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In the good old summer time

In the good old summer time

That's a very good sign

In the good old summer time

In the good old summer time

- Mother. --You could all come--

Mother!

Come here.

Come here. Now listen.

Don't try to tell me that that's sugar.

I just found out that for two years,

I've been drinking my coffee with salt in it.

And I'm telling you it's sugar.

I've been cooking for 25 years, and I

certainly ought to know the difference between salt and sugar.

What's the trouble?

Mother says this is sugar, and I say it's salt.

Ah, let's see.

- What do you think? - You're both right.

- It's flour. - See?

What did I tell you?

Grace, what are you doing with that?

Oh, I just took the screen off the window

to let the flies out of the room.

Far it from me be-- no, no.

Fi-- far it-- be--

Quiet, John.

Quiet Grace, dear.

The landlord said he's going to raise the rent.

Ooh, mother, did you thank him?

You know, father's been trying to raise the rent all month and couldn't.

- What would you like for breakfast? - Well, first I'll have my coffee.

And then my toast, and then my eggs, then

my bacon, then my orange juice.

Well, you're having your breakfast backwards.

Yeah, I know. My stomach is upset.

Come on, dear. You have to hurry.

You'll be late for work.

And mother, I think she ought to have a sweater.

No, I don't need a sweater.

- Don't forget your umbrella. - No, I've got my umbrella.

And look out for the taxis.

Yes, and be careful. And be sure to phone me.

You know how I worry.

Oh, mother, don't I always phone you?

I know you do, dear.

--Promise not to phone you.

- Bye-bye, dear. - Goodbye, darling.

Goodbye. I'll see you later.

- Good morning. - Oh, good morning, Miss Allen.

I know, but I'll worry till I hear that she's all right.

That poor dear baby of mine.

What will I do? There, there.

Oh, no matter.

Hello?

Ravingswood 88-0000.

- Hello? - Hello, mother?

Yes, dear.

- Well, I just made it, mother. - Oh, I'm so glad, dear.

- Look how good? - Huh, dear?

- Yeah, how's daddy? - Oh, he's fine, dear.

Oh, that's good. He's feeling better, huh?

- Yes, dear. - All right.

- Wells I'll see you later, mother. - Yes, darling.

- Goodbye. - Goodbye, darling.

You sure this is all the murder stories you got?

I'm sorry, but this is all at present.

Eh.

Well, then they're all good murders, huh?

They're all marvelous. Excellent, really.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, the last book I bought, there was only 12 people

killed in the first chapter, and that's no good.

12, huh?

Why, in these books there are 15 to 20 murders on every page.

- You'll be surprised. - Oh, well that's much better, yes.

Well, Hector, that fixes you up, and thank you very much, old man.

Now, come in next week.

We're liable to have some marvelous books in next week.

Yeah, you bet I will. Goodbye.

Come right in. Sure, anytime.

Thanks very much.

Well, go ahead and be comical now.

Ask me if I got a match.

Well, have you got a match?

Sure.

- There you are. - Thanks very much.

It's awfully nice of you. If you got a match.

Well, what is that?

- Something I can do for you? - Yes, there's a match for you.

Thanks very much.

My name is George Burns. I suppose your name is Sam Smith.

- How'd you guess it? - I looked at the window.

It said proprietor Tom Jones, so immediately I

knew that you were Sam Smith.

Well, you're right. My name's Al Brown.

Glad to meet you, Mr. Davis.

- Pleasure to know you. - Now, what can I do for you?

Well, I'd like to buy a true story

book with all the trimmings.

How would you like The Life of Victor Young?

I wouldn't like anybody's life. I'd like to buy a book and go home.

Miss Allen will take care of you, and--

Miss Allen, will you take care of George Burns?

- Oh, certainly. - Thanks very much.

Mr. Newman, would you tell the taxicab I'll be right out?

- Pleasure. - Thank you.

Miss Allen?

Oh, I'm sorry if I was late, but I fell.

Well, I'm sorry to hear that. Did you hurt yourself?

Oh, no. I fell asleep.

- You fell asleep? - Yes.

That's fine. Well, I'd like a book.

Hey. Hey.

Your bill is $1.

I'll be right out. Wait for me outside.

$1.

Look, Miss Allen, I'd like to buy a book. And what would you advise?

Would you advise the old writers or would you advise the new writers?

Oh, I'd advise the old writers.

You see, my brother had new writers

and it was very painful.

- New writers? - Yes.

That last joke was a little painful, too.

But my father cured my brother.

- Your father? - Yes.

- Well, how is your father? - My father?

Oh, he's all right, if you like fathers.

- If you like fathers? - Yeah.

Well, don't you like your father?

Well, I'm a little like this.

- Ooh, a little like that? - Yeah.

What's the matter with him?

Well, you know, I think that father drinks a little.

- You think your father drinks? - Yeah.

He came home last night and he had a black eye,

he punched my brothers, he broke a mirror, he fell down

and he laid there.

Kind of hinting that he was drinking.

Yeah.

I went over to my mother and I says Mama,

I think Papa's drunk.

- I'll bet your mother was surprised. - Yeah.

She thought he was dead.

Mm.

What did your brothers say?

Yeah-- oh my br-- Oh, they didn't say anything.

You see, they're twins.

They didn't say anything, they're twins?

Yeah, only-- only Joe hasn't got a wooden leg.

Oh, this is going to be all right.

Joe hasn't got a wooden leg?

And Harry has.

- Harry has? - Yeah.

My mother has a cute little way of telling them apart.

I'll bet she has.

She kicks Joe in the leg, and if he hollers ouch, it's Harry.

Hm.

Hey. Your bill is $2.

I'll see you outside.

That taxicab driver thinks he's not going to be paid,

and he's right.

Look, miss, I'm in a hurry. A book, please.

- I'd like to go. - Let's see.

Oh, how would you like a book about a dog?

No, I'm not interested in dogs.

I don't know.

Well, you know, my brother Harry has a police dog for protection

from robbers.

- You don't say. - Yeah.

And last week a robber got in the house and the dog bit Harry.

- The dog bit Harry? - Yes.

I'll bet the dog died.

Yeah, he did.

I was afraid of that.

You know, I always thought that a police dog was a one-man dog.

Yeah, but Harry wasn't the man.

Harry wasn't the man.

I'll bet you can tell them about now since Harry has that bite.

Oh, no. The twins still look alike.

Well, they look so much alike people take them for triplets.

People take them for triplets? Yes.

Wish the cab driver would take me out of here.

How could twins be taken for triplets?

Oh, well, you see, my brother Joe is two-faced.

Your brother Joe is two--

I suppose you know what you're talking about.

Well, certainly I know what I'm talking about.

Far be me from it not to know what I'm talking about.

Just a minute. One minute.

What did you say?

I said far be me from it not to know what I'm--

No, no, no. Not far be me from it.

You mean far be it--

far-- just a minute.

Far-- Yeah.

Far be me from it.

Well, you know, for a minute, I thought you were wrong.

I mean, it's silly of me.

I'll bet that you have a lot of sisters and brothers.

I have a lot of sisters and brothers. How'd you guess?

Well, I figure anybody that makes one mistake

makes a whole lot of mistakes. That's my own idea.

Oh, you're silly.

Say, how would you like a book about a desert?

- A desert? - Yes.

- How do you know it's about a desert? - Well, look at the sand.

Well, look.

Between the jokes in here and the cab driver outside,

I'll probably die laughing.

Yeah.

Sand in the book was one of my brother Harry's jokes.

I suppose your brother Harry was one of your father's jokes?

Yeah. There you go again.

- Here's a book on London right here. - Oh, would you like that on London?

Well, I don't know.

Do you really think that London is the foggiest place in the world?

Oh, no, no. I was to a place much foggier.

- Is that so? - Yes.

Where's that?

Well, it was so foggy I couldn't see where it was.

Hmm.

I'll bet you have trouble seeing with your eyes open.

Yes, I have.

Hey.

The bill is $3.

How much is that taxi?

$3.

That's a very good buy for $3.

Did you say goodbye?

Yes.

Goodbye, goodbye.

I'll see you outside.

Silly talk.

Say, here's a lovely book.

- What's-- what's the name of that? - The Last Days Of Pompeii.

- The Last Days Of Pompeii? - Yes.

- Well, what did he die from? - Yeah, well, I don't know.

I think it was an eruption.

- You think it was an eruption? - Yeah.

I don't think I like that. The covers are too far apart.

Oh, well, we can easily fix that.

Look.

There, that's better, isn't it?

Yeah, well, that's a little better.

- How much is that? - Well, that's $6.

- $6? - Yes.

I haven't got $5.

I've only got between $18 and $20.

Oh, then you have $5.

No, I have between $18 and $20.

I have $2.

Oh, no. I couldn't sell it for $2.

Well, look at the leather and look at the gold letters and everything.

Well, all right.

Then we can't do any business, that's all.

- I mean, it's a-- - Well, now, look.

Maybe we can.

Supposing you take it without the cover.

Would that help?

- Without the cover? - Yes.

Well, I don't know.

You see, I always read a book before I buy it,

and then I don't buy it. I mean, that's--

Oh, well, I can help you out there.

Now look. You take a page home, and if you like it, come back

and we'll do business.

Is that really a good book?

Oh, the finish is marvelous.

- The finish? - Yeah.

Well, what-- what about the beginning?

Well, I don't know. I'm not up that far.

- You're not up that far. - No.

Hey.

- Your bill is $4. - $4?

Well, just a minute. I'll pay and get rid of you.

Look, I don't want to leave without buying something.

I'll give you $1 for the book.

Well, yeah, all right. I'll take $1.

All right, fine. I've got $1 here.

I'll-- just hold this a minute, will you?

I'm sure I have $1. Oh, there it is.

There it is. No, no.

That's a five.

Well, that's all right. You give me $4 change.

And you keep a dollar and and I'll give you the four.

- All right. - All right.

Now just a minute. Now just give me four.

That's it.

That's $1 for the book, and four for me, and four to you.

That evens us up.

And I'm sure I had $1 someplace.

Ooh, ooh, there's the dollar.

There's the dollar. Now give me back my five, please.

I found my dollar.

- Isn't that lucky? - Yes.

- Oh, I should say. - I was lucky to find that.

Thanks very much.

That squares us.

Oops, I think he's been cheated.

You say cheated?

Cheated? I said cheated?

Oh, I wouldn't cheat anybody.

Far be me from it. I couldn't cheat anyone--

Now just a minute.

We had that same trouble over there.

It isn't far-- it's far from it be me to it.

- Oh, no, you're wrong. - Say, governor.

You're both wrong.

It's far be it from me.

Look, stick to the cab.

Go, go.

It's far from it--

- Far be me from it. - Now just a minute.

Let me-- It's far from-- Just a minute.

Just a minute.

What you mean is, far from it be me.

Ha! He's even worse--

Just-- it's far-- he's-- wait a minute.

It's far be it from me, to it--

Just-- just a minute.

It's far from it be it.

Wrong again.

Now just-- please, just a minute, now.

I don't want to butt in here, but that expression

is far it from me be.

- That's your father. - Yeah, how'd you guess?

I thought so. It's far from it--

Now listen, I know the man who invented the--