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a film by Nikos Panayotopoulos

What's that crazy woman doing, man?

Some cannon you got there, man!

There's nothing so sweet as a dead man's dick.

Who are you? l've seen you before somewhere.

Me?

Coffee? lced?

l can even hear a single hair falling.

l'm drunk, Sir.

Don't talk to guys who're drunk.

When l sober up, l'll get so drunk again...

Not here... somewhere else.

Here everything's by the clock.

lt's a bus station. That's why.

Understand?

This fucking heat wave is gonna kill us.

He fell asleep.

Must be Albanian.

He's from here. He's Greek.

That's what l reckon too. Albanian.

Hey! Sleepy!

This heat will finish us off. l'm a sick man.

Give me a call. You're out again.

l'm sick of talking to the machine.

All the faggots who hang with potheads pay them big money.

You plan to stick to me like a leech?

Get off my back, buddy.

There's a good boy.

l don't get it.

OK, man. Give it a rest.

Especially guys like you, you jerk, who fuck around...

Half a Euro, man.

What have I done to you and you've stopped Ioving me.

You don't Iove me, you don't Iove me.

And you keep spending aII your nights in seedy bars...

Making eyes at other guys. You don't Iove me!

What have I done to you and you don't Iove me.

You don't Iove me, you don't Iove me.

And you keep hanging out in seedy bars...

Kissing other guys. You don't Iove me.

l haven't seen you before.

Are you Albanian? What are you?

l'm looking for a job.

What job?

Not very talkative are you?

You don't like chit-chat.

Now that's a job.

High-class.

Showing off on your moped with your crash helmet...

with everything.

Pretty good, huh?

l FUCK lADlES-COUPlES FREE

Well if it isn't the mute!

Still haven't found a job?

Pizzas are a good job but you must have qualifications.

-like what? -He speaks! You're no mute!

What qualifications?

look... you've got to be able to drive a moped.

l drive a moped.

Yeah, but you've also got to know the streets.

lf you don't know the streets, how will you deliver the pizza?

You're here.

What are you, man? Albanian?

Are you deaf? A deaf-mute?

You look more like a faggot to me.

Whores!

listen to this! She took off her clothes and made love.

Don't interrupt!

l caught her! With my own eyes l caught her!

Don't you have a husband? l said to her once.

lt's my job doing this job, she said to me. Get it?

Don't interrupt!

You won't see a thing.

But women spot a horny guy from miles away.

Women with beaked noses can't get enough of it.

Women who tap their heels nervously like it rough.

Women with mustaches have the devil inside them.

Don't interrupt!

You hang out here too, man?

lf you can carry the ice box, l can put you up in my place.

Don't ask why. Say l've taken a liking to you.

What are you looking at me for? You don't have a better choice.

looks like l was wrong. You're no faggot.

You look more like a geek to me.

Here. Make yourself comfy on this cardboard.

The essentiaI ingredient in my happiness...

that's you...

l forgot to tell you. The pad doesn't have electricity.

lf you want to see your nose, press this button every 1 0''...

and take advantage of the building's electricity.

At night all panties look black.

You're not one for conversation, right?

l've psychoanalyzed you.

l can psychoanalyze the air you breathe.

See me? l've even been in fistfights with dead men.

Heyden?

There's a Heyden Street?

That's German, you geek!

Did they sell you a map of Germany, you jerk?

look lively!

Move it, geek! You move like a tortoise.

Piraeus Street.

Here.

Athinas Street.

Here.

When l become rich, l'll hire you to press the button...

so l can read the funerals in the paper all night.

Old habits never die. You know that, don't you?

lt's the soul that departs.

You're telling me!

Motherfuckers! l know them inside out.

The dying and the dead that was my circle.

l worked in a funeral home... for years.

Been through all the posts. l've washed half of Athens.

By the time l was through the dead were bonbons.

l can tell you stories that will blow your mind.

l was still a kid and helping them wash that actress...

what was her name?

When she performed in ancient theaters even the stones wept.

But real masculine looking. Had a clitoris...

you were too scared to approach.

l'd make up the dead so they looked like infants.

Then l was demoted to corpses. Washing, embalming, casket.

l got a hernia from lugging all those caskets.

l've worn out any number of shoes waiting in hospitals...

l know all the rip-offs... legal and illegal.

long life to us!

The dead need love. l love the dead.

They provided me with a living.

My whole life.

That's some dick you've got there, man!

l've never seen such a thing!

Way to go, geek! So how big is it anyway?

Hell bent you were! Your feet hurt. Fine!

Didn't l rub them for you every afternoon?

Did you want for anything? But you were hell bent!

l'm going to cook stuffed vine leaves for Angelos.

You were hell bent to die.

So are you cooking them for him now? ls Angelos eating them?

Hell bent you were!

At some point we're all kicking the bucket.

The terrible thing about death is you don't know you're dead.

About death itself l've nothing to tell you.

About the dead, ask me anything you like.

The dead have three layers:

lean tissue, fat and on top of that skin.

All those who believe that the nails, hair and balls...

of those who kick the bucket keep growing watch too much TV.

Hey, dummy!

D'you believe in miracles?

Well, cross yourself. There's been a miracle.

l got you a job in a pizza place.

Delivery!

Are you the man or what! Delivery, boy!

What have I done to you and you've stopped Ioving me...

You don't Iove me, You don't Iove me.

And you keep spending aII your nights in seedy bars...

You don't taIk to me. You don't taIk to me.

You know Kolokotronis Street?

She took off with the other guy and was gone three years.

When l saw her one day l turn to her and say:

Nobody helped me, not even the air l breathe.

But for you, you can have it all. l give you everything.

You have nothing, she says, so what are you giving me?

OK, l tell her, what does it matter that l have nothing.

My everything is nothing.

The other guy who had everything gave you nothing.

Doesn't it boil down to the same thing?

They're all rotten!

What do you know? Vesuvius is awake!

Why didn't you wake me, Superman?

OK, don't say a word, no need to.

Some fucking clarinets!

What does ''delivery'' mean?

Open the dictionary and let's see.

Hey! Where are you going? Hang on and let's find out!

Delivery, distribution, liberation, childbirth...

Natural childbirth...

Baby!

This one's for you.

You're late and it got cold.

Don't forget to lock up and bolt the door.

You didn't bring any pizza for us to eat?

Now you're working...

you've got to pay rent.

l'm not your Dad to put you up for free...

nor your uncle.

lf l died l'd be free of this cough.

But unfortunately no one dies before his time.

Vesuvius...

You're naive, man, you know that?

l'm naive but you lied.

Where are you going? Tell me! Where are you going?

Anywhere l like!

Come here, goddammit!

-let go of my clothes! -No, l won't!

-l want to get dressed and go. -You listen to me first!

-let go! -You're not going anywhere!

-let go! -Come here, goddammit!

-With Chrysoula? Chrysoula? -Are you kidding? Chrysoula?

Yeah, right! When you saw her you acted like a jerk!

-Who acted like a jerk? -You did!

Not my hair! let go of my hair! Goddammit!

You had to go digging things up and what did you get out of it?

-l found out you were lying. -l was lying?

-Yes you! -You're naive!

-l'm naive? -Did you ever wonder...

why that bimbo said those things to you?

-You lied! -l'll tell you why!

She wants to act like she's your friend. OK, she says...

Yes, l went with your boyfriend but l didn't enjoy it one bit!

-ls that so? -Yes.

-So then it happened! -No, it didn't happen!

-Really? Well, l'm leaving. -Where are you going?

-Wherever l like. -Come here goddammit!

Come here! l'm talking to you. Can't a guy fucking talk?

-Where are you going? -Wherever.

-That's the name of a place? -Yes it is!

-Tell me! l'm talking to you! -So long as l don't see you!

There's a place called ''wherever''?

Goddammit! Come here!

let go of me!

Come here! l'm talking to you goddammit!

Don't forget to lock up and bolt the door.

Don't you ever stop staring at me?

You're a real strange one, you know that?

The boss is right calling you Superman!

You don't talk?

l like it that you don't talk.

Where are you from?

Fine if you don't want to tell me, don't.

l'm from Xanthe. Even though the boss calls me ''Eskimo''.

D'you think l look like an Eskimo?

l worked in the tobacco fields.

lf the tobacco leaves have the color of quince wine...

that's a good crop. You should know that.

A guy who sold sheets and nighties in the villages...

brought me down to Athens.

Everything else is just details.

You could say l came down to seek my fortune.

l like it that you don't say much.

lt means you know how to listen.

Maybe one day l'll tell you the story of my life...

but now l'm in a hurry.

With a guitar Iike Che Guevara...

And shoes with wingtips...

My coat... from my viIIage...

I took off one rainy night.

I feIt a sadness for the emptiness...

That's how the rain found me...

And through the pane, a bIurry mane...

the city promising me something for something...

I disappeared...

Down a road I aIways took...

l disappeared...

Since everything is in flux...

I disappeared...

In two eyes that promised me forever...

I disappeared...

CaII it: DeIivery!

lock up and bolt the door.

You're a regular Peeping Tom, aren't you?

like my tits? Or d'you like them small?

l like yours!

Because some guys go for tits that are like fried eggs.

Will you take me for a ride on the moped?

Step on it, Superman! You're moving like a tortoise!

Where did you pick up the Eskimo, man?

You went to the North Pole for ice cubes?

Once you'd hear people saying: l'm hungry.

You'd hear that all the time. Now they say: l'm bored.

Anywhere you look that's what you hear.

You tell me when were they happier?

What d'you think?

lf l wasn't getting ready to die l'd say: never.

Vesuvius.

But since any time now l'll be history, l say: then.

Everyone's got troubles.

So what does he want? That l should say l'm sorry l exist?

He's bled me dry!

He's made me sick of love. Just the sight of couples kissing...

-makes me want to throw up! -Pal! Want a watch dirt cheap?

Fuck off!

God is God. That's my explanation.

Not talking is all he knows.

-Who? God? -Who else? Me?

Did they all leave?

You don't know how to dance?

What?

Dancing. You don't know how to dance? Dance?

You dropped out of the sky or what?

You really don't look like Superman.

Know who you look like?

Gagarin!

You've got an enormous dick!

lt's dead.

lt's not dead. lt's sleeping.

Since it's not moving, it's dead.

lf it's dead then how come it's moving its ears?

lt's moving its ears because the flies bother it.

lt's moving its ears because it's bored...

not moving all this time.

lf it's bored why doesn't it leave?

Well it doesn't leave because it's dead.

After fucking, l get this sad feeling.

How about you?

l'll give myself a shot and l'll feel better.

What shot?

A shot the doctor prescribed.

What's this? What's this?

l don't want women in my house.

l pay for house.

l don't care. l don't want women in my house.

lf you don't like it, get out.

Keep an eye on her.

Christ!

l could kill you!

Who are they, man? Junkies?

Who are you, man?

Come here, man! Come here!

Move it!

Bring him over here!

Get his l.D. His l.D.

Who's the other guy, you prick?

You nailed the one so the other could get away?

Talk! Who is it?

l don't know! l told you all l know.

You'll die, you motherfucker!

Who's the other guy?

You're dead, man!

let him have it!

Talk!

l always cooperate. Don't l cooperate?

You're history, man!

Who is it?

l don't know. l swear on my life!

Talk! Talk!

You're dead!

Who's the other guy?

Don't forget to lock up and bolt the door.

The thieves have become more than the residents.

Don't get ready. l'm not coming with you.

You've got a huge dick...

but your buddies aren't the best.

Could you spare 5 Euros?

l take substances.

Real degrading, huh?

l steal from my own self so l can get my dose.

But you see Vulbegal don't grow on trees.

Thanks, pizza boy!

l'll remember you in my will.

You never take off your crash helmet?

You fuck with your crash helmet?

Go on. Get inside and take a look.

l hope it's vegetarian.

l'm sick of all the meat in here.

HeIIo, If you can, heIp us because my Dad is in hospitaI..

we don't have bread to eat and there are 5 of us kids.

My name is VassiIis. Thank you.

There are 50 of us kids.

The pizza.

Good night.

HELP WANTED BO Y WITH MOPED

Hey! Aren't you the priest's son?

What are you looking at? The Chinaman?

You watch out for the Chinaman.

Watch out for him?

l could burn him alive.

Hi there, pizza stud!

Today...

l'll tell you the story...

of my life.

Since you're listening. listen to this.

l refuse to have kids if l can't give them everything.

People who have kids and then abandon them to their fate...

-bother me. -Crap.

-What crap? -What you're saying is crap.

ln the final analysis you don't want kids.

No one knows why they bring kids into this world.

You either have kids or you don't.

Those who sit and analyze and talk about it...

are wasting their time.

That's life! Having kids.

-That's your life you mean. -That's life generally.

Your life isn't life generally.

Beat it.

l said beat it.

Scram!

Fuck your Albania, fuck your Russia, fuck your Pakistan.

l said beat it, motherfucker!

This area is off limits.

Hey geek.

l'm dying.

About death itself l've nothing to tell you.

About the dead, ask me anything you like.

The dead have three layers.

The lean tissue...

Fat...

and on top of that the skin.

All those who believe that the hair, nails and balls...

of those who kick the bucket keep growing watch too much TV.

How's it going?

Same place as always.

Are you happy?

With what?

With life.

With life yes. With my life no.

What are you laughing for?

l laugh. That's why l'll live long.

l'm not sleeping. l'm thinking of my little life.

Women with short hair blow your mind.

Women with green eyes are only out for your money.

Women who bite their nails are looking to get married.

Don't interrupt me!

Women who look deep into your eyes you should be scared of.

Women who talk to you right away have secrets.

Women who talk all the time are sad.

Buddy! D'you want to get high?

No he doesn't, man, 'cos he is already.

What did he want?

To push pills.

Who pushes pills to you?

Know who l got high with the first time?

-With the pill pusher. -With a monk.

He popped pills like they were chick-peas.

He left the Holy Mountain, shaved his beard and his head..

and roamed around Omonia Square all day screaming:

God split!

And who pushed pills to the monk?

Boy are you a dimwit!

lt was God. OK?

Ali, Hussein, lbrahim, Mohammed, Suleiman...

Ali, Hussein, lbrahim, Karim, Mohammed, Suleiman...

That's what they do. When it's time for prayer...

no matter where they are they pray.

What prayer, man?

Haven't you see him outside movie theaters?

l'm from Serbia, my parents killed, l very hungry...

l thank Christ... Big lies! What Christ?

Watch out you jerk! Don't fuck with Christ!

Come on, Suleiman. Grab it.

Come on. We're leaving.

Where did you find this jerk? He can't even say his name.

Do l know? Probably escaped from some mental hospital.

Come on Suleiman, you jerk.

l find a button.

l bend down, l pick it up. l put it in my pocket.

l find a bobby pin.

l bend down, l pick it up. l put it in my pocket.

l find a smudged piece of paper.

l bend down, l pick it up. l put it in my pocket.

God is everywhere.

l find a glove... a comb.

God is everywhere.

My good lady, instead of lighting a candle...

buy a pack of tissues.

There was no way he'd stick a needle in himself.

Nor did he snort. He was afraid l might get AlDS.

He just took that shit... what do they call it... Vulbegal...

so he could endure the panhandling.

l used to snort then.

Tassos was afraid of snorting.

Either you stop or we break up.

We're supposed to be human beings!

My incurabIe Iove...

and my great sorrow...

A beautifuI story...

my Iife's finaIe.

G AG ARIN

So tell me where will you take me when the light turns green?

To paradise.

A hand. You'll probably have to give him something.

Do they have to stick their hand in your face, goddammit!

So, where did you say you were taking me?

Translated by Elly Petrides Subtitled by Videopress S.A.

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