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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:01:07,849 --> 00:01:09,473 - James you're fired. - Yes sir. 4 00:01:09,858 --> 00:01:11,287 - Screw off. - Yes sir. 5 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:33,669 Well, well, well, hello! 6 00:01:33,885 --> 00:01:36,282 Well, well, well George, how are you today? 7 00:01:36,333 --> 00:01:37,680 Glad to see you Harry. 8 00:01:37,752 --> 00:01:38,808 I'm glad to see you sir. 9 00:01:38,880 --> 00:01:40,978 Glad to see you on the job, bright and early. 10 00:01:41,941 --> 00:01:43,938 - Have to work you know. - Oh yes. 11 00:01:44,467 --> 00:01:46,027 It's a nice day isn't it Harry? 12 00:01:46,067 --> 00:01:48,175 Yes, George, I think it's a very nice day. 13 00:01:48,222 --> 00:01:49,919 I just think it's lovely today. 14 00:01:50,133 --> 00:01:52,167 You know, I would, eh... 15 00:01:54,233 --> 00:01:56,543 Looks like it's going to rain a bit Harry. 16 00:01:58,605 --> 00:02:01,455 Oh, what's the matter Mary, you don't look good. 17 00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:03,695 - Oh, I feel terrible. - Aww. 18 00:02:03,928 --> 00:02:06,777 My boss told me today that if I didn't kiss him, he'd fire me. 19 00:02:06,979 --> 00:02:08,808 A girl hasn't got a chance at all. 20 00:02:08,928 --> 00:02:11,195 Oh don't be silly, you have two chances. 21 00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:13,760 Either you kiss him or you don't kiss him. 22 00:02:13,895 --> 00:02:15,631 I know, but what if I don't kiss him? 23 00:02:15,874 --> 00:02:18,473 Well, you still have two chances. 24 00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:21,327 Either you get fired or you don't get fired. 25 00:02:21,490 --> 00:02:23,460 Well, what if I get fired? 26 00:02:23,609 --> 00:02:26,260 Well, uh, well you still have two chances. 27 00:02:26,325 --> 00:02:28,349 Either you starve or you don't starve. 28 00:02:28,513 --> 00:02:30,336 Alright, but what if I starve? 29 00:02:30,633 --> 00:02:33,260 Well, uh, you still have two chances. 30 00:02:33,444 --> 00:02:35,760 Either you die or you don't die. 31 00:02:35,986 --> 00:02:38,964 - Well, what if I die? - You still have two chances. 32 00:02:39,099 --> 00:02:42,610 Either you go to heaven, or you, oh well you better kiss your boss. 33 00:02:42,733 --> 00:02:45,460 Well I never heard of anything so foolish in my whole life. 34 00:02:45,535 --> 00:02:46,664 Aww, well you're silly. 35 00:02:46,889 --> 00:02:49,025 - What's the matter Harry? - Well you don't look good. 36 00:02:49,106 --> 00:02:50,929 Well, I lost quite a bit of money at bridge. 37 00:02:50,970 --> 00:02:52,489 - Bridge? - Huh, never lose. 38 00:02:52,770 --> 00:02:54,530 That's because you haven't got a system. 39 00:02:54,589 --> 00:02:56,584 With me, everything has a system. 40 00:02:56,725 --> 00:02:59,051 Never lose money in bridge, a system. 41 00:02:59,259 --> 00:03:01,603 Never lose money in poker, a system. 42 00:03:01,724 --> 00:03:03,582 Any kind of a card game, a system. 43 00:03:04,749 --> 00:03:07,463 Even a horse has a system, you know Harry. 44 00:03:07,706 --> 00:03:10,293 Eat the right kind of food, never get sick, a system. 45 00:03:10,492 --> 00:03:13,938 Eh, flirt with women, never get my face slapped, a system. 46 00:03:14,092 --> 00:03:16,419 My whole live consists of, everything is a system. 47 00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:18,886 Yeah? Say that's alright. Tell me one of them will ya? 48 00:03:19,016 --> 00:03:20,023 Which one? 49 00:03:20,064 --> 00:03:22,046 Well, the one about flirting with the girls. 50 00:03:22,159 --> 00:03:23,617 - Flirting with the girls. - Yeah. 51 00:03:23,807 --> 00:03:25,857 Well, the first thing you do, you pick out a name 52 00:03:25,959 --> 00:03:29,806 that no girl in the world has, let's say, Mamie Dittenfest. 53 00:03:30,224 --> 00:03:32,551 A girl passes, you tip your hat, you say, I beg your 54 00:03:32,592 --> 00:03:34,452 pardon, is your name Mamie Dittenfest? 55 00:03:34,563 --> 00:03:35,919 And she says no. 56 00:03:35,959 --> 00:03:38,652 You say you look like Mamie, she says I'm not Mamie, 57 00:03:38,747 --> 00:03:41,153 and the first thing you know, the girl takes you out to eat. 58 00:03:41,194 --> 00:03:42,201 It's a cinch. 59 00:03:42,242 --> 00:03:43,547 Say, that's an idea, George, 60 00:03:43,588 --> 00:03:45,699 oh by the way here comes a pretty girl now, let's try it. 61 00:03:45,739 --> 00:03:46,802 - Want to try it? - Yeah. 62 00:03:46,845 --> 00:03:47,845 Alright. 63 00:03:54,291 --> 00:03:57,168 I beg your pardon, is your name Mamie Dittenfest? 64 00:03:57,292 --> 00:03:58,913 - Yes! - It is? 65 00:03:59,015 --> 00:04:00,397 Well, uh I'll see ya later. 66 00:04:00,438 --> 00:04:01,586 Well, I'll see ya later. 67 00:04:01,627 --> 00:04:03,511 Oh now wait just a minute, aren't you the fella, 68 00:04:03,552 --> 00:04:05,646 who took me into a restaurant to eat, and aren't you 69 00:04:05,687 --> 00:04:07,846 the fella paid the $2.00 bill? 70 00:04:07,931 --> 00:04:10,119 Well when I left that restaurant I found $10.00 71 00:04:10,159 --> 00:04:11,838 missing out of my handbag. 72 00:04:11,907 --> 00:04:14,952 I'm not saying you took the money, but I wish you'd pay me back. 73 00:04:15,058 --> 00:04:17,497 Well look, just a minute, you have the details all wrong. 74 00:04:17,622 --> 00:04:20,076 The first place, it wasn't a restaurant it was a cafeteria. 75 00:04:20,161 --> 00:04:22,232 Second place the check wasn't $2.00 it was $1.00, 76 00:04:22,321 --> 00:04:24,119 and the third place, you didn't have $10.00 in your 77 00:04:24,159 --> 00:04:25,516 handbag, you only had five. 78 00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:27,515 - I had ten! - Then you owe me five. 79 00:04:27,610 --> 00:04:29,050 Ohhh well, so long. 80 00:04:29,091 --> 00:04:31,342 So, look, I tell you what if you wait a little while, 81 00:04:31,383 --> 00:04:33,043 I'll take you home in my car. 82 00:04:33,156 --> 00:04:35,651 You know when any goof ever asks me where 83 00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:37,610 I live I always tell him I live in the country. 84 00:04:37,701 --> 00:04:39,696 - Oh where do you live? - In the country. 85 00:04:41,021 --> 00:04:42,308 - Well so long. - So long. 86 00:04:42,349 --> 00:04:43,541 Where are you going now? 87 00:04:43,582 --> 00:04:45,602 Well I'm going over to my sister's home. 88 00:04:45,643 --> 00:04:47,146 That's funny, you know where I was going? 89 00:04:47,186 --> 00:04:48,585 - No. - My brother's home. 90 00:04:48,626 --> 00:04:50,576 Now look, when you get to your sister's home, you 91 00:04:50,659 --> 00:04:52,178 phone my brother's home. 92 00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:54,302 Yeah, my sister hasn't got a phone. 93 00:04:54,343 --> 00:04:56,295 That's funny, my brother hasn't got a home. 94 00:04:56,336 --> 00:04:58,356 Oh, you're silly. 95 00:04:58,583 --> 00:05:00,016 - Well so long. - So long. 96 00:05:00,109 --> 00:05:02,667 - So long. - So long. 97 00:05:02,832 --> 00:05:04,159 Oh, you're silly. 98 00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:07,521 - Alright I'll be silly then be dizzy. - Yeah, well I know I'm dizzy. 99 00:05:07,562 --> 00:05:10,734 That's why you, I like you because you're a nice little dizzy girl. 100 00:05:10,807 --> 00:05:12,700 Yeah I know I'm dizzy, I'm glad I'm dizzy. 101 00:05:12,792 --> 00:05:14,885 You're the only dizzy girl that I know that's 102 00:05:14,925 --> 00:05:16,127 glad she's dizzy. 103 00:05:16,168 --> 00:05:18,672 Yeah, I'm glad I'm a dizzy girl because boys like 104 00:05:18,713 --> 00:05:20,309 dizzy girls and I like boys. 105 00:05:20,415 --> 00:05:22,349 Well I'm glad it's over, I'm glad it's finished. 106 00:05:22,390 --> 00:05:24,456 - I'm glad I'm dizzy. - I'm glad you're dizzy. 107 00:05:24,512 --> 00:05:25,906 I'm very glad I'm dizzy. 108 00:05:25,981 --> 00:05:27,997 I'm very glad that you're glad you're dizzy. 109 00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:30,313 Oh I'm very glad you're glad I'm glad I'm dizzy. 110 00:05:30,379 --> 00:05:32,906 Oh let's look let's forget the whole thing, let's 111 00:05:32,981 --> 00:05:35,174 talk of some-say there's the peanut vendor. 112 00:05:35,292 --> 00:05:38,145 Oh that's not the peanut vendor, it goes like this... 113 00:05:41,165 --> 00:05:43,232 That, that's Marquita. 114 00:05:43,344 --> 00:05:44,918 Oh, certainly a surprise to me. 115 00:05:44,984 --> 00:05:46,478 I'll buy ya some peanuts. 116 00:05:47,338 --> 00:05:48,338 Thanks. 117 00:05:48,455 --> 00:05:50,481 Well, there you are, there's some peanuts for ya. 118 00:05:50,608 --> 00:05:52,174 Alright, thank you. 119 00:05:53,883 --> 00:05:55,910 Well what are you giving the baby, the baby 120 00:05:55,959 --> 00:05:57,763 is crying why are you giving it peanuts? 121 00:05:57,804 --> 00:05:59,985 Well I don't know why it should cry, I like peanuts. 122 00:06:00,038 --> 00:06:02,084 You like peanuts, that's no way to stop the baby, 123 00:06:02,125 --> 00:06:03,685 I'll show you how to stop the baby from crying. 124 00:06:03,725 --> 00:06:04,638 Yeah how? 125 00:06:04,679 --> 00:06:06,118 Well just watch me I'll show you. 126 00:06:06,168 --> 00:06:08,955 - What are you gonna do with that? - Well, will you leave this to me? 127 00:06:08,996 --> 00:06:10,112 Yeah but. 128 00:06:10,173 --> 00:06:12,175 I haven't done it in years, now let me see, that's 129 00:06:12,260 --> 00:06:14,247 once over and then this way. 130 00:06:14,323 --> 00:06:15,483 That's not the way. 131 00:06:15,559 --> 00:06:16,600 It isn't is it? 132 00:06:16,666 --> 00:06:20,055 I'll just, now there, and then up and then you turn it 133 00:06:20,096 --> 00:06:22,772 over and then, there it is, now you take your hat off 134 00:06:22,813 --> 00:06:24,924 and you put it on and you're a clown. 135 00:06:25,837 --> 00:06:27,937 Well there you are, see how it's done? 136 00:06:27,978 --> 00:06:28,651 Yeah. 137 00:06:28,692 --> 00:06:30,085 I bet you were a cute baby. 138 00:06:30,174 --> 00:06:32,279 Well I'll tell you something that might surprise you, 139 00:06:32,338 --> 00:06:34,551 when I was a baby I was very young. 140 00:06:34,837 --> 00:06:35,940 - Is that so? - Yes. 141 00:06:35,981 --> 00:06:37,511 - Well look. - What's that? 142 00:06:37,612 --> 00:06:39,169 - Surprise. - Oh. 143 00:06:40,778 --> 00:06:43,277 You know I haven't been in Buffalo since I was a baby. 144 00:06:43,504 --> 00:06:44,606 - Is that so? - No. 145 00:06:44,647 --> 00:06:47,140 You know a very funny thing happened to my mother in Buffalo? 146 00:06:47,228 --> 00:06:50,004 Oh yeah, I thought you were born in Detroit. 147 00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:53,593 In Detroit, say, what street were you born on? 148 00:06:53,738 --> 00:06:55,952 I wasn't born in the street, I was born in a hospital. 149 00:06:56,272 --> 00:06:57,740 - In the hospital? - Yeah. 150 00:06:57,813 --> 00:06:59,155 What's the matter were you sick? 151 00:06:59,196 --> 00:07:02,251 Oh me sick, oh no, I wanted to be near my mother. 152 00:07:02,514 --> 00:07:04,626 Near your mother, that's very good. 153 00:07:04,667 --> 00:07:06,719 - So how old is this baby? - Oh six months. 154 00:07:07,097 --> 00:07:08,097 Six months? 155 00:07:08,738 --> 00:07:10,208 Looks like six years. 156 00:07:10,249 --> 00:07:12,219 Yeah well you see the baby worries a lot. 157 00:07:13,090 --> 00:07:14,601 - The baby worries? - Yeah! 158 00:07:14,642 --> 00:07:16,667 What does a little baby like that got to worry about? 159 00:07:16,707 --> 00:07:18,501 Well he worries over his mother and father, 160 00:07:18,542 --> 00:07:20,503 you see they're always fighting. 161 00:07:20,544 --> 00:07:22,585 The mother insists that the baby looks like the father 162 00:07:22,625 --> 00:07:25,053 and the father insists that the baby looks like mother 163 00:07:25,094 --> 00:07:26,939 and the baby's worried because it doesn't want to 164 00:07:26,979 --> 00:07:28,475 look like either one of them. 165 00:07:28,516 --> 00:07:30,219 Come, let's get some peanuts. 166 00:07:30,259 --> 00:07:31,485 Oh I don't want any more. 167 00:07:31,525 --> 00:07:34,052 - Double order please. - Oh I couldn't have any more. 168 00:07:34,127 --> 00:07:36,271 Well go on, just have it and 169 00:07:36,368 --> 00:07:37,862 I'll save this for you later. 170 00:07:40,522 --> 00:07:43,182 Oh there goes that baby again. 171 00:07:43,413 --> 00:07:45,691 Oh I know what it is, it's feeding time. 172 00:07:46,338 --> 00:07:48,685 - Right temperature? - Yeah, that's the right temperature. 173 00:07:48,726 --> 00:07:49,832 So the baby likes milk. 174 00:07:49,873 --> 00:07:51,971 - Yeah it's funny, I don't like milk. - You don't like milk? 175 00:07:52,011 --> 00:07:53,409 - I like peanuts. - You like peanuts. 176 00:07:53,449 --> 00:07:56,073 Yeah, certainly is a small world isn't it? 177 00:07:56,185 --> 00:07:57,853 I think so. 178 00:07:57,894 --> 00:07:59,751 Say oh, I can't go any further than this. 179 00:07:59,792 --> 00:08:01,785 - Well let's turn around. - We've gotta go around. 180 00:08:01,825 --> 00:08:03,685 You turn around first and I'll turn around. 181 00:08:03,725 --> 00:08:05,319 Do you come out every day? 182 00:08:05,359 --> 00:08:07,705 - Oh yes, every day. - Do you really? 183 00:08:08,461 --> 00:08:10,233 I think that's nice. 184 00:08:10,325 --> 00:08:11,352 Hello Mary! 185 00:08:11,461 --> 00:08:12,861 Oh hello Harry! 186 00:08:14,359 --> 00:08:17,046 Oh uh, system is great, much obliged. 187 00:08:17,136 --> 00:08:18,790 Oh, don't mention it Harry. 188 00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:23,869 My wife! 189 00:08:25,535 --> 00:08:27,035 Come on home Mary. 190 00:08:30,456 --> 00:08:31,543 Thanks for the system. 191 00:08:31,637 --> 00:08:34,016 Oh don't mention it, it always works you know. 192 00:08:35,310 --> 00:08:37,328 - Well I guess the system was bad. - Yes. 193 00:08:37,369 --> 00:08:38,949 So what does your boss do for a living? 194 00:08:38,990 --> 00:08:40,598 Well my brother's a detective. 195 00:08:40,639 --> 00:08:41,805 Your brother's a detective? 196 00:08:41,846 --> 00:08:44,062 Yeah he went out on a job last week, a murder case 197 00:08:44,103 --> 00:08:45,752 and he got his man within an hour. 198 00:08:46,068 --> 00:08:48,494 - Who the murderer? - No, the man who was killed. 199 00:08:48,773 --> 00:08:51,640 Well look, let's sit down and talk about your brother, 200 00:08:51,709 --> 00:08:52,912 I'll bet he's interesting. 201 00:08:53,039 --> 00:08:55,468 Oh, interesting, well wait til I tell you this. 202 00:08:55,689 --> 00:08:57,818 Last week he caught a bootlegger sellin' liquor and 203 00:08:57,859 --> 00:08:59,084 what do you think he did? 204 00:08:59,406 --> 00:09:02,760 - Gave him $9 a quart. - Yeah and the liquor was bad too. 205 00:09:02,784 --> 00:09:03,654 Was cut yeah? 206 00:09:03,695 --> 00:09:05,750 Yeah, and I'll tell you something else. 207 00:09:05,792 --> 00:09:08,011 You know Mr. and Mrs. Jones, my brother's neighbors 208 00:09:08,052 --> 00:09:09,583 are having matrimonial troubles. 209 00:09:09,624 --> 00:09:10,688 Yes tell me. 210 00:09:10,729 --> 00:09:14,031 Yeah so Mr. Jones hired my brother to watch Mrs. Jones, 211 00:09:14,098 --> 00:09:16,361 so he's been watching her now for about two months. 212 00:09:16,402 --> 00:09:19,298 - Well what happened? - Well, she finally got a divorce. 213 00:09:19,779 --> 00:09:22,263 - Mrs. Jones. - No, my brother's wife. 214 00:09:23,260 --> 00:09:24,680 - Your brother's wife! - Yeah. 215 00:09:24,721 --> 00:09:26,405 Well, what's your brother's wife doing now? 216 00:09:26,472 --> 00:09:28,571 Well, she married Mr. Jones. 217 00:09:29,884 --> 00:09:31,278 Boy you're dizzy I mean I... 218 00:09:31,319 --> 00:09:33,214 Oh well I know I'm dizzy, I'm glad I'm dizzy. 219 00:09:33,255 --> 00:09:36,727 Now wait a minute, you're not going to start that again. 220 00:09:37,005 --> 00:09:39,045 What do I look like, do I look like a fool? 221 00:09:39,116 --> 00:09:41,502 Oh George, you're self-conscious. 222 00:09:42,472 --> 00:09:44,363 - Say, that's pretty cute. - You like it? 223 00:09:44,485 --> 00:09:47,094 - I'm going to give you a little kiss. - Oh well you better not! 224 00:09:47,135 --> 00:09:48,188 You see this? 225 00:09:48,229 --> 00:09:51,730 That's a policeman's whistle, that's if fellas get fresh or try to kiss me 226 00:09:51,771 --> 00:09:53,378 I blow that and the policeman comes. 227 00:09:53,436 --> 00:09:55,449 - And the policeman comes? - Yeah. 228 00:09:55,684 --> 00:09:57,179 Well go on and call the policeman. 229 00:09:57,220 --> 00:09:59,998 Well you're pretty lucky it's broken from last night. 230 00:10:00,693 --> 00:10:02,910 I'll bet I'm the first fella that every kissed you. 231 00:10:02,951 --> 00:10:04,705 - Oh you are. - I believe it too. 232 00:10:04,746 --> 00:10:07,183 Yeah and you're the first fella that ever believed it too. 233 00:10:07,439 --> 00:10:09,524 - Say, that's good too. - You like that too. 234 00:10:09,565 --> 00:10:12,569 - I'm gonna give you another kiss. - Yeah if you do I'll slap your face. 235 00:10:13,599 --> 00:10:15,582 And that goes for me too. 17201

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