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1
00:00:01,250 --> 00:00:02,330
โ Previously
on "The Bold Type"...
2
00:00:02,330 --> 00:00:03,500
โ Wow.
โ I don't know.
3
00:00:03,500 --> 00:00:05,130
I mean, I miss my old ones.
4
00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:08,000
I got a double mastectomy
three months ago.
5
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:09,380
These don't feel like me.
6
00:00:09,380 --> 00:00:13,090
I don't feel like me, and Iโโ
I just really wish I did.
7
00:00:13,090 --> 00:00:15,260
โ I'm glad we got
stuck together today.
8
00:00:15,260 --> 00:00:17,260
โ He is my employee.
โ And you like him.
9
00:00:17,260 --> 00:00:20,180
โ How am I gonna do this job
and have a baby?
10
00:00:20,180 --> 00:00:22,730
โ I love you, and I'm here,
and we'll make it happen.
11
00:00:22,730 --> 00:00:25,600
โ So you two are back together?
โ We are working on it.
12
00:00:25,600 --> 00:00:29,270
โ "Miles Shaw."
Didn't you date him in college?
13
00:00:29,270 --> 00:00:33,280
โ Where were we?
โ Hmm.
14
00:00:33,280 --> 00:00:34,320
โ You got fired, Kat.
15
00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:35,450
Either you pay
the full mortgage,
16
00:00:35,450 --> 00:00:37,240
or we are gonna rent
this place out.
17
00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:38,530
โ Or you could just
move in with me.
18
00:00:38,530 --> 00:00:39,580
โ I might take you up on that.
19
00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:43,620
โ Since we're talking
about the apartment,
20
00:00:43,620 --> 00:00:45,210
there are some rules.
21
00:00:45,210 --> 00:00:48,170
Utilities are split evenly,
groceries are fair game,
22
00:00:48,170 --> 00:00:50,210
and if my door is shut,
knock, okay?
23
00:00:50,210 --> 00:00:53,340
โ Will do.
โ Reliable Buddy 2.0?
24
00:00:53,340 --> 00:00:54,800
โ Speaking of which,
25
00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:57,590
I used it for the first time
last night since my surgery.
26
00:00:57,590 --> 00:01:00,220
โ Wow.
โ Jane, that's awesome.
27
00:01:00,220 --> 00:01:03,390
โ Bet I know who sparked it.
โ Yeah, Scotty.
28
00:01:03,390 --> 00:01:05,770
โ No.
โ He reawakened that libido.
29
00:01:05,770 --> 00:01:07,520
โ Hmm, resurrected
your lady boner.
30
00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:12,280
โ No, not Scott, my employee.
โ Okay.
31
00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:16,150
โ I just have been feeling
more like myself lately.
32
00:01:16,150 --> 00:01:17,780
โ That's good.
โ How about you?
33
00:01:17,780 --> 00:01:19,120
How are you feeling,
34
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:21,240
since you're gonna be
leaving this place?
35
00:01:21,240 --> 00:01:24,830
โ Honestly pretty emotional,
you know?
36
00:01:24,830 --> 00:01:26,120
It's kind of weird.
37
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:29,130
I feel like my entire existence
is in this apartment.
38
00:01:29,130 --> 00:01:31,130
[bubble wrap pops]
39
00:01:31,130 --> 00:01:32,460
โ That was an accident.
40
00:01:32,460 --> 00:01:34,260
โ She's having a moment.
โ Let me have my moment.
41
00:01:36,510 --> 00:01:37,800
That couchโโ
42
00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:40,850
oh man, I bought that couch
after my first promotion.
43
00:01:40,850 --> 00:01:42,140
Named her Connie.
44
00:01:42,140 --> 00:01:43,220
And we binged
"The L Word" together
45
00:01:43,220 --> 00:01:45,640
when I was figuring out
my sexuality.
46
00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:48,150
And this table...
47
00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:50,310
Basically ran my campaign
right here.
48
00:01:50,310 --> 00:01:53,400
And now I'm storing all of it.
[sighs]
49
00:01:54,820 --> 00:01:56,700
[bubble wrap pops]
50
00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:59,110
Sutton, it's enough.
โ Can you stop?
51
00:01:59,110 --> 00:02:00,530
โ I just feel like
if we have bubble wrap,
52
00:02:00,530 --> 00:02:01,700
we should be using it.
53
00:02:01,700 --> 00:02:03,660
โ Okay, we are gonna use it
54
00:02:03,660 --> 00:02:06,790
'cause there's one more thing
we haven't wrapped.
55
00:02:06,790 --> 00:02:09,540
โ Ah, yes.
โ Hey, Kat?
56
00:02:09,540 --> 00:02:10,830
[giggles]
57
00:02:10,830 --> 00:02:11,840
[bubble wrap pops]
58
00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:12,840
โ [screams]
59
00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:17,130
[both laugh]
60
00:02:17,130 --> 00:02:18,800
[pop music]
61
00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:22,390
โ โช All the time,
they're right beside me โช
62
00:02:22,390 --> 00:02:25,020
โ Where's "The New Yorker"?
The one with the yellow cover?
63
00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:33,770
โ I don't know.
โ Oh, here it is.
64
00:02:33,770 --> 00:02:36,900
This article
by your college boyfriend,
65
00:02:36,900 --> 00:02:39,660
"In the Knick of Time,"
did you read it?
66
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:42,820
โ A little bit.
โ It's descriptive.
67
00:02:42,820 --> 00:02:47,660
โ Well, he's
a very talented writer.
68
00:02:47,660 --> 00:02:51,880
โ "The moment I saw her,
I fell in love all over again.
69
00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:55,210
"And when she smiled,
showing her vulnerability,
70
00:02:55,210 --> 00:02:58,470
I wanted to devour
all her pain."
71
00:03:01,550 --> 00:03:03,510
Was he writing about you?
72
00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:12,900
โ We were separated, Ian.
73
00:03:12,900 --> 00:03:15,320
And he's a writer.
74
00:03:17,900 --> 00:03:20,820
That's what writers do.
75
00:03:20,820 --> 00:03:23,910
โ And yet you keep it
in your nightstandโโwhy?
76
00:03:26,700 --> 00:03:30,290
โ IโโI actually
don't even know why.
77
00:03:30,290 --> 00:03:32,460
We should talk
about this later.
78
00:03:32,460 --> 00:03:34,670
โ Yeah, sure thing.
79
00:03:34,670 --> 00:03:37,710
[melancholy music]
80
00:03:37,710 --> 00:03:40,340
โช โช
81
00:03:40,340 --> 00:03:43,260
โ Sutton?
Babe, are you still here?
82
00:03:45,510 --> 00:03:46,680
Oh, good.
You haven't left yet.
83
00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:49,100
I got something for you.
Open it.
84
00:03:49,100 --> 00:03:51,270
โ Oh, okay.
85
00:03:55,310 --> 00:03:56,690
[gasps]
It's a baby book.
86
00:03:56,690 --> 00:03:58,150
โ Yeah.
87
00:03:58,150 --> 00:04:00,150
โ With baseballs.
88
00:04:00,150 --> 00:04:02,490
We're not gonna find out
the sex for a while, you know?
89
00:04:02,490 --> 00:04:05,780
โ I know, I know,
but boy, girl, nonbinaryโโ
90
00:04:05,780 --> 00:04:08,410
they will be required
to love the Yankees.
91
00:04:08,410 --> 00:04:10,250
โ Well, as long as I can
keep loving the Phillies.
92
00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:12,500
โ Okay.
[both laugh]
93
00:04:12,500 --> 00:04:14,580
โ Open it.
Look at the first page.
94
00:04:14,580 --> 00:04:16,500
We get to fill
that one out today.
95
00:04:16,500 --> 00:04:18,550
โ Oh.
"Baby's first ultrasound."
96
00:04:21,090 --> 00:04:22,380
I love it.
97
00:04:26,220 --> 00:04:27,970
[whispers]
Thank you.
98
00:04:27,970 --> 00:04:30,970
[funky music]
99
00:04:30,970 --> 00:04:32,930
โช โช
100
00:04:32,930 --> 00:04:34,100
[phone pings]
101
00:04:40,150 --> 00:04:44,030
โ Whoa, excuse me.
Excuse me, this is myโโ
102
00:04:44,030 --> 00:04:45,660
โ Goโโ
โ Sorry.
103
00:04:45,660 --> 00:04:47,700
Thank you, sorry.
104
00:04:47,700 --> 00:04:51,540
โ Yeah, no, it'sโโit's
a crowded elevator, so yeah.
105
00:04:51,540 --> 00:04:53,000
โ Yeah.
โ [clears throat]
106
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:59,000
So did you have a good weekend?
107
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:01,250
โ I did.
You?
108
00:05:01,250 --> 00:05:05,430
โ Yeah, it was mostly
uneventful, but...
109
00:05:05,430 --> 00:05:07,140
โ "Mostly"?
110
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:10,180
โ Yeah, well, IโโI did get
a few things working
111
00:05:10,180 --> 00:05:13,640
that weren't before, so...
112
00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:17,270
โ Well, that's good.
โ Yeah, it is.
113
00:05:22,820 --> 00:05:25,150
โ Can I leave some flyers
here with you?
114
00:05:25,150 --> 00:05:26,820
I know how many people
you see each day.
115
00:05:26,820 --> 00:05:28,700
I figure you can pass them on.
116
00:05:28,700 --> 00:05:31,280
โ Of course.
โ Here you go.
117
00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:33,410
โ Oh, a domestic
violence shelter.
118
00:05:33,410 --> 00:05:34,660
That's awesome.
โ It is.
119
00:05:34,660 --> 00:05:36,540
โ I thought you worked
in finance.
120
00:05:36,540 --> 00:05:38,080
โ I did, but I left
121
00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:40,040
after my sister was abused
by her husband.
122
00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:42,300
โ Oh, I'm really sorry.
123
00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:45,470
โ She's okay now
thanks to shelters like this.
124
00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:48,090
I just wanna make a difference,
you know?
125
00:05:48,090 --> 00:05:50,640
โ Yeah, actually IโโI do know.
126
00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:52,970
Hey, do you mind if I talk
to Darby about your work?
127
00:05:52,970 --> 00:05:55,100
Maybe promote the shelter?
โ Yeah, please.
128
00:05:55,100 --> 00:05:56,810
Every little bit helps.
That's great, yeah.
129
00:05:56,810 --> 00:05:58,810
โ Okay.
โ Thanks.
130
00:05:58,810 --> 00:06:01,650
โ Yeah, of course.
131
00:06:01,650 --> 00:06:04,320
โ This too.
Thank you so much.
132
00:06:08,200 --> 00:06:10,740
โ [sighs]
โ Oh, hey, Georgia.
133
00:06:10,740 --> 00:06:12,080
Everything go well
with the shoot?
134
00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:13,830
โ Yeah, everything was great.
โ You sure?
135
00:06:13,830 --> 00:06:16,000
โ It wasn't the shoot.
136
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:18,290
The stylist I hired
for my son's graduation
137
00:06:18,290 --> 00:06:20,380
just ditched me
for a spread in "Vogue."
138
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,630
โ Oh, no.
โ Yeah.
139
00:06:22,630 --> 00:06:24,170
Do you freelance?
โ Yeah.
140
00:06:24,170 --> 00:06:26,590
As long as it doesn't interfere
with this, it's no problem.
141
00:06:26,590 --> 00:06:28,340
โ Great, because
it's in two days,
142
00:06:28,340 --> 00:06:29,680
and my son needs
some help as well.
143
00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,970
โ Well, let's up
your fashion game and his.
144
00:06:31,970 --> 00:06:35,060
I already have your sizes,
so I can start pulling.
145
00:06:35,060 --> 00:06:37,640
How about your son?
โ Size four.
146
00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:39,850
[chuckles]
He's a rising first grader.
147
00:06:39,850 --> 00:06:42,730
โ Oh, it's
a kindergarten graduation.
148
00:06:42,730 --> 00:06:44,610
โ I'll text you my address.
We can meet after work.
149
00:06:44,610 --> 00:06:46,530
โ That sounds perfect.
โ Great, isn't it?
150
00:06:46,530 --> 00:06:48,820
โ It's so great.
151
00:06:48,820 --> 00:06:51,820
[upbeat music]
152
00:06:51,820 --> 00:06:54,530
โช โช
153
00:06:54,530 --> 00:06:56,490
โ Here you go.
โ Oh, thanks, Kat.
154
00:06:56,490 --> 00:06:58,750
โ Yeah.
155
00:06:58,750 --> 00:07:00,830
You know Penny Davenport?
โ Mmโhmm.
156
00:07:00,830 --> 00:07:03,750
โ She runs a domestic violence
shelter, and I think
157
00:07:03,750 --> 00:07:06,340
she'd be a great person
to speak at one of our events.
158
00:07:06,340 --> 00:07:07,920
โ That's a good idea.
โ Thank you.
159
00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:09,840
โ I've got to run to a meeting.
Thanks, Kat.
160
00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:12,390
โ Yeah, also...
161
00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:14,350
I feel like we should
be livestreaming
162
00:07:14,350 --> 00:07:15,470
these speaking events
163
00:07:15,470 --> 00:07:17,220
and posting them
to "The Belle" website.
164
00:07:17,220 --> 00:07:19,520
That way, we're reaching
thousands of women
165
00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:21,020
instead of just
the people that are here.
166
00:07:21,020 --> 00:07:22,060
โ Mmโhmm.
167
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:24,150
โ I mean, you could even do,
168
00:07:24,150 --> 00:07:26,610
like, a more intimate
interview series,
169
00:07:26,610 --> 00:07:29,820
like aโโwell,
like a podcast, maybe.
170
00:07:29,820 --> 00:07:33,110
Women here talk to me all
the time when I'm just working,
171
00:07:33,110 --> 00:07:36,080
and they have super
interesting stories and ideas.
172
00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:39,500
And it could be
a casual interview
173
00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:40,540
from across the bar.
174
00:07:40,540 --> 00:07:41,710
โ With you.
175
00:07:41,710 --> 00:07:44,630
โ Yeah.
โ Okay.
176
00:07:44,630 --> 00:07:47,380
What makes you think you're
the right person to do this?
177
00:07:47,380 --> 00:07:49,800
โ Well, I mean, I used to run
social media at "Scarlet,"
178
00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:54,340
which was basically curating
content for women by women.
179
00:07:54,340 --> 00:07:57,010
It's what I doโโor did.
180
00:07:59,020 --> 00:08:01,230
โ How about you record
one episode?
181
00:08:01,230 --> 00:08:02,850
And if I don't like it, thenโโ
182
00:08:02,850 --> 00:08:05,310
โ Then, I mean,
I won't bring it up again.
183
00:08:05,310 --> 00:08:07,070
Promise.
โ Okay.
184
00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:12,030
โ Thank you.
185
00:08:13,990 --> 00:08:16,240
โ [gasps]
A podcast?
186
00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:18,160
Oh, my gosh.
That's awesome.
187
00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:20,040
โ Yeah, I mean, it's
an oversaturated market,
188
00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:21,450
and I don't really know
what I'm doing,
189
00:08:21,450 --> 00:08:23,250
but my parents are shrinks,
and I feel like
190
00:08:23,250 --> 00:08:25,500
shrinking people is kind
of like interviewing people.
191
00:08:25,500 --> 00:08:28,290
โ Kat, you were made
for this job.
192
00:08:28,290 --> 00:08:30,920
Ooh, you could call it
"Kat's Got Your Tongue"
193
00:08:30,920 --> 00:08:33,720
or "Katโaclysm."
194
00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:35,260
โ Or something without a pun?
195
00:08:35,260 --> 00:08:36,720
โ You could ask Alex
for advice.
196
00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:38,890
Get it?
"Ask Alex"?
197
00:08:38,890 --> 00:08:40,060
โ That's actually
a pretty good idea.
198
00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:44,230
What's going on with Jane?
199
00:08:44,230 --> 00:08:48,110
โ I think that her sex drive
is getting in the way of work,
200
00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:52,570
or, should I say, her ability
to work with Scotty Too Hotty.
201
00:08:52,570 --> 00:08:56,570
โ Wowie, so we are finally
admitting there's a problem.
202
00:08:56,570 --> 00:08:58,830
โ Okay, fine.
There is a problem.
203
00:08:58,830 --> 00:09:01,870
โ Hmm, I have one word
for you, JaneโโRaya.
204
00:09:01,870 --> 00:09:03,080
โ Yeah!
205
00:09:03,080 --> 00:09:04,410
โ I could have a suitable fix
for you
206
00:09:04,410 --> 00:09:05,580
in, like, less than an hour.
207
00:09:05,580 --> 00:09:08,130
โ No, I can't.
Dating, I just...
208
00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:11,090
Dating is gonna make me think
about Ryan,
209
00:09:11,090 --> 00:09:14,300
and I'mโโI'm not ready
to do that.
210
00:09:14,300 --> 00:09:15,720
โ Okay, well, look,
211
00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:17,840
it does kind of sound
like your body is ready.
212
00:09:17,840 --> 00:09:20,010
And that's very different
from dating, so
213
00:09:20,010 --> 00:09:23,060
unless you wanna accidentally
hook up with your employee...
214
00:09:23,060 --> 00:09:27,520
โ Okay, okay, fine.
I will Raya.
215
00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:28,610
โ [gasps]
216
00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:31,610
[pop music]
217
00:09:31,610 --> 00:09:33,110
โช โช
218
00:09:33,110 --> 00:09:34,110
Hi.
โ Hey.
219
00:09:34,110 --> 00:09:36,610
โ Hey, Doctor.
โ How are you?
220
00:09:36,610 --> 00:09:38,070
โ Good.
โ Great.
221
00:09:38,070 --> 00:09:41,160
โ It says here
that this is your first baby.
222
00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:43,120
โ Yes.
โ Wow, congratulations.
223
00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:45,080
โ Thank you.
โ All right.
224
00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:47,960
I'll have you lie back,
and just tuck up your shirt,
225
00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:49,040
tuck down your pants.
226
00:09:49,040 --> 00:09:51,750
โ Sure.
227
00:09:51,750 --> 00:09:55,220
โ I apologize in advance.
Our gel warmer is on the fritz,
228
00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:57,550
so this is gonna be
a little bit cold.
229
00:09:57,550 --> 00:09:59,760
โ Okay.
โ All right.
230
00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:04,020
โ Ooh, that is cold.
[both laugh]
231
00:10:11,730 --> 00:10:13,110
โ How does everything look?
232
00:10:13,110 --> 00:10:16,950
โ Is the machine
on the fritz too?
233
00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,990
โ I'm gonna have you
sit up again, please.
234
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,630
There's no heartbeat.
235
00:10:31,630 --> 00:10:33,130
I'm so sorry.
236
00:10:33,130 --> 00:10:35,800
[solemn music]
237
00:10:40,260 --> 00:10:45,100
โ Statistically, 10% of
pregnancies end in miscarriage.
238
00:10:45,100 --> 00:10:46,810
It's not your fault.
239
00:10:46,810 --> 00:10:48,310
And just because
it's happened once
240
00:10:48,310 --> 00:10:50,190
doesn't mean it's
gonna happen again.
241
00:10:50,190 --> 00:10:53,310
โ โช Stuck here
in the inโbetween โช
242
00:10:53,310 --> 00:10:56,190
โช โช
243
00:10:56,190 --> 00:10:59,320
โ Okay, so what now?
244
00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:01,160
โ So now you two wait.
245
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:04,240
It should take
up to about 48 hours or so.
246
00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:05,660
Because it's early
in the pregnancy,
247
00:11:05,660 --> 00:11:07,660
it's gonna feel
like heavy cramping
248
00:11:07,660 --> 00:11:09,250
followed by a heavy period.
249
00:11:09,250 --> 00:11:13,170
In fact, you probably want
to use these pads.
250
00:11:13,170 --> 00:11:15,670
โ โช Break down here โช
251
00:11:15,670 --> 00:11:18,720
โช โช
252
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,300
โ I'm sorry.
253
00:11:20,300 --> 00:11:21,930
I'm gonna give you two
a minute, okay?
254
00:11:21,930 --> 00:11:25,350
โ โช Whoa, oh, whoa, oh โช
255
00:11:25,350 --> 00:11:28,020
โช โช
256
00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:31,310
โช Breathe โช
257
00:11:31,310 --> 00:11:36,190
โช Still, I have
to tell myself to breathe โช
258
00:11:36,190 --> 00:11:38,150
โ I just need Darby
to like one episode.
259
00:11:38,150 --> 00:11:40,700
โ I saw you rise all the way
to the top of "Scarlet."
260
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,030
You don't do anything
halfโassed,
261
00:11:42,030 --> 00:11:43,820
and this podcast
is gonna be no exception.
262
00:11:43,820 --> 00:11:45,870
โ Well, thanks.
I appreciate it.
263
00:11:45,870 --> 00:11:48,240
JustโโI'm trying to find
some direction, you know?
264
00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:50,290
I mean, this podcast feels
like the right step, so...
265
00:11:50,290 --> 00:11:52,040
โ Okay, mics.
266
00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:56,210
If I were you, I would go
with ProFrequency.
267
00:11:56,210 --> 00:12:00,760
It's got a little less
sensitive condenser mic,
268
00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:02,930
but better
for a busy environment.
269
00:12:02,930 --> 00:12:04,930
โ Like a bar.
โ Exactly.
270
00:12:04,930 --> 00:12:06,800
โ Okay.
All right, so...
271
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:07,890
โ Hey.
โ Thank you.
272
00:12:07,890 --> 00:12:09,100
โ You're welcome.
โ Oh.
273
00:12:09,100 --> 00:12:11,230
โ I'm trying
to start a podcast.
274
00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:13,850
โ Oh, congratulations.
โ Thank you.
275
00:12:13,850 --> 00:12:15,190
[lowers voice]
Hello,
276
00:12:15,190 --> 00:12:17,900
and welcome to "The Belle
Podcast" with Kat Edison.
277
00:12:17,900 --> 00:12:21,320
โ [vocalizes]
โ Our first guest isโโ
278
00:12:21,320 --> 00:12:24,820
โ Uh...your card's
been declined.
279
00:12:24,820 --> 00:12:26,820
โ Oh, really?
โ Yeah.
280
00:12:26,820 --> 00:12:29,120
โ It's probably
a mistake, so...
281
00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:30,790
[phone buzzes]
282
00:12:30,790 --> 00:12:35,080
Um, I probably
just forgot to...
283
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,210
โ Do youโโ
I can just grab it for you.
284
00:12:36,210 --> 00:12:37,920
โ No, no, no, no.
285
00:12:37,920 --> 00:12:40,210
โ I'll hold onto these.
286
00:12:49,100 --> 00:12:51,100
โ Hey, you want
some chamomile?
287
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,190
I could order some food.
288
00:12:57,190 --> 00:12:59,150
Watch a movie,
stay in together.
289
00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:05,070
Chicken soup?
290
00:13:05,070 --> 00:13:06,240
Not that you're sick,
291
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:09,780
but I just thought that
comfort food might help you.
292
00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:16,830
Hey.
293
00:13:16,830 --> 00:13:19,460
You haven't said anything since
we left the doctor's office.
294
00:13:19,460 --> 00:13:23,210
How are you feeling?
295
00:13:23,210 --> 00:13:25,260
โ Like you said,
I'm not sick, you know?
296
00:13:25,260 --> 00:13:29,260
And I feel fine, so...
297
00:13:29,260 --> 00:13:32,180
I was supposed to meet
Kat and Jane at The Belle.
298
00:13:32,180 --> 00:13:36,810
Maybe I'llโโI'll do that.
โ Are you sure?
299
00:13:36,810 --> 00:13:39,110
โ Yeah, I can't sit here
for 48 hours.
300
00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:42,280
โ Well, it could be less.
โ If it is, I'll come home.
301
00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:45,400
โ Okay, I was gonna
cancel the meeting I had,
302
00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:48,530
but since you're gonna see
the girls, I'll keep it.
303
00:13:48,530 --> 00:13:51,200
But if you need meโโ
โ I'll call you.
304
00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:52,240
โ Yeah.
305
00:13:54,910 --> 00:13:56,410
โ I love you.
โ I love you.
306
00:13:56,410 --> 00:13:59,420
[melancholic music]
307
00:13:59,420 --> 00:14:06,220
โช โช
308
00:14:08,010 --> 00:14:11,220
โ The doctor said
it could happen anytime
309
00:14:11,220 --> 00:14:12,470
in the next two days.
310
00:14:12,470 --> 00:14:16,980
โ Sutton.
โ We're so sorry.
311
00:14:16,980 --> 00:14:18,520
โ I'm fine.
312
00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:23,110
Andโโand Richardโโhe's
being amazing as always, so...
313
00:14:23,110 --> 00:14:24,320
I'm gonna go home
and rest after this.
314
00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:27,860
I just wanted you guys to know,
and now you do, so...
315
00:14:27,860 --> 00:14:30,110
[phone buzzes]
316
00:14:30,110 --> 00:14:31,320
Oh, shit.
317
00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:32,990
I forgot
about this styling job I took.
318
00:14:32,990 --> 00:14:36,290
I'm supposed to pull clothes
after work.
319
00:14:36,290 --> 00:14:38,830
โ I thought you said you were
gonna go home after this.
320
00:14:38,830 --> 00:14:40,290
โ Maybe you should rest.
321
00:14:40,290 --> 00:14:43,210
โ Oh, yeah, I'mโโI'm gonna
call Timothy when I leave
322
00:14:43,210 --> 00:14:46,260
and see if he wants a side gig.
323
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:48,550
No work.
I promise.
324
00:14:48,550 --> 00:14:52,180
So who's gonna be keeping me
posted on this double date?
325
00:14:52,180 --> 00:14:53,510
I'm gonna need
the playโbyโplay.
326
00:14:53,510 --> 00:14:55,220
โ I'll document it.
327
00:14:55,220 --> 00:14:57,430
Oh, I'm gonna live tweet
the whole thing.
328
00:14:57,430 --> 00:15:00,480
โ โช Ooh, dress cleaner
that a Sunday โช
329
00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:02,150
โช I'm goody good
like gelato โช
330
00:15:02,150 --> 00:15:05,320
โ But it is way too scary,
so I will not watch it again.
331
00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:06,530
โ Oh, wow.
โ Yeah.
332
00:15:06,530 --> 00:15:08,240
[both laugh]
333
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:11,160
โ Favorite book of last year?
โ Oh, okay.
334
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:14,240
"Trick Mirror."
You know it?
335
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:16,290
โ Yeah, I couldn't put it down.
336
00:15:16,290 --> 00:15:18,330
Of course, I was on a cruise
with my parents,
337
00:15:18,330 --> 00:15:20,250
so it could've been
an avoidance tactic.
338
00:15:20,250 --> 00:15:22,130
Yeah, yeah.
โ No.
339
00:15:22,130 --> 00:15:25,210
โ A dark and stormy for Kevin,
and a vodka soda for Jane.
340
00:15:25,210 --> 00:15:26,460
โ Thank you.
341
00:15:26,460 --> 00:15:29,220
You know, you don't have
to bartend here, right?
342
00:15:29,220 --> 00:15:30,590
โ Oh, yeah, I know.
343
00:15:30,590 --> 00:15:33,090
Just wanna make sure
you have everything you need.
344
00:15:33,090 --> 00:15:36,350
โ Hmm, good friend.
โ She's the best.
345
00:15:36,350 --> 00:15:39,060
Are you guys gonna join us?
โ Yeah.
346
00:15:39,060 --> 00:15:40,520
We're just waiting
on our drinks,
347
00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:42,190
but we'll be over in a minute.
348
00:15:42,190 --> 00:15:44,230
โ Okay.
โ Okay, hmm.
349
00:15:47,570 --> 00:15:51,360
โ So you have a Vertical,
which means you're an editor?
350
00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:54,530
โ And apparently it also means
I have clingy friends.
351
00:15:54,530 --> 00:15:56,240
โ Yeah?
โ [laughs]
352
00:15:59,410 --> 00:16:02,290
โช โช
353
00:16:02,290 --> 00:16:04,080
โ โช Hitting on the edges โช
354
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:05,500
โ Sorry, but...
355
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:07,170
โ Should we start
with your son?
356
00:16:07,170 --> 00:16:09,170
โ He is the man of the hour,
so why not?
357
00:16:09,170 --> 00:16:11,300
โ I had so much fun
shopping for him today.
358
00:16:11,300 --> 00:16:15,260
So I was thinking we could do,
like, a fatherโson thing.
359
00:16:15,260 --> 00:16:17,260
Play in that same
color palette.
360
00:16:17,260 --> 00:16:19,270
โ So cute.
Yeah.
361
00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:20,430
Oh, my husband has
a suit like this.
362
00:16:20,430 --> 00:16:24,190
I'm sure he'd love that.
โ Great.
363
00:16:24,190 --> 00:16:26,110
โ Aww.
364
00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:30,610
โ So...so did you
always want kids?
365
00:16:30,610 --> 00:16:34,320
โ I did, but that didn't
make it any easier.
366
00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:37,370
Three rounds of IUI,
two of IVF.
367
00:16:37,370 --> 00:16:40,200
Almost started thinking
it wasn't gonna happen for us.
368
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:43,210
โ But it did.
369
00:16:43,210 --> 00:16:45,420
How was your pregnancy?
370
00:16:45,420 --> 00:16:47,210
โ Morning sickness
the first trimester,
371
00:16:47,210 --> 00:16:49,340
bed rest at the end.
372
00:16:49,340 --> 00:16:51,010
You know, but it was
all worth it
373
00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:53,720
when I held my son
for the first time.
374
00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:57,180
Ah, I see you're married.
Are you planning to have kids?
375
00:16:57,180 --> 00:16:59,060
โ Um...
376
00:16:59,060 --> 00:17:00,430
My husband and I
just got married,
377
00:17:00,430 --> 00:17:04,190
so we're taking it slow.
378
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:05,440
โ What do you
think of bow ties?
379
00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:07,100
โ Ah, yes.
380
00:17:07,100 --> 00:17:10,150
Um...
381
00:17:10,150 --> 00:17:13,110
โ Oh.
โ [chuckles]
382
00:17:13,110 --> 00:17:15,490
Right?
383
00:17:15,490 --> 00:17:17,700
โ That would look great.
384
00:17:17,700 --> 00:17:19,120
โช โช
385
00:17:19,120 --> 00:17:20,280
โ โช Dirty, dirty secret โช
386
00:17:20,280 --> 00:17:25,160
โช Our pretty lie โช
387
00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:27,170
โช Oh, oh, oh, oh โช
388
00:17:27,170 --> 00:17:32,260
โช Without disguise โช
389
00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:34,380
โช Oh, oh, oh, oh โช
390
00:17:34,380 --> 00:17:38,180
โช And I've got a taste
of danger, getting off โช
391
00:17:38,180 --> 00:17:42,180
โ Your place is really nice.
โ Yeah, okay.
392
00:17:42,180 --> 00:17:45,560
โ โช Pretty lies โช
393
00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:47,520
โช Dirty little secret โช
394
00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:51,190
โช Oh, oh,
dirty little secret โช
395
00:17:51,190 --> 00:17:53,230
โ [sighs, stammers]
396
00:17:53,230 --> 00:17:54,440
Wait.
โ What?
397
00:17:54,440 --> 00:17:56,450
โ I'm sorry.
โ What?
398
00:17:56,450 --> 00:17:58,740
Is everything okay?
โ Yeah, sorry.
399
00:17:58,740 --> 00:18:01,830
It's not you.
I just...
400
00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:06,500
IโโI think I need
to take things slow.
401
00:18:06,500 --> 00:18:10,130
โ Of course.
Whatever you need.
402
00:18:10,130 --> 00:18:11,750
โ Um...
403
00:18:11,750 --> 00:18:14,630
Maybe we should do this
another night.
404
00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:19,550
โ No worriesโโI'll call you.
โ Yeah.
405
00:18:19,550 --> 00:18:20,760
Great.
Yeah.
406
00:18:23,310 --> 00:18:26,140
It's justโโit's over there.
โ Yeah.
407
00:18:26,140 --> 00:18:29,150
[solemn music]
408
00:18:29,150 --> 00:18:34,780
โช โช
409
00:18:39,410 --> 00:18:42,410
["Easy" by Alison Wonderland
playing]
410
00:18:42,410 --> 00:18:44,700
โช โช
411
00:18:44,700 --> 00:18:48,790
โ โช Time feels slower
inside of my head โช
412
00:18:48,790 --> 00:18:50,630
โช โช
413
00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:53,290
โช Can I paint a picture โช
414
00:18:53,290 --> 00:18:57,300
โช Of the world
that I see instead? โช
415
00:18:57,300 --> 00:18:59,880
โช And I know it's โช
416
00:18:59,880 --> 00:19:03,390
โช They say
I'm not really that bad โช
417
00:19:03,390 --> 00:19:05,390
โช โช
418
00:19:05,390 --> 00:19:07,600
โช But I think too much โช
419
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,310
โ Hey.
โ Hey.
420
00:19:10,310 --> 00:19:12,610
[both laugh]
421
00:19:14,820 --> 00:19:17,650
โ Feels weird to be
back at Safford.
422
00:19:17,650 --> 00:19:20,780
โ Yeah, I mean, I figured this
would be a lot less...
423
00:19:20,780 --> 00:19:23,820
โ Out in the open?
โ Exactly.
424
00:19:23,820 --> 00:19:27,160
โ Yeah.
โ So I wanna help you.
425
00:19:29,710 --> 00:19:30,790
โ Whoa.
426
00:19:30,790 --> 00:19:32,460
โ Turns out "Scarlet"
has a bunch
427
00:19:32,460 --> 00:19:35,420
of extra podcast mics
just laying around.
428
00:19:35,420 --> 00:19:37,250
โ Huh.
โ Hmm.
429
00:19:37,250 --> 00:19:38,590
โ You want me to steal
"Scarlet" property?
430
00:19:38,590 --> 00:19:40,880
โ More like borrow it.
โ Right.
431
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:42,300
โ You know, I loan you
my mixer.
432
00:19:42,300 --> 00:19:44,300
As long as you drop it to me
early in the morning,
433
00:19:44,300 --> 00:19:46,260
no one will be none the wiser,
you know?
434
00:19:46,260 --> 00:19:47,770
โ Alex, I appreciate it,
435
00:19:47,770 --> 00:19:52,600
but I'm not gonna get you fired
so I can record a podcast.
436
00:19:52,600 --> 00:19:54,230
But thanks.
437
00:19:54,230 --> 00:19:57,650
โ You're sure?
โ Yeah.
438
00:19:57,650 --> 00:19:58,860
โ Okay.
439
00:20:02,410 --> 00:20:06,330
So then, what are you gonna do?
440
00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:08,830
โ Well, my paycheck
hasn't cleared yet,
441
00:20:08,830 --> 00:20:10,660
and I accidentallyโโ
442
00:20:10,660 --> 00:20:13,250
I paid three months
of storage space up front,
443
00:20:13,250 --> 00:20:14,750
which is why
my account overdrafted,
444
00:20:14,750 --> 00:20:17,630
but I'm gonna have some cash
in a couple days.
445
00:20:17,630 --> 00:20:20,760
And IโโI mean, most of that
is gonna go to rent,
446
00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:22,840
and my phone bill,
and overdraft fees,
447
00:20:22,840 --> 00:20:24,640
but it's all good.
448
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:26,800
โ How much was
the storage space?
449
00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:28,640
โ $300 a month.
450
00:20:28,640 --> 00:20:31,640
โ 300โโwow, that's
a huge monthly expense
451
00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:34,060
on a bartender's salary.
452
00:20:34,060 --> 00:20:36,440
Can you cancel it?
453
00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:38,610
โ Well, where would
I put my stuff?
454
00:20:38,610 --> 00:20:42,820
โ Well, you can sell it.
โ I can't do that.
455
00:20:42,820 --> 00:20:46,410
I already lost "Scarlet,"
and my apartment,
456
00:20:46,410 --> 00:20:49,910
and my 401(k), and...
457
00:20:49,910 --> 00:20:52,870
[somber music]
458
00:20:52,870 --> 00:20:56,750
The only thing
I do know is that
459
00:20:56,750 --> 00:20:58,000
I can't lose anything else,
460
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:01,380
so selling my stuff is
just not an option.
461
00:21:01,380 --> 00:21:04,130
โช โช
462
00:21:04,130 --> 00:21:07,140
[funky music]
463
00:21:07,140 --> 00:21:08,300
โช โช
464
00:21:08,300 --> 00:21:09,680
โ Everything was great.
465
00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:15,230
I mean, he was sweet,
and cute, and...
466
00:21:15,230 --> 00:21:16,770
[sighs]
I don't know.
467
00:21:16,770 --> 00:21:19,270
We just started hooking up,
and I...
468
00:21:19,270 --> 00:21:21,280
I couldn't go through with it.
469
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:22,820
โ Well, I think it makes sense.
470
00:21:22,820 --> 00:21:25,450
You haven't been with anyone
since Ryan, and change is hard.
471
00:21:25,450 --> 00:21:26,700
I get it.
472
00:21:26,700 --> 00:21:28,910
Just think of this guy
as a warmโup, you know?
473
00:21:28,910 --> 00:21:32,620
There are plenty more on Raya.
I could get right on it.
474
00:21:32,620 --> 00:21:34,080
Just say the word.
475
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:36,870
โ Yeah, can we just
focus on Sutton?
476
00:21:36,870 --> 00:21:38,460
โ Yeah.
477
00:21:38,460 --> 00:21:40,590
โ I can't imagine having
to wait this long.
478
00:21:40,590 --> 00:21:42,880
โ I know, but at least
we're here to cheer her up.
479
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:44,340
โ Yeah.
โ Hey.
480
00:21:44,340 --> 00:21:45,840
What are you guys doing here?
481
00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:49,220
โ We brought coffee and bagels.
โ Oh.
482
00:21:49,220 --> 00:21:53,140
โ Yeah.
Shouldn't you be in bed?
483
00:21:53,140 --> 00:21:56,310
โ Did it already happen?
โ No, it didn't.
484
00:21:56,310 --> 00:21:58,230
No.
both: Oh.
485
00:21:58,230 --> 00:22:00,310
โ What's with the clothes?
486
00:22:00,310 --> 00:22:04,780
โ Oh, I went shopping.
โ Huh, retail therapy.
487
00:22:04,780 --> 00:22:06,030
โ Kind of, except
it wasn't for me.
488
00:22:06,030 --> 00:22:07,700
It was for Georgia and her son.
489
00:22:07,700 --> 00:22:10,240
โ But I thought that you were
gonna have Timothy do that
490
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:11,950
so you could go home and rest.
491
00:22:11,950 --> 00:22:13,620
โ You know, I was going to,
and then I was like,
492
00:22:13,620 --> 00:22:16,870
"Wait a minute.
Tuxedos for fiveโyearโold boys?
493
00:22:16,870 --> 00:22:18,000
How could I not?"
494
00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:20,500
So I'm on my way
to meet the little guy now.
495
00:22:20,500 --> 00:22:21,840
I should probably get going.
496
00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:22,960
โ Hold on.
โ Hey.
497
00:22:25,090 --> 00:22:28,050
Are you okay?
โ Yeah.
498
00:22:28,050 --> 00:22:30,180
I mean, you know,
this pad's a little thick,
499
00:22:30,180 --> 00:22:31,720
but other than that, I'm fine.
500
00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:36,770
โ Okay, 'cause I mean,
you're gonna go style a kid
501
00:22:36,770 --> 00:22:38,440
while you're waiting
to miscarry.
502
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:43,020
It's just...
โ Yeah.
503
00:22:43,020 --> 00:22:44,480
That's crazy.
โ No.
504
00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:46,780
โ No, I know it's crazy.
It is.
505
00:22:46,780 --> 00:22:49,490
But I have to do it because...
506
00:22:49,490 --> 00:22:52,070
Because I don't feel anything.
507
00:22:52,070 --> 00:22:53,450
โ What do you mean?
508
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:56,450
โ I just keep waiting
509
00:22:56,450 --> 00:22:58,330
for this tidal wave of emotions
to hit me,
510
00:22:58,330 --> 00:23:04,000
and I'm not angry, or mad,
or sad, or any of the things
511
00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:05,840
that you're supposed to be
about a miscarriage.
512
00:23:05,840 --> 00:23:09,300
I justโโI feel numb, and
I really don't wanna feel numb,
513
00:23:09,300 --> 00:23:12,260
so I'm gonna go dress
this little boy,
514
00:23:12,260 --> 00:23:15,510
and then, you know,
maybe then...
515
00:23:15,510 --> 00:23:17,180
โ You'll feel something.
516
00:23:17,180 --> 00:23:20,230
[tense music]
517
00:23:20,230 --> 00:23:24,440
โช โช
518
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:26,730
โ So you wanna know
why I keep the magazine?
519
00:23:26,730 --> 00:23:28,440
โ Yes, I do.
520
00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:33,370
โ I like to read the story.
โ Why?
521
00:23:33,370 --> 00:23:36,580
โ Because it's romantic.
โ It's romantic?
522
00:23:36,580 --> 00:23:38,750
It's an account
of you two having sex.
523
00:23:38,750 --> 00:23:42,290
โ It's an account
of how a man sees a woman.
524
00:23:42,290 --> 00:23:44,460
โ Oh, Jacqueline,
are you serious?
525
00:23:44,460 --> 00:23:49,380
โ Look, we are working hard
in therapy and at home
526
00:23:49,380 --> 00:23:50,970
to try to communicate better.
527
00:23:50,970 --> 00:23:54,720
And this is me telling you
why I kept the article.
528
00:24:00,390 --> 00:24:05,400
I felt seen.
529
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:08,440
[eerie music]
530
00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:11,280
โช โช
531
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:14,280
[hipโhop music]
532
00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:15,780
โช โช
533
00:24:15,780 --> 00:24:18,120
โ Hey, I'm so glad you called.
534
00:24:18,120 --> 00:24:19,580
I really appreciate
your donations.
535
00:24:19,580 --> 00:24:22,540
โ Yeah.
โ Wow, this is fantastic.
536
00:24:22,540 --> 00:24:24,290
โ Yeah, the first one helped me
537
00:24:24,290 --> 00:24:26,540
through a really difficult
board room presentation.
538
00:24:26,540 --> 00:24:30,300
I was actually wearing this
when I got my first promotion.
539
00:24:30,300 --> 00:24:33,720
โ Actually, this would be
perfect for Thelma.
540
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:35,680
Yeah, she's just been with us
for about three weeks,
541
00:24:35,680 --> 00:24:37,760
and she just got her first
interview as a receptionist.
542
00:24:37,760 --> 00:24:39,390
โ That's awesome.
โ Yeah.
543
00:24:39,390 --> 00:24:40,680
โ Would you let me know
how it goes?
544
00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:43,690
โ Yes, definitely.
Thank you, Kat.
545
00:24:43,690 --> 00:24:46,230
โ It's nothing.
โ No.
546
00:24:46,230 --> 00:24:48,900
You're helping to make a woman
who is reinventing her life
547
00:24:48,900 --> 00:24:51,440
and herself
feel confident again.
548
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:54,820
That's not nothing, Kat.
It's actually everything.
549
00:24:56,530 --> 00:24:58,120
Thanks for this.
โ Yeah.
550
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:12,970
Hey, Alex, can you meet me
at my place after work?
551
00:25:12,970 --> 00:25:14,170
I need your help
with something.
552
00:25:19,180 --> 00:25:22,180
[funky music]
553
00:25:22,180 --> 00:25:27,020
โช โช
554
00:25:27,020 --> 00:25:29,480
โ Hey, I'm gonna need
another hour on this,
555
00:25:29,480 --> 00:25:31,230
but the story's really good.
556
00:25:31,230 --> 00:25:34,860
โ Great, yeah.
Take whatever time you need.
557
00:25:34,860 --> 00:25:37,660
โ You okay?
โ Yeah, I'm fine.
558
00:25:41,790 --> 00:25:44,960
Um...it'sโโit's complicated.
559
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:46,080
โ Try me.
560
00:25:50,290 --> 00:25:51,750
โ Okay.
561
00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:58,800
Well, you know how I told you
that my mom died?
562
00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:00,300
It was from breast cancer.
563
00:26:00,300 --> 00:26:04,810
She had the BRCA1 mutation,
and so do I.
564
00:26:04,810 --> 00:26:08,940
โ I read your pieces about it.
โ Yeah.
565
00:26:08,940 --> 00:26:11,150
But what I haven't
written about yet is
566
00:26:11,150 --> 00:26:12,650
that a couple months ago,
567
00:26:12,650 --> 00:26:15,610
I got a preventative
double mastectomy.
568
00:26:19,110 --> 00:26:21,030
[sighs]
569
00:26:21,030 --> 00:26:23,990
I'm really happy
that I had the surgery.
570
00:26:23,990 --> 00:26:26,120
I just thought
that once it was done,
571
00:26:26,120 --> 00:26:30,710
I would feel like myself again,
572
00:26:30,710 --> 00:26:33,630
and I don't.
573
00:26:33,630 --> 00:26:35,550
And my friends
have been amazing,
574
00:26:35,550 --> 00:26:39,640
but they have their own
problems to worry about.
575
00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:43,260
So I guess sometimes,
I just feel alone.
576
00:26:43,260 --> 00:26:48,190
โ When my dad died,
I felt the same way,
577
00:26:48,190 --> 00:26:53,820
so I joined
a grief support group.
578
00:26:53,820 --> 00:26:56,030
It helped.
579
00:26:56,030 --> 00:27:00,820
Your people are out there.
You just need to find them.
580
00:27:00,820 --> 00:27:02,160
โ Yeah.
581
00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:05,160
[ambient music]
582
00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:09,790
โช โช
583
00:27:09,790 --> 00:27:12,580
โ [laughs]
Whoa, okay.
584
00:27:12,580 --> 00:27:14,840
Now I see why you needed
so much storage space.
585
00:27:14,840 --> 00:27:16,090
โ I know.
It's a lot.
586
00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:21,300
โ What changed your mind?
587
00:27:21,300 --> 00:27:23,010
โ I justโโ
588
00:27:23,010 --> 00:27:25,850
I just wanted to do something
that matters, you know?
589
00:27:25,850 --> 00:27:28,270
And I really believe that
if I can convince The Belle
590
00:27:28,270 --> 00:27:31,310
to give me this podcast,
then I can.
591
00:27:31,310 --> 00:27:37,320
So now I just have
to sell all this stuff,
592
00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:41,150
and I feel like
I can't do it by myself.
593
00:27:41,150 --> 00:27:44,830
โ Well, the hardest part
is just the start.
594
00:27:44,830 --> 00:27:46,120
โ Yeah.
595
00:27:46,120 --> 00:27:48,040
โ Why don't we just start
with the furniture?
596
00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:49,000
โ Yes.
โ Yes.
597
00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:50,000
This is aโโ
โ Love that.
598
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:51,830
โ Whoa, this is kind of broken.
599
00:27:51,830 --> 00:27:53,170
You're not gonna
get much for this.
600
00:27:53,170 --> 00:27:54,960
We could list it
for, like, 20 bucks.
601
00:27:54,960 --> 00:27:57,300
โ 20 bucks?
โ Yeah.
602
00:27:57,300 --> 00:27:58,260
โ It's a nice table.
603
00:28:02,180 --> 00:28:04,340
โ This is kind of hard,
isn't it, Kat?
604
00:28:04,340 --> 00:28:06,640
โ Kind of, yeah.
605
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:10,850
โ Look, the more you do it,
the easier it gets.
606
00:28:10,850 --> 00:28:12,190
Trust meโโwhen I was 12,
607
00:28:12,190 --> 00:28:13,850
we had to move
to a smaller space
608
00:28:13,850 --> 00:28:18,230
in a better school district,
and I left a lot behind,
609
00:28:18,230 --> 00:28:23,700
in particular, a desk with tons
of Pokรฉmon stickers on it.
610
00:28:23,700 --> 00:28:25,200
โ Pokรฉmon.
โ [laughs]
611
00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:28,700
Hey, I'm not ashamed.
It's aโโit comes back around.
612
00:28:28,700 --> 00:28:32,000
Anyway, I loved this desk.
It helped me become a writer.
613
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:34,170
And when it was time
to say goodโbye,
614
00:28:34,170 --> 00:28:35,920
IโโI just couldn't.
615
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:36,920
I freaked out.
616
00:28:36,920 --> 00:28:39,300
But my mom had me explain
617
00:28:39,300 --> 00:28:43,220
why every sticker
was so important.
618
00:28:45,090 --> 00:28:49,220
Turns out that sharing...
619
00:28:51,270 --> 00:28:52,390
Actually helped.
620
00:28:55,020 --> 00:28:56,980
So tell me
about old Wobbles here.
621
00:28:56,980 --> 00:28:59,690
Why is it so wobbly?
622
00:28:59,690 --> 00:29:03,030
Come on, I know there's
a story behind it.
623
00:29:03,030 --> 00:29:04,820
โ It was actually
the first piece of furniture
624
00:29:04,820 --> 00:29:08,160
that I put together
all by myself.
625
00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:11,200
I wanted to do it alone,
and I did.
626
00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:12,370
I mean, yeah,
627
00:29:12,370 --> 00:29:16,210
there were a couple
of pieces left over, but...
628
00:29:16,210 --> 00:29:19,210
โ A couple?
โ Stop.
629
00:29:19,210 --> 00:29:20,920
[phone buzzes]
630
00:29:25,720 --> 00:29:27,720
โ It's okay, sweetie.
She's really nice.
631
00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:31,140
You're gonna like her a lot.
Oh, it's okay.
632
00:29:31,140 --> 00:29:32,850
[solemn music]
633
00:29:32,850 --> 00:29:36,020
It's okay.
634
00:29:36,020 --> 00:29:39,820
โช โช
635
00:29:39,820 --> 00:29:42,150
Leo, this is Sutton.
636
00:29:42,150 --> 00:29:44,780
She picked out some clothes
for your party.
637
00:29:44,780 --> 00:29:49,160
โช โช
638
00:29:49,160 --> 00:29:52,290
โ Nice to meet you, Leo.
639
00:29:52,290 --> 00:29:58,040
I heard that you are graduating
from kindergarten.
640
00:29:58,040 --> 00:29:59,920
How do you feel
about dressing like your daddy?
641
00:29:59,920 --> 00:30:01,290
Does that sound cool?
โ Yeah.
642
00:30:01,290 --> 00:30:02,840
โ Yeah?
Okay.
643
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:07,930
Let's see if this jacket fits.
Mmโhmm.
644
00:30:07,930 --> 00:30:11,100
Oh, wow.
You look so handsome.
645
00:30:11,100 --> 00:30:14,220
And it's a perfect fit.
How do you feel?
646
00:30:14,220 --> 00:30:16,850
โ Important.
Thanks, Sutton.
647
00:30:16,850 --> 00:30:19,900
โ Oh.
Aw.
648
00:30:22,110 --> 00:30:24,940
Ow.
[groans]
649
00:30:24,940 --> 00:30:27,110
โ Are you okay?
โ Yes.
650
00:30:27,110 --> 00:30:28,200
I'm just having
some stomach pain.
651
00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:31,240
I should probably...
652
00:30:31,240 --> 00:30:33,200
I should probably go.
653
00:30:39,170 --> 00:30:40,460
โ Thanks for coming over.
654
00:30:40,460 --> 00:30:41,920
โ Is that
your queer prom dress?
655
00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:45,090
โ Yeah.
โ I love that dress.
656
00:30:45,090 --> 00:30:48,510
โ Me too.
You know what's crazy?
657
00:30:48,510 --> 00:30:50,260
That night at the Wild Susan,
658
00:30:50,260 --> 00:30:51,510
and the fact that
we couldn't save itโโ
659
00:30:51,510 --> 00:30:55,180
that's the whole reason
why I ran for city council.
660
00:30:55,180 --> 00:30:57,310
It feels like that
was so long ago.
661
00:30:57,310 --> 00:30:58,350
โ Yeah.
662
00:31:01,230 --> 00:31:02,270
So much has changed since then.
663
00:31:02,270 --> 00:31:04,230
โ I know.
That's why I called you.
664
00:31:04,230 --> 00:31:08,280
I know we've been checking in
on Sutton a lot lately,
665
00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:13,200
and things have been
kind of crazy and intense,
666
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:16,330
but I just wanna check in on
you and make sure you're okay.
667
00:31:16,330 --> 00:31:18,910
Because I feel like
I pushed you,
668
00:31:18,910 --> 00:31:23,340
and if you're not ready to
move on from things with Ryanโโ
669
00:31:23,340 --> 00:31:26,590
โ It's not that.
[sighs]
670
00:31:26,590 --> 00:31:31,300
I mean, yeah,
671
00:31:31,300 --> 00:31:34,100
Ryan was supposed
to be my person.
672
00:31:34,100 --> 00:31:37,180
I was so focused
on getting better
673
00:31:37,180 --> 00:31:39,640
that I think I just buried
the pain of our breakup,
674
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:42,480
and IโโI haven't dealt
with it.
675
00:31:46,110 --> 00:31:48,320
But the other night
wasn't even about that.
676
00:31:51,110 --> 00:31:54,450
It was about these things,
and I justโโ
677
00:31:54,450 --> 00:31:57,540
I'm not comfortable with them.
678
00:31:57,540 --> 00:32:01,250
And IโโI want so badly to be,
but I'm not.
679
00:32:01,250 --> 00:32:06,460
And I justโโwhen Kevin tried
to touch me there,
680
00:32:06,460 --> 00:32:09,300
I justโโI freaked out.
681
00:32:09,300 --> 00:32:12,300
[exhales]
682
00:32:12,300 --> 00:32:14,340
โ I'm sorry.
I had no idea.
683
00:32:14,340 --> 00:32:18,560
โ I didn't either.
Oh.
684
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:23,270
But now that I do,
I think I need help.
685
00:32:23,270 --> 00:32:29,150
โ Well, whatever you need,
I got you.
686
00:32:29,150 --> 00:32:31,320
โ [chuckles]
687
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:34,070
That's the thingโโ
is you can't help.
688
00:32:34,070 --> 00:32:36,200
Not with this.
689
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:38,330
I think I need
690
00:32:38,330 --> 00:32:41,960
people who have been
in my situation before.
691
00:32:43,370 --> 00:32:48,000
Which is why I wrote
a piece about it,
692
00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:50,300
to see if maybe
I could find people like me.
693
00:32:50,300 --> 00:32:53,220
And I called a meeting
at The Belle
694
00:32:53,220 --> 00:32:55,140
at 9:00 a. m. tomorrow.
695
00:32:55,140 --> 00:32:59,220
We'll see if people show up.
โ I think they will.
696
00:32:59,220 --> 00:33:02,560
I hope they will.
โ Me too.
697
00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:04,730
โ Hey, will you give me a hug
at least?
698
00:33:04,730 --> 00:33:06,190
โ [scoffs]
Duh.
699
00:33:06,190 --> 00:33:08,060
โ Come on.
โ [laughs]
700
00:33:08,060 --> 00:33:10,230
โ Baby, get over here.
701
00:33:13,240 --> 00:33:16,200
โ I love you.
โ I love you.
702
00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:18,620
Oh, the last piece
is all yours, yeah.
703
00:33:18,620 --> 00:33:21,160
โ What?
โ [exhales]
704
00:33:21,160 --> 00:33:22,290
โ But you love that couch.
705
00:33:22,290 --> 00:33:24,540
โ I know,
but I had to sell her.
706
00:33:24,540 --> 00:33:27,250
Sorry.
Excuse us.
707
00:33:27,250 --> 00:33:29,500
Bye, Connie.
708
00:33:29,500 --> 00:33:32,170
Have a great life.
โ Bye, girl.
709
00:33:32,170 --> 00:33:33,010
โ Oh.
710
00:33:34,420 --> 00:33:37,640
โ Ian, you home?
โ I'm in the bedroom.
711
00:33:38,470 --> 00:33:39,510
โ Ian?
712
00:33:39,510 --> 00:33:41,140
โช โช
713
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:49,650
What is all of this?
714
00:33:49,650 --> 00:33:52,650
โ I do see you, Jacqueline,
715
00:33:52,650 --> 00:33:55,610
as sexy, and exciting,
716
00:33:55,610 --> 00:33:57,070
and the love of my life.
717
00:33:59,320 --> 00:34:00,580
You see, I'm not a writer.
718
00:34:00,580 --> 00:34:04,450
I don't have the words
to explain how I see you,
719
00:34:04,450 --> 00:34:07,210
not in the way that Miles does.
720
00:34:07,210 --> 00:34:11,460
โ Ianโโ
โ But I am a photographer.
721
00:34:11,460 --> 00:34:13,670
And I want to show you
722
00:34:13,670 --> 00:34:17,300
what I see when I look at you.
723
00:34:19,260 --> 00:34:24,220
Because you are
everything to me.
724
00:34:24,220 --> 00:34:27,270
[tender music]
725
00:34:27,270 --> 00:34:29,350
โช โช
726
00:34:29,350 --> 00:34:32,150
โ Well...
727
00:34:32,150 --> 00:34:37,200
For someone who's
not a wordsmith,
728
00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:38,070
that was pretty good.
729
00:34:49,210 --> 00:34:51,580
โ Beautiful.
730
00:34:51,580 --> 00:34:58,590
โช โช
731
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:13,230
โ Does it hurt?
732
00:35:13,230 --> 00:35:16,570
โ Yeah, but I'll be fine.
733
00:35:18,570 --> 00:35:20,200
โ Can I get you anything?
734
00:35:20,200 --> 00:35:24,330
โ Oh, I'm so sorry.
735
00:35:24,330 --> 00:35:26,290
โ It's not your fault.
736
00:35:26,290 --> 00:35:30,170
[solemn music]
737
00:35:30,170 --> 00:35:33,170
โ [crying]
738
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:44,640
["Just The Way I Am" playing]
739
00:35:44,640 --> 00:35:46,560
โช โช
740
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:49,140
โ โช I like lingerie,
silk and lace โช
741
00:35:49,140 --> 00:35:50,850
โช And waking up alone โช
742
00:35:50,850 --> 00:35:52,810
โช Don't mind the taste
of chardonnay โช
743
00:35:52,810 --> 00:35:54,560
โช I'd rather sip merlot โช
744
00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:55,730
โช Sometimes I go out โช
745
00:35:55,730 --> 00:35:56,730
โช And shut it down โช
746
00:35:56,730 --> 00:35:58,110
โช Do just what I want โช
747
00:35:58,110 --> 00:36:01,240
โช Be just who I wanna be โช
748
00:36:01,240 --> 00:36:02,410
โ Hi.
749
00:36:02,410 --> 00:36:03,820
โ Yeah.
โ Hi.
750
00:36:03,820 --> 00:36:05,580
โ โช There ain't no one else โช
751
00:36:05,580 --> 00:36:07,620
โช Whoo โช
752
00:36:07,620 --> 00:36:10,830
โช Knows me like myself โช
753
00:36:10,830 --> 00:36:14,290
โ You know, it's too bad that
it's only for Belle members,
754
00:36:14,290 --> 00:36:16,540
or I would offer myself up
as your first guest.
755
00:36:16,540 --> 00:36:18,630
โ Totally, and if it weren't
a "Belle" podcast,
756
00:36:18,630 --> 00:36:21,260
I would absolutely
take you up on that.
757
00:36:21,260 --> 00:36:22,430
โ You wouldn't, would you?
758
00:36:22,430 --> 00:36:25,100
โ Mm, no, but it's not
'cause you're not great.
759
00:36:25,100 --> 00:36:26,930
It's just 'cause I have
another guest in mind.
760
00:36:26,930 --> 00:36:31,940
โ Well, there's no way
that she's better than me.
761
00:36:31,940 --> 00:36:34,900
โ She runs a domestic
violence shelter.
762
00:36:34,900 --> 00:36:37,230
โ Wow, well,
don't I feel like an ass.
763
00:36:37,230 --> 00:36:39,940
โ You're not an ass.
You're the best, actually,
764
00:36:39,940 --> 00:36:43,820
'cause without you,
none of this would've happened.
765
00:36:43,820 --> 00:36:47,370
โ Oh.
โ I actually got you something.
766
00:36:47,370 --> 00:36:50,790
I know that you don't have
your desk anymore,
767
00:36:50,790 --> 00:36:52,250
but you do have a laptop.
768
00:36:52,250 --> 00:36:54,120
And I hear that
all the cool kids
769
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:56,210
put stickers
on their laptops now, so...
770
00:36:56,210 --> 00:36:59,130
โ โช 'Cause I'm aware
of where this could go โช
771
00:36:59,130 --> 00:37:03,760
โ Whoa, Pokรฉmon stickers.
[squeals]
772
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:06,720
โ [laughs]
โ Thank you.
773
00:37:06,720 --> 00:37:09,220
This is so awesome.
You have no idea.
774
00:37:09,220 --> 00:37:11,310
โ โช To leave you lonely โช
775
00:37:11,310 --> 00:37:13,480
โช Got no regrets,
no sorry โช
776
00:37:13,480 --> 00:37:14,690
[phone chimes]
777
00:37:14,690 --> 00:37:16,520
โช I can't help myself โช
778
00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,310
โช It's just the way I am โช
779
00:37:18,310 --> 00:37:21,860
โช Stubborn,
but still you want me โช
780
00:37:21,860 --> 00:37:25,780
โช But don't wait up
for apologies โช
781
00:37:25,780 --> 00:37:28,990
โช Take it
or leave me, baby โช
782
00:37:28,990 --> 00:37:30,540
โช I can't help myself โช
783
00:37:30,540 --> 00:37:34,290
โ Jane Sloan?
โ Yeah?
784
00:37:34,290 --> 00:37:36,670
โ I read your article.
I'm Erica.
785
00:37:36,670 --> 00:37:37,920
โ Hi.
786
00:37:37,920 --> 00:37:40,380
โ I had my preventative
mastectomy six months ago.
787
00:37:40,380 --> 00:37:42,340
I know what you're
going through.
788
00:37:42,340 --> 00:37:47,220
I think I can help.
โ Yeah.
789
00:37:47,220 --> 00:37:48,260
Are you here for Jane?
790
00:37:48,260 --> 00:37:49,890
โ Yeah, hi.
I'm Portia.
791
00:37:49,890 --> 00:37:51,510
โ Nice to meet you.
โ This is my friend, Erin.
792
00:37:51,510 --> 00:37:54,140
โ HiโโJane.
โ I'm Erica.
793
00:37:54,140 --> 00:37:55,980
โ โช It's just the way I am โช
794
00:37:55,980 --> 00:37:58,560
โ Honey, I'm home.
โ [laughs]
795
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:00,730
Are you gonna do that
every time?
796
00:38:00,730 --> 00:38:03,360
โ Maybe.
How was your day?
797
00:38:03,360 --> 00:38:06,320
Did you find your people?
โ Yeah, I think I did.
798
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:07,950
โ That's good.
799
00:38:10,200 --> 00:38:13,580
โ [gasps]
Oh, my God.
800
00:38:13,580 --> 00:38:16,410
Is that Connie?
โ Yeah, it is!
801
00:38:16,410 --> 00:38:18,790
โ Oh, my God!
802
00:38:18,790 --> 00:38:20,500
โ I always thought
it would look great in here,
803
00:38:20,500 --> 00:38:21,840
and so I tracked down
the buyer.
804
00:38:21,840 --> 00:38:23,670
โ You did?
โ Mmโhmm.
805
00:38:23,670 --> 00:38:24,960
โ So now she'll be here
806
00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:26,970
to comfort you
through whatever's next.
807
00:38:26,970 --> 00:38:29,140
โ Thanks.
โ You're welcome.
808
00:38:29,140 --> 00:38:32,220
โ Oh, you're literally
the best.
809
00:38:32,220 --> 00:38:34,560
โ [laughs]
โ And also kind of insane.
810
00:38:34,560 --> 00:38:36,980
[phone buzzes]
811
00:38:36,980 --> 00:38:40,400
Oh.
โ Oh, it's Sutton.
812
00:38:40,400 --> 00:38:41,690
โ Okay.
โ We should probably go.
813
00:38:41,690 --> 00:38:44,440
โ Come on.
Yeah, let's go.
814
00:38:44,440 --> 00:38:48,610
โ โช If I could,
I wouldn't want you โช
815
00:38:48,610 --> 00:38:52,910
โช But it's getting late now
and I can't stop โช
816
00:38:52,910 --> 00:38:54,870
โช It's so easy
till there's no way out โช
817
00:38:54,870 --> 00:38:57,210
โ Is there anything you need?
818
00:38:57,210 --> 00:38:59,830
โ How are you feeling, baby?
819
00:38:59,830 --> 00:39:03,670
โ โช Fools falling
in the dark like crazy โช
820
00:39:03,670 --> 00:39:05,710
โ [sighs]
I feel...
821
00:39:05,710 --> 00:39:09,050
โ โช Nothing you can do
will save me now โช
822
00:39:09,050 --> 00:39:13,810
โ Hey, it's okay to feel sad.
823
00:39:13,810 --> 00:39:16,720
โ I know.
824
00:39:16,720 --> 00:39:18,770
โ โช Break my broken โช
825
00:39:18,770 --> 00:39:20,400
โ Oh, God.
826
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:23,400
[crying]
827
00:39:23,400 --> 00:39:26,690
โ โช Give me all you got,
all you got โช
828
00:39:26,690 --> 00:39:30,200
โช Break my broken heart โช
829
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:32,820
โ I just don't know
what's wrong with me.
830
00:39:32,820 --> 00:39:34,120
โ What?
831
00:39:34,120 --> 00:39:35,540
Hey, what are you
talking about?
832
00:39:35,540 --> 00:39:37,040
โ There is nothing wrong
with you.
833
00:39:37,040 --> 00:39:40,250
โ โช I'm still breathing โช
834
00:39:40,250 --> 00:39:44,040
โ Hey, whatever
you are feeling right now,
835
00:39:44,040 --> 00:39:46,340
it's okay.
836
00:39:46,340 --> 00:39:51,720
โ Yeah.
But, like...
837
00:39:51,720 --> 00:39:54,550
What if I feel relieved?
838
00:39:54,550 --> 00:39:57,020
'Cause I think I do.
839
00:39:57,020 --> 00:39:59,680
I think I feel relieved
that I'm not having this baby.
840
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:02,980
โ โช Break my broken heart โช
841
00:40:02,980 --> 00:40:05,570
โ Okay.
842
00:40:05,570 --> 00:40:09,110
โ I can't believe
I just said that out loud.
843
00:40:09,110 --> 00:40:12,820
[exhales]
844
00:40:12,820 --> 00:40:16,870
Does that make me
a terrible person?
845
00:40:16,870 --> 00:40:19,830
โ No, of course not.
โ No way.
846
00:40:19,830 --> 00:40:22,250
Mmโmm.
โ [sighs]
847
00:40:22,250 --> 00:40:23,420
โ It's okay.
848
00:40:23,420 --> 00:40:25,630
โ โช So what's one more scar โช
849
00:40:25,630 --> 00:40:26,420
โช Break my โช
850
00:40:26,420 --> 00:40:33,340
โช Broken heart โช
61760
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