All language subtitles for 1969.TwoUnderco

[organ playing wedding march ♪]

[woman 1]
To close our show,
we bring you a top creation

from the House of Doré,

our wedding dress, Babette...

[woman 2] Nice.

[woman 1]
a misty dream out of organza
and embroidery.

Ladies and gentlemen,
I thank you,

in the name of our house,
for your interest.

[woman 3]
A beautiful and thrilling model.

[woman 1]
We would love
to welcome you again

at our next show.

[applause]

[man]
It's too bad that a divorce
is so expensive.

[woman 2] Oh, George,
you're really awful.

Really.
There's attorneys.

[man]
Yeah, it just costs too much.

Lida, the mistress would like
to speak with you immediately.

Now, come on.
Hurry up, darling.

Yes, I'm going already.

[knock on door]

[woman] Yes?
Please come in.

You called for me?

[woman]
You look wonderful, child.

Lida, I've got a favor
to ask of you.

Yes?

- Mr. Radeck has asked me to...
- Yes, but you know...

Yes, yes, I know you have
separated from Mr. Radeck,

and I don't know your grounds,

and it doesn't concern me,

but I-I have spoken,
a while ago, to Mr. Radeck.

He is suffering very much
under this separation,

and he asked me to arrange
a talk with you.

Madam, that's quite impossible.

Lida, you've been working
for me for the last two years

and I hope you've always
felt at home here.

You've had
every wish fulfilled.

Yes, I know, Madam, but in this
case, it really doesn't go.

You see, Lida,
I'm in a difficult situation.

Mr. Radeck wasn't only
a good customer of mine,

I'm also personally obliged

because my business hasn't
always run so well as now.

He has often helped me out.

Child, you must meet him.
I really don't see
any other possibilities.

- Speak with him.
- When?

He should be here
at any moment,

and I would be very thankful
if you would wait for him.

Good, Madam.
But I'm only doing it for you.

Thank you.

Sometimes I don't
understand this world.

Radeck is really
a wonderful man.

And besides that...

I know he really loves you.

Be a little nice to him,
my child.

♪

Ah...

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One should really be married.

Ah?
[giggles]

So...

[splashy jazz music ♪]

[music stops]

Gloria?
Are you still waiting?

[singing softly to herself]

Marian?

Gloria?

[softly singing]

[ominous music ♪]

[screaming]

No!
Oh, no!

Oh!
[screaming]

[muffled struggling]

♪

[yawns]

Ghastly...

[groans]

Disgusting...

[crying out]

No!
[screams]

Oh, no! Oh!

♪

"In the mountaintop cities,
wind in the treetops,

you can hear hardly a breath
of the still desert evening..."

[canvas tears, jingling]

♪

[canvas tearing]

[gasps]

Well, here goes.

Huh?

Huh.

[grunting]

[groans]

♪

[man] Yeah, come on over.
I got something for you.

Just a second.
Good morning, Inspector.

Good morning.

[man] Yes, naturally
I'll come to dinner.

Yes, I love you.

No, won't touch a drop.

Yes, that's good.

Yes, certainly.

Is that true
what's written here?

Your name
is Napoleon Bolivar?

Yes, but I can't help it.
My father wanted it that way.

I'm not happy about it either.

So, my friend, we know exactly
what this woman looks like.

We must verify it, that's all.

She had quite a well-built
figure, hadn't she?

No, quite slender.

Hair color was blond, right?

No idea.
She was wearing a hood.

- Black eyes?
- Green.

- Green?
- Believe me.

But lots of tits, huh?

Ah, well, I've seen better.
She wasn't that stacked.

You must remember exactly.
Your evidence
is very important.

It's just, I know, but-
but, I can't...

I can't seem to remember
anything anymore.

I really got a terrible,
terrible headache.

When she hit me,
I didn't know it was coming.

She really knocked me
for a loop.

Yes, I wasn't even
thinking anything bad,

and then suddenly
I flew through the air,

and then
I was already dreaming.

And anything else?

No.
No, actually nothing.

That is, I mean yes.

She was wonderful...

I mean, you know, Inspector,

she would be something to marry
if she could just cook.

[phone buzzes]

Hello?

Ankara's on the line.

[woman groans]

I don't want to.
I'm not here.

Come on, it's Ankara.

[gasps]
Ankara!

My God, one just can't get up
when one hasn't anything on.

Thank you.

[pleasant jazz music ♪]

Come on, give it here.

Hello, Mr. Radeck, please.

What did you say?

Yes, my dear, we are all
secretaries at the right time...

and with the right boss.

Hmm...

That will be expensive.

Ah, he's really not there?
My God.

Ah, he's hard to reach?
Where could he be?

Ah, you have a message for me?

That sounds better.
Now let me hear it.

Uh huh?

She wants to know the password,
what should I do?

You've got to say it.

Listen... All right.

I'll give you the password.
Lida.

We've tried everything already,

but he's so busy,
he's always someplace.

Oh, listen here...
Uh-huh.

Then I'll see to it that
I'll meet him at his apartment,

but he should follow
my instructions exactly.

All right. He must be
in his bedroom at midnight,

alone, in the dark,

then it will continue.
[smooches]

Very good.
And I thought you only had men
in your head.

[sighs]

I'm completely exhausted.

Can I sleep on?

I was just so involved.

I dreamed I was with Paul,

and all alone, he took me
in his strong arms,

and he kissed me.
How wonderful.

Which Paul?

Paul Newman, of course.

[laughs]
So, if you work hard, I'll give
him to you for Christmas.

I don't like it when you drag
my true love through the mud.

I really love him.
[laughs]

[whistling]

Good day, Mister.

Why did you call the police,
huh?

I had to do it.
Someone had attacked me.

That picture was gone,
and I thought...

Huh?
What did you think?

[Napoleon stammering]

I think I made a big mistake.

I told you too much
and that was dangerous.

What did you tell the police?

Truthfully, truthfully, I...

I wouldn't say anything.
[grunts]

♪

[thud]

[yawns]

Don't make a move.
[man gasps]

As you can see, I'm punctual.
I have something for you.

[man] Who is it?

[woman] Is that it?

Yes, and it's horrible.

Who painted Lida like that?

You've never seen
that picture before?

No, never.

Is it possible that Lida
posed for that picture
without you knowing about it?

Impossible.

It's impossible, I know that.

A few days
before she disappeared, she...

began to paint on herself

an artificial sort of birthmark
like that, but...

Well, it's absolutely
clear now.

That picture was painted
after her disappearance.

Well then,
I'm on the right track.

I will continue,

but it will cost you $50,000.

I'll agree.

I've gotta have that girl back
because I love her,

and please, find out
who painted that picture.

All right.
Give me $25,000
as first payment.

The other $25,000 you'll pay
when I bring Lida,
dead or alive.

Here are your $25,000.
It's my personal check.

- Don't move.
- Take it.

Don't turn on the light,
and sing something nice

so that I know
you're still here.

All right.

Good night.
You'll hear from me.

Please!
What should I sing?

I can't sing.
I'm absolutely unmusical.

All right, then.

♪ Count Oliver
wandered mornings ♪

♪ Along the beach at San Juan

♪ to give his horse
some water ♪

♪ To give his horse
some water ♪

♪ To give his horse...

Aren't you well?

What a stupid question.
I feel perfect.

I thought I heard
the sir singing.

Well, certainly I was singing.
What's the matter now?

Didn't you think
it was all right?

So then,
I didn't make a mistake?

No.

I'm very happy that art is
still appreciated in our house,

even if it is so late.
Good night, sir.

Good night.

Ouch!

Quiet.
You're too fat for Paul.

There are all those photos.

In the last two years,
there have been eight women

disappearing under
the same circumstances.

What gives you the idea
that they were all murdered?

There are other reasons
why women disappear.

You ran away
more than once yourself,

and not only from home.
Isn't that so?

Don't talk so stupidly.

That fits to me.

- There again, you're right.
- What do you want?

Men love dumb women,
and that's the most
important thing for me.

If that makes you happy,
but it is really so.

All those cases are similar
in some way.

Everywhere, the same
traces of violence.

But most men
are slightly brutal.

Do tell me.

There must be a guy
with long and strong
fingernails like claws.

- Do you like that too?
- Oh!

The evidence and places
of occurrence fit together.

Here, on one of
the Caribbean islands,

on Topa Tara,
a mulatto disappears,

traces of a battle
in her bungalow.

On different pieces
can be found scratches

that run parallel
and are very deep.

You see, it's always the same.

A few months later,
Camilla Pearson,

a model, disappears.

A similar case.

She was last seen with a man,
about 40 years old,

southern type.

Camilla's last residence
was a third-class hotel.

All the girls
were either dancers,
photo models, or mannequins.

No one knows whether the girls
are dead or not.

They could have been kidnapped,
but I don't believe it,

because if it dealt
with white traffic

one could find out
about it through the
international organizations.

Only in the case with Lida
is there any evidence,

and that's the photo.

What does your masculine
intellect make of it?

Well, if you saw the picture,

you might think it was painted
at the hour of her death.

That would mean we are dealing
with an insane murderer.

What kind of case
do you always choose?

I don't think for a second
that I'll be the next victim.

[laughs]
Afraid?

[footsteps]

Come on over here.

There!
[man grunting]

But, my ladies, do you treat
all your guests this way?

Only our favorite.
What do you want?

Mr. Lamoins sent me.

I'm supposed to look
at your house.

Ah ha.

He said you're only here
for a short while,

and I am looking
for something in this size,

and secondly,
I like the situation I'm in.

I mean, of course,
when I think it over,

I can stand it like this.

Hold me tight, my darling,
and never let me go.

How did you get in here?

How else?
Through the door.

You must understand
I've got a peculiar habit.

- I always go through doors.
- Peculiar bird.

Do you like him,
or shall we throw him out?

Oh, mamma mia,
don't do that to me.
Just let me get up.

You have no idea
who you are sending away.

Well, let's hear it.

You'll hardly believe it.

I'm Vittorio Freda.

Hmm.

It's very nice here.
Yes, I like it very much.

I'll be staying here
this winter.

Did you do this
all by yourselves?

I did the foundation,
she did the rest.

Now you've seen everything,
so get lost.

No, I still haven't
seen the bedroom.

Sorry to disappoint you.

You can't go in there
right now.
Paul Newman's there.

I'll wait.

Ah, is my throat dry
again today?
How 'bout a drink?

I only have a Coke
in the fridge.

I'm not sure
you deserve having it.

What a pity it would be.

May I ask you to disappear
the same way you came in:

- through the door.
- Yes, yes, yes.

I always go through the door.
That's what I had said.

But, children, this is a day
of the missed opportunities.

I must see you again!
Ciao!

I'll never live this down.

I really don't care
for that type.

I find him wonderful.

Oh, you find them
all wonderful,
but now we're going to work.

No, I do't want to.
I don't feel like it.

I thought you wanted
to earn some money.

You should think of Hollywood.

We need diamonds
as big as nuts.

What should I do?

I'd say that you take
Dress Number 3A,
and then to the gallery.

Oh!
It's really wonderful!

Fantastic!

Even at the entrance,
these treasures!

Oh, and there!
I'm overwhelmed, enthused!

Exciting!
Such a beautiful child,
and so much blood!

Are you the Master?

I'm a critic.
Ask over there.

Oh, wonderful.
Exorbitant.

I'll ask over there.

One doesn't know
where one should first look.

Aw, doesn't she look
like Snow White?

As if she were asleep.

Scatterbrained female.

Oh, only once to be tied
like that.

- That could be had.
- Are your the creator?

Sorry, no.

But the Master must be
somewhere to be found.

- Are you him?
- Oh, no.

That statue over there.

- Do you work here, my good man?
- [man] Yes.

Please see to it
that I can meet the Master.

I might want to buy
a few of his pieces...

for cash.

[man]
I'm sorry, but Mr. Tiller
is not here.

That's unbelievable.

He must dedicate himself
to his business.

[laughter]

[man] Please, come with me.

Excuse me, but this lady
would like to speak to you.

Good day, madam.

I've got you.

Now I can live, Master.

Oh, no, I'm just the director
of the gallery.

- Please, have a seat.
- Thank you.

I'm very happy that I've
been able to meet you.

My name
is Anastasia Dos Santos.

I am the
Countess de la Contagia,

and the Marquesa
Cumbre Sadinas.

Oh, my beloved Director,
many pieces from your house

will beautify my lonely life
in Brazil.

I would like to buy pictures,
especially statues.

I love statues
more than anything else.

Oh, madam, please.

I'm very unhappy
that I must tell you...

My dear friend, I must
get to know the Master.

I cannot live without the
Master and his works anymore.

And you,
you will really help me.

I will pay you
any price for it,

and I will do anything
for the one who fulfills
my heart's desire.

My dear Director.

But that is impossible.

I understand.
He is a sensitive man.

Some sort of genius.

What was his name?
Something like Papagano?

- Paganini?
- No!

His name is Klaus Tiller...

but he talks to no one.

I'm not so sure about that.

If he would only see me, then
perhaps I could model for him.

I do have a wonderful figure.

Hmm, with some imagination
one could imagine that.

Nevertheless,
I have to disappoint you.

You can't get to meet him
because he's not here.

You dare tell a Cumbre Sadina
such a lie?

Please believe me.

Even I only get to
talk to his lawyer.

Mr. Tiller himself,
I've never seen.

But the worst of it is that
I am not authorized to sell.

Not even one of
his works of art.

Even for that you
would have to contact
his personal lawyer in Paris.

But I'll do everything
in my power...

Oh, you are so generous, Mr...

Albert.
Albert Carimbaldi.

Oh, my dear Albert,

I would like
to return my gratitude,

but I just don't know how.

I am agreeable.

Please consider me
at your disposal.

Then I can expect you
this evening?

I have a heavenly bungalow.

The summer night
will inspire us,

and Mantovani's violins
will enchant us.

♪ La da-da da da,
da da da ♪

Most gracious lady.

I'll use this afternoon
to rest myself

so that I'll be fresh
this evening.

So far I've played along,
but now it's the end!

Now listen to me.

I've already told you,
I don't want that grandpa

and I keep telling you
no, no, no!

- Darling...
- Leave me alone.

Look here.
You want to earn money,
then one must work a bit.

- Mm-mm.
- That's the way it is.

You're almost at your goal.

You in Las Vegas,
and Frankie-boy comes,

and then he greets you,
personally.

And Dean Martin
stands at the bar,

and Frankie sings,
only for you,

"Strangers in the Night."

Then you've got them both.
Dean and Frankie.

Dean and Frankie, yes,
that would be heavenly.

What do I have now?
My grandfather.

You must, you must, you must!

Swallow it, my darling.
Okay?

I'll get the microphones ready.
We haven't much time.

[pleasant jazz music ♪]

Oh...

Maybe this
will bring us further.

And don't get too undressed so
he doesn't get a heart attack.

And please stay around
the microphone all the time.

And how?

They way you always do it.
On the couch.

Hmm, that's him now.
I think it's starting.

Okay. Good luck.

[softly singing to herself]

Oh, Director.

Oh, Countess,
I am so happy to see you.

May I...

- Oh, such wonderful flowers.
- A little present.

You're a cavalier
of the old school.

- Your hat, please.
- Thank you.

Dear Director, I've got
to serve you myself.

I let the servant
off for tonight
so we wouldn't be disturbed.

- Careful.
- I'll manage.

[sighs]

A drink, Albert?

Yes, please,
but not too strong.

I invented a cocktail
especially for you.

Certainly something mild.

We both want to have something
from this evening.

Don't we, my dear?

[laughs seductively]

Just a moment, dear Director.

♪

- Ouch.
- Shh!

- Watch out.
- Did you call me?

Oh, yes.

That is the wild cry of passion

that the women of my land
call to the man they love

as they chase them
through the pampas.

- That hurt me.
- I didn't know
you were near-sighted.

Now...

A little rum...

and a little olive oil...

[giggling]

Be careful.
We still need him.

And on top of that,
a little whiskey.

That'll make it good.

You're brutal.

Small fry.

Countess, you were gone
so long.

I've missed you so.

Thank you.

Please.

[choking]

Is it too strong for you?

Yes...

Ugh...

Oh, you are wonderful.

Breathtakingly beautiful.

My dear Director, you wanted
to tell me about the painter.

About the painter
we can talk later on.

No, tell me about the Master.

You know I need him
like I need air to breathe.

Air, air, yes, it's getting
too warm for me too.

My beloved, come back.

- Couldn't we just...
- That's impossible.

I've very little on.
Haven't you noticed that yet?

And if I get in a draft...

Come on over here.

Absolutely not.
Not on the sofa.

I certainly couldn't talk
to you about painters.

I'm a quiet and discreet lover,
understand?

Oh.
What, the flowers?

I find it romantic
when the perfume of flowers
surrounds me.

But let's talk
about the Master.

I don't know anything more
about him than you.

He paints and he is a sculptor.

But he does contact you about
business matters, doesn't he?

No, no. We do everything
through his lawyer.

Well then, I can never buy
one of his works...

Yes, through one single person.

- Who is that?
- Me.

Oh, and you'll help me?

[groans]
My dear child,

I'll do everything for you,
but it's not so easy.

What's the matter?

That cocktail was wonderful,
but I think it is
confusing me completely.

That's what happens
when one drinks only one,

and so I'll quickly
mix another

for my little pampas sweetie.

[both giggling]

He's too far from the mic.
I can't hear a word.

That isn't important now.
I've just thought of something.

You know, those pictures
in the gallery are similar

to the photos of the girls
who disappeared.

Exactly like I told you
about the figure I had seen.

Then try to buy
whatever he'll sell.

I'm happy enough if I can get
the figure we really need.

Then besides that,
it's a question of the money.

I don't like to part with it
that easily.

- To the next one.
- Exert yourself.

Mm-hmm.

♪

Here I am.

Yoohoo!

- There.
- Thank you.

Cheers.

Why don't you take
your jacket off?
You were so warm.

[slurring]
You really don't have
anything against it?

Oh, you should feel
at home here.

My house is yours.

Olé.

[both giggling]

You little tiger.

And now we'll play a game that
the women of my country love.

I ask you something and by
every answer that is correct

you get a piece of my wardrobe.

That's a fair offer so
everybody gets what he wants.

Do you agree with that?

Yes, just ask me.
Ask me.

For the first question:
Who is the Master?

Personally, only his attorney
knows him.

He lives in Paris.

And what is the name
of his attorney?

Barker.
Barker's his name.

I can't hear anything.
Louder! Louder!

A little louder, please.

The man is named Barker.
Barker in Paris.

[slurring indiscernibly]

- Please, give me some.
- Guess what.

A shoe, oh well.

♪

What's the matter, darling?

I believe I saw someone
rushing by over there.

Quiet down.
I'm by your side, honey.

Yes.

And now I have a special wish
for you to fulfill.

Sell me the Figure Number 12
out of the catalogue,
my darling.

Whatever you want
I'll sell to you.

Everything you want,
just keep asking.

- The Figure 12.
- It is yours.

I agree.
Do you want it on paper?

Yes.

Yes, but finally,
give me a piece.

Just a moment.

I'm only getting
a pencil and paper.

Here we are.

But I-I just... can't sign
a blank piece of paper.

Then we'll go into my office
and make out a contract.

No, that'll take
too long for me.

You wouldn't cheat me.
I'll believe you so.

- Here.
- Thanks.

Which piece?

Ask him the price.

Come on, ask more questions.

Come on!
The price!

Come on,
I can't wait any longer.

Hmm, and what must your little
darling pay for the figure?

10,000, that's all.

Ooh, that's way too much.

How much you wanna pay?

Half of that.

Oh, good.
Okay, it's sold.

Who...
Who is that?

Good evening.

- My personal maid.
- Your maid?

I thought you had given her
the night off.

Yes, but she made a mistake.

But why?
What does she want here?

She hasn't got anything on.

The poor child
is given to sleepwalking.

Don't wake her up.
Let's keep on playing.

Answer my last question and
you can take everything off.

[giggling]

I can't stand it anymore.
Ask me more.

I will.

Please tell me
the name of the painter, hmm?

Klaus Tiller.

No, that's not his real name.

That's only
his professional name.

I want to know his real name.
I must know it.

And I thought you didn't want
a fully-dressed countess.

His real name is...

[cries out]

Come on!
Hurry!

[jazz music ♪]

[gunshots]

[gunshots]

Nuts!
He's gotten away.

We've neglected our
morning gymnastics, my child.

Mm-hmm.

Tell me...

What are we going to
do with our guest?

Take him away, what else?

We can't have any police here.

We'll first take him down
into the garage.

Huh?

That's not necessary.

Where could he be?

- The tape recorder!
- It can't be true!

What do you mean?

Here, there must be
something on it.

Naturally.

[tape rewinding]

[both giggling]

[man on recording]
Come on, we've got to hurry
before they return.

[indistinct speech]

I know him.
Who is that?

Sounds a lot
like my beautiful Italian.

Think once
about something else.

Hello, friends!

It's starting now!

One, two, three!

[upbeat music ♪]

♪

♪

Oh, Mr. Tiller!

This is a surprise.

I didn't think
you'd come again.

But I always keep my promise.

Come, sit down here beside me.

May I offer you
a glass of champagne?

Mmm.

Did you find it good?

You were wonderful.

The idea with the tights
was very good.

The new number is still better.

I'd very much like
to do it for you.

Why not?

And now,
here's to the most beautiful

and gifted dancer that
I have met in a long time.

Thank you.

♪

Mmm, I love champagne,

and you know I'm part French,

and I'd like to be
alone with you.

Mm?

[woman giggling]

Here, take my hand.

[woman] All right.

Aw, lovely.

When we were children we used
to play in the attic, too.

But I am no longer
a child anymore.

Oh, oh, it's so nice
and dark here.

Where are you?

[giggling, moaning]

But... you can't see my number!

Wait. No.

No!
Who are you?

[stammering]

[screaming]

[screaming continues]

[growling]

[man]
Yeah...

Boy, there sure is
a lot of junk around here.

There she is.
You can load her up.

Okay, fellas,
take a hold of it.

Be careful now.

Behind these lines, suddenly
there comes the shock,

the primeval violence
of fright,

and with these colors
is a composition of genius.

The break between body and...

Oh, excuse me, I didn't mean
to disturb you.

You're not bothering.
Come on in.

Oh, is it fantastic!

I am so happy that I finally
possess a work of the Master.

Are you the manager?

I'd like to pick up my figure.

No, he is not.
I am the manager.

I represent Mr. Carimbaldi.

Well, I've come for
the Figure Number 12.

Mm-hmm.

Number 12 was sold
to the Countess Cumbre Sadinas.

Is that you?

And I would like to have
that picture as well.

No, that is impossible.

Yes, the is the signature
of Mr. Carimbaldi,

but I'm sorry, we'll have
to wait until he comes.

And when will that be?

- That I don't know either.
- Now listen to me.

I bought the figure
and I've paid my 10,000,

now all I want is my property.

Do you understand?

Outside is my moving van
and my workers are waiting.

Yes, but Countess, I really
haven't the authority.

That doesn't interest me and
I'm taking it along with me.

It's absolutely absurd
what people ask of me.

Come on, boys, hurry up.

- I really must protest.
- The contract
is incontestable.

The lady has paid for it,
she can take it with her.

Finally, a reasonable man.

Uh huh?
What is your name, my friend?

Oh, my name is Maloo
and I am from Interpol.

Hm, you've come
at the right time.

We're under police protection,
boys.

I'll hold you responsible
for everything.

You're speaking with
the famous Francis Maloo.

Humph.

[moaning]

Oh!

I want to thank you.
You're really my savior.

Oh, I only want to see
that justice is carried out.

[singing to himself]

I never really knew
that the police
were just wonderful people.

I'd always heard that
the police had the same
tendencies as criminals.

It is said in the modern
criminal psychology.

But you're no criminal.
That can be seen immediately.

Yes, I'm an Englishman.

Ah, I love England.

The Beatles, the Queen,

and... the mail robbers.

You happen to know any of them?

No...

What a pity.

Stop! Stop! Wait!

The lady belongs to me!
Here!

Look, mack, let us
get the thing loaded.

Not one step further!

What do you want of me?
The sculpture belongs to me!

Then you've made
a tremendous mistake.

I am in the right.
Even the police are convinced.

This lady is bound to me
through a contract.

- Here is my receipt.
- I don't care.

- I'll let you...
- Police.

Oh, please forget it.
One wouldn't believe it
looking at you.

Just keep reading.
I'll be glad to put more
documents at your disposal.

Oh, so you have bought it
and you have bought it.

Whatever do you see
in that thing?

She is a unique piece of art.
Load her up.

Stop.
Let go of her.

Maybe you guy'll make up
your mind some time today.

I'd like to eat some lunch,

and my buddies'd like
to get off of work.

She will not be loaded.
That thing belongs to me.

Shut up!

Oh, my dear, dear Inspector,

help a defenseless woman
to her rights, would you?

I got one of those
standing in my garden.

You're here
to protect the weak.

- Yes.
- Do you have any sisters?

Then you must know
how women suffer.

Have you any idea what
it's like inside of me?

- No, not yet.
- Then tell him to take off.

You're absolutely right.

What are you waiting for?
The statue belongs
to the madam.

Bella signorina,
you have insulted an Italian.

I despise you.

Oh, yes, she'll survive.

Okay you guys,
pick that thing up.
Don't break it.

[laughing]

Thank you.

I would really like
to see you again,

but I'm sure you are
a very busy man.

Oh, yes, our work takes it.

I do sometimes have a free day.

Give me your telephone number.

You're a policeman.

Look for me, and if you find me
you can keep me.

Okay.

Cin-cin.

So darling,
you've really earned this.

You're telling me.

I've been working for days
without a break,

knocking around
with Italian playboys here,
seducing grandfathers,

and you lie in the sun
and watch over your...

luxurious body.

There's nothing
we can do about it.
We've got to find your playboy.

We'll have to turn
the whole city upside down,

but it can't be so difficult.

There are only a few bars
frequented by these types.

And where shall we start?
In the Flamingo.

[upbeat music ♪]

♪

♪

[music ends ♪]

[applause]

See to it that nothing
happens to me.

You park over there, and if I
come out with somebody,

you follow me.
Okay?

Yes, but before breakfast,
please.

- Ciao.
- Ciao.

Yes, my friends,
there's more to come.

Keeps on going exactly so.

You've been waiting
for this number.

♪

[inaudible]

You haven't been here
for a long time.

Yes, I've had a lot to do,
you know.

Don't be so stubborn.
Come on.

Oh, so you mean actually
dance with you?

Yes, sweetie.

Huh?

♪

Like it here?

Yes.

Olé! Oh, boy.

You dance like a gum teacher,
and you call this relaxing?

Yeah, here you really learn
how to relax.

- Yeah.
- Don't you agree?

It's just warm.

Sometimes I find someone,

but now I've got you
and I'll never let you go.

I wouldn't think of it.

[chuckles]

I've waited much too long
for you.

Oh, excuse me for a minute.
I'll be right back.

All right,
but don't stay too long.

[man] Hello.

Are you, by chance, alone?

Why?
Is that your way
to invite a girl?

Why don't you sit down
and join me for a drink?

♪

Do you always do it like that?

Only when it is with such an
enchanting woman as yourself.

I noticed you
when you walked in.

Yes, I had noticed you were
watching me all the time.

I get compliments like that
from a lot of people.

I'm quite sure of that.

Hmm, I must admit it,

from you I hear it
especially well,

and I don't know why.

Because I mean what I say.
You are a special type.

For example, the way you move
when dancing.

I have worked for many years
as a model.

One learns to do that.

Where do you come from?
You have such
a peculiar accent.

Well, I was born
in a little town...

No, let me guess.

There's such a quiet tone.

Somewhere from the Balkans.

Very good.
I'm a Croat.

You see, I'm not a bad guesser.

Yes, but I have lived for
a long time in North Africa.

Uh?

What's the matter?

I've been waiting for you
and you're here
flirting with a man.

Excuse me, please.

I met an old friend of mine
and won't take very long.

I'll join you right away.
Okay?

Ah, I understand.

Just can't believe it.

Now you must tell me
a little bit about yourself.

What are you interested in?
Where do you come from?

I come from America
and I'm interested in art.

And I am a painter, too.

The coincidences are peculiar,
don't you agree with that?

If you're really
interested in paintings,

I would gladly show you
some of my works.

- Would you like that?
- Yes, why not?

This meeting here tonight for
us is really a stroke of fate.

You must pose for me.

Can you tonight?

Mm-hmm.

It's wonderful!

Such a beautiful garden.

Yes, but it isn't finished yet.

You see, I've only been here
a short while.

[birds calling]

[ominous music ♪]

Please, won't you come in?

Would you care for a drink?

Thank you.

Take your time.

Look around a little.

You see...

here is where I work.

I have finally found a place
where I can bring my ideas
into reality.

Yes.

And here I will create
my masterpiece with you.

May I?

You may.

You had asked me for my name.

You shall know it.

My name is Klaus Tiller.

I painted Lida Regnier
and many other girls.

♪

And now a new work
will be completed.

[breathing loudly]

[gunshot, glass shatters]

[crying out]

[gas hissing]
[coughing]

Come on!

Let's go!

You could have used something
other than that fog bomb.

Next time I'll take
laughing gas.

And I'll take you alive for me.

[laughs]
I can't get any air

because that unshaven idiot
grabbed me around the throat

and then you come along
and give me the rest.

Girls, this was such
a hot night.

And I thought I was so far
that nothing could
excite me anymore.

- Inspector Tanner.
- This is Tanner.

Uh-huh, I'm speaking.
This is Red Lips.

- Is it really you?
- Yes.

Then listen to me very well.

I sent to you by mail

the solution
to a very important case.

Naturally, there's no point
to it if you don't even
read the mail.

Yes, naturally.

Well, take a look now.

Can't you even read?

- It's not here.
- Yes, yes.

It must be there.
I mailed it.

- I think you smoke too much.
- Huh? Nonsense.

That's not healthy.
Have you finally got it?

Yes, yes, I believe this is it.

So then, read it, my dear.

Bye bye.

Hello? Hello?

What nonsense.
Hmm.

[jazz music ♪]

[Red Lips' voice]
My dear Inspector Tanner,

I'm giving you a chance
to arrest a murderer.

His name is Klaus Tiller

and he lives at
Santrinos de la Hara.

Man, do something now.

♪

Hello there!

- [little girl] Hello.
- Huh?

Looking for somebody?

Yes. Who actually lives
in this house?

We live here.

Oh, no. I'm looking for someone
by the name of Tiller.

Tiller?
Don't know him.

[groans]

Okay, then our dear Inspector
has strained himself
for nothing.

I don't care if he has.

I just want to get away
from here.

But Tiller has disappeared
without a clue,

and we're to suffer here.

Understand me finally.

I don't want to wake up
at night

and find a crazy person
coming here in the room

and grabbing me
around the neck.

I want to get away from here.

No one will get you
around your beautiful neck
as long as I'm here.

[boy]
Hello, ladies!

Oh!

What is it?

Flowers for you.

Ah, yes, naturally.
Thank you. Thank you.

- For your balcony.
- Now even the youngsters
are trying tot seduce me.

What a dish.

Hmm. From an unknown admirer.

Isn't that wonderful?
It must be from Maloo.

There's something ticking
inside of it.

- What are you doing?!
- Outside with them!

They're mine! They're mine!
Come back! Come back!

[fast-paced jazz music ♪]

Get down!
[explosion]

Oh, such a dirty deal!

And I was just
at the hairdresser.

Ugh. We had luck.

[gunshots]

[screaming]

[gunshots]

[coughing]
I don't understand
what you have against a trip.

I don't know either.
[coughs]

Maybe for a change
we should go to the sea.

We'll look for a wonderful
island under the blue sky,

and in the area of Ankara,

in case we need money
from Radeck.

We will lie on the sand
and the sun will turn
my body into gold.

[laid-back Latin music ♪]

[people chattering]

[music ends ♪]

[waves crashing]

I've wished for this
for a long time.

Vacation is
something wonderful.

Ah, when the sun burns
on one's stomach...

and one has nothing to do
but to lay around.

We're all alone
and no one to bother us.

♪ La da da-da da-da

- What do you think of this?
- What are you doing here?

Oh, I was just going to
ask you the same.

We're relaxing.
We need our peace.

Say, are you still angry at me
over the sculpture?

[Vittorio laughs]
What do you mean?

How could anyone
be angry at you?

That satisfies me.

The living is short.
One should use every second.

Hey, cut that out.

All right, then.
We'll continue this evening.

You're living at the Macario?
I will call you.

You know that too?

Oh, Vittorio Freda
knows everybody
and everybody knows him.

Oh, how wonderful
that I've met you,

and I hope you'll relax, too.

Ciao, ciao.

♪ La da da da-da dum

Well, relax, Regina.

[sighs]

I don't understand why
you brought that thing along.

The people at customs
thought we were traveling
with a corpse.

It's embarrassing.
[phone ringing]

Do you think I'd leave
this costly item at home?

I've a feeling
we can still use this thing.

Hello? Yes?

It's that playboy for you.

Oh!

Let him invite you and then
bring him back here with you.

We'll check him out
and see what he's up to.

I can't think of anything
better to do

than to check him out.
Hello? Vittorio?

Yes.

[people chattering, traffic]

Good day.

I had reserved a room
under the name of James Bond.

How come the name James Bond?

Then one doesn't notice
we're from the police.

James Bond?

Apartment 45, boy.

[phone buzzes]

How do people get to use
the name James Bond?

Good afternoon, Miss Alphonse.

- Ooh!
- Pardon me.

Oh, pardon me.
I'm awful sorry.

Yes, two rooms for next week.
Okay.

Fine.

♪ She's here again

♪ and it is wonderful

♪ Oh, bella signorina ♪

♪ Oh, bella signorina ♪

♪ Luck has
brought us together ♪

♪ Back here in Napoli

♪ Just like a fragrant
summer flower ♪

♪ Like the fragrance
of a summer night ♪

♪ Are you my life?

♪ Are you my luck?

♪ Oh, bella signorina ♪

[humming ♪]

♪ Luck has
brought us together ♪

♪ So stay with me

♪

[applause]
Thank you. Thank you.

Oh, that was wonderful.

Waiter!

Uh, Number Three, please.

Right away, sir.
But what do you mean
by Number Three?

Why, every child knows
that there are four kinds
of Martini cocktails.

Number One: four part gin
and one part Martini.

Number Two: five parts gin,

and with the cork
from the Martini bottle

lightly over the edge
of the glass.

Number Three:

pure gin and Martini bottle
placed on the table,

and when drinking,
just staring at it.

And Number Four:

Pure gin and always think
about the Martini.

So if I
understand you correctly,

I should bring you
a four-part gin.

Exactly, that's it.

- And some fresh blood for the...
- Yes, sometimes.

Without fantasy, one's life
isn't worth anything,

and one doesn't only need it
when drinking.

Let the blue flower
of your fantasy bloom.

Be careful.
Once I begin I can't stop it.

Hmm?

Did something drop?

No, I find the carpet
so beautiful.

A wonderful old piece.

I'll take care of it.

- So...?
- We can forget about it now.

You forgot to order for the
lady so I brought two of them.

To a blond girl
who can't be matched.

Mm!

Aren't you well?
I hope it isn't serious.

Oh no, my grandmother
always did this
when the drink was too strong.

Down under the table...
and stay like this for a while.

I guess, if it helps.
But don't you find it a little
uncomfortable down here?

Oh, no, I don't mind that.
At least I'm alone
with you, Vittorio.

From me he doesn't get
a single passita.

[giggling]

You are a strange girl.

Who? Me?

Ah, when I think it over,
what I've experienced with you,

it all began on the floor.

There, I couldn't love you
because I was held fast,

and the a statue separated us,

and now we're spending
the night under the table.

I don't now
how I've earned that.

Really...

Now make up your mind at last.

This up and down is getting too
boring for me in the long run.

Come on.
We'll go to my place.

With pleasure.
But right away, then.

[ominous music ♪]

[sighs]

Come on, darling.

♪

[sigh, yawn]

♪

[screams]

[gunshot]

Good evening.

I'm very grateful to you.
Who are you?

What are you doing here?

I'm a friend.
Just passing by.

Don't be frightened.
You can go back to sleep.

The matter is settled for now,

but please, give my very best
regards to your friend,

- the Countess de Santos.
- What?

Oh, excuse me.
I forgot to introduce myself.

Inspector Maloo.

Ah, the famous Maloo.
What are you doing
on this island?

I'm making sure that they...
Oh, pardon.

I mean that no pretty girls
get murdered here.

Nice of you.

You and your girlfriend
are completely different,

but you do have
something in common...

Let us say, then,
that you joined up

to create a figure,
like Zorro or the Phantom.

It would be very difficult
to identify them.

We have something in common.

Oh, you have that.

I admit that's something
very important.

Take your size, your coloring,

the shape of your lips.
Very red lips.

Oh, I find that
very interesting.

Explain it to me
a little bit closer.

No, no, no.
No, I haven't got any time.

We'll come back to it later,

but don't forget,
Maloo is on your side.

Bye-bye.

And what about your girlfriend?
Won't she wake up?

Of course not.
Don't be afraid.

When she sleeps, she sleeps.

Are you sure?

But darling,
I want to be alone with you,

and if she should wake up
she's as nice as I am.

You'll see.

Come on, kiss me.
We've wasted
too much time already.

[car horn blares]
[gasps]

What's the matter?
Has your courage deserted you?

I'm sure she didn't
hear anything.

You don't even have to be
very quiet either.

You're just saying that.

Oh, she sleeps like a log.

Well, come on.

- Finally alone.
- Yes.

[groaning]

Well?

I'm ticklish!

[gasping, laughing]

No!

Enough?

Let's try Method H.

- You two...
- Yes?

Stop it! Stop it!

He will tell us everything.

You won't get a word out of me.

He loves martinis.

Youngster's earned his bottle.

For whom do you work?

I don't know...
[sputtering]

You can't think of anything,
sweetie?

For whom do you work?

- Answer!
- For Tiller!

Stop!

Now, come on, tell me.

Why does Tiller want
that sculpture again?

I don't know!
I-I-I...

I-I really don't know why.

Hmm?

He can't get enough.
He drinks just like a fish.

[Vittorio sputtering]

You still haven't
answered my question.

Why does he want the sculpture?

Stop it.

We are here...

[babbling]

Now come on over here...

Hello!
How is everybody?

Alcoholics are really horrible.

What now?

[sighs]

[babbling]

It looked like
he could take a lot.

It's always the same
with these muscle men.

Yes.
Hey, I've got an idea.

What is it?

How 'bout we...
[gasps]

- Nice job. It's broken.
- Yes.

[ominous music ♪]

Ugh! It's a girl!

It's horrible.
Yes.

Now I know why he had to
have that sculpture back.

She's got to disappear.
What are we going to do?

Where can we take her?
Ugh...

I don't know.

Best thing to do is leave her
in there and plaster her up

and deliver her.

- Huh?
- Two beautiful presents
for Tanner.

[snoring loudly]

♪

[moans loudly]
Can it!

Shut your mouth.

[snoring continues]

I love you, mama.

It's so nice that you're by me.

Mary? Mary?

Oh! Hey?

He's on the line.

Hello, Mr. Radeck.

Yes.
Make a proposal.

I would like to have
the other 25,000 very soon.

Lida Regnier is by me.

Yes, yes.
That's right.

I don't know if
you'd still like her.

No, no.
You can't talk with her.

Yes... That'll be fine.

- Tonight at nine.
- Okay.

[ominous music ♪]

Hello!
Well, how are you?

Countess, I brought this
for you.

Oh, what a surprise, Maloo.

Oh, the beautiful flower.

It doesn't matter.
There's a lot more
out in the garden.

Come on in.

Oh, no, no, no.
Actually, I didn't
want to bother.

- Hello.
- You know each other?

To what do we owe
the honor of this visit?

Uh, number one:
naturally I wanted to see you,

and wanted to ask you if you
knew a certain Vittorio Freda

and if you spent
your expensive alcohol on him.

Oh, Vittorio Freda?

Never heard of him.
Don't know what
you're talking about.

Uh-huh, uh-huh...

And then I wanted
to invite you both to dinner.

My friend has a date,
but I'd love to.

This is very unpleasant.

I'm very sorry
you can't join us.

Maybe it'll work out
some other time.
Postponed isn't cancelled.

Well, you see, I promised
my friend Tanner
that I'd bring you along,

and now I don't know
what I should tell him

because he's anxious
to meet you.

[ominous music ♪]

Mr. Radeck is awaiting you.

Thank you.

[man]
Please come closer.

Mr. Tiller,
what are you doing here?

You'll find out right away.

I've been invited.

Please call Mr. Radeck.

As you wish.
Let's call Mr. Radeck.

Naturally, we have both
waited an awfully long time...

for this moment.

♪

[gasps]

Radeck...

$25,000...
for one visit from you...

That isn't too much.

I think it's about time we
brought this farce to an end.

Lida Regnier was only a bait
to get you to come over here,
you know.

The murderer
gives the instructions
to find his victim.

I really admire you,
but you're dangerous.

Actually, too dangerous.

I feel it.

I must bring my work
to a quick end.

I wanted only you
from the beginning...

and now, I will accomplish
my masterpiece, finally...

with you.

♪

It began as I first saw you
in my apartment.

You fascinated me.

I've never been able
to rid myself of that feeling.

♪

And now I will paint you

just like I painted
all the girls before you.

Your death will make
my work everlasting.

No one will ever
find a trace of you!

No, Mr. Radeck!

You made one mistake!

Too many of my friends
know that I am here.

Sorry, but they can't help you.

Morpho!

[screaming]

[muffled screams]

Morpho... no further.

Bring her to me.

Now you know everything, and so
tonight we can only be happy.

Right?

Yes, but for that
we've got time later.

I really can't
tell you any more.

You see,
it could be very important.

Now come on.

[Maloo singing softly ♪]

But then you must promise me

that this will come to an end
with this story.

I don't want to hear any more.
All right.

The millionaire, Radeck,
gave us the job

to find Lida Regnier.

We have found her
and my girlfriend in cashing in
at this very moment.

$25,000.

And you have solved a big case.

[both speaking
foreign language]

I don't think
he understood you.

Maybe I speak a dialect.
Yes, it can happen.

What, Radeck has returned?
Since when?

What dip you mean "returned"?
He lives in Ankara.

Yes, I know.
He had his office.

But he has lived
on this island.
He has made his money here.

Lately, he went
to North Africa.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Well, say it finally.
What's the matter?

Tiller lived in North Africa
a long time.
Is that a coincidence?

- How long ago was that?
- Just about four years ago.

Four years ago?
That would be about right.

And your girlfriend
is now with him?

Yes, and we've got to
go there now!

- Come on.
- Yes!

- What's the rush?
- Oh...

I just wanted to arrest you,
Red Lips.

Inspector, I swear to you
everything is in order.

We know who the murderer is.

That's something I know too,
my friend.

His name's Klaus Tiller

and it won't take very much
longer and we'll have him.

And there's something else
I know too.

You have unhappily fallen
in love with this girl,

whom I shall now arrest.

Oh!

My God, Tanner,
we've got to go after her.

Let's go!
Hurry up!

The time has come.
Go now.

I don't need you anymore.

Let me stay with you this time.

As you wish.

A work without soul.
My next will be much better.

Morpho!

♪

Through the science of...

modern psychiatry

and the use
of psychothrope substances...

he became so,

and believe me, it wasn't easy.

It took me years to do it.

Believe me, he's a true friend,

and he made it possible...

to develop a new line of art.

The art of fright.

Everything I am,
I am through him.

Morpho?

She belongs to you, my friend.

♪

No! No!

[crying out]
[fabric tearing]

[gunshot]

[Morpho groaning]

[gunshot]

[gasps]

Everything's all right.

Come on, untie her!

- Did you understand?
- Yes, I...

Go on!
Make it snappy!

Turn around!

Thanks, love.

Now hurry up.
We've gotta get away from here
in a few minutes.

Oh, I almost forgot something.

Just a minute.

Hmm, where should I put it?

Very decorative.

[horn blares]

Come on.
Take a look around here.

Look at that.

You guys go over there.
Spread out.

Hmm?

"My dear Inspector Tanner,"

excuse the untidiness
in the house,

but it couldn't be done
any other way.

I, personally,
don't like to be painted.

"Thousand kisses,
your Red Lips."

[upbeat music ♪]

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