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I hope that you won't think that I'm prying into your personal life.

But it has been called to my attention

that there is an increasing domestic unrest

in this country.

Now by domestic unrest, I mean that husbands

and wives seem to be getting on each other's nerves.

Nothing personal, of course.

Here in the laboratory, we have been working on this problem.

And today we want to take up what we call the women's angle

in this war of nerves and show a few of the small things which

husbands do which can irritate wives

to the point of whatever that point is just

before a woman kills a man.

Now, here is an example of a very common trick

among husbands which is known as the delayed ablutions

trick, in which the husband waits

until dinner is ready before getting ready for dinner.

- Are you ready for dinner? - Ready and waiting, honey.

What's cooking?

You'll see. It's a surprise.

This man has just come home from work.

He's a good man and mean swell and during this half

hour before dinner, tries to keep his wife

informed on world affairs.

Listen to this.

It's from Carapuxit, Idaho.

Returning from church yesterday morning, Jasper Arthur,

97-year-old Carapuxit farmer, saw something gleaming

at the side of the road.

Stooping to pick it up, Arthur broke three ribs

but recovered a silver spoon lost by him as a child

nearly a century ago.

Hey, look at that.

Soup's on.

Come and get it.

I'll be right there.

We need hardly say that this action

is ill advised at this time.

Among the 35,000 wives questioned in our survey,

84% agreed that the husband’s waiting to clean up

until dinner is on the table is one of the greatest

causes of domestic unrest.

Dinner is ready, Joe.

What are you doing?

I'll be right down.

We found in our survey that at this point

a great many women are tempted to put poison

into the next plate of soup, which

may account for the prevalence of indigestion

among married men.

Here we are.

Oh, clam chowder.

Cold, though.

What have I done?

Now here's a case of domestic economy

which is neither domestic nor economical.

And we find it cropping up usually around about supper

time on Sunday nights.

We just need a half a pound of butter, that's all.

The delicatessen will have it.

You see, here it is Sunday night and we have

to buy at the delicatessen.

It cost us twice as much as at the grocery store.

You ought to have a businessman run your household for you.

There'd be no more of this last minute Sunday night delicatessen buying.

- Pound of butter, is that right? - Half a pound of butter.

Half a pound.

Oh, good evening, sir.

What can I do for you?

Well, I just want half a mark.

Well, something very special, almost impossible to get

these days, half sour pickle.

Half sour pickle.

$0.60 a dozen.

- Give me a dozen. - Yes, sir.

Anything else, sir?

Don't tell me.

I didn't know they made them anymore.

I haven't had any of those since I was a kid.

- Give me some of those, boy. - Yes, sir.

You might put in three or four of those pigs feet.

I can eat three myself.

What's this?

Some sort of new way of doing up bacon?

What do you know about that?

Put one of those in.

Plenty of onion in that potato salad?

Give me a, you know, just a portion of it.

OK.

You might put in some of that pickle..

Yes. Anything else, sir?

Lobster?

- Is that real fresh lobster? - Absolutely.

- Perfectly safe? - Absolutely.

Say, that looks good.

I'll have some of that, I guess.

Thank you very much.

- And do come back again. - I certainly will, sir.

This is all for just this one family?

Sure. What's wrong?

Nothing's wrong.

Now that we're running on a business basis,

now that we buy at the delicatessen

where they charge twice as much as they do in the grocery

store, no, nothing's wrong, except that you've forgotten

the half a pound of butter.

- Butter? - Is it there?

No.

- Oh, I'll go right and get it. - No, you don't.

- You stay right here. - Never mind.

- We'll do without butter. - You're not going back.

Now, here's a case which we have found in 64%

of the homes investigated.

It is known as the mechanical husband, or the handyman

about the house.

Excuse me.

Where do you keep the screwdriver?

Right over in the drawer where it always is.

What do you want with the screwdriver?

I'm going to put up that shelf for you.

Well, do you have to do it right this minute?

All I hear for the past two weeks

is when are you going to put up the shelf in the kitchen.

Now I'm ready, and you don't want me to do it.

Yeah, I do want you to do it. I'll be out of here in a minute.

Where is it?

That's a pretty funny looking screw driver.

New?

We've had it for eight years. And you bought it.

Is that so?

- Where do you want it put? - Right up there.

I just want to put the clock on it.

Okie doke.

Okie doke.

- Where are the screws? - Up on the top shelf in the closet.

- Right up there. - Up here?

These the ones?

You ought to know.

You are the one who's putting up the shelf.

Or are you?

Why don't we get some of those new ones, you know?

The ones you just push into the wall and a vacuum or something

holds it in.

You know what I mean?

Those are the only screws we've got.

What on Earth are you putting those on for?

Just a little precaution.

Better to be safe than sorry, you know.

And now,.

Excuse me. Sorry.

- What is it now? - Just the brackets.

Oh, I brought them home last night.

What are you going to do?

Build an extension on the kitchen?

When I do a job, I do it right.

Don't you bother your pretty head.

You've got my pretty head to aching already.

I don't think I can watch it if you don't mind.

It's better that you don't.

This is going to be no place for a woman.

Ouch!

Well, it's up.

- What have you done to your arm? - Oh, just a little cut.

Well, how in the world did you cut yourself way up there?

Those darn old fashioned screws, I told you

they were were no good.

- I'll get some bandage. - No, no.

I'll take care of it myself.

Come out and see if it's the way you want it.

Did you want to put anything on it but the clock?

I think it looks kind of cute as it is.

Well, I think most of the wives in the audience

have recognized these little items which we've enumerated.

Hello?

Hello, dear.

Yes, I'm almost through.

Yeah, I'll be home in about half an hour.

Oh, sure. I'll be home for dinner.

Yeah, just a minute.

Hold the line just a minute, will you please?

Well, I think we've covered pretty

well the woman's anger over these little domestic scenes.

Probably could go on like this all right.

I'm sure most of the ladies in the audience

could furnish me with hundreds of other cases.

And remember men, next week we take up the men's angle.

And I expect a full attendance.

And it wouldn't hurt some of you ladies

to drop in, maybe and see one or two of the little things

you do that irritate us.