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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:31,073 --> 00:00:34,284 I like to think about the beginning of the universe a lot. 2 00:00:34,493 --> 00:00:36,286 A lot, a lot. 3 00:00:36,495 --> 00:00:40,040 About how there's ten trillion galaxies, 4 00:00:40,249 --> 00:00:42,751 more stars than grains of sand on the Earth, 5 00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:47,339 how it's been around for 13.82 billion years, give or take. 6 00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:50,175 So why does this stupid little moment feel so big? 7 00:00:52,678 --> 00:00:53,679 It's so small. 8 00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:56,431 My first day at public school. 9 00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,642 That's my mom holding my hand. 10 00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:01,061 Are you sure we should be holding hands? 11 00:01:01,270 --> 00:01:03,814 - Yeah, yeah, obviously. - Don't be nervous. 12 00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:06,441 Let's go in. I'm freezing my tits off out here. 13 00:01:06,650 --> 00:01:07,568 Okay. 14 00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,361 Big freaking exam day. 15 00:01:14,324 --> 00:01:16,159 I don't know this yet, 16 00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:19,454 but walking through those doors is gonna change my life forever, 17 00:01:19,663 --> 00:01:23,208 like some supernova explosion of love. 18 00:01:26,962 --> 00:01:30,299 Wait. Oh, that's a really pretty image. 19 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:31,633 Rewind. 20 00:01:31,842 --> 00:01:33,176 Let's go to the beginning of me. 21 00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:59,304 Hey, Liam. Hey. Liam? 22 00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:02,641 Okay, what are your obstacles for tomorrow's exam? Go. 23 00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:05,644 Uh, sometimes I get lazy with my handwriting and my Y's look like J's. 24 00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:07,396 - Yes. - I can do better. I can do better. 25 00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:09,981 Mom, uh... And I get nervous sweats. 26 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:11,858 Go to Cambridge, study with Stephen Hawking, 27 00:03:12,067 --> 00:03:14,361 become the second-most famous astronomer of all time. 28 00:03:14,569 --> 00:03:15,862 Honey, I think you can become most famous. 29 00:03:16,071 --> 00:03:17,823 I mean, it's Stephen Hawking, come on. 30 00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:19,533 Hot hint for today's practice exam, 31 00:03:19,741 --> 00:03:21,159 it's just a practice. 32 00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:23,537 But tomorrow, not too much water pre-exam. 33 00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:25,122 - Why not? - Too many bathroom breaks. 34 00:03:25,330 --> 00:03:27,040 - Right. - Okay. 35 00:03:27,249 --> 00:03:28,417 Batter up. Ready? 36 00:03:28,625 --> 00:03:29,835 I'm already a little bit excited. 37 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,420 - Yeah. - Yeah, look, I'm sweating. 38 00:03:31,628 --> 00:03:33,046 - Really? - Looks like excite sweat. 39 00:03:33,255 --> 00:03:34,172 - That's fun. - You wanna feel it? 40 00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:35,173 Yeah. 41 00:03:35,382 --> 00:03:36,883 Ew! Okay. 42 00:03:38,135 --> 00:03:39,845 All right. Ready? 43 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:42,139 You may begin... now. 44 00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:55,986 Oh, nuts! 45 00:03:57,487 --> 00:03:59,406 - Can I sharpen my pencil? - Yes. 46 00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:05,036 We should get you a good mechanical pencil. 47 00:04:18,341 --> 00:04:19,551 - Really? - Mmm-hmm. 48 00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:22,596 - Let's celebrate! - Okay. 49 00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:24,139 Wiggles] - I am. 50 00:04:24,347 --> 00:04:25,348 What do you mean? 51 00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:26,641 -L'm celebrating. - When? 52 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,020 - Right now. - Now? 53 00:04:30,228 --> 00:04:31,521 - Right now. - You're celebrating right now? 54 00:04:31,730 --> 00:04:33,148 Yep. 55 00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:35,609 Well, we can really celebrate at prom tomorrow night. 56 00:04:35,817 --> 00:04:38,111 Are you excited? We can really cut loose. 57 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:40,071 Yeah, I was thinking of maybe just doing some silent reading. 58 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:41,448 Liam! 59 00:04:41,656 --> 00:04:43,074 When you graduate, you have to have a prom. 60 00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:44,451 It's a rite of passage. 61 00:04:44,659 --> 00:04:45,452 Who did you invite? 62 00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:48,580 YOU? 63 00:04:48,789 --> 00:04:50,791 Well, of course I'm gonna be there, sweetie. 64 00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:52,834 - My best friend. - You know what? 65 00:04:53,043 --> 00:04:54,961 I love you infinity. 66 00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:56,296 Go outside and play, kiddo. 67 00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:18,485 Okay. 68 00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:20,570 Okay, now remember, always put down an answer 69 00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:22,155 even if you don't know the answer. 70 00:05:22,364 --> 00:05:23,782 And start with the easiest questions first, 71 00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:25,408 and then move on to the hardest questions, 72 00:05:25,617 --> 00:05:27,035 because that way you'll leave yourself more time 73 00:05:27,244 --> 00:05:27,994 for the things you don't know 74 00:05:28,203 --> 00:05:29,204 and you won't stress out 75 00:05:29,412 --> 00:05:30,622 about the things that you do know, 76 00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:31,832 because you'll be freaking out about 77 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:34,000 some of the harder questions. 78 00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:35,585 Liam? 79 00:05:35,794 --> 00:05:38,213 Wow, there are so many students! 80 00:05:38,421 --> 00:05:39,840 Honey, focus. 81 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,925 - Focus, okay? - Yeah. 82 00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:44,094 Ugh! I had to go to this school. 83 00:05:44,302 --> 00:05:46,972 I had to go to this school for stupid people, but you don't. 84 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:49,099 You're going to Cambridge, because you are special 85 00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:50,392 and you're perfect, all right? 86 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:51,393 Remember that. 87 00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:52,894 Now we put you in layers, 88 00:05:53,103 --> 00:05:54,563 because if it gets cold, you can put 'em back on. 89 00:05:54,771 --> 00:05:56,398 When you get hot, you can take 'em off. 90 00:05:56,606 --> 00:05:58,984 Okay, and don't, like, look all, like, up in the sky 91 00:05:59,192 --> 00:06:00,402 back and forth like Stevie Wonder 92 00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:01,820 if you don't know the answer, 93 00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:03,446 because they will nail your butt for cheating. 94 00:06:03,655 --> 00:06:05,031 They will. Okay? 95 00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:07,784 Now, when you pass this test, 96 00:06:07,993 --> 00:06:08,994 you are a high school graduate. 97 00:06:12,414 --> 00:06:14,207 Okay, go! Go get 'em! 98 00:06:17,544 --> 00:06:19,087 What? Oh! 99 00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:30,015 Hi, Autumn. 100 00:06:31,766 --> 00:06:32,934 Hi, Liam. 101 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:35,812 Meet Autumn. 102 00:06:36,021 --> 00:06:37,230 She runs a not-for-profit 103 00:06:37,439 --> 00:06:38,732 that protests cruelty to snails. 104 00:06:48,617 --> 00:06:50,660 All this training for you, my dear. 105 00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:53,580 And you can begin... 106 00:06:57,751 --> 00:06:59,044 now. 107 00:07:02,297 --> 00:07:05,425 Only losers get 97 fricking percent. 108 00:07:05,634 --> 00:07:06,718 I've been here all morning. 109 00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,303 Autumn insisted that we come early. 110 00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:09,596 Gross. 111 00:07:09,804 --> 00:07:11,264 You know, Autumn's been requesting 112 00:07:11,473 --> 00:07:12,974 we do a unit on Bolivian weaving. 113 00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:15,352 - Hmm. - She can't get enough of it. Get this. 114 00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:18,730 She made a traditional Bolivian flat-knot for me. 115 00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,565 I've been using it as a phone case. 116 00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:22,651 Liam is obsessed with black holes. 117 00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:24,736 - I love it when you do that. - Thank you. 118 00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:26,321 Do you want me to talk dirty? 119 00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,198 Yes. 120 00:07:28,406 --> 00:07:29,824 Looks like we're gonna need a new trophy case, huh? 121 00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:31,284 These aren't trophies. 122 00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:32,911 They're just awards for participation. 123 00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:38,208 We have a very high rate of participation. 124 00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:41,586 It's Dumbo. Participation's mandatory, not award-worthy. 125 00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:45,256 Well, at this school, it's award-worthy, you know. 126 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:46,341 I'm the principal. 127 00:07:46,549 --> 00:07:47,968 - Okay. - That's nice. 128 00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:49,469 Normally that impresses people. 129 00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:51,137 My name's on this one. 130 00:07:51,346 --> 00:07:53,181 It's a participation award for the debate club. 131 00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:55,392 Oh, yeah. There you go. Yeah. Hey, congrats. 132 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:57,519 Thanks. I got pregnant on that field trip. 133 00:07:57,727 --> 00:08:00,105 That's quite a bit of participation. 134 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:01,940 I have a son. I home-school him. 135 00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,400 Home-school kids. 136 00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:05,193 - Normally that impresses people. - Yeah. 137 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:08,863 Well, hey, next time you're here, 138 00:08:09,072 --> 00:08:10,991 we'll setup an appointment and we'll talk curriculum. Yeah? 139 00:08:11,199 --> 00:08:12,701 Okay, great. We'll probably never be here again, though. 140 00:08:12,909 --> 00:08:14,369 - Okay. - Ugh! 141 00:08:14,577 --> 00:08:16,830 That was the closest I've been to sex in a while. 142 00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:18,456 Me, too. 143 00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:19,624 You know, the kids here are getting way more than me, 144 00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:21,334 like circle-jerk parties at 13! 145 00:08:21,543 --> 00:08:25,797 Yeah. That's why I'm going with Liam to Cambridge, 146 00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:28,049 to protect him from getting derailed. 147 00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:29,884 Autumn's not getting derailed without me. 148 00:08:30,093 --> 00:08:32,679 No one's having sex with those kids but us. 149 00:08:32,887 --> 00:08:34,097 Around. 150 00:08:34,305 --> 00:08:35,598 - Yes. - Or nearby at least. 151 00:08:37,058 --> 00:08:38,518 'Etimer b e8 was! ps1 152 00:08:38,727 --> 00:08:39,894 Fifty-three minutes left. 153 00:08:40,103 --> 00:08:42,605 Good Job, Liam. Pat on the back. 154 00:08:52,657 --> 00:08:53,533 What? All done? 155 00:08:53,742 --> 00:08:55,118 It's impossible. 156 00:08:55,326 --> 00:08:56,911 Apparently it is not. 157 00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,663 Uh, you should know that someone wrote on the desk 158 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,749 with permanent marker, "You're a dirty cocksucker." 159 00:09:00,957 --> 00:09:02,834 I'm not a dirty cocksucker. 160 00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,294 It wasn't me. 161 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:24,147 The light from the Quanta 6 supernova 162 00:09:24,355 --> 00:09:26,399 is probably hitting Earth right now. 163 00:09:28,318 --> 00:09:31,154 Wow! Crazy! 164 00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:55,678 Can I get my test back? 165 00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:57,263 - Yeah, what's your name? -lt's Liam Heap. 166 00:09:57,472 --> 00:09:58,431 It's right there. It's the only one there. 167 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:00,141 Right. 168 00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:02,185 You're the kid that called me "the dirty cocksucker." 169 00:10:02,393 --> 00:10:04,437 That wasn't me. Somebody wrote it on the desk. 170 00:10:04,646 --> 00:10:05,855 You kids start these nasty rumors 171 00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:08,399 about me and Tony, the Phys. Ed. teacher, 172 00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:11,027 because you see me and Tony hanging at lunch, shooting hoops? 173 00:10:11,236 --> 00:10:12,320 Well, all right, yeah. 174 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:16,449 I had been with a man, and it was Tony. 175 00:10:16,658 --> 00:10:19,160 But I'm... I'm not a dirty cocksucker. 176 00:10:19,369 --> 00:10:21,371 Can I just have my test back, please? 177 00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:24,082 Okay. 178 00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:42,142 You double-aced it, right? I mean, you did, right? 179 00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:43,852 You did. I can tell. 180 00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:46,980 Ooh! It's written all over your superb little face. 181 00:10:47,188 --> 00:10:49,566 I almost think we should get ice cream. 182 00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:51,234 Almost. 183 00:10:51,442 --> 00:10:52,861 You know what else I was thinking? 184 00:10:54,946 --> 00:10:57,365 I was thinking today... 185 00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:00,994 um, I'm gonna go to Cambridge with you. 186 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,580 I mean, why not? 187 00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:06,332 You're gonna be there all by yourself. Right? 188 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:08,334 Right? 189 00:11:10,128 --> 00:11:12,088 Oh, well, it's locked and zippered. 190 00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:13,631 Well, let's just... 191 00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:15,717 Oh, wait. Hold on one second. 192 00:11:15,925 --> 00:11:17,510 I have the key! 193 00:11:17,719 --> 00:11:18,970 So I will... 194 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,514 Oh, wow! It is not budging the vault. 195 00:11:21,723 --> 00:11:22,599 I see. 196 00:11:22,807 --> 00:11:23,725 It's the wrong key, Mom. 197 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:31,024 Cambridge. Oh, God! University life. 198 00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,984 Hey, you got any hotties coming in? 199 00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:34,819 No, I don't have any girlfriends here. 200 00:11:37,071 --> 00:11:38,239 Hey, what's that? 201 00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:39,991 My friend book. 202 00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:43,203 It's like online, but not online. 203 00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:46,080 As you can see, the top two spaces are solidly filled, 204 00:11:46,289 --> 00:11:48,625 but the third is up for grabs. 205 00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:50,752 If you're interested, I can put you down. 206 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,421 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, put me down there. 207 00:11:53,630 --> 00:11:55,131 That list should fill up and go viral. 208 00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:58,009 Okay. I would really like to cut in. 209 00:11:58,218 --> 00:11:59,010 All right, he's all yours. 210 00:11:59,219 --> 00:11:59,844 - Okay. - Thanks. 211 00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:02,096 Come here, you. 212 00:12:02,305 --> 00:12:04,933 - This is nice. - Yeah. 213 00:12:06,309 --> 00:12:07,602 I feel like a pretty cool kid. 214 00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:09,896 You are such a cool kid. 215 00:12:10,104 --> 00:12:11,731 I hope this is a long song, 'cause Grandma 216 00:12:11,940 --> 00:12:14,234 is chomping at the bit to dance with you. 217 00:12:14,442 --> 00:12:16,361 You look like a real man today, Liam. 218 00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:27,538 What? 219 00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:53,147 Good night! 220 00:12:55,817 --> 00:12:56,651 Good night, Mom! 221 00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:21,676 - Go ahead, open it. - You already did. 222 00:13:21,884 --> 00:13:23,303 Read it. 223 00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:25,346 - Do you know what that means? - That you opened it? 224 00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:27,765 What else? 225 00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:29,642 That I didn't graduate high school? 226 00:13:29,851 --> 00:13:32,854 No. You failed! 227 00:13:33,062 --> 00:13:36,399 You failed home-school! You failed us! 228 00:13:36,607 --> 00:13:38,651 Look, I can take the test again in four months. 229 00:13:38,860 --> 00:13:42,363 There must be some kind of error. 6% in physics? 230 00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:44,741 Physics, Liam. You own physics! 231 00:13:44,949 --> 00:13:46,200 Technically, I don't own physics. 232 00:13:46,409 --> 00:13:47,368 Technically, physics owns me. 233 00:13:47,577 --> 00:13:49,412 How can you get 6%? 234 00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:51,789 - I caved. - Caved how? 235 00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:53,458 Under intense high school pressures. 236 00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:54,709 Bull crap! 237 00:13:54,917 --> 00:13:56,377 You know this stuff. 238 00:13:56,586 --> 00:13:58,379 This is why you've been such a hush-hush bug. What... 239 00:13:58,588 --> 00:13:59,839 What is it? 240 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:02,633 - Those questions were hard. - Bull crap! 241 00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:04,469 And plus, females. 242 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:06,637 I got all frightened, and tingly, and-- 243 00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:07,638 Whoa. 244 00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:11,768 Hold the telephone. 245 00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:15,855 You're rebelling. 246 00:14:17,106 --> 00:14:18,733 That's what this is. 247 00:14:18,941 --> 00:14:21,444 Oh, my God! I can't... I can't even look at your face. 248 00:14:21,652 --> 00:14:23,029 You're rebelling so much. I can't. 249 00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:24,155 - Mom. - No. 250 00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:25,281 - Mom, look at me. - No. 251 00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:27,367 - Mom, look at my face. - No! No! 252 00:14:27,575 --> 00:14:32,413 Look. Mom! I saw some things that I have never seen before. 253 00:14:33,790 --> 00:14:34,749 I think I need to fess up here. 254 00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:36,459 Yeah. 255 00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:39,379 I was thinking that maybe I might make the decision 256 00:14:39,587 --> 00:14:43,049 that it's kinda time for me to maybe go to public school. 257 00:14:46,052 --> 00:14:49,013 Public school? Are you trying to kill me? 258 00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:51,474 Liam, I have taught you more in days 259 00:14:51,682 --> 00:14:53,142 than they could teach you in years! 260 00:14:53,351 --> 00:14:54,727 Public school? 261 00:14:54,936 --> 00:14:56,687 - Mom, I don't know what to say. - Baloney! 262 00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:58,231 What 12-year-old boy 263 00:14:58,439 --> 00:15:01,275 teaches blind kids to read Braille in Cambodia? 264 00:15:01,484 --> 00:15:03,403 You are a man of the world! 265 00:15:04,695 --> 00:15:06,072 Baby, I don't get it. 266 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:08,074 Can you just give me... Give me ten reasons! 267 00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:51,492 I'm sorry. 268 00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:57,457 Now I just wanna be clear right off the bat. 269 00:15:57,665 --> 00:16:00,460 This is school, right? 270 00:16:00,668 --> 00:16:02,044 We're not just sitting around the house 271 00:16:02,253 --> 00:16:05,173 learning about pirates and making volcanoes. 272 00:16:05,381 --> 00:16:08,259 This school is serious. 273 00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:13,306 As in serious gangs and serious drugs. Yeah. 274 00:16:13,514 --> 00:16:14,807 Sometimes I don't even wanna walk down the halls. 275 00:16:15,016 --> 00:16:17,560 Some of these guys are packing heat. 276 00:16:17,768 --> 00:16:20,480 I mean, take for example, Maria Sanchez. She's... 277 00:16:21,856 --> 00:16:23,065 Yeah, just like you, 278 00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:24,901 straight A's, sweet kid. 279 00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:28,196 But unfortunately, she just took a leave. 280 00:16:28,404 --> 00:16:29,614 - Because of the drugs? - No. 281 00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:32,533 She's got a lung thing. Or no, it's a... 282 00:16:32,742 --> 00:16:34,285 It's a brain thing. It's one or the other. 283 00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:37,830 It's... I've got it here. I got it here somewhere. 284 00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:39,790 What's happening? What's that? 285 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:42,460 I don't... Okay, I don't... 286 00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:45,046 You know, it's a zoo here, okay? 287 00:16:45,254 --> 00:16:47,423 We've got over 2,000 students. 288 00:16:47,632 --> 00:16:50,760 Right. Well, we tried. Let's go. 289 00:16:50,968 --> 00:16:52,970 What if I took the sick girl's spot? 290 00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:54,764 What are you getting at, kid? 291 00:16:54,972 --> 00:16:58,309 Well, if Maria Sanchez is sick, then I can take her seat, 292 00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:00,311 her classes, I can do her homework. 293 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:01,729 I mean, you have a free space 294 00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:04,690 to experience high school for one week. 295 00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:06,817 That would save me a lot of paperwork. 296 00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:08,653 You can't really do that, though. Can you? 297 00:17:08,861 --> 00:17:10,863 Yeah. No. I mean, I can do anything 298 00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:13,491 with a memo. Just... 299 00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:17,078 Yeah, Liam can slide right 300 00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:20,498 into Maria's slot 301 00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:24,126 and take-- take her place from the... 302 00:17:24,335 --> 00:17:26,587 Um, let's see. 303 00:17:26,796 --> 00:17:29,173 Yeah, go to her classes, sit at her desk, do her assignments. 304 00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:31,467 This is her class. That's her class schedule. 305 00:17:31,676 --> 00:17:34,720 And you're gonna need this. This is her ID. 306 00:17:34,929 --> 00:17:37,640 Modern dance and Phys. Ed. ls that necessary? 307 00:17:37,848 --> 00:17:42,728 Yeah. Maria Sanchez is one of our top learners. 308 00:17:42,937 --> 00:17:45,690 This looks like a community center schedule, 309 00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:50,570 or some kind of assisted living center schedule. 310 00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:57,743 A little independence. 311 00:17:57,952 --> 00:17:59,036 It's good for you. 312 00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:01,289 This is so hard. 313 00:18:01,497 --> 00:18:02,456 I know. 314 00:18:03,833 --> 00:18:05,960 - Do you have your key? - Yeah. 315 00:18:06,168 --> 00:18:08,713 - Okay. And your cell? - Oh, yeah. It's... 316 00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,881 Okay. Right, one last hug. 317 00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:12,883 Okay, final hug. Go. 318 00:18:17,888 --> 00:18:20,057 Okay, hug break. 319 00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:22,059 We're stuck together, you and me. 320 00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,395 - Yeah, forever. - Forever. 321 00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:25,980 - Well, not forever. - No, forever. 322 00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:27,481 -Okay. -Okay. 323 00:18:29,066 --> 00:18:30,026 Okay! 324 00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:46,959 Hey. 325 00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:50,921 - Who're you? - Hello. 326 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,923 My name's Liam Heap. I'm here for a week 327 00:18:53,132 --> 00:18:54,884 to win over the one-legged girl. 328 00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:57,136 And I'm filling in for Maria Sanchez. 329 00:18:57,345 --> 00:18:58,304 This is her locker? 330 00:18:58,512 --> 00:19:00,890 Yeah, Maria is my locker buddy, 331 00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:02,808 and you're not getting the combo. 332 00:19:03,017 --> 00:19:04,560 See, I got my trophies in there. 333 00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:07,104 Okay, you may not recognize me, 334 00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:08,814 but I am the reigning champ 335 00:19:09,023 --> 00:19:10,941 at the Cherry Rock High Halloween Contest, 336 00:19:11,150 --> 00:19:12,401 four years in a row. 337 00:19:12,610 --> 00:19:13,653 Four years. 338 00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:16,155 I got last year, the year before that, 339 00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:18,157 the year before that, and the year before that. 340 00:19:18,366 --> 00:19:19,700 You know what I'm saying? 341 00:19:19,909 --> 00:19:21,994 That means that I am the bar. 342 00:19:22,203 --> 00:19:23,120 Yeah. 343 00:19:26,415 --> 00:19:27,875 You like Rigoberto Bianco? 344 00:19:28,084 --> 00:19:30,294 Yeah, is he a wizard or... 345 00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:33,631 No, no. He's like a... He's like a Spanish Michael Bolton. 346 00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,765 Look, I'm here on a mission. 347 00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:47,019 Right, the one-legged wonder girl. 348 00:19:47,228 --> 00:19:50,481 I swear, there's a new guy in here every term chasing after her. 349 00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,441 You know, she never told anybody what happened to her leg. 350 00:19:52,650 --> 00:19:53,734 She saves that. 351 00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:55,778 It's legend. 352 00:19:57,947 --> 00:19:59,031 Anyway, just to be clear... 353 00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:02,451 we're not gonna be friends. 354 00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:03,828 I got enough friends. 355 00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:06,872 Right. 356 00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:28,310 - Corey. - Here. 357 00:20:28,519 --> 00:20:29,770 - Stephanie. - Present. 358 00:20:31,355 --> 00:20:32,273 Justine. 359 00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:35,025 Wow! Same class. 360 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:39,697 Looking at her was like looking at Arp 273, the rose of galaxies. 361 00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:46,704 Anastasia. 362 00:20:46,912 --> 00:20:49,165 - Rider. - Anastasia. 363 00:20:49,373 --> 00:20:50,916 - George. - Present. 364 00:20:51,125 --> 00:20:52,334 Maria. 365 00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:53,627 Maria Sanchez. 366 00:20:53,836 --> 00:20:55,045 Oh, uh, here. 367 00:21:03,053 --> 00:21:04,930 Can I help you, Mr. Teacher? 368 00:21:05,139 --> 00:21:06,640 Maria's five-second rule experiment. 369 00:21:06,849 --> 00:21:08,309 I expect it at the end of the term. 370 00:21:08,517 --> 00:21:11,061 No, um, actually, I'm not Maria Sanchez. 371 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,689 I'm just here for a week. I'm home-schooled. 372 00:21:13,898 --> 00:21:14,940 Aren't we all? 373 00:21:18,360 --> 00:21:20,488 - Sarah. - Here. 374 00:21:20,696 --> 00:21:21,614 Harry. 375 00:21:24,325 --> 00:21:25,659 No. 376 00:21:25,868 --> 00:21:26,911 - No. - Honey? 377 00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:28,496 Not in a classroom. 378 00:21:28,704 --> 00:21:29,872 - It's my mom. - Liam, are you there? 379 00:21:31,499 --> 00:21:34,168 Hola, mi nombre es Maria Sanchez. 380 00:21:35,628 --> 00:21:37,296 No, I'm Maria Sanchez. 381 00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:39,882 She has, like, a lung or a brain thing. It's pretty bad. 382 00:22:19,964 --> 00:22:22,633 J"Ah 383 00:22:25,594 --> 00:22:28,180 J"Ah 384 00:22:48,909 --> 00:22:49,952 on! 385 00:22:57,084 --> 00:22:58,210 Hi, penis breath. 386 00:22:58,419 --> 00:22:59,795 Where's Maria? 387 00:23:00,004 --> 00:23:03,090 Oh, she's sick with a lung and a brain thing. 388 00:23:03,299 --> 00:23:05,551 It's at... My name is actually not "penis breath," it's Liam. 389 00:23:05,759 --> 00:23:07,177 I'm BDC. 390 00:23:07,386 --> 00:23:11,015 - BDC? - Brian Denis Chad. 391 00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:13,309 That's like three first names, sort of. 392 00:23:13,517 --> 00:23:16,562 No. That's a first, middle, and last. 393 00:23:16,770 --> 00:23:18,689 Yeah, in that... In your case, yeah. 394 00:23:24,987 --> 00:23:28,324 Earthquake, Maria! 395 00:23:30,075 --> 00:23:30,743 Good. 396 00:23:57,519 --> 00:23:59,355 Hello! 397 00:23:59,563 --> 00:24:02,232 Liam, hello. Honey, is everything all right? 398 00:24:03,734 --> 00:24:06,487 Liam? Hello? 399 00:24:06,695 --> 00:24:09,740 Hey, Mom. No, it's fine. 400 00:24:09,949 --> 00:24:12,076 It was a wrong number. Sorry, I didn't mean to call you. 401 00:24:12,284 --> 00:24:14,328 Oh. Okay, I love you, sweetie. 402 00:24:14,536 --> 00:24:15,955 I love you, too. Bye. 403 00:24:33,973 --> 00:24:36,684 You're an even bigger nerd than me. 404 00:24:36,892 --> 00:24:41,271 Oh, yeah, I just figured I'd warm my pants up. Toasty. 405 00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:45,776 Oh, I forget to tell you BDC is an asshole. 406 00:24:45,985 --> 00:24:47,987 Yeah, I figured that out. 407 00:24:48,195 --> 00:24:50,531 So, what? Everybody calls me "Maria" now? 408 00:24:50,739 --> 00:24:54,451 It's caught on pretty fast. I mean, your name's Maria now. 409 00:24:54,660 --> 00:24:56,203 It's pretty. Work with it. 410 00:25:06,422 --> 00:25:10,050 Hey, new kid on the block. 411 00:25:17,307 --> 00:25:19,143 - She has a limp? - Yeah. 412 00:25:19,351 --> 00:25:22,396 A real irregular gait. Not weird, just irregular, 413 00:25:22,604 --> 00:25:24,606 like she puts all of her movement onto her strongest leg. 414 00:25:24,815 --> 00:25:27,568 Kinda like one of those gimpy dogs that has all that courage. 415 00:25:27,776 --> 00:25:30,362 Liam, are you sure that this girl is real? 416 00:25:30,571 --> 00:25:32,906 She kinda reminds me of a cyborg, but she's very real. 417 00:25:33,115 --> 00:25:35,451 - Did she say anything else to you? - Yeah, I told you. 418 00:25:35,659 --> 00:25:38,579 She looked at me and then she smiled like this. 419 00:25:38,787 --> 00:25:41,123 And then she said, "Ooh, hello there, you." 420 00:25:43,375 --> 00:25:46,295 - I think she likes you. - Whoa! 421 00:25:46,503 --> 00:25:48,213 Okay, uh, 422 00:25:48,422 --> 00:25:51,800 wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow! 423 00:25:52,009 --> 00:25:55,095 Uh, I don't know. That's... Mmm, okay. 424 00:25:55,304 --> 00:25:57,014 I knew this would happen. 425 00:25:57,222 --> 00:25:59,641 I mean, if I'd had a girl, she would stay with me forever, 426 00:25:59,850 --> 00:26:01,643 like, even after she got married. 427 00:26:01,852 --> 00:26:05,064 But a guy like you, meet a girl and then you're gone. 428 00:26:05,272 --> 00:26:07,232 - What? That's not true. - Yeah, it is true. 429 00:26:07,441 --> 00:26:09,276 Grandma warned me it was gonna happen, and she was right. 430 00:26:09,485 --> 00:26:12,780 Grandma, that's not true. Mom, you're my best friend. 431 00:26:14,031 --> 00:26:15,783 I love you infinity. 432 00:26:15,991 --> 00:26:18,827 - That's a long time. - Yeah, it's the most. 433 00:26:27,669 --> 00:26:29,463 It wasn't until the next day 434 00:26:29,671 --> 00:26:33,926 that I realized in that one minute between 1:44 and 1:45, 435 00:26:34,134 --> 00:26:37,054 right near the southwest handicapped bathroom, 436 00:26:37,262 --> 00:26:38,305 we would pass each other. 437 00:26:38,514 --> 00:26:39,515 Hi! 438 00:26:41,016 --> 00:26:43,102 Every day. 439 00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:51,026 Hello. 440 00:26:54,488 --> 00:26:55,906 Hey! 441 00:26:58,325 --> 00:26:59,576 Hey! 442 00:27:10,087 --> 00:27:11,130 Whoo! 443 00:27:19,221 --> 00:27:22,558 Are you... Can I ask? 444 00:27:22,766 --> 00:27:25,435 - Mmm-hmm. Yeah. - We haven't really talked about this. 445 00:27:25,644 --> 00:27:27,312 I just feel like you're moving so fast already. 446 00:27:28,981 --> 00:27:30,232 Are you thinking about sleeping with her? 447 00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:32,484 Oh, Mom! I mean, Grandma's right here. 448 00:27:32,693 --> 00:27:34,570 She's eating. She's not listening. 449 00:27:34,778 --> 00:27:37,489 - Grandma, you want a fire truck? - Yes, dear. 450 00:27:37,698 --> 00:27:38,991 Okay, so, are you thinking of sex? 451 00:27:40,826 --> 00:27:42,452 Yes, honey. 452 00:27:42,661 --> 00:27:44,788 - No, Mom, I'm talking to Liam. - I mean, no. 453 00:27:44,997 --> 00:27:46,790 No, I mean, I was sort of thinking about touching her leg, 454 00:27:46,999 --> 00:27:49,126 touching her leg at school is sort of like a legend, so... 455 00:27:49,334 --> 00:27:52,212 Liam, I'm not stupid. No one celebrates virginity. 456 00:27:52,421 --> 00:27:53,255 I mean, we should. 457 00:27:54,756 --> 00:27:56,508 - High five! - Right? 458 00:27:56,717 --> 00:27:58,886 Yeah! Now, I know I'm a mom, 459 00:27:59,094 --> 00:28:01,471 but I know you boys think about it, 460 00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:03,974 I change your sheets, and I know the pressure you put on yourselves, 461 00:28:04,183 --> 00:28:05,893 but listen, I mean, 462 00:28:06,101 --> 00:28:09,396 you guys have gone so far already that I think, you know, 463 00:28:09,605 --> 00:28:10,814 I think she might be... 464 00:28:12,065 --> 00:28:13,525 -a bit of a whore. - Whoa! 465 00:28:13,734 --> 00:28:15,485 - I mean, I hate that I had to say that. 466 00:28:17,571 --> 00:28:19,281 You know, I think maybe I should eat lunch in the cafeteria. 467 00:28:19,489 --> 00:28:21,325 So you can have lunch with the one-legged girl? 468 00:28:21,533 --> 00:28:23,452 Well, it just doesn't seem like a lot of other moms 469 00:28:23,660 --> 00:28:25,120 are here with their kids at school. 470 00:28:25,329 --> 00:28:27,122 That cafeteria serves homeless-person food. 471 00:28:27,331 --> 00:28:29,166 I'm adding years to your life here. 472 00:28:29,374 --> 00:28:31,710 Well, I just feel like maybe I should eat lunch with the other students. 473 00:28:31,919 --> 00:28:33,670 If you were having lunch with a guy, I'd be fine with that. 474 00:28:33,879 --> 00:28:35,505 You'd be fine if your mom was dude-dating? 475 00:28:35,714 --> 00:28:36,840 Yeah, yeah, I would. 476 00:28:37,049 --> 00:28:38,800 I mean, if he was a nice gentleman. 477 00:28:39,009 --> 00:28:41,303 - Okay, but-- - I'm not allowed to have sugar. 478 00:28:41,511 --> 00:28:44,014 No, you can have sugar. 479 00:28:44,223 --> 00:28:47,726 I don't care. Makes you grumpy-pants, but... Whatever. 480 00:28:47,935 --> 00:28:50,395 Okay. Well, I'm gonna stealth out of the car and you're not gonna be able to see me 481 00:28:50,604 --> 00:28:51,647 'cause I'm gonna be so stealthy. Ninja. 482 00:28:54,274 --> 00:28:55,943 Liam, you left the door open! 483 00:28:59,154 --> 00:29:00,906 God damn it! 484 00:29:02,950 --> 00:29:06,328 Ugh! Dang it! 485 00:29:10,874 --> 00:29:11,833 Ugh! 486 00:29:29,935 --> 00:29:31,061 Oh! Hey, Maria. 487 00:29:31,270 --> 00:29:33,897 I actually just called you last night 488 00:29:34,106 --> 00:29:37,609 and I got some Spanish Antonio Banderas guy. 489 00:29:37,818 --> 00:29:40,320 - Is that your dad? - No, that's probably Maria's number. 490 00:29:40,529 --> 00:29:41,947 - Oh, yeah! Right. I didn't-- - Spanish, yeah. 491 00:29:42,155 --> 00:29:43,365 I don't speak Spanish, so I didn't... 492 00:29:43,573 --> 00:29:44,783 Didn't occur to me, yeah. 493 00:29:44,992 --> 00:29:46,493 Oh! Uh, shoot, I better go. 494 00:29:46,702 --> 00:29:48,328 I have to say hi to a girl. 495 00:29:48,537 --> 00:29:49,538 Yeah, me, too. Oh, hey! One second. 496 00:29:49,746 --> 00:29:50,539 I actually do need your number, 497 00:29:50,747 --> 00:29:51,748 your mother's number. 498 00:29:51,957 --> 00:29:53,166 Oh, okay. 499 00:29:53,375 --> 00:29:55,961 Oh, okay, now, I can call this nu... 500 00:29:56,169 --> 00:29:57,629 I can speak to your... 501 00:29:57,838 --> 00:30:00,173 - To your... Your dad? - Nope, just my mom. 502 00:30:00,382 --> 00:30:02,384 Fuck yeah! Okay. Yeah, it's just procedural stuff. 503 00:30:02,592 --> 00:30:04,594 I figured out that at 1:58 p.m., 504 00:30:04,803 --> 00:30:06,596 if I cut through the gym to the east hall, 505 00:30:06,805 --> 00:30:09,224 I would pass her again, get one more hello. 506 00:30:19,401 --> 00:30:22,321 Oh, hey! Deja vu. 507 00:30:27,868 --> 00:30:29,202 - Hey! - Hey! 508 00:30:29,411 --> 00:30:31,538 Hey! You ready to go home, bucko? 509 00:30:31,747 --> 00:30:34,333 Actually, I have badminton practice. 510 00:30:34,541 --> 00:30:38,128 Badminton? What? But you've done the week. We said one week. 511 00:30:38,337 --> 00:30:40,339 Yeah, the badminton team needs me. 512 00:30:41,590 --> 00:30:44,718 Sanchez. Bad. 513 00:30:46,303 --> 00:30:48,638 So I'm just gonna go practice after 514 00:30:48,847 --> 00:30:52,225 and then maybe just a few more months of school. 515 00:30:52,434 --> 00:30:54,478 A few more months? Are you joking? 516 00:30:54,686 --> 00:30:57,606 I just maybe feel like I needed to adjust, 517 00:30:57,814 --> 00:31:00,525 and then I'll rewrite the exam and I'll double-ace it, 518 00:31:00,734 --> 00:31:02,694 and I'll go to Cambridge and I'll study with Stephen Hawking. 519 00:31:02,903 --> 00:31:04,988 It's just a little bit of badminton at school. It's fine. 520 00:31:05,197 --> 00:31:06,573 Jump in the car and we'll talk. 521 00:31:06,782 --> 00:31:08,825 Well, I have to practice right now, like right now. 522 00:31:09,034 --> 00:31:10,619 But the... It's fish Friday! 523 00:31:12,579 --> 00:31:14,831 - It is? - Well, it's Friday. 524 00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:16,958 - Well, what kinda fish? - Rainbow trout. 525 00:31:18,377 --> 00:31:20,045 No, I... Sorry, I gotta go to badminton. 526 00:31:20,253 --> 00:31:21,963 Sorry, Mom. I love you. Bye, save some for me. 527 00:31:31,598 --> 00:31:33,350 What are you doing here? 528 00:31:33,558 --> 00:31:34,684 Badminton. You? 529 00:31:34,893 --> 00:31:37,354 Badminton. Where'd you get that? 530 00:31:37,562 --> 00:31:39,898 - Over there. -lt's game. 531 00:31:40,107 --> 00:31:41,650 - When... What? -lt's game. 532 00:31:41,858 --> 00:31:43,402 - What do you mean? -lt's lingo. 533 00:31:43,610 --> 00:31:47,072 - Lingo for the game? - No, lingo for the racket. 534 00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:48,907 The racket is game. 535 00:31:54,079 --> 00:31:55,080 Who are they? 536 00:32:04,589 --> 00:32:06,550 They're the angels of death. 537 00:32:19,896 --> 00:32:22,107 - Liam? - No, this is Mr. Kelly, the principal. 538 00:32:22,315 --> 00:32:26,528 Uh, Listen, I know your boy, Maria-- 539 00:32:26,736 --> 00:32:28,613 Liam. His name is Liam. ls he okay? 540 00:32:28,822 --> 00:32:31,450 Right. Yeah, of course, he goes by Liam at home. 541 00:32:31,658 --> 00:32:33,660 Yeah, no, he's fine, he's okay. 542 00:32:33,869 --> 00:32:38,790 Uh, like, I understand him staying on. You know, off the record, um, 543 00:32:38,999 --> 00:32:44,129 I'm single, and, you know, I remember the other week you came by and you, 544 00:32:44,337 --> 00:32:46,089 uh, over by the trophy case, you were asking me 545 00:32:46,298 --> 00:32:48,133 if I was impressed with your homeschooling 546 00:32:48,341 --> 00:32:50,719 and I just wanted to say, "Yeah, I am." 547 00:32:53,430 --> 00:32:54,931 What? 548 00:32:55,140 --> 00:32:56,391 lam. Hello? 549 00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,811 - Is that... - Uh! 550 00:33:00,020 --> 00:33:01,480 Uh... 551 00:33:03,356 --> 00:33:07,569 Mmm-mmm... Hmm... 552 00:33:07,777 --> 00:33:09,279 Mmm, mmm, mmm... 553 00:33:09,488 --> 00:33:11,823 Oh! 554 00:33:36,264 --> 00:33:37,766 Maria, I swear to God. 555 00:33:42,562 --> 00:33:43,730 Come on! 556 00:33:50,111 --> 00:33:52,614 - Nice game, Maria. - Hit the showers, boys. 557 00:33:54,991 --> 00:33:57,410 Yeah, right. I shower alone. 558 00:34:04,876 --> 00:34:08,380 Ah! I'm like the moon or something 559 00:34:08,588 --> 00:34:10,757 slowly moving away from Mother Earth. 560 00:34:10,966 --> 00:34:13,009 3.87 centimeters a year, actually. 561 00:34:13,218 --> 00:34:14,678 It's a thing. It really is. 562 00:34:19,891 --> 00:34:21,101 Thanks for the fish. 563 00:34:25,313 --> 00:34:26,147 Yeah, sure. 564 00:34:32,779 --> 00:34:35,282 I love you infinity. 565 00:34:54,175 --> 00:34:56,553 - Hey. - Okey. 566 00:34:57,721 --> 00:34:59,764 I hear you loud and clear, 567 00:34:59,973 --> 00:35:01,850 and I know why you wanna stay at school 568 00:35:02,058 --> 00:35:03,476 until the end of the term. 569 00:35:03,685 --> 00:35:06,229 You're rebelling with a capital R, 570 00:35:06,438 --> 00:35:10,609 and I think it's a good thing, a necessary thing for our success at Cambridge. 571 00:35:10,817 --> 00:35:14,195 So let's do it now together 572 00:35:14,404 --> 00:35:17,574 and get it out of your system before university 573 00:35:17,782 --> 00:35:20,368 in a safe and responsible way, okay? 574 00:35:20,577 --> 00:35:22,245 Do what together? 575 00:35:22,454 --> 00:35:23,913 RebeL 576 00:35:24,122 --> 00:35:25,915 Your rebellion. 577 00:35:26,124 --> 00:35:27,542 I want you to have friends, 578 00:35:27,751 --> 00:35:30,170 teach you your teenage rebellion. 579 00:35:30,378 --> 00:35:31,588 Just when I think I know you, 580 00:35:31,796 --> 00:35:33,590 you surprise the living bejesus out of me. 581 00:35:33,798 --> 00:35:35,050 Thank you. 582 00:35:35,258 --> 00:35:37,719 Why is it weird to say my mom's cool 583 00:35:37,927 --> 00:35:39,596 and she's my best friend? 584 00:35:41,431 --> 00:35:43,475 - It's not weird. - No, it is. 585 00:35:45,685 --> 00:35:47,354 At school, moms aren't cool. 586 00:35:51,399 --> 00:35:52,233 They should be. 587 00:35:54,903 --> 00:35:55,820 I love you. 588 00:35:57,364 --> 00:35:59,324 Beep boop, my little robot man. 589 00:35:59,532 --> 00:36:01,201 Oh, beep hoop. 590 00:36:01,409 --> 00:36:05,872 You power down now. You got work tomorrow. 591 00:36:06,081 --> 00:36:08,375 - Beep boop, mmm. - You're still buzzing. 592 00:36:08,583 --> 00:36:09,626 Beep hoop, oh! 593 00:36:11,044 --> 00:36:13,338 Okay, brainstorming. 594 00:36:13,546 --> 00:36:15,757 What are outlets that teens rebel with? 595 00:36:17,175 --> 00:36:19,928 - Liam. - Swimming after I eat. 596 00:36:20,136 --> 00:36:22,430 I think you could think a little bit bigger. 597 00:36:22,639 --> 00:36:24,516 - Mmm. - Liam. 598 00:36:24,724 --> 00:36:26,976 Um, not wearing pants. 599 00:36:27,185 --> 00:36:31,314 Mm, how about staying out late? 600 00:36:31,523 --> 00:36:32,607 That's good. 601 00:36:34,275 --> 00:36:35,110 With girls. 602 00:36:36,486 --> 00:36:38,154 - Ooh. - Skipping school. 603 00:36:39,614 --> 00:36:42,659 Ooh. Uh, ooh, ooh, ooh! Uh, swearing. 604 00:36:42,867 --> 00:36:44,994 Bingo, bango. Yes. 605 00:36:47,080 --> 00:36:49,541 - Getting my nose pierced. - No way. No way. 606 00:36:49,749 --> 00:36:52,502 That is permanent. Why don't we start with swearing? 607 00:36:52,711 --> 00:36:54,921 Go ahead. Say the big one. 608 00:36:55,130 --> 00:36:56,297 Dicks. 609 00:36:56,506 --> 00:36:58,967 Why would you say that? Say the big one. 610 00:36:59,175 --> 00:37:01,302 The "F" one with the... 611 00:37:01,511 --> 00:37:03,263 Fuck. 612 00:37:04,514 --> 00:37:06,099 - What? - Fuck. 613 00:37:06,307 --> 00:37:07,934 I didn't quite hear you. 614 00:37:09,936 --> 00:37:12,856 - Fuck. - So weird to hear you say that. 615 00:37:13,064 --> 00:37:14,274 - Okay, say it again. - Fuck. 616 00:37:14,482 --> 00:37:15,859 - With conviction! - Fuck! 617 00:37:16,067 --> 00:37:20,071 - Like an afro singer. - Fuck! 618 00:37:20,280 --> 00:37:22,449 Now point to that book and say, "Fuck off, book!" 619 00:37:22,657 --> 00:37:25,618 -"Fuck off, book!" - Yeah, do it again, uh... 620 00:37:25,827 --> 00:37:27,495 - Fuck you, uh, chalkboard. - Yeah! 621 00:37:27,704 --> 00:37:29,122 Fuck you, chalk. 622 00:37:29,330 --> 00:37:30,582 Fuck you, chair. Fuck you, table. 623 00:37:30,790 --> 00:37:31,958 Fuck you, highlighters. 624 00:37:32,167 --> 00:37:33,418 Fuck you, pencil, fuck you, red pens, 625 00:37:33,626 --> 00:37:35,128 fuck you, black pens, fuck you, blue pens. 626 00:37:35,336 --> 00:37:38,423 - And fuck you-- - No, don't you effing dare. 627 00:37:38,631 --> 00:37:40,800 No, "F" for fail. 628 00:37:42,469 --> 00:37:43,386 Sorry. 629 00:37:44,804 --> 00:37:45,638 I forgive you. 630 00:37:48,975 --> 00:37:52,145 Now that word is also a verb. 631 00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:55,982 Liam, I can see it written 632 00:37:56,191 --> 00:37:57,484 all over your face 633 00:37:57,692 --> 00:37:59,527 and there is no easy way to do this. 634 00:38:00,904 --> 00:38:02,113 When I say "Trojan," 635 00:38:02,322 --> 00:38:03,907 what is your first thought? 636 00:38:07,410 --> 00:38:10,538 The ancient city of Troy, Hector and Achilles, 637 00:38:10,747 --> 00:38:13,124 the Greek and Trojan soldiers famous for their bravery 638 00:38:13,333 --> 00:38:16,586 in battle and their seven-layered ox-hide shields. 639 00:38:19,672 --> 00:38:21,299 And sodomy. 640 00:38:21,508 --> 00:38:24,302 So the Trojans are still very much alive today. 641 00:38:24,511 --> 00:38:26,262 They are living in there. 642 00:38:26,471 --> 00:38:29,724 Think of that as a one-layer latex shield. 643 00:38:29,933 --> 00:38:32,435 Who would go into battle without one of those on their penis, right? 644 00:38:32,644 --> 00:38:34,604 - Right, that's a good point. - Okay, so... 645 00:38:36,356 --> 00:38:40,151 I want you to practice in here alone in the dark. 646 00:38:42,529 --> 00:38:43,613 I'll be in the kitchen if you need me. 647 00:38:50,078 --> 00:38:51,913 Oh, hello, Anastasia. 648 00:38:52,121 --> 00:38:53,915 You see, I have this condom here. 649 00:38:54,123 --> 00:38:56,835 I was wondering if you'd like to have intercourse with me. 650 00:38:57,043 --> 00:38:58,545 Oh, you would? 651 00:38:58,753 --> 00:38:59,546 Great. 652 00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:14,727 - Mom? - Yeah. 653 00:39:14,936 --> 00:39:16,104 Eight seconds. 654 00:39:18,815 --> 00:39:21,860 I don't know what happened, but eventually her... 655 00:39:22,068 --> 00:39:22,694 Hello! 656 00:39:24,362 --> 00:39:25,697 ...turned into... - Hey. 657 00:39:27,073 --> 00:39:28,408 ...which then became... 658 00:39:30,118 --> 00:39:31,536 Until finally... 659 00:39:37,500 --> 00:39:41,212 We were a 110% off each other. 660 00:39:41,421 --> 00:39:43,131 Wow. Crazy. 661 00:39:44,757 --> 00:39:48,094 Oh, frig! Oh, frig! 662 00:40:01,900 --> 00:40:02,984 You look like you need a hug. 663 00:40:05,570 --> 00:40:08,406 No, no, no, I'm not allowed to touch the students. 664 00:40:08,615 --> 00:40:09,949 But you definitely look like you need a hug. 665 00:40:15,246 --> 00:40:17,457 Come with me. Let's talk about your future. 666 00:40:19,459 --> 00:40:21,044 So what did you say this was called again? 667 00:40:21,252 --> 00:40:22,170 Astronomy. 668 00:40:22,378 --> 00:40:24,797 Astronomy. Astronomy. 669 00:40:25,006 --> 00:40:30,511 I don't see astronomy in here, but I do see massage therapy. 670 00:40:30,720 --> 00:40:32,180 Yeah, I was thinking more astronomy. 671 00:40:32,388 --> 00:40:33,848 Yeah, but you could get your certificate 672 00:40:34,057 --> 00:40:35,600 in eight months and you're done. 673 00:40:35,808 --> 00:40:37,060 Okay. 674 00:40:37,268 --> 00:40:38,895 Besides, you look like a massage therapist. 675 00:40:39,103 --> 00:40:41,356 Do you know how good that is? You get to touch people. 676 00:40:41,564 --> 00:40:43,858 I can't touch anybody here. I'm just saying, 677 00:40:44,067 --> 00:40:44,859 you gotta keep your options open, you know? 678 00:40:45,068 --> 00:40:46,402 You know, a few years ago, 679 00:40:46,611 --> 00:40:48,529 there was a kid who did a string of B-and-E's. 680 00:40:48,738 --> 00:40:50,698 He got sent to the state pen for three years. 681 00:40:50,907 --> 00:40:53,868 But he fast-tracked a sociology degree for free. 682 00:40:54,077 --> 00:40:55,244 I'm not saying that's the route you need to go, 683 00:40:55,453 --> 00:40:56,829 but something to think about. 684 00:40:57,038 --> 00:40:58,164 You know, my whole life, 685 00:40:58,373 --> 00:40:59,791 all I've wanted to do is astronomy. 686 00:40:59,999 --> 00:41:01,334 All right. Why don't we do this? 687 00:41:01,542 --> 00:41:03,836 Why don't we take our personality/job test 688 00:41:04,045 --> 00:41:06,130 on the computer, and see what that says? 689 00:41:07,757 --> 00:41:08,591 Okay. 690 00:41:10,009 --> 00:41:11,469 Hey, that... The guy 691 00:41:11,678 --> 00:41:13,179 who did the B-and-E's 692 00:41:13,388 --> 00:41:17,183 and then went to jail, uh, what did he become? 693 00:41:23,481 --> 00:41:24,774 At a party, do you interact 694 00:41:24,983 --> 00:41:27,735 with everyone, few, yourself? 695 00:41:32,323 --> 00:41:33,032 Everyone. 696 00:41:34,659 --> 00:41:36,119 Yourself, C. 697 00:41:36,327 --> 00:41:38,329 Do you walk with big steps, 698 00:41:38,538 --> 00:41:39,664 varied steps, little steps? 699 00:41:45,503 --> 00:41:46,462 Big steps! 700 00:41:48,131 --> 00:41:49,507 Little steps. 701 00:41:49,716 --> 00:41:52,802 When meeting new people, do you introduce yourself, 702 00:41:53,011 --> 00:41:54,762 wait to be introduced, be silent? 703 00:41:59,225 --> 00:42:01,853 You introduce yourself. 704 00:42:02,061 --> 00:42:03,271 Be silent. 705 00:42:11,571 --> 00:42:14,365 Ugh, why can't I be the guy who picks A? 706 00:42:15,867 --> 00:42:17,535 Oh, look at that 'stache! 707 00:42:17,744 --> 00:42:20,038 Okay, Liam, it is... It is the easiest thing in the world 708 00:42:20,246 --> 00:42:21,039 to entertain a woman. 709 00:42:21,247 --> 00:42:22,457 Honestly, you just 710 00:42:22,665 --> 00:42:24,292 ask her questions about herself. 711 00:42:24,500 --> 00:42:26,753 Get her talking. Pretend I'm Anastasia, okay? 712 00:42:26,961 --> 00:42:28,129 You're not Anastasia. 713 00:42:28,337 --> 00:42:31,007 You are Liam, I'm Anastasia! 714 00:42:31,215 --> 00:42:33,885 - Comment on my looks. - You look like my mom. 715 00:42:34,093 --> 00:42:36,596 Well, I'll take that as a compliment. 716 00:42:36,804 --> 00:42:39,891 Do you wanna talk about my... my smile? 717 00:42:40,099 --> 00:42:41,684 You have a nice smile. It makes me smile. 718 00:42:41,893 --> 00:42:44,187 Do you wanna say something about how I smell? 719 00:42:46,689 --> 00:42:47,523 You smell like my mom. 720 00:42:47,732 --> 00:42:49,692 Well, your mom smells good. 721 00:42:49,901 --> 00:42:51,652 Look, Anastasia, don't you think 722 00:42:51,861 --> 00:42:53,446 it's a little a bit weird that my mom 723 00:42:53,654 --> 00:42:54,572 is on a date with us? 724 00:42:56,699 --> 00:43:00,369 No, I think that you have a very cool mother. 725 00:43:00,578 --> 00:43:02,330 Yeah, who has a loser for a son. 726 00:43:12,131 --> 00:43:13,800 Liam! What are you doing? 727 00:43:14,008 --> 00:43:15,551 Something I should have done a long time ago. 728 00:43:40,368 --> 00:43:42,411 - Maria. - Oh, great. 729 00:43:42,620 --> 00:43:44,497 I got your personality and job match back. 730 00:43:45,665 --> 00:43:46,916 Good news! 731 00:43:47,125 --> 00:43:49,794 You know, some stories have a sad ending. 732 00:43:50,002 --> 00:43:53,714 This one, I believe, is a very happy ending. 733 00:43:53,923 --> 00:43:55,758 Massage therapist, just like I thought. 734 00:43:59,637 --> 00:44:01,556 What's wrong? Come on in. Sit down. 735 00:44:03,683 --> 00:44:05,685 - It's your father, isn't it? - No. 736 00:44:05,893 --> 00:44:08,020 - What did your father do? - Nothing. 737 00:44:08,229 --> 00:44:10,314 It's okay. Those are tough questions. 738 00:44:10,523 --> 00:44:12,441 It's a girl thing. It's a girl problem. 739 00:44:12,650 --> 00:44:14,193 I have a problem with a girl. 740 00:44:14,402 --> 00:44:15,444 Oh, it's a girl problem. 741 00:44:18,364 --> 00:44:21,159 See this cup? This cup is you. 742 00:44:21,367 --> 00:44:25,746 - Okay. - Sweet, precious, gentle. 743 00:44:25,955 --> 00:44:27,123 It's got a heart. 744 00:44:31,377 --> 00:44:33,045 Do not share your cup with someone 745 00:44:33,254 --> 00:44:34,797 unless you're ready to have it smashed. 746 00:44:37,466 --> 00:44:38,301 Now put it back together. 747 00:44:45,057 --> 00:44:45,892 I can't put it back together. 748 00:44:51,272 --> 00:44:53,107 Hey, kid! You want some candy? 749 00:44:53,316 --> 00:44:55,151 - Mom? Hey! - Come on. 750 00:44:55,359 --> 00:44:57,612 I got some good shit in here. 751 00:44:57,820 --> 00:44:59,697 - What are you talking about? - Come on, kid, get in the car. 752 00:44:59,906 --> 00:45:01,115 You're being weird. 753 00:45:01,324 --> 00:45:02,533 What are you? A pussy? 754 00:45:02,742 --> 00:45:03,451 Pussy, pussy, pussy, PUSSY, 755 00:45:03,659 --> 00:45:05,036 pussy, pussy, pussy, pussy! 756 00:45:05,244 --> 00:45:06,787 All right. 757 00:45:08,706 --> 00:45:11,667 I can't believe you got in the car so quickly! 758 00:45:11,876 --> 00:45:14,378 - What if I was a pervert? - What? You're my mom. 759 00:45:14,587 --> 00:45:16,505 - What is that? - Weed. 760 00:45:16,714 --> 00:45:18,424 Okay, now you're bound 761 00:45:18,633 --> 00:45:19,967 to get pressured into it at some point, 762 00:45:20,176 --> 00:45:21,677 so let's just try it now 763 00:45:21,886 --> 00:45:22,970 in a safe environment. 764 00:45:23,179 --> 00:45:24,430 Well, where did you-- where did you-- 765 00:45:24,639 --> 00:45:25,932 Where did you get this? 766 00:45:27,850 --> 00:45:30,228 Where-- ls this a... 767 00:45:30,436 --> 00:45:31,687 This is a test. 768 00:45:31,896 --> 00:45:33,022 This is a test. 769 00:45:33,231 --> 00:45:35,524 - No. Say "no" to drugs. - No, no. 770 00:45:35,733 --> 00:45:36,943 No, honey, it's not a test. 771 00:45:37,151 --> 00:45:39,779 This is a-- This is a supervised first try. 772 00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:42,698 It's called a "hotbox." 773 00:45:42,907 --> 00:45:44,951 You get, like, a little bit of a better high, 774 00:45:45,159 --> 00:45:46,702 because it's like you're in a box. 775 00:45:46,911 --> 00:45:48,120 You serious? Yeah, I know. 776 00:45:48,329 --> 00:45:49,789 No, I know the physics of it. 777 00:45:49,997 --> 00:45:51,290 I just don't know the ethics. 778 00:45:52,750 --> 00:45:53,417 Are you... 779 00:45:56,420 --> 00:45:57,380 You shouldn't sm-- 780 00:46:00,758 --> 00:46:01,425 Ooh! 781 00:46:03,427 --> 00:46:04,095 It's burny. 782 00:46:05,972 --> 00:46:07,640 It's Bernie Sanders. 783 00:46:07,848 --> 00:46:09,767 Are we gonna get-- Um, are we gonna get 784 00:46:09,976 --> 00:46:11,602 caught or busted or... 785 00:46:11,811 --> 00:46:13,396 No, you're with me and Grandma. 786 00:46:13,604 --> 00:46:14,981 Here, take a hit. 787 00:46:15,189 --> 00:46:17,733 Is it indica or sativa or ruderalis? 788 00:46:17,942 --> 00:46:19,610 I don't know. 789 00:46:19,819 --> 00:46:21,279 Well, they have different THC levels. 790 00:46:21,487 --> 00:46:23,030 Well, go ahead and hurry up and hit it. 791 00:46:23,239 --> 00:46:24,407 I don't wanna get caught. 792 00:46:31,539 --> 00:46:32,331 What do you mean, get caught? 793 00:46:32,540 --> 00:46:33,624 I thought this was... 794 00:46:33,833 --> 00:46:34,709 I thought it was prescription. 795 00:46:34,917 --> 00:46:36,168 - Grandma? - Mm-hmm. 796 00:46:36,377 --> 00:46:38,963 - Well, it's legal for her. - But not for us? 797 00:46:39,171 --> 00:46:41,549 Technically... Technically, no. 798 00:46:44,385 --> 00:46:46,971 -- Oh, my God! He scared me. 799 00:46:47,179 --> 00:46:48,681 Hide that. Hide the joint! Hide the joint! 800 00:46:53,311 --> 00:46:54,895 - Hey, hi. - Hello. 801 00:46:55,104 --> 00:46:57,023 - Hello. - Principal Kelly! 802 00:46:57,231 --> 00:47:00,318 Wow! It definitely smells like marijuana in here. 803 00:47:00,526 --> 00:47:03,904 Yeah, Grandma's arthritis is a real knock-out. 804 00:47:04,113 --> 00:47:05,823 - Oh! Hi, Grandma! -lt's Grandma. 805 00:47:06,032 --> 00:47:07,825 Yeah. Look, I'm no disciplinarian, okay? 806 00:47:08,034 --> 00:47:09,160 - Thank God! - I just play one for work. 807 00:47:09,368 --> 00:47:11,245 - So, I'm fun a guy. - Yeah. 808 00:47:11,454 --> 00:47:14,874 Um, listen, I wanna just... We got disconnected before 809 00:47:15,082 --> 00:47:17,793 and I would just love 810 00:47:18,002 --> 00:47:21,839 to cook you kebabs at my place. 811 00:47:22,048 --> 00:47:24,008 It's a great view, if you're into that. 812 00:47:24,216 --> 00:47:26,886 Um, maybe some wine, if you like. 813 00:47:27,094 --> 00:47:29,472 Maybe a mutually- agreed-upon kiss, 814 00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:31,349 if you are into that. 815 00:47:31,557 --> 00:47:35,561 Okay. No. Um, look, I-- I should be clear. 816 00:47:35,770 --> 00:47:39,065 I have very strict rules about not hooking up 817 00:47:39,273 --> 00:47:40,900 with teachers at my school. Right. 818 00:47:41,108 --> 00:47:44,153 - But anyone outside ofschoolofageis". - Mm-hmm. 819 00:47:44,362 --> 00:47:46,197 ...fair game, and you're your own school, 820 00:47:46,405 --> 00:47:47,740 so you're fair game. 821 00:47:47,948 --> 00:47:52,161 I sort of have a rule about dating my son's... 822 00:47:52,370 --> 00:47:55,122 My son's... My son's principals. 823 00:47:56,582 --> 00:47:58,042 - So... - Yeah. 824 00:47:59,710 --> 00:48:01,379 You guys drive safe. Okay. 825 00:48:01,587 --> 00:48:02,254 Bye! 826 00:48:05,257 --> 00:48:07,218 - Holy buckets. - Holy buckets is right. 827 00:48:07,426 --> 00:48:09,053 That was totally cookadoo. 828 00:48:10,721 --> 00:48:12,223 But I think he didn't know we were high. 829 00:48:18,229 --> 00:48:19,563 - Oh, my God! - What? 830 00:48:19,772 --> 00:48:21,440 That's her. That's Anastasia. 831 00:48:21,649 --> 00:48:23,401 - The girl with the limp? - Yeah. 832 00:48:23,609 --> 00:48:25,945 - What the heck? - She's our neighbor? 833 00:48:26,153 --> 00:48:28,489 How have I never seen her here before? 834 00:48:28,697 --> 00:48:31,200 You are so much more handsome than that guy. 835 00:48:31,409 --> 00:48:32,493 She's gonna flip out when she finds out 836 00:48:32,701 --> 00:48:33,869 you're on the badminton team. 837 00:48:34,078 --> 00:48:36,705 - No. - Do you wanna smoke any more? 838 00:48:36,914 --> 00:48:38,124 - No. - No, thank you. 839 00:48:38,332 --> 00:48:39,792 I'm pretty high now. 840 00:48:40,000 --> 00:48:41,794 Oh, crap. It says, 841 00:48:42,002 --> 00:48:44,797 "Do not drive or operate any heavy machinery." Oops! 842 00:49:22,001 --> 00:49:23,836 All right, mate? 843 00:49:24,044 --> 00:49:25,337 Good night, penis breath. 844 00:49:26,630 --> 00:49:27,798 Oh, I'm such a loser. 845 00:49:32,386 --> 00:49:34,430 Maria, you got no shot. 846 00:49:34,638 --> 00:49:36,390 Okay. Girls, they just... 847 00:49:36,599 --> 00:49:38,017 They just date dicks. 848 00:49:38,225 --> 00:49:39,393 Love guys who treat 'em like dicks, 849 00:49:39,602 --> 00:49:41,353 and girls just love dicks. 850 00:49:41,562 --> 00:49:43,439 Then I'm gonna be Anastasia's dick. 851 00:49:45,191 --> 00:49:47,485 Well, then you gotta make a bold dick move, man. 852 00:49:47,693 --> 00:49:49,570 - You know, show her you can compete. - Yeah. 853 00:49:49,778 --> 00:49:51,655 - Girls love that shit. - Yeah. 854 00:49:54,283 --> 00:49:54,992 Yeah. Wait... 855 00:49:58,996 --> 00:50:01,457 Uh, you mean like kiss her? 856 00:50:01,665 --> 00:50:03,751 - Well, did she try to kiss you? - No. 857 00:50:03,959 --> 00:50:06,086 - Mmm. Did you see her bobos? - No. 858 00:50:06,295 --> 00:50:08,506 - Have you ever seen bobos, Liam? - Yes. 859 00:50:08,714 --> 00:50:10,508 - You're full of shit. - No, I have! 860 00:50:15,596 --> 00:50:17,223 - Hey. - Hey- 861 00:50:17,431 --> 00:50:18,516 - I'm gonna go to bed. - Okay. 862 00:50:18,724 --> 00:50:20,017 - Good night. - Good night. 863 00:50:20,226 --> 00:50:22,102 That's absolutely disgusting, 864 00:50:22,311 --> 00:50:23,354 but hot at the same time. 865 00:50:23,562 --> 00:50:26,232 You know, your mom is really hot. 866 00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:27,608 Like she could be your sister. 867 00:50:28,817 --> 00:50:29,527 God, I'd play 868 00:50:29,735 --> 00:50:30,778 all 18 holes of that. 869 00:50:30,986 --> 00:50:32,738 Yeah. Yeah. 870 00:50:34,698 --> 00:50:35,658 Hey, what's their problem? 871 00:50:42,414 --> 00:50:44,416 - Holy fuck! - What? What? 872 00:50:44,625 --> 00:50:48,629 Uh, Maria Sanchez is dead. 873 00:51:02,560 --> 00:51:03,727 The day Maria died... 874 00:51:06,063 --> 00:51:08,065 was the best day of my life. 875 00:51:14,905 --> 00:51:16,907 Suddenly everyone treated me like I had died, 876 00:51:18,867 --> 00:51:20,202 but I never felt more alive. 877 00:51:24,790 --> 00:51:25,457 Hey. 878 00:51:28,794 --> 00:51:30,462 I'm a total dick. 879 00:51:30,671 --> 00:51:33,757 Do you know I never said a single word to Maria, 880 00:51:33,966 --> 00:51:35,593 but now I kinda feel like because of you 881 00:51:35,801 --> 00:51:37,052 I get the chance to change that. 882 00:51:37,261 --> 00:51:39,597 God! I love you, Maria Sanchez. 883 00:51:43,475 --> 00:51:44,768 I'm s-- sorry, Maria. 884 00:51:48,230 --> 00:51:51,108 Most people didn't give a shit about Maria. 885 00:51:51,317 --> 00:51:53,527 I mean, Aisley sure as hell wasn't her friend. 886 00:51:53,736 --> 00:51:56,655 I guess it's like nobody really cares until-- 887 00:51:56,864 --> 00:51:57,906 You lose a leg. 888 00:51:59,617 --> 00:52:00,492 Yeah. 889 00:52:06,248 --> 00:52:08,500 Um, I'm gonna be right back, okay? 890 00:52:08,709 --> 00:52:09,960 - Okay. - Yeah. 891 00:52:15,341 --> 00:52:16,634 Oh, God, ew! 892 00:52:16,842 --> 00:52:20,137 Bold dick move. You gotta do it. 893 00:52:36,403 --> 00:52:37,446 You didn't cut him up? 894 00:52:37,655 --> 00:52:39,323 Uh, no, I didn't have the heart. 895 00:52:48,874 --> 00:52:51,669 Hey, you live in Greenwood Street, right? 896 00:52:51,877 --> 00:52:52,836 Yeah. 897 00:52:53,045 --> 00:52:55,631 One sec. Sorry. 898 00:53:00,511 --> 00:53:02,054 Fire alarm. 899 00:53:02,262 --> 00:53:03,806 My mom and I practiced this at home. Follow me. 900 00:53:05,724 --> 00:53:08,394 Fire, fire, fire, fire, fire, fire! 901 00:53:49,017 --> 00:53:50,227 - Rum. - Rum. 902 00:53:51,687 --> 00:53:52,396 Rum Tum Tugger. 903 00:53:59,445 --> 00:54:01,321 I know. It's rummy. 904 00:54:03,907 --> 00:54:04,700 Mmm. 905 00:54:06,118 --> 00:54:07,995 - Mmm. - What? ls it skunked? 906 00:54:09,538 --> 00:54:10,414 I think it's gone bad. 907 00:54:14,376 --> 00:54:15,210 I don't think it's bad. 908 00:54:17,921 --> 00:54:18,756 Mmm. 909 00:54:20,841 --> 00:54:23,093 Gross, but the least worst. 910 00:54:23,302 --> 00:54:24,261 Oh, God, honey, I love you, 911 00:54:24,470 --> 00:54:26,096 but that is a pussy drink. 912 00:54:26,305 --> 00:54:29,224 - Oh, that's perfect! - No. No. 913 00:54:29,433 --> 00:54:32,478 Like bad pussy, like you are the pussy. 914 00:54:32,686 --> 00:54:36,190 So wait, I get... We wanna get the pussy, not drink the pussy. 915 00:54:36,398 --> 00:54:37,775 I mean, yes, 916 00:54:37,983 --> 00:54:40,235 but what I meant by pussy in this situation is, 917 00:54:40,444 --> 00:54:42,237 is that it's wimpy. Wimpy. 918 00:54:42,446 --> 00:54:46,575 So drinking a wimpy drink makes you wimpy and then wimpy... 919 00:54:46,784 --> 00:54:51,538 Wimpy guys don't get the literal pussy. 920 00:54:51,747 --> 00:54:53,582 If we're gonna talk anatomy, 921 00:54:53,791 --> 00:54:55,751 -can we talk about balls? - Sure. 922 00:54:55,959 --> 00:54:58,086 - Balls of steel? - Mmm-hmm. 923 00:54:58,295 --> 00:55:00,005 I mean, who came up with that? 924 00:55:00,214 --> 00:55:03,425 My balls are like tiny little grapes, sensitive, weird. 925 00:55:03,634 --> 00:55:06,386 It's like a metaphor or-- 926 00:55:06,595 --> 00:55:08,555 Are there men with actual balls of steel? 927 00:55:50,138 --> 00:55:50,848 Not afraid. 928 00:56:02,109 --> 00:56:04,194 All right. Have your key and everything? 929 00:56:04,403 --> 00:56:06,905 Yep, got it all. All ready to go. Here we go. 930 00:56:07,114 --> 00:56:09,491 Okay. Here we go. 931 00:56:09,700 --> 00:56:11,159 - Ooh! - Oh, man! What was that? 932 00:56:11,368 --> 00:56:13,871 - That's probably a flat tire. - What? 933 00:56:14,079 --> 00:56:16,290 Yeah. I'll probably just have to carpool with Anastasia today. 934 00:56:16,498 --> 00:56:19,042 I was... Wait, well, wait. I'll just... Honey, I'll just change the tire! 935 00:56:19,251 --> 00:56:21,503 Are you sure it's safe to ride with a peg-legged driver, Li-- 936 00:56:21,712 --> 00:56:22,629 Yeah. No, it's gonna be fine. 937 00:56:27,467 --> 00:56:28,927 Whoa! 938 00:56:29,136 --> 00:56:31,221 Huh, almost lost my legs. 939 00:56:31,430 --> 00:56:33,307 I didn't see you there, Maria. 940 00:56:33,515 --> 00:56:35,058 I got a flat tire. 941 00:56:35,267 --> 00:56:37,144 I've got five bucks for some gas money. Carpool? 942 00:56:38,562 --> 00:56:39,605 - Yeah, okay. - Cool. 943 00:56:41,106 --> 00:56:42,441 I love you. 944 00:56:45,235 --> 00:56:47,237 I should let you know that in a few months, 945 00:56:47,446 --> 00:56:48,572 I'll be leaving for England. 946 00:56:48,780 --> 00:56:51,575 I'm gonna study astronomy at Cambridge. 947 00:56:51,783 --> 00:56:55,120 So you should probably know our time is short. 948 00:56:56,538 --> 00:56:58,916 - Stephen Hawking. - Okay, thanks. 949 00:56:59,124 --> 00:57:01,418 Yeah. I'm a horoscope junkie, too. 950 00:57:01,627 --> 00:57:04,004 I read it and then I will it true. 951 00:57:04,212 --> 00:57:07,883 Don't tell me, you are a... 952 00:57:10,594 --> 00:57:13,972 I wanna say Libra, but something in your eyes tells me... 953 00:57:15,849 --> 00:57:17,768 - Virgo. - Pisces. 954 00:57:17,976 --> 00:57:20,270 Mmm. That's too bad, I'm a Leo. 955 00:57:20,479 --> 00:57:22,940 - Not compatible. - Nuts. 956 00:57:23,148 --> 00:57:25,108 Those 14 minutes in Anastasia's truck 957 00:57:25,317 --> 00:57:27,402 to and fro school was my life. 958 00:57:27,611 --> 00:57:29,321 Everything else faded away. 959 00:57:29,529 --> 00:57:32,324 Hey, you know, every song, every good song, 960 00:57:32,532 --> 00:57:35,035 all you pretty much need are the words 961 00:57:35,243 --> 00:57:40,374 "woman," "love," "heartbreak," "beautiful." 962 00:57:41,959 --> 00:57:43,961 You know what? You're totally right. 963 00:57:44,169 --> 00:57:45,420 And the word "sex" a few times. 964 00:57:54,179 --> 00:57:57,057 Some guys had dinner dates, movie dates. 965 00:57:57,265 --> 00:57:58,100 I had the carpool date. 966 00:57:58,308 --> 00:57:59,101 That's cool. My treat. 967 00:58:00,477 --> 00:58:01,144 Thanks. 968 00:58:02,729 --> 00:58:04,022 Did I just see a picture of a girl in there? 969 00:58:04,231 --> 00:58:05,190 Oh, no, that's nobody. 970 00:58:07,359 --> 00:58:09,486 Liam? ls that your girlfriend? 971 00:58:11,571 --> 00:58:13,949 Yeah. Yeah, it is. It is. It's my girlfriend. 972 00:58:14,157 --> 00:58:15,951 Oh! Score, Liam. 973 00:58:16,159 --> 00:58:17,160 - Yeah. -ls she hot? 974 00:58:17,369 --> 00:58:18,453 - Oh, man! - Let me see. 975 00:58:18,662 --> 00:58:19,538 - No, she's just-- - Let me see. 976 00:58:19,746 --> 00:58:20,622 Let me see. Let me see. 977 00:58:24,793 --> 00:58:27,045 - Isn't that your mom? - Yes, it is. 978 00:58:27,254 --> 00:58:30,173 So, Mr. Astronomy, tell me my future. 979 00:58:30,382 --> 00:58:33,552 You're a Leo. I see a lot of sunshine in your future. 980 00:58:34,553 --> 00:58:36,555 And? 981 00:58:36,763 --> 00:58:38,598 I mean, you want me to tell you that everything's gonna be fine 982 00:58:38,807 --> 00:58:40,017 and that anything's possible. 983 00:58:40,225 --> 00:58:42,060 But that's not really true, is it? 984 00:58:42,269 --> 00:58:44,646 I mean, women have less opportunities than men. They get paid less. 985 00:58:44,855 --> 00:58:46,523 White men have way more opportunities. 986 00:58:48,400 --> 00:58:50,694 Mom! Mom, grab my hand! 987 00:58:50,902 --> 00:58:53,905 Mom? What are you doing outside the window? 988 00:58:54,114 --> 00:58:57,200 Mom, you're slippi_ng! I can feel you slipplng! 989 00:58:57,409 --> 00:58:58,744 Mom! Oh! 990 00:59:01,121 --> 00:59:02,998 Like, I mean, you've lost something that everybody else has, your leg. 991 00:59:04,833 --> 00:59:07,544 - Yeah, I know. - So you know no fear. 992 00:59:08,920 --> 00:59:10,338 You know anything is possible 993 00:59:10,547 --> 00:59:12,758 and I think for you, anything is possible. 994 00:59:12,966 --> 00:59:13,925 I think you're gonna be an astronaut. 995 00:59:15,469 --> 00:59:17,387 An astronaut? 996 00:59:17,596 --> 00:59:20,599 Wow! That's a lot more than my daily horoscope said, 997 00:59:20,807 --> 00:59:22,559 all it said was I was gonna get lucky. 998 00:59:47,459 --> 00:59:49,169 Do you wanna touch it? 999 00:59:51,630 --> 00:59:54,216 - Oh, my God, yes. - Okay, then touch it. 1000 00:59:56,968 --> 01:00:00,680 The cancer started out here and it was extremely rare, 1001 01:00:00,889 --> 01:00:03,433 like three-people rare. 1002 01:00:03,642 --> 01:00:04,976 And then all of a sudden, it was here. 1003 01:00:06,728 --> 01:00:08,730 I hate cancer. 1004 01:00:08,939 --> 01:00:12,109 And they finally decided to cut it off here. 1005 01:00:14,402 --> 01:00:17,739 - Thatsucks. - And it's all gone, for now. 1006 01:00:19,908 --> 01:00:21,201 And I think that sometimes-- 1007 01:00:23,203 --> 01:00:26,289 Yeah, I think sometimes things happen for a reason 1008 01:00:26,498 --> 01:00:29,751 and sometimes I think things happen that just suck. 1009 01:00:31,545 --> 01:00:34,506 And the voice in my head is like, 1010 01:00:34,714 --> 01:00:36,049 "Well, what are you gonna do now?" 1011 01:00:37,884 --> 01:00:40,178 I don't know why my inner voice is so manly. 1012 01:00:40,387 --> 01:00:42,764 But I can still do everything, you know? 1013 01:00:42,973 --> 01:00:44,933 You know, run, swim, 1014 01:00:46,768 --> 01:00:47,435 sex. 1015 01:00:50,939 --> 01:00:54,234 Earthquake, Maria! 1016 01:00:56,153 --> 01:00:58,780 BDC needs a ride today. 1017 01:00:58,989 --> 01:01:00,490 - Hey, hottie. - Hi, cutie. 1018 01:01:00,699 --> 01:01:02,242 How much? 1019 01:01:02,450 --> 01:01:04,202 I'll do anything for a ten, more for a 20 though. 1020 01:01:05,912 --> 01:01:07,038 - Uh? - Let's go. 1021 01:01:07,247 --> 01:01:08,331 - Hop in, Maria. - Okay. 1022 01:01:10,417 --> 01:01:11,376 Freezing my tits off. 1023 01:01:25,432 --> 01:01:28,101 BDC, stop calling him! 1024 01:01:33,398 --> 01:01:35,692 Paging Maria Sanchez to the office, please. 1025 01:01:42,490 --> 01:01:44,159 - May I help you? - Yeah, I'm Maria Sanchez. 1026 01:01:45,535 --> 01:01:47,913 No. I'm Maria Sanchez. 1027 01:01:48,121 --> 01:01:50,582 And just like that, Maria was back from the dead. 1028 01:01:52,876 --> 01:01:56,338 - Hablas espafiol? - I mean, I can count to ten. 1029 01:01:56,546 --> 01:01:59,424 - Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco-- - Yeah, I get it. 1030 01:01:59,633 --> 01:02:00,342 I can read Braille. 1031 01:02:01,968 --> 01:02:02,636 But you can see. 1032 01:02:04,721 --> 01:02:05,472 Yeah, I can see. 1033 01:02:08,099 --> 01:02:08,767 Huh. 1034 01:02:10,101 --> 01:02:11,561 Sorry about the confusion. 1035 01:02:11,770 --> 01:02:14,397 I guess it must have been a bad rumor, you know? 1036 01:02:16,399 --> 01:02:18,526 It turns out she was never even sick. 1037 01:02:18,735 --> 01:02:22,614 She was on an exchange with another student from Brazil. 1038 01:02:22,822 --> 01:02:26,826 I mean, it was all filed, but this place is just... Ugh! 1039 01:02:29,454 --> 01:02:32,916 It's probably on the old comp. lfiljustn. 1040 01:02:36,878 --> 01:02:38,296 Mmm, nope. 1041 01:02:38,505 --> 01:02:39,881 Yeah, so what does that mean for me? 1042 01:02:40,090 --> 01:02:43,176 Not good for you, but for me, good. 1043 01:02:43,385 --> 01:02:45,553 You know, now that you're no longer an official student here, 1044 01:02:45,762 --> 01:02:48,932 I can go on the record that I am actively pursuing your mother. 1045 01:02:49,140 --> 01:02:52,811 And I think my chances are pretty, pretty good. 1046 01:02:55,855 --> 01:02:56,523 Yeah. 1047 01:02:58,108 --> 01:02:58,775 Yeah. 1048 01:03:01,903 --> 01:03:02,821 Okay, that's... 1049 01:03:09,661 --> 01:03:11,538 The five-second rule is a myth. 1050 01:03:11,746 --> 01:03:14,374 Five, ten, 100, it doesn't matter, it's all the same germs. 1051 01:03:16,126 --> 01:03:17,794 Some pretty well-executed data entry. 1052 01:03:18,003 --> 01:03:19,629 Yeah, I know. We got an A. 1053 01:03:19,838 --> 01:03:22,465 Yeah, you got A's in all my classes exceptdance. 1054 01:03:22,674 --> 01:03:25,260 Really? Someone said I was lit. 1055 01:03:25,468 --> 01:03:27,345 I'm pretty good at square dancing. So I'm a bit cheesed. 1056 01:03:29,848 --> 01:03:31,558 Sorry I'm still alive. 1057 01:03:31,766 --> 01:03:33,768 Me, too. But I understand. 1058 01:03:35,729 --> 01:03:37,605 Thanks. 1059 01:03:47,866 --> 01:03:50,285 "Anastasia's car, dirty." 1060 01:03:59,878 --> 01:04:02,589 Honey, I know you're upset, but I did tell you that public school 1061 01:04:02,797 --> 01:04:05,258 is just an institution for low expectations. 1062 01:04:05,467 --> 01:04:08,511 So I want you to forget about school, forget about the girl. 1063 01:04:08,720 --> 01:04:11,222 It's time to party. So get dressed. 1064 01:04:11,431 --> 01:04:13,600 We're gonna call tonight your rebound night. 1065 01:04:13,808 --> 01:04:15,352 Here. 1066 01:04:15,560 --> 01:04:16,353 Everyone's wearing them. 1067 01:04:23,526 --> 01:04:25,403 - Cool. - What did you just say? 1068 01:04:25,612 --> 01:04:27,489 Cool. 1069 01:04:27,697 --> 01:04:30,617 I feel like I don't even know who you are anymore. 1070 01:04:30,825 --> 01:04:34,245 This is so stupid. I don't know where to find a party. 1071 01:04:34,454 --> 01:04:37,665 Well, come on, let's go closer to the college. There'll be some there. 1072 01:04:37,874 --> 01:04:39,042 I'll keep looking. 1073 01:04:39,250 --> 01:04:41,628 I'm sorry. I'm nervous. 1074 01:04:41,836 --> 01:04:43,088 Kind of excited to let loose a little. 1075 01:04:44,923 --> 01:04:46,299 Whoo! 1076 01:04:46,508 --> 01:04:47,300 Ah, that was fun. 1077 01:04:48,718 --> 01:04:50,220 Come on, Autumn. Try it. 1078 01:04:51,805 --> 01:04:52,639 Whoo! 1079 01:04:56,643 --> 01:04:58,520 Here, sweetie. Pussy drink. Take three. 1080 01:04:58,728 --> 01:05:00,438 Three for you is a rager, 1081 01:05:00,647 --> 01:05:02,148 'cause you're a lightweight. Be safe. All right? 1082 01:05:02,357 --> 01:05:04,025 Mmm. 1083 01:05:04,234 --> 01:05:07,695 Oh, it hurts. Mmm. And it tastes like peaches, sparkly. 1084 01:05:07,904 --> 01:05:11,533 So the rule is we will stay one room away from you guys at all times 1085 01:05:11,741 --> 01:05:14,119 and if anyone asks who invited you, just say Mike, 1086 01:05:14,327 --> 01:05:15,578 because everyone has a friend named Mike. 1087 01:05:15,787 --> 01:05:17,497 - I don't. - Aw. 1088 01:05:17,705 --> 01:05:20,083 You do tonight, tiger. All right. Let's split up. 1089 01:05:21,793 --> 01:05:22,627 Go party. 1090 01:05:25,588 --> 01:05:29,592 Hey, um, will you keep an eye on Liam for me, please? 1091 01:05:29,801 --> 01:05:32,137 - Of course. And same with Autumn? - Yeah, yeah. 1092 01:05:32,345 --> 01:05:33,972 - Okay. - Definitely. 1093 01:05:34,180 --> 01:05:36,433 Hey, why are you drinking so much? 1094 01:05:36,641 --> 01:05:40,061 Uh, I just... I get really nervous at these social events 1095 01:05:40,270 --> 01:05:43,231 and I don't wanna end up in a corner by myself like usual. 1096 01:05:43,440 --> 01:05:45,191 Those days are gonzo. 1097 01:05:45,400 --> 01:05:48,319 Totally. Okay. Come on. 1098 01:06:42,916 --> 01:06:46,794 We have peppers, we have cheese! It's nacho time! 1099 01:06:55,053 --> 01:06:56,054 How did I not think I would-- 1100 01:06:56,262 --> 01:06:57,138 Mackenzie? 1101 01:06:58,640 --> 01:07:01,893 I am in desperate need of a beverage 1102 01:07:02,101 --> 01:07:03,686 and since you, Mr. Liam, 1103 01:07:03,895 --> 01:07:06,105 are on dry land, you need to get me one. 1104 01:07:06,314 --> 01:07:09,234 Oh, here. Do you want some of this? It's like warm soup. 1105 01:07:09,442 --> 01:07:12,028 Yes. Thank you, Claire! 1106 01:07:13,613 --> 01:07:15,949 Are you scared of the water, land lover? 1107 01:07:16,157 --> 01:07:18,117 Oh, I didn't bring my trunks or anything. 1108 01:07:18,326 --> 01:07:20,995 Oh. Well, neither did we. 1109 01:07:36,094 --> 01:07:39,180 - You're taking a long time to get in the water. -l'm coming as fast as I can. 1110 01:07:41,474 --> 01:07:42,141 Whoa! 1111 01:07:43,768 --> 01:07:45,478 - Whoo! - Ooh! 1112 01:07:45,687 --> 01:07:47,438 Now it's a party! 1113 01:07:47,647 --> 01:07:49,899 Um, did you see Autumn inside? 1114 01:07:50,108 --> 01:07:52,986 Yeah, uh, she was cleaning the sliding doors. 1115 01:07:53,194 --> 01:07:54,737 - Oh, really? - Yeah. 1116 01:07:54,946 --> 01:07:56,281 - Liam! - Mom! 1117 01:07:56,489 --> 01:07:58,950 Honey! Where's your shirt? 1118 01:07:59,158 --> 01:08:00,493 - Oh... - You're gonna catch a cold. 1119 01:08:00,702 --> 01:08:02,078 I'm gonna make you some hot tea, okay? 1120 01:08:02,287 --> 01:08:04,497 No, Mom. I'm okay, really. 1121 01:08:04,706 --> 01:08:07,500 How can you be having fun if you're cold and soaking wet? 1122 01:08:07,709 --> 01:08:10,169 Mom, I was thinking about maybe staying for the party. 1123 01:08:10,378 --> 01:08:11,921 Okay, we can stay for a bit. 1124 01:08:12,130 --> 01:08:14,007 No, I was thinking that maybe you should go. 1125 01:08:15,174 --> 01:08:16,884 I get it. 1126 01:08:17,093 --> 01:08:19,429 You wanna make out with a girl, honey, you go for it. 1127 01:08:19,637 --> 01:08:21,806 So many pretty ones here. Okay, honey, bye! 1128 01:08:22,015 --> 01:08:24,642 - Bye. I love you. - I love you. 1129 01:08:27,061 --> 01:08:28,730 Autumn, what happened to your face? 1130 01:08:28,938 --> 01:08:32,442 There is red food coloring in lip balm. I ate it all. 1131 01:08:41,618 --> 01:08:42,535 Hold on, okay? 1132 01:08:47,290 --> 01:08:48,416 911, what's your emergency? 1133 01:08:48,625 --> 01:08:50,126 Hi, I have a noise complaint. 1134 01:09:08,770 --> 01:09:12,106 Hey, Maria. Thanks for the invite. 1135 01:09:20,406 --> 01:09:21,616 What happened? 1136 01:09:21,824 --> 01:09:23,910 - You got punched in the face. - Oh... 1137 01:09:24,118 --> 01:09:26,412 I'm such a bad person. 1138 01:09:26,621 --> 01:09:31,584 I'm a terrible mom. Autumn is so crazy. She has no friends. 1139 01:09:32,835 --> 01:09:34,921 Look, I finished my knitting cap. 1140 01:09:35,129 --> 01:09:36,839 Oh. 1141 01:09:37,048 --> 01:09:41,928 Oh, what am I doing? Come on. Let's go. 1142 01:09:48,476 --> 01:09:50,436 Oh. That's my mom. 1143 01:09:50,645 --> 01:09:52,313 - Oh, god. 1144 01:09:52,522 --> 01:09:53,981 Mom'? 1145 01:09:54,190 --> 01:09:56,567 Liam! Liam Heap! 1146 01:09:58,027 --> 01:09:58,695 Liam! 1147 01:10:00,530 --> 01:10:03,908 You get in the frigging car right now! In the car! 1148 01:10:06,035 --> 01:10:07,954 Okay. Sorry. Sorry, Mom. 1149 01:10:08,162 --> 01:10:09,122 Get in the car! 1150 01:10:11,499 --> 01:10:13,084 You get in the car! 1151 01:10:13,292 --> 01:10:15,169 Autumn, get in the back seat! 1152 01:10:15,378 --> 01:10:16,462 You get in the back seat! 1153 01:10:16,671 --> 01:10:17,672 In the front seat, Mackenzie! 1154 01:10:17,880 --> 01:10:19,215 Autumn, get in the backseat! 1155 01:10:20,925 --> 01:10:21,884 Get in the car! 1156 01:10:30,810 --> 01:10:33,187 Slut. 1157 01:10:33,396 --> 01:10:36,691 I'm so sorry that I decided that I wanted to take you to your first college party 1158 01:10:36,899 --> 01:10:38,443 and teach you how to get drunk for the first time. 1159 01:10:38,651 --> 01:10:39,944 Everything's a frigging lesson with you! 1160 01:10:40,153 --> 01:10:42,113 "Oh, Liam, this is how you write a test, Liam." 1161 01:10:42,321 --> 01:10:43,823 I don't. You make me sound like a moron! 1162 01:10:44,031 --> 01:10:45,616 "Yeah, Liam, this is how you party. 1163 01:10:45,825 --> 01:10:47,535 "Liam, this is how you drink, this is how you have fun!" 1164 01:10:47,744 --> 01:10:49,203 You made out with Mackenzie! 1165 01:10:49,412 --> 01:10:51,289 So what? 1166 01:10:51,497 --> 01:10:52,832 She was really nice. What? Would you rather I made out with you? 1167 01:10:53,040 --> 01:10:54,375 - Ugh. - Hmm? Mom, what? 1168 01:10:54,584 --> 01:10:56,502 - Whoa! - Come on. Show me the ropes, Mom. 1169 01:10:56,711 --> 01:10:58,254 You know what? I'm sorry I just tried to make the best for you. 1170 01:10:58,463 --> 01:11:01,132 You're not! You want me to be better, but I can't. 1171 01:11:01,340 --> 01:11:03,384 I'm a loser. I don't even wanna go to Cambridge. 1172 01:11:03,593 --> 01:11:05,678 Oh, you poor, privileged white male! 1173 01:11:05,887 --> 01:11:08,431 No, I wanna go become a massage therapist! 1174 01:11:08,639 --> 01:11:09,557 Don't you dare! 1175 01:11:13,269 --> 01:11:15,104 Liam? Liam! 1176 01:11:22,153 --> 01:11:24,197 What the hell? Oh, my god! What are you doing? 1177 01:11:24,405 --> 01:11:26,282 - Another lesson, obviously! - This is my door! 1178 01:11:26,491 --> 01:11:28,743 You're out of control! 1179 01:11:28,951 --> 01:11:31,496 - Get that stupid shirt-- - Get out! Get out of here! 1180 01:11:33,456 --> 01:11:37,710 Sometimes moms... Ow! You little shit! Liam! Ow! 1181 01:11:39,295 --> 01:11:42,173 You are very, very... Get over here. 1182 01:11:43,508 --> 01:11:44,175 Ah! 1183 01:11:47,011 --> 01:11:48,179 Did you just spank me? 1184 01:11:49,889 --> 01:11:51,641 Yes. 1185 01:11:53,142 --> 01:11:54,185 You had it coming. 1186 01:12:03,528 --> 01:12:05,154 You know who won the Pulitzer Prize this year? 1187 01:12:08,741 --> 01:12:11,327 - Why? - You don't. Do you? 1188 01:12:11,536 --> 01:12:13,788 Who won the hurdles in the Olympics? 1189 01:12:15,581 --> 01:12:16,791 - Men's or females'? - You don't know? 1190 01:12:19,377 --> 01:12:22,046 Best in the whole world 1191 01:12:22,255 --> 01:12:24,757 and they haven't affected you once. 1192 01:12:24,966 --> 01:12:27,969 No Olympic hurdler's ever affected anyone. 1193 01:12:28,177 --> 01:12:30,221 You know, Grandma's not good at anything. 1194 01:12:30,429 --> 01:12:32,139 She's not good at a thing. 1195 01:12:32,348 --> 01:12:35,434 And you told me that she's affected you 1196 01:12:35,643 --> 01:12:38,145 the most out of any person in your whole life. 1197 01:12:40,731 --> 01:12:42,859 I'm the only one who knows that. 1198 01:12:43,067 --> 01:12:44,443 I guess I wanna be somebody like that. 1199 01:13:23,149 --> 01:13:23,816 Huh? 1200 01:13:31,824 --> 01:13:33,367 Oh. Hi. 1201 01:13:33,576 --> 01:13:36,454 Hey. I'm locked out. 1202 01:13:36,662 --> 01:13:38,998 Uh, okay. I'll come wait with you. 1203 01:13:45,212 --> 01:13:46,297 - Hey. - Hey. 1204 01:13:48,883 --> 01:13:51,761 I'm not locked out. I just wanted to see your face. 1205 01:13:51,969 --> 01:13:52,720 Oh. 1206 01:13:52,929 --> 01:13:55,514 Ouch. Sorry about that. 1207 01:13:55,723 --> 01:13:59,560 Yeah. Uh, it's okay. My mom did some of it. 1208 01:13:59,769 --> 01:14:01,437 It's kinda been one of those nights. 1209 01:14:01,646 --> 01:14:02,897 Freezing my tits off. 1210 01:14:03,105 --> 01:14:04,440 My nipples are about to rip through my shirt. 1211 01:14:04,649 --> 01:14:05,775 Paughs] 1212 01:14:05,983 --> 01:14:08,861 Um, do you wanna... 1213 01:14:09,070 --> 01:14:11,030 - Wanna go inside? - Yeah, sure. 1214 01:14:17,495 --> 01:14:18,704 What happened in here? 1215 01:14:18,913 --> 01:14:21,499 Oh. Uh... Shh. We had this big party. 1216 01:14:25,002 --> 01:14:27,046 Oh, um... 1217 01:14:27,254 --> 01:14:30,883 Speaking of parties, Aisley's throwing this big, uh, beach party 1218 01:14:31,092 --> 01:14:34,095 like a funeral party for Maria's resurrection. 1219 01:14:34,303 --> 01:14:36,430 It's kind of your party, too. 1220 01:14:36,639 --> 01:14:39,225 Yeah. Yeah. I like... I like parties. 1221 01:14:40,434 --> 01:14:41,102 Okay. 1222 01:14:42,979 --> 01:14:45,314 Hey, Anastasia. 1223 01:14:45,523 --> 01:14:47,775 I'm really sorry that I put my name in your boyfriend's phone number entry. 1224 01:14:48,818 --> 01:14:50,778 Good. 1225 01:14:50,987 --> 01:14:53,155 You must have some pretty big balls to pull off a stunt like that. 1226 01:14:54,949 --> 01:14:55,992 No, I don't have balls. 1227 01:14:57,493 --> 01:14:59,286 I do have balls. 1228 01:14:59,495 --> 01:15:02,164 I don't have metaphorical balls, but I do have testicles. 1229 01:15:03,457 --> 01:15:04,166 Right. 1230 01:15:10,965 --> 01:15:12,299 Human sex series? 1231 01:15:12,508 --> 01:15:14,593 Uh, that's a sex book my mom gave me. 1232 01:15:14,802 --> 01:15:16,137 She's teaching me to be a badass. 1233 01:15:20,516 --> 01:15:22,059 These people look like they're depressed. 1234 01:15:24,645 --> 01:15:26,147 I'm pretty sure whoever wrote this book 1235 01:15:26,355 --> 01:15:28,858 never had actual enjoyable sex before. 1236 01:15:29,066 --> 01:15:29,734 Yeah. 1237 01:15:30,985 --> 01:15:31,736 What would that even look like? 1238 01:15:32,903 --> 01:15:35,489 Uh, something like this. 1239 01:15:35,698 --> 01:15:38,826 Ah! 1240 01:15:44,123 --> 01:15:47,126 Why? What would... What would your sex face look like? 1241 01:15:47,334 --> 01:15:52,381 Oh, wow. 1242 01:15:52,590 --> 01:15:55,843 I think maybe the book's right. 1243 01:15:56,052 --> 01:15:57,970 Is there anything your mom doesn't teach you? 1244 01:15:58,179 --> 01:16:00,181 No. No. 1245 01:16:00,389 --> 01:16:02,349 No, she's really thorough. 1246 01:16:02,558 --> 01:16:03,601 She's pretty much my best friend. 1247 01:16:15,571 --> 01:16:18,199 Did your mom teach you how to do that? 1248 01:16:18,407 --> 01:16:19,784 No. 1249 01:16:21,327 --> 01:16:24,455 No. I usually practice on my hand. 1250 01:16:24,663 --> 01:16:27,124 That was way better. That was way better. 1251 01:16:27,333 --> 01:16:28,292 Oh, wow. 1252 01:16:29,627 --> 01:16:32,963 Wow. That was pretty great. 1253 01:16:33,172 --> 01:16:35,382 I think I'm gonna pass out. Oh. 1254 01:16:43,307 --> 01:16:44,850 Does this mean we're together now? 1255 01:16:45,059 --> 01:16:47,937 No, Liam, we're just friends. 1256 01:16:49,188 --> 01:16:50,564 Oh. 1257 01:16:50,773 --> 01:16:53,317 Wow, my first girlfriend and breakup in 30 seconds. 1258 01:16:54,610 --> 01:16:55,361 Friends who kissed. 1259 01:16:56,570 --> 01:16:57,780 - Hmm. - Twice. 1260 01:17:01,325 --> 01:17:02,952 Oh. 1261 01:17:03,160 --> 01:17:05,704 Some days, yeah, you're the guy who picks A. 1262 01:17:33,107 --> 01:17:35,776 Here we are again. My last day at public school. 1263 01:17:42,408 --> 01:17:43,200 You can begin... 1264 01:17:46,162 --> 01:17:47,496 now. 1265 01:17:55,713 --> 01:17:58,465 - Here we are. - Here we are again. 1266 01:17:58,674 --> 01:18:00,634 Now the bell's gonna ring soon. 1267 01:18:00,843 --> 01:18:03,345 Good to know. Um, listen, I... 1268 01:18:03,554 --> 01:18:05,055 I'm sorry I didn't get back to you. 1269 01:18:05,264 --> 01:18:07,766 I just, you know, I... You are Liam's principal 1270 01:18:07,975 --> 01:18:09,894 -and it felt-- - Yeah. No, I... No, I know, I know. 1271 01:18:10,102 --> 01:18:12,188 - No, just hold on one second. Just... - It felt... 1272 01:18:12,396 --> 01:18:15,107 - It felt inappropriate, could be the word... - Just wait for it. 1273 01:18:15,316 --> 01:18:18,110 -...because I... I... - And... 1274 01:18:20,446 --> 01:18:22,489 - You know your bells. flaughs] - Oh, yeah, well... 1275 01:18:22,698 --> 01:18:24,825 That bell means it's officially summer, 1276 01:18:25,034 --> 01:18:26,994 which means I'm no longer you son's principal. 1277 01:18:30,664 --> 01:18:33,459 - Oh! - Hmm. 1278 01:18:40,633 --> 01:18:44,136 Still 53 minutes left. Wanna check anything over? 1279 01:18:44,345 --> 01:18:45,095 Nope. 1280 01:18:46,472 --> 01:18:47,223 Cocksucker. 1281 01:18:48,766 --> 01:18:51,060 Wow, did you plan that out? 1282 01:18:51,268 --> 01:18:53,062 Actually, I did. Yeah. 1283 01:18:53,270 --> 01:18:57,191 Uh, I saw you come in and I got the secretary to ring the bell. 1284 01:18:57,399 --> 01:18:59,860 It's 1:15. These kids are confused. In get! 1285 01:19:00,069 --> 01:19:02,279 The class is still going. Guys! Guys! 1286 01:19:02,488 --> 01:19:04,114 Class is still in. That was a mistake. 1287 01:19:04,323 --> 01:19:06,909 Martin. Martin? Martin? Put your... Martin! 1288 01:19:07,117 --> 01:19:10,162 Putyourphone back in your pocket and get back into class. 1289 01:19:22,216 --> 01:19:23,884 Go ahead. Open it. 1290 01:19:24,093 --> 01:19:25,219 You already opened it. 1291 01:19:25,427 --> 01:19:26,470 You double-aced it. 1292 01:19:26,679 --> 01:19:28,764 - I know. - Oh! 1293 01:19:28,973 --> 01:19:32,184 I can't wait to visit my little baby in Cambridge. Sorry, little man. 1294 01:19:32,393 --> 01:19:35,312 Why are you all dressed up? Are you going out with that principal man again? 1295 01:19:35,521 --> 01:19:37,106 No. Slash yes. 1296 01:19:38,732 --> 01:19:40,526 What do you think when I say the word "Trojan"? 1297 01:19:40,734 --> 01:19:42,611 None of your business. 1298 01:19:42,820 --> 01:19:43,737 But do you really wanna know? 1299 01:19:43,946 --> 01:19:44,863 No. No. 1300 01:19:51,203 --> 01:19:54,123 - Yahoo! - lt's beautiful! 1301 01:19:54,331 --> 01:19:55,666 - Honey. - Mmm. 1302 01:19:55,874 --> 01:19:58,085 Try putting a hot dog stand right next to a gym 1303 01:19:58,294 --> 01:20:00,671 or an ice cream shop next to a health food store. 1304 01:20:00,879 --> 01:20:03,090 You see the key is to combine torture with pleasure. 1305 01:20:04,967 --> 01:20:07,052 You know, I always wanted a sister, 1306 01:20:07,261 --> 01:20:09,430 but the only thing I got was Maria here and I mean, he's terrible. 1307 01:20:11,515 --> 01:20:12,725 You guys wanna make out? 1308 01:20:12,933 --> 01:20:14,393 -L'm game. -l'm game. 1309 01:20:14,601 --> 01:20:15,644 Game. 1310 01:20:23,986 --> 01:20:27,156 A little more of that. 1311 01:20:27,364 --> 01:20:30,075 Some days, you don't end up with the one-legged girl. 1312 01:20:37,875 --> 01:20:40,544 You know why they first started calling evening "evening"? 1313 01:20:40,753 --> 01:20:42,338 No. No, I don't. 1314 01:20:42,546 --> 01:20:45,007 Because it's the day evening out with the night. 1315 01:20:45,215 --> 01:20:46,133 Hmm. 1316 01:20:46,342 --> 01:20:47,259 Not quite day, not quite night. 1317 01:20:47,468 --> 01:20:48,802 Right. So the in-between time? 1318 01:20:49,011 --> 01:20:50,804 - Yeah, interesting, right? - Yeah, very interesting. 1319 01:20:51,013 --> 01:20:52,973 Yeah, I never thought of it that way. 1320 01:20:53,182 --> 01:20:55,976 Hey, you know, I really liked the choices that you made for your classes, 1321 01:20:56,185 --> 01:20:58,479 especially cultural club. You know, I got kicked out of that one. 1322 01:20:58,687 --> 01:21:00,481 Uh, yeah. I saw. 1323 01:21:00,689 --> 01:21:04,610 - L'm white. - I noticed, yeah. 1324 01:21:04,818 --> 01:21:07,237 I really liked being Maria Sanchez. 1325 01:21:07,446 --> 01:21:08,447 Yeah, I like being Maria, too. 1326 01:21:10,199 --> 01:21:11,283 I wonder what it's like being you. 1327 01:21:13,327 --> 01:21:14,745 Hi, I'm Liam Heap. 1328 01:21:14,953 --> 01:21:16,789 Hi, Liam Heap. Maria Sanchez. 1329 01:21:16,997 --> 01:21:18,999 Well, it's nice to meet you. 1330 01:21:20,793 --> 01:21:22,544 Some days, you aren't Maria. 1331 01:21:24,296 --> 01:21:25,464 - You got everything? - Yes. Yes. 1332 01:21:25,672 --> 01:21:27,049 Stop asking. 1333 01:21:32,679 --> 01:21:34,223 All right! 1334 01:21:36,934 --> 01:21:40,145 I got you one last thing. 1335 01:21:40,354 --> 01:21:41,438 What? 1336 01:21:41,647 --> 01:21:43,440 - To make some friends. - No. 1337 01:21:44,942 --> 01:21:46,777 That's awesome. 1338 01:21:46,985 --> 01:21:48,946 All right, put your seatbelt on. Let's get out of here. 1339 01:21:49,154 --> 01:21:50,989 Some days, you end up with your mom. 1340 01:22:16,014 --> 01:22:17,224 I miss you already. 1341 01:22:19,268 --> 01:22:20,436 I miss you, too. 1342 01:22:58,390 --> 01:23:00,601 Hello, everyone. Welcome to space. 1343 01:23:00,809 --> 01:23:01,435 Whoo! 1344 01:23:02,686 --> 01:23:03,520 Gary McKeniz. 1345 01:23:05,022 --> 01:23:05,856 Hmm. Emma Mitchell. 1346 01:23:07,608 --> 01:23:09,693 - Lucy Quine. - Here. 1347 01:23:11,361 --> 01:23:12,279 Maria Sanchez. 1348 01:23:16,033 --> 01:23:16,950 Maria Sanchez? 1349 01:23:18,702 --> 01:23:20,579 Here. Sorry. 1350 01:23:23,123 --> 01:23:24,666 Jennifer Stewart. 1351 01:23:29,171 --> 01:23:29,922 Baker, Tom. 1352 01:23:31,423 --> 01:23:32,466 Hi, 1353 01:23:38,430 --> 01:23:41,433 And some days, you just... 97481