All language subtitles for 800.Words.S02E13.Episode.13.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-KiNGS-eng

[ Up-tempo music plays ]

GEORGE:
Interruptions.

Things interrupted.

Things begun with the intention
of seeing them through

to the bitter end.

And then you never get there.

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

Twins.

Yep.
[ Sighs ]

What are you gonna do
if they´re yours?

Okay.

The first thing is, this has
nothing to do with you and I.

I´m not gonna go back to Jan,

if that´s what you´re
worried about.

Uh, no.
It´s not.

Jan has made it very clear

that she is gonna do this thing
on her own.

Big call from Jan.

Yeah.

-Hey.
-Hi.

ARLO:
Hey, Fiona.

Uh, we´ll get out of your way.

Uh, no. That´s okay.
I have to go anyway.

Got to go to work.

I´ll call you tomorrow.

I swear this doesn´t change
anything between you and me.

Yeah.
Got that.

Thank you.

-We can talk tomorrow.
-Yeah.

[ Door closes, engine starts ]

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

GEORGE:
Life is, some might argue,

a series of endeavors
upon which we embark

with the best of intentions
only to be interrupted...

Yes, Arlo?

Want me to take your plate?

Thanks.

That was great.
Thanks.

It was cheese on toast.

Sometimes that´s just
what you need.

Good night.

Good night, Arlo.

GEORGE: a series of endeavors
upon which we embark

with the best of intentions

only to be interrupted
by the cold, hard facts

of what we around here
loosely call reality.

Children.
I mean, I mean listen to me.

They are literally the future.
Literally.

SIOUXSIE:
Do you want a lift home or not?

Just be careful
what you name them.

I´ve done okay so far.

Any complaints?

Namewise, not so much.

Having a father who helped out
while I was growing up, mm...

That is the first thing I´m
gonna change this time around.

Except Jan wants nothing
to do with you.

SIOUXSIE:
Even if you are the father.

Man. Who knew Jan
was such a root rat?

She will fall
to the power of Zac.

Did you just refer to yourself
in the third person?

No.
I am the first person.

George is second,
and this Aussie bloke,

whoever he is, is way third.

Please forget I ever spoke.

Welcome to Fatherhood 101.

When we named Siouxsie

after Siouxsie
from Siouxsie and the Banshees,

we had absolutely no clue
that she would actually grow up

to be Siouxsie
from Siouxsie and the Banshees.

Your fault for choosing
such a bitchin´ role model.

At least you didn´t call
your kids Jared and...Lindsay.

What´s wrong with those names?

Nothing.
Uh, it´s just the kids, I guess.

No more alcohol
for these people.

So your boyfriend´s knocked up
another chick, then.

You okay with that?

ZAC:
I think you´ll find that was me.

And I´ll be seeing it through
this time,

whether she wants it or not.

We´re talking about it,
Robbie...

Or trying to... like adults.

Well, if they are George´s kids

and you guys somehow survive
the fallout,

then, um,
you´d make a great stepmum.

During the holidays
or whatever deal you figure out.

Is that right?

Yes, it is.

Because I know you, Fiona...

and I know you´d make
a great mum.

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

Bar closed.
Everybody go home.

-BILL JR.: Aw.
-SIOUXSIE: Come on.

[ Music continues ]

[ Cellphone ringing ]

[ Exhales deeply ]

Hello?

Sorry.
Who is this?

Denis, if you have a problem,
shouldn´t you call Katie?

Sorry.
What?

What plan B?

[ Birds chirping ]

Man, I was in such trouble
when I got home.

Lindsay is such a bad example.

Yeah. She´s kind of known
for that around here.

Hey, uh, what was that
that you wanted to ask me?

Before Lindsay rendered you
incapable of speech.

It... It doesn´t really matter.

Oh, come on. I´m curious.
What was it?

I was kind of wondering,
with us being in separate towns

and I don´t know when, like,

my mum is ever gonna let me
go back to Weld again...

Well, I can come to you
next time.

That´d be great.

But, you know, in between
when we see each other...

I was wondering if it would be
okay if we saw other people.

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

W-What?

You know... other people.

WOMAN:
Emma, get up here!

EMMA: Mum´s calling.
I have to go to school.

Whoa. Hang on.
Define "other people."

We´ll talk after, okay?

-GEORGE: Toast?
-Can´t.

Toast?

Um, I´m good.

-You got your lunch?
-Yeah, yeah. All good.

[ Cellphone ringing ]

-Good morning.
-FIONA: Hey.

How are things?

Oh, my toast is being rejected.

That´s terrible.

Yep.
Ungrateful children.

Yeah.

You working today?

I´m sure Gloria can hold
the fort.

So it´s okay if I come over?

Oh, I´m very sweaty right now.
About to jump in the shower.

You´re very welcome to join me.

I might give you a while,
bring coffee and pastries.

There´s toast
if you´re into toast.

See you soon.

Is this something
I should be worrying about,

this conversation
we´re trying to have?

I don´t know, George.

We haven´t had the conversation
yet.

Yeah.

Okay. So Denis wasn´t entirely
clear on anything.

But I think he´s agreed
to another show.

-As well as the Berlin one?
-Yeah.

He thought this guy was, like,
Russian mafia or something,

so he said yes

But it turned out
the guy was from Austria,

so now he´s got a show in Vienna
and he´s freaking out.

[ Sighs ]
I´m sure he is.

He kept saying "plan B."

Does that mean anything to you?

Okay. The thing is,
Denis has this belief.

And it makes no sense, but he
believes that he isn´t real.

Sorry?

He believes that he´s
a character,

therefore he doesn´t exist,

therefore everything he creates
also doesn´t exist.

But his paintings are real.

Not to him.

You know that Denis has a few
psychological issues, right?

Yeah.
I gathered as much.

So what is plan B?

So when his paintings
started to sell,

he was worried
that he was making money

selling things that weren´t real
to real people.

Mm-hmm.

So he came up with a plan

where I would paint
his paintings for him,

therefore making them real.

I think I need to talk to him.

[ Bell rings ]

Maybe she meant she wants to see
other people.

But why?
What we have is great.

Except she´s there,
and you´re here.

Why would she want to change
that?

At least if she gets to
play around, so do you.

[ Mid-tempo music plays ]

What?

Nothing.

It´s like she´s giving you
a license to hunt, like a lion.

Excellent pastries.

Better than the toast option?

There´s always a time
and a place for toast.

You heard from Jan?

Since we last spoke?
No.

You know what I said yesterday
still applies, don´t you?

I´m with you, not her.

Even if they are your kids?

Then I will deal with that
on that basis with Jan.

And even if they are mine,

Jan is not gonna want me to go
and set up house with her.

Neither of us want that.

-WOODY: Only me!
-Woody.

G´day George. Fiona.

-Woody.
-I wasn´t expecting you today.

Yeah. Well, it´s funny how life
turns out sometimes, eh?

I thought I´d better finish
jibbing young Arlo´s room,

get it all lined
before the cold sets in.

Take care
of that next generation, eh?

-[ Nail gun whirs ]
-[ Laughs ]

You won´t even know I´m here.

[ Chuckles ]

You get used to it.

I can imagine.

So, if Jan´s twins,
it turns out, I´m the father of,

then arrangements
will be made...

Financial, whatever.

But I´m not going back
to Sydney.

But there will still be
an emotional attachment.

I guess, but...

It´s weird.

I haven´t thought about that
till now.

Yes, they will be my kids,
but...

But also they won´t,
because they´ll be Jan´s kids.

[ Hammer tapping in distance ]

Does that sound callous?

No.

No.

I get it.

Is this a problem for us?

WOODY:
♫ Ooh, ooh ♫

-Yeah! Come on!
-[ Nail gun whirring ]

♫ Girl, I´ve seen ♫

-♫ So many like you ♫
-[ Nail gun whirs ]

-Woody?
-Hey!

You know what you said, that
we wouldn´t know you´re here?

-Yeah.
-It´s not working out that way.

-Oh, sorry. Am I disturbing you?
-A little bit, yeah.

Oh, right. You having a bit
of a discussion?

Yes, actually.

Yeah. Let me guess.
It´s about having kids.

It´s shaping up that way, yes.

You´ve started something there,
George.

-Me?
-Well, yeah.

Suddenly all the women of Weld
want to talk about having kids.

How would you feel
if I got pregnant?

And the thing is,
as far as conversations go,

that´s a loaded gun, my friend.

Oh, no.
I´m not actually pregnant.

I´m just saying, you know.
Like, what if?

You know,
how would that change things?

What would that mean
for our lives?

Obviously it´d be huge
in terms of my job,

but we could deal with that,
right?

Right?

This is a conversation where
you don´t have to say anything

and you´ve landed yourself
right in it.

Are you gonna say anything?

Uh, do I have to?

Yes,
because it would be nice to know

where you stand on the issue.

Can I think about it?

Okay.

You do that.

Good night.

Yeah.
Night.

WOODY:
What if Tracey gets pregnant,

not because she wants to,
but because she hates her job?

What way to conceive a kid
is that?

It´s the wrong way, mate.

And the kid comes along.
She doesn´t have a job.

She´ll be happy.
What about me?

I´m the breadwinner, but what
if I don´t win any bread?

-Woody...
-There´s just so many thoughts.

-They just kept coming at me.
-Woody...

Just thought after thought
after thought!

-Woody...
-No. They just...

-I have an idea.
-Do you? Brilliant.

´Cause ideas are what solve
thoughts.

You need to go surfing.
Talk to the dolphins.

I don´t want to get
one of those reputations

of builders
that are always out surfing.

Woody, there are times
in your life

where you need to put yourself
first.

You have a visitor.

-Zac.
-George.

Oh, you guys have probably got
father issues to talk about, eh?

Well, not issues with your
fathers but potential fathers...

Yep. Got it.
Thanks, Woody.

Yeah. Right. Sorry.
See ya.

-You and I need to talk.
-We do?

We need to present
a united front.

-Do we?
-With Jan.

I know we´re rivals,
but she needs to know,

whoever the father is,
fathers have rights, too.

Okay.

Gonna leave you to it.

ZAC:
We need to call Sydney.

We can pick up our thing later.

-I´m sorry about this.
-Later.

[ Mid-tempo music plays ]

Oh, you have rights, do you?

We think we do.

It takes two people
to make a baby, Jan.

Yes. Thanks, Zac.
I´m aware of that.

Unfortunately, it takes only one
to incubate it...

Or them, fighting all night,
keeping me awake.

That´s what we want to help with
if you just give us a chance.

What, both of you?

No. That would be weird.
The father should be there...

But I don´t know
who the father is!

Taylor-Rose,
don´t give me that look.

Sorry.

I think you do, deep down.

Deep down, all I am
is hungry all the time.

You know what?

Stop standing there judging me
and get me some dumplings.

And, Zac, yes, you are correct.

You do have rights.

Okay.
Good.

The right to remain silent.

[ Computer beeps ]

I think we caught her
on a bad day.

No. No. T-That was good.
We... We got our message across.

I´m glad you think so.

And by the looks of it,
it won´t be too long

before she realizes she´s gonna
need someone beside her to...

to help her through.

You´d put your hand up for that?

Wouldn´t you?

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

[ Exhales deeply ]
Sorry. That took a while.

But basically, yes...

Denis has committed
to two shows.

That´s a ridiculous number
of works

that he hasn´t got a hope
in hell of getting done.

Unless plan B, which is
that you paint some of them.

That´s his genius solution.

And can you actually
pull that off?

One is an actual Denis,

and the other one
is one I painted for him.

His, yours.

Well, that answers that.

If you can tell the real
from the fake,

then no, I can´t pull it off.

That one is signed.
That one isn´t.

Oh, yeah.
[ Laughs ]

Otherwise...

Can I have a go?

-At what?
-Painting a Denis.

I reckon I could do
an awesome Denis.

No. No one is painting a Denis
except Denis.

But then how is he gonna put on
the shows?

By bloody well painting them
himself.

You said he doesn´t have
a hope of that.

Then he can man up
and tell them.

But Denis has
psychological issues.

It could scar him for life.

Plan B, Katie.

No, we are not painting
his paintings for him.

What´s stopping us?

We have his permission,

and this sort of stuff happens
all the time in the art world.

You know that.

Andy Warhol. Damien Hirst.
There´s that Japanese guy.

Takashi Murakami.

See? You know exactly
what I´m talking about.

Those guys
had heaps of assistants

turning out works for them.

Come on, Katie.
Let´s do it.

It´ll be fun,

and we´ll be helping Denis
out of a jam too, right?

Hey, I´ve been thinking.

That´s a good thing.

Emma... What if she´s testing me

to see if I´m fully committed
to our relationship?

The one where you´re here
and she´s in Stafford.

The one that requires
commitment.

What?

Nothing.

You´re probably
just such a babe magnet

she´s just feeling insecure.

Exactly.

Also women are way more cunning
than men.

Exactly.

[ Cellphone ringing ]

GEORGE:
Hi. It´s me.

Just saying the coast is clear,
for the moment, anyway,

so, um, call me.

[ Up-tempo music playing ]

You have a gift for Denis.

Finally I´m good at something,
and it´s for being someone else.

That´s not true,
and you know it.

Do we have to have the music?
It really sucks.

Denis says it´s important
for his creative state of mind.

Denis also says
he doesn´t exist.

True.

-[ Music stops ]
-Hey.

Hey. Pull up a canvas.
Have a go.

Have a go at what?

Being Denis.

Oh.
Famous painter Denis?

The artist formerly known
as our bus driver.

Oh.

Why would I do that?

Long story short... We´re doing
the grunt work for him

so that he can put on
a couple of shows in Europe.

By grunt work, you mean, like...
Like what, painting for him?

Yeah.
It´s fun.

Yeah, but isn´t that also fraud?

No.
He asked us to do it.

And he´ll sign them
when he gets them.

Oh.
Isn´t that still fraud?

Come with me just a second?

Okay.
Stop using the "F" word.

But that´s what it is, isn´t it?

No.
And you´re freaking out Katie.

When some rich German dude buys
a Denis painting you painted,

I think it is.

When it´s signed by Denis,
it is a Denis.

Except Shay painted it.

It doesn´t matter as long
as his signature´s on it.

I pretty sure it´ll matter to
the German dude if he found out.

Ike, this isn´t unusual
in the art world.

Warhol, Damien Hirst...

I don´t care
what those old guys did.

I don´t want you doing it.

Sorry?
You don´t want me doing it?

Since when do you own me?

I-I don´t like you doing it.

Well, I do.
It´s fun.

I thought we were having fun
torturing Sean from the council

with the mural thing, but...

Yeah, but that doesn´t pay.

Katie says I´ll get
half the commission

on each painting we sell.

On each fraud you commit.

Hey, who appointed you
my moral guardian?

I´m just saying I think
what you´re doing is wrong.

Yeah.
I got that, loud and clear.

If you´re gonna keep doing it,
then I don´t want to be around.

Yeah. Well, good news is,
you don´t have to be.

[ Engine starts ]

[ Door closes ]

-Maybe he´s right.
-He is not right.

We have the permission
of the artist.

[ Music resumes ]

Ike has a stick up his butt.
That is all.

[ Vacuum cleaner humming ]

I tried calling you.

Yeah.
I got your message.

-[ Vacuum stops ]
-How´d it go with Zac?

He´s very sure he´s the father.

Well, that´s just how Zac rolls.

But if you´re worried,
should it turn out to be me,

-that I´m suddenly gonna rush...
-No, no. Totally got that.

Have you?

Because it still seems
there´s a problem here.

Yes, it was irresponsible,
or at least accidental,

of me to get into
this situation.

This isn´t about
birth-control issues.

It happens. I wouldn´t hold that
against you.

Well, I´m not sure
what else I can say

to make whatever it is better.

-Well...
-TRACEY: Excuse me.

-Hi, Tracey.
-Sorry, but is Woody here?

Uh, he was here this morning.

TRACEY: I´ve been trying to
call him all day,

and it just goes straight
to his stupid message.

"Hi.
This is Woody.

Just ´cause I´m not here
doesn´t mean I can´t hear you."

-I think he went surfing.
-That would explain it.

ARLO: Wait.
Have I done something wrong?

Have you?

Well, um, not since the weekend,

but I thought
we dealt with that.

Oh, I´m here looking for Woody.

Oh.

Hey, I´m... I´m gonna leave
you guys to this.

We´re not having much luck
with this, are we?

No, we´re not.

Well, we´re alone now.

Is it something you can say
here and now?

No.
Not really.

Time to discuss things.

That´s what I´d like.

We can try again later.

Yeah.
We can do that.

[ Door closes, engine starts ]

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

TRACEY:
I get that it was stupid of me

to throw the "P" word out there
like that.

But I thought he could at least
talk to me about it.

I don´t think men are that good
at talking about fatherhood

in theory.

Certainly Laura and I never
talked about it beforehand.

It just sort of happened
without discussion.

So how did you find out?

Sorry?

The first time
Laura was pregnant.

She left the house
one afternoon.

A Saturday.
She didn´t say anything

And I watched her drive away,
and I...I knew.

I just knew she was gonna get

one of those pregnancy-test
thingies.

-How?
-I just did.

I started smiling,
and I didn´t stop for days.

Just because Woody´s scared
of the idea

doesn´t mean he´s...
scared of the idea,

if you see what I mean.

Just try him again.

[ Cellphone beeping ]

WOODY:
G´day, g´day. This is Woody.

And just because I´m not here
doesn´t mean I can´t hear you.

Someone called "Hot T"
just called this phone,

which was in my room.

And one mystery solved.

GEORGE: An interruption,
by its very nature,

is unexpected and unforeseen.

But even here,
there are certain interruptions

that catch you
completely unawares,

coming, as they do,
from way out of left field.

[ Cellphone ringing ]

-Yes?
-We have a situation.

MAN: It´s not hard to cook squid
that is actually crispy.

I´m sure you could do
much better.

HANNAH: A guy has taken over
the kitchen.

-What?
-He went in and insulted Norman,

who got the pip and took off,
so there´s a guy in the kitchen.

Well, tell him to get out
of the kitchen.

I did, and he told me to get
out of his kitchen.

His kitchen?

Yeah.
He´s cooking in there.

I told Monty to go kick him out,
but Monty´s a big girl´s blouse.

-There are knives in there.
-So call the police.

Make Tom earn his living
for a change.

Done that.
He´s on his way.

So am I.

Isn´t it cool
that this thing will go

to the other side of the world

and end up living
on some rich guy´s wall?

But you´ll never get any credit
for it.

I´ll know.
That´s what matters.

And helping Denis out.

Yeah.
That too, obviously.

I´ve been thinking
about what you said,

and I-I know what
you´re trying to do.

-You do?
-Yes.

And I want you to know
I still love you

and I´m not interested in seeing
anyone else.

Oh.

Why?

Do you want to see someone else?

I kind of am.

Already?

Well, actually I was seeing him
before I saw you,

and we broke up
before the holidays.

And now he wants
to get back together.

Well, j-just say no.

I used to think he was
a bit of an idiot, you know?

All he cared about
was being in the First XV.

Now I feel older
and I understand him more,

and we can actually talk,
and he listens.

And that´s... that´s all thanks
to you, Arlo.

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

Do you hate me?

No.

Of course not.

I wouldn´t blame you if you did.

I hope we can still be friends.

Uh, I have to go to work.

I´ll give you a lift to work.

I can walk.

No.
I´m heading that way anyway.

[ Cellphone rings ]

Smiler?

Uh, hang on a sec.
I´ll get him for you.

Hey, Smiler, it´s for you, mate.

Woody, you´re the one
that dialed.

Oh, yeah.
Hello?

Woody, are you at Smiler´s?

Yes. Yes.

Uh, we´re just doing
some solar business.

We´re trying to figure out
where I left my phone.

At George´s.

Right. Yeah.
Okay.

That makes sense.
What are you doing at George´s?

I´m not.

I´m at home, waiting for you
so we can talk.

Ah.
Yeah.

The, uh, talk thing.
Right.

Yes, Woody, the talk thing, the
one you should man up and have.

-[ Whispering ] Shut up.
-Ow.

Woody, just come home.

Yes, I could charge him
with something.

Trespass, maybe.

But having tasted the plates
he keeps bringing out,

it would be like charging
Michelangelo

with tagging the Sistine Chapel.

MONTY: No. That is the greatest
thing I have ever tasted.

HANNAH:
Yeah. I´m with Monty.

-Okay. Mmm.
-You get it, right?

If anything,
I should be charging Norman.

-Hey!
-Get off.

George, you need to try this.

-Very nice.
-FIONA: Very nice?

Sublime is what that is.

So has Norman got
a new cookbook?

I wish. No.
There´s this guy.

Apparently marched in,
took over the kitchen...

And he keeps bringing out these
offerings to the gods of food.

Is this...

-Yes, Arlo.
-FIONA: What?

It´s his party trick.

-What party trick?
-Terry!

Who?
What... What party trick?

Uncle Terry.

Terry, get your arse out here.

[ Mid-tempo music plays ]

I knew you´d find me.

Are you still pulling
this trick?

Well, you know me.

Got to give the people
what they want.

Arlo!

[ Chuckles ]
Ah.

Thank God you´re still alive.

Why wouldn´t I be?

I worry.
That´s all.

Everyone, Terry...
my baby brother.

[ Smooches ]

Hey.
Thanks for finding my phone.

TRACEY:
No worries.

Um...

-Can I go first?
-That´s the woman´s prerogative.

Unless that´s being
old-fashioned and sexist.

I don´t blame you
for freaking out.

I threw the "P" word out there

without really thinking
about it.

Yeah. It did kind of catch me
by surprise.

Yeah.
I noticed that.

It just... "Whoa!"

Big information,
smack right between me eyes,

where my brain is.

I know.
Sorry.

No, don´t be.

I should have handled it better,

especially afterwards,
when I stopped panicking

and I started to actually think
about it.

I realized...

we´d make the best babies ever.

We would.

They´d be beautiful,
funny, and smart.

And it would be hell trying to
get them to wear clothes.

[ Laughs ]

It would.

You´d be the best mum ever.

You´d be the best father.

Just not now.

No, not now.

One day.

Yeah, one day.

But until then, I, uh, reckon
we should keep practicing.

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

It´s a gift you´ve got, mate.
A gift.

Well, and a lot of hard work,
but essentially, you are right.

ROBBIE:
You´re here for how long?

I never plan that far ahead.

You never told me you had
a much more handsome brother.

And he´s gifted
and way more charming.

Mm.
A total package, eh?

GEORGE: And also amoral,
unreliable, and an egotist

who leaves a trail
of destruction behind him.

But don´t let that put you off.

Oh, it doesn´t.

MONTY:
What you did with the salmon,

it was as if God himself
had just...

Excuse me for one minute.

If you could stay in my life
forever, that´d be good.

[ Chuckles ]

You doofus.
You scared him away.

Hey, Dad.
It´s me.

Remember that problem we were
discussing the other day?

I don´t think George
is very happy to see me.

When has that been
any different?

True.

ARLO: It might help
if you gave us a little warning

before you just show up.

The element of surprise
is very important.

You and I need to talk.

You talk and I´ll listen.

[ Birds crying ]

IKE:
You got my text.

SHAY:
Sure did.

IKE: I didn´t know
if you´d make it or not.

I thought you might be too busy.

SHAY:
No. I´m finished for the day.

Why are you being all thing
about this?

-All thing?
-Like you´re morally superior.

[ Chuckles ]

Maybe... Maybe ´cause I´m not
the one committing fraud here.

Oh, give it a rest.

-It is not fraud!
-Oh, why?

Because Denis is cool with it?

Try telling that to the people
buying your paintings.

Yeah. Yours.
Not his.

So what?

So what if a rich guy
ends up with something I painted

on the wall of his mansion?

Isn´t that cool?

You´re Mr. Fight the Power
when you want to be.

Why is this any different?

I stand up
for what I believe in,

and you´re doing this for money.

Not entirely.

It´s also fun.

You said it was a job.

And am I not allowed
to have a job?

Yes!
Yes, of course!

But not this, not something

that you know deep down
you know is wrong.

Give the pop psychology a rest!

[ Sighs ]

I´m doing something I like.

If you have a problem
with that...

What?

What, Shay?
Leave?

I already decided to stay...
For you.

Don´t.

Don´t you dare hang that on me.

You decided to stay
because you wanted to stay.

Yeah, so we could hang out,
so we could spend time together!

So I´m here! Let´s go!
Let´s spend time together.

Oh, but right...

First I have to give up doing
the thing you disapprove of.

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

That´s right, isn´t it?

That´s the deal now.

Why do you want to suck
all the fun out of my life?

I don´t want to do that at all.

It´s just that you have
this thing,

and while you´re doing it,
I don´t want to be around you.

So we´re over, then?

Over some stupid paintings?

If they´re stupid...
then stop doing them.

No.

Well, then yeah.

Yes is the answer
to your question. Cool?

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

You know, I´d forgotten
how beautiful this place is.

You were far too young
to even remember this place.

Yeah, but I still have
this overwhelming sense memory

-of the beauty.
-Why are you here, Terry?

A nostalgic sense
of something missing in my life.

Or I wanted to see my brother,
who went mad

and shifted his family
to the arse end of the world.

Well, that´s very nice.
But why now?

Seemed like a good time.

-For you maybe.
-Well, why not you?

What happened to the restaurant
you were opening in Melbourne?

Yeah. Well, things didn´t go
quite according to plan.

The pig paying for it thought
that gave him the right

-to interfere with the menu.
-Yeah. And?

And there may have been
this thing with his wife...

Who was far too beautiful
for a throwback like him.

In other words,
you´ve come here to hide

from your latest cock-up.

I prefer the term "rejuvenate."

Come on, man.
I´m not here to cause trouble.

You never are, but that doesn´t
stop the inevitable, does it?

-Please say I can stay.
-You can do whatever you want.

Yeah, but I need your blessing.

I, Terry Turner,
do solemnly swear on the graves

of our beloved parents
and the saintly Laura,

that I will not cause
any distress or havoc

to my dear brother George

by messing up
his beautiful hiding place.

And my family.

You do not interfere
with the lives of my family.

All right.

Any advice Uncle Terry gives
will be well-intentioned.

And sparse... very, very sparse.

And the people here are nice.

You do not mess with them
either.

All right.
Cross my heart and hope to die.

And you do not...
I repeat... do not...

Bring your usual shit
into my world.

I just crossed my heart
and hoped to die.

There´s nothing left
for me to say.

There´s a couch if you want it.

[ Birds squawking ]

[ Exhales deeply ]

So you finally went there
with Jan, eh?

Oh, now I regret telling you
that in a moment of weakness.

Well, she´s been hot for you
for years.

She knew that I knew, and that´s
why she hates me so much.

No, she hates you because
you´re always rude to her.

I think that´s
a chicken-and-an-egg situation.

[ Mid-tempo music plays ]

Well, at least
you´re shot of her now.

So you´re clearly back
in the saddle.

You seeing anyone?

And that´s where it starts
to get complicated.

Word has spread.

-That was quick.
-It´s a Weld thing.

What we have here
is the beginnings of a mob.

So if you don´t get back
into that kitchen

-and finish what you started...
-Oh, I can do that.

You´re with me.
Come on.

Tell me tales of all the women
in your life as we cook.

Actually, I got dumped today.

What?
Is she mad?

Front page, George.
"Celebrity Chef Comes to Weld."

Tom´s got his camera here
to take a few snaps.

What?
No.

Is Fiona here?

Gone to talk Norman off a ledge
and then going home, apparently.

FIONA: So, rock star brother
in town, huh?

Yeah.
That´s not gonna end well.

Why?
What´s he done?

Well, nothing as yet,
but... but he will.

How´s Norman?

Norman will be back at work
tomorrow

as long as your brother
stays away.

Oh, he´s had his fun there.

He´s finding new ways
to torment me.

-To torment you?
-Yeah.

Like being the thing

that interrupts me
when I should be talking to you.

One of many interruptions,
so you can´t blame him entirely.

I´ve been a bit thick,
haven´t I?

What gave it away for you?

The fact that everyone else
is talking about having kids

except us.

Our kids, that is.
Not...Jan´s kids.

Yes, George, you´re right.

What if we have kids?

I mean, usually
that´s a discussion you have

when you´re much further
into a relationship.

But events have
kind of intensified things...

For me, anyway.

Meanwhile, here´s me thinking
those days are finally over,

and suddenly there´s kids
everywhere.

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

There it is.

You´ve had your kids,

which is why you´re okay
if Jan takes these ones...

-if they turn out to be yours.
-That´s not entirely true.

You´re putting up
a token resistance

´cause you think
it´s the right thing to do,

and you´re always all about
the right thing.

Meanwhile, here´s little old me.

I want kids.

I really, really want to have
children.

I just do.

I´ve got this need inside me

and a clock ticking very loudly
in my ear.

So what do you say, George?

Do you want to have kids
with me?

Okay.

The first thing I want to say is
I thought my child-raising days

-were behind me.
-Taken as a given.

And all of this has taken me
by a bit of surprise.

I get all that, George.

I just want you to be honest
with me.

I don´t know.

I honestly...

I honestly don´t know
if I can go back there.

That´s the thing, isn´t it?

You´d be going back,
whereas I...

It´s just different directions.

I´m sorry. I wish I could say
something else.

I asked you to be honest,
and you were.

[ Down-tempo music plays ]

So... So what now?

Is this us?
Are we...

It was fun.

I know I said that´s
what I wanted, but fun...

won´t do me forever.

Not when sooner rather
than later I want serious.

I´m sorry.

[ Down-tempo music playing ]

Really good kitchen skills.

I think you take after
your father.

Yeah, or you.

Well, that would be
his worst nightmare.

And what we were
talking about earlier...

Don´t you call her.

If you´re not good enough
for her,

then she is nowhere near
good enough for you.

Seriously.
You forget her.

Now, uh, I think it might be
time for you to head off home.

Where are you staying?

Well, you might find me
on your couch,

but, uh, maybe not.

Oh.

Okay.
Well...have a good night.

[ Music continues ]

TERRY: Here I was about to offer
to help clean up,

but you´ve done it all.

Amazingly,
that´s what I do around here.

You´re a bit of a showboat,
aren´t you?

I don´t know what you could
possibly mean by that.

Not like your brother at all.

Well, someone´s got to be
the black sheep.

Oh, I am sure you are
the troublemaker of the family.

Mm, George thinks so.

Personally, I feel
I´m deeply misunderstood.

Uh-huh.

You see, I live the simple life
of a nomad,

wandering from town to town,
cooking to make ends meet,

always looking for a place
to rest my weary head.

There´s a couch going
at George´s place, so I heard.

See, I don´t know
where George lives.

It´s a small town.
I´m sure you´ll find your way.

Well, maybe in the light of day.

You wouldn´t want me stumbling
around in the dark, would you?

♫ When it´s hot like this ♫

♫ The smoke goes
straight to my head ♫

♫ And I´m looking for... ♫

Oh, you are such trouble.

I get the feeling
that´s not a problem for you.

♫ The smoke goes
straight to my head ♫

♫ And I´m looking for the one ♫

♫ I´m just chasing the sun ♫

[ Man coughs, clears throat ]

Ooh. Sorry.
Not interrupting, am I?

What do you want, Robbie?

Uh, him, actually.

Just for a wee while, and then
you can get back to the old...

[ Whistles ]

Someone who wants to meet you.

[ Mid-tempo music plays ]

Terry Turner, William McNamara.

I´ve eaten in one of your
restaurants, in Sydney.

Karma something or other.

Apologies.

Details like names
sometimes escape me.

Karma Police.

Was going through
a Radiohead phase.

I never put you and George
together.

Mind you, I didn´t know
he had a brother.

Well, George likes to think
of me as the family secret.

So, why am I here?

I own this building.

And until recently, it housed
the world´s worst Chinese joint.

Thankfully, they are no more.

But my son and I were talking
about what to do with this room.

And then, out of the blue,

like the answer to a prayer,
you turn up.

[ Laughs ]

Well, I´ve never been the answer
to anyone´s prayers before.

You will be if you help me
turn this into a mecca

for lovers of great food.

What was that term you used,
Robbie?

A pop-up, Dad.

A pop-up restaurant

featuring the gastronomic work
of the great Terry Turner,

cooking only the finest cuisine,

ingredients sourced locally
from clean and green Weld.

You see, when it comes to
my town, I like to dream big.

So this is your town, is it?

In many ways, literally it is.

So when I dream about putting
Weld on the food map

and then you turn up...

Well, our partnership
was meant to be.

And if it´s money you want,
money is no object.

My son here will manage it,

and you can cook
whatever the hell you fancy.

Are you up for the challenge?

[ Ciaran McMeeken´s "Accelerate"
plays ]

GEORGE: Lives interrupted,
everything out of order,

something real replaced by...
by a whole lot of nothing.

♫ Forget the end ♫

♫ For it´ll eat you again ♫

Plans, carefully thought out
and meticulously documented

that must be thrown away.

Don´t get me wrong.

A good interruption can be
just what you need

from time to time.

A change in the world order
can be a very appealing thing.

But care is needed

to ensure that the new path
isn´t actually gonna lead you

to places
you really shouldn´t go.

♫ Accelerate ♫

♫ Accelerate ♫

We couldn´t sleep.

Me neither.

Cheese on toast?

Sure.
Why not?

As we charge though life,
cutting our own paths,

the interruptions that hurt
the most

are the ones of our own making,

where we, for whatever reason,
create our own obstacles,

bringing something good
to an abrupt and painful end.

♫ Accelerate ♫

And all that is left is the hope

that maybe one day
you can turn around, go back,

remove the obstacle,
and clear the path ahead.

♫ Yesterday has come ♫

At least there is always hope.

♫ Mm-hmm ♫

♫ Yesterday has come ♫

[ Up-tempo music plays ]