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1
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Ooh! Ooh...
2
00:00:06,300 --> 00:00:07,632
Previously on Kidding...
3
00:00:07,633 --> 00:00:08,925
I think I killed Peter.
4
00:00:08,926 --> 00:00:10,589
Peter is in critical condition.
5
00:00:10,590 --> 00:00:12,210
When Jill comes back, I'm
gonna tell her everything.
6
00:00:12,213 --> 00:00:13,829
Under no circumstances
7
00:00:13,830 --> 00:00:15,219
should you tell her.
8
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He needs a new liver within two days
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00:00:16,892 --> 00:00:18,379
or it will fail.
10
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I'm a universal donor.
Just say the word.
11
00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:21,769
Why do you want to do this?
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Because it's important
to do the right thing.
13
00:00:23,649 --> 00:00:26,068
Peter didn't walk into traffic.
14
00:00:27,020 --> 00:00:29,560
I... fucked up.
15
00:00:32,116 --> 00:00:34,079
That's a dick.
16
00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:36,060
Wait until she puts on the shoes.
17
00:00:36,070 --> 00:00:39,419
Mm. Now it's a dick wearing shoes.
18
00:00:39,420 --> 00:00:40,929
We have research that shows
19
00:00:40,930 --> 00:00:43,090
that children who enjoy this toy
20
00:00:43,093 --> 00:00:46,296
are 43% more likely to
eat their vegetables.
21
00:00:46,297 --> 00:00:47,979
Well, my research shows
22
00:00:47,980 --> 00:00:49,859
that children who enjoy this toy
23
00:00:49,860 --> 00:00:54,429
are 43% more likely to eat a dick.
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00:00:54,430 --> 00:00:56,630
Jeff's Christmas tree lighting speech
25
00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,549
was... a lot of things,
26
00:00:58,550 --> 00:01:01,279
but mainly, it was a brilliant ad
27
00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:02,889
for Talk-To-Me Pickles.
28
00:01:02,890 --> 00:01:06,179
Every child in America wanted that toy.
29
00:01:06,180 --> 00:01:08,399
But we can't rest on our laurels.
30
00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,809
To quote our best-selling
product: "I'm listening."
31
00:01:11,810 --> 00:01:14,399
Listening to the market
demand for a follow-up toy
32
00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:15,701
like Play-With-Me Pickles.
33
00:01:15,702 --> 00:01:17,379
I'm sorry, but neither of you were here
34
00:01:17,380 --> 00:01:20,619
for the great Pickle
Wiggler fiasco of 1993.
35
00:01:20,620 --> 00:01:23,460
Picture that thing,
but vibrating and free,
36
00:01:23,465 --> 00:01:25,909
at the bottom of a cereal box.
37
00:01:25,910 --> 00:01:28,547
No, you don't want this on your hands
38
00:01:28,548 --> 00:01:30,979
or in theirs, for that matter.
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00:01:30,980 --> 00:01:32,343
Think of something else.
40
00:01:33,780 --> 00:01:36,479
- Stop touching them together.
- That's a good start.
41
00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:38,540
Look, we can put out any toy you want,
42
00:01:38,550 --> 00:01:41,642
but we can't sell albums
if the band's not on tour.
43
00:01:41,643 --> 00:01:44,019
- That's the bigger issue.
- I promise you,
44
00:01:44,020 --> 00:01:47,399
Puppet Time will be back on
the air within six months.
45
00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:48,609
You have my word.
46
00:01:48,610 --> 00:01:50,419
That's probably another offer
47
00:01:50,420 --> 00:01:52,849
coming through even as
we speak... excuse me.
48
00:01:52,850 --> 00:01:54,850
Yes?
49
00:01:57,509 --> 00:01:58,826
Jeff did what?
50
00:02:03,110 --> 00:02:08,109
Subtitles by explosiveskull
Corrected by MementMori
51
00:02:27,439 --> 00:02:30,870
When Phil died...
52
00:02:30,873 --> 00:02:33,737
did you donate his
organs to other people?
53
00:02:34,950 --> 00:02:36,240
No, we didn't.
54
00:02:37,940 --> 00:02:39,950
W-why not?
55
00:02:39,952 --> 00:02:42,249
You know how your father is.
56
00:02:42,250 --> 00:02:44,449
Anyone whose life he touches
57
00:02:44,450 --> 00:02:46,874
becomes another member of the family.
58
00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:49,379
If we gave Phil's lungs to someone,
59
00:02:49,380 --> 00:02:50,399
your dad'd just end up
60
00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:52,940
paying for that guy's
kid to go to college,
61
00:02:52,941 --> 00:02:54,839
painting his house.
62
00:02:54,840 --> 00:02:56,479
I didn't want that.
63
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,119
And on the 12th day of Christmas,
64
00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:01,859
my true love gave to
me 60% of his liver.
65
00:03:01,860 --> 00:03:04,139
For more on one gift that
certainly won't be returned
66
00:03:04,140 --> 00:03:06,500
this holiday season,
we go live to Saint...
67
00:03:08,682 --> 00:03:11,149
For what it's worth, I told him to lie.
68
00:03:11,150 --> 00:03:13,640
For what it's worth, I wish he had.
69
00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:17,260
We'll be beginning the procedure soon
70
00:03:17,270 --> 00:03:20,290
if you'd like to see your
husband beforehand.
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00:03:20,297 --> 00:03:22,600
Or your boyfriend.
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00:03:24,180 --> 00:03:26,159
I'll be back.
73
00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:27,819
Here.
74
00:03:27,820 --> 00:03:30,599
Twenty bucks... buy yourself
a soda or something.
75
00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:34,190
Have you ever thought that
maybe this is all your fault?
76
00:03:34,194 --> 00:03:36,989
For calling him a pussy so many times?
77
00:03:36,990 --> 00:03:40,220
Not until you said something.
78
00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:43,340
Which one do you think is gonna die?
79
00:03:56,260 --> 00:03:57,540
If Peter wakes up,
80
00:03:57,544 --> 00:03:59,322
do you think she'll talk to me again?
81
00:03:59,323 --> 00:04:01,509
Maybe.
82
00:04:01,510 --> 00:04:02,785
Through her lawyer.
83
00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:04,577
Hmm.
84
00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:06,246
I'll talk to her.
85
00:04:07,958 --> 00:04:09,510
What are you gonna say?
86
00:04:09,519 --> 00:04:11,789
I'll make things right, I promise.
87
00:04:11,790 --> 00:04:15,159
Jeff, I'm Dr. Labanc, your
surgeon for the procedure.
88
00:04:15,160 --> 00:04:16,199
- Hello.
- This is Dr. Gimple,
89
00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:17,423
your anesthesiologist.
90
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:19,730
He's subbing in today from County.
91
00:04:19,733 --> 00:04:22,319
Mr. Pickles, you can
feel anything at all...
92
00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:23,510
except on my watch.
93
00:04:23,514 --> 00:04:25,139
Ah...
94
00:04:25,140 --> 00:04:26,780
Okay to wheel you in?
95
00:04:26,782 --> 00:04:27,975
Yes.
96
00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:29,560
De-liver me.
97
00:04:31,468 --> 00:04:33,109
I'll be here when you wake up.
98
00:04:33,110 --> 00:04:34,899
Talk to her.
99
00:04:46,808 --> 00:04:50,090
He looks so peaceful.
100
00:04:50,093 --> 00:04:52,939
Oh, he's in a lotta pain.
101
00:04:52,940 --> 00:04:54,560
Is there a particular kind of music
102
00:04:54,570 --> 00:04:56,379
you'd like to have on
during the procedure?
103
00:04:56,380 --> 00:05:00,499
I'm partial to Brahms's
Hungarian Dance No. 2.
104
00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:04,560
You know, they say he composed
his best piece for the organ.
105
00:05:04,570 --> 00:05:07,360
But they never said which organ.
106
00:05:09,116 --> 00:05:12,239
Is that a liver joke or a penis joke?
107
00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:14,350
Oh, it's both.
108
00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:16,679
Okay, Mr. Pickles,
109
00:05:16,680 --> 00:05:19,270
I need you to breathe
in through your nose.
110
00:05:19,278 --> 00:05:21,370
And count down from ten for me.
111
00:05:22,694 --> 00:05:24,690
Ten...
112
00:05:24,697 --> 00:05:26,809
- nine...
- By the way,
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00:05:26,810 --> 00:05:29,499
my son really enjoyed
your Christmas speech.
114
00:05:29,500 --> 00:05:33,159
- Hmm?
- I didn't much care for it.
115
00:05:33,160 --> 00:05:34,580
Wait...
116
00:05:34,589 --> 00:05:35,918
That's it.
117
00:05:35,919 --> 00:05:38,900
Breathe in. Eight...
118
00:05:40,220 --> 00:05:42,559
seven...
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00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:44,920
six...
120
00:05:44,923 --> 00:05:46,999
five...
121
00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:48,140
four...
122
00:05:50,140 --> 00:05:52,599
- Three...
- How do I get back up?
123
00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:55,146
- Two...
- How do I get back up?
124
00:05:55,147 --> 00:05:58,023
- One.
- How do I get back up?
125
00:05:58,024 --> 00:06:00,359
See you at the bottom.
126
00:06:33,100 --> 00:06:34,602
Oh, God, there he is!
127
00:06:34,603 --> 00:06:36,519
Be quiet, you foolish man!
128
00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:38,200
Hello?
129
00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:41,769
Secret Chef.
130
00:06:41,770 --> 00:06:43,319
Snagglehorse? Is that you?
131
00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:45,759
Uhh! You... You stay away from us!
132
00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:47,229
He's got a knife!
133
00:06:47,230 --> 00:06:49,867
He's going to murder us all,
like that handsome doctor!
134
00:06:49,868 --> 00:06:52,199
No, no, no! It's just me.
135
00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:54,079
Please come out.
136
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:57,499
I could never hurt you.
You're my best friends!
137
00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:58,620
He doesn't have a knife.
138
00:06:58,630 --> 00:07:00,059
I was wrong about the knife thing.
139
00:07:00,060 --> 00:07:02,338
Word of the day in Pickle Barrel Falls
140
00:07:02,339 --> 00:07:03,882
is vehicular manslaughter!
141
00:07:03,883 --> 00:07:05,800
How do I get up the falls?
142
00:07:05,801 --> 00:07:07,674
Gettin' up the falls is easy. You...
143
00:07:07,675 --> 00:07:09,479
Don't tell him! It's a trick!
144
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,847
I have to get back to my family.
145
00:07:11,848 --> 00:07:14,058
Oh, God, he's going to kill his family!
146
00:07:14,059 --> 00:07:16,060
Don't kill your family, Mr. Pickles.
147
00:07:16,061 --> 00:07:18,520
Please! I need to make
it right with them...
148
00:07:18,524 --> 00:07:20,314
so they're not scared of me too.
149
00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:23,009
Maybe they ssshould be ssscared of you.
150
00:07:23,010 --> 00:07:26,445
You sssnow-plowed an anesthesiologist!
151
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,739
Wait!
152
00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:31,701
Your rocket... is that
how I get up the falls?
153
00:07:31,702 --> 00:07:33,419
Don't tell him! If he gets out,
154
00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:34,779
he'll surely kill again!
155
00:07:34,780 --> 00:07:37,489
Please, Astronotter,
let me borrow your rocket.
156
00:07:37,490 --> 00:07:38,624
- No, no, no!
- Don't let him!
157
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:40,679
He'll nuke us all to oblivion!
158
00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:42,086
- Zzz, zzz!
- Wait!
159
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:44,629
- Ennui?
- Au revoir, cocksucker!
160
00:07:44,630 --> 00:07:45,779
Pardon my French!
161
00:07:45,780 --> 00:07:48,299
Good-bye, cocksucker!
162
00:07:59,780 --> 00:08:02,232
_
163
00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:11,030
"Dear Jeff and Deirdre,
164
00:08:11,032 --> 00:08:13,269
I found a place that makes me happy.
165
00:08:13,270 --> 00:08:15,160
Love, Mom."
166
00:08:15,170 --> 00:08:16,550
What does it mean?
167
00:08:16,559 --> 00:08:17,949
It means she found somewhere happy
168
00:08:17,950 --> 00:08:19,499
because she wasn't happy here.
169
00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:21,479
It means she's never coming back.
170
00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:22,779
That's not true.
171
00:08:22,780 --> 00:08:24,239
Moms never get to have fun.
172
00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:25,779
That's why I'm never going to have kids.
173
00:08:25,780 --> 00:08:28,579
I wanna see a place
that makes Mom so happy
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00:08:28,580 --> 00:08:30,509
- she'd choose that over us.
- You don't get it!
175
00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:33,387
She'd have chosen anywhere over us.
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00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:35,140
No.
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00:08:35,143 --> 00:08:37,700
I don't think so.
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00:08:37,707 --> 00:08:40,020
Must be wonderful there.
179
00:08:40,029 --> 00:08:42,105
Bet it's only a couple days' walk.
180
00:08:43,874 --> 00:08:45,191
Idiot.
181
00:08:57,531 --> 00:08:58,850
Where's your brother?
182
00:08:58,853 --> 00:09:00,449
Niagara Falls.
183
00:09:00,450 --> 00:09:01,719
What?
184
00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:02,876
Jeff!
185
00:09:02,890 --> 00:09:06,519
Jeffrey! Jeffrey.
186
00:09:06,520 --> 00:09:09,239
Jeffrey, you need to come
home before it gets dark.
187
00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:11,060
Jeez!
188
00:09:11,069 --> 00:09:12,539
How do I get there?
189
00:09:12,540 --> 00:09:13,870
Where?
190
00:09:13,873 --> 00:09:15,549
Tell me how to get to the falls...
191
00:09:15,550 --> 00:09:16,839
or I'll shoot you in the face!
192
00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:19,101
I see... it's all my fault, isn't it?
193
00:09:19,102 --> 00:09:21,259
- You made her leave!
- Your mom's a manic depressive
194
00:09:21,260 --> 00:09:24,549
who once fed you nothing
but ice cubes for three days.
195
00:09:24,550 --> 00:09:25,560
Come on, let's go.
196
00:09:25,568 --> 00:09:26,760
Ow!
197
00:09:26,769 --> 00:09:28,209
Ow...
198
00:09:28,210 --> 00:09:29,799
You could have taken my eye out.
199
00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:31,810
- I wish I had!
- Get up, we're going home.
200
00:09:31,816 --> 00:09:33,890
Ow! Ohh...
201
00:09:33,898 --> 00:09:36,099
I hate you, I hate you!
202
00:09:36,100 --> 00:09:37,959
I don't want to live
with you ever again!
203
00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:39,539
Get it out, come on, get it all out,
204
00:09:39,540 --> 00:09:42,429
because next time, I'm hitting back.
205
00:09:42,430 --> 00:09:44,190
Uhh!
206
00:09:48,237 --> 00:09:50,479
Here, take my hand.
207
00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:53,750
Take my hand, and let's go home.
208
00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:56,419
Ohh!
209
00:09:56,420 --> 00:09:58,369
I'm going to the falls!
210
00:10:09,144 --> 00:10:11,020
Let's go home.
211
00:10:14,071 --> 00:10:15,569
Aah!
212
00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:21,359
This is the most beautiful
liver I've ever seen.
213
00:10:31,460 --> 00:10:35,000
Honestly, what do you
think his chances are?
214
00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:39,010
Flip a coin.
215
00:10:45,100 --> 00:10:46,799
Oh...
216
00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:48,809
Aaah!
217
00:10:48,810 --> 00:10:51,300
Aaaah! Oh, no!
218
00:10:51,310 --> 00:10:53,299
Oh... oh... ohhhhh!
219
00:10:53,300 --> 00:10:56,319
Aaah!
220
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:58,799
Ohh...
221
00:10:58,800 --> 00:10:59,825
Peter?
222
00:11:01,773 --> 00:11:03,170
You...
223
00:11:03,174 --> 00:11:05,090
Hi.
224
00:11:05,096 --> 00:11:06,957
Welcome to Pickle Barrow Fa...
225
00:11:06,958 --> 00:11:08,699
Oh! Oh!
226
00:11:08,700 --> 00:11:09,780
Ooh...
227
00:11:09,782 --> 00:11:11,500
How'd I get here?
228
00:11:11,505 --> 00:11:12,980
Did we die?
229
00:11:12,987 --> 00:11:16,349
Oh, my God, is death
people flying in barrels
230
00:11:16,350 --> 00:11:17,869
and rockets made from twigs?
231
00:11:17,870 --> 00:11:19,802
You mean Astronotter's rocket?
232
00:11:19,803 --> 00:11:20,931
What's an Astronotter?
233
00:11:20,932 --> 00:11:23,640
She's an otter who's always
reaching for the stars.
234
00:11:23,650 --> 00:11:26,477
Have you never seen my show?
235
00:11:26,478 --> 00:11:28,059
We're on your show?
236
00:11:28,060 --> 00:11:29,699
No, not the show.
237
00:11:29,700 --> 00:11:31,490
It's the land the show takes place...
238
00:11:31,491 --> 00:11:33,569
Eeh! Ow!
239
00:11:33,570 --> 00:11:35,429
- You feel that?
- Yes, it hurt!
240
00:11:35,430 --> 00:11:38,364
Oh, my God,
this anesthesiologist is terrible.
241
00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:39,949
He's subbing in for you from County.
242
00:11:39,950 --> 00:11:41,620
Dr. Gimple? I mean, I'm surprised
243
00:11:41,630 --> 00:11:43,202
that we're not both awake right now.
244
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:44,659
Are you in any pain?
245
00:11:44,660 --> 00:11:46,399
You exploded my liver
246
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:49,041
with your PT Cruiser, motherfucker!
247
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:51,335
Please don't use a bad word when...
248
00:11:51,336 --> 00:11:53,128
- Aah!
- Get him, Uncle Peter!
249
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:56,419
I... don't... want... to... fight you!
250
00:11:56,420 --> 00:11:58,909
Hey, fuck him up!
251
00:11:58,910 --> 00:12:00,209
Fuck you, bread bitch.
252
00:12:00,210 --> 00:12:01,221
Uhh!
253
00:12:01,222 --> 00:12:04,239
The surgery is almost complete.
254
00:12:04,240 --> 00:12:07,169
Peter's body is accepting Jeff's liver.
255
00:12:07,170 --> 00:12:09,359
We've run into some
complications with Jeff,
256
00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:12,259
but we think he'll be
out of the woods soon.
257
00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:16,026
I will let them know.
258
00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:19,839
Wha... Aah!
259
00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:23,100
I wanna hit ya. Something's wrong.
260
00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:26,490
Your body is accepting my liver.
261
00:12:28,244 --> 00:12:30,720
My hands... I got...
262
00:12:30,727 --> 00:12:32,360
I can't... make
263
00:12:32,369 --> 00:12:35,379
♪ Fists ♪
264
00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:39,508
♪ Why am I singing
when I want to punch you? ♪
265
00:12:39,509 --> 00:12:41,386
Because I'm becoming a part of you.
266
00:12:41,387 --> 00:12:45,139
♪ Maybe I don't want you
to be a part of me ♪
267
00:12:45,140 --> 00:12:48,719
♪ I want to be angry Peter ♪
268
00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:50,379
I think when you're mad, it's important
269
00:12:50,380 --> 00:12:52,559
to put that mad into
something productive,
270
00:12:52,560 --> 00:12:54,789
like learning a new dance step.
271
00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:59,340
Choreography's much more
interesting than violence
272
00:12:59,350 --> 00:13:02,160
- and twice as aerobic.
- ♪ See this is your problem ♪
273
00:13:02,170 --> 00:13:04,060
♪ You need to let your
feelings to the surface ♪
274
00:13:04,070 --> 00:13:06,089
♪ You can't bottle them up
into advanced choreography ♪
275
00:13:06,090 --> 00:13:07,620
♪ Or bad things happen like you ♪
276
00:13:07,630 --> 00:13:11,379
♪ Hit people with cars ♪
277
00:13:11,380 --> 00:13:12,664
Stop it!
278
00:13:12,665 --> 00:13:14,539
- Puppet music guy!
- Ow!
279
00:13:14,540 --> 00:13:17,559
No, Peter, you have to
accept me, or you'll die.
280
00:13:17,560 --> 00:13:20,679
No, Jeff, you need to
let it out, or you'll kill.
281
00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:22,199
♪ Don't squelch it, don't squash it ♪
282
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:23,469
♪ Contain or kibosh it ♪
283
00:13:23,470 --> 00:13:25,950
♪ Express it, exhale, and expel it ♪
284
00:13:25,959 --> 00:13:27,519
♪ It's healing, it's cleansing ♪
285
00:13:27,520 --> 00:13:28,899
♪ So breathe deep and then sing ♪
286
00:13:28,900 --> 00:13:30,899
♪ Or clamor or hammer or yell it ♪
287
00:13:30,900 --> 00:13:33,219
Holy shit, I'm so good at rhyming now.
288
00:13:33,220 --> 00:13:34,644
♪ You owe it to yourself ♪
289
00:13:34,645 --> 00:13:36,060
♪ Your pissed, pent-up poor self ♪
290
00:13:36,070 --> 00:13:38,401
♪ To loosen your gasket and spout ♪
291
00:13:38,402 --> 00:13:41,299
♪ Go crazy, go ape shit,
unlock and untape shit ♪
292
00:13:41,300 --> 00:13:43,819
♪ And finally, for once, let it out! ♪
293
00:13:43,820 --> 00:13:48,279
Jesus, is your vocabulary
stored in your liver?
294
00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:50,954
Calm down, you furious flesh bags!
295
00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:53,457
Your anger is bubbling my bog!
296
00:13:53,458 --> 00:13:56,210
Ah, quiet, you linty piece of shit!
297
00:13:56,211 --> 00:13:58,159
Wait, wait, wait.
298
00:13:59,710 --> 00:14:00,879
The bog fuels the rocket!
299
00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:03,550
Yeah, no shit, fucktard!
300
00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:06,345
Dig deep. What's wounding you, friend?
301
00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:08,055
Spit it out, dipshit!
302
00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:10,609
♪ Okay well, statistically ♪
303
00:14:10,610 --> 00:14:11,949
♪ People sadistically ♪
304
00:14:11,950 --> 00:14:14,359
♪ Point and they laugh at my hair ♪
305
00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:17,379
♪ It's a choice of a 'do, but
that's for me, not you ♪
306
00:14:17,380 --> 00:14:19,379
♪ And why can't a grown man just share ♪
307
00:14:19,380 --> 00:14:21,439
♪ His feelings without being
labeled a homosexual? ♪
308
00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:24,160
♪ Jill loved my capacity
for gentle sagacity ♪
309
00:14:24,170 --> 00:14:26,919
♪ Jill ran her Jill hands
through that hair ♪
310
00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:29,699
♪ Then you stole my bride,
almost broke me inside ♪
311
00:14:29,700 --> 00:14:33,200
♪ But I can't let you die
because I can't not care! ♪
312
00:14:33,205 --> 00:14:35,166
Wow. That felt wonderful.
313
00:14:38,210 --> 00:14:40,979
♪ I trusted you, Peter,
to not just act sweeter ♪
314
00:14:40,980 --> 00:14:43,540
♪ But smarter and better with Will ♪
315
00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:46,399
♪ To set good examples,
not offer me samples ♪
316
00:14:46,400 --> 00:14:48,638
♪ Of ganja... drugs
hurt and drugs kill ♪
317
00:14:49,900 --> 00:14:51,879
♪ Will's learning, still growing ♪
318
00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:53,179
♪ And studies are showing ♪
319
00:14:53,180 --> 00:14:55,920
♪ Pot oopses a teenager's brain ♪
320
00:14:55,940 --> 00:14:58,540
♪ Yet I'm full of animus
and so pusillanimous ♪
321
00:14:58,550 --> 00:15:01,119
♪ For driving you out of my lane ♪
322
00:15:01,120 --> 00:15:02,899
Look, man, it's working.
323
00:15:02,900 --> 00:15:04,525
Keep going. We're gonna get outta here.
324
00:15:04,526 --> 00:15:05,940
♪ Dum di-di-dum, dum di-di-dum ♪
325
00:15:05,980 --> 00:15:07,365
♪ Dum di-di-dum, dum di-di-dum ♪
326
00:15:07,380 --> 00:15:08,820
♪ Dum di-di-dum, dum di-di-dum ♪
327
00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:10,280
♪ Dum di-di-dum... ♪
328
00:15:10,290 --> 00:15:13,449
♪ Dum di-di... ♪
329
00:15:13,450 --> 00:15:15,179
- ♪ I'm angry at Vivian ♪
- ♪ Let it out ♪
330
00:15:15,180 --> 00:15:16,679
- ♪ For ruining Thanksgiving ♪
- ♪ Get it out ♪
331
00:15:16,680 --> 00:15:18,419
♪ I saved her, and how'd she repay me? ♪
332
00:15:18,420 --> 00:15:20,639
- ♪ It'll make the world safer ♪
- ♪ Are all people greedy? ♪
333
00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:22,279
- ♪ Self-centered, mislead-y ♪
- ♪ We feel ♪
334
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,439
♪ I act like I'm better, well, yay, me ♪
335
00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:25,499
♪ With you behind the wheel ♪
336
00:15:25,500 --> 00:15:26,719
♪ I hate my creator ♪
337
00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:28,160
♪ That villain, that traitor ♪
338
00:15:28,170 --> 00:15:30,599
♪ His negligence makes me the angriest ♪
339
00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:33,179
♪ Would it help if I
gave up a pancreas? ♪
340
00:15:33,180 --> 00:15:37,769
♪ God, I'm ♪
341
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:39,129
♪ Good but I'm limited,
that's a dichotomy ♪
342
00:15:39,130 --> 00:15:40,559
♪ Gave a Lipinski a bad tracheotomy ♪
343
00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:41,879
♪ Angry at God and I'm angry at Jill ♪
344
00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:44,319
♪ She was driving the car ♪
♪ It's her fault we lost Phil ♪
345
00:15:54,260 --> 00:15:57,439
♪ I'm angry at me ♪
346
00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:01,679
♪ For thinking that ♪
347
00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:04,879
♪ I hate that I can't forgive her ♪
348
00:16:06,030 --> 00:16:07,440
Look, man.
349
00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:10,220
You did it.
350
00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:13,019
With teamwork.
351
00:16:13,020 --> 00:16:16,760
♪ Now, adiós, Pickles ♪
352
00:16:16,770 --> 00:16:20,099
♪ I'm going to fuck your wife ♪
353
00:16:20,100 --> 00:16:21,760
♪ With your ♪
354
00:16:21,770 --> 00:16:24,599
♪ Liver! ♪
355
00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:28,320
♪ Aaaaaah! ♪
356
00:16:32,408 --> 00:16:33,960
Oh!
357
00:16:50,340 --> 00:16:52,139
Do you think we could
ask you a few questions
358
00:16:52,140 --> 00:16:53,519
about what happened the other night?
359
00:16:53,520 --> 00:16:54,846
I'm happy to help.
360
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:56,974
What time did the incident take place?
361
00:16:56,975 --> 00:16:59,601
About 9:30 p.m.
362
00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:01,478
Make and model of the car?
363
00:17:01,479 --> 00:17:02,980
A 2006
364
00:17:02,981 --> 00:17:05,349
PT Cruiser with wood panels.
365
00:17:05,350 --> 00:17:06,799
Like a pickle barrel.
366
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:08,519
Yeah.
367
00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:11,446
Sorry, I just put that together.
368
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,824
And the PT stands for Puppet Time.
369
00:17:13,825 --> 00:17:15,449
Holy shit.
370
00:17:15,450 --> 00:17:18,179
Yeah, when the model came
out, he had to have one.
371
00:17:18,180 --> 00:17:21,164
And what was Dr. Zeckhauser
doing in the street?
372
00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:25,961
I don't know.
373
00:17:25,962 --> 00:17:28,580
Just a few more questions.
374
00:17:30,260 --> 00:17:31,940
Actually, no.
375
00:17:31,950 --> 00:17:33,199
Thanks for your time.
376
00:17:33,200 --> 00:17:35,263
Uh, unless there's anything
you'd like to add.
377
00:17:37,340 --> 00:17:39,579
No, I guess not.
378
00:17:39,580 --> 00:17:42,729
It's a fantastic thing
your husband's doing.
379
00:17:42,730 --> 00:17:44,021
Just fantastic.
380
00:17:53,110 --> 00:17:55,560
- Thank you for that.
- I feel sorry for him.
381
00:17:55,570 --> 00:17:56,819
It was only a matter of time
382
00:17:56,820 --> 00:17:58,327
before something like this happened.
383
00:17:58,328 --> 00:18:00,454
No one could see this coming.
384
00:18:00,455 --> 00:18:03,498
I could have circled it on
my motherfucking calendar.
385
00:18:03,499 --> 00:18:05,539
He feels awful about what he did.
386
00:18:05,540 --> 00:18:06,940
He's gonna spend the rest of his life
387
00:18:06,950 --> 00:18:08,289
making it up to you.
388
00:18:08,290 --> 00:18:09,499
My condolences.
389
00:18:09,500 --> 00:18:11,739
I only met Peter a few times,
390
00:18:11,740 --> 00:18:15,802
but I found him to be a
gentle, caring soul.
391
00:18:15,803 --> 00:18:17,259
He isn't dead.
392
00:18:17,260 --> 00:18:18,460
I'm sorry.
393
00:18:18,470 --> 00:18:20,640
I misread the room.
394
00:18:20,650 --> 00:18:23,509
How's the surgery going? Good, I hope?
395
00:18:23,510 --> 00:18:24,879
We should talk about
396
00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:27,699
putting together a family
meal or something.
397
00:18:27,700 --> 00:18:29,799
Not anytime soon, just down the road
398
00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:31,819
when they're eating solid food again.
399
00:18:31,820 --> 00:18:33,820
Please keep Jeff away
from me and my son.
400
00:18:33,821 --> 00:18:36,197
- You don't mean that.
- You could have put him in therapy,
401
00:18:36,198 --> 00:18:37,940
grief counseling. You could
have taken him off the air.
402
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:40,327
You could have loosened his tie!
403
00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:42,949
Would anyone like a chocolate bar?
404
00:18:42,950 --> 00:18:44,379
Maybe it was hard on him
405
00:18:44,380 --> 00:18:45,749
seeing you with someone
406
00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:47,749
so soon after Phil's accident.
407
00:18:47,750 --> 00:18:50,040
- What did you say?
- Plus, not doing drugs
408
00:18:50,050 --> 00:18:52,359
is a core value for him.
409
00:18:52,360 --> 00:18:55,179
You can see how Peter smoking dope
410
00:18:55,180 --> 00:18:58,100
might have triggered
all of this, just...
411
00:18:58,107 --> 00:18:59,471
pot is illegal.
412
00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:01,098
I've seen you high!
413
00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:03,230
- What?
- Yeah, let's dump out your purse
414
00:19:03,234 --> 00:19:05,060
and see if you're worth
hitting like a deer!
415
00:19:05,061 --> 00:19:07,313
Don't blame her, and
don't blame the show.
416
00:19:07,314 --> 00:19:09,259
I blame you, Seb.
417
00:19:09,260 --> 00:19:12,399
You could have helped
him anytime... anytime!
418
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:14,819
Instead, you built this trap for him.
419
00:19:14,820 --> 00:19:17,479
The show is a trap, it's an endless loop
420
00:19:17,480 --> 00:19:19,574
denying him his humanity.
421
00:19:19,575 --> 00:19:22,699
Up the falls, down the falls,
up the falls, down the falls,
422
00:19:22,700 --> 00:19:24,819
up, down, up, down, up!
423
00:19:24,820 --> 00:19:26,666
You are a terrible father.
424
00:19:27,620 --> 00:19:30,140
Jeff was a special boy
425
00:19:30,149 --> 00:19:33,547
with a heart... like Secretariat
426
00:19:33,548 --> 00:19:36,539
and an imagination I have protected
427
00:19:36,540 --> 00:19:39,359
through tragedy after tragedy.
428
00:19:39,360 --> 00:19:41,719
Everything I have done for Jeff
429
00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:43,224
you would have done for Will.
430
00:19:43,225 --> 00:19:44,699
Like cheat on his mom?
431
00:19:44,700 --> 00:19:48,100
There were times when you
could have tried harder.
432
00:19:48,110 --> 00:19:49,719
And you...
433
00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:50,999
always did favor him.
434
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,739
- A little.
- He needed it.
435
00:19:52,740 --> 00:19:54,299
You're fine.
436
00:19:54,300 --> 00:19:57,139
You have a beautiful family.
437
00:19:57,140 --> 00:19:59,260
I'm getting divorced.
438
00:19:59,270 --> 00:20:01,366
What? Why?
439
00:20:01,367 --> 00:20:04,430
Scott's gay and...
440
00:20:04,433 --> 00:20:06,329
I slept with Mr. Pickles-San.
441
00:20:07,990 --> 00:20:09,909
He took a vow of chastity!
442
00:20:09,910 --> 00:20:12,753
I'm sorry you're getting
divorced, Deirdre.
443
00:20:12,754 --> 00:20:15,480
Oh, I suppose that's my fault too?
444
00:20:15,487 --> 00:20:17,249
I'm fine, Dad.
445
00:20:17,250 --> 00:20:18,359
Thanks for your concern.
446
00:20:18,360 --> 00:20:20,370
Look, I don't have to defend myself.
447
00:20:20,380 --> 00:20:23,709
I was a good mom. I was a good dad.
448
00:20:23,710 --> 00:20:27,250
And I stayed, God damn it, I stayed!
449
00:20:30,396 --> 00:20:33,580
When Jeff wakes up, tell him...
450
00:20:36,835 --> 00:20:38,479
Actually, I don't care.
451
00:20:41,300 --> 00:20:43,339
Why's Grandpa crying?
452
00:20:43,340 --> 00:20:45,453
- Where have you been?
- Here's your money back.
453
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:49,370
Where did all this come from?
454
00:20:49,373 --> 00:20:50,791
Bodies.
455
00:20:50,792 --> 00:20:52,501
Is that pasta?
456
00:20:52,502 --> 00:20:54,961
No, it's water, and over here
457
00:20:54,962 --> 00:20:57,923
is the canyon where it
rains nothing but confetti
458
00:20:57,924 --> 00:21:00,051
because it is such a happy place.
459
00:21:00,052 --> 00:21:03,119
And this is a tower made
from the best desserts,
460
00:21:03,120 --> 00:21:05,680
so you can eat as you climb
up if you need a snack.
461
00:21:05,681 --> 00:21:08,179
Isn't it a wonderful place?
462
00:21:08,180 --> 00:21:10,879
This is why I stayed.
463
00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:13,599
But maybe one day you can meet me here
464
00:21:13,600 --> 00:21:15,233
and see it for yourselves.
465
00:21:15,234 --> 00:21:16,760
I do miss my children.
466
00:21:16,770 --> 00:21:20,862
You just have to figure out
how to get down the waterfall.
467
00:21:20,863 --> 00:21:23,490
That's the only part I can't figure out.
468
00:21:23,491 --> 00:21:26,368
How do I get down?
469
00:21:30,581 --> 00:21:33,959
Oops. I guess we're stuck down here.
470
00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:36,339
Maybe down is where we belong.
471
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:40,219
Hey, little guy.
472
00:21:40,220 --> 00:21:42,679
You look like you could use a hand.
473
00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:44,259
How do I get up, Hopscotch?
474
00:21:44,260 --> 00:21:48,429
Silly Jeff, you know how you
get back up to the waterfall.
475
00:21:48,430 --> 00:21:50,079
- I do?
- Of course.
476
00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:53,599
I put you in my hand and bring
you back up to the top.
477
00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:56,857
It's been that way since the
first time you came down here.
478
00:21:56,858 --> 00:22:00,250
Go on, grab a seat.
479
00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:09,450
Thanks for the lift, big guy.
480
00:22:19,950 --> 00:22:22,720
I don't think I could have
done it without you.
481
00:22:23,820 --> 00:22:27,699
Well, I feel the same
way about you, Jeff.
482
00:22:27,700 --> 00:22:30,650
Do you remember when we first met?
483
00:22:32,700 --> 00:22:37,219
♪ I was a sad and lonely sasquatch ♪
484
00:22:37,220 --> 00:22:41,339
♪ I had no home, nowhere to be ♪
485
00:22:41,340 --> 00:22:45,840
♪ You took me in, and
then you changed that ♪
486
00:22:45,850 --> 00:22:50,040
♪ You built a place for me ♪
487
00:22:50,050 --> 00:22:54,399
♪ You hung the sky that
I could stand in ♪
488
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:58,560
♪ You dreamed the canyon tree by tree ♪
489
00:22:58,570 --> 00:23:03,279
♪ You built a place
that makes me happy ♪
490
00:23:03,280 --> 00:23:07,439
♪ You built the place for me ♪
491
00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:11,219
♪ I was tall as grownups are ♪
492
00:23:11,220 --> 00:23:15,899
♪ And scared of getting taller ♪
493
00:23:15,900 --> 00:23:20,039
♪ You showed me fears all are ♪
494
00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:22,919
♪ Pretend ♪
495
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:24,959
♪ Thank you, Jeff ♪
496
00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:28,949
♪ Thank you, friend ♪
497
00:23:28,950 --> 00:23:33,219
♪ Home is a place where people matter ♪
498
00:23:33,220 --> 00:23:37,549
♪ Home is a place for family ♪
499
00:23:37,550 --> 00:23:39,209
♪ You built my home ♪
500
00:23:39,210 --> 00:23:42,359
♪ And that's what matters ♪
501
00:23:42,360 --> 00:23:46,800
♪ You built a place for me ♪
502
00:24:07,080 --> 00:24:09,799
I can get you down the waterfall.
503
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:11,319
How?
504
00:24:11,320 --> 00:24:13,320
In this pickle barrel, of course.
505
00:24:13,330 --> 00:24:16,219
Now, falls can be risky.
506
00:24:16,220 --> 00:24:19,399
Here... be careful.
507
00:24:21,750 --> 00:24:26,299
♪ You built a place for me ♪
508
00:24:26,300 --> 00:24:31,570
♪ Where I was happy ♪
509
00:24:36,934 --> 00:24:44,020
♪ Ah ah ah ah ♪
510
00:24:46,027 --> 00:24:48,278
♪ Up goes the barrel ♪
511
00:24:48,279 --> 00:24:51,189
♪ Jeff feels anxious ♪
512
00:24:51,190 --> 00:24:53,919
♪ Down goes the barrel ♪
513
00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:57,279
♪ Jeff feels free ♪
514
00:24:57,280 --> 00:24:59,399
♪ Jeff has a feeling ♪
515
00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:03,040
♪ Dad says hide it ♪
516
00:25:03,050 --> 00:25:07,039
♪ He built a cage, I see ♪
517
00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:09,719
♪ Somehow I've got to ♪
518
00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:12,089
♪ Break the cycle ♪
519
00:25:12,090 --> 00:25:17,139
♪ I know the lock, I'll forge the key ♪
520
00:25:17,140 --> 00:25:22,520
♪ I will be more than two dimensions ♪
521
00:25:22,521 --> 00:25:24,990
♪ I'll get there ♪
522
00:25:26,940 --> 00:25:29,759
♪ Wait ♪
523
00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:36,340
♪ For me ♪
524
00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:08,939
Welcome back, my boy.
525
00:26:08,940 --> 00:26:10,820
You're gonna be just fine.
526
00:26:11,720 --> 00:26:15,060
They told me to feed you
ice chips for three days,
527
00:26:15,070 --> 00:26:18,309
but we both know I'm not doin' that.
528
00:26:20,020 --> 00:26:22,619
- Remember these?
- Ha.
529
00:26:22,620 --> 00:26:25,210
Turns out, they're not
so easy to find anymore.
530
00:26:26,450 --> 00:26:28,160
Dad.
531
00:26:28,170 --> 00:26:29,379
I'm here.
532
00:26:29,380 --> 00:26:32,000
What do you need?
533
00:26:32,780 --> 00:26:35,759
You're fired.
534
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:38,769
Subtitles by explosiveskull
Corrected by MementMori
37414
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