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Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
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The only reason
I'm here is because I
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00:03:20,218 --> 00:03:22,485
have contractual obligations.
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00:03:23,654 --> 00:03:25,488
You called me, Joseph.
5
00:03:25,823 --> 00:03:28,558
You picked
up the phone and you said,
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00:03:28,693 --> 00:03:31,028
"Save me. This time I mean it."
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00:03:31,896 --> 00:03:33,463
And what did I say to you.
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00:03:33,597 --> 00:03:35,266
"I dare you."
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00:03:36,033 --> 00:03:40,238
So what stopped you?
10
00:03:41,172 --> 00:03:43,573
Well, the
drinking's going well, I see.
11
00:03:43,708 --> 00:03:44,608
I'm cutting back.
12
00:03:44,742 --> 00:03:48,012
Yeah, so am I. Uh, boy!
13
00:03:53,651 --> 00:03:56,553
You have a contract
that pays actual money.
14
00:03:56,954 --> 00:04:00,091
You are going
to God knows where.
15
00:04:00,224 --> 00:04:01,524
Michigan.
16
00:04:01,659 --> 00:04:03,261
Wherever that is.
17
00:04:03,393 --> 00:04:05,730
You will be
adored, you'll be feted.
18
00:04:05,863 --> 00:04:09,466
Who knows, you may even
fall in love with some farm
19
00:04:09,599 --> 00:04:10,768
boy and spend the rest of your
20
00:04:10,902 --> 00:04:12,435
life writing
children's books, hmm?
21
00:04:12,569 --> 00:04:13,536
I hate children.
22
00:04:13,671 --> 00:04:15,239
Well, it's not a prerequisite.
23
00:04:18,276 --> 00:04:19,911
By the way, have you seen what's
24
00:04:20,044 --> 00:04:21,846
passing for
television these days?
25
00:04:21,979 --> 00:04:23,347
I don't believe in television.
26
00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:25,182
Who said you
have to believe in it?
27
00:04:25,816 --> 00:04:28,418
You don't want
to do TV, fix screenplays.
28
00:04:28,551 --> 00:04:29,452
No.
29
00:04:29,586 --> 00:04:30,453
Uncredited.
30
00:04:30,587 --> 00:04:31,923
Movies are bupkis.
31
00:04:33,824 --> 00:04:34,659
I don't even
know what that means.
32
00:04:35,625 --> 00:04:37,862
I'm a playwright,
Helen. I'm a playwright.
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00:04:40,831 --> 00:04:42,066
You're a dinosaur.
34
00:04:42,199 --> 00:04:44,902
And looked
what happened to them.
35
00:04:46,137 --> 00:04:47,805
Little faster next time.
36
00:04:49,340 --> 00:04:51,375
I'm afraid to ask, was there a
37
00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:54,779
particular reason why
you didn't send me your play?
38
00:04:55,478 --> 00:04:57,281
It's not readable.
39
00:04:59,283 --> 00:05:00,418
Joseph.
40
00:05:00,550 --> 00:05:01,518
It's not.
41
00:05:02,053 --> 00:05:05,522
Please,
and tell me there's a play,
42
00:05:05,656 --> 00:05:07,425
because I've
already spent the commission.
43
00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:08,826
There's a play.
44
00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:11,429
Because the
last time you told me what you
45
00:05:11,561 --> 00:05:12,462
had wasn't readable-
46
00:05:12,595 --> 00:05:13,965
There's a play.
47
00:05:19,270 --> 00:05:23,808
You know, someday, I'm
gonna look down at my phone and
48
00:05:23,941 --> 00:05:27,712
it's going to say,
"Joseph Harris is dead."
49
00:05:30,881 --> 00:05:35,753
And I'm gonna cry,
probably a lot. Not for what
50
00:05:35,886 --> 00:05:39,790
you were, for
what you could have been.
51
00:05:42,393 --> 00:05:45,863
I have a deathly fear of flying.
52
00:07:32,103 --> 00:07:34,071
Ah.
53
00:07:49,086 --> 00:07:51,088
Come on, let's go.
54
00:08:03,467 --> 00:08:05,336
Ah!
55
00:08:24,488 --> 00:08:25,556
Uh hi, hello.
56
00:08:26,824 --> 00:08:27,925
Uh, I'm Kenneth Waters, I'm the
guy who's supposed to be here to
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00:08:28,592 --> 00:08:29,026
pick you up 45 minutes ago.
58
00:08:30,327 --> 00:08:31,896
Uh sir, if I may, it's because
of you that I've decided to live
59
00:08:32,997 --> 00:08:34,732
my... uh, commit to...
commit my life to the theatre.
60
00:08:37,268 --> 00:08:38,869
Oh, sorry!
61
00:08:42,306 --> 00:08:43,741
Oh God!
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00:08:43,874 --> 00:08:45,176
I wrote a couple of short plays
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00:08:46,310 --> 00:08:47,178
before, but they're only
like 10 or 15 minutes long.
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00:08:48,245 --> 00:08:50,047
I got 1st place in like
my high school's play jam.
65
00:08:50,181 --> 00:08:52,750
Uh, there were only
two entries, but I still won.
66
00:08:52,883 --> 00:08:54,385
Don't talk.
Don't talk, don't talk.
67
00:08:54,518 --> 00:08:56,520
Oh no, if you open your mouth,
you'll be stupid, just shut up.
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00:08:56,655 --> 00:08:58,389
Just let him talk,
let him... just I'll take him...
69
00:08:58,522 --> 00:09:00,157
take him to
the hotel and it'll be fine.
70
00:09:02,193 --> 00:09:03,194
You'll ride in the
car with Joseph Harris.
71
00:09:18,475 --> 00:09:21,946
Oh! Oh there!
There's the station.
72
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:27,985
And here we go.
73
00:09:28,118 --> 00:09:31,355
Here we go! Here we go!
74
00:09:37,061 --> 00:09:38,596
What happened to the 565?
75
00:09:38,729 --> 00:09:40,197
Lower your voice.
76
00:09:40,764 --> 00:09:42,333
What happened to the 565?
77
00:09:42,466 --> 00:09:43,367
Lower.
78
00:09:55,646 --> 00:09:56,647
What happened to the 565?
79
00:09:56,780 --> 00:09:57,648
Come and gone.
80
00:09:57,781 --> 00:09:59,149
No.
Yes.
81
00:09:59,450 --> 00:10:00,484
Was it on time?
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00:10:00,618 --> 00:10:01,418
1:30.
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00:10:01,552 --> 00:10:02,553
Huh, I'm a dead man.
84
00:10:02,687 --> 00:10:03,854
Nice knowin' ya.
85
00:10:03,988 --> 00:10:05,789
Uh, did
anyone get off? An older man?
86
00:10:05,923 --> 00:10:07,057
Very distinguished looking?
87
00:10:07,191 --> 00:10:08,359
Wait, wait,
wait, I have a picture.
88
00:10:08,492 --> 00:10:10,060
First drop off
we've had in months.
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00:10:10,194 --> 00:10:11,629
The 565 never stops,
90
00:10:11,762 --> 00:10:13,364
nor does the 283 or the 112.
91
00:10:13,497 --> 00:10:17,801
The only train that stops is
the 419, every mornin' at 5:45.
92
00:10:17,935 --> 00:10:19,303
Here.
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00:10:19,436 --> 00:10:20,204
That's him.
94
00:10:20,337 --> 00:10:21,505
Did he say where he was going?
95
00:10:21,639 --> 00:10:22,539
To sleep.
96
00:10:22,674 --> 00:10:23,841
Where? The hotel?
97
00:10:56,340 --> 00:10:58,208
Hi, my name is Kenneth Waters.
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00:10:58,342 --> 00:10:59,910
I'm with the
Lima Theater Company.
99
00:11:00,044 --> 00:11:01,445
I'm here to
take you to your hotel.
100
00:11:02,046 --> 00:11:03,580
It's very nice.
101
00:11:03,715 --> 00:11:05,849
It's right downtown, within
walking distance of the theatre.
102
00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:09,953
This feels like one of those
103
00:11:10,087 --> 00:11:12,523
places you
go only if you have to.
104
00:11:15,426 --> 00:11:17,528
Does it feel
that way to you, Walter?
105
00:11:17,662 --> 00:11:22,032
Uh, Kenneth. No, not
at all. In fact, I grew up here.
106
00:11:22,767 --> 00:11:24,468
Escape.
107
00:11:25,002 --> 00:11:26,771
As soon
as we get you to your hotel,
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00:11:26,904 --> 00:11:28,272
I'll make
a run for it, I promise.
109
00:11:28,405 --> 00:11:31,408
Where's the person who
was supposed to pick me up?
110
00:11:31,542 --> 00:11:32,609
He was here.
111
00:11:32,744 --> 00:11:34,178
Uh well, I just said "he".
112
00:11:34,311 --> 00:11:36,246
I... I... I... I... I meant "me".
113
00:11:36,815 --> 00:11:38,215
You were here.
114
00:11:38,683 --> 00:11:40,685
Actually, technically...
115
00:11:40,819 --> 00:11:44,621
Actually, technically, oh okay...
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00:11:44,756 --> 00:11:49,828
you weren't, because when I got
off the train, I stood on the
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00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:54,465
platform with my suitcase,
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00:11:54,598 --> 00:11:56,668
waiting for someone to...
119
00:11:56,801 --> 00:12:01,538
waiting for someone to pick me
up, at the very least pick up my
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00:12:01,673 --> 00:12:03,607
s... s-suitcase.
121
00:12:03,742 --> 00:12:08,512
And after waiting
for what seemed like a very long
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00:12:08,645 --> 00:12:13,350
time, no one actually
technically came, at which point
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00:12:13,484 --> 00:12:18,355
I actually technically
made my way in here,
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00:12:18,489 --> 00:12:19,356
dragging my now
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00:12:19,490 --> 00:12:22,926
very heavy suitcase, sat down,
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00:12:23,060 --> 00:12:27,231
collapsing in this very spot and
127
00:12:27,364 --> 00:12:32,069
yet still, no one, no one
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00:12:32,202 --> 00:12:35,539
from the Lima Bean Repertory...
129
00:12:35,673 --> 00:12:36,607
Just Lima.
130
00:12:37,776 --> 00:12:41,078
...Company came forward to
collect me or my suitcase at
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00:12:41,211 --> 00:12:46,250
which point I fell asleep on
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00:12:46,950 --> 00:12:49,553
this sad excuse for a seating
133
00:12:49,687 --> 00:12:53,624
device, thoroughly
wrenching my back.
134
00:12:53,758 --> 00:12:54,692
Here, let me get that for you.
135
00:12:54,826 --> 00:12:56,026
No!
136
00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:57,027
I'm sorry, I was just...
137
00:12:57,161 --> 00:13:00,164
Don't apologize!
138
00:13:18,348 --> 00:13:20,284
Oh.
139
00:13:51,850 --> 00:13:54,551
You know any good jokes?
140
00:13:54,686 --> 00:13:56,153
Jokes?
141
00:13:56,286 --> 00:13:57,755
I need a laugh.
142
00:13:57,889 --> 00:13:59,389
You're not serious.
143
00:13:59,523 --> 00:14:01,358
I'm a playwright,
I'm eternally serious.
144
00:14:01,492 --> 00:14:04,261
I'm also important.
Which is even worse.
145
00:14:04,929 --> 00:14:06,196
Uh no, no, I don't.
146
00:14:06,330 --> 00:14:07,397
Besides even
if I did, I'm afraid I'm not
147
00:14:07,531 --> 00:14:08,999
very good at telling them.
148
00:14:09,132 --> 00:14:10,969
Hardly something to
fear, go ask the masses.
149
00:14:11,101 --> 00:14:12,169
The who?
150
00:14:13,437 --> 00:14:15,038
The ones who don't go to the
theatre anymore, because they're
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00:14:15,172 --> 00:14:17,976
too busy binge
watching the Kardashians.
152
00:14:18,710 --> 00:14:21,713
O'Neill was so lucky
to have written when he did.
153
00:14:22,479 --> 00:14:24,381
Look at him in there, huh.
154
00:14:24,916 --> 00:14:27,752
Trapped inside his little box.
155
00:14:27,886 --> 00:14:29,721
Of your own making, I might add!
156
00:14:29,854 --> 00:14:31,890
Yeah, it's okay.
It's okay, we're leaving.
157
00:14:32,022 --> 00:14:33,658
Well, not until I hear a joke!
158
00:14:35,092 --> 00:14:36,694
I'm a... I'm a very good laugher.
159
00:14:36,828 --> 00:14:40,063
Producers count me
into their Opening Nights and
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00:14:40,197 --> 00:14:42,032
seat me
right behind the critics.
161
00:14:42,165 --> 00:14:46,303
It never helps, but long as
there's food, what do I care?
162
00:14:46,436 --> 00:14:48,873
Well, you know who
knows a lot of jokes?
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00:14:49,007 --> 00:14:49,874
Hmm?
164
00:14:50,008 --> 00:14:50,975
Simon.
165
00:14:51,108 --> 00:14:52,476
Neil?
166
00:14:52,609 --> 00:14:53,711
John.
167
00:14:53,845 --> 00:14:56,380
Simon John. Artistic
Director of the Lima...
168
00:14:56,513 --> 00:14:57,749
Oh, oh, oh, yes, yes!
169
00:14:57,882 --> 00:15:00,652
Yes! Mr. John
and I spoke over the phone.
170
00:15:00,785 --> 00:15:03,186
I'm not sure you're
aware, but the man was born
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00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:04,956
without a sense
of humor which I didn't...
172
00:15:05,088 --> 00:15:09,359
I didn't think was
genetically possible until he
173
00:15:09,493 --> 00:15:11,829
spent an hour and a
half telling me about himself.
174
00:15:11,963 --> 00:15:13,297
He can be very funny.
175
00:15:13,430 --> 00:15:16,668
He's a bore. Why
did the chicken cross the road?
176
00:15:16,801 --> 00:15:18,068
What?
177
00:15:18,201 --> 00:15:20,772
No, why.
178
00:15:20,905 --> 00:15:23,507
I say, "Why
did the chicken cross the road?"
179
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:24,341
You say...
180
00:15:24,474 --> 00:15:25,409
To get to the other side.
181
00:15:25,542 --> 00:15:26,610
That's the punch line.
182
00:15:26,744 --> 00:15:27,644
I know.
183
00:15:28,579 --> 00:15:29,379
Well, you said
you didn't know any jokes.
184
00:15:30,014 --> 00:15:30,547
Everybody knows that one.
185
00:15:31,214 --> 00:15:32,649
Ah, ah, you prove my point!
186
00:15:33,450 --> 00:15:36,721
Granted, you cut
directly to the pay off, but
187
00:15:36,854 --> 00:15:39,323
then, that's what's wrong
with your generation, isn't it?
188
00:15:39,456 --> 00:15:41,325
It's all about the
now, the being there,
189
00:15:41,458 --> 00:15:42,526
not the getting there.
190
00:15:42,660 --> 00:15:44,628
You have
no use for the journey.
191
00:15:45,730 --> 00:15:47,065
I have a joke.
192
00:15:47,197 --> 00:15:48,298
Praise Jesus.
193
00:15:48,432 --> 00:15:50,068
It's a theatre joke.
194
00:15:51,002 --> 00:15:53,705
Are you implying
that the theatre is a joke?
195
00:15:53,838 --> 00:15:56,640
No, of course not. That's
the last thing I would do.
196
00:15:56,774 --> 00:15:59,610
Well, it is. Trust me,
I've spent my life in it.
197
00:16:00,310 --> 00:16:01,645
I don't
believe that for a second.
198
00:16:02,412 --> 00:16:05,349
Well, the sooner
you do, the easier it'll be to
199
00:16:05,482 --> 00:16:07,284
read your own reviews.
200
00:16:08,385 --> 00:16:09,553
Is it funny?
201
00:16:09,687 --> 00:16:11,288
This joke about the theatre?
202
00:16:12,589 --> 00:16:14,291
Because if it's not, I'm going
to personally see to it that you
203
00:16:14,424 --> 00:16:16,226
never work
in this business again.
204
00:16:19,429 --> 00:16:20,564
That was a joke.
205
00:16:20,698 --> 00:16:22,599
Oh!
206
00:16:26,470 --> 00:16:28,205
Tell me your joke.
207
00:16:28,338 --> 00:16:29,774
Right, okay.
208
00:16:31,042 --> 00:16:33,410
Yes. There was this actor, uh an
old character actor and he was
209
00:16:33,543 --> 00:16:35,479
playing the doctor
in The Miracle Worker.
210
00:16:35,612 --> 00:16:37,815
You know, the
famous play about Helen Keller?
211
00:16:37,949 --> 00:16:39,583
Define famous.
212
00:16:39,717 --> 00:16:41,184
What?
213
00:16:41,318 --> 00:16:43,655
What is fame?
214
00:16:44,621 --> 00:16:46,658
It's well known,
something well known.
215
00:16:47,324 --> 00:16:49,727
I did not know that.
216
00:16:50,460 --> 00:16:53,263
Anyway,
this actor was also a drunk and
217
00:16:53,397 --> 00:16:54,666
his career
had not been going well.
218
00:16:54,799 --> 00:16:56,500
And in the
first scene of the play,
219
00:16:56,633 --> 00:16:57,969
he's to come on stage and
inform Mr. and Mrs. Keller that
220
00:16:58,102 --> 00:16:59,771
their daughter is,
you know, the way she is.
221
00:16:59,904 --> 00:17:01,706
So before the
curtain goes up, this actor sits
222
00:17:01,839 --> 00:17:03,206
in front of his
dressing room mirror,
223
00:17:03,340 --> 00:17:05,175
drinking, staring at himself.
224
00:17:05,308 --> 00:17:06,711
The curtain goes up,
225
00:17:07,979 --> 00:17:09,413
this actor steps on stage and he
says, "Mr. and Mrs. Keller, I'm
226
00:17:09,546 --> 00:17:10,915
sorry to tell you, but
your daughter is dead."
227
00:17:11,049 --> 00:17:12,784
And he turns
and walks off, out of the
228
00:17:12,917 --> 00:17:15,185
theatre, never to
set foot on the stage again.
229
00:17:23,027 --> 00:17:25,930
Why?
230
00:17:28,733 --> 00:17:29,599
What?
231
00:17:29,734 --> 00:17:30,735
No.
232
00:17:30,868 --> 00:17:32,904
Why?
233
00:17:33,037 --> 00:17:34,471
That's the joke.
234
00:17:35,073 --> 00:17:36,674
What if I told you that the
235
00:17:36,808 --> 00:17:39,443
actor's name
was Kensington Malloy.
236
00:17:40,243 --> 00:17:45,116
And the theatre
was the Morosco in 1973.
237
00:17:45,817 --> 00:17:49,252
And that I not
only saw that production,
238
00:17:49,386 --> 00:17:53,725
I was in the audience the very
night that Mr. Malloy walked
239
00:17:53,858 --> 00:17:58,930
onto a Broadway stage and ended
both the play and his career?
240
00:17:59,063 --> 00:18:00,397
I'm sorry.
241
00:18:00,530 --> 00:18:03,901
Don't apologize!
An artist never apologizes!
242
00:18:04,035 --> 00:18:05,069
I'm sorry.
243
00:18:05,203 --> 00:18:06,104
Not sorry!
244
00:18:06,269 --> 00:18:07,304
Not sorry!
245
00:18:07,437 --> 00:18:08,605
Not sorry!
246
00:18:08,740 --> 00:18:09,674
Not sorry!
247
00:18:10,775 --> 00:18:13,745
For the record, that was
not a joke, but an anecdote.
248
00:18:13,878 --> 00:18:15,913
Hardly comedic.
249
00:18:16,047 --> 00:18:19,416
Tragic, to be
sure, in the classical sense.
250
00:18:19,549 --> 00:18:21,085
You're aware of the Greeks?
251
00:18:21,219 --> 00:18:22,285
Yes, of course.
252
00:18:22,419 --> 00:18:24,789
Name three.
253
00:18:26,256 --> 00:18:27,557
What?
254
00:18:27,692 --> 00:18:30,393
Name three Greek
playwrights whose influence on
255
00:18:30,527 --> 00:18:32,930
the world of
drama is still felt today.
256
00:18:33,064 --> 00:18:35,733
Euripides,
Sophocles, and Aristophanes.
257
00:18:35,867 --> 00:18:38,468
Who said, "Anything
awful makes me laugh"?
258
00:18:38,602 --> 00:18:40,138
Aristophanes?
259
00:18:40,270 --> 00:18:44,008
Charles Lamb. You
know who Charles Lamb is?
260
00:18:44,142 --> 00:18:45,243
Was he Greek?
261
00:18:45,375 --> 00:18:46,811
Oh God.
262
00:18:50,848 --> 00:18:54,484
An obscure English author who
263
00:18:54,618 --> 00:18:56,754
once misbehaved at a funeral,
264
00:18:56,888 --> 00:19:00,725
laughing during
the eulogy or something.
265
00:19:04,262 --> 00:19:06,731
He wrote a letter in the form of
266
00:19:06,864 --> 00:19:09,834
an apology to the appropriately
267
00:19:09,967 --> 00:19:13,671
appalled widow, stated
with great importance,
268
00:19:15,139 --> 00:19:17,708
"Anything awful makes me laugh."
269
00:19:24,381 --> 00:19:28,686
Actually technically, you
know what I would really like?
270
00:19:28,820 --> 00:19:30,387
Yeah, anything. You name it.
271
00:19:31,421 --> 00:19:33,858
Oh, you're over here now.
272
00:19:34,725 --> 00:19:36,227
A drink.
273
00:19:36,359 --> 00:19:41,032
No. I mean, I can't.
274
00:19:41,631 --> 00:19:44,467
Have I mentioned
I have won the Pulitzer?
275
00:19:44,601 --> 00:19:45,736
For Up a Lonely River.
276
00:19:45,870 --> 00:19:47,604
It's my favorite
play in the whole world.
277
00:19:47,738 --> 00:19:49,506
I cannot even begin to tell you
how much that play means to me.
278
00:19:49,639 --> 00:19:52,210
As much as a
drink would mean to me?
279
00:19:52,877 --> 00:19:55,012
Mr. Harris, Simon
made it very clear, under no
280
00:19:55,146 --> 00:19:57,581
circumstances was I
to get you liquor of any kind.
281
00:19:57,715 --> 00:20:00,051
My reputation
arrived before I did.
282
00:20:00,184 --> 00:20:00,818
Yeah, I'm sorry.
283
00:20:00,952 --> 00:20:01,819
Not.
284
00:20:01,953 --> 00:20:02,887
Not sorry.
285
00:20:03,020 --> 00:20:04,222
What's your name again?
286
00:20:04,354 --> 00:20:05,488
Kenneth Waters.
287
00:20:05,622 --> 00:20:07,892
Do you drink, Mr. Waters?
288
00:20:08,025 --> 00:20:09,093
No.
289
00:20:09,227 --> 00:20:10,560
Would you like to start?
290
00:20:10,695 --> 00:20:12,462
I'm sure
the hotel has a mini-bar.
291
00:20:13,097 --> 00:20:14,397
Yes, I'm sure it does.
292
00:20:14,966 --> 00:20:19,502
Who told you
about my uh, little problem?
293
00:20:19,636 --> 00:20:21,438
I can't tell you that.
294
00:20:21,571 --> 00:20:22,974
The Pulitzer.
295
00:20:23,741 --> 00:20:26,344
Your agent. She told Simon to
296
00:20:26,476 --> 00:20:28,079
"treat him
like the alcoholic he is".
297
00:20:28,212 --> 00:20:29,479
Former agent.
298
00:20:29,613 --> 00:20:31,048
Oh, I didn't know.
299
00:20:31,182 --> 00:20:34,051
Neither does she. Tell
me something, did she use the
300
00:20:34,185 --> 00:20:36,386
line about how I "can't possibly
301
00:20:36,519 --> 00:20:38,155
write from
the bottom of a bottle"?
302
00:20:38,756 --> 00:20:40,358
I don't know what she said.
303
00:20:40,490 --> 00:20:41,391
Pulitzer.
304
00:20:41,524 --> 00:20:42,392
Yeah, word for word.
305
00:20:42,525 --> 00:20:43,794
Can we go now?
306
00:20:44,061 --> 00:20:45,796
She stole that line
from me, I'll have you know.
307
00:20:45,930 --> 00:20:48,366
This from a wench who can drink
me under any table in New York.
308
00:20:48,498 --> 00:20:49,466
I'll pull the car up.
309
00:20:49,599 --> 00:20:51,135
Oh God, how much?
310
00:20:51,269 --> 00:20:52,770
How much what?
311
00:20:52,904 --> 00:20:55,072
Over and above whatever it
is, you can round up of course.
312
00:20:55,206 --> 00:20:56,439
Sir.
313
00:20:56,908 --> 00:20:58,608
Preferably, gin, though at this
point I'll take anything this
314
00:20:58,743 --> 00:20:59,844
side of mouthwash.
315
00:20:59,977 --> 00:21:01,045
I told you. I...
316
00:21:01,178 --> 00:21:02,813
20 bucks, 20
bucks for one little drink.
317
00:21:02,947 --> 00:21:04,348
I'm sure once
we get to the hotel...
318
00:21:04,481 --> 00:21:06,684
Get me a goddamn drink!
319
00:21:37,214 --> 00:21:39,016
Go.
320
00:21:39,150 --> 00:21:40,918
What?
321
00:21:41,052 --> 00:21:42,987
You may go.
322
00:21:45,089 --> 00:21:46,223
Go where?
323
00:21:46,657 --> 00:21:49,160
Wherever someone like you goes.
324
00:21:49,293 --> 00:21:50,328
I'm not going without you.
325
00:21:50,460 --> 00:21:51,696
Yes, you are.
326
00:21:52,797 --> 00:21:53,630
You're gonna walk
out that door, you're gonna get
327
00:21:54,231 --> 00:21:55,733
in your car, drive away.
328
00:21:56,968 --> 00:21:59,403
Before you do, however, you are
going to book me on the next
329
00:21:59,569 --> 00:22:00,738
train back to New York.
330
00:22:00,871 --> 00:22:02,505
Well,
Mr. Harris, you can't do that.
331
00:22:02,639 --> 00:22:04,275
I can and I will.
332
00:22:04,408 --> 00:22:05,309
You have rehearsal.
333
00:22:06,177 --> 00:22:07,610
No, no, no,
no, you have rehearsal.
334
00:22:07,745 --> 00:22:09,847
I am going back to New York.
335
00:22:09,981 --> 00:22:11,349
Sir, I'm just
doing what I'm told.
336
00:22:11,481 --> 00:22:12,350
Not yet, you're not.
337
00:22:13,384 --> 00:22:13,985
If I don't deliver you
to rehearsal first thing
338
00:22:14,584 --> 00:22:14,986
tomorrow morning then...
339
00:22:15,720 --> 00:22:17,221
Oh, oh, now I'm a package, am I?
340
00:22:17,355 --> 00:22:18,621
No, no, no...
341
00:22:18,756 --> 00:22:20,024
I'm just,
I'm something to be delivered?
342
00:22:20,157 --> 00:22:21,058
No, no, no, no, no...
343
00:22:21,192 --> 00:22:22,326
Just shipped overnight...
344
00:22:22,460 --> 00:22:23,427
No!
345
00:22:24,527 --> 00:22:25,162
Because I absolutely,
positively have to be there?
346
00:22:26,397 --> 00:22:27,431
I'm sure you'll feel differently
once you've talked to Simon.
347
00:22:27,564 --> 00:22:28,366
He can't wait to meet you.
348
00:22:28,498 --> 00:22:29,033
Apparently, he can.
349
00:22:30,034 --> 00:22:31,135
Because otherwise,
he wouldn't have sent you.
350
00:22:51,856 --> 00:22:54,125
Sir, I'm just an apprentice.
351
00:22:54,658 --> 00:22:56,526
Apprentice to what?
352
00:22:56,660 --> 00:22:58,528
Hmm, I'm sorry?
353
00:22:58,662 --> 00:23:00,530
Stop apologizing!
354
00:23:00,664 --> 00:23:01,832
I'm sorry.
355
00:23:01,966 --> 00:23:02,632
Not!
356
00:23:02,767 --> 00:23:04,201
Not sorry!
357
00:23:06,137 --> 00:23:09,539
Don't tell me
you're studying to be an actor.
358
00:23:10,875 --> 00:23:12,109
I don't have the talent.
359
00:23:12,243 --> 00:23:13,778
You don't need talent.
360
00:23:14,311 --> 00:23:17,815
All you need is a deep-seated
belief that the whole world's
361
00:23:17,948 --> 00:23:19,817
as excited about you as you are.
362
00:23:20,751 --> 00:23:23,087
I wanna be a playwright.
363
00:23:24,321 --> 00:23:25,588
Someday.
364
00:23:25,723 --> 00:23:26,791
Not yet, not now.
365
00:23:27,892 --> 00:23:28,359
I have so much to
learn, but that's why I'm here,
366
00:23:29,427 --> 00:23:30,394
that's why I wanted to
be the one to pick you up.
367
00:23:30,528 --> 00:23:31,295
I had to meet you.
368
00:23:32,530 --> 00:23:34,564
To just... just I don't know, to
just be around you, I guess to
369
00:23:34,698 --> 00:23:36,267
experience your essence.
370
00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:37,334
I have an essence?
371
00:23:37,468 --> 00:23:38,736
No, not... not essence.
372
00:23:38,869 --> 00:23:41,305
No, no, no, I like...
like having an essence.
373
00:23:41,439 --> 00:23:43,140
I told Simon,
"I don't care what time he gets
374
00:23:43,274 --> 00:23:45,009
in, I want to be the one who
gets to pick up the greatest
375
00:23:45,142 --> 00:23:46,677
playwright in the history
of the American Theatre.
376
00:23:46,811 --> 00:23:48,312
In
the history of theatre, period."
377
00:23:49,579 --> 00:23:51,614
Better than O'Neill, better than
Miller, better than William...
378
00:23:51,749 --> 00:23:53,583
Shakespeare?
379
00:23:58,322 --> 00:24:00,157
Yes.
380
00:24:01,125 --> 00:24:02,625
I
have so many questions for you,
381
00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:03,727
I don't know where to start.
382
00:24:05,763 --> 00:24:09,800
Questions
are what make art, art.
383
00:24:09,934 --> 00:24:12,236
Writers on
Writing, published in 1986.
384
00:24:13,537 --> 00:24:16,073
Very good.
385
00:24:16,874 --> 00:24:18,909
I've read everything you've ever
386
00:24:19,043 --> 00:24:21,512
written or
said, for that matter.
387
00:24:22,146 --> 00:24:25,449
The full lengths, the
one acts, the essays, the
388
00:24:25,583 --> 00:24:27,952
monologues, even your Op-Ed
pieces in the New York Times.
389
00:24:28,085 --> 00:24:29,720
One of my favorites was The
390
00:24:29,854 --> 00:24:32,123
State of the American
Theatre, October, 1998.
391
00:24:32,256 --> 00:24:34,158
You were so
eloquent about the need for a
392
00:24:34,291 --> 00:24:36,694
collective voice to speak from
our stage and your prediction
393
00:24:36,827 --> 00:24:37,895
that Broadway would succumb to
394
00:24:38,028 --> 00:24:40,664
uh, how did you put it?
395
00:24:40,798 --> 00:24:42,366
Oh, oh, hang on.
396
00:24:46,470 --> 00:24:50,374
Joseph Harris, 1998.
397
00:24:51,709 --> 00:24:54,612
"In our
quest to find new voices,
398
00:24:54,745 --> 00:24:56,280
the American Stage will turn its
399
00:24:57,548 --> 00:24:59,617
back on its very own, only to
drop the bar and welcome with
400
00:24:59,750 --> 00:25:01,619
open arms
anything with an accent,
401
00:25:01,752 --> 00:25:04,021
preferably ones
spewing Irish blarney,
402
00:25:04,155 --> 00:25:06,557
Royal
pomposity or Cockney slang.
403
00:25:06,690 --> 00:25:08,425
Mark my
words..." I love this part,
404
00:25:08,559 --> 00:25:11,629
"To spend one's life writing for
the American Theatre is to aim
405
00:25:11,762 --> 00:25:14,965
for a place somewhere between
airport paperbacks and the
406
00:25:15,099 --> 00:25:17,301
graffiti located
above a dive bar urinal."
407
00:25:17,434 --> 00:25:19,270
Yeah,
408
00:25:20,738 --> 00:25:22,106
I was drunk.
409
00:25:22,239 --> 00:25:24,008
Well, I found it prophetic.
410
00:25:24,675 --> 00:25:26,110
I had just opened a play
411
00:25:27,244 --> 00:25:29,513
that included a 10-minute
sequence where one of the
412
00:25:30,281 --> 00:25:35,085
fattest actors you've ever seen
dropped his pants and farted
413
00:25:35,219 --> 00:25:37,288
into the face of the audience.
414
00:25:38,889 --> 00:25:42,661
Needless to say, the
critics were not kind.
415
00:25:43,727 --> 00:25:48,732
So I wrote to the Times,
explaining it was a metaphor for
416
00:25:48,866 --> 00:25:51,969
the slow,
poisonous disintegration of
417
00:25:52,102 --> 00:25:53,337
Creative America.
418
00:25:53,470 --> 00:25:57,141
I think they
published it out of pity.
419
00:25:57,641 --> 00:26:01,011
Another American playwright
screaming from the ledge.
420
00:26:01,545 --> 00:26:04,114
Yeah, but you were right.
421
00:26:04,615 --> 00:26:06,483
Hardly.
422
00:26:06,617 --> 00:26:09,453
Though I must say, if
the actor had farted in an
423
00:26:09,587 --> 00:26:12,189
English accent, the
play would still be running.
424
00:26:13,190 --> 00:26:15,593
No one writes for the
theatre anymore, Mr. Waters.
425
00:26:15,726 --> 00:26:16,594
No, no, no, that's... that's...
426
00:26:16,727 --> 00:26:17,928
No, it's true.
427
00:26:18,829 --> 00:26:21,031
It's all
screenplays, and cable deals,
428
00:26:21,165 --> 00:26:23,834
and getting a
seat at the table with
429
00:26:23,968 --> 00:26:25,803
a dozen other ex-playwrights.
430
00:26:25,936 --> 00:26:27,471
But you can't really
blame them, can you?
431
00:26:27,605 --> 00:26:30,074
I mean the...
the theatre won't support you,
432
00:26:30,207 --> 00:26:33,844
you have to follow
the herd out to California,
433
00:26:34,578 --> 00:26:38,115
get paid a king's ransom,
because you can spell your name.
434
00:26:38,549 --> 00:26:40,551
Yeah, but... but you didn't.
435
00:26:41,085 --> 00:26:43,187
Much to my accountant's dismay.
436
00:26:43,320 --> 00:26:45,690
Active duty military discounts.
437
00:26:45,823 --> 00:26:50,160
All active duty military are
entitled to discounts up to 50%.
438
00:26:50,894 --> 00:26:52,263
When others turned their backs,
439
00:26:53,330 --> 00:26:54,231
you nobly clung to your
principles, hanging on to
440
00:26:55,065 --> 00:26:55,599
what it means
to be a true artist.
441
00:26:56,701 --> 00:26:59,970
Call Expedition today.
442
00:27:00,204 --> 00:27:01,972
As a relaxing alternative to
443
00:27:02,106 --> 00:27:04,275
today's airport
body scan, the latest bomb scans
444
00:27:24,094 --> 00:27:26,063
Stowing away
is against the law.
445
00:27:26,196 --> 00:27:28,733
Any activity around
the train that is illegal
446
00:27:28,866 --> 00:27:31,535
please contact
Expedition employees.
447
00:27:31,670 --> 00:27:33,570
Thank you and have a good day.
448
00:27:35,774 --> 00:27:37,709
Hardly noble.
449
00:27:38,342 --> 00:27:41,845
To me, you are. To me,
you are the American Theatre.
450
00:27:41,979 --> 00:27:43,213
Strong words, I know.
451
00:27:43,347 --> 00:27:44,248
No, no...
452
00:27:45,482 --> 00:27:46,216
But there is no one and I mean
no one with your uncompromising
453
00:27:46,817 --> 00:27:47,284
commitment to your art.
454
00:27:48,018 --> 00:27:49,286
It is because of you that I have
455
00:27:49,420 --> 00:27:51,021
decided to
commit my life to the theatre.
456
00:27:51,155 --> 00:27:52,724
It is your art, your
craft, your brilliance that has
457
00:27:52,856 --> 00:27:54,358
opened up the creativity...
That lies within my very soul.
458
00:27:54,491 --> 00:27:55,526
Here, just
shut up! Just shut up.
459
00:27:55,660 --> 00:27:57,094
Just take that.
460
00:27:58,763 --> 00:28:00,064
What? What's this?
461
00:28:00,197 --> 00:28:01,465
It's the advance.
462
00:28:01,999 --> 00:28:04,001
Much as I love
being paid to write,
463
00:28:04,134 --> 00:28:06,303
I hate
being paid not to even more.
464
00:28:07,137 --> 00:28:08,539
I don't understand.
465
00:28:09,106 --> 00:28:11,308
There is no play.
466
00:28:12,677 --> 00:28:14,545
What?
467
00:28:14,679 --> 00:28:16,447
I haven't written a word.
468
00:28:17,981 --> 00:28:21,786
I'd apologize,
but I'm in the arts, so...
469
00:28:21,919 --> 00:28:23,087
Is this some kind of joke?
470
00:28:23,220 --> 00:28:25,122
This is not a joke.
471
00:28:27,558 --> 00:28:29,026
This is not a joke.
472
00:28:29,159 --> 00:28:31,895
I think we've
established this is not a joke.
473
00:28:32,329 --> 00:28:33,597
But we have to have a play.
474
00:28:33,732 --> 00:28:34,932
Well, if I don't have one,
475
00:28:35,065 --> 00:28:36,233
there's no way
you're going to have one.
476
00:28:36,367 --> 00:28:37,401
But
we... we... we commissioned you.
477
00:28:38,535 --> 00:28:39,671
I had a couple ideas, a
couple things I thought might
478
00:28:41,004 --> 00:28:44,441
have legs enough to sail past
page 20, flourish into something
479
00:28:44,575 --> 00:28:47,746
grand, an... an...
an epic drama, perhaps.
480
00:28:47,878 --> 00:28:52,416
A comedy! I'd have settled for a
comedy, but in the end, nothing.
481
00:28:52,549 --> 00:28:53,484
Uh, wait.
482
00:28:54,719 --> 00:28:56,721
Though, I did have one idea
about a girl and her dog, and
483
00:28:56,855 --> 00:28:58,122
then the dog died and the girl
484
00:28:59,089 --> 00:29:00,023
turned into a
transvestite and I thought,
485
00:29:00,725 --> 00:29:01,358
Well, that's hardly original.
486
00:29:01,959 --> 00:29:02,926
Mr. Harris!
487
00:29:03,060 --> 00:29:03,961
Make the dog the transvestite.
488
00:29:04,094 --> 00:29:05,162
You sent us a first draft.
489
00:29:05,929 --> 00:29:07,030
Of what?
490
00:29:07,164 --> 00:29:08,599
Simon told the
staff it was brilliant.
491
00:29:08,733 --> 00:29:10,467
The only thing of any brilliance
492
00:29:10,601 --> 00:29:15,038
were Simon's efforts
to cover his artistic ass.
493
00:29:16,273 --> 00:29:18,942
I called and told him that
what I had wasn't readable.
494
00:29:19,076 --> 00:29:22,012
Little advice, when a playwright
calls to say that his play isn't
495
00:29:22,146 --> 00:29:24,281
readable, it's 'cause
there's nothing to read.
496
00:29:26,950 --> 00:29:28,051
I'm calling Simon.
497
00:29:28,185 --> 00:29:29,186
Do 'Up a Lonely River'.
498
00:29:29,319 --> 00:29:30,621
We just did it two months ago!
499
00:29:30,755 --> 00:29:31,588
Do it again.
500
00:29:31,723 --> 00:29:32,990
We can't do it again!
501
00:29:33,123 --> 00:29:34,558
Oh, sure you can.
Tell 'em it's a rerun.
502
00:29:34,692 --> 00:29:36,226
You don't understand,
we've announced it to the world!
503
00:29:36,360 --> 00:29:38,061
Oh, good Lord, I hope
you have enough seats.
504
00:29:38,195 --> 00:29:39,563
Mr. Harris, this is
a very big deal for us.
505
00:29:39,697 --> 00:29:41,165
For the first
time in our history,
506
00:29:41,298 --> 00:29:42,801
Variety is
sending their Chicago critic.
507
00:29:42,933 --> 00:29:45,502
Sir, could you please
tell me the estimated time of
508
00:29:45,636 --> 00:29:47,571
departure for
the next train to New York?
509
00:29:47,705 --> 00:29:48,605
5:45.
510
00:29:48,740 --> 00:29:49,674
Where do I transfer?
511
00:29:50,875 --> 00:29:52,509
Local stops to Toledo. Transfer
to the Express from there.
512
00:29:52,643 --> 00:29:53,243
I'll take it.
513
00:29:53,377 --> 00:29:54,244
No, he doesn't want it!
514
00:29:54,378 --> 00:29:55,312
- Round trip?
- No!
515
00:29:55,446 --> 00:29:56,513
- God, no.
- Window or aisle?
516
00:29:56,647 --> 00:29:57,548
Neither!
Window.
517
00:29:58,649 --> 00:29:59,651
Mr. Harris, please don't
do this, I'm begging you.
518
00:29:59,784 --> 00:30:00,250
Will you just relax.
519
00:30:01,218 --> 00:30:02,419
Welcome to the
exciting world of train travel.
520
00:30:02,553 --> 00:30:03,954
Not everything
in life is your fault.
521
00:30:04,087 --> 00:30:04,889
By purchasing
a round trip ticket...
522
00:30:05,022 --> 00:30:05,956
Yes, yes, yes, okay.
523
00:30:06,089 --> 00:30:07,224
No, not this shit, trust me.
524
00:30:07,357 --> 00:30:08,025
Seniors, if you
are young at heart...
525
00:30:08,158 --> 00:30:08,860
Okay, somehow...
526
00:30:08,992 --> 00:30:09,928
I'll take it.
527
00:30:10,060 --> 00:30:11,328
get 5% off the regular fare.
528
00:30:11,462 --> 00:30:12,429
Phew, oh my
God, Simon's gonna kill me.
529
00:30:12,563 --> 00:30:13,698
Students, take advantage of...
530
00:30:13,832 --> 00:30:14,598
Do I look like a student to you?
531
00:30:14,732 --> 00:30:15,667
Please, hey, hey!
532
00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:17,234
price of an unrestricted ticket.
533
00:30:17,367 --> 00:30:17,902
Mr. Harris, whatever I
did or didn't do, I'm sorry.
534
00:30:18,035 --> 00:30:18,502
Not.
535
00:30:19,671 --> 00:30:20,270
I'm whatever I have to be
to keep you from doing this!
536
00:30:21,038 --> 00:30:21,873
My stay here is over. Finished.
537
00:30:22,005 --> 00:30:23,140
All military persons...
538
00:30:23,273 --> 00:30:24,274
Listen, just
talk to Simon, okay?
539
00:30:24,408 --> 00:30:25,375
-continental United States.
540
00:30:25,509 --> 00:30:26,310
Military?
541
00:30:26,443 --> 00:30:27,511
Fare may be higher during...
542
00:30:27,644 --> 00:30:29,379
- What's the damage?
- 152 bucks.
543
00:30:30,013 --> 00:30:31,315
Give me 152 bucks.
544
00:30:31,448 --> 00:30:32,583
Do I look rich to you?
545
00:30:32,717 --> 00:30:33,651
Yes.
546
00:30:33,785 --> 00:30:34,786
You want the ticket or not?
547
00:30:34,919 --> 00:30:36,253
No!
He's not going anywhere!
548
00:30:36,386 --> 00:30:37,789
I thought you said you
was takin' him somewhere.
549
00:30:37,922 --> 00:30:41,024
I... I am. Okay, we are
in the process of leaving, okay?
550
00:30:41,158 --> 00:30:42,259
We just haven't left yet.
551
00:30:46,230 --> 00:30:51,134
And you've been
holding out on me? Huh?
552
00:30:51,870 --> 00:30:53,738
I got $3!
553
00:30:54,371 --> 00:30:57,842
And what pray tell is this?
554
00:30:57,976 --> 00:30:58,943
Nothing.
555
00:30:59,076 --> 00:31:00,310
- Give it to me.
- Is this a play?
556
00:31:00,444 --> 00:31:01,813
- Give it back.
- You really are a playwright.
557
00:31:01,946 --> 00:31:04,014
I am not a playwright!
558
00:31:04,849 --> 00:31:07,050
I am not a playwright.
559
00:31:07,551 --> 00:31:12,623
Cancel his ticket. I am
here to pick you up, that's it.
560
00:31:12,757 --> 00:31:14,692
I will be in the car.
561
00:31:14,826 --> 00:31:17,261
You want me to read it?
562
00:31:28,305 --> 00:31:30,140
Yeah. Yeah, right.
563
00:31:43,888 --> 00:31:46,456
You would read my play?
564
00:31:49,159 --> 00:31:52,329
It's why you
brought it, isn't it?
565
00:31:56,968 --> 00:31:58,235
You're serious.
566
00:31:59,603 --> 00:32:01,104
Going once.
567
00:32:01,238 --> 00:32:03,041
Yes, yes! Yes, of course!
568
00:32:03,173 --> 00:32:04,809
While I wait for my train.
569
00:32:04,943 --> 00:32:06,376
Mr. Harris, please.
570
00:32:06,510 --> 00:32:09,513
Have you ever
seen a Pulitzer Prize?
571
00:32:10,213 --> 00:32:13,150
As trophies go,
it's very tasteful.
572
00:32:13,283 --> 00:32:16,654
Elegant,
even distinguished.
573
00:32:17,421 --> 00:32:19,891
Mr. Harris, if you get
on that train, I'll be fired.
574
00:32:20,024 --> 00:32:22,326
I'm proud to say that I have
575
00:32:22,459 --> 00:32:25,362
been banned for life
576
00:32:25,495 --> 00:32:27,197
from
the Cornelia Street Playhouse.
577
00:32:27,331 --> 00:32:28,265
In Philadelphia.
578
00:32:28,398 --> 00:32:29,566
You've been to Philadelphia?
579
00:32:29,701 --> 00:32:30,835
No, but...
580
00:32:30,969 --> 00:32:32,904
As soon as you
arrive, you realize you're the
581
00:32:33,037 --> 00:32:34,371
smartest person in town.
582
00:32:34,504 --> 00:32:35,773
We were doing
The Man Who Died A...
583
00:32:35,907 --> 00:32:36,841
The Man Who Died Again.
584
00:32:36,975 --> 00:32:38,042
Oh, you know this story?
585
00:32:38,175 --> 00:32:39,343
- No, only that...
- Well then, shut up.
586
00:32:40,210 --> 00:32:42,112
I'm waxing poetic about myself.
587
00:32:42,245 --> 00:32:44,514
Much like
with the visiting muse,
588
00:32:44,648 --> 00:32:45,883
it doesn't happen that often,
589
00:32:46,818 --> 00:32:49,721
so you're
aware of writing via the muse.
590
00:32:49,854 --> 00:32:50,788
Yes, of course.
591
00:32:51,254 --> 00:32:52,289
Do you have one?
592
00:32:52,422 --> 00:32:53,858
Doesn't everybody?
593
00:32:53,992 --> 00:32:54,726
Where is it?
594
00:32:54,859 --> 00:32:56,226
Where's what?
595
00:32:56,360 --> 00:32:58,462
Your muse, I'd like to meet him.
596
00:32:58,595 --> 00:33:00,130
Or her.
597
00:33:00,263 --> 00:33:02,132
Maybe it's
her... it. Maybe it's an "it".
598
00:33:02,265 --> 00:33:03,400
I don't...
599
00:33:05,268 --> 00:33:05,837
Not having one myself,
600
00:33:06,671 --> 00:33:09,473
I'm curious as
to what one looks like.
601
00:33:09,606 --> 00:33:12,810
A little bird sits on
your shoulder, chirping its way
602
00:33:12,944 --> 00:33:16,513
through your story like
some know-it-all tour guide.
603
00:33:17,081 --> 00:33:18,382
What about the inner voice?
604
00:33:18,515 --> 00:33:19,751
You're hearing voices?
605
00:33:19,884 --> 00:33:22,654
Simon said every
artist has an inner voice.
606
00:33:24,554 --> 00:33:26,691
If Simon is hearing voices,
607
00:33:26,824 --> 00:33:28,693
he should be
locked in a padded room.
608
00:33:28,826 --> 00:33:31,294
I wrote every one of my
plays without the assistance of
609
00:33:31,428 --> 00:33:32,562
anyone, thank you very much.
610
00:33:32,697 --> 00:33:34,331
Including artistic directors who
611
00:33:34,464 --> 00:33:36,366
were too
important to meet my train.
612
00:33:36,500 --> 00:33:37,434
What are you doing?
613
00:33:37,567 --> 00:33:38,670
I'm calling Simon.
614
00:33:46,044 --> 00:33:48,178
Oh, no, no, no, no!
615
00:33:48,311 --> 00:33:49,212
Oh my God!
616
00:33:49,346 --> 00:33:51,082
Oh my God, stop!
617
00:33:51,214 --> 00:33:53,651
Stop! Oh!
618
00:33:54,719 --> 00:33:56,353
Now give me your credit card.
619
00:33:56,486 --> 00:33:57,789
You broke my phone!
620
00:33:57,922 --> 00:33:58,856
Your credit card!
621
00:33:58,990 --> 00:33:59,957
I don't have a credit card!
622
00:34:00,091 --> 00:34:01,025
Of course, you do!
623
00:34:02,325 --> 00:34:03,995
Every young person in today's
theatre has a credit card, a toy
624
00:34:04,128 --> 00:34:05,529
phone, and a Lamborghini!
625
00:34:05,663 --> 00:34:07,497
Bought and paid for by
well-funded parents who can't
626
00:34:07,631 --> 00:34:09,366
stand the idea of their son
627
00:34:09,499 --> 00:34:11,736
going into such
a vagrant profession!
628
00:34:11,869 --> 00:34:12,602
Let me guess?
629
00:34:12,737 --> 00:34:14,172
Daddy and mommy wanted their son
630
00:34:14,304 --> 00:34:16,140
who's not a
playwright to be a doctor?
631
00:34:16,273 --> 00:34:17,240
No.
632
00:34:17,374 --> 00:34:18,608
A lawyer? How about a lawyer?
633
00:34:19,576 --> 00:34:20,610
How about President
of the United States?
634
00:34:21,478 --> 00:34:22,479
They've lowered
the entry requirements,
635
00:34:22,612 --> 00:34:23,748
I don't know if you've heard!
636
00:34:24,648 --> 00:34:27,151
Wing nuts!
My family's into wing nuts!
637
00:34:27,284 --> 00:34:28,986
It's the small nut
638
00:34:29,120 --> 00:34:31,155
with the little metal
wings on it, so you can screw...
639
00:34:31,288 --> 00:34:32,190
I know what a...
640
00:34:33,356 --> 00:34:35,727
We're the largest wing nut
manufacturer in the Midwest.
641
00:34:41,032 --> 00:34:42,900
Where would the
world be without the wing nut?
642
00:34:43,034 --> 00:34:46,636
Yeah, that's what my
father says every Thanksgiving.
643
00:34:46,771 --> 00:34:50,708
And I nod, answering a question
he never asks, assuring him that
644
00:34:50,842 --> 00:34:53,543
yes, some day I will come
crawling back, begging him to
645
00:34:53,678 --> 00:34:57,882
please let me spend the
rest of my life in wing nuts.
646
00:35:04,321 --> 00:35:07,491
All because you looked down from
your end of the table and said,
647
00:35:07,624 --> 00:35:09,026
"I want to be in the Arts."
648
00:35:10,928 --> 00:35:13,563
I might as well have said I was
running off to join the circus.
649
00:35:14,165 --> 00:35:15,432
You are.
650
00:35:16,466 --> 00:35:17,735
He said "The-a-tre is
no place for a real man.
651
00:35:17,869 --> 00:35:21,471
It's nothing but
lowlifes, misfits, and..."
652
00:35:51,169 --> 00:35:56,573
Does this Simon person, with no
play to direct, have any talent?
653
00:35:57,307 --> 00:36:00,343
Very much so. Yes.
654
00:36:00,878 --> 00:36:04,414
Last season he
won the Lima Award for his
655
00:36:04,548 --> 00:36:05,817
production of Our Town.
656
00:36:06,550 --> 00:36:08,786
He won a what?
657
00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:10,121
A Lima.
658
00:36:10,655 --> 00:36:12,522
It's our local
in-house theatre award.
659
00:36:12,657 --> 00:36:14,225
We have the
ceremony at the end of the year.
660
00:36:14,357 --> 00:36:15,927
Everybody comes. It's nice.
661
00:36:16,060 --> 00:36:18,296
It's not a Tony or a Pulitzer,
but then we're not New York.
662
00:36:18,461 --> 00:36:19,964
You're not even Philadelphia.
663
00:36:20,097 --> 00:36:21,464
Has he read the play?
664
00:36:21,598 --> 00:36:22,867
Oh God, no.
665
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:23,901
And why not?
666
00:36:24,068 --> 00:36:25,169
Well, he was going to.
667
00:36:26,403 --> 00:36:27,839
He really was, and then for
whatever reason, he didn't get
668
00:36:29,106 --> 00:36:29,974
to it, which is completely
understandable. He's very busy.
669
00:36:30,107 --> 00:36:31,408
Winning Limas.
670
00:36:31,976 --> 00:36:33,044
My Mother read it.
671
00:36:33,177 --> 00:36:34,477
Did she love it?
672
00:36:34,611 --> 00:36:37,815
Not really. When I asked her
673
00:36:37,949 --> 00:36:39,116
what she
liked about it, she said,
674
00:36:39,250 --> 00:36:40,685
"The pages were in order."
675
00:36:40,818 --> 00:36:42,220
Hmm.
676
00:36:42,352 --> 00:36:43,587
I thought
that was a little harsh.
677
00:36:44,255 --> 00:36:45,756
Do you have a title?
678
00:36:45,890 --> 00:36:47,058
A title.
679
00:36:47,191 --> 00:36:49,626
For this brilliant
play I'm about to read.
680
00:36:49,760 --> 00:36:51,461
Oh, I'd rather not say.
681
00:36:51,996 --> 00:36:54,932
Oh, I'd Rather
Not Say by Kenneth Waters.
682
00:36:55,066 --> 00:36:55,967
Very funny.
683
00:36:57,001 --> 00:36:58,602
Let's imagine
that up on a marquee, shall we?
684
00:36:58,736 --> 00:37:01,105
That's the first thing I
do whenever I finish a play.
685
00:37:01,239 --> 00:37:05,343
I take a cab up to the Belasco,
still best theatre in New York,
686
00:37:05,475 --> 00:37:10,047
bar none, and I stand on the
opposite side of the street and
687
00:37:10,181 --> 00:37:13,050
I try to picture
my title up in lights.
688
00:37:13,184 --> 00:37:14,618
And if I can envision it...
689
00:37:14,752 --> 00:37:16,220
The Great American Play.
690
00:37:16,354 --> 00:37:17,288
It hasn't been written yet.
691
00:37:17,420 --> 00:37:18,723
Never will be, for that matter.
692
00:37:18,856 --> 00:37:21,158
In art, there can never
be a greatest anything.
693
00:37:21,292 --> 00:37:26,097
Play, novel,
painting, symphony, burger, try
694
00:37:26,230 --> 00:37:29,333
as we might, it will never be
because as soon as one of us
695
00:37:29,466 --> 00:37:31,068
gets close, it will be missed.
696
00:37:31,202 --> 00:37:33,204
Or, more than likely, dismissed.
697
00:37:34,038 --> 00:37:37,675
We are no longer qualified
to recognize greatness.
698
00:37:38,376 --> 00:37:42,713
We have no
idea what it looks like.
699
00:37:45,016 --> 00:37:50,420
To recognize true greatness, one
must be willing to be troubled.
700
00:37:52,056 --> 00:37:54,125
Disturbed.
701
00:37:56,093 --> 00:37:58,696
Changed.
702
00:37:59,297 --> 00:38:03,034
And no one wants to
be any of those things.
703
00:38:05,435 --> 00:38:07,570
That's the title.
704
00:38:10,540 --> 00:38:13,610
Of what?
705
00:38:15,313 --> 00:38:16,681
My play.
706
00:38:17,248 --> 00:38:21,819
The title of your play
is The Great American Play?
707
00:38:23,020 --> 00:38:24,855
Yes.
708
00:38:25,588 --> 00:38:28,759
Out of all the possible titles.
709
00:38:28,893 --> 00:38:29,961
I know.
710
00:38:33,898 --> 00:38:34,832
Is it?
711
00:38:35,433 --> 00:38:37,068
It's just the title.
712
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:40,271
So it's not
the Great American Play.
713
00:38:40,404 --> 00:38:41,339
Far from it.
714
00:38:42,406 --> 00:38:44,008
And yet, your title
would lead me to believe...
715
00:38:44,141 --> 00:38:45,343
Tentative title.
716
00:38:45,475 --> 00:38:47,411
Well, don't change it
now. It might be perfect.
717
00:38:47,544 --> 00:38:48,645
It's just a play.
718
00:38:57,755 --> 00:38:59,957
There is no such thing
719
00:39:02,660 --> 00:39:04,061
as "just a play".
720
00:39:14,604 --> 00:39:17,808
This is your art. Say it.
721
00:39:18,508 --> 00:39:19,509
Say what?
722
00:39:19,642 --> 00:39:20,878
This is my art.
723
00:39:21,412 --> 00:39:22,813
This is my art.
724
00:39:22,947 --> 00:39:23,948
Louder.
725
00:39:24,081 --> 00:39:25,950
This is my art.
726
00:39:26,083 --> 00:39:27,251
This is my art!
727
00:39:27,385 --> 00:39:28,585
This is my art!
728
00:39:28,719 --> 00:39:30,721
I am an artist
and this is my art!
729
00:39:30,855 --> 00:39:32,555
I am an artist
and this is my art!
730
00:39:32,690 --> 00:39:34,058
I am an artist
and this is my art!
731
00:39:34,191 --> 00:39:35,893
I am an
artist and this is my art!
732
00:39:36,027 --> 00:39:37,728
I am an artist
and this is my art!
733
00:39:37,862 --> 00:39:39,430
I am an artist
and this is my art!
734
00:39:39,562 --> 00:39:40,831
I am an artist
and this is my art!
735
00:39:40,965 --> 00:39:42,066
I am an
artist and this is my art!
736
00:39:42,199 --> 00:39:43,533
I am an
artist and this is my art!
737
00:39:43,667 --> 00:39:44,935
I am an
artist and this is my art!
738
00:39:45,069 --> 00:39:46,536
I am an
artist and this is my art!
739
00:39:46,670 --> 00:39:48,039
I am an
artist and this is my art!
740
00:39:49,206 --> 00:39:50,408
I am an artist, Mr.
Harris! Mr. Harris, Mr. Harris!
741
00:39:51,375 --> 00:39:52,910
Keep off my pew!
This is my pew!
742
00:39:53,044 --> 00:39:54,644
I am
an artist and this is my art!
743
00:39:56,013 --> 00:39:58,983
I am an artist and this is art.
744
00:39:59,116 --> 00:40:01,819
I am an artist
and this is my art!
745
00:40:01,952 --> 00:40:04,155
I am an artist and this is my...
746
00:40:04,288 --> 00:40:06,424
I am an artist
and this is my art!
747
00:40:08,359 --> 00:40:09,527
I am an artist...
748
00:40:09,660 --> 00:40:10,795
Get outta here!
749
00:40:11,829 --> 00:40:14,331
I am an art...
I am an artist. I am an artist.
750
00:40:15,533 --> 00:40:16,834
I am an artist.
751
00:40:16,967 --> 00:40:18,836
Mr. Harris?
752
00:40:19,136 --> 00:40:20,805
I am an artist.
753
00:40:22,006 --> 00:40:25,209
Mr. Harris,
there's a train! Mr. Harris!
754
00:40:26,277 --> 00:40:28,079
Mr. Harris!
755
00:40:41,959 --> 00:40:44,095
Mr. Harris, where are
you... where are you going?
756
00:40:44,228 --> 00:40:45,796
Mr.... Mr. Harris!
757
00:40:48,265 --> 00:40:49,500
I didn't call the cops.
758
00:40:49,632 --> 00:40:50,568
I appreciate it.
759
00:40:51,435 --> 00:40:52,303
Just keep
him the hell off my pews.
760
00:40:52,436 --> 00:40:53,270
I will, I will.
761
00:40:54,305 --> 00:40:54,972
Them come straight
outta the Methodist Church.
762
00:40:55,638 --> 00:40:56,774
Jesus Himself sat in 'em.
763
00:40:58,175 --> 00:41:00,111
Yeah, okay.
764
00:41:00,244 --> 00:41:01,812
Mr. Harris!
765
00:41:02,980 --> 00:41:06,383
Mr. Harris! Mr.
Harris, are you okay?
766
00:41:06,517 --> 00:41:07,918
Mr. Harris!
767
00:41:08,052 --> 00:41:09,487
Do you remember 9/11?
768
00:41:09,619 --> 00:41:11,255
Huh?
769
00:41:11,388 --> 00:41:12,790
Do you remember 9/11?
770
00:41:12,923 --> 00:41:14,391
Yes, of course.
771
00:41:14,525 --> 00:41:15,693
What did you think?
772
00:41:16,427 --> 00:41:17,461
What did I think?
773
00:41:18,395 --> 00:41:19,563
What did you... tell
me what you thought.
774
00:41:20,764 --> 00:41:22,366
I thought it was a tragedy.
It changed the whole world.
775
00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:24,835
I thought it was Shakespearean.
776
00:41:25,970 --> 00:41:27,037
Did you think
it was Shakespearean?
777
00:41:27,171 --> 00:41:28,139
I thought it w...
778
00:41:28,272 --> 00:41:29,173
Yeah, definitely.
779
00:41:30,407 --> 00:41:32,243
I'd like to think if the Bard
had written it, he might've
780
00:41:32,376 --> 00:41:34,211
toned down on some
of the gruesomeness.
781
00:41:35,212 --> 00:41:37,882
Even he
couldn't have written that day.
782
00:41:39,383 --> 00:41:42,353
Look, Mr. Harris,
just talk this out, okay?
783
00:41:42,486 --> 00:41:43,354
We'll get in my car.
784
00:41:43,487 --> 00:41:44,488
Please.
785
00:41:44,622 --> 00:41:45,689
I have a MasterCard.
786
00:41:45,823 --> 00:41:47,791
I have a MasterCard!
787
00:41:47,925 --> 00:41:48,926
You're right!
788
00:41:49,059 --> 00:41:50,694
And I will use that MasterCard
789
00:41:50,828 --> 00:41:54,198
to pay for your
ticket after you read my play.
790
00:41:55,699 --> 00:41:58,536
Before.
791
00:41:58,669 --> 00:42:02,373
After. I'm going to lose
everything, Mr. Harris. My
792
00:42:02,506 --> 00:42:04,341
apprenticeship, my
affiliation with the theatre,
793
00:42:04,475 --> 00:42:07,211
and there's a very good chance
I may wind up back in wing nuts!
794
00:42:07,344 --> 00:42:09,780
So when you say you're gonna
read my play, I need to know
795
00:42:09,914 --> 00:42:11,815
you're really
going to read my play.
796
00:42:13,083 --> 00:42:14,151
Even if it kills me.
797
00:42:14,285 --> 00:42:15,654
Look, on one condition.
798
00:42:15,786 --> 00:42:17,955
You,
you have to tell me the truth.
799
00:42:18,088 --> 00:42:19,256
Huh.
800
00:42:19,990 --> 00:42:21,592
I also have a condition.
801
00:42:21,725 --> 00:42:23,928
Yeah, anything. You name it.
802
00:42:24,628 --> 00:42:26,397
Alcohol.
803
00:42:28,365 --> 00:42:29,466
Okay, alcohol. Okay.
804
00:42:37,575 --> 00:42:38,776
No, no!
805
00:42:53,591 --> 00:42:54,659
Hey, liquor run!
806
00:42:54,792 --> 00:42:55,826
Liquor run!
807
00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:57,528
It's 2:45, we're closed!
808
00:42:57,662 --> 00:42:58,629
Come on, man!
809
00:42:58,762 --> 00:43:00,531
I have never been more closed.
810
00:43:00,665 --> 00:43:01,599
Come on!
811
00:43:02,833 --> 00:43:04,235
I'm more closed than my options
after I failed high school.
812
00:43:04,368 --> 00:43:05,704
I'm desperate.
813
00:43:05,836 --> 00:43:07,972
I'm more closed than the casket
was on my father's funeral.
814
00:43:08,105 --> 00:43:09,440
I'm more closed than the
815
00:43:09,573 --> 00:43:11,442
chance to
reconcile with my girlfriend.
816
00:43:11,575 --> 00:43:14,845
I'm so closed, I
can feel my biological processes
817
00:43:14,979 --> 00:43:15,879
shutting down!
818
00:43:16,013 --> 00:43:17,014
I got it!
819
00:43:32,396 --> 00:43:34,733
Gas station, there is.
Bar's closed, bar's closed now.
820
00:43:34,865 --> 00:43:36,066
Oh, Hope! Hope!
821
00:43:47,645 --> 00:43:50,749
Hope!
822
00:43:50,881 --> 00:43:54,018
Hope! Hope!
823
00:43:56,220 --> 00:44:00,457
Hope! Hope!
Hope, Hope! Hope, Hope, hi!
824
00:44:00,591 --> 00:44:02,359
Step away from the door. 1...
825
00:44:02,493 --> 00:44:03,460
No, no, no, no, wait!
826
00:44:03,594 --> 00:44:04,528
2...
827
00:44:04,663 --> 00:44:05,562
No, it's me! Kenneth Waters!
828
00:44:06,797 --> 00:44:08,399
We dated in high school and
after the Sadie Hawkins Dance,
829
00:44:08,532 --> 00:44:09,266
I told you I loved you
and how I wanted to marry you
830
00:44:12,903 --> 00:44:14,471
Wing nut?
831
00:44:39,698 --> 00:44:42,599
What have you been doing with
yourself other than drinking?
832
00:44:42,734 --> 00:44:43,702
I'm in the theatre.
833
00:44:43,834 --> 00:44:44,902
Cineplex?
834
00:44:45,035 --> 00:44:46,437
No. The legit theatre,
835
00:44:46,570 --> 00:44:48,072
I'm an apprentice
at the Lima Playhouse.
836
00:44:48,205 --> 00:44:50,474
What happened
to making wing nuts?
837
00:44:50,607 --> 00:44:51,909
Yeah, it wasn't for me.
838
00:44:52,476 --> 00:44:54,144
Are you an actor?
839
00:44:54,278 --> 00:44:56,480
Uh, no, I'm... I write.
840
00:44:56,613 --> 00:44:58,282
Write what?
841
00:44:58,415 --> 00:44:59,383
Plays.
842
00:45:00,317 --> 00:45:01,552
You mean like pretend?
843
00:45:01,686 --> 00:45:04,121
Yeah, no.
No, they're real. The plays
844
00:45:04,254 --> 00:45:06,791
are real. Only they're
not. It's hard to explain.
845
00:45:07,358 --> 00:45:09,761
You
should've gone into wing nuts.
846
00:45:09,893 --> 00:45:11,562
Vicki told me
I should reconsider.
847
00:45:11,696 --> 00:45:14,365
I said reconsider
what, we're sophomores in high
848
00:45:14,498 --> 00:45:16,300
school, there's plenty of
fish in the sea, you know?
849
00:45:16,433 --> 00:45:18,569
The
Junior Class alone was loaded.
850
00:45:18,703 --> 00:45:20,839
Yeah, well, we were
kids, what did we know.
851
00:45:20,971 --> 00:45:23,874
I'm not seeing any gin.
852
00:45:24,007 --> 00:45:25,943
All I got is beer and wine.
853
00:45:26,076 --> 00:45:28,479
Yeah, okay.
854
00:45:30,514 --> 00:45:33,450
You would not
believe the night I'm having.
855
00:45:34,084 --> 00:45:35,619
Do you know
who Joseph Harris is?
856
00:45:35,754 --> 00:45:37,054
Was he in our class?
857
00:45:38,222 --> 00:45:40,859
No, he's a playwright
and he's here right now in Lima,
858
00:45:40,991 --> 00:45:42,359
at the train station,
859
00:45:42,493 --> 00:45:43,894
reading my play.
860
00:45:44,863 --> 00:45:47,364
Are you dating anybody?
861
00:45:48,198 --> 00:45:50,601
I got Mondays off.
862
00:45:50,735 --> 00:45:51,703
You could take me to the
863
00:45:52,737 --> 00:45:53,470
playhouse and I can
watch you write somethin'.
864
00:45:54,171 --> 00:45:54,806
Well, it's not that exciting.
865
00:45:56,073 --> 00:45:58,208
Is it more exciting than selling
beer at 3:15 in the morning?
866
00:46:06,818 --> 00:46:09,153
Trapped inside a little box.
867
00:46:09,821 --> 00:46:12,623
Of your own making, I might add.
868
00:46:14,391 --> 00:46:16,326
I know.
869
00:46:17,094 --> 00:46:18,830
You know?
870
00:46:18,962 --> 00:46:22,399
You don't think I do, but I do.
871
00:46:23,133 --> 00:46:25,235
And what is it you know?
872
00:46:25,369 --> 00:46:29,006
I know who said,
the "first sign of
873
00:46:29,139 --> 00:46:32,409
understanding
is the wish to die".
874
00:46:33,912 --> 00:46:36,246
Dostoevsky.
875
00:46:36,848 --> 00:46:39,082
Kafka.
876
00:46:48,158 --> 00:46:49,928
Franz.
877
00:46:50,060 --> 00:46:50,929
Lawrence.
878
00:46:51,061 --> 00:46:51,930
How's it goin'?
879
00:46:52,062 --> 00:46:53,163
Okay.
880
00:46:53,297 --> 00:46:55,532
Like Grand
Central in here tonight.
881
00:46:55,667 --> 00:46:57,301
He's from New York.
882
00:46:57,434 --> 00:46:58,635
What's he doin' here?
883
00:46:58,770 --> 00:46:59,904
Theatre.
884
00:47:00,037 --> 00:47:01,104
Cineplex?
885
00:47:01,238 --> 00:47:02,740
Playhouse.
886
00:47:03,373 --> 00:47:06,109
The wife dragged me to
one of those once. After five
887
00:47:06,243 --> 00:47:07,578
minutes they'd stop doing what
888
00:47:07,712 --> 00:47:09,346
they were
doin' and start singin'.
889
00:47:09,480 --> 00:47:11,248
I said that's
not normal behavior.
890
00:47:11,381 --> 00:47:12,649
She said is it supposed to be?
891
00:47:12,784 --> 00:47:15,152
I said then
what the hell am I watchin'?
892
00:47:16,253 --> 00:47:19,990
It's not just a play, it's art.
893
00:47:20,123 --> 00:47:21,992
And when it works when the
894
00:47:22,125 --> 00:47:25,128
writing, and the
acting, and the directing...
895
00:47:27,164 --> 00:47:30,567
And the writing, and the acting,
and the directing, and the set
896
00:47:30,702 --> 00:47:33,237
design, and the props, and
the writing, when it all comes
897
00:47:33,370 --> 00:47:35,305
together,
it's better than movies.
898
00:47:35,439 --> 00:47:36,640
It's better than TV.
899
00:47:36,774 --> 00:47:38,408
Can I get it on my phone?
900
00:47:38,542 --> 00:47:40,377
No.
901
00:47:49,486 --> 00:47:51,723
Okay, okay. Oh!
902
00:47:53,290 --> 00:47:55,259
Here we go.
903
00:48:03,001 --> 00:48:04,802
So?
904
00:48:04,936 --> 00:48:07,604
Yes. Do you have a...?
905
00:48:07,739 --> 00:48:09,306
Yeah, yes.
906
00:48:13,811 --> 00:48:15,546
Take your time.
907
00:48:16,881 --> 00:48:17,849
Hi!
908
00:48:17,982 --> 00:48:18,917
Hey.
909
00:48:19,049 --> 00:48:20,818
Merry Christmas.
910
00:48:20,952 --> 00:48:23,220
Merry Christmas.
911
00:48:23,353 --> 00:48:24,923
He didn't say anything, did he?
912
00:48:25,055 --> 00:48:26,691
Not about your play.
913
00:48:27,959 --> 00:48:29,226
He's reading my play.
914
00:48:29,359 --> 00:48:31,328
It got singin' in it?
915
00:48:31,461 --> 00:48:34,531
No. Does he look bored to you?
916
00:48:35,165 --> 00:48:37,267
Don't worry about me, I can
take it. I'm used to criticism.
917
00:48:37,401 --> 00:48:39,303
We criticize each other
in the theatre all the time.
918
00:48:39,436 --> 00:48:40,537
That's how we grow.
919
00:48:42,272 --> 00:48:42,941
See ya tomorrow.
920
00:48:43,106 --> 00:48:45,342
See ya tomorrow.
921
00:49:40,197 --> 00:49:41,766
Would you like some coffee?
922
00:49:41,899 --> 00:49:43,300
Something to eat?
923
00:49:43,433 --> 00:49:44,601
I can run out and get
you something real quick,
924
00:49:44,736 --> 00:49:45,837
if you'd like?
925
00:49:45,970 --> 00:49:47,105
I know what
you can do, pay for my ticket.
926
00:49:47,237 --> 00:49:48,271
After we discuss my play.
927
00:49:48,405 --> 00:49:49,539
Play? What play?
928
00:49:49,674 --> 00:49:51,375
I read so many,
it's hard to keep track.
929
00:49:52,043 --> 00:49:54,511
Well, just so you know,
I've never done this before.
930
00:49:54,645 --> 00:49:56,814
That's not to say you can't
be brutally honest with me.
931
00:49:56,948 --> 00:49:58,548
Don't worry about me,
I'm my own worst critic,
932
00:49:58,683 --> 00:49:59,984
so anything you could say I've
933
00:50:00,118 --> 00:50:00,852
probably
already said it to myself.
934
00:50:01,986 --> 00:50:03,387
So that being said,
say anything that comes to mind.
935
00:50:03,520 --> 00:50:05,823
Also, this is my first play.
936
00:50:05,957 --> 00:50:06,958
You probably could tell though,
937
00:50:07,091 --> 00:50:08,592
but still, in case you couldn't.
938
00:50:09,526 --> 00:50:11,294
You couldn't, could you?
939
00:50:11,428 --> 00:50:12,764
Or could you?
940
00:50:12,897 --> 00:50:14,032
No, don't answer that.
941
00:50:14,164 --> 00:50:15,565
Also, I
know I have a lot to learn.
942
00:50:15,700 --> 00:50:16,901
And even though
I've never had my
943
00:50:17,035 --> 00:50:18,836
work analyzed by anyone,
944
00:50:19,003 --> 00:50:20,038
certainly by anyone
of your stature, though
945
00:50:21,005 --> 00:50:22,707
I did do a
small reading with some friends
946
00:50:22,840 --> 00:50:23,440
of mine and after we were
finished, they really didn't
947
00:50:24,742 --> 00:50:25,275
have anything constructive to
say except for this one actress
948
00:50:26,010 --> 00:50:26,443
who thought her character should
949
00:50:27,277 --> 00:50:27,679
have more lines,
but other than that.
950
00:50:27,979 --> 00:50:28,746
So...
951
00:50:29,681 --> 00:50:30,647
Oh, also if you
could start by telling me
952
00:50:30,782 --> 00:50:31,949
something you liked about it.
953
00:50:32,950 --> 00:50:34,284
It can be a line, a
character, a plot twist.
954
00:50:34,418 --> 00:50:35,720
Anything.
Anything at all.
955
00:50:35,853 --> 00:50:37,354
And then feel
free to tear it to shreds.
956
00:50:37,487 --> 00:50:40,290
Or not. Or whatever.
I'm talking too much.
957
00:50:40,424 --> 00:50:41,491
I'd much rather hear
what you have to say.
958
00:50:41,625 --> 00:50:43,493
Whenever you're ready.
959
00:50:44,561 --> 00:50:47,098
Have you
ever eaten in a restaurant?
960
00:50:47,230 --> 00:50:48,632
What?
961
00:50:49,466 --> 00:50:50,702
Have you ever eaten in...
962
00:50:50,835 --> 00:50:52,103
Yes, of course
I've eaten in a restaurant.
963
00:50:52,235 --> 00:50:53,137
Oh good.
964
00:50:54,371 --> 00:50:55,405
Well... oh... well, eating in
this restaurant, have you ever
965
00:50:56,140 --> 00:50:56,874
experienced someone spending the
966
00:50:57,909 --> 00:50:59,877
entire meal sampling
the food off your plate?
967
00:51:00,011 --> 00:51:01,112
Uh.
968
00:51:01,244 --> 00:51:02,212
Don't you hate that?
969
00:51:02,345 --> 00:51:03,848
My agent is the worst.
970
00:51:05,049 --> 00:51:06,818
I... I'll be sitting there,
minding my own business, next
971
00:51:06,951 --> 00:51:09,586
thing I know she's poking her
way through my pasta like she's
972
00:51:09,721 --> 00:51:11,321
heading some archaeological dig.
973
00:51:11,455 --> 00:51:12,556
What does...
974
00:51:13,390 --> 00:51:13,991
"Just a taste.
Just a little taste."
975
00:51:15,258 --> 00:51:17,061
Swear to God, there are people,
you put 'em in front of food,
976
00:51:17,195 --> 00:51:19,529
they turn into cattle.
977
00:51:19,664 --> 00:51:22,166
Grazing their
way around the table.
978
00:51:22,299 --> 00:51:23,266
Mr. Harris.
979
00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:24,869
A restaurant is not a pasture.
980
00:51:25,002 --> 00:51:25,937
God, how I hate that.
981
00:51:26,070 --> 00:51:27,038
Don't you hate that?
982
00:51:27,171 --> 00:51:28,039
Tell me you hate that.
983
00:51:28,172 --> 00:51:29,707
I hate that.
984
00:51:29,841 --> 00:51:30,775
Good.
985
00:51:31,876 --> 00:51:33,310
'Cause as much as
I hate that, it's not nearly as
986
00:51:33,443 --> 00:51:35,278
much as I hated your play.
987
00:51:46,289 --> 00:51:50,928
Yes, hate. I tried to find
something more palatable.
988
00:51:51,829 --> 00:51:55,398
Loathe, despise,
989
00:51:55,532 --> 00:51:57,334
abhor, condemn.
990
00:51:57,467 --> 00:51:58,703
I condemn your play.
991
00:51:58,836 --> 00:52:01,638
But no, in the
end "hate" will have to do.
992
00:52:06,077 --> 00:52:08,212
This, of course,
would be where, in an effort to
993
00:52:08,345 --> 00:52:13,316
extricate us both from a...
an awkward situation, I say,
994
00:52:13,450 --> 00:52:15,753
"Perhaps, I'm being too harsh."
995
00:52:16,586 --> 00:52:18,555
But I don't.
996
00:52:19,289 --> 00:52:21,324
Instead, I turn to you and say,
997
00:52:21,458 --> 00:52:23,393
"Pay for my ticket."
998
00:52:26,596 --> 00:52:30,201
Oh, when you um, hmm... yeah,
999
00:52:30,333 --> 00:52:32,435
well, when...
when you say "hate"...
1000
00:52:33,336 --> 00:52:35,139
Oh God, he wants... wants more.
1001
00:52:35,273 --> 00:52:36,240
Write this down.
1002
00:52:36,373 --> 00:52:37,541
I think I'll remember this.
1003
00:52:37,675 --> 00:52:38,776
I can't hear you.
1004
00:52:39,643 --> 00:52:40,211
I said, I
think I'll remember this.
1005
00:52:41,245 --> 00:52:45,082
In your play.
I cannot hear you in your play.
1006
00:52:45,216 --> 00:52:46,117
Oh, I thought you were...
1007
00:52:46,250 --> 00:52:47,517
For whom are you writing?
1008
00:52:48,351 --> 00:52:49,452
What do you mean?
1009
00:52:49,586 --> 00:52:51,521
For whom are you writing?
1010
00:52:53,124 --> 00:52:54,357
The audience?
1011
00:52:54,491 --> 00:52:55,525
To hell with the audience.
1012
00:52:56,093 --> 00:52:58,062
You put your
little fingers on your
1013
00:52:58,196 --> 00:52:59,730
little keyboard and
you start typing what you
1014
00:52:59,864 --> 00:53:03,600
think, what you
feel, what you want,
1015
00:53:04,302 --> 00:53:05,870
what you love, what you hate,
1016
00:53:06,436 --> 00:53:07,571
what you cannot stand,
1017
00:53:07,705 --> 00:53:09,006
what you refuse to allow,
1018
00:53:09,140 --> 00:53:10,041
what you must change,
1019
00:53:10,174 --> 00:53:11,108
because if you do that,
1020
00:53:11,242 --> 00:53:12,743
you will write who you are.
1021
00:53:13,711 --> 00:53:16,047
That said, you are
the last thing I care about.
1022
00:53:16,180 --> 00:53:17,815
You care about the story.
1023
00:53:17,949 --> 00:53:19,050
Not the story.
1024
00:53:19,183 --> 00:53:20,450
The theme?
1025
00:53:20,584 --> 00:53:21,618
Stop being so academic.
1026
00:53:21,752 --> 00:53:22,920
When the curtain goes up,
1027
00:53:23,955 --> 00:53:26,556
I care about one
thing and one thing only. Me.
1028
00:53:26,691 --> 00:53:28,993
When I'm not
talking about myself,
1029
00:53:29,126 --> 00:53:30,560
I'm thinking about myself.
1030
00:53:30,695 --> 00:53:33,597
Therefore, it would
stand to reason that the only
1031
00:53:33,731 --> 00:53:36,433
person I would want
to know more about would be...
1032
00:53:38,002 --> 00:53:39,103
You.
1033
00:53:39,237 --> 00:53:40,470
Through you.
1034
00:53:40,604 --> 00:53:42,106
Through your play.
1035
00:53:42,639 --> 00:53:45,142
In order to do that,
I have to hear you.
1036
00:53:45,843 --> 00:53:49,146
If as I'm reading your
words, I can hear your voice,
1037
00:53:49,280 --> 00:53:51,182
I will in turn hear mine.
1038
00:53:51,749 --> 00:53:55,987
And when I hear mine,
in concert with yours, you will
1039
00:53:56,120 --> 00:53:59,357
take me to a place that's deep,
some place I may not want to go,
1040
00:53:59,489 --> 00:54:01,325
some place I
may not want to leave.
1041
00:54:01,993 --> 00:54:07,064
And if we're both very,
very lucky, you will have taken
1042
00:54:07,198 --> 00:54:09,033
me some place,
1043
00:54:09,934 --> 00:54:13,004
the only
place worth writing about.
1044
00:54:14,338 --> 00:54:16,774
A place called "human".
1045
00:54:17,975 --> 00:54:22,612
When you write
that, then and only then,
1046
00:54:22,747 --> 00:54:24,348
will you have a play.
1047
00:54:24,949 --> 00:54:28,152
And for God's
sakes, change the title,
1048
00:54:28,286 --> 00:54:30,154
critics will have a field day.
1049
00:54:36,526 --> 00:54:40,998
I'd like
to pay for my ticket.
1050
00:54:46,837 --> 00:54:50,675
Don't be so hard on
yourself, it's your first play.
1051
00:54:52,209 --> 00:54:56,479
Worse, it's the first
draft of your first play.
1052
00:54:56,613 --> 00:54:58,382
You're not
even out of the womb yet.
1053
00:54:58,515 --> 00:54:59,616
Cash or charge?
1054
00:54:59,750 --> 00:55:00,985
Mr. Waters?
1055
00:55:01,986 --> 00:55:05,156
Your presence is requested.
1056
00:55:09,694 --> 00:55:12,562
Mr. Waters,
I need your credit card.
1057
00:55:14,198 --> 00:55:16,734
I am an artist
and this is my art.
1058
00:55:21,038 --> 00:55:23,107
I am an
artist and this is my art.
1059
00:55:23,240 --> 00:55:25,376
Oh, for God's sake.
1060
00:55:25,910 --> 00:55:27,912
I am an artist
and this is my art.
1061
00:55:28,045 --> 00:55:29,612
I'm not in the mood for this.
1062
00:55:29,747 --> 00:55:31,048
I am an artist
and this is my art!
1063
00:55:31,182 --> 00:55:32,817
Mr. Waters,
we have an agreement.
1064
00:55:32,950 --> 00:55:35,152
I am an artist
and this is my art!
1065
00:55:35,286 --> 00:55:36,187
Waters.
1066
00:55:36,988 --> 00:55:37,822
I am an artist
and this is my art!
1067
00:55:38,621 --> 00:55:40,358
I am an artist
and this is my art!
1068
00:55:40,490 --> 00:55:41,392
I... I...
1069
00:55:42,193 --> 00:55:43,260
I am an artist
and this is my art!
1070
00:55:44,061 --> 00:55:44,795
I am an artist
and this is my art!
1071
00:55:45,528 --> 00:55:46,731
Waters, I need your credit card.
1072
00:55:46,864 --> 00:55:48,631
I am an artist
and this is my art!
1073
00:55:48,766 --> 00:55:50,401
Get off my pew!
1074
00:55:50,533 --> 00:55:52,169
I am an artist
and this is my art!
1075
00:55:52,303 --> 00:55:54,005
Get the hell off
my pews or I'm callin' the cops!
1076
00:55:54,138 --> 00:55:55,006
Get off!
1077
00:55:55,139 --> 00:55:57,775
Yeah, okay, okay.
1078
00:55:58,409 --> 00:56:00,144
I gave you a
beer, so unless you want me to
1079
00:56:00,277 --> 00:56:02,512
call the train people and tell
them you drink on the job...
1080
00:56:16,660 --> 00:56:18,628
I got a couple questions!
1081
00:56:19,596 --> 00:56:20,831
Do you?
1082
00:56:20,965 --> 00:56:22,033
Mhmm.
1083
00:56:22,166 --> 00:56:23,134
About?
1084
00:56:23,267 --> 00:56:24,268
All sorts of things.
1085
00:56:24,402 --> 00:56:25,336
Where do I start?
1086
00:56:25,469 --> 00:56:26,871
Well, you could start by telling
1087
00:56:27,004 --> 00:56:29,173
me why you're not
honoring our agreement.
1088
00:56:29,306 --> 00:56:30,708
Oh, I'm going to honor it!
1089
00:56:30,841 --> 00:56:31,909
I may not be able to write,
1090
00:56:32,043 --> 00:56:33,511
but honorable? That I can do!
1091
00:56:34,011 --> 00:56:35,513
I read your play, didn't I?
1092
00:56:35,645 --> 00:56:36,514
Yes, you did!
1093
00:56:36,646 --> 00:56:37,515
And we discussed it.
1094
00:56:37,647 --> 00:56:38,615
Yes, we did!
1095
00:56:38,749 --> 00:56:40,284
So what is it I haven't done?
1096
00:56:40,418 --> 00:56:42,820
Why haven't you written
anything in almost 20 years?
1097
00:56:44,955 --> 00:56:46,457
Pay for my ticket.
1098
00:56:46,589 --> 00:56:48,959
Is it because you're a drunk?
1099
00:56:53,064 --> 00:56:57,902
"Look! Look, I'm Joseph Harris!
1100
00:56:58,035 --> 00:57:00,603
I think I'll sit down
and not write a play!
1101
00:57:00,738 --> 00:57:04,508
Do you care to
join me, Mr. Waters? Yes? No?
1102
00:57:04,675 --> 00:57:06,110
All the more for me.
1103
00:57:06,243 --> 00:57:09,547
I love being me.
You should be so lucky."
1104
00:57:10,647 --> 00:57:14,318
Do you know what's worse than
meeting your inspiration? Huh?
1105
00:57:14,452 --> 00:57:18,122
Coming face to face with
your muse. That's right, Harris.
1106
00:57:18,255 --> 00:57:21,192
I have a muse,
right here in my bag.
1107
00:57:25,496 --> 00:57:28,598
You! You are my muse!
1108
00:57:28,732 --> 00:57:30,901
Not some little bird
who sits on my shoulder!
1109
00:57:31,035 --> 00:57:34,138
You! I know I'm
supposed to have my own voice,
1110
00:57:34,271 --> 00:57:36,240
and truth,
and soul, but I don't.
1111
00:57:36,373 --> 00:57:38,542
I'm not a playwright
and I never will be.
1112
00:57:38,676 --> 00:57:39,642
Tell me the truth!
1113
00:57:39,777 --> 00:57:41,078
Tell me I'm not a playwright!
1114
00:57:45,416 --> 00:57:47,818
Do you want me to fix it?
1115
00:57:50,821 --> 00:57:52,156
What, you're just gonna sit here
1116
00:57:52,289 --> 00:57:53,924
and work some
kind of a miracle, is that it?
1117
00:57:54,592 --> 00:57:56,393
Something like that.
1118
00:57:57,928 --> 00:58:00,397
Pay for my
ticket, I'll fix your play.
1119
00:58:01,765 --> 00:58:03,901
Fix my play and
I'll pay for your ticket.
1120
00:58:06,537 --> 00:58:08,139
Do you have a pen?
1121
00:58:10,374 --> 00:58:14,378
Uh.
I think a lot of what's wrong
1122
00:58:14,512 --> 00:58:15,645
with it is in the Second Act.
1123
00:58:15,779 --> 00:58:17,248
Not that
the First Act is so great, but I
1124
00:58:17,381 --> 00:58:19,049
ran into problems with the
subplot about the brother.
1125
00:58:19,683 --> 00:58:20,951
I just don't know if he's that
1126
00:58:21,085 --> 00:58:21,986
interesting of
a character, to be honest.
1127
00:58:22,119 --> 00:58:23,154
I like the sister, though.
1128
00:58:24,355 --> 00:58:25,089
She's modeled after my own
sister who's this certifiable
1129
00:58:26,290 --> 00:58:27,224
maniac which is why anytime
she opens her mouth, she...
1130
00:58:27,358 --> 00:58:28,826
Done.
1131
00:58:29,627 --> 00:58:31,095
You can't do that.
1132
00:58:31,228 --> 00:58:33,464
Great American
Play by Joseph Harris.
1133
00:58:33,597 --> 00:58:35,266
Some judicious trimming,
1134
00:58:35,399 --> 00:58:37,334
I'm sure it
will be to Simon's liking.
1135
00:58:38,335 --> 00:58:39,637
No.
1136
00:58:39,770 --> 00:58:40,671
You want to be a playwright?
1137
00:58:40,804 --> 00:58:42,339
You're a playwright.
1138
00:58:42,473 --> 00:58:43,641
Not like this.
1139
00:58:44,175 --> 00:58:46,410
Haven't you
heard of collaboration?
1140
00:58:46,544 --> 00:58:48,379
It's the new rage.
1141
00:58:48,946 --> 00:58:50,614
Simon's
gonna wanna know where you are.
1142
00:58:50,748 --> 00:58:53,117
I'll be in New York.
1143
00:58:53,951 --> 00:58:55,753
He's going to
want to talk to you.
1144
00:58:55,886 --> 00:58:57,154
He's going to
want to discuss the play.
1145
00:58:58,422 --> 00:59:01,660
I'm nothing if not eccentric and
my latest eccentricity is that I
1146
00:59:01,792 --> 00:59:04,828
refuse to discuss my play
with anyone other than you.
1147
00:59:04,962 --> 00:59:06,330
Uh, he won't buy that.
1148
00:59:07,231 --> 00:59:09,833
I'll tell him we
have great chemistry.
1149
00:59:09,967 --> 00:59:11,435
He'll know it's not yours.
1150
00:59:11,569 --> 00:59:13,470
He hasn't read it, has he?
1151
00:59:13,604 --> 00:59:14,673
No.
1152
00:59:14,805 --> 00:59:17,174
Ah, perfect. Signed a contract
1153
00:59:17,308 --> 00:59:20,578
for a new play, no one
said it had to be any good.
1154
00:59:21,111 --> 00:59:22,880
But it's not even
in your style, your voice.
1155
00:59:23,013 --> 00:59:24,982
Don't be afraid, Mr. Waters.
1156
00:59:25,449 --> 00:59:29,620
You're about to become the
luckiest apprentice in the
1157
00:59:29,753 --> 00:59:32,156
history of the American Theatre.
1158
00:59:35,993 --> 00:59:37,928
You still
didn't answer my question.
1159
00:59:40,965 --> 00:59:45,769
Yes. I'm a drunk.
1160
00:59:54,278 --> 00:59:56,780
Is that why you
want to kill yourself?
1161
01:00:12,896 --> 01:00:17,768
I am the way I am, because
it makes everything the same.
1162
01:00:20,004 --> 01:00:23,274
Exactly as it should be, exactly
1163
01:00:23,407 --> 01:00:27,911
as it was, and always will be
which is exactly how we like it.
1164
01:00:29,613 --> 01:00:31,148
Isn't it?
1165
01:00:33,083 --> 01:00:34,485
If you say so.
1166
01:00:34,618 --> 01:00:36,020
Oh, I know so.
1167
01:00:36,553 --> 01:00:39,556
Save us all from the
one thing that we don't want to
1168
01:00:39,691 --> 01:00:41,258
face which is what, Mr. Waters?
1169
01:00:41,392 --> 01:00:45,796
What is that thing inside you,
that thing your play lacks?
1170
01:00:47,898 --> 01:00:49,867
The truth?
1171
01:00:50,000 --> 01:00:53,871
Define truth.
1172
01:00:54,004 --> 01:00:55,906
Feeling more
than we want to?
1173
01:00:56,807 --> 01:01:00,811
Feeling all of it.
Every heartache,
1174
01:01:00,944 --> 01:01:04,315
every triumph,
1175
01:01:06,016 --> 01:01:08,319
right, wrong,
1176
01:01:08,452 --> 01:01:09,987
hope, and dream.
1177
01:01:10,120 --> 01:01:14,024
Love and loss.
1178
01:01:15,794 --> 01:01:19,196
All I know, all I don't,
1179
01:01:20,631 --> 01:01:23,233
all I am, and all I am not.
1180
01:01:29,106 --> 01:01:32,744
The 4:19 to Toledo
will be arriving shortly.
1181
01:01:32,876 --> 01:01:35,245
Please be
careful near the tracks.
1182
01:02:21,258 --> 01:02:24,027
Ah, mornin', Franz.
1183
01:02:24,161 --> 01:02:25,329
Mornin', Mary.
1184
01:02:25,462 --> 01:02:26,463
Merry Christmas.
1185
01:02:26,597 --> 01:02:27,766
How's your sister?
1186
01:02:29,066 --> 01:02:32,603
Uh, well, between you and me,
if she'd just get it over with.
1187
01:02:32,737 --> 01:02:34,505
I got coffee made.
1188
01:02:34,638 --> 01:02:37,074
Oh no, no. No
thanks, I'm fine.
1189
01:02:48,385 --> 01:02:50,154
Hello.
1190
01:02:50,921 --> 01:02:52,757
Hello.
1191
01:02:53,223 --> 01:02:55,626
You going to Toledo?
1192
01:02:56,627 --> 01:02:59,096
No.
1193
01:02:59,764 --> 01:03:01,733
I'm gonna see my sister.
1194
01:03:02,232 --> 01:03:03,934
She's dying of cancer.
1195
01:03:04,067 --> 01:03:06,303
It's very sad.
1196
01:03:12,209 --> 01:03:15,512
I'm not sorry.
1197
01:03:22,286 --> 01:03:24,488
Neither am I.
1198
01:03:25,355 --> 01:03:27,491
You want the ticket or not?
1199
01:03:55,720 --> 01:03:58,522
One last question.
1200
01:04:03,962 --> 01:04:06,997
Can you still think?
1201
01:04:11,001 --> 01:04:12,503
Answer the question.
1202
01:04:13,103 --> 01:04:15,539
It's not important.
1203
01:04:18,642 --> 01:04:21,445
You've never said anything
unimportant in your life.
1204
01:04:34,659 --> 01:04:37,261
"There comes a time in
the life of every playwright
1205
01:04:37,996 --> 01:04:40,597
when you realize
you've written your great play.
1206
01:04:41,164 --> 01:04:42,734
I've written mine.
1207
01:04:44,002 --> 01:04:45,602
My fear is Up a Lonely River may
not only be the best play I have
1208
01:04:45,737 --> 01:04:48,205
ever written, but it
is quite possibly the best play
1209
01:04:48,338 --> 01:04:49,406
I will ever write.
1210
01:04:50,407 --> 01:04:52,509
Knowing this
is frightening enough, but one's
1211
01:04:52,643 --> 01:04:55,178
only hope of overcoming the
daunting prospect of never being
1212
01:04:55,312 --> 01:04:57,682
able to live up to yourself is
1213
01:04:57,815 --> 01:04:59,249
to sit down at
your desk every morning,
1214
01:04:59,383 --> 01:05:01,118
put your fingers on the keys,
1215
01:05:01,251 --> 01:05:02,553
and type what you think.
1216
01:05:02,687 --> 01:05:05,055
For it matters
not what I have done,
1217
01:05:05,188 --> 01:05:06,991
only what I still have to say
1218
01:05:07,558 --> 01:05:10,227
and there is always
something still to say, because
1219
01:05:10,360 --> 01:05:13,731
as long as I can still
think, I will still write."
1220
01:05:20,337 --> 01:05:22,239
Can you still think?
1221
01:05:47,531 --> 01:05:49,667
All this
time, it didn't make any sense.
1222
01:05:50,167 --> 01:05:53,905
Why would he come all this way
just to return a check for a
1223
01:05:54,038 --> 01:05:55,505
play he never wrote?
1224
01:06:05,515 --> 01:06:08,585
"Untitled New
Play By Joseph Harris."
1225
01:06:13,624 --> 01:06:15,727
Out of
all the possible titles.
1226
01:06:20,197 --> 01:06:21,766
When?
1227
01:06:21,899 --> 01:06:22,967
No, it doesn't matter.
1228
01:06:24,102 --> 01:06:26,904
Oh, it matters, Mr. Waters.
It matters a great deal.
1229
01:06:28,572 --> 01:06:30,173
When you
got on the train to come here.
1230
01:06:30,307 --> 01:06:33,111
You said it yourself, "No one
comes to a place like this
1231
01:06:33,243 --> 01:06:34,645
unless they have to."
1232
01:06:39,483 --> 01:06:41,686
I ran into the street.
1233
01:06:43,688 --> 01:06:47,759
Everyone was pouring out
of the stores, their apartments.
1234
01:06:48,625 --> 01:06:52,130
What was going on?
No one knew a thing.
1235
01:06:52,997 --> 01:06:56,834
A queen on the fourth
floor of a walk up was hanging
1236
01:06:56,968 --> 01:06:59,236
out his window, calling down to
1237
01:06:59,369 --> 01:07:01,571
us about what he
was seeing on television.
1238
01:07:02,172 --> 01:07:07,377
A woman in high heels ran
past me, through me actually,
1239
01:07:07,577 --> 01:07:10,213
screaming into
her cell phone about having
1240
01:07:10,347 --> 01:07:14,686
to get to her daughter's school
all the way up in the East 90s.
1241
01:07:15,218 --> 01:07:20,091
I stepped... I stepped out onto
1242
01:07:20,223 --> 01:07:22,026
7th Avenue and looked south.
1243
01:07:22,592 --> 01:07:24,662
I could see the smoke.
1244
01:07:24,796 --> 01:07:26,064
And the fire.
1245
01:07:26,630 --> 01:07:28,298
And then came the second plane.
1246
01:07:28,432 --> 01:07:30,134
Over the water.
1247
01:07:30,735 --> 01:07:34,038
So low I could see that
brilliant September sun
1248
01:07:34,172 --> 01:07:35,973
reflecting off the fuselage.
1249
01:07:36,506 --> 01:07:38,176
I watched it rumble northward,
1250
01:07:38,308 --> 01:07:41,611
as if pulled by a string
until that guided suicidal roar
1251
01:07:41,746 --> 01:07:43,513
exploded into a giant orange
1252
01:07:43,647 --> 01:07:46,216
ball and then a cloud
of the blackest smoke and
1253
01:07:46,349 --> 01:07:48,452
I swear the ground
underneath me shuddered.
1254
01:07:48,585 --> 01:07:50,387
The queen was
shrieking now, 'We're...'"
1255
01:07:50,520 --> 01:07:53,057
HARRIS AND KEnNETH: "'We're under attack.
We're under attack.'"
1256
01:07:53,791 --> 01:07:55,525
And the streets were filled with
1257
01:07:55,660 --> 01:07:57,227
people, all
coming from everywhere
1258
01:07:57,360 --> 01:07:58,495
"Everywhere and nowhere.
1259
01:07:58,628 --> 01:08:01,231
Asking the same
question, over and over.
1260
01:08:01,364 --> 01:08:04,702
'Why?' 'Why?'
1261
01:08:06,671 --> 01:08:09,506
'Why?'
1262
01:08:10,141 --> 01:08:14,812
And I stood there thinking
1263
01:08:17,414 --> 01:08:20,550
this
may be the best thing that had
1264
01:08:20,685 --> 01:08:25,422
ever happened to this fat,
arrogant excuse for a country."
1265
01:08:28,325 --> 01:08:30,527
And I started crying,
1266
01:08:31,095 --> 01:08:32,930
not for those poor people in
1267
01:08:33,064 --> 01:08:35,233
those planes,
in those buildings.
1268
01:08:35,365 --> 01:08:39,603
I started crying, because
I knew I had to write it.
1269
01:08:41,939 --> 01:08:45,342
I knew I had
to turn this... this... this
1270
01:08:45,475 --> 01:08:49,446
horrible, horrible day into art.
1271
01:08:55,519 --> 01:08:57,889
But you can't produce a play
1272
01:08:58,022 --> 01:09:01,759
about 9/11 that
says we deserved it.
1273
01:09:04,628 --> 01:09:07,031
So I threw it in a drawer.
1274
01:09:11,202 --> 01:09:13,004
Is it any good?
1275
01:09:16,540 --> 01:09:18,843
It's the best
thing I ever wrote.
1276
01:09:20,278 --> 01:09:21,813
And I hate every word of it.
1277
01:09:26,918 --> 01:09:28,786
Well,
1278
01:09:29,419 --> 01:09:31,454
with all
due respect, Mr. Harris,
1279
01:09:31,588 --> 01:09:33,456
you're the last
thing I care about.
1280
01:09:36,794 --> 01:09:39,362
You sound
like a playwright.
1281
01:09:41,999 --> 01:09:44,001
I am.
1282
01:09:57,114 --> 01:10:02,286
They say as soon as a playwright
writes "The End", the play is...
1283
01:10:02,419 --> 01:10:04,387
"The play is no
longer his. It's theirs.
1284
01:10:04,521 --> 01:10:05,555
To do with what they will."
1285
01:10:06,057 --> 01:10:09,492
American
Theater Magazine, January, 1991.
1286
01:10:15,199 --> 01:10:17,500
I don't have a title.
1287
01:10:18,035 --> 01:10:19,337
You can borrow mine!
1288
01:10:29,412 --> 01:10:31,883
Get out,
get out, get outta here.
1289
01:11:23,852 --> 01:11:27,452
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