS.

AND I'LL JUST BE A MINUTE.

LOOKS LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIENDHAS A BOYFRIEND.

MR. ARMSTRONGIS MARRIED.

SO? MS. HATZILAKOSISN'T.

SHE'S NOT LIKE THAT.

IT WAS A JOKE.

YEAH REMEMBER?

YOU USED TO TELL THEM?

HELLO I'M A MASTODON.

TOBY SHUT UP?I'M TRYING TO CONCENTRATE.

SORRY, LIBERTY.

SO TEACHER'S PET,

WHEN IS MS. HGETTING YOU YOUR OWN CAGE?

I'M NOT HER PET.

OH REALLY. LET'S SEE HERE.

WE'VE GOT JASPER, BISMARCK, ISABELLA - JT.

WHAT'S THE MATTER SEAN? HUH?

YOU JEALOUS?

DO YOU WANT TO BE MY OTHERGUINEA PIG BOY?

OH AND WHAT ABOUT YOU, TOBY?

MY, MY, MY YOU'RE A FURRYLITTLE ONE.

YEAH, I'M SUREYOU DO-

ITHYOUR STUPID HONESTY PACT.

DUDE, YOU DID HER A FAVOUR.SHE SHOULD HAVE THANKED YOU.

YEAH WELL TELL HER THAT.

SPIN, SOMETIMES PEOPLE DON'TWANT THE WHOLE TRUTH.

WELL, THEN THEY'RE STUPID.

IF IT WAS ME? I'D WANTTHE WHOLE TRUTH ENCHILADA.

JIMMY.

ASH. UHM, LOOK,

I'M REALLY SORRY ABOUTYESTERDAY.

ACTUALLY? YOU SAVED MY STORY.

WHAT?

YOU WERE RIGHT.

I WENT THROUGH IT LAST NIGHTAND MADE SOME CHANGES

AND IT IS WAY BETTER.

I LIKE THIS NEW JIMMY.

I GUESS YOU WERE RIGHT, MAN.

ALL HONESTY - ALL THE TIMEFROM NOW ON.

GOOD. CAN I BE HONEST WITH YOU?

GO AHEAD. WE'RE TIGHT.

OKAY. YOU AND ASH GETTING BACKTOGETHER?

THE STUPIDEST IDEAI EVER HEARD.

WHAT?

WELL, YOU BECOME THIS WEAK,

PATHETIC PUPPET WHEN SHE'SAROUND.

AND SHE'S THE EVIL PUPPETMASTER.

HERE THIS IS YOU -

ASHLEY I DON'T WHAT TO GO...

[WHIPPING SOUND] OKAY,OKAY I'M GOING.

OW, THAT HURTS. OW.

OKAY, OKAY I GET IT.

THANKS FOR THE HONESTY.

DUDE? MY PLEASURE.

LOOK I'M SORRY,OKAY?

I APOLOGIZE.

THANK YOU.

THAT'S' IT?

PARDON ME.

I APOLOGIZED.WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?

JT DO YOU KNOW WHY I'M ANGRY?

BECAUSE OF THE THING I DID.

YES. BUT DO YOU KNOWWHY I'M REALLY ANGRY?

NO.

LOOK, YOU'RE FUNNY, OKAY?

BUT YOU'RE ALSO VERYINTELLIGENT,

AND YOU'RE JUST WASTING IT BYALWAYS BEING THE CLASS CLOWN.

JUST WASTING IT.

WELL THEN I'LL JUST STOPWASTING YOUR TIME.

I'LL TRANSFER OUTOF YOUR CLASS.

WELL YOU DO WHAT EVER IT ISYOU NEED TO DO.

WHAT'RE YOU DOING?SCHOOL'S OUT.

IT'S AN HONESTY LISTABOUT SPINNER.

ARE YOU CRAZY?

NO, IT'S CONSTRUCTIVECRITICISM.

"YOU'RE CHEAP."VERY CONSTRUCTIVE.

OKAY, DON'T MAKE MESTART A TERRI LIST.

TOP ITEM? NOSEY -DOESN'T MIND OWN BUSINESS.

OH GREAT. HELLO?

OH NO!

MS. H!

MS. HATZILAKOS.

MS. H!

I'M ON MY WAY OUT.

YEAH I KNOW.BUT I NEED YOUR HELP.

WELL MY OFFICE IS OPEN EARLYTOMORROW.

NO, IT'S ISABELLA.SHE GOT OUT OF HER CAGE.

WHAT? OH NO!

I WAS JUST ON MY WAYTO CLEAN THE ROOM

AND THE DOOR WAS LOCKED.

I WAS JUST WALKING BY

AND I SAW THAT SHE WAS UNDERNEATH THE DESK.

THE CAGE...

WAIT. THERE SHE IS. OKAY.

SHHH, LET'S BE VERY QUIET.

OKAY.

CLOSE THE DOOR BEHIND YOU.

ALL RIGHT.

TRY NOT TO SCARE HER.

COME ON ISABELLA.

I'LL TRY TO PUSH HERTOWARDS YOU.

THAT'S A GOOD GIRL. COME ON.

OH! SH--.

GO! GO! YOU GO THAT WAY.

GO THAT WAY.

OH, THERE SHE IS.

QUIET.

I GOT HER, I GOT HER,I GOT HER, I GOT HER.

OW!

OH MY ELBOW!

THERE SHE IS.

WHERE DID SHE GO?

RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THERE.

WHERE DID SHE GO?

LOOKS LIKE SHE JUST FOUNDA DARK, SAFE SPOT

TO HAVE HER BABIES.

THAT'S WHAT THEY LIKE TO DO.

I DID SOME GUINEA PIG RESEARCHON THE COMPUTER.

SHE'S NOT SAFE, JT.

THE JANITOR'S SPREAD RAT POISONALL AROUND THE SCHOOL.

BECAUSE OF RODENT PROBLEMS...

WHAT?!

ISABELLA! COME ON!

16. DANCES LIKE A STUPID ROBOT. 17. BAD TASTE IN MOVIES.

AND 18. SHOOTS BASKETS LIKE A GIRL.

OKAY, DUDE ARE YOU DONE?

UM. ONE MORE THING. YOU SAY'DUDE' LIKE EVERY THIRD WORD.

OH YEAH? WELL YOUHAVE A SHINY FOREHEAD, DUDE.

WHAT?

AND... CAN YOUSTOP COPYING ME?

YOU'RE THE ONETHAT COPIES ME.

OKAY, POPPY-SEEDBAGELS!

THE SEEDS STICKTO YOUR TEETH

AND YOU WALK AROUND ALL DAYLIKE SOME POPPY-TOOTHED FREAK.

SHRIMP CHIPS!

THEY MAKE YOU STINK UPTHE CHANGEROOM.

SHRIMP AND B.O.

YOU'RE A BUM AND YOU HANG OUTAT MY HOUSE TOO MUCH.

THAT'S BECAUSE YOU PEEON THE TOILET SEAT!

MY MOM DOESN'T WANT YOU OVER!

WHAT!

COME ON ISABELLA, COME ON.

THIS IS ALLMY FAULT -

I THINK I LEFT HER CAGEOPEN WHEN I FED HER.

NO, NO, IT'S NOTYOUR FAULT.

COME ON!

I CAN'T QUITEREACH HER.

WELL IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKESHE'S COMING OUT ANY TIME SOON.

LOOK JT I CAN STAY,

YOU CAN GO.

NO.

LOOK, CAN YOU CALL MY PARENTS?

TELL THEM I'M STAYING HEREUNTIL ISABELLA COMES OUT.

OKAY, BUT THIS COULD TAKEAWHILE.

THAT'S OKAY,

COME ON.

MAYBE WE HAVE TOLURE HER OUT.

MAKE IT SEEMMORE COMFORTABLE OUT HERE.

IT'S HOPELESS.

IF I WASN'T SO TIRED.

I SAW ON THE NET THAT THEY LIKESOFT MUSIC AND LOW LIGHTS.

HEY, YOU EVER WONDER WHY THEYCALL THEM GUINEA PIGS?

I MEAN, THEY'RE NOT FROM GUINEAAND THEY'RE NOT PIGS.

THEY'RE RODENTS.

EXACTLY. IT'S LIKE QUICKSAND.

THEY CALL IT QUICK-SAND,

BUT IT ACTUALLY WORKS REALLYREALLY SLOWLY.

AND A BOXING RING IS SQUARE.

STAND-UP COMIC, HUH?

ALL RIGHT, I CAN SEE IT.

SO SHOULD I GIVE UP MY DREAMSOF VET-HOOD?

NO, YOU SHOULD DO EXACTLYWHAT IT IS THAT YOU WANT DO.

BUT MAKE SURE YOU GRADUATE FROM SCHOOL FIRST.

WERE YOU ALWAYS A SCIENCETEACHER?

I MEAN, NEVER A - A MODEL?

NO. TEACHING IS MY LIFE, JT.

AND THAT'S WHY WHAT YOU DID -REALLY HURT ME.

I'M SORRY OKAY.

I REALLY AM.

UH JT, YOUR PLAN WORKED.

LOOK.

HEY.

CLOSE THE DOOR.

ALL RIGHT,GOOD JOB.

UM YEAH -YOUR IDEA SUCKED.

YEAH. THE TRUTH DOES HURT.

OKAY, LET'S TAKE OUT YOURCOPIES OF "THE CHRYSALIDS".

GENTLEMEN?IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG?

UM... NO NOTHINGAT ALL - HONEST.

YEAH WE WEREJUST TALKING ABOUT

HOW STUNNING YOU LOOKTODAY, MS. KWAN.

OKAY, LET'S START WITHTHE THEME.

YOU KNOW I WASN'T REALLY GOINGTO TRANSFER OUT OF YOUR CLASS?

REALLY? MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE.

THE TOUGH PART OF THE TERMSTARTS TODAY.

I'VE GOT A KILLER POP QUIZ.

GOTCHA.

OKAY HOW DID EVERY ONE DO WITH THEIR HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT?

HEY.

I HEARD YOU HAD A LITTLE"QUALITY TIME" LAST NIGHT

WITH MS. HOT SAUCE.

YEAH SO THROW USA BONE HERE.

WHAT HAPPENED?

LAST NIGHT?WELL THE LIGHTS WERE DIMMED.

SOFT MUSIC PLAYED ON THE RADIO.

WE JUST LOOKED INTOEACH OTHER'S EYES.

I MEAN, WE WERETHIS CLOSE.

AND...

AND...

IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.

ISABELLA CRAWLED IN HER CAGE

AND HAD HER BABIES FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER.

THAT'S IT?

THAT'S ALL?

HEY GUINEA PIG CHILDBIRTH ISA VERY EXCITING PROCESS, GUYS.

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