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1
00:00:14,282 --> 00:00:16,250
- Tim, your life
hasn't come to an end
2
00:00:16,284 --> 00:00:17,818
just because some new
girl at the newspaper
3
00:00:17,851 --> 00:00:19,820
won't go out with you?
4
00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:23,224
- Uncle Martin, this
isn't just some girl!
5
00:00:23,257 --> 00:00:24,692
This is Cynthia Parker!
6
00:00:24,725 --> 00:00:25,626
Why, she is,
7
00:00:25,659 --> 00:00:27,561
she is the most wonderful,
8
00:00:27,595 --> 00:00:28,762
the most marvelous,
9
00:00:28,796 --> 00:00:30,198
why, the most gorgeous!
10
00:00:30,231 --> 00:00:31,832
- And the most unattainable.
11
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:34,402
You earthlings confound me.
12
00:00:34,435 --> 00:00:35,536
The minute you can't
have something,
13
00:00:35,569 --> 00:00:37,771
that's the very
thing you must have.
14
00:00:37,805 --> 00:00:39,773
We have a saying on Mars,
15
00:00:39,807 --> 00:00:42,443
"The forbidden fruit
is the sweetest."
16
00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:44,145
- We have the same saying here.
17
00:00:44,178 --> 00:00:45,513
- I'm sure we had it first.
18
00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:48,382
(audience laughs)
19
00:00:50,718 --> 00:00:52,520
- Well, I don't understand it.
20
00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,188
I tried everything,
21
00:00:54,222 --> 00:00:56,490
charm, wit, romantic looks.
22
00:00:58,192 --> 00:00:59,360
You know, as a matter of fact,
23
00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:01,495
I was completely
irresistible all day.
24
00:01:01,529 --> 00:01:03,331
- I think I know
what the problem is.
25
00:01:03,364 --> 00:01:04,132
- [Tim] What?
26
00:01:04,165 --> 00:01:06,334
- You have an
inferiority complex.
27
00:01:06,367 --> 00:01:08,502
(audience laughs)
28
00:01:08,536 --> 00:01:10,338
- If I could just
get a date with her.
29
00:01:10,371 --> 00:01:13,674
- Tim, you musn't let
this become an obsession.
30
00:01:13,707 --> 00:01:16,377
After all, Cynthia Parker is
not the only girl in the world.
31
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:17,311
You've got to remember that
32
00:01:17,345 --> 00:01:19,580
there are plenty of
other fish in the sea.
33
00:01:19,613 --> 00:01:21,215
- I suppose you're right.
34
00:01:21,249 --> 00:01:24,185
Well I guess I'll just
have to brainwash myself.
35
00:01:24,218 --> 00:01:28,289
There are plenty of
other fish in the sea.
36
00:01:28,322 --> 00:01:31,592
There are plenty of
other fish in the sea.
37
00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:34,395
There are plenty of other fish.
38
00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:37,265
Oh.
39
00:01:37,298 --> 00:01:38,699
Oh.
40
00:01:38,732 --> 00:01:39,800
Oh.
41
00:01:39,833 --> 00:01:41,001
- What is it?
42
00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:43,704
- While I was down at the sea,
I just saw Cynthia Parker.
43
00:01:43,737 --> 00:01:44,905
She's in a bathing suit.
44
00:01:44,938 --> 00:01:46,474
(audience laughs)
45
00:01:46,507 --> 00:01:49,377
(bemused music)
46
00:01:51,812 --> 00:01:54,715
(strange music)
47
00:01:54,748 --> 00:01:57,117
(beeping)
48
00:02:07,828 --> 00:02:10,498
(playful music)
49
00:02:24,245 --> 00:02:26,814
(lively music)
50
00:02:37,791 --> 00:02:38,592
- Tim.
51
00:02:38,626 --> 00:02:39,427
- [Tim] What?
52
00:02:39,460 --> 00:02:41,795
- You dropped that dish.
53
00:02:41,829 --> 00:02:44,298
- Oh I'm sorry, Uncle Martin.
54
00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:46,934
I wish you'd stop that
martian levitation bit.
55
00:02:46,967 --> 00:02:48,302
It makes me nervous.
56
00:02:48,336 --> 00:02:49,403
- I make you nervous?
57
00:02:49,437 --> 00:02:50,604
With the state you're in,
58
00:02:50,638 --> 00:02:52,240
I'm afraid to let you
cross the street alone.
59
00:02:52,273 --> 00:02:53,641
- Oh Uncle Martin, I'm sorry,
60
00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:56,610
but I just can't get
Cynthia Parker off my mind.
61
00:02:56,644 --> 00:02:59,413
Look, what did you do when
you had a situation like this,
62
00:02:59,447 --> 00:03:00,748
on Mars?
63
00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:01,982
- Huh?
64
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:02,816
- Well, you know, I
mean if you found a girl
65
00:03:02,850 --> 00:03:04,618
that you're interested
in taking out
66
00:03:04,652 --> 00:03:06,287
and she turned you down?
67
00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:08,956
- I don't believe I've ever
been in that situation.
68
00:03:08,989 --> 00:03:10,991
- You mean you've never
been turned down by a girl?
69
00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:11,792
- [Martin] No.
70
00:03:11,825 --> 00:03:12,960
- How come?
71
00:03:13,827 --> 00:03:15,496
(audience laughs)
72
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:18,566
Oh, of course, that martian
mind-reading ability of yours!
73
00:03:18,599 --> 00:03:19,933
All you had to do
was read their minds
74
00:03:19,967 --> 00:03:22,570
and then you knew
exactly what to say.
75
00:03:22,603 --> 00:03:23,804
Ah.
76
00:03:23,837 --> 00:03:25,606
Ah, but what about
the girls, huh?
77
00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:27,541
I mean, when you read their
mind, didn't they object?
78
00:03:27,575 --> 00:03:29,810
- Ah ah ah ah ah,
ah, they loved it.
79
00:03:29,843 --> 00:03:32,746
They could think lots of things
they were too shy to say.
80
00:03:32,780 --> 00:03:34,715
(audience laughs)
81
00:03:34,748 --> 00:03:35,749
- That's it!
82
00:03:36,684 --> 00:03:38,319
Uncle Martin, that's
how I'm gonna get a date
83
00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:39,453
with Cynthia Parker!
84
00:03:39,487 --> 00:03:40,688
- How?
85
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,723
- You're gonna read
her mind for me.
86
00:03:42,756 --> 00:03:43,891
- I'm going to do what?
87
00:03:43,924 --> 00:03:45,359
- Now look, all you
have to find out
88
00:03:45,393 --> 00:03:47,395
is what she likes and
what she doesn't like.
89
00:03:47,428 --> 00:03:48,696
I'll take over from there.
90
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,298
- But it doesn't seem fair, Tim,
91
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:52,733
using my martian powers to
win a girlfriend for you.
92
00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:54,402
- Uncle Martin, now look,
93
00:03:54,435 --> 00:03:56,804
why don't you just sort
of consider this a, um,
94
00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:57,838
a problem, yes,
95
00:03:57,871 --> 00:03:59,707
a problem in market research.
96
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:00,674
As a matter of fact,
97
00:04:00,708 --> 00:04:01,609
that's the department
she's in at the paper,
98
00:04:01,642 --> 00:04:02,810
market research.
99
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:05,679
- I'm sorry, Tim, but it just
doesn't seem ethical somehow.
100
00:04:05,713 --> 00:04:09,450
- Uncle Martin, I'm not
asking you to use your powers
101
00:04:09,483 --> 00:04:11,319
to do anything wrong.
102
00:04:11,352 --> 00:04:12,453
No!
103
00:04:12,486 --> 00:04:15,356
No, all I want you to do is
to find out how she thinks
104
00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:17,458
so that I can please her.
105
00:04:18,526 --> 00:04:19,693
- Well...
106
00:04:19,727 --> 00:04:20,628
- Uncle Martin,
you've gotta do it!
107
00:04:20,661 --> 00:04:21,829
It's a matter of life and death!
108
00:04:21,862 --> 00:04:23,931
- Of course it would save the
wear and tear on the dishes.
109
00:04:23,964 --> 00:04:25,633
- What's it gonna be?
110
00:04:25,666 --> 00:04:28,769
- It's against my better
judgment, but, um,
111
00:04:28,802 --> 00:04:30,504
I'll read her mind for you.
112
00:04:30,538 --> 00:04:32,373
- Uncle Martin, you'll
never regret it.
113
00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:34,608
(laughs) I feel like a new man!
114
00:04:34,642 --> 00:04:36,477
(audience laughs)
115
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:37,311
- Tim!
116
00:04:37,345 --> 00:04:38,379
(glass breaking)
117
00:04:38,412 --> 00:04:39,580
(audience laughs)
118
00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:42,450
(uncertain music)
119
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:44,585
- There she is.
120
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,354
- Incredible.
121
00:04:46,387 --> 00:04:48,422
That's real martian beauty.
122
00:04:48,456 --> 00:04:51,592
- [Tim] Yeah, I told you
she was out of this world.
123
00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:54,362
- Somehow I can't
see you two together.
124
00:04:54,395 --> 00:04:55,596
- Well you just read
her mind for me,
125
00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,531
you'll never see us apart.
126
00:04:57,565 --> 00:04:59,099
- Are you sure you wanna
go through with this?
127
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:00,033
- Yeah, I'm positive.
128
00:05:00,067 --> 00:05:00,901
Come on.
129
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:06,807
Miss Parker.
130
00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:08,842
- [Cynthia] Mr.
O'Hara, isn't it?
131
00:05:08,876 --> 00:05:10,544
- Yes, that's right.
132
00:05:10,578 --> 00:05:11,979
I would like to introduce
my uncle, Martin O'Hara.
133
00:05:12,012 --> 00:05:14,648
Uncle Martin, may I introduce
Miss Cynthia Parker?
134
00:05:14,682 --> 00:05:15,483
- How do you do?
135
00:05:15,516 --> 00:05:16,850
- Very glad to meet you.
136
00:05:16,884 --> 00:05:19,720
- Uncle Martin is very
interested in consumer research,
137
00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:20,954
so when he found out that
138
00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:22,356
we had a new person
in this department,
139
00:05:22,390 --> 00:05:23,491
he wanted to come
right up and meet you.
140
00:05:23,524 --> 00:05:25,493
- Well are you in
market research?
141
00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:26,894
- Only as a hobby.
142
00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:30,063
- He, um, he's a
professor of anthropology,
143
00:05:30,097 --> 00:05:31,665
and, uh, well he's fascinated
144
00:05:31,699 --> 00:05:35,068
by the science of delving
into the consumer mind.
145
00:05:35,102 --> 00:05:37,871
- Well I'm still
fascinated by that myself.
146
00:05:37,905 --> 00:05:39,540
Trying to figure out
what people are thinking
147
00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:41,141
is a real challenge.
148
00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:42,943
- Unless of course you
could read minds. (laughs)
149
00:05:42,976 --> 00:05:45,746
(audience laughs)
150
00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:48,015
(Cynthia laughs)
151
00:05:48,048 --> 00:05:50,484
- Well that would certainly
solve all my problems.
152
00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:52,453
- Yes, mine too.
153
00:05:52,486 --> 00:05:54,522
Um, Uncle Martin, why
don't you show Miss Parker
154
00:05:54,555 --> 00:05:57,157
your questionnaire
that you invented?
155
00:05:57,190 --> 00:05:58,726
- [Cynthia] Questionnaire?
156
00:05:58,759 --> 00:05:59,560
- Oh yes.
157
00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:01,061
Uh, yes, yes.
158
00:06:01,094 --> 00:06:03,497
Um, uh, it's just a sample
form that I, uh, made up
159
00:06:03,531 --> 00:06:05,499
to explore a
person's personality.
160
00:06:05,533 --> 00:06:07,468
I thought perhaps you could, um,
161
00:06:07,501 --> 00:06:08,936
use it in one of your surveys.
162
00:06:08,969 --> 00:06:11,505
- Well that's very kind of you.
163
00:06:13,006 --> 00:06:16,644
The Martin O'Hara
Personality Questionnaire.
164
00:06:16,677 --> 00:06:17,711
- Get ready.
165
00:06:17,745 --> 00:06:20,714
(audience laughs)
166
00:06:20,748 --> 00:06:24,184
- "Please state your preference
in the following categories:
167
00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:27,154
"literature, art,
hobbies, sports."
168
00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:32,159
(hypnotic music)
169
00:06:32,192 --> 00:06:36,196
I'm sorry, Mr. O'Hara, but
this wouldn't meet our needs.
170
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:37,197
- It wouldn't?
171
00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:38,298
- No.
172
00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:41,735
To be perfectly frank, it's
a little too superficial.
173
00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:43,170
You'd never get the real
information you were after
174
00:06:43,203 --> 00:06:46,474
with such simple,
direct questions.
175
00:06:46,507 --> 00:06:47,107
- [Martin] I wouldn't?
176
00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:48,942
- No.
177
00:06:48,976 --> 00:06:50,711
But thank you anyhow.
178
00:06:51,679 --> 00:06:54,014
- Thank you, Miss Parker.
179
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:54,682
- Bye.
180
00:06:58,552 --> 00:07:00,087
- Did you get what you wanted?
181
00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:01,121
- Everything.
182
00:07:01,154 --> 00:07:03,991
(audience laughs)
183
00:07:08,061 --> 00:07:10,498
(silly music)
184
00:07:16,904 --> 00:07:18,205
Kafka's The Child,
185
00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:22,910
Dostoevsky's Crime
and Punishment,
186
00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:26,847
Gibbon's The Decline and
Fall of the Roman Empire.
187
00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:31,051
In poetry, her taste runs to
Byron, Shelley, and Keats,
188
00:07:31,084 --> 00:07:33,854
and in music she's especially
fond of the three Bs,
189
00:07:33,887 --> 00:07:35,022
Bach, Beethoven, and--
190
00:07:35,055 --> 00:07:36,990
- Benny Goodman?
191
00:07:37,024 --> 00:07:38,559
- Brahms.
192
00:07:38,592 --> 00:07:39,760
- Oh.
193
00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:40,994
Yes, of course.
194
00:07:41,028 --> 00:07:43,196
Uncle Martin, you
are a real pal.
195
00:07:43,230 --> 00:07:44,598
I'm telling you that
196
00:07:44,632 --> 00:07:45,799
this is gonna be the
romance of the century.
197
00:07:45,833 --> 00:07:48,502
Now if it's an egghead
that she wants,
198
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:49,837
it's an egghead she's gonna get.
199
00:07:49,870 --> 00:07:52,906
(audience laughs)
200
00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:58,712
(lively classical music)
201
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:09,256
(Tim clears his throat)
202
00:08:09,289 --> 00:08:12,092
- "Hail to thee, blithe Spirit!
203
00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:14,628
"Bird thou never wert,
204
00:08:14,662 --> 00:08:17,798
"That from heaven, or near
it, Pourest thy full heart
205
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:21,635
"In profuse strains of
unpremeditated art."
206
00:08:27,775 --> 00:08:28,676
Oh.
207
00:08:28,709 --> 00:08:30,043
Uh, may I borrow your eraser?
208
00:08:30,077 --> 00:08:31,912
I'd like to make a
change in the story.
209
00:08:31,945 --> 00:08:32,746
- Of course.
210
00:08:32,780 --> 00:08:33,781
- Thank you.
211
00:08:34,848 --> 00:08:36,617
* Da da dee dee dee dee da da
212
00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:38,752
* Dum da da da dum da da
213
00:08:38,786 --> 00:08:40,754
* Da da da dee dee da da
214
00:08:40,788 --> 00:08:42,890
* Dum da dee dee dum ba dum
215
00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:43,724
Thank you.
216
00:08:43,757 --> 00:08:44,658
- Oh, Mr. O'Hara?
217
00:08:44,692 --> 00:08:46,159
- [Tim] Mm-hmm?
218
00:08:46,193 --> 00:08:47,928
- Wasn't that Beethoven's
First you were singing?
219
00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:48,762
- His Ninth.
220
00:08:48,796 --> 00:08:49,830
The first goes
221
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:50,664
* Dum
222
00:08:50,698 --> 00:08:51,799
* Da da dum
223
00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:54,668
* Da da da da da da da da
da da bum bum bum bum bum
224
00:08:54,702 --> 00:08:55,669
- That was so stupid of me.
225
00:08:55,703 --> 00:08:56,604
- Oh no, not really,
226
00:08:56,637 --> 00:08:58,606
it's just that I have
a passion for music.
227
00:08:58,639 --> 00:08:59,239
- You do?
228
00:08:59,272 --> 00:09:00,073
- Yes.
229
00:09:00,107 --> 00:09:00,941
- So do I.
230
00:09:01,775 --> 00:09:02,776
- You're kidding?
231
00:09:02,810 --> 00:09:03,611
- No.
232
00:09:03,644 --> 00:09:04,444
This is amazing.
233
00:09:04,477 --> 00:09:07,715
I would never have
thought that...
234
00:09:08,782 --> 00:09:10,317
- Yes?
235
00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:11,218
- Nothing.
236
00:09:11,251 --> 00:09:12,953
- Say, you know there's
a concert tonight
237
00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:14,121
at the Hollywood Bowl?
238
00:09:14,154 --> 00:09:14,955
- Oh there is?
239
00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:16,657
- Yes, and...
240
00:09:16,690 --> 00:09:18,626
Oh, that's right,
241
00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:20,661
you said you were busy
tonight, didn't you?
242
00:09:20,694 --> 00:09:21,294
- I did?
243
00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:22,730
- Yeah.
244
00:09:22,763 --> 00:09:25,098
- Well there's been
a change of plan.
245
00:09:25,132 --> 00:09:26,333
- Well then you can go.
246
00:09:26,366 --> 00:09:27,300
- I'd love to.
247
00:09:27,334 --> 00:09:28,535
- Oh that's wonderful.
248
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:32,339
Well then I'll, um, I'll pick
you up at eight then, Cynthia.
249
00:09:32,372 --> 00:09:34,708
- That'll be fine, Tim.
250
00:09:35,809 --> 00:09:37,611
* Da da dee dee dee dee da da
251
00:09:37,645 --> 00:09:39,880
* Dum dum dum dum ba dee dee
252
00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:43,150
(romantic piano music)
253
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:50,190
- Wasn't that concert marvelous?
254
00:09:50,223 --> 00:09:51,224
- Marvelous.
255
00:09:52,392 --> 00:09:54,327
- Oh that violin concerto,
256
00:09:54,361 --> 00:09:56,229
wasn't it beautiful?
257
00:09:57,264 --> 00:09:58,265
- Beautiful.
258
00:09:59,199 --> 00:10:01,835
- The scherzo was exquisite.
259
00:10:01,869 --> 00:10:02,703
- Scherzo.
260
00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:04,738
Uh, exquisite.
261
00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:07,908
- But when it comes to music,
262
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:10,410
I'm definitely partial to Bach.
263
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:14,848
I get goose pimples whenever I
hear his Goldberg Variations.
264
00:10:14,882 --> 00:10:16,216
How about you?
265
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:17,050
- Hmm?
266
00:10:17,084 --> 00:10:19,219
- [Cynthia] His
Goldberg Variations?
267
00:10:19,252 --> 00:10:21,388
- Well nobody writes
variations like Goldberg.
268
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:24,124
He's my favorite
variation writer.
269
00:10:24,157 --> 00:10:27,728
- Goldberg didn't write
the Goldberg Variations.
270
00:10:27,761 --> 00:10:29,162
Bach did.
271
00:10:29,196 --> 00:10:31,064
Goldberg was his pupil.
272
00:10:31,098 --> 00:10:32,165
- Yes, of course,
how silly of me.
273
00:10:32,199 --> 00:10:34,902
I guess when you know as
much about music as I do,
274
00:10:34,935 --> 00:10:37,004
you just have a tendency
to forget some things.
275
00:10:37,037 --> 00:10:40,340
Um, how do you feel
about, uh, Dostoevsky?
276
00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:44,912
- You like Dostoevksy?
277
00:10:44,945 --> 00:10:47,781
- Almost ask much
as I like Kafka.
278
00:10:49,249 --> 00:10:50,083
- Amazing.
279
00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:57,224
Hi, stranger.
280
00:10:57,257 --> 00:10:58,225
- Hi, Cynthia.
281
00:10:58,258 --> 00:10:59,392
What do you mean stranger?
282
00:10:59,426 --> 00:11:01,261
- I haven't seen you
since 11:30 last night.
283
00:11:01,294 --> 00:11:02,763
- Yeah, you're right.
284
00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:03,396
I guess we'll have
to get our offices
285
00:11:03,430 --> 00:11:04,865
moved closer together.
286
00:11:04,898 --> 00:11:06,800
- (laughs) Tim,
did you see this?
287
00:11:06,834 --> 00:11:09,202
The Salzburg String Quartet is
coming to town for one night.
288
00:11:09,236 --> 00:11:12,405
- Well hocus pocus,
two in the orchestra.
289
00:11:12,439 --> 00:11:14,007
- Tim, you're wonderful.
290
00:11:14,041 --> 00:11:16,309
- Well, who am I to
contradict a lady?
291
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:19,246
- It's amazing how
we agree on things.
292
00:11:19,279 --> 00:11:20,180
I never thought I'd meet a man
293
00:11:20,213 --> 00:11:23,183
who likes exactly what I like.
294
00:11:23,216 --> 00:11:24,251
- Well.
295
00:11:25,085 --> 00:11:25,919
- No, Tim,
296
00:11:26,854 --> 00:11:29,022
you're really exceptional.
297
00:11:30,123 --> 00:11:33,026
I don't claim that an
appreciation of music
298
00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:36,163
or art or literature
is the whole world,
299
00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:40,467
but it is a large
part of my world,
300
00:11:42,069 --> 00:11:45,705
and to be able to share it
with someone like you is
301
00:11:48,008 --> 00:11:50,010
just plain wonderful.
302
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:53,881
(passionate orchestral music)
303
00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:57,117
- But, but Cynthia.
304
00:11:57,150 --> 00:11:59,820
(worried music)
305
00:12:00,854 --> 00:12:01,922
- Call it off?
306
00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:03,223
- [Tim] Yes.
307
00:12:03,256 --> 00:12:04,391
- But I spent the whole
morning scouring bookstores
308
00:12:04,424 --> 00:12:05,993
for more of her favorite books.
309
00:12:06,026 --> 00:12:06,860
- I can't help
that, Uncle Martin.
310
00:12:06,894 --> 00:12:09,062
I can't go on deceiving
her any longer.
311
00:12:09,096 --> 00:12:10,330
- Are you going to tell her
the truth about yourself?
312
00:12:10,363 --> 00:12:11,899
- No, I can't do that.
313
00:12:11,932 --> 00:12:13,767
- Well if you're not
going to deceive her
314
00:12:13,801 --> 00:12:15,335
and you're not going to
tell her the truth...
315
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:17,004
- I can't tell her
316
00:12:17,037 --> 00:12:19,439
what a dirty, lowdown,
conniving rat I really am.
317
00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:22,175
It'd destroy her
faith in men forever.
318
00:12:22,209 --> 00:12:23,911
How'd I ever let
you talk me into it?
319
00:12:23,944 --> 00:12:25,345
- Me?
320
00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:27,815
You're the one who begged
me to read her mind.
321
00:12:27,848 --> 00:12:29,016
- Well you're the martian!
322
00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:31,084
You're supposed to
be smarter than I am!
323
00:12:31,118 --> 00:12:32,519
- I know.
324
00:12:32,552 --> 00:12:34,521
It's this living here on earth.
325
00:12:34,554 --> 00:12:36,890
Begins to rub off on one.
326
00:12:36,924 --> 00:12:38,491
- What am I gonna do?
327
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,294
- You could start an argument.
328
00:12:41,328 --> 00:12:44,064
You could tell her that you
don't like Toulouse-Lautrec.
329
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:46,333
She's very fond of
Toulouse-Lautrec.
330
00:12:46,366 --> 00:12:48,936
That would destroy her
relationship with you.
331
00:12:48,969 --> 00:12:50,037
- The way she feels
about me right now,
332
00:12:50,070 --> 00:12:53,073
it'd destroy her relationship
with Toulouse-Lautrec.
333
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:55,042
- Hmm, well she really
must've fallen for you.
334
00:12:55,075 --> 00:12:56,276
- Well that's what
makes me feel so bad.
335
00:12:56,309 --> 00:12:58,912
She thinks I'm her dream man.
336
00:13:00,180 --> 00:13:01,348
Wait a minute.
337
00:13:02,249 --> 00:13:03,083
That's it.
338
00:13:03,951 --> 00:13:05,218
Uncle Martin, look,
339
00:13:05,252 --> 00:13:06,854
all we have to do is
find her dream man!
340
00:13:06,887 --> 00:13:08,055
- What?
341
00:13:08,088 --> 00:13:09,857
- The fellow she thought
I was but I'm not.
342
00:13:09,890 --> 00:13:11,558
Look, for every girl
there's the right guy.
343
00:13:11,591 --> 00:13:13,526
All we have to do is find hers.
344
00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:14,862
- And how do we do that?
345
00:13:14,895 --> 00:13:16,396
- Your brain.
346
00:13:16,429 --> 00:13:17,464
All you have to do is run
around reading men's minds
347
00:13:17,497 --> 00:13:19,466
until you find the one
that corresponds with hers,
348
00:13:19,499 --> 00:13:20,300
then
(claps hands)
349
00:13:20,333 --> 00:13:21,168
bingo!
350
00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:22,369
- It may take weeks.
351
00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:25,105
- All right, we
better get started.
352
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:27,374
- When I get back to Mars,
they're never gonna believe me.
353
00:13:27,407 --> 00:13:29,376
They're never going
to believe me.
354
00:13:29,409 --> 00:13:32,079
(bemused music)
355
00:13:36,449 --> 00:13:39,452
(cheerful music)
356
00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:43,090
- How about Harry
Jordan in Distribution?
357
00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:44,925
Well Cynthia likes 'em
studious, you know.
358
00:13:44,958 --> 00:13:48,128
Now look at the way Harry's
concentrating on that paper.
359
00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:50,263
- He's concentrating on
that paper, all right.
360
00:13:50,297 --> 00:13:53,166
Flimflam on the 4th at
Hollywood Park could do it,
361
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:55,502
but maybe Hot Flash might
pass him in the stretch.
362
00:13:55,535 --> 00:13:57,570
- Forget Harry Jordan.
363
00:13:58,438 --> 00:14:00,273
How about Ed Ferguson?
364
00:14:02,275 --> 00:14:04,111
(strange music)
365
00:14:04,144 --> 00:14:04,978
Well?
366
00:14:06,113 --> 00:14:07,447
- "Bubbles LaRue
sure has a great act,
367
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,448
"but I'll bet she
has lots of problems.
368
00:14:08,481 --> 00:14:12,485
"I wonder how often
stripteasers catch a cold."
369
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:13,353
- Oh forget it.
370
00:14:13,386 --> 00:14:15,455
- I don't think we're
getting anywhere.
371
00:14:15,488 --> 00:14:18,258
Your colleagues are
decidedly lowbrow.
372
00:14:18,291 --> 00:14:20,027
- Yeah, I know.
373
00:14:20,060 --> 00:14:23,196
Hey, what about
the public library?
374
00:14:23,230 --> 00:14:24,998
- An excellent suggestion.
375
00:14:25,032 --> 00:14:27,134
Wait a minute, what's that?
376
00:14:27,167 --> 00:14:28,035
- What?
377
00:14:28,068 --> 00:14:31,071
* Da da da da da da
378
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:34,007
- Chopin.
379
00:14:34,041 --> 00:14:34,874
- Where?
380
00:14:35,608 --> 00:14:36,409
Where?
381
00:14:36,443 --> 00:14:37,377
- Sh sh sh!
382
00:14:39,146 --> 00:14:41,414
"She walks in beauty
like the night
383
00:14:41,448 --> 00:14:45,052
"Of cloudless climes
and starry skies,"
384
00:14:45,085 --> 00:14:46,119
Byron.
385
00:14:46,153 --> 00:14:47,154
- Byron who?
386
00:14:49,356 --> 00:14:50,190
Oh, Byron!
387
00:14:51,358 --> 00:14:52,559
- Yes.
388
00:14:52,592 --> 00:14:54,261
Byron.
389
00:14:54,294 --> 00:14:55,095
- Where?
390
00:14:55,128 --> 00:14:56,429
- That man over there.
391
00:14:56,463 --> 00:14:59,332
(puzzled music)
392
00:15:02,202 --> 00:15:03,003
- Bingo!
393
00:15:03,036 --> 00:15:04,204
- You know him?
394
00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:06,206
- Sure, that's Bill Fisher, the
knew assistant in personnel.
395
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:08,075
I didn't know he
was so cultured.
396
00:15:08,108 --> 00:15:09,042
Come on!
397
00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:11,544
(hopeful music)
398
00:15:12,645 --> 00:15:13,446
(knocking on the door)
399
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:15,115
- [Bill] Come in.
400
00:15:15,983 --> 00:15:17,150
- Hi, Bill, you got a second?
401
00:15:17,184 --> 00:15:18,018
- Sure.
402
00:15:19,186 --> 00:15:20,320
It's Tim O'Hara, isn't it?
403
00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:21,354
- Yes, that's right.
404
00:15:21,388 --> 00:15:22,355
I'd like to introduce my uncle.
405
00:15:22,389 --> 00:15:24,291
Martin O'Hara, Bill Fisher.
406
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:25,458
- Pleased to meet you, sir.
407
00:15:25,492 --> 00:15:27,160
- How do you do?
408
00:15:27,194 --> 00:15:28,128
- Bill, look.
409
00:15:28,161 --> 00:15:30,097
There's a little favor
I'd like to ask of you.
410
00:15:30,130 --> 00:15:31,564
I know how much you like music.
411
00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:33,100
- Now wait a minute.
412
00:15:33,133 --> 00:15:34,634
Now how did you know
that I like music?
413
00:15:34,667 --> 00:15:38,338
- Oh, well we heard you humming
that Chopin thing out there.
414
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:39,572
- Really?
415
00:15:39,606 --> 00:15:43,243
Well I had no idea I
was humming out loud.
416
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:46,246
- It's the acoustics.
417
00:15:46,279 --> 00:15:47,981
- Yes, yes.
418
00:15:48,015 --> 00:15:50,317
They're very good in
these old buildings.
419
00:15:50,350 --> 00:15:53,086
- Gee, I guess I'll
have to watch that.
420
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:55,088
What is it that I
can do for you, Bill?
421
00:15:55,122 --> 00:15:57,090
- Oh, well you see, there's
this concert tonight,
422
00:15:57,124 --> 00:15:59,526
the Salzburg String Quartet.
423
00:15:59,559 --> 00:16:00,760
Well you see, I have
two tickets to it,
424
00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:02,495
I'm afraid I'm not
gonna be able to go.
425
00:16:02,529 --> 00:16:05,232
Now there is this lovely
girl that you'd just--
426
00:16:05,265 --> 00:16:06,633
- Hold it.
427
00:16:06,666 --> 00:16:09,036
I also have two tickets
to tonight's concert,
428
00:16:09,069 --> 00:16:14,074
and I wouldn't want Angel
Face to miss it for the world.
429
00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:15,275
- Angel Face?
430
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:18,311
- Peggy Collins, the sweetest
little girl you've ever met.
431
00:16:18,345 --> 00:16:19,179
- Oh.
432
00:16:20,347 --> 00:16:22,282
Well, uh, thanks.
433
00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:24,184
Uh, sorry to bother you.
434
00:16:24,217 --> 00:16:25,118
- Well not at all.
435
00:16:25,152 --> 00:16:26,753
Thanks for thinking of me.
436
00:16:26,786 --> 00:16:28,555
It was nice to have
met you, Mr. Martin.
437
00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:31,358
(defeated music)
438
00:16:42,202 --> 00:16:43,803
- Wouldn't you know he'd
already have a girl.
439
00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:44,937
- It's a shame.
440
00:16:44,971 --> 00:16:46,606
He and Cynthia would've been
so right for each other.
441
00:16:46,639 --> 00:16:48,741
- Yeah, well try to
tell that to Angel Face.
442
00:16:48,775 --> 00:16:50,510
I better check and see if
I have any phone calls.
443
00:16:50,543 --> 00:16:51,378
- Hmm!
444
00:16:52,312 --> 00:16:53,546
- What's the matter?
445
00:16:53,580 --> 00:16:55,715
- What some people have
going on in their heads.
446
00:16:55,748 --> 00:17:00,153
* Scooby dooby dooby rebop rebop
447
00:17:00,187 --> 00:17:01,521
- That sounds like
the trumpet solo
448
00:17:01,554 --> 00:17:03,623
from Dizzy Gordon's
Honky Tonk Blues.
449
00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:05,192
It's a gas.
450
00:17:05,225 --> 00:17:06,393
- Well I knew it wasn't music.
451
00:17:06,426 --> 00:17:09,696
(audience laughs)
452
00:17:09,729 --> 00:17:10,563
Ugh!
453
00:17:11,564 --> 00:17:12,665
Ugh!
454
00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:14,467
Young lady, must you?
455
00:17:14,501 --> 00:17:17,237
(Martin squeals)
456
00:17:18,238 --> 00:17:20,707
(comical music)
457
00:17:24,411 --> 00:17:25,412
- [Bill] Angel Face!
458
00:17:25,445 --> 00:17:26,713
- [Peggy] Hi!
459
00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:29,649
(audience laughs)
460
00:17:29,682 --> 00:17:30,783
- Angel Face.
461
00:17:32,752 --> 00:17:34,654
- Oh, so this is
your new office.
462
00:17:34,687 --> 00:17:35,755
- Yes, you like it?
463
00:17:35,788 --> 00:17:38,091
- Oh I dig it, it's real kooky.
464
00:17:38,125 --> 00:17:40,293
- Oh, no, Peggy, you shouldn't
say things like that.
465
00:17:40,327 --> 00:17:41,494
It's so beneath you.
466
00:17:41,528 --> 00:17:42,662
- I'm sorry.
467
00:17:42,695 --> 00:17:43,530
I forgot.
468
00:17:45,298 --> 00:17:47,834
It's really, uh,
quite exquisite.
469
00:17:48,868 --> 00:17:50,637
- Well that's better.
470
00:17:50,670 --> 00:17:52,639
Now have I got a
surprise for you.
471
00:17:52,672 --> 00:17:54,874
Guess where we're going tonight?
472
00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:56,576
- The stock car races!
473
00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:59,612
Oh Bill, you finally broke
down and decided to take me.
474
00:17:59,646 --> 00:18:00,747
Oh you'll love it!
475
00:18:00,780 --> 00:18:03,116
Zoom zoom zoom zoom!
476
00:18:03,150 --> 00:18:04,617
Zoom zoom zoom zoom!
477
00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:08,721
- No, precious, not
the stock car races,
478
00:18:08,755 --> 00:18:09,589
a concert.
479
00:18:10,657 --> 00:18:11,458
- A concert?
480
00:18:11,491 --> 00:18:13,593
- [Bill] The Salzburg
String Quartet.
481
00:18:13,626 --> 00:18:15,428
- Oh. (laughs)
482
00:18:15,462 --> 00:18:16,263
- Say, Uncle
Martin, I was just--
483
00:18:16,296 --> 00:18:17,530
- Shh.
484
00:18:17,564 --> 00:18:18,865
- What's the matter?
485
00:18:18,898 --> 00:18:21,768
- I think we found our man.
486
00:18:21,801 --> 00:18:23,170
- Bill Fisher?
487
00:18:24,404 --> 00:18:26,173
What about Angel Face?
488
00:18:26,206 --> 00:18:27,607
- You know your
problem with Cynthia?
489
00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:28,708
- Yeah.
490
00:18:28,741 --> 00:18:31,144
- Well Bill's got the same
problem with Angel Face,
491
00:18:31,178 --> 00:18:33,313
and that may solve
all our problems.
492
00:18:33,346 --> 00:18:34,447
- How?
493
00:18:34,481 --> 00:18:36,383
- Just leave everything to me.
494
00:18:36,416 --> 00:18:37,550
At the concert tonight
495
00:18:37,584 --> 00:18:40,620
the quartet will be playing
a composition to the strings.
496
00:18:40,653 --> 00:18:44,557
I will be playing an exercise
for the levitation finger.
497
00:18:44,591 --> 00:18:47,294
(perky music)
498
00:18:48,828 --> 00:18:52,832
(orchestral instruments tuning)
499
00:18:58,271 --> 00:19:00,373
- Looks like a
marvelous program.
500
00:19:00,407 --> 00:19:02,909
I just know this is gonna
be a night to remember.
501
00:19:02,942 --> 00:19:04,477
- Yeah, so do I.
502
00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:08,548
(audience laughs)
503
00:19:15,455 --> 00:19:17,857
- Right in there, Angel Face.
504
00:19:28,935 --> 00:19:32,539
(graceful classical music)
505
00:19:36,809 --> 00:19:39,646
(audience laughs)
506
00:21:08,535 --> 00:21:09,969
- Oh, oh.
507
00:21:10,002 --> 00:21:10,803
Cynthia, I'm sorry, but I
have the wrong seat number.
508
00:21:10,837 --> 00:21:12,439
I'm afraid I'll
have to move down.
509
00:21:12,472 --> 00:21:14,807
You stay here and I'll
find my other seat.
510
00:21:14,841 --> 00:21:15,842
Bill, how are you?
511
00:21:15,875 --> 00:21:17,510
It's good to see you.
512
00:21:17,544 --> 00:21:18,878
(people shushing)
513
00:21:18,911 --> 00:21:19,812
- See you later.
514
00:21:19,846 --> 00:21:20,747
- See you after the show.
515
00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:23,716
(graceful classical music)
516
00:21:23,750 --> 00:21:26,586
(audience laughs)
517
00:22:04,691 --> 00:22:05,725
Uh, could you move
down one, please?
518
00:22:05,758 --> 00:22:07,794
(audience laughs)
519
00:22:07,827 --> 00:22:11,464
(lively classical music)
520
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:22,409
- Insane mix-ups.
521
00:22:22,442 --> 00:22:23,976
- I can't understand it.
522
00:22:24,010 --> 00:22:25,378
- I'd go straight
to the manager,
523
00:22:25,412 --> 00:22:26,879
only I don't want to
miss any of the concert.
524
00:22:26,913 --> 00:22:27,714
- Same here.
525
00:22:30,617 --> 00:22:33,553
- Haven't I seen you
someplace before?
526
00:22:33,586 --> 00:22:35,955
- Oh, the Los Angeles Sun.
527
00:22:35,988 --> 00:22:37,757
- Bill Fisher, personnel.
528
00:22:37,790 --> 00:22:39,726
- Cynthia Parker,
market research.
529
00:22:39,759 --> 00:22:40,860
- Well it certainly
is a small world.
530
00:22:40,893 --> 00:22:42,094
- (laughs) Yes.
531
00:22:42,128 --> 00:22:43,563
- Say, do you come to
the concerts often?
532
00:22:43,596 --> 00:22:44,764
- Constantly.
533
00:22:44,797 --> 00:22:47,667
- I'm really looking forward
to the Salzburg String Quartet.
534
00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:48,668
I was supposed to
see them in Europe
535
00:22:48,701 --> 00:22:50,937
on a student tour in 1958,
536
00:22:50,970 --> 00:22:54,140
only I literally
missed the boat.
537
00:22:54,173 --> 00:22:55,742
- You were the one.
538
00:22:57,076 --> 00:22:58,811
- [Bill] You mean you
were on that tour?
539
00:22:58,845 --> 00:22:59,746
- Yes.
540
00:22:59,779 --> 00:23:01,681
Salzburg, Vienna, Paris.
541
00:23:01,714 --> 00:23:03,616
- Well this is wonderful!
(Cynthia laughs)
542
00:23:03,650 --> 00:23:04,951
Listen, you've got to
tell me all about it.
543
00:23:04,984 --> 00:23:05,818
What was it like?
544
00:23:05,852 --> 00:23:08,455
- Oh it was marvelous.
545
00:23:08,488 --> 00:23:09,556
To begin with,
546
00:23:09,589 --> 00:23:11,891
in Salzburg we stayed at
the funniest little chalet.
547
00:23:11,924 --> 00:23:13,560
You would've loved it. (laughs)
548
00:23:13,593 --> 00:23:16,896
(elegant classical music)
549
00:23:30,743 --> 00:23:32,111
- Hey Uncle Martin,
550
00:23:32,144 --> 00:23:33,813
do you remember about
a month ago when, uh,
551
00:23:33,846 --> 00:23:35,047
when you pulled that
little trick at the concert
552
00:23:35,081 --> 00:23:37,049
to get Cynthia
and Bill together?
553
00:23:37,083 --> 00:23:37,950
- Yeah.
554
00:23:37,984 --> 00:23:39,018
- Listen to this.
555
00:23:39,051 --> 00:23:40,553
"After the wedding the
bride and groom will leave
556
00:23:40,587 --> 00:23:42,655
"for a two-week
honeymoon in Bermuda."
557
00:23:42,689 --> 00:23:44,190
Gee, it's too bad I
had to work today.
558
00:23:44,223 --> 00:23:45,825
I was supposed to be best man.
559
00:23:45,858 --> 00:23:46,993
- Did Peggy go to the wedding?
560
00:23:47,026 --> 00:23:47,927
- [Tim] Mm-hmm.
561
00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:49,061
She was one of the bridesmaids.
562
00:23:49,095 --> 00:23:51,464
- I hope she hasn't been too
shaken up by all of this.
563
00:23:51,498 --> 00:23:52,699
- Are you kidding?
564
00:23:52,732 --> 00:23:53,933
We've been having
a ball together,
565
00:23:53,966 --> 00:23:55,968
going to stock car
races, surfboarding,
566
00:23:56,002 --> 00:23:57,904
nightclubs, jazz joints.
567
00:23:57,937 --> 00:23:59,739
- That's the Tim O'Hara I know.
568
00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:00,607
- Yeah.
569
00:24:02,041 --> 00:24:03,676
Well after all that Kafka,
Brahms, and Beethoven,
570
00:24:03,710 --> 00:24:05,612
you know, a guy
needs a little fun.
571
00:24:05,645 --> 00:24:06,813
(knocking on the door)
572
00:24:06,846 --> 00:24:08,047
That must be Peggy.
573
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:09,148
We have a date.
574
00:24:10,282 --> 00:24:12,118
- I'll just make myself scarce.
575
00:24:12,151 --> 00:24:15,454
(lighthearted music)
576
00:24:18,758 --> 00:24:19,992
- [Tim] Hi, Kitten.
577
00:24:20,026 --> 00:24:20,860
- Hi, Muscles.
578
00:24:20,893 --> 00:24:21,728
- Mm.
579
00:24:22,829 --> 00:24:23,663
Mm mm!
580
00:24:24,631 --> 00:24:25,231
How was the wedding?
581
00:24:25,264 --> 00:24:27,066
- Oh, the greatest.
582
00:24:27,099 --> 00:24:29,168
You never saw
anything so beautiful.
583
00:24:29,201 --> 00:24:30,737
Everybody cried.
584
00:24:32,004 --> 00:24:33,072
Oh and guess what?
585
00:24:33,105 --> 00:24:34,206
- What's that?
586
00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:36,075
- I caught the bridal bouquet.
587
00:24:36,108 --> 00:24:37,176
- Oh, isn't that marvelous?
588
00:24:37,209 --> 00:24:38,911
That means something,
doesn't it?
589
00:24:38,945 --> 00:24:40,913
- Well of course.
590
00:24:40,947 --> 00:24:43,616
It means I'm going to be
the next one to be married.
591
00:24:43,650 --> 00:24:44,917
- Oh. (laughs)
(Peggy laughs)
592
00:24:44,951 --> 00:24:47,053
* Hmm dee da da
593
00:24:47,086 --> 00:24:48,988
* Dee da da da
594
00:24:49,021 --> 00:24:52,725
* Dee da da da da da da
595
00:24:52,759 --> 00:24:55,628
* Da da da
596
00:24:55,662 --> 00:24:56,596
- Uncle Martin.
597
00:24:56,629 --> 00:24:59,298
("Here Comes the Bride")
598
00:24:59,331 --> 00:25:00,533
Uncle Martin.
599
00:25:00,567 --> 00:25:03,102
(resolute music)
600
00:25:04,136 --> 00:25:06,939
(comical music)
40693
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