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1
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Grape and cookies.
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Good evening.
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fudge nutty?
4
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If you are on a break...
5
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Perhaps someone else can assist me.
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I am the only one here.
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What exactly are you looking for?
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Something like this.
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Note the unusual filigree.
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Rise and shine, my boy.
11
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Where am I?
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Who am I?
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You are tohru,
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my most loyal henchman.
15
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Jackie, next time you take Jade to movies by yourself.
16
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Popcorn stale, sound too loud...
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And story unrealistic.
18
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you expected reality
19
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from brain-draining freaks from planet medulla?
20
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Hey, I'm sleeping with noseplugs tonight.
21
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No alien's getting its mitts on my brain matter.
22
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I told tohru never to leave shop door open!
23
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You let mosquitoes in and the air conditioning out!
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Hey, t! You missed a classic.
25
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Jade: Tohru?
26
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Hello?
27
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He probably just stepped out for a minute.
28
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Tohru would never leave without writing note.
29
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And he would never leave a cookie uneaten.
30
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I am valmont.
31
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don't you remember me?
32
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I remember nothing.
33
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Jolly good potion.
34
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It would seem you are the victim of amnesia.
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Allow me to fill in some blanks.
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I am the leader of the dark hand,
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a premiere crime syndicate,
38
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and you work for me.
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Premiere crime syndicate?
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a temporary setback, I assure you,
41
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but it was only yesterday
42
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that you and I were at the top of our game.
43
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See? You made the FBI's most wanted,
44
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3 years running.
45
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so it is true. But how?
46
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Our Nemesis must have throttled you famously
47
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for your entire memory just to up and vanish.
48
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Nemesis?
49
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Jackie chan.
50
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Chan will pay.
51
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In good time, loyal one, in good time.
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First, we have a very important flight to catch.
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Yu mo gue guai fi di ziao.
54
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Yu mo gue guai fi di ziao.
55
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Tohru is there.
56
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How did he get there?
57
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Told you he's been kidnapped.
58
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Let's bring our boy home.
59
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Master, are there no closer banks for us to rob?
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We have not traveled to Sri Lanka
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for any run-of-the-mill heist, tohru.
62
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We are here for the score of a lifetime.
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And the beauty of it?
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All we require is your muscle
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and the instructions to a secret location,
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which we are soon to collect.
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Now, be on your best behavior.
68
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Yes, master.
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Chundi!
70
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How my heart soars to see you again.
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Master babur, it pleases me
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to introduce my protg tohru.
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any brother to chundi
74
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is a brother to our monastery.
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Tohru, assume lotus position
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while babur and I catch up.
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So, chundi,
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could it be you have finally returned
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to attain true enrichment?
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You have a way with words, master babur.
81
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Then you shall be among the privileged few,
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the purest of spirit,
83
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who have communed at the legendary temple.
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Your companion is also worthy?
85
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yes, indeed.
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Tohru possesses great strength--
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uh, inner strength-- of a most spiritual nature.
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Then come. Allow me to bestow upon you the directions
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to the temple of the golden elephant.
90
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Uncle...
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I'm parched.
92
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Can't we just drink it?
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We are out of water.
94
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Do you want to find tohru?
95
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Yes?
96
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Then we must not drink locator spell!
97
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how about now?
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Tohru!
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he is safe.
100
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What's he doing?
101
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It would seem my apprentice seeks inner peace.
102
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So I will give him piece...Of uncle,
103
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for making us worry ourselves sick!
104
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And I will fetch us some water.
105
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Hey, big fella!
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Remove yourself, child.
107
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What's with the 'tude, dude?
108
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I came halfway around the world to find you.
109
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You are lousy shopkeeper!
110
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You leave without sweeping.
111
00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:06,358
Uncle could have slipped on crumbs and broken hip!
112
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What are you jabbering about, old fool?
113
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You speak to your sensei that way?
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Tohru, what is with you?
115
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You...Know my name?
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Jackie, I don't think tohru recognizes us.
117
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What? Oh, do not be silly, Jade.
118
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Jackie chan.
119
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See? Tohru knows exactly who I am.
120
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My Nemesis!
121
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Tohru, it is me, Jackie!
122
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Yes, I know. Yaah!
123
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Jackie, don't hurt tohru!
124
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What about me?
125
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Tohru, whatever I did to anger you I am sorry!
126
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Lastly, you will both emerge from the bamboo forest
127
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to find yourselves at the lake of riddles.
128
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what was that?
129
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Freak pottery accident.
130
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Frightful how they'll just spontaneously combust.
131
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Shall we press on then?
132
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Tohru: I will crush you!
133
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Tohru is not acting like himself.
134
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Oh, yes, he is.
135
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His old self.
136
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Chundi, what are you hiding?
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This is not the behavior of one
138
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who is prepared to visit the temple.
139
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Which reminds me, left or right at the lake?
140
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Across.
141
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Oop.
142
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Thank you, master.
143
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And now that I have been enlightened,
144
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let us forget that we ever had this chat.
145
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It's time to jog tohru's memory!
146
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Tohru, remember all those times
147
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we butt-whupped the shadowkhan?
148
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The who?
149
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ok, never mind them.
150
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Well, how about the time you helped me get over the crush I had
151
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on the kid in my class who was a demon?
152
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There is no such thing as demons.
153
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Tohru, remember?
154
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Your favorite--
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grape soda.
156
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Grape what?
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Tohru, stop this!
158
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Why are you acting like you work for the dark hand?
159
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Because I work for the dark hand.
160
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Then shame on you!
161
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Just like old times.
162
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Maybe that will knock some sense into him.
163
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But how did it get knocked out of him in the first place?
164
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He's how!
165
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Valmont! - Valmont!
166
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What have you done to tohru?
167
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Last I saw, he was rolling down a hill.
168
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Your doing, I believe.
169
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Tell us the truth, friar liar!
170
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Perhaps tohru had enough of sweeping floors
171
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and decided to take a better offer.
172
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Mine.
173
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Uncle: Sweeping floors may be dirty work,
174
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but it is honest!
175
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Tohru is family.
176
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He'd never join you again!
177
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Well, if you don't believe me...
178
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Why don't you just ask him?
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Tohru, please.
180
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T, don't listen to valmont!
181
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You will pay for this.
182
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Dark hand 3, Jackie chan 0.
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Come, tohru.
184
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Yes, master.
185
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We are trapped!
186
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And we've lost tohru.
187
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For good.
188
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It is no use.
189
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Well, if valmont can crawl out from under a rock,
190
00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:48,473
to steal back tohru, we can, too.
191
00:11:48,475 --> 00:11:51,810
Steal him back, I mean, er, again.
192
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Uncle: Yu mo gue guai fi di ziao.
193
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Yu mo gue guai fi di ziao.
194
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Yu mo gue guai fi di zi--
195
00:12:00,519 --> 00:12:03,855
uncle, you rock! Levitation spell?
196
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Uncle cannot pack spell ingredients for every occasion!
197
00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:21,973
Sheesh! Who says mud baths are relaxing?
198
00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:23,908
Did you see where tohru went?
199
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Big fellow.
200
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Master babur has lost his memory.
201
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,716
Who is babur?
202
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See?
203
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Whoa. This amnesia bug's really going around.
204
00:12:35,756 --> 00:12:40,091
Hotcha! If babur and tohru both have amnesia,
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valmont must have used a potion on them.
206
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And with that potion, uncle can devise antidote to bring back tohru's memory.
207
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Valmont must still have it with him.
208
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We just have to find him.
209
00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:55,140
there is no hope of that.
210
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The strangers have embarked for the temple of the golden elephant,
211
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and only master babur knows where it is.
212
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Are you my mother?
213
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the temple's location is lost forever.
214
00:13:08,688 --> 00:13:14,526
Oh? Can of grape soda tells uncle otherwise.
215
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The golden elephant lies within that temple.
216
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don't you recognize boiling water?
217
00:13:27,674 --> 00:13:31,976
now, how do we get across?
218
00:13:36,382 --> 00:13:37,582
A riddle?
219
00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:40,151
Perhaps if we answer it...
220
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:44,422
"What do you call the life story of a car?"
221
00:13:44,424 --> 00:13:46,658
Uh, cartoon?
222
00:13:46,660 --> 00:13:48,493
Vehicular memoirs?
223
00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:51,896
Autobiography!
224
00:13:56,101 --> 00:13:58,503
I was about to say that.
225
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Toodle-oo!
226
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Oopsy.
227
00:14:07,313 --> 00:14:08,980
Come on, come on!
228
00:14:18,824 --> 00:14:20,992
Jackie! Water very hot!
229
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I am not soup yet!
230
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And he spikes the landing!
231
00:14:38,044 --> 00:14:39,711
How do we get across now?
232
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Did you not pay attention?
233
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We must answer riddle.
234
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No problemo.
235
00:14:47,721 --> 00:14:49,854
"What is the beginning of eternity...
236
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"The end of time and space,
237
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"the beginning of every end,
238
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and the end of every place?"
239
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No fair! We got a brainbuster!
240
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At last.
241
00:15:04,437 --> 00:15:09,007
My ticket - to a life of luxury!
242
00:15:11,577 --> 00:15:14,913
And so few have seen it, it will never be missed.
243
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End of every place...
244
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End of every place.
245
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The exit?
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I wish this was a lake of crosswords.
247
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I am better at those.
248
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Uncle: Eeeeeee!
249
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Stub your toe?
250
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The answer to the riddle.
251
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The end of time and place.
252
00:15:29,930 --> 00:15:34,399
In English, it is the letter "e."
253
00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:39,137
Well, uncle.
254
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Just lift with your legs and pack up that pachyderm!
255
00:15:48,081 --> 00:15:49,480
Yes, master.
256
00:16:01,427 --> 00:16:03,294
Funny how the guy who can't remember
257
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is trying to steal the animal that never forgets.
258
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Stop, tohru!
259
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If you remove the elephant,
260
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something very bad will happen!
261
00:16:12,038 --> 00:16:13,905
Which would be?
262
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Do not recall.
263
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I'm expert in Chinese mythology, not Indian.
264
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don't listen. Our enemies are just trying
265
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to trick you again.
266
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Now I remember.
267
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Stone sentinels will destroy
268
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whomever attempts to steal elephant.
269
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I never touched it!
270
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T!
271
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Oooh!
272
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Uncle! Your spell!
273
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Do you not listen?
274
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Uncle cannot make amnesia antidote
275
00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:29,847
without amnesia potion!
276
00:17:30,783 --> 00:17:34,218
The turn-stone-into-mud spell.
277
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,888
Ah, that one uncle can do.
278
00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:39,257
And while you work your magic...
279
00:17:42,761 --> 00:17:44,929
I'll motion for some potion.
280
00:17:53,872 --> 00:17:55,840
Ha! The artful bungler.
281
00:17:56,408 --> 00:17:57,708
Hand it over!
282
00:17:57,710 --> 00:17:59,911
Say pretty please!
283
00:17:59,913 --> 00:18:02,814
Jade, did you see where uncle put dried blowfish?
284
00:18:02,816 --> 00:18:04,449
Cannot complete spell without it.
285
00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:09,287
Uncle, are you ok?
286
00:18:09,289 --> 00:18:11,789
Uncle! Uncle who?
287
00:18:11,791 --> 00:18:12,957
Oh, boy.
288
00:18:12,959 --> 00:18:15,159
Fare thee well, you old goat!
289
00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:18,062
Ah, I am a goat.
290
00:18:18,064 --> 00:18:20,264
No! You're uncle,
291
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:22,467
the only one who can bring back tohru!
292
00:18:24,736 --> 00:18:26,771
Ecch! You're disgusting!
293
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:36,781
The harder they are...
294
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:38,716
The bigger they break.
295
00:19:08,947 --> 00:19:11,082
Many thanks for your help, chan.
296
00:19:11,084 --> 00:19:13,117
A shame tohru must render you senseless
297
00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:16,120
so we may get on with our crime unhindered.
298
00:19:16,122 --> 00:19:18,156
Uh, tohru, if you please.
299
00:19:18,158 --> 00:19:19,757
No.
300
00:19:20,959 --> 00:19:23,060
What do you mean, no?
301
00:19:23,062 --> 00:19:26,631
You were not so loyal to your loyal henchman.
302
00:19:26,633 --> 00:19:31,135
Well, I--I was simply hoping to duck away
303
00:19:31,137 --> 00:19:33,938
and find a large mallet with which to assist.
304
00:19:33,940 --> 00:19:37,275
Something inside tells me that Jackie is my friend.
305
00:19:38,477 --> 00:19:41,145
And something inside tells me
306
00:19:41,147 --> 00:19:43,714
that you are forgetting who is boss.
307
00:19:47,152 --> 00:19:48,452
Bull's-eye!
308
00:19:48,454 --> 00:19:50,154
Where am I?
309
00:19:50,156 --> 00:19:51,489
The ballet.
310
00:19:51,491 --> 00:19:53,958
You're doing a fabulous swan lake.
311
00:20:00,332 --> 00:20:03,067
Valmont can pirouette all the way to prison.
312
00:20:03,069 --> 00:20:04,202
Prison?
313
00:20:04,204 --> 00:20:06,470
You need not worry, tohru.
314
00:20:06,472 --> 00:20:08,839
Elephants may remember with their heads,
315
00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:11,342
but you remembered us with your heart.
316
00:20:11,344 --> 00:20:12,543
Uh, Jackie?
317
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:15,513
That's all he's gonna remember us with
318
00:20:15,515 --> 00:20:18,950
if we don't figure out how to get uncle's memory back.
319
00:20:20,886 --> 00:20:22,286
Ta-da! - Baa!
320
00:20:23,388 --> 00:20:25,690
Then perhaps we should start doing some...
321
00:20:25,692 --> 00:20:27,425
Research. Research.
322
00:20:32,197 --> 00:20:35,032
Hey, Jackie, what's your favorite food?
323
00:20:35,034 --> 00:20:36,200
Anything fast.
324
00:20:36,202 --> 00:20:37,868
I really don't like to sit there.
325
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:40,238
12 people sit there, they give you a soup.
326
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:43,274
You have to wait. 12 people all have a soup.
327
00:20:43,276 --> 00:20:44,809
The soup already cold.
328
00:20:44,811 --> 00:20:46,077
I like everything quick.
329
00:20:46,079 --> 00:20:47,178
Done.
22109
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