Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

(Rich) Let me tell you a little something

I've learned over the years, pal-y.

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

Sometimes it might seem like life and death

out there on the diamond, but when it comes right down to it,

don't blame the game.

Your happiness is up to you.

All right, we got to take a break at the top of the hour

for the news, but I'll be back in six minutes

with more sports on the fly with me, Rich Cookson, KQRY.

And we're out.

- Great show, Dad. - Thank you, sweetheart.

But do you think maybe you're just a little bit biased?

Just because I'm your daughter doesn't mean

I can't be a fan, too.

I suppose you're right.

Besides, I can use all the fans I can get.

The ratings are in for this quarter,

and you're on top again.

You won?

It's not exactly a contest, honey.

Don't listen to your dad, Ariel.

Radio is a contest, and your dad is a winner.

I'm gonna be just like him when I'm older.

We'll talk about this later.

Come on. We've only got three minutes,

and I need the East Coast scores.

This is Ariel Cookson, reporting to you live.

(woman) Ariel, why can't I find a guy like your Jonathan?

You know what you should do?

You should bring him on the show.

On--on my show?

(woman) He could take some calls,

maybe tell the rest of us what we're doing wrong.

We all know you're a relationship expert, Ariel.

But I'd like to hear it from your other half.

(Ariel) Okay, well, thank you so much for your call.

That's all the time we have left for today.

And I've just been reminded

about our special live remote tomorrow.

2:00 p.m. at the ballroom of the Grand Vista Hotel downtown,

where you'll be able to meet me in person

and ask questions live on the air.

Hope to see you all there.

In the meantime, coming up next on KQRY,

we have Straight Talk with Bethany,

so stay tuned.

Thank you for listening. This has been

Romantically Speaking with Ariel Cookson,

and as my father used to say,

"Your happiness is up to you."

And we're out.

- Great show, kid. - Oh, thank you.

I did not think that last caller was going to give up.

You're the relationship expert.

Can't blame your audience for wanting to know how you do it.

I'm here, I'm here.

Martin, where's my rewrites?

Uh, it's coming.

And my coffee.

Right.

- Bethany. - Ariel.

Heard your show on the way over.

Charming as always.

Oh, thank you.

- Have a good show. - Thanks. I will.

- Bye, kiddo. - Bye.

He was a legend,

Your dad.

- It was the end of an era. - He was the best.

Well, you're no slouch yourself.

- Oh, thanks. - No, I listened

to your show today. It was good.

- But? - There's no "but."

- Just a maybe. - "Maybe" what?

Tomorrow's the live broadcast at the Grand.

Why don't you bring Jonathan?

Introduce him in the audience.

You know, get some buzz happening.

Look, the station's numbers are down across the board.

We need this,

and, if I'm being completely honest,

you do too.

Just think about it.

Hmm.

Play your cards right, you and Jonathan might become

the Brad and Angelina of local radio.

What if he says no? I mean, Eric made it

very clear he wasn't just suggesting I bring Jonathan.

It was basically an order.

Just stop worrying.

You're getting yourself all worked up

about this for nothing.

- What--get away. - Hey!

Putting a crib together is hungry work, you know?

I just--I hope you're right.

My wife is always right.

I know this because she tells me so.

- Every day.

- What are we talking about? - Ariel is finally

going to introduce Jonathan to the audience

at her show tomorrow.

- Your Jonathan? - What's so surprising

- about that? - Nothing. It's just...

- The couple of dozen times

I've hung out with the guy,

he never really struck me

as the type of guy who enjoys making

- public appearances. - Obviously.

So he's gonna do whatever he can

to make her happy.

I'll believe it when I see it.

Good luck with that.

- Right, Nathan? - Right.

What are we talking about?

Ariel's show tomorrow.

Oh, I can't wait.

- I bet. - Cleared my whole schedule

- for the afternoon. - We wouldn't miss it

for the world.

Dave is so excited, he's decided to take

the day off work.

We'll be in the front row cheering you on.

Oh, you guys. You're the best.

- You make me feel better. - Oh!

- Oh? - Oh, no.

- No, no, no, no. - Baby, is it time? Is it time?

- No, no, no, no, no, no, wait. - Okay, listen.

- I'm gonna call the-- - I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.

I just--

I had a sudden craving for chocolate pudding.

Oh, that's normal.

On spinach.

Okay.

What do I do with these?

So no date tonight?

No. Vanessa bailed on me.

I thought you broke up with her?

Uh, that was a different Vanessa.

Oh, right, right, right. The one that you brought

to Dave's birthday party.

I-I thought she broke up with you.

She did. This is a new Vanessa.

What about you?

Where's your boyfriend, Jonathan

and his famous chocolate torte?

That's a very good question,

- Please leave a message.

Uh, hey, it's me. Uh, just wondering where you were.

Dinner's almost ready, so hurry.

Everybody's waiting for your chocolate torte.

Okay, see you soon.

- He's probably parking. - Probably.

Yeah.

It's a nice night.

Mm-hmm.

Look, maybe he just got caught up at work

and forgot to call.

And turned his phone off?

And that is why you are my best friend.

Okay. Call me if you need me.

(woman) You have no new messages.

Jonathan?

- Hi. - What are you doing?

(Jonathan) We waited over an hour for you up there.

I brought the torte.

I don't care about the stupid torte, Jonathan.

I want to know why you're just sitting in your car

instead of having dinner with us.

Well, that's the thing, really.

(Jonathan) This isn't my torte.

- What? - You know how you always

tell people on the radio that I make this great

chocolate torte from scratch?

Okay. So what does that have to do with--

I didn't make the torte.

I've never made the torte.

- Never? - Never.

What about the one for your birthday?

Especially not that one.

So why did he lie about it?

He said he had to. He said that--

When you talk about me on your radio show,

you make it sound like I'm Superman.

Great tennis player, amazing chef, fantastic dancer.

I mean, okay, so maybe I exaggerate a little bit,

and, you know, it's only because I love you.

You love the idea of me.

You have this picture of the perfect guy in your head.

And sooner or later, I'm gonna let you down.

I just think sooner's probably better than later.

And then he broke up with me.

Oh, I'm sorry, A.

But who knows? Maybe you'll get back together.

He's just been assigned a new project in South Africa.

He lives tomorrow for 12 months in Johannesburg.

Well, I'm almost done with this layout.

If you want, I can stop by that Chinese place on the corner

and pick up their famous "break-up" dumplings.

Oh, thank you, no. I'm okay.

I have to prep for tomorrow's show anyways.

I don't know what I'm gonna tell Eric.

Some relationship specialist I am.

All right, well, if you want, I'm just a phone call away.

- Like always. - Bye.

(Ariel) Good night.

Ah.

Showtime, Ms. Cookson.

- Thanks, Kenny. - Good luck.

Or, I guess they say break a leg.

Thank you.

There you are!

I've been looking all over for you.

- I was just, um-- - Let's go, let's go.

The place is filling up already.

You got a lot of fans in there.

Now, before airtime, I'll go on.

Welcome everyone, say a few words,

then I'll introduce you.

You'll come through the curtains.

- Where's Jonathan? - Well, he's--

What does he look like? I'll just go and get him.

The thing is, Eric, if you just--

if you let me explain something--

Sir, sir. I'm sorry to interrupt.

But Carl is having a problem with the thing.

Oh, no. We don't have time for problems.

We go live in six minutes.

- Good luck in there. - Thank you.

Looks like a full house.

Oh, you made it.

Like I'd miss my best friend's first live stage appearance.

All those people out there watching me.

Hey, you're gonna do fine, okay?

Just close your eyes and..

Pretend you're at the studio.

Whew.

Good thing I brought these.

Break-up dumplings.

Afternoon, folks, I'd like to welcome you all here today.

My name is Eric Damon; I'm the station manager here at KQRY.

It might be a little cold by now,

but we can heat them up after the show.

And now without further ado, please welcome the host...

You are the best.

of Romantically Speaking, Ariel Cookson.

Aw.

Well. And as a special bonus surprise,

You all heard her talk about him,

now you actually get to meet him,

her perfect man, Jonathan.

No.

No. No, no, no. Okay.

(Eric) Over here, Jonathan.

That's not Jonathan.

Hi, everybody.

I think I should explain something.

Here we go. We're live in five,

four, three, two, one.

- And now it's time for... - Oh, sure.

- Romantically Speaking. - Awkward.

the show that takes an honest look at relationships

and how you can get your heart back on track.

- Here's your host... - Whoo.

Relationship expert Ariel Cookson.

Good afternoon. As always, I want to thank you

for joining us on Romantically Speaking on KQRY.

We're coming to you live from the beautiful ballroom

of the glamorous Grand Vista Hotel...

Ladies, you're missing the show.

Don't you want to talk to Ariel?

We can call her any time.

It's not every day we get to meet a perfect man

like you, Jonathan.

Right. Well, the, uh, the thing is

- I'm not-- - We think you're perfect.

- Isn't that something? - Yeah.

(Ariel) Now, let's take some questions

from our live audience.

Anybody have a question about a relationship concern?

Let's see if I can help.

Could I get this delivered, please?

Hello, Ariel. Love your show.

- Thank you very much. - Hello?

(woman) I was wondering if you could tell us a story about

your relationship with Jonathan and how he helps you?

How he helps me?

Okay. Well.

Wow, that's a really good question.

How does he help me?

Well, how doesn't he help me?

- Aw.

Uh, could you give us a specific example maybe?

Um...

I had a really rough day yesterday,

and Jonathan was very helpful.

He brought me dumplings from my favorite restaurant,

and we talked and talked into the night.

- Aw. - Dumplings?

- Oh, that's so sensitive. - Oh!

- Thank you, Ariel. - Thank you.

Upset? No, I am not upset.

I'm furious.

Why can't I have a live remote?

I'm sorry, Bethany, but your show just isn't a good fit

for the afternoon brunch audience.

And that's all the time we have left for today.

We'll discuss this later. I have to go.

What? Wha--Eric?

(Ariel) It has been really fun meeting so many

of my wonderful listeners in person

here at the Grand Vista Hotel.

I want to thank you for sharing your stories with us.

Straight Talk with Bethany is coming up next on KQRY.

This is Ariel Cookson saying good-bye for now,

and as my father used to say...

(all) "Your happiness is up to you."

And we're out.

Thank you guys so much.

Bye.

So, that guy wasn't really Jonathan?

It's none of our business, okay?

Yeah, but when she introduced the guy as--

Zip it, kid.

- Oh, I love your show. - Ariel, I love you.

Ariel, can I get a quick picture?

Oh, um, actually I really have to go.

I'm so sorry.

Thank you guys for coming. I'm so sorry.

- I'm waiting for someone. - Hi. Come on, let's go.

- Hi. Oh! - Hi. So,

what was that all about?

I know, I know. I just--I--

Didn't I tell you?

Didn't I tell you? They loved you two together.

Okay, Eric, we really need to talk about something.

You're right, we do. We need to talk about

what other publicity opportunities we can set up

for the two of you.

- Jonathan, they loved you. - Jonathan?

I know. Crazy, right?

Well, we'll let you guys discuss business.

- Great show, Ariel. - Thank you.

- You too, Jonathan.

- Wait a minute. - Babe, I think Jonathan

could get a ride home from his girlfriend?

- No, but I-- - Yeah, right, honey?

- Yeah. - Okay, wait.

- I don't understand how-- - Babe, we should just go.

- Come on. - I don't get it.

We don't get the numbers until tomorrow,

but if the phone calls we were getting at the station

mean anything, you two were a hit.

- Congratulations. - Thank you.

- Yep. - Oh,

let's get out of here, please.

Okay.

Oh, I can't believe I just did that.

- Did what? - I just lied to that entire

audience. I lied to my listeners.

- I lied to my boss. - Ariel, Ariel.

- Hello, hello. - Ariel, can I get a picture?

- Thank you so much for coming. - I want one, too.

You didn't lie about anything.

What are you talking about? They all think you're Jonathan.

Yeah, but it's not your fault. It's Eric's fault.

Besides, anyone listening is not going to be able

- to tell the difference. - I know, but it's just...

Ms. Cookson, I heard you on the radio.

- Great show. - Thank you.

So you're Jonathan, huh?

I thought you'd be taller.

Well, I, uh--

Plenty of room.

Watch your fingers.

I should have said something right away.

I don't know what I was thinking.

You were thinking that your boss just made a huge mistake,

and you didn't want to embarrass him.

Yeah, but all I did was make it worse.

Can I help you, Kenny?

- Nope. Just straight home? - Yes, thank you.

Hey, look, I think you're making a big deal out of nothing.

It's not nothing, okay? Not to me, anyway.

You know, my dad, he was--

he was famous for his honesty on the radio.

And that's why people loved him.

It's why they respected him so much.

I feel like I just let him down.

Well, if it's any consolation,

I kind of enjoyed playing Jonathan for a while.

- Really? - Heck yeah.

All those compliments? That was great for my ego.

Not to mention, look at this.

I got, like, half a dozen phone numbers.

- What? - Hey, you're the one

that created the perfect dream guy on the radio.

You can't blame your listeners for wanting

a little bit of the magic.

So, what are you gonna do?

Tell the truth.

Tomorrow on my show, I'll make an announcement,

and explain exactly what happened.

Exactly?

Yeah--why not?

Well, you're the relationship expert.

I mean, don't you think it's gonna be a little awkward

when your audience finds out what happened

with the real Jonathan?

Ugh, you're not really helping.

Look.

I just think you're trying to fix a problem

that doesn't exist.

Okay, I'll call you tomorrow.

- Love you. - Love you, too.

One more stop, Kenny. 10th and Howard.

No problem, Ms. Cookson.

Good night.

Good night. Thanks.

So, you're not Jonathan,

the perfect boyfriend she's always talking about?

Let's just keep that between us.

Of course. I'm a professional.

Cream. No sugar. And I got today's promo copy

three hours early.

Wow. Very impressive, Martin.

- Thank you. - There she is.

Congratulations!

Thanks. For--for what?

Yesterday's show.

I knew it was good when we were doing it,

but the overnight's came in,

and let's just say that we haven't had

ratings like this in a while.

You knocked it out of the park, kid.

That's--that's great.

You don't look excited.

Ugh, I'm sorry. It is--it is great.

Really. It's just that

I need to add something to the top of the show today.

Okay, shoot.

It's about what happened yesterday

during the live remote.

- With Jonathan? - Right.

Um, the thing is, he was--

- Nathan. - You knew?

I've watched you grow up, kid.

You guys have been pals since college, right?

- Yeah. - I don't think I've ever seen

a picture of you without him in it some place.

I know, but I didn't mean for it to happen, okay?

It's just that Jonathan-- the real Jonathan,

he broke up with me the night before the show.

And Nathan was just there to make me feel better

when the curtain opened, and--

Everybody jumped to conclusions,

- and you got stuck. - Yeah.

Well, you guys fooled everybody.

Yeah, but I-I don't want to.

I want to tell my audience the truth.

It's what my dad would do, right?

- Ariel! - Good morning, Eric. Hi.

Listen, I need to see you in my office, both of you.

Oh.

Ariel, Carl, I think you both know Mr. Frazer.

Hello, Mr. Frazer.

- Please, just Henry. - Oh.

The last time I saw you,

you were sitting on your father's lap

- in a studio.

And Carl? You don't age.

- When was the last time? - Well, you were

just starting up your company.

And now Amherst Communications Group

is one of the largest radio interests in the country.

I wouldn't go that far.

It's only 218 stations.

I wanted to go for 220, but Penny--that's my wife--

she has her own ideas.

- And one of them is you. - Me?

May I introduce my wife and business partner,

Penny Frazer. I don't make a move without her.

I'm a big fan of the show, Ariel.

I've even managed to have my husband tune in,

although talking about relationships

is not exactly one of his strongest suits.

But we both agree that you would benefit

from a wider audience.

And the Frazers think that the best way

for you to do that might be through syndication.

- My show? - Yes.

Now the plan would be to roll out

Romantically Speaking gradually,

starting with a few cities at first,

and then once we get a sense of what the ratings are,

perhaps fine tune the format,

and then let the show go national.

Oh, my gosh, this is incredible.

Hold on now. It's not a done deal.

- Well, it's do-- - There's that other shoe

- that I have to drop. - Yes.

Truth is, radio's taken a hit in the last three years,

and we only have the resources to roll out one at a time.

What my husband is trying to say is that originally

there was another show here at the station

that he was considering for syndication.

As if I have to ask which one.

Henry, how are you? It is so good to see you again.

Bethany, nice to see you.

Penny! Oh, my gosh, I haven't seen you since

that investment conference last year.

- Mm-hmm. - Oh, I love what you've done

with your hair. It is so much better.

Oh, why, thank you. Good to see you, too.

What I was saying was that we are going to have to make

a decision soon about which of your two shows

- to syndicate. - It's not just up to us.

They're--the board has to consider it, too.

Exactly, which is why we'd like to have you join us

on Saturday for a little get-together up at the house

to meet the board members.

- Sounds wonderful. - Sure. Sure.

And you will be bringing Jonathan, of course.

Right. Yeah. My boyfriend, Jonathan.

- Yeah. - When he was on your live show

yesterday, there was just such a--

- Chemistry. Yeah? Yeah. - warm and wonderful tone

to your voice.

Would be wonderful for the board members

to see that in person.

And, according to the ratings,

the audience loved it, too.

- They did? Well... - Mm-hmm.

Can't argue with numbers.

No. No, indeed.

Right.

- It's a lovely facility. - Yeah, and thank you guys

so much for coming down. It's just been great.

Penny, so lovely to see you again,

and, Henry, such a pleasure as always.

We'll see you Saturday, dear. I'm rooting for you.

Oh, thank you.

- Bye-bye. Yeah. - Bye-bye!

- Okay, listen, Bethany.

I don't want this to be some sort of

weird competition between us.

Game on.

Game on? What is she? Nine?

Listen,

I know the old Jonathan dumped you,

I'm talking about the new Jonathan.

- Nathan? - Call him up and tell him

you need him to go to the party with you.

A party where he has to pretend to be the man

I've been dating for the past year.

It worked yesterday. Why can't it work again?

Because it's a lie.

Do you know what he'd say to me if he even knew

- I was considering this? - Yeah, he'd say yes.

- What? - Come--

Let me buy you a cup of coffee. Come here.

Hmm. Your dad had an old, metal percolator that he used

practically until it fell apart.

Probably made the best-tasting coffee ever, though, right?

No, it was disgusting.

That's just how we did things back then.

When your dad and I started, there was no internet.

There was no streaming sports from around the world.

There was no cable television.

- The baseball games

that were played in the morning on the East Coast

would be over by the time the people on the West Coast

were finishing their breakfast.

Well, obviously the games were over.

So a lot of stations would broadcast the final scores.

But not your dad.

- Well, why not? - Because he didn't want to

spoil the game so the fans that were going to be watching

- that night. - Okay.

So would you say your dad was lying?

No, of course not.

He was just--he was just delaying the information.

Exactly. So, when the time is right,

Ariel, you can tell your audience about you and Jonathan.

When the time is right.

But maybe not today.

Maybe not tomorrow.

Maybe not until you have that syndication contract

- in your hand. - I don't know, Carl.

I just--it seems wrong.

I've said my peace.

Maybe what you need now is a second opinion.

You have got to be kidding.

I know, I know. And I will totally understand

if you don't want to do it, but I promise

it'll just be this once more and then never again

will I ever ask you to do me--

Okay, let me get this straight.

You're asking me to reschedule

an incredibly important presentation

for a new client to go to a party?

Attended by some of the most influential people

in the media business in this city,

and for the second time in as many days,

pretend to be the boyfriend that dumped you,

and moved halfway around the world

just so you can secure a syndication contract

for your radio show?

What do I wear?

Help.

(Krista) So you're going to pretend to be Jonathan.

You guys are getting into very weird territory here.

What? Me and Ariel? I mean, really?

The two of us together?

- Give me a break. - You and Ariel have known

each other since college, and you're trying to tell me

that neither one of you has ever had

a romantic thought about the other?

- Of course not. - Ever?

- Never. - Huh.

'Cause, you know, things like that,

well, let's just say it complicates friendships.

Look, I appreciate your concern, guys.

Honestly.

But you have nothing to worry about.

Ariel and I are not gonna fall in love.

Let's just hope those aren't famous last words, buddy.

- Hmm.

Lint.

- What? - You got lint.

Fortunately, you're traveling with the Boy Scout

of all drivers.

My motto,

"Always be prepared."

Oh.

Right. Thanks.

So you're Ms. Cookson's date again today, huh?

Yeah. Uh, more or less.

And you're sure you're not the boyfriend?

Hi.

- Wow. - You've seen this dress,

like, a million times.

Yeah, just never--

never like this.

Come on. We're going to be late.

Oh, uh, I-I got it. I got it.

- Ahem. - What are you doing?

Doesn't Jonathan open the door for you?

- I don't really remember. - Well, I open the door

for all my dates.

Even pretend dates?

Especially pretend dates.

- Wow. - Yeah.

Nice place.

I like a house with it's own zip code.

All right, so, remember what we talked about in the car?

That we've been dating for over a year, and--

And I'm perfect.

Just be yourself, but different.

- Okay, let's go. - Wait.

- Hands. - What?

Well, if we're boyfriend/girlfriend,

we should be holding hands, right?

- Yeah, right. Yeah. - So?

(both) No. - Like that?

- No. - Like this.

No, no. No.

Do you want to linking or cupped?

Linking. Cupped seems too formal.

- Okay. - Palm up or down?

- You go palm down. - Okay.

Yeah. Like that.

- All right. - That--that works.

- Hmm. - Wow.

Ariel, so glad you could make it.

Henry, your home is beautiful.

Oh, thank my wife for that.

Penny's a stickler for detail.

Everything has to be just right or,

well, I should say everything has to be just right.

Mm, yeah.

And you must be the famous Jonathan.

Ah, you must be Mr. Frazer.

Henry. Call me Henry. Everybody does.

Penny and I are big fans of Ariel's show,

and I guess that makes us big fans of yours, too.

Well, I hope I can live up to your expectations.

Come on in. Grab yourselves a drink,

and I'll introduce you to the board.

Okay. Yeah. Henry, wow.

- Sir, here's a drink. - Oh.

- Great. Thank you. - Thank you.

So, Jonathan, what do you think about this new

right-to-nondisclosure law they passed earlier this year?

Uh, I haven't really given it much thought.

I thought you'd have some fairly strong opinions on it

- given that you're a lawyer.

- No, I'm not a lawyer. - Cheers.

I'm a lawyer. Um, I'm just not a lawyer

in that particular part of the law that I practice.

I am more into a non-nondisclosure type law

- that I practice. - I'm not familiar with that--

Oh, look, there's Bethany.

- Oh, look, Bethany. Hey. - Let's go say hi.

So there I was doing my show, and suddenly the door

to the studio opened, and in walks Henry

with a big smile on his face.

Of course, I had no idea who he was,

so I-I yelled at him, and I was about to throw him

out of my studio, when he says,

"Now I know why your show is called Straight Talk."

- Ariel, you finally made it. - Hi.

Everyone, I'd like for you to meet Ariel Cookson.

Some of you might remember her father, Richard,

legendary sportscaster here in town.

- Hi. - Hello.

- Hello. - Pleased to meet you.

Ariel grew up in radio.

Her first on-air appearance was what--when you were ten?

Well, I was visiting my dad,

and when he was out of the room,

I accidentally pressed the microphone on.

I think they heard my voice

from here to Des Moines.

Isn't it funny how the children of famous people

always seem to get a lucky break?

And the rest of us just have to rely on talent

to make it in this treacherous business?

Yeah. Lucky Ariel.

Good thing she didn't have to rely

on her B.A. in Communications

or her Masters in Social Psychology to get the job.

I'm sorry. I don't believe we've met.

Is this the man we've been hearing about

on your show all these months, Ariel?

- Is this actually the real-- - Jonathan?

Is this Jonathan? Well, of course it is.

Jonathan, I would like for you to meet my wife Penny.

So lovely to meet you.

It is a pleasure, Mrs. Frazer.

Oh! Such manners.

Please call me Penny.

Ariel, you were right all along.

He is a Prince Charming come to life, isn't he?

Aw.

Well, you won't mind if I borrow him for a few minutes.

There's something that I must ask you.

- Uh. - I'll bring him back,

I promise.

Take care of him.

Okay, everyone, the bar is open,

the buffet is full.

Please make yourselves at home,

and get to know these two special guests, please.

Thank you.

Thank you so much, Henry.

The first time I heard your girlfriend

talk about it on the radio, I thought,

"Penny, you absolutely must experience this for yourself."

- Uh-huh. - But no matter how hard

we try, I just am simply not satisfied.

That's why I was very excited when Henry told me

that you were going to be here today,

I just knew that I could count on you

to show me how it's done.

- How what's done? - Well, the cake, of course.

Your famous Argentinean spicy chocolate torte.

The one that you made for Ariel for her birthday.

The one you always make.

Oh, the cake! Of course, yes.

Yes! Oh, my goodness. Would you be a love

and please explain the recipe to our cook?

He's very good. We brought him over from Paris,

but he just can't seem to quite get it.

Would you please?

You want me to give him the recipe?

Yes.

It'll only take a minute. I'll go and get him.

You stay right here. Yes?

Okay.

(Fiona) Demos never lie.

TSL and the PUR, the day part, okay.

What does this mean, exactly?

- To whom? - Bethany.

She's average in the met cume, but stands out in her core demo,

which skews older and male.

Bethany does okay.

Okay is not good enough.

What do you want from me, Tiger?

Sorry. But, you know, it's just I'm under

a lot of pressure lately.

Aren't we all?

Okay. Well, thank you.

(Eric) It's been a real banner year, actually.

And we have new talent coming in.

Both shows do very well in their demographics.

And in terms of ratings, they've been virtually tied

for most of the year.

Excuse me, Eric, but I think the numbers

showed Romantically Speaking

doing a little bit better than a tie.

Oh, those were in the overnights, Ariel.

The week-to-week tends to fluctuate,

but we'll have all those numbers for you by the end of the month.

Excuse us?

I just want to introduce you to somebody over here

if you don't mind.

I just want to show you something over here.

It's really exciting. You're gonna love this.

Um, it just--I just had to ask, what was that about?

Self-preservation.

I didn't know that you had chosen a side.

I'm on the station's side, Ariel.

Whether it's your show or Bethany's,

this syndication deal is worth a lot of money for us.

I'd appreciate a little cooperation if you don't mind.

- Oh. - Hmm.

We have a problem.

- What now? - It's about Jonathan's torte.

I told you it wasn't his. He bought it.

I know. That's the problem.

Oh. There you are. Gaston is very busy.

So you'll have to come give him the recipe in the kitchen.

- Come. - Recipe?

- Yeah, um-- - Yes?

- Mm-mm. Nope. - We can't tell you the recipe.

Because, um...

Because...

- Because it's a secret. - A secret?

- Yeah. - Yes.

It's an old, traditional family secret-recipe thing.

Jonathan's sworn to secrecy.

On my mother's grave.

Oh, my goodness. When did she pass?

Just last week, Ariel said she lived in Miami.

I'm so sorry.

Well, she's not dead yet.

But, uh, we're gonna bury her there.

Okay.

Well, I can't say that I'm not disappointed.

I had hoped to have a cake

at my charity auction next weekend.

It's a very big event.

All the board members will be there,

and I thought perhaps having one of Jonathan's tortes

might be a reminder of your show, Ariel.

It just might have been that thing

that tipped the scales in your favor.

But, alas...

- Penny? - Oh, excuse me.

(Penny) Coming, darling.

- Here she is. - Sorry.

We planned and organized this entire afternoon.

- Thank you.

- Oh. - Yeah.

Finally, I think I'd like to hear from our special guests.

I'd like to hear them say a couple of words.

So our first is a wonderful young woman,

who manages to make finance understandable,

even for someone like me.

From Straight Talk with Bethany,

here's the host, Ms. Bethany Sloane.

Thank you so much, Henry.

And thank you all for taking the time to be here today.

Let's face it, radio is a cutthroat business,

and this is a competition.

But when you make your final decision,

I would like to hope it's not based

solely on ratings alone.

But also on the truth, the honesty, and the integrity

that have been the hallmarks of Straight Talk with Bethany

since it began over five years ago.

- Thank you.

Couldn't have said it better myself, Bethany.

Thank you.

And now our other candidate,

a special young woman who brings her real-life relationship

experience to work every day,

and thankfully for us, she's not afraid to share it.

From Romantically Speaking, Ariel Cookson.

Whoo!

You know, Bethany was saying that honesty and truth

is very important in radio, and she's right.

They are.

They're important in life too,

especially when we're talking about relationships.

So I wanted to take this opportunity

to set the record straight

about my boyfriend, Jonathan.

You see, he's, uh...

- He's-- - He's gonna bake a cake!

Yep, at Mrs. Frazer's special request,

my famous spicy Argentinean chocolate torte.

And it will be available for the charity auction next weekend,

courtesy of Romantically Speaking,

and Miss Ariel Cookson.

Oh, bravo!

(Henry) That's great. Oh, that's great.

Jonathan, can we get a picture

for the website?

Yes. Yes.

- There you go.

- Oh. - How about a kiss?

- Oh, okay. - Come on.

- Kiss, kiss! - No, not that kind of kiss.

- A proper kiss. A real kiss. - Oh, Henry, come on, now.

- Come on. - Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss.

Okay.

So how was the party?

(both) About that kiss--

Ugh.

Okay, you first.

Oh, no. I, um...

I was just gonna say it felt really--

- Awkward. - Right.

- Yeah. - Awkward.

Yep.

Oh, so--so what do we do now?

Well...

I guess we just accept what happened

and move forward.

No, I meant about the cake.

Yeah, that's what I'm talking about...

the cake.

Accept what happened with the cake and move forward.

Oh, but there--there must be 100 bakeshops in the city.

Yeah, and we will search every one until we find it.

Don't worry. Penny Frazer will get her cake.

Nathan, I don't know how to thank you for everything today.

I just hope I was a good-enough Jonathan for you.

That's all.

Better than the original.

Okay, I'll call you tomorrow.

All right.

- Good night. - Good night.

What? No kiss good night?

What? No. We're friends.

Right.

Friends.

(Krista) What if they're not pretending?

- Who? - Nathan and Ariel.

What if they're really falling for each other?

That is impossible. You heard Nathan.

They are just friends, nothing more.

I don't know.

I get the feeling he wasn't being

completely honest about how he really feels.

Sweetheart, we are their best friends.

We would know if something romantic

was going on between them.

Wouldn't we?

Well, they obviously care about each other.

I think it'd be kind of sweet if it became something more.

Yeah, well, we also thought he and Sarah

were gonna be something more too,

and look how that turned out.

Oh, don't be silly.

Nathan and Ariel are old friends.

They would never hate each other.

Doesn't matter what happened.

But what if they did? We'd have to pick a side.

Yeah, you know what that means.

What does it mean, Dave?

It means we could potentially lose

one of our babysitters.

Don't be ridiculous.

And I'm--I'm gonna go talk to him

and find out what's really going on.

- Don't you dare! - Mm.

They are adults, and they have the right

to live their own lives,

and if that includes falling in love,

then I think-- Oh!

Oh, is it time?

No.

No. No, but our child is

either going to be a professional soccer player

or end up on Broadway.

- Ooh. - Let me see.

- Oh, my goodness. - I told you.

(Ariel) Well, that's a question

poets have struggled to answer for centuries.

Every love song ever composed,

every great novel ever written has wrestled with that.

Some people say it's the central question

that defines us as human beings.

(man on phone) What are the signs?

Well, the signs--I mean, I don't think there are any signs,

not in the traditional sense at least.

I think one day you just...

see that person in a different light.

What may have started out as a friendship

suddenly becomes something else...

something deeper.

You find yourself at work,

so you're thinking about what you're going to have for lunch,

and then wondering what he's going to have for lunch,

and maybe you two should have lunch together.

(man) Is that how it was with you and Jonathan?

Yes, of course. It was just like that.

Thank you so much for your call.

That's all the time we have for today.

I want to thank everyone out there who's listening

and everybody who called in.

This has been Romantically Speaking.

I'm your host, Ariel Cookson,

and as my father used to say,

"Your happiness is up to you."

(man) Stay tuned for more news on the hour.

Up next, Straight Talk with Bethany.

And we're out.

Another great show, Ariel.

You are firing on all eight cylinders this week.

Thanks, Carl. It felt good.

That bit about poets,

that was, um-- it was poetic.

Yeah, well, I hope my listeners think so.

Oh, any news about the ratings this week?

Um, nothing that I've heard,

but I'd be willing to bet that they're up,

because, Ariel, it's as if you've found

a new voice or something.

It's...

This wouldn't have anything to do

with you and Nathan, would it?

I don't know what you're talking about.

Listen, Ariel, you can't spend all these hours

with someone in this tiny little room

and not know a few things.

It seems to me that Jonathan is a distant memory.

I wish he was, Carl, but you heard me in there.

I'm lying to my listeners,

talking about Jonathan as if we're still together,

and I'm doing it for the worst possible reason--

ratings.

It'll be over before you know it.

You'll see. You'll get that syndication deal.

You'll go national,

and you'll be able to tell all the truth you want.

I've called every cake shop, bakeshop,

and dessert place in town.

Nobody's even heard of a spicy Argentinean chocolate torte.

He bought it some place, we just have to keep looking.

It's got to be out there somewhere.

We're running out of time.

I know, I know.

Let me call you back.

What?

- Okay, what are you doing?

Management felt it was time I had a new picture up.

Perfect.

Just a little higher on the left.

Okay, does it have to be that close to my father?

Hmm, you're right.

Martin, take him down and move him to the end.

Oh, good. You're both here.

I just got off the phone with Henry Frazer.

He's made his decision?

Brace yourself, Ariel.

No, not yet, but--

So sorry. Excuse me. Excuse me.

But he wanted me to remind you

about his wife's charity fund-raiser this weekend.

I know. I'm supposed to send a cake.

Well, not just that.

All of Henry's board members are supposed to be there.

The rumor is they're going to officially announce

their choice for the syndication deal.

Henry wants you both to be there.

He thinks it'll be good publicity for the launch.

Oh, and Mrs. Frazer wanted me to remind you to bring Jonathan.

W-w-wait. What?

Well, it's a tennis tournament, and you've always said

what a great tennis player Jonathan is.

Now we get to see him in action.

Yeah.

If what I'm hearing about my numbers this week is true,

you probably don't really need to be there, anyway.

Yeah, thanks.

Hey, it's me again.

I have more bad news.

Huh. I thought she and Jonathan weren't together anymore.

What makes you say that?

Oh, well, uh, at the live taping last week,

she introduced this guy onstage,

but, uh, Carl said it wasn't Jonathan.

So who was it?

Beats me.

Carl just told me to mind my own business.

Probably shouldn't have said that.

Don't be so hard on yourself, Martin.

I think you said just enough.

Ow!

- God. - Nathan...

You got to keep your eye on the ball, man.

You can't just stand there.

It's been ten years, okay?

I'm a little rough. I got to loosen up.

I got this.

(Ariel) Well, do you know where I could find one?

Oh, okay.

Well, thank you, anyway.

Good-bye.

- Still no luck? - Nothing. Ugh.

I'm beginning to think he has the cakes

imported from Argentina.

Let me ask you something.

- Shoot. - Is there more to this

than you just pretending to be Jonathan?

- What's that supposed to mean? - Have you two ever...

Kissed?

Yeah, lots of times.

I'm not talking about a peck-on-the-cheek kiss.

I'm talking about a full-on kiss kiss.

Well, once,

at the Frazers' party, but it was just for publicity.

Uh-huh.

And how was it?

It was...

It was...

I thought so.

Just stop, okay?

I would never let anything like that happen with Nathan, anyway.

He has a horrible track record.

Do you know how many relationships he's had?

It doesn't matter how many relationships she's had.

The only man who really counts in her eyes is Richard Cookson.

Her dad?

She looks up to that guy so much,

she never bothered to look around to see anybody else.

You don't want to end up like Jonathan.

Wait. I thought he broke up with her.

Out of self-defense.

I think he couldn't keep his balance

on top of that pedestal anymore, and he just decided to give up.

Look, it's not as if...

We're falling in love or anything.

We're just good friends.

That's all.

(Ariel) Since we can't buy the cake, we're gonna make it.

(Krista) I've got it.

Right here--

spicy Argentinean chocolate torte,

the whole recipe.

Well, okay, it looks-- it looks kind of complicated.

Yeah, um, neither of us are very good in the kitchen.

- You know? - Uh-huh.

(Krista) Oh, it'll be easy.

All the ingredients are listed right here.

- It won't take us long at all.

Oh.

Hello?

Uh-huh. What? That was today?

What time? I'll be right there.

I totally forgot.

I have a checkup at the doctor's office

this afternoon that I can't miss.

I'm so sorry, guys. I got to run.

Um, but, what are we supposed to do?

We need the cake for tomorrow.

Just follow the recipe.

You'll be fine.

Wow.

Hi. That was perfect.

Yeah, thanks for calling.

It's a long story. I'll tell you later.

Okay, bye.

Okay, we can do this.

Yeah, right. We'll just follow the recipe.

Yeah. How hard can it be?

Right.

What's a double boiler?

Oh--

♪ You are my candy girl ♪

♪ And you got me wanting you ♪

♪ Honey ♪

♪ Oh, sugar, sugar ♪

♪ You are my candy girl ♪

♪ And you got me wanting you ♪

Sugar.

Sugar.

Sugar.

(Nathan) One, two, three, four, five.

♪ I just can't believe the wonder of this feeling too ♪

♪ I just can't believe it's true ♪

♪ Oh, sugar ♪

♪ Oh, honey, honey ♪

Nathan! Oh, my gosh!

- Nathan! - What?

Okay.

- Oh, no!

Oh, no! I got it!

- Whoa. - Whoa.

♪ Oh, honey ♪

♪ You are my candy girl ♪

♪ And you got me wanting you ♪

Hi, honey.

Hi.

You're home early.

Apparently, not early enough. Come on.

You're getting really good at this.

Thank you. So are you.

(Dave) I have a feeling you had something to do with this.

I guess we might have to find a new babysitter.

You have some chocolate.

Aw.

(Bethany) And that's all the time we have for today.

I hope I've talked some sense into a few of our callers

and maybe the rest of my listeners, while we're at it.

This has been Straight Talk with Bethany Sloane.

Until next time, remember, it's your money.

Respect it, or somebody else will.

And we're out.

Okay, so I went back through her show archives--

Thank you, Carl. Good show.

That'll be all.

Okay, so I searched through her files,

and she mentions Jonathan's name

about 682 times, give or take.

What about his job, Martin?

Well, I-I haven't found that yet.

You know, I have to admit...

doing this makes me feel a little dirty.

You want a career in the radio business?

Yeah. More than anything.

Mm.

Then keep looking.

What, did you forget something?

No. No, it's just...

Well, if Henry and his cronies make their decision today,

this is the last time I get to play Jonathan.

You say that like it's a bad thing.

No. No, not at all.

It's just, um...

What happens next?

Well, I don't know about you,

but I can't wait to find out.

Hello, and welcome, everyone. Welcome. Welcome.

Thank you so much for coming out on this glorious day

to support Penny Frazer's Children's Fund.

Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Now, listen, boys and girls,

not only do we have our terrific tennis tournament

and our savvy silent auction this year,

but we are so fortunate and lucky to have with us

two celebrity experts.

Ariel Cookson. Yes, Thank you.

Whoo!

And Bethany Sloane.

And they're here today to answer your questions

about relationships and finance.

But, of course, it comes at a price.

Each question costs you $100.

Is it tax-deductible?

Well, I don't know.

Why don't we ask the expert. Bethany?

- Well-- - Uh, wait, wait, wait.

Is this one gonna cost me?

Why, yes, Clint. Yes, it is.

Then my question is for Ariel.

Oh, well, all right.

Go get that $100 bill from him right away.

Thank you, Clint. Everyone, thank you.

What's your question?

Well, I've been dating a gal for two years now,

and I've asked her to marry me three times.

But every time I ask her, she says,

"Ask me again next year."

You see, my trouble is that I'm getting so old

that I'm afraid I won't live long enough

to get her to say yes.

(crowd) Aw.

What am I gonna do?

Oh, Clint, you stop it. You're not too old at all.

- Sorry. You go ahead. - It's okay.

Uh, well, that's a really good question.

You see...

I think that love is worth waiting for.

And it doesn't always happen when you want or expect it to.

Sometimes it's hidden right in front of our eyes, but...

it always seems to find a way,

no matter how long it takes.

(crowd) Aw.

- Oh, my God. - Aw.

Lovely answer, Ariel. Thank you so much.

Okay, next question.

Anyone? Zoe. Zoe, go ahead.

My question is for Bethany.

Here you go.

Does the FDCPA 15 USC 1692 e-law apply to statements

made during litigation which are later determined

to be false?

You mean like in a foreclosure action?

Yes.

Yes, it applies.

Thank you.

Whoo, well, what a relief.

- My goodness.

Next question, anyone?

For Ariel perhaps?

Can I ask a question?

Well, yes, for $100, you can ask it.

Those of you who don't know, this is Jonathan.

This handsome man-- this is Ariel's boyfriend.

You may have heard about him on her show.

Well, I don't know, young man.

What kind of question are you going to ask?

Uh, well, it's a pretty simple one.

Do you believe in true love?

I do now.

(crowd) Aw.

(Penny) Aw.

- I think I'm crying.

Oh, my goodness, while I recover,

if anyone has a question for Bethany...

I can't believe it.

We raised over $5,000 already

just that question-and-answer session alone.

I'll tell you, a part of it is you guys.

You're so adorable together.

Ariel, let me tell you, if it were up to me,

you'd have that syndication contract

in your hot little hand already.

Penny, do you know something we don't?

Oh, I wish I did.

Secret ballots, nobody knows anything.

Henry did promise to make the announcement

after the tennis final, so fingers crossed.

Okay, Ariel, I'll show you where you can change.

And, Jonathan, the tennis courts are just over there.

Okay, see you in a bit.

- All right. - See you out there.

Nathan?

- Nathan! - Aah! Oh, Sarah!

- Hi. - What are you doing here?

Oh, Daddy's on Penny Frazer's charity board.

We come every year.

But what are you doing here,

and why is everyone calling you Jonathan?

- Shh! - What?

Did you just shush me?

Yeah. We need to talk.

- Come on. - Okay.

- Right down here. - Okay.

- Right. Now... - What?

Let me explain.

Are you just doing this to make me jealous?

No. No, no, it's for Ariel, okay?

You remember my friend Ariel?

Yes, from the radio. I know.

But why are you pretending to be her boyfriend?

Because the real one dumped her, okay?

And I was just-- I was in the wrong place

at the wrong time, and then, suddenly, all of a sudden,

everyone thought I was Jonathan.

And she's just caught in this big lie,

and I'm trying to help her out.

You're just trying to help her.

Right.

So it's not really true.

You're not actually her boyfriend.

- No, not really.

Nathan...

Oh, that is the best news I've heard all week.

- I'm sorry, what?

Oh, Ariel, aren't you cute in your little outfit?

Thanks.

If you're looking for your boyfriend,

he's just around the corner there.

Okay.

Oh, when I saw you standing there across the crowd,

I just--I realized something, you know...

something really important.

And what was that?

I realized how special

our time together really was.

You know, I think maybe...

Those were the best days of my life.

Sarah, we went on four dates together.

Yeah.

You stood me up on the last one.

- Mm-hmm. - Then when I called you,

your phone had been disconnected.

Oh, yeah.

I was going through some weird stuff, too.

But I got a cycle therapist.

Don't you mean "psychotherapist"?

Mm. Mm-mm. Nope.

A cycle therapist.

She runs a spin class at my gym,

and she is really trying to help me

focus more on myself.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute!

No, we can't stop, Nathan. Get over here!

- No! - We can't waste any more time!

We've already wasted enough time already!

No. Stop it!

- Would you just stop?

Look, Sarah, I think you are a really...

really nice girl.

Thank you.

But...

But I'm in love with someone else.

What?

Who?

(woman on PA) The tennis tournament will be starting in five minutes.

All contestants please meet at the center court.

Thank you.

Look...

The tennis tournament will be starting in five minutes...

- I-I got to go. - Mm-mm.

- Mm-mm. - Okay?

- Let go. No, okay. - No.

I'll see you later. Let go.

Please let go. All right.

I'll call you.

Hello.

(woman on PA) On the home team, let's welcome our hosts,

Penny and Henry Frazer.

Good luck.

Thank you. Good luck.

And our visitors today,

Ariel Cookson and her boyfriend, Jonathan.

- Yeah, Jonathan. - Go, Jonathan.

Glad you could pull yourself away.

- Huh? - Let's play!

All right.

(woman on PA) Let the tournament begin.

Ugh!

Got it.

(woman on PA) Wow. Ariel's on fire.

Oh!

And 15-love to the visitors.

You know, you can let me hit a few.

I'm not completely helpless.

Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I'm just not used to being able

to count on people.

What's that supposed to mean?

Really? The moment my back is turned,

you're off getting friendly with some girl in the courtyard.

- Wait, you saw that? -Yes, I did.

And not a moment too soon.

Ah.

- Come.

What's up, tiger?

Fiona, hi.

Um, here's the transcripts.

Find what you were looking for?

Well, no.

It happens.

- I think I'm stuck. - Go on.

Well, I want to learn more about Ariel's boyfriend.

I mean, people are crazy for him.

- I want to know why. - What do you want to know?

Well, his last name, for starters.

Loria. Jonathan Loria.

- He's a Loria. - How do you know that?

Ariel posted it in her show's FAQ.

Huh.

The only man that can live up to your ridiculous standards

- of perfection is your father! - Got it.

You leave my father out of this.

I will if you will.

(woman on PA) And go, Jonathan.

Okay, I'm calling it.

- Yeah! - Hey!

- That's it. It's over. - No. No.

That was-- I wasn't looking.

(woman on PA) And the winners are Ariel and Jonathan,

in what might be the fastest game

in the history of our event.

- Good job, Ariel. Yeah. - Thank you.

- Thank you so much. - Nice job. Yeah.

Good game.

(Nathan) Would you wait a minute?

- Please? - Never mind, Nathan.

I don't want to keep you from anything.

You just called me Nathan.

Yeah, what difference does it make?

Nathan, Jonathan-- they both left me.

Stop, okay? Would you just stop?

The girl you saw me with, that was Sarah.

Sarah, like, "It didn't work out" Sarah?

Exactly.

Well, it looked like it worked out after all.

No, it didn't. That's the point.

She wanted more, and...

I told her no.

Didn't look like you were saying no very loudly.

What do you want me to do?

Tell her to get lost and just walk away from her?

Then I'd really be Jonathan.

Sorry. I shouldn't have said that.

Well...

I shouldn't have said what I said either.

So...

what do we do now?

Maybe this whole boyfriend-girlfriend thing

isn't such a good idea.

Yeah.

Maybe we should just stay friends.

Sure. Friends.

Well, this isn't awkward at all, is it?

(man on PA) Will everyone please gather by the fountain

for a very special announcement?

And now it gives me great pleasure

to make a very special announcement

on behalf of the Amherst Communications Group.

As you all know, over the past two weeks,

we have been watching

our two very special guests today very closely

or, more specifically, I should say,

listening to them very closely.

And I'm very happy to announce

that after some deep consideration from our board,

they have made their decision.

Bethany and Ariel are both extraordinary young ladies,

and it was a tough choice to make.

So, without further ado, the Amherst Communications Group

proudly welcomes to the family, Ms....

Ariel Cookson.

Oh, my gosh.

Get on up there.

- Congratulations. - Congratulations.

- So well-deserved. - Thank you.

- Wow. - And bring that handsome

boyfriend of yours with the sledgehammer

forehand up here, please.

Let's get some photos.

Board, why don't you come up here, please?

- Yeah. - Thank you guys so much.

(woman) There you go.

(man) Cheese.

- All right? - All right.

(Henry) Okay, and now you two together.

Thank you, board.

(all) Aw.

(Penny) Congratulations to Ariel!

Romantically Speaking!

Martin, this better be important.

I am not in the mood.

But I've got some good news.

I found him.

I found Jonathan.

Where?

- Good night, buddy. - Good night.

(Richard on radio) But if our team is gonna succeed,

if we're gonna go to the championship,

if we're gonna bring home the pennant,

we have to stop playing the game as if we might lose.

We have to start playing as if it's a foregone conclusion

that we're gonna win.

This is Richard Cookson, and hat's The Way The Ball Bounces,

you're listening to KQRY, and we'll be right back.

I remember that one.

Oh, my gosh.

He was fired up all day.

Yeah. He really was the best, wasn't he?

What are you still doing here, anyway?

I heard from Eric you got the contract.

Congratulations.

- Thanks. - Thanks?

That's it? I figured you'd be out with Nathan celebrating.

I don't need Nathan to celebrate.

I can do it alone, without him.

- You two had a fight? - No, it wasn't a fight.

It's just things didn't work out, that's all.

(Richard on radio) Hi. Welcome to the program.

This is KQRY Radio, and you're listening

to The Way The Ball Bounces, and--

I was listening to that.

No, you weren't. You were hiding in it.

This is Richard Cooskon-- Ah.

This is Richard Cookson,

and you are listening to The Ball--

I mean, you're listening--

You're listening to The Ball That--

This is Richard Cookson,

and you're listening to That's The Way--

No, it's called--

it's called The Way The Ball Bounces, okay.

Okay, here we go. You're listening to The Way--

Okay, with last night's scores,

we've got Braves slapped the Cougars 9 to--

What, "slapped"? Who wrote this stupid copy?

Well, it's garbage. I'm not reading this.

Get him in here.

The Way The Ball Bounces is sponsored by--

Will you stop moving around in there?

You're distracting me, all right?

How am I supposed to read this idiotic ad

if you keep wandering around in there like a zombie?

What are you doing?

I thought you should hear this.

What? That my father needed a few takes

to get something right?

Exactly.

Even Richard Cookson was human.

Your dad was a great guy, Ariel,

but he wasn't perfect.

And no matter how hard you tried to make him that,

neither was Jonathan.

Now, maybe Nathan has a few faults too,

but you shouldn't let the fact that he's not the perfect guy

keep you from being the perfect couple.

Hi, Dave.

Okay.

- Hey. - Hi.

Look. Look, look, Zachary,

it's your Auntie Ariel coming to visit.

Oh, my gosh, he is beautiful.

Just like his mom.

- Oh, you guys.

(Nathan) Am I too late?

Did he already apply for college?

Well, you know, we're having a hard time choosing.

(Dave) I'm leaning towards Yale.

- Hi. - Hi.

Can I hold him?

- Oh, oh, sure. - Yeah, come on.

- Sure, sure, sure. - Just, uh...

Okay. Just hold the head, okay?

All right. I got you.

Wow. Okay. There. Oh. Ooh.

Nathan told us you got the syndication deal.

Congratulations.

Thanks. I mean, it's nothing compared to this, though.

- Oh. - I'm so happy for you guys.

You got a little grip on you.

Your dad's gonna have you playing tennis

before you can even walk.

- That's right.

You might even be able to beat your Aunt Ariel.

But be careful.

I think she cheats.

I was wondering if it'd be okay if I took the rest

of the night off,

unless, of course, you have plans with Nathan.

What?

With Nathan. Do you have any plans tonight?

No. And for the record, my plans don't always

have to involve Nathan.

It's not like he's my boyfriend or anything.

Could've fooled me.

Good night.

- Ariel, hi. - Hi.

Um, I need to talk with you

about tomorrow.

Okay.

I have been thinking about what I did

and how I put success ahead of everything else.

Well, everyone in this conversation is guilty of that.

But I let it push me into doing things

that I knew in my heart weren't right.

And I was your willing accomplice.

I mean, I still am, I guess.

That's why I called.

Um...

tomorrow I'm going on the air to set things straight.

I just wanted to give you a heads-up.

It's the right thing to do.

Love you.

Have a good night.

Bethany?

Hello, Mrs. Frazer. Is your husband home?

I don't like to do this.

But I felt, given your investment,

you should know the truth.

Oh, there she is. Hey!

- Congratulations. - Oh, thank you so much.

Oh, look at this. Look at this.

- Hello?

(Jonathan) Yeah, I'm here. I can hear you, Bethany.

Oh, hold on just a minute, please.

Henry, Penny, there's someone I'd like you to meet...

The real Jonathan.

Hello. Hi, um--

Bethany, what's going on here?

I thought you said Ariel was gonna be there.

Hello, and welcome once again to Romantically Speaking.

I'm your host, Ariel Cookson.

And before we take the first call,

I have a confession to make.

I call myself a relationship expert.

It's how I make a living.

But the thing is...

I'm a fraud.

I've been presenting myself as someone

who has this perfect relationship

with this perfect guy, but...

I've been lying.

You've all heard me talk about Jonathan,

how he's this amazing man with a wonderful career,

a great personality, incredible talent,

and a killer chocolate cake.

Well, about two weeks ago, Jonathan dumped me,

and it was my fault..

Because even though he's a very nice guy,

he really isn't all those things I said he was,

and I made him think he had to be.

The truth is he didn't even bake that famous cake for me.

He bought it.

Anyway, that's when my friend Nathan came in the picture.

The audience at the live remote saw us together

and assumed he was Jonathan, and I...

Well, every time I kept trying to tell the truth,

something seemed to get in the way.

And to be quite honest, that something was ambition.

It was wrong, and I know it.

I just want to say I'm sorry to all of you out there

for letting you down.

I'm also sorry to Mr. Frazer and the board.

They trusted me and gave me an amazing opportunity.

I will totally understand

if they want to rethink their offer.

And finally, I want to say

I'm sorry to Nathan.

I'm always telling you listeners to keep looking

and you'll find true love.

Well...

mine was right there in front of me all along.

And while he may not be the perfect guy,

for a while there, we were perfect together.

As my father always said, your happiness is up to you,

and I guess that's true in a way.

But I think I've learned that it's not such a bad thing

to share that happiness with somebody that you love.

We'll be right back.

Well, at least she had the good sense to own up to it.

Did Ariel know that you were coming here today?

No. She didn't know anything about this.

I see.

Well, given the situation...

there really is only one course of action.

The contract stands.

What?

I agree with my husband.

That young woman showed more integrity and honesty

with that speech of hers than you,

with your sordid little attempt at backstabbing,

will ever be able to imagine.

Amherst Communications is proud of the association

with Ariel Cookson,

and I hope it lasts for a very long time.

Good day, Ms. Sloane.

- But I-- - It is too bad, though.

We were actually considering you

for a syndication slot down the road,

but now I guess we'll have to start looking all over again.

You can show yourself out, yes?

What's she doing in there?

Telling the truth, I guess.

We've had over 200 phone calls since she started.

I was afraid of that.

Afraid? Are you kidding me?

They love her. We've had people calling in

offering sympathy, congratulations, advice.

We've even had half a dozen marriage proposals.

This is the best response we've ever had to her show.

Whatever she's doing in there, tell her to keep it up.

Good, 'cause we have a very special call for her right now.

Welcome back to Romantically Speaking.

I'm your host, Ariel Cookson.

And we have someone on the line from--

It doesn't say where he's calling from.

Go ahead, caller.

(Nathan on phone) Hi, Ariel. I love your show.

My question is about a situation I'm having

with a girl I know.

She's very special to me, and we've been together a long time,

but I want to take our relationship

to the next level.

All right. And what's stopping you from doing that?

Well, it doesn't seem like much,

but it's just one little word, really.

One word.

See, we always tell each other "love you,"

you know, when we say good-bye or something.

"Love you."

But we never say, "I love you."

Just once, I'd like to hear her say the whole thing.

- You think that's silly?

No, not at all.

Maybe she's waiting for you to say it first.

You think so?

Why don't you try it?

Okay, I will.

Nathan.

The girl on the radio told me I should just come out

and say it, so I'm going to.

I love you.

I love you too.

It's about time.

You've been listening to Romantically Speaking

with your host, Ariel Cookson.

Tune in again tomorrow, folks, and remember,

Your happiness is up to you.