Original subtitles

Now that you have been surrounded by doctors and nurses.

Plern!

Excuse me.

Just breathe slowly.

Breathe... Slowly and deeply.

Now push!

Push!

Just keep breathing slowly.

Plern!

Okay, now take a deep breath.

A deep breath, one, two, three.

Push...

Push!

Almost done!

I can see the head.

The baby's head?

The head of your haemorrhoids.

Plern!

The World welcomed me with the sound of laughter.

I was born into a family of comedians.

We come from a long line of royal court jesters.

My grandpa was the funniest comedic group of his time.

When country music was the rage.

My grandpa founded the

Pa-Plern comedy group.

When my grandpa died, my dad took over.

The only difference is now they perform at the restaurant.

I'm the heir to the Pa-Plern comedy throne.

Please welcome

The hottest up and coming comedian.

On the funny scale makes Jack Black look like a featherweight.

Block Chris Rock.

Bury Jim Carrey.

Makes Adam Sandler forget his lyrics.

Afraid to Eddie Murphy.

Send Robin Williams Good Will Hunting.

Please welcome

Mr. Lortock Pa-Plern!

Say hello to the audience.

Don't be shy, put your hands down.

No need cover. Don't be shy.

Don't be shy. Comedian can't be shy. What's your name?

My name is Tock!

How many moms do you have?

Just one.

What the heck is he laughing at?

His dad? He is here!

Watch out his dad doesn't kick both of your butt to!

You got to wait for the audience to laugh first. Don't laugh first.

How many mothers do you have?

One.

How many fathers?

One.

I meant four!

Unfortunately, this heir to the comedy throne...

wasn't born with a funny bone.

So how did my son do?

Not funny, right?

Since that day

dad has never let me go on stage with him ever again.

Let Pepo try.

Hey Pepo, taste this.

Is it spicy? I can't eat spicy.

Not very spicy. Just swallow it already.

This is not your house, so don't be picky!

And this is the final hour of the show.

Here it is. The final hour of the show.

I went to tape this days ago.

Please welcome Mr. Pepo.

Here I come.

Hey mom, check this out.

This part is hilarious.

You don't look nervous or anything.

Well I was a little shy at first.

But after you do 10 or so tapes you just get used to it.

You're such a natural.

It's just cable.

If you made it on "Comedy Central" then you can talk.

Cable has lots of viewers too you know.

Do you want to be on the show too? I can put in a good word for you.

What did you say?

I can talk to them for you.

You can hook me up?

Yes, I can hook you up. I'm quite close to the producer. We're tight.

No, that's ok.

I am so busy I can't even keep my own schedule!

You heard me.

But I see you at home every day.

Hey! This guy is really funny.

Every time he comes out, everyone laughs.

The places you perform are for amateurs.

Once you make it on TV, then you're a professional.

Hey, why did you turn it off? I was getting ready to laugh my head off.

Just seeing my face will crack you up!

Hey stop giving me a hard time. Why did you turn it off?

Go ahead! Turn it off, if you can.

Come on! Give it your best shot.

See! You're shooting blanks.

You can't get past me if you tried.

So what do you say about that? Yeah, you got me!

Those are really lame jokes. How can you dare to go on TV?

If I were you, I wouldn't. I'd be ashamed.

Why? The money is good.

If I get one more gig, I will have enough money to go buy a piece land.

Life of debauchery?

Hey, don't steal the scene you're ruining it for me.

When you talk this way you are funnier than on TV.

This is how I normally talk. When I am on TV I have to pretend.

You got to be more like me.

If I were to walk into Tesco Lotus, the minute I step my foot in.

Girls will just start screaming for me!

Cause you stepped on their feet?

Or stole some gold necklaces?

Probably because you forgot to zip up your pants?

Grabbed someone's tits, were smashed by elevator doors, got electrocuted.

Or was there a blue light special on aisle 4?

What else...

Or what?

Or how about falling down an escalator?

But are you really going to stoop that low?

That's one of the lamest jokes!

I wonder why all of a sudden I feel really sleepy.

Mom...

Tock...

Ice cream!

Mon, uncle Pepo is here again.

Tock, Mon, you are back?

Hi dad. Hi mom.

Say hello to uncle Pepo.

Hi uncle Pepo. Hello.

Hello uncle Pepo.

Hi, you guys are growing up so fast. Study hard, okay?

Dad, here is my report card.

Tock.

What is 1 in English?

One.

What about in Chinese?

Jeck.

The number counting gag is old. My parrot at home can even do it.

You have anything more challenging?

Fine.

What is 11 in English?

One one

12? One two

13? One three

Oh god is this joke going anywhere? Nowhere to go?

13?

One Three

You dared to name your kid after Lortock.

Not considering for a second, he might not be funny?

13

One what?

Is the Songkran.

Very good.

14?

Valentine's Day.

And 15th?

Transvestite's Day

Why is that?

Because they always say "Oh Su"!

Very good sweety. Very smart my lovely daughter!

Is she up for sale? You wanna sell this one?

No way, she's one of the funniest in our group.

Is this funny?

How about your Jim Carrey impression?

Make your mouth wider, Mon.

How it is?

Yeah like that. So proud.

Now that's funny! Wider kiddo. Your sis is really funny.

Once again that the 2nd

heir to the throne beat the 1st heir like me,

Good afternoon, teacher and friends.

My name is Puchinan.

My name is Nibi

My name is Peng.

Today we would like to present...

The topic is about "Singular and Plural".

Thew, you start.

This is a...

box.

Next

This is a...

boxes.

Thew, don't pay attention to the grammar.

There are 2 boxes, then just make it to 2 words, got it?

Okay. And don't forget to pose too.

Okay, do it again.

This is a...

box, box.

Yes.

Now your turn, Hoy.

All right.

This is a...

Are you sure?

Yes, my dad used this gag before. The whole room will be rolling on the floor.

Okay.

Already, again.

This is a...

bowl.

Yes!

And for the grand finale.

This is a

bowl...

Why are there so many?

Come on, I guarantee the teacher will laugh so hard, she'll shit her pants.

This is a...

bowl.

Hoy.

Hey you think Hoy is upset?

I don't think so. He is usually quite shameless.

Hoy!

Taxi!

Hey where are you going?

Gotta go. I got to run some errands.

Hey, we're supposed to go to the market together.

Where the heck is he going in such a hurry?

Taxi!

Yeah, where the heck is he going?

What the heck? He even forgot his bag.

Yo, follow that motorcycle.

Yeah, follow that motorcycle too.

Close your eyes.

A little sting.

Hey don't touch it! You will mess up my face.

The closer I look, the uglier it is.

If you think Hoy's face is full of pimples,

you should see his sister's face!

Nothing at all!

That's good.

No!

When I said nothing at all.

Then you have to say no pimples?

So I can finish my joke.

Okay? Fine.

Let's try again.

If you think Hoy's face is full of pimples

you should see his sister's face.

Nothing at all.

No pimples?

No! No space left!

My gag. This is the first time anyone ever laughed at my joke.

Rehearsing to perform somewhere?

"Preeya Wanlertsin, M.D."

Can't be just a mere mortal.

She's got to be an angel who fell from heaven.

I saw what the doctor did to Hoy's face.

At that second I wished to have pimples too.

"Causes of Acne"

These aren't the same?

No, but I think we can put them together.

Okay then.

How come he bought a small one?

Not loud enough.

This isn't loud enough.

This one certainly does the trick.

You're growing your nose hairs for Tarzan to swing on?

You're getting ready for a TV shooting, Plern?

TV show, don't be silly.

I just want to check how we set up our jokes.

Hello.

Hello. Is this Pa-Plern comedy company?

Yes, it is.

I'm calling from Yimyim BBQ restaurant.

We'd like to have your group perform at our restaurant.

What about on Friday?

Just a sec let me check our bookings.

Which day?

Friday.

This Friday? Correct.

Friday.

I know I must be calling too late

you're probably booked already.

We have an opening.

Oh really?

What about Saturday and Sunday?

Well, for Saturday and Sunday...

Yes?

I know I shouldn't even be asking I should have known. You would be fully booked already.

No problem at all. We're available!

Then can you check for the rest of the week too.

Weekdays...

That's right.

Monday and Wednesday?

From your tone of voice, never mind then.

If not

can you check the remaining days then?

Both are still available.

Oh really?

But on Tuesday and Thursday we are...

All booked up right?

Free too, those will be the best days for us!

So which day aren't we free?

Thank you very much. Bye bye.

Plern.

Yimyim's BBQ wants us to perform there.

Really?

You know the producer of "Ha Ha Ha Ha" goes to Yimyim frequently.

The producer of "Ha Ha Ha Ha" goes there?

Hey, Plern!

So what?

So we might get to be on TV.

That doesn't happen often.

Plern, he doesn't want to be on TV. Isn't that right, son?

Even our duck wants to be on TV.

Just a cameo appearance on TV, my goodness.

And everyone is all excited.

Dad

Since you will be on TV.

I will think of a new gag, okay?

Oh no... Please don't.

Please dad? I wanna help, just one gag.

Sure.

Chum. Yes, Plern.

Make sure to go to the market today. To buy what?

Punch and limes and make sure you get a lot of it.

For what?

I'm going to need a lot when I tell Tock's punch line.

Dad!

Tock is a small guy, but he sure can drop "like it's hot" on stage.

Mountain Ountain may You and I Ou yay Emay.

Phuket Island

Beach

Hundred Thousand City.

The other day my dad took me to Million City.

And where is that?

It's 1 zero away from 100 Thousand City

This joke is da' bomb.

Would you believe this is my dad?

You can't be serious?

This is a duck, not your dad.

Yes this is my dad.

No, it's a duck!

Hey listen sir. My dad died and now reborn as this duck.

Seriously?

Of course, why should I lie?

Even the hairs on my arms are standing up.

And not just on my arms but on my butt too.

You don't believe me? Let me ask your dad something then.

What do you want to ask my dad? Go ahead.

Are you his dad? Are you tired?

And does your butt hurt now?

Because Chum is squeezing your butt, right dad?

And what are you doing here today, dad?

Ah!

How can my dad answer you?

Why are the two of you sleeping here?

Tock...

Tock, go take a shower now. Go! I'm going to cook.

You guys shouldn't be sleeping here.

Is Tock on drugs or something?

I got a pimple!

Mon, can I borrow 200 baht?

Say it, don't spray it.

Please 200 baht only.

That's a lot of money, what for?

To see a doctor.

Why?

Just give me the money, stop asking me so many questions.

I'm just kidding. Kidding.

I will charge interest 5 bath a day.

Okay.

With one condition, I go too!

No, you will be in my way.

Well it's either my way, or no way!

Okay. Let's go together.

No one was saying otherwise.

I would love my lovely sister to tag along with me.

Doctor, you have to give him a shot?

What about the facial gel?

It isn't enough for a large pimple like this, I need to inject it.

So lay down.

What did you do, how did it get so big?

He must be watching porn.

Mon!

Is there something wrong doctor?

Your sis is so cute. What is her name?

Call... My name is Mon.

Like Doraemon?

No. If you are going to call my sister by her name Salmon.

You got to say knock knock.

Salmon and cheese, doctor.

We're really related?

But if you were going to call me by my name, you got to say knock knock.

Who's there? Tock. Tick tock you know you can't stop laughing.

Tock. Who's there?

It's Lortock, like the legendary comedian.

Mon, stop spoiling my joke.

What about you, what is your nickname?

It's "Ice".

Ice?

So your family makes Ice cubes?

Yes, how did you know?

Oh I was just kidding. I was trying to be funny.

Actually, my house does sell ice cubes.

I was named after the family business.

My dad gave me my name.

So it's a Ice's shop as in Ice, right?

Of course it ice.

What am I saying here?

You guys are funny.

Am I hearing her right?

She actually thinks I'm funny.

Everyone in our family line is funny to the bone.

If I have any questions about pimples,

Can I call you?

Of course.

Here call this number, okay.

I'm here every day, except Sunday.

Take care and don't sleep too late. You will have more pimples.

Okay.

Take care and don't sleep too late. You will have more pimples.

I think she must have feelings for me.

Gosh Tock! She is a skin doctor.

She must say that to you! It's her profession.

Thew, you don't understand so shut up.

And if you haven't noticed, she is like 10 years older than you.

If you've never been in love, you will never understand. Right, Tock?

That's right.

What kind of medicine did she give you, let me see.

Hey why did you throw my pills?

You want to be cured or you want to see her again?

Man, you're a genius dude.

Gosh Hoy, I think instead of throwing those pills away.

You should have kept some for your face!

Did you use the cream like I instructed you to?

If she asks you, did you used the cream?

Then you have to say.

Yes.

Then she will ask

how come the pimple doesn't get any smaller?

Why then isn't the pimple getting smaller?

Then you have to say

I think I'm going through puberty doctor.

And then if you are going to ask her out.

Don't ask whether she will go with you or not.

Make it quick and just say the place you will take her.

Doctor, do you like to eat rump or roast beef?

There's this one good restaurant around here.

Trust me. She can't refuse.

I don't eat beef.

I'm worship Kuan Yin.

We all have a Casanova in ourselves.

You just have to bring it out.

You know pork is good too.

My stomach is acting up lately. I don't feel like eating meat.

What about seafood?

I'm allergic to shrimp.

The fish is very fresh.

I think fish smell funny.

Then how about eggs and rice?

Today I am on a vegetable diet.

A dish of Kimji might be okay?

What?

No, nothing.

Actually I can eat anything.

But today I am not free. Next time I can.

Really, doctor?

Yes!

I'm in a good mood, because I'm happy.

No sorrows, how can't I be happy.

Love is likes a Banyan tree.

It's blossoms keeping us cool in its shade.

I feel still like the water in an earthen urn.

So I'm free when I am in love.

Everything is delicious.

Everything is so tasty.

I sleep so peacefully.

Content with myself.

She is going on a date with me!

Excuse me, does Dr. Ice have a lot of patients today?

We don't allow pets in here.

What time is she going to be free?

Let me check her schedule.

She is not available today.

She's all booked.

Can you see another doctor?

No that's okay.

Dr. Ice! You finished work already?

What are you doing with a duck?

This is not a duck. This is my dad reincarnated, right?

Dad, this is Dr. Ice.

Dad, I'm going to take Dr. Ice out tonight.

So can I come home late?

What should we eat?

Well you said we can go eat next time.

Okay, let's go. What about the restaurant across the street?

It's very good.

Let's go. I'm really hungry.

Let's all go together kiddo?

I don't think I will go then.

Why not?

All of a sudden my dad said we should go home.

Right, dad?

Right?

Oh I see! Apparently he had the urge to poo.

Shall we go tomorrow?

Tomorrow I only work half-day.

We can meet for lunch.

Okay.

Tock...

Stop...

Tock, grandma is in the hospital.

What's wrong with grandma?

Hop in and I'll tell you on the way. Mom and dad are at the hospital.

All right.

What happened to you, ma'am?

I have a headache, fever.

Not enough rest.

Feel weak.

Can't eat, can't sleep.

Restless, hepatitis, indigestion.

Everything tastes bland, heartburn.

Osteoporosis, toothache.

Intestinal polyps, bad breathe.

I vomit in the morning and evening, dizzy all the time.

I have bruises and wounds, dandruff.

Constipation, blurry eye sight,

scabies on my knees and elbows.

Psoriasis.

Scurvy.

And high blood pressure!

If you have all those symptoms, why did you just come see me?

Our car broke down.

What happened to the car?

Faulty brakes, a loose clutch, broken gear.

Engine stalls, fractured gear shaft.

Mom.

Stop messing around. Please tell the doctor what is wrong!

You too! Let it go sometimes.

No need to joke around all the time.

So what's really wrong with you?

I cough.

You will have to take cough syrup.

All night.

So you need to take pills.

Until morning.

Okay then I'll give you a shot.

With blood.

Then you need an X-ray.

Can I see your medicine?

Just cough syrup! That's it?

My goodness, when he called I thought you were dying!

Look at Tock, wearing all white already.

I thought he was already in mourning.

Watch your mouth!

Or you will end up picking up the tab.

Mom, come on if you treat me this time,

I pay you back during your funeral offering.

Tock.

I was gonna ask you, where are you going all dressed up?

Nowhere.

You have a date for sure?

No, I don't.

You have a date to watch cartoons?

It's 3:00 P.M. Already, I think you're too late.

Gosh! Tock, aren't you still on baby formula

and now you have a girlfriend?

You know there's no need to get all dressed up.

Girls always fall for funny guys.

Why do you have a chopstick in your hair?

See, how little it takes to make her laugh.

Stop it.

You're making a mess.

Silly.

Don't...

What did you say?

He said, don't mess with the runt.

Right?

Why what did you hear?

Butt!

If hate me don't saying like that.

I'm going to the restroom.

This's quite entertaining?

Where are you going? Don't get in their ways.

Aren't you going to dance with them, girl?

Cut it out!

Dr. Ice.

Hey Tock.

Please hear me out. I didn't mean to stand you up.

I can explain.

My grandma got sick.

I had to rush to the hospital.

But she is feeling better now.

Tock!

You're probably in a hurry so I'll see you later.

I'm not hurry.

Dr. Ice. Hello.

Everyone, this is Dr. Ice. Tock goes see Dr. Ice for his pimples.

Hello. Hello.

This is my dad, my mom, and this is grandma.

This is uncle Gon, Uncle Chum,

Uncle Ruammit, and Uncle Pine-top.

Tock said you are sick. Hope nothing serious.

Grandma is very well.

She is perfectly healthy.

We are a very healthy family.

When my father was alive even at the age 70.

Also can doing like this.

A Bodybuilder?

Crippled!

Are you done with your shopping?

Ready to go? I will help with the cart.

Okay.

Bye. Nice to meet you.

Bye.

Bye, Tock.

Bye.

For me

It was as if she said.

Farewell Tock.

When I just saw you the very first time

I felt a bond as if we've known

I can't explain it.

It's like we met in another lifetime.

Jack Johnson

Same feeling, just looking at you, I know you got me.

But I can only look at you.

Michael Jackson

I want to hold and cherish you.

But it is too late. I don't want to steal you away.

Bruce Springsteen

I wish I'd met you before you belonged to someone.

Marilyn Manson

I wish for a miracle, one that could turn back time.

Boy George

So we won't miss each other and I can fall in love with you first.

Willie Nelson

Now it's too late. What a pity.

Tina Turner

Do miracles exist?

Yeah, you got the rhythm.

Any more patients?

Just a second.

There is Wuthinan at 5:00 PM.

But he hasn't come yet.

We have new outfits. Hey, is this coming out of our pay?

No.

Not docking your pay. There's nothing to dock.

Hey Plern.

We're just performing at the Yimyim BBQ tonight. Why do we need new uniforms?

Plern had some cut

just in case we would be on TV.

You have it all wrong, mom.

We are performing at Yimyim, so I want it to dress the part.

The place is called Yimyim!

Really? Yes!

Chuen. What about my uniform?

You can't find it? Look again, it's in one of the bags.

I looked in every bag, and can't find it.

Let me take a look then.

I am sure I grabbed everything from the shop.

Try another pose.

Gon, go stand to Ruammit's left.

Left side? Okay.

Dad. What's up, son?

I got a new gag for you.

Okay, shoot.

Yesterday I went to Million city

Did you get it?

Where is it?

Ruammit, come here.

I want you to be stand closer to this side.

Or else every time we take a picture all of us. We'll have to pose again.

Chum, are you done?

Already.

Come here.

You designed this suit? Yes!

So many stars.

Is this a suit or planetarium?

Pine-top!

I can't find it yet!

You're the only one left. Hurry up!

There's nothing at the bottom of the bag either.

Oh my god.

My goodness.

Mon, that's uncle Pine-top's suits!

Do you want my shoes too?

Stand proud and look into the camera.

Hey do like the cameraman and stay focused for a second will you?

The suits are expensive.

Put your hand up like this. This looks cool.

Are we comedians or filming a movie?

You're a punk, shorty.

Who's short?

I will be taller than you next year.

My foot.

Don't even think about it.

Never mind, just step on me whenever.

Ready?

Be cross.

Get ready.

Smile, smile.

One, two, three.

I want this picture to look good.

Ready, One, two, three.

Mom.

Okay ready, all at once.

Mom.

I am going out to see my friends.

Okay, ready?

Okay!

Pa-Plern Comedy group!

Today the weather is very hot. Very sunny every day. How is it there?

Raining?

Seriously.

I can't go back this weekend. A lot of doctors are taking off.

No one to help Dr. Thip.

No, I didn't say she broke her hip.

I said no one to help Dr. Thip.

I can't take any time off yet. I haven't even been working here a month yet.

Yes we talk sometimes.

2 beef barbecue sticks.

Well he studies very hard and is very busy working.

Here you go.

I don't know either. How much?

20 baht.

What? 20 baht.

Just a little.

I don't know.

Don't get upset.

Milk, please.

Mom it is very noisy here. I will call you again later.

Bye mom.

Hey Tock.

Dr. Ice. Are you alone?

How come you didn't show up for our appointment?

I wasn't free. I went out with my girlfriend.

What about your boyfriend. He didn't come with you?

The guy I met at Tesco Lotus.

That's Dr. Thip's boyfriend.

Dr. Thip's boyfriend? Yeah!

And who are you buying the milk for your girlfriend?

Actually, I don't have a girlfriend yet.

How much is it? 10 baht.

I'll get it this time.

Next time it's your treat.

And no need to get all dressed up.

Just casual is fine.

Thank you.

Hey doc, you know we are...

actually eating horse meat!

Really?

Seriously?

You see there are sesame seeds!

Have one horse!

And these chopsticks once belonged to a movie director.

How do you know?

See. Cut! Cut!

You know you're the only person

Is that right?

Yeah!

What made you come to Lopburi province?

You like monkeys?

When I was an intern, I used to work with Dr. Thip.

When I graduated, Dr. Thip then has a clinic here.

So she asked me to come work with her.

You don't have to call me doctor, just Ice is fine.

Okay, Ice.

How come I never met you before?

Well it was long time ago. You were probably in kindergarten back then.

How old are you now?

I am 12 turning 13.

I am 12 years older than you!

And now

we proudly present the most famous comedy show in Monkey Town.

Plern, they want us to perform at the BBQ restaurant.

You know the producer of "Ha Ha Ha Ha" always go there.

We are performing at Yimyam, so I want to look great.

"Yimyim BBQ"

No, the restaurant is called Yimyim

And now please welcome the Pa-Plern comedy show.

Thank you very much and hello everyone.

So we meet again.

Tonight we will present the story of Titanic.

Hey isn't that your dad's comedy group?

I don't think so.

They probably just look similar.

You're mistaken.

Ice, let's go to another restaurant.

The food is better at this other place.

The pork here smells.

The sauce is as bland as water. It's ruining my appetite.

I think it tastes okay. Kind of tasty.

Hey there's your dad!

He dances so cute! Can you dance like that?

Stop!

Enough!

Ladies and gentlemen,

please welcome

A rising superstar

Anything wrong?

Nothing. An up and coming comedian in Thailand.

On the funny scale this person makes Jack Black look like a featherweight.

Block Chris Rock.

Bury Jim Carrey.

You sure you are okay?

I think my dad is going to call me up on stage.

Tock, you have to perform too?

I'm not sure.

Go for it!

Everyone, please welcome...

Salmon Pa-Plern!

Come here. She is my youngest kid.

And he is my eldest dad.

I'm the eldest dad, and who is the youngest dad then?

This guy.

And who is your middle dad?

And what do you have there?

A sheep.

No, I'm sure it's a duck.

It's a sheep.

It's a sheep cause I already broke the Bank.

It's not my turn. It's my sister's.

All right everyone,

Actually we have one more member

I'd like to introduce you to

Mr. Lortock Pa-Plern.

Yes you! Come here. The one who's sitting with the hottie.

Yes, you Tock!

Go up, your dad is calling you.

Let's give a round of applause for Lortock Pa-Plern.

My distinguished guests I would like to ask,

Why do you ask?

If they are full then please reserve

a small place in the restroom for this boy.

This kid is a comedic genius.

When he steps foot on stage, people bursts out into laughter.

Please welcome him to the stage.

What wrong?

Sorry I am late.

I just got back from 100 Thousand City.

And?

No...

I'm sorry I'm late.

I just got back from Million City.

Where the heck is Million City?

Well, it is just a little further from 100 Thousand City.

But before I arrived 100 Thousand city

I stopped by at Ten Thousand City

He is still trying.

See, the audience is silent.

This is my nephew, but my boss's son.

Please pay your respect to his dead joke.

Dad! Yes, sweetie?

I went to Million City too.

Oh yeah?

And I bought something.

What did you buy?

The kind of stuff that is difficult to find.

This piggy bank was difficult to find?

Yes.

How so?

Some shops have it and some don't.

Let's hear it for my daughter's funny joke.

And you, don't tell anyone you are my son.

It's embarrassing.

Do you have any other talents sweety?

I can recite the multiplication table backwards.

Just reciting the table normally is difficult and you can do it backwards?

Show me!

2x1 = 2, 2x2 =4

2x3 = 6, 2x2 =8

2x5 = 10

I am not funny.

No one laughs at my jokes.

No matter how much I try, it's not funny

Da-dum crash is a sound I never hear.

My show always silence.

Just silence.

Your dad's just kidding.

But it hurts.

I understand.

It hurts.

Tock, don't think too much.

No, I mean my hand. It really hurts.

Let me see.

Hold on.

For such a small scratch you sure make a lot of noise.

Come on, just sting a bit.

These bandages should do it.

I am sorry.

For what?

If I get a pimple, I will charge you for the bill.

Plern.

The R.I. P gag was really funny.

Yeah!

Do you think we should have Tock

That's a good idea. Yeah, I think so too.

Hello...

Why do you guys always tease him? You might hurt his feelings.

Cheun, our kid isn't funny.

If I say he is funny,

then I don't think I would do him justice.

And where is our son? How come you guys didn't come home together.

There he is.

Tock

Did you take your girlfriend home or something?

You see.

He's giving you the silent treatment.

This isn't just a typical silent treatment.

He looks like he's going to silence of the Lamb.

Yeah silent.

Good one, jot it down. I like this gag.

Silence of the Lamb.

A lonesome cowboy

No one knows who his parents are, where he is from.

Even on his gravestone there is no name.

His body is riddled with wounds and scars

from fighting on the battle field.

But his brutal reputation

spread far and wide throughout

Bangkok, Bali, Saigon, Singapore

Indonesia, Korea, Japan

and Malaysia.

There is a fury burning inside his heart

Today he will take revenge on his enemy.

He walks to the door

slowly opens it

and shouts...

Mom, where are the fried garlic chives?

Mon ate them all.

But there is some custard bread left.

Plern.

Why do you like to tease Tock?

I didn't.

I was trying to make up with him.

He hasn't talk to you yet, right?

What did you do to him that

made him this upset?

Tock.

Please excuse us. I want to talk to dad.

So what did you do to him this time?

Hello?

Yes, it's Pa-Plern comedy group.

Yes!

What's that?

Oh you are calling from "Ha Ha Ha Ha"?

Okay. Yes, we are available.

Plern! Ha Ha Ha Ha is on the line.

They're looking for a new comedian to replace Pepo.

They want us to go to an audition.

What show?

"Ha Ha Ha Ha", you know!

Oh yeah?

You don't want to go?

Fine. I will tell them.

I'm sorry...

For keeping you waiting for so long.

Yes, we are available.

10:30 P. M? Okay.

See you then. Bye.

Excuse me. Is Dr. Ice here?

I got her some milk.

She is not here. She went to the hospital.

Is she sick?

She's been throwing up all morning.

Probably food poisoning from the BBQ.

Really?

You have food poisoning?

How come I am okay.

How are you feeling?

I feel like throwing up.

Talking like that, people will think you are pregnant.

Yes!

So is it diarrhoea or gas?

I'm pregnant.

Pregnant as in with a baby?

Really?

"Physical health textbooks"

Five times seven equals 35

Plus 2

Then over...

7 Over 7.

After over...

37 over 7.

Mr. Wuthinun, class 6/3, there's a call for you at the Admin office.

Hello

Help you with what?

Hey! Please don't do that!

Please clear the way, excuse me.

She collapsed with blood all over. Don't know what happened.

Students, please stand up.

Thank you, teacher.

Excuse me, is Dr. Ice here?

No. She went to Bangkok since this morning.

Why?

I don't know.

Do you have her address?

No, I don't.

"Preeya's Ice Shop"

"Bangkok, the terminal"

"Preeya's Ice Shop"

Is your name Ice?

Is there only Ice who lives here? Anyone named Miss Ice-Preeya?

Her name is Ice.

And my name is Preeya.

Who are you looking for?

Hello

Mr. Guang, what can I do for you today?

I can't hear you.

2 blocks of ice?

You wanted it crushed and delivered. Sorry, I got to put you on hold.

Mom, I have to go now.

You are going back already? You just got here.

Yes, I know but the clinic is quite busy.

All right. Call me when you arrive.

Hello Mr. Guang, we will deliver that right the way.

2 blocks of Ice. Crushed. Yes, okay.

"Preeya's Ice Shop"

Is this Dr. Ice-Preeya's Ice shop?

She already went back to Lopburi.

I will go see her there then.

Is your condition that bad?

Yes.

I am very sick, love sick.

What did you say?

Never mind. Goodbye.

Hey kid, the expressway toll.

Here.

"Bangkok, Lop Buri"

Hey what's this?

Here's the ticket.

Sorry, my bus leaves in the morning.

Your bus already left.

You tripping?

Hello may I talk to mom.

Hello, this is Barack Obama.

What government needs is adult supervision

This is me, Tock. I need to talk to Mom!

Your mom is now pooping.

Come on uncle Ruammit, I'm running out of coins.

Okay...

Chuen, the phone. It's for you.

Thanks. Okay.

Hello? Hello, mom?

Yes Tock. What's it, son?

Now I'm...

"Bangkok, Lop Buri"

Excuse me

Can I hitch a ride?

I will pay you when I arrive in Lopburi.

Poor child

Looks at you...

Okay, go sit at the front of the bus.

Gosh no XXL size or something?

Let's hit the road.

"Mr. Wuthinun Likitjaroenphong."

Where have you been?

Where have you been, Tock? Where?

You know everyone is worried about you!

We have been looking all over the town!

Was it fun?

You are going too far now.

Why are you doing this? Why?

Was it fun? Was it?

Why don't you answer?

What's in your mouth?

Answer me! Why!

How can you be so inconsiderate?

Why don't you answer me! Why!

Tock!

Where have you been?

You know that dad has been looking for you all night.

I ran into him already.

I didn't go do anything bad.

I called you, but my money ran out first.

Then go take a shower. And we can talk later.

Go take a shower now.

Tock, you are back?

Yes!

Where did you go last night?

Stop asking me so many questions? Go take a shower.

And why did you wear this to sleep?

We were going to be on TV last night.

But dad went looking for you. So we couldn't make it.

Your money... I took it.

I will pay you back.

And I will buy you a new piggy bank.

No, you don't have to.

There are some curries left. Go eat it.

Chuen.

It's good that he is back and okay.

Cheun.

Yes mom.

Usually Tock isn't a trouble maker.

Cheun.

Just a sec, mom.

But lately, I notice he has been keeping to himself.

I wonder what's on his mind.

Yeah!

I was trying to tell you, since you mentioned about the curry.

But you kept saying.

You go in first.

Are you ditching class to go somewhere?

Yesterday my mom told me some kid came by

joking that he was sick. Love sick.

I just want to tell you

it is dangerous to go to Bangkok alone.

Please don't have an abortion!

If you really have no one,

I will be the father.

Are you crazy? You are just a kid, how can you be a father.

I'm serious. I'm not joking.

Even though you don't love me, that's okay.

I remember every word

that Dr. Ice said to me.

Dr. Ice and her boyfriend studied in the same class.

And right after graduation,

her boyfriend got a scholarship to study in the USA.

And about a month after he left, she found out that she got pregnant.

I'm very confused and I don't know how to tell him.

How come?

Because...

we have never talked about marriage.

But if he really loves you. He will be responsible.

The more he loves me,

the more I don't want him to know.

Why?

Because he will have to give up his scholarship

just to come back to marry me.

I will feel guilty...

for the rest of my life.

My goodness, you sound like Rose from Titanic.

But actually, I don't have the heart to tell him.

Maybe I'm afraid he will dump me.

So what are we going to do then?

Let me examine your face.

If I want to have clear skin like this, is it too late?

How is my face holding up? Still tight?

But tight like this, you got to check out my wife's face.

It's tighter than this even.

Behind her ears?

Hey, you're funny have you signed with anyone yet?

Tock is here a lot. And always tell me jokes.

Doc, you're very close to my son.

Do you know what his problem is?

Do you think Tock can become a comedian?

I don't know.

He doesn't have the knack for comedy.

Why don't you be straight with him.

Well, if he wants to be a stand-up comic,

As a father, how can I say something like that to him?

You don't think Tock already knows himself?

Do you know why Tock tries so hard?

Because he is afraid that if he is not funny,

then his dad won't love him.

"Mr. Wuthinun Likitjaroenpong, class 6/3"

"Joke basics: Set up, Build up, Punch-line, and Payoff"

"Photo joke..."

"About the turtle humour..."

"Hill is my..."

"This joke is about the monk"

"Welcome to joke"

"Fan for English is fan"

"Once again that the 2nd heir to the comedy throne leaves me standing in the dust"

"Since then my dad has never invited me on stage again"

Remember, my mom can't see me drinking like this, all right!

Why, your mom will scold you? No, she will grab it and drink it herself.

Have a seat.

Hey what's up Tock?

You look like a half-eaten banana

Want a sip? Might feel better.

No...

Hey Tock is still a boy.

When Plern gets here, he would kill us.

Mix it with soda or water?

Just Pepsi.

Hey if Plern comes back,

I will slap his face, take off his clothes, kick him out

rough him up, and steal his ex-wife and new wife all in one breath.

Hey Chum what have you been touching?

I've been holding the fish that you caught.

That's why my head smells like dead fish.

Is this expired Pepsi?

Bitter like a pill.

Hey that's my glass.

"Numbers 555"

I might still be a kid

but my heart is like a man.

Have you all ever been in love?

When we love someone

we can do anything for that person.

I love her very much.

I followed her to Bangkok

tried to help her.

But I was useless.

I've never been to Bangkok

but I went because of her.

Why don't you have a seat, Tock?

Sit down son.

No, I don't want to sit.

I am not drunk!

See I am not drunk.

Tock.

Your dad.

Plern.

Come have a seat.

Hey you're home really late. Where have you been?

He just had one sip.

What time is it?

I got to go. I am going to donate food to the monks.

Hey this late, the monks are not even awake yet.

Well, I will wake them up.

You guys don't even know where the monks live.

Don't worry I will take you.

Boss, what about me?

Take the booze with you.

Thank you boss.

Hey you guys are leaving already?

We can't stay.

Bye.

Why dad?

I don't understand.

How is it that a person can do so much for someone?

Yes.

Do you even know who I'm talking about?

Well who the heck are you talking about then?

Dr. Ice.

Who else!

So what about Dr. Ice?

She's pregnant.

With who?

I wish it were me, dad!

But she got pregnant with her boyfriend.

So what's the problem then?

Tock...

Hello.

Dad, why is it so bitter?

Let it all out, don't hold anything back.

Take of your shoes, son.

The both of you look the same.

Go Plern, go take a shower now. I will look after him.

Okay.

Mom.

I want to know how funny do I have to be

to get dad to love me?

Why are you talking like that?

Because I am not funny like Mon, right?

That's why dad doesn't love me.

How can you think that.

But isn't it true, mom?

Tock, if anyone has the right to feel this way,

it must be Mon, not you.

Remember the Mother's Day when you're in kindergarten?

Students, please pay respects

by pinning the flower to your mother.

Students, please pay respects

by pinning the flower to your mother.

I remember you came late.

No, I didn't even go.

Yes, you did.

How could I? I gave birth to Mon that day.

What does Mon's birthday have anything to do with this?

Tock, I gave birth to Mon at the hospital that day

so how could have I gone to your school's event?

Think carefully, who went that day.

Students, please pay respects

by pinning the flower to your mother.

You didn't think mommy would miss out on today, did you?

Come!

Better late than never.

Now everyone pin the Jasmine on to your mom.

Everyone was so busy at the hospital.

But your dad was worried about your school event.

Mom, can I bring my sister to play up?

But in the future, and now your sister is too young.

So if he didn't love you, he wouldn't go through all the trouble.

One, two, three

What are you looking?

Dad, did you take this picture?

Yes, why?

It's blurry.

But I like it.

Let's go to Yimyim BBQ tonight.

Invite Dr. Ice too, okay!

Don't be shy.

You gotta be brave if you want to be a hero.

Look at this girl, she doesn't come from an ordinary family.

That means her family is rich.

Okay!

How much?

Never sat on a bus.

That's pretty wealthy.

No, cause she's always has to stand.

Where did you go to school?

International school.

How much is your tuition? 200 pounds.

Pound?

No that's how many pound cakes I had to sell.

How is the dog at home doing? Why?

Did you know your dog's teeth are yellow?

Are they?

Yeah, your dog loves to eat shit!

His teeth so yellow that traffic slows down every time he barks.

Exactly. What about the owner?

I have yellow teeth too

So yellow, my family has to wear SPF 50!

So this is your daughter? Yes.

Then I don't think I should get close to your daughter.

Next I will summon a spirit into this kid's body.

Please cover her with some clothes. All right.

Go ahead.

Do you want a bowl cut or go skinhead?

Skinhead because I like it short. No!

Cover her up.

"Incantation"

Now the Demon's spirit is here.

Anyone has a question to ask?

Demon? Yes.

Follow me. I'm right behind you.

You know everyone? Yes.

No matter what nationality or religion? Yes.

Demon? Yes.

Follow me. I'm following you.

Demon? Yes.

What colour is this lady's shirt?

Green.

Demon? Yes.

What am I holding?

A mic in your right hand, a phone in your left hand.

How is she doing that?

Demon? Yes.

How did you know that?

Because you wrote it right here.

Yes I did, didn't I?

Demon? Yes.

Follow me. I'm following you

So you know everyone? I know.

No matter what nationality or religion? I know.

What colour is this lady's shirt?

Cream with green border.

So specific.

Demon? Yes.

Is this lady beautiful?

I can't see, too far.

Too far? Excuse me can you come closer?

No thank you.

Go ahead, Ice, you can do it.

It's okay. It's just for a second.

It won't take long.

Demon? Yes.

Can you see her now.

I can't see, still too far.

I dropped it.

Please be careful.

Demon? Yes.

Now can you see? Yes.

Does she have a boyfriend?

Beautiful like this of course she does.

She has a boyfriend already.

What is her boyfriend name?

Too difficult.

Can I have his initials?

Okay please give me his first initial?

H

H as in?

Harry Potter?

Henry?

Hilarious?

Hammer?

H as in Hoochie?

What happened to the censor?

May I go now?

Can we let her go?

Okay.

She going down now.

So what is your boyfriend name? Not going to tell?

No answer?

Zh.

Please give her a round of applause.

Okay, she is on her way back,

walking down towards you.

All right, she is walking back.

That was funny!

First, why did you jot down girls' numbers?

Her boyfriend is a man!

That's how she got pregnant.

Second.

Didn't you say that her boyfriend is studying aboard?

So international numbers have many digits.

The numbers you wrote down here are all local numbers.

Well how am I supposed to know that?

I've never had a girlfriend who studied aboard.

Me neither! But how come I know?

So if you knew why didn't you tell me then?

I didn't know you don't know. If I knew you didn't know,

I would have told you to let you know!

I am dizzy now. Instead of knowing something. Now I know nothing.

So what now?

If you are so smart, find it yourself then, dad!

Gosh! You took her phone?

No time to put it back.

Won't she be looking for her cell by now?

And there's a ton of numbers in here. How are we going to know which number is it?

"Panthip clinic"

Panthip...

Hey, Dr. Ice is calling! Dad, don't answer it!

If you want to know who her boyfriend is

why don't you just look for a juicy SMS,

Even a kid like me could figure that out.

I'm off to bed now.

Who is Oink Oink? So many SMS from him.

Tock, go ahead and read one.

I don't like to stick my nose in other people's business.

I am not that close to her.

Just admit it. You can't read English.

I want to kiss your freak.

Hello.

You mean cheek?

Oh you're right! Kiss your cheek.

Who the heck wants to kiss a freak?

I miss you, babe.

This must be the guy.

Dad, can you please talk to him.

Why don't you talk to him yourself?

I'm a kid he will think I am playing a prank.

Noppadon is not here right now

Do you want me to leave him a message?

Oh yeah. Okay.

No...

Okay.

Because...

thank you and seat down.

He is speaking English, I don't understand.

May I speak to Mr. Oink Oink.

What? Mr. Oink Oink.

Mr. Oink Oink, Thailand.

Oh yeah, he just came in.

Hold on one second.

Dad, talk to him.

Hello, I am Dr. Ice's father.

Dad!

He is not on the phone yet.

Hello Hello

Hello.

Hello

Hello, can you hear me?

Hello.

Who's speaking?

Hello.

Is that Mr. Oink Oink?

Pardon me?

Or just Oink?

No, my name is Ham.

Oink like a Pig. A pig says oink.

Ham, Ham is Pig.

Who is this?

Are you Dr. Ice's boyfriend?

Yes, I am.

Dr. Ice the dermatologist, right?

Yes. What's going on?

She is pregnant.

What did you say? And who are you?

Ice told you to call me?

And is she there now? Can I talk to her?

Please calm down.

Dr. Ice doesn't know that I called you.

Is this a prank?

How come she didn't tell me herself?

She's afraid to tell you.

She doesn't want you to stop studying to come back to take care of her.

But I think

if I have a choice

to be a father,

I would want to see the face of my new-born baby.

Right?

Uh...

That's all I wanted to say.

Dad, Mr. Oink Oink is calling back.

What?

And why are you still here. Go!

Tock? Dr. Ice, your phone.

Hello, what's up?

Yes, I can talk. Don't you have class?

Yes.

I will.

But you have to get down on your knees

Yeah.

Okay.

"Lopburi kindergarten. Graduation day."

More dad, I want to look more slutty.

You look quite slutty already.

Come on, it's my last show, lay it on thick!

Dad.

Is it okay if I am not going to be a comedian?

Of course.

What do you want to be then?

I don't know yet.

Dad.

If I am not funny, will girls like me?

You once told me girls like funny guys

But what girls like the most is a family man!

Do you want a mole too?

That's a good idea.

So you can be slutty to the max!

Go break a leg. Don't ruin my reputation.

Hello.

Gosh the noise is deafening. Where is everybody?

Turn around.

Hello.

I'm not sure whether I was funny or not.

But it doesn't matter anymore.

"Lopburi hospital 2009"

His bridge is so high. So cute.

How many batteries you got?

Four for this model.

You are so silly.

You can plug this model in.

No, he runs on Solar power.

May I hold him?

Yes.

He is still asleep, be careful.

Tock, you know how to hold a baby?

Be careful son.

What is his name?

We are still deciding.

What do you think his name should be?

I think his name should be 'Shoe'.

What name?

I said Shoe.

Shoe?

Yeah because I've never met

a woman who doesn't love her shoes.

I think his name should be "O".

Oh!

Why "O"?

Because I think he's adorable. Whenever people see him,

they will say Oh he's "O" so cute.

I think I'm cross eyed now trying to follow everyone's jokes.

You seem to be really into this baby. Why don't you adopt him.

How about it Tock? You can have my baby.

Are you joking?

No. I'm serious.

You will be his godfather, okay?

Like they say...

we never know...

the love of a father

until the day we become a father ourselves.