All language subtitles for My.Favorite.Martian.S01E20.My.Nephew.the.Artist.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-NTb

(cheerful music)

- Hey, that's not bad.

That's not bad at all.

Who's style you
using, Rembrandt?

Picasso?

Modigliani?

- Van Gogh.

- You knew him too?

- Knew him, who do
you think told him

to cut of his ear
for his sweetheart?

- I've got a lot to learn
about being a friend.

- Oh I did it for his own good,

he wanted to cut off his nose.

- Guy was really
feeling down, huh?

- Yeah, he's not the only one.

- Oh come on Uncle
Martin, oh I've asked you.

Please snap out of it.

- Oh Tim, how do
you think I feel?

You've extended
yourself on my behalf

and I can't raise a
dime in appreciation.

- Oh forget it.

- Well it isn't right,
it isn't right for you

to carry the whole load.

- Uncle Martin look, someday
when the Crosstown Bus

goes into orbit, I will visit
your planet and you can show

me some good old fashioned
Martian hospitality.

Now will you please go back
to your painting and...

Come on, cheer up.

- I'll try.

- Okay.

- I thought you
were gonna paint.

- Huh, Oh I am.

- You are a great painter.

- Yes, but my wallet is empty.

- Who's counting?
I'll see you later.

- Thanks.

- Great painter, hah.

If I were a great
painter I could

sell my paintings and I could...

Hmm...

Why not!

(beeping)

(beeping)

- Just look at the
integrity that went

into that painting madame.

You could almost
smell the roses.

- Look mister, when I see
what I want I'll let you know.

I don't like a pushy art dealer.

- May I help you sir?

- Yes, I'm looking
for Mr. Green.

- Don't tell me, I know.

You're an artist and want
to sell me that painting.

- My eagerness gave me away.

- No, the hungry
look on your face.

- Well I'll have to eat a double
breakfast tomorrow morning.

- It can't be...

There's only one Van Gogh.

- Yes, I have attempted
to copy his style I admit.

- Why this could've been
painted by Van Gogh himself.

The same bold strokes,
the same fire.

- Yes, I remember
Vincent telling me--

- Vincent?

- Uh, Vincent Pascuelli,
he's my butcher.

- This painting mister...

- O'Hara, it's signed in
the lower right-hand corner.

- This painting has
depth and meaning.

- Thank you.

- I remember Da Vinci
saying, death and meaning...

Tony Davinci, he's a friend
of Vincent Pascuelli's.

- I'd like to sell
this painting for you.

I think you have something
to say as an artist.

And if I could help
further your career,

I'd feel I was
contributing to society.

- Thank you very much Mr. Green,

that's a marvelous attitude.

- I'll divide the
proceeds with you.

Is that fair?

- That's very fair,
thank you very much.

- Mr. Green, why don't you
offer that lady my painting.

I have a feeling she'll like it.

- Listen, I'm in a
hurry and I can't get

that door open so would you--

- Just the right thing
for a bedroom, I'd say.

- That's just what
I was thinking.

- But in all fairness
madame, I wouldn't suggest

this painting unless
your bedspread

were baby blue with
fringes of yellow.

- Well that's just what it is.

How much?

I'm not spending a dollar over
40, if it is I have to tell

my husband I bought it for less.

- $40? Madame, artists
are human beings.

- My husband isn't.

- Very well, $40.

Thank you madame.

- Don't mention it.

(gasps)

- Mister O'Hara,
it looked as though

you were reading
that woman's mind.

- How hard it is
to read a blank.

Thank you, thank you very much.

(phone rings)

- Hello?

- Mister O'Hara, good news!

Your paintings are
moving wonderfully.

How soon can you let
me have some more?

- Quite soon.

- Mister O'Hara, I can't
tell you how excited

I am to think I've been
instrumental, in some small way,

in bringing you to the
attention of the public.

Good bye for now!

- Good bye, and
thank you very much.

- Um, I uh, do you think
you could get him to paint

me a Gainsborough
for my bathroom?

- Madame, Mister O'Hara
is not a bathroom painter.

He's a great craftsman, and
I intend to encourage him.

Why I'm going to surprise
him with a showing

of his own paintings.

- A showing for whom?

- O'Hara, see this art
dealer I know called

and asked me a favor to
include a piece in our article

about a new friend of his,
an artist named O'Hara.

And didn't think there
was any relation.

- Well did this man happen to
mention O'Hara's first name?

- All Green said was that
the artist's name was O'Hara.

You know this last name
stuff only for artists.

Like Rembrandt, Van Gogh,
Lautrec, any relation?

- No Mr. Burns, no there's
no Lautrec in my family.

- Come on, I meant is this
O'Hara artist related to you?

- Well I have a
large family tree.

Maybe one of the twigs
fell off the branch?

How can you have a showing?

I mean all that publicity,
people asking questions.

Now what are you
gonna tell them?

"Well I paint like Rembrandt
because I'm 450 years old

"and I come from Mars."

- That would raise a few
eyebrows, wouldn't it.

- Eyebrows? It'd raise scalps.

- Well I had no idea Mr. Green
was planing a showing for me.

- None of this wouldn't
have happened if you hadn't

insisted on helping
me with the expenses.

- That proves it.

- Proves what?

- That the road to Pluto is
paved with good intensions.

- Oh, well down here that
road leads somewhere else.

Will you stop painting?

- Look what you did!

Uh oh.

- What?

- It's him.

- Who?

- The little man who's
innocently boiling me in oil.

- I just had to come over
personally to surprise you.

Guess what?

- What?

- You're having a
showing of your work

at my gallery tomorrow.

And Mr. Bentley, the great
art expert of them all,

has agreed to come.

- Mr. Bentley?

- Yes, if he gives you
his stamp of approval,

you're on your way.

- I'm on my way right now.

- Oh Tim, I want you
to meet Mr. Green.

- Mr. Green, this
is my nephew, Tim.

The real artist who
painted all the paintings

you admire so much.

- You do?

- Yes it's not I, but
my talented nephew

who's at ease at the easel.

- Um, I...

- Now, now. Don't deny it Tim.

I can't credit for
something I did not do.

- Uh, uh, uh...

- I don't understand.

You said that you
did the paintings.

- Well I'm afraid I
was trying to bask

in the spotlight of
my nephew Mr. Green.

- I understand, but
if he's your nephew

you can at least stand in
the shadow of greatness.

- Well it was almost
the truth, anyway.

The paintings are signed
by O'Hara and this

is the real O'Hara, eh Tim?

- Well I, um...

- See how modest he is?

Tim this is your big chance.

- I pass.

- No, no, no.

- Well you just have
to have that showing.

I've invited everyone.

After all these years, to
think that I, personally,

have discovered a great genius.

- Be at ease, Mr. Green.

My nephew, the painter
will be there tomorrow

to take his bows and stand
proudly beside his paintings.

- It's a lucky day
for me when your uncle

walked into my life.

I shall never forget it.

- Neither will I.

- Tim? Tim?

Now you come out of that closet.

- Go away! I am not here.

- Tim! Tim!

Now I'll tell you that you
can go to the art showing

and no one will know that you
didn't paint those paintings.

- I told you, I. Am. Not. Here!

- Tim!

Alright Tim, I'm going to leave

and you will never be
bothered by me again.

- Uncle Martin?

Uncle Martin?

- Surprise!

- Sneak!

Uncle Martin look, how
could you expect me

to go to that art show tonight?

- Tim, when are you
earthlings going to learn

that man's most
precious commodity

is his dignity, his pride.

Would you rob a nice
little man like Mr. Green

of his supreme moment?

Would you deprive
him on introducing

to the world a great artist?

- You make it sound as
if I were walking around

kicking little puppies.

- Hmmhmm, well until you
Earth people learn to respect

the finer aspects of
mankind, you're going

to remain exactly what you are.

A bunch of two-legged
mental midgets.

- You want me to go
stand on the corner?

- No, stand tall.

- Uncle Martin, I do
not know the first thing

about art, now suppose
somebody walks up to me

and asks me question.

- Don't answer and
look intelligent.

- Oh that'll never work.

- Of course it will,
all you have to do

is look like a
genius, like this.

- Marvelous display of color.

What colors did you mix?

- Brown, yellow and green.
Diluted to a thin perfection.

- It was so nice of you to come.

Mr. Bentley, here is
my talented discovery.

- No, we are in the
presence of genius.

- That remains to be seen.

- You doubt that the artist
who fathered these paintings

is endowed with genius sir?

- Not at all, that's
why I was being careful.

- I can quite understand
Mr. Bentley's reluctance

to be persuaded so rapidly.

After all, when Mr. Bentley
puts his stamp of approval

on an artist, he's accepted as
a major talent of the world.

- Come on Uncle Martin,
you wanna take me home?

I had a rough day at the easel.

- Oh come now, don't
tell us that our genius

doubts his talent?

- My nephew is insulted,
and rightly so.

That you have cast dispersions
on the name of O'Hara.

- Oh not at all sir.

But since the name O'Hara
is on all of these marvelous

paintings, how indeed
can we tell that one man

painted them all?

- Let's go put my
brushes to bed.

- No, no.

Mr. Bentley, there are those
who say that Shakespeare

did not author his great works.

And even those who
doubt that the world

was made in six days.

- Oh, were you there sir?

- I was.

That is I was about to
say that one man did paint

all of these paintings
and I can, that is,

he can prove it.

- I'm sure that Mr.
O'Hara understands

your skepticism Mr. Bently.

But the solution
is quite simple.

- It is?

- Why yes, you can paint
in the style of the masters

before his very eyes.

- Well that seems
like a very fair test.

- We accept.

And once more he'll do
five paintings at once.

- Oh, I'm so proud of you.

- Eight o'clock,
tomorrow night, here.

- Mr. O'Hara will be here.

- And can hardly wait.

- You're very lucky young man.

Most of the masters die
before they had a chance

to prove their talent.

- Lucky.

I mean it's lucky
that I'm alive.

- The name of O'Hara the
artist will live forever.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

- How can I paint five
pictures for Mr. Bentley

when I can't even paint at all!?

- Well let's see.

- Oh brother, just 'cause
I'm holding a brush

doesn't mean that--

Hey, you're controlling my hand.

- No, I'm actually
controlling the brush.

You're just going
along for the ride.

- I'm a painter! I'm a painter!

- That's what we're going
to prove to Mr. Bentley.

- Well don't stop now
Uncle Martin, come on,

I wanna see what the
picture's gonna be.

- Ah...

My public.

- That's right Jim,
you're in command here.

You're going to be...

Great.

- Getting a cold?

- I dunno, I suddenly
started getting, stuffy.

- Ah genius, I have five
easels set up for you.

- Ah, splendid.

- There's Mr. O'Hara
darling, and you said

he wouldn't show up.

- Frankly my dear, I
didn't think he would.

- Well did Robert
Fulton show up?

(laughs)

- Mr. Green, uh, will you
take us to the easels please?

- Right this way.

- Twig off the branch, eh?

- Mr. Burns, what
are you doing here?

- He's an art lover.

- I'm an art lover.

- And he's curious
about the name O'Hara

- And I'm curious--

- Uh, that's just a lucky guess.

- Jim, is that why you were
so evasive back in my office?

Why didn't you tell
me you were the O'Hara

that Green was raving about?

- Oh well, I...

- Don't tell me, I know.

You want to quit your job.

- I want to quit my job?

- I don't blame you my boy.

Anyone who could paint
like you should devote

all his time to art.

- Uncle Martin...

- Ah, don't say it, I know.
I just read your mind.

Such language.

- What am I gonna do?

If I don't go through with this,

I'm gonna disgrace nice Mr.
Green, if I do go through

with it, I lose my job.

- Well I'll say
you're in a pickle.

- And you marinated me.

- I like the way
you turn a phrase.

- What am I going to do?

- You'll see.

- Now, I'll leave it to
Mr. Bentley to choose

which artists I should emulate.

- Rembrandt, Lautrec,
Picasso, Gauguin and Van Gogh.

- Child's play.

- Pardon me ladies
and gentlemen,

but I must take a moment to
reflect before I jump in.

- Our genius seems reluctant.

- What's holding us up?

- My battery's dead.

- What!?

What?

- Don't you hear
how nasal I sound?

I'm allergic to
something in this room,

and I can't use my
levitation finger.

- Well why not?

- Well my sensitivity's
all fouled up,

- Well unfoul it, have
you seen that group

of vultures out there?

- I can't unfoul it,
not until I found out

what I'm sensitive to, then
I got to get rid of it.

- Well what am I gonna do?

- Stall 'em.

- What?

- Stall 'em?

- Stall? Stall. Stall!

I never should've gotten
out of the closet.

Well now, I suppose you're
all wondering about me,

who I am, where I was born,
well that's only natural.

I was born in Toledo.

I was a very health baby,

I-I was six pounds
and nine ounces.

Or was it nine pounds
and six ounces?

- Is that really important?

- Well it was to my mother.

- Darling, I think you
were right after all.

- Certainly appears that way.

- Tim, start painting.

- I remember now, yes!

It was six pounds
and nine ounces.

Of course I got a
little bit bigger

as my formula would change.

It won't be long now folks.

Now where was I?

- I believe you were
on your formula.

- And I believe we're leaving.

- You can't, you just can't.

- What are you doing?

- Oh madame, one of
Mr. O'Hara's intentions

is to paint you in
the style of Van Gogh,

didn't he tell you?

- That's right?

- What does that have to do
with you taking my flower?

- Well now madame,
don't be modest.

Mr. O'Hara knows that a
subject with such character

and beauty would
never allow herself

to be painted with a flower.

After all, why
divert the observer.

Why compete with nature?

- Are you really gonna
paint me in Van Gogh style?

- Am I? I mean yes I am.

- Young man, you have
stalled long enough.

- I never really did
think he had any talent.

- I believe that Mr.
O'Hara is now ready to show

you that he's
loaded with talent.

- Ladies and gentlemen!

- Rather jerky style.

- Who knows how a genius
paints, Mr. Bentley?

(laughs)

- Why, he's doing it.

- I see it, but I
don't believe it.

(laughs)

- That's my boy!

- Amazing!

Gauguin, Van Gogh, Picasso,
Lautrec, Rembrandt.

- What did you expect
sir, chopped liver!?

I'm an artist!

- I envy your moment Mr. Green,

you've given the
world a major talent.

- I had been privileged.

- Ah, something always
told me Tim was great.

No more newspaper work
for you, eh genius?

- Yeah, yeah, that's great...

- But our genius has saved
the best news for last.

Tell them Tim.

- Well I, uh, uh...

You tell them Uncle Martin.

- You have all inspired
him so that my nephew

has reached a
cataclysmic decision.

- Do tell us?

- Err...

- Still shy?

Tim has decided that he no
longer wishes to imitate

the masters, he his
forsaking imitation forever.

(crowd murmurs)

Now, now, now.

Tim has decided to
strike out on his own,

to develop his own unique style.

- Wonderful.

- Tim, why don't you demonstrate
your new approach to art?

- Uh, you think I should?

- Definitely. Go right
ahead, there's an easel.

- If you say so Uncle Martin.

- Marvelous, what a beautiful
specimen of O'Haraism.

Such daring style, such
a definite likeness.

- Definite likeness of what?

- Why of you, Mr. Burns.

- Me?

- Yes, Tim just
painted your portrait.

Mr. Bentley, where do
you think something

like this should be hung?

- I wouldn't hang
it, I'd throw it.

- Son, you better show up at
the office for work tomorrow.

You paint like that,
you're gonna starve.

- I respect your opinion sir.

- You better put in
some over time too,

you're gonna need the money.

- Uncle Martin look, do
me a great, big favor

and make me a promise.

Never try to earn
any money to help me.

I can't afford it.

- Alright, but it's gonna
be a little difficult

for me to write checks on
the Mars National Bank.