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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:30,739 --> 00:00:32,615 Your husband saw them 2 00:00:32,699 --> 00:00:34,451 take a baby out of there. 3 00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:36,953 And now he needs help. 4 00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:40,957 Side effects may include dry mouth, 5 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:44,377 fatigue, headaches, rage, melancholy... 6 00:00:44,461 --> 00:00:47,005 Go to your assigned fulfillment center 7 00:00:47,088 --> 00:00:49,288 to receive your family's EGG. 8 00:00:49,340 --> 00:00:50,675 Bring it home, 9 00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:53,011 and let us take care of the rest. 10 00:00:56,055 --> 00:01:00,018 And this time it will be okay forever. 11 00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:30,548 Goddamn it. 12 00:02:25,144 --> 00:02:27,397 What do you mean, you're losing time? 13 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:30,441 You, like, blacking out completely or 14 00:02:30,525 --> 00:02:32,193 I don't know... browning out? 15 00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:37,240 You don't think it could be odorless, do you? 16 00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:40,577 Or could you be, like... I don't know... fainting? 17 00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:43,788 I used to faint kind of all the time in college. 18 00:02:43,872 --> 00:02:46,791 No, no, no, I'm whooshing lightly. 19 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,585 Fainting is down. 20 00:02:48,668 --> 00:02:51,045 This is up, like a-a floating. 21 00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:54,215 A... a whooshing floating. 22 00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:56,426 And it's happened more than once? 23 00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:59,429 It happens at regular intervals. 24 00:02:59,512 --> 00:03:04,058 I'll just be going about my day, and then I hear this music, 25 00:03:04,142 --> 00:03:06,269 a short sequence of chords, 26 00:03:06,352 --> 00:03:10,440 and then a kind of lightness, a whooshing. 27 00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:13,151 And then, all of a sudden, 28 00:03:13,234 --> 00:03:15,570 the next thing I know, I'm waking up. 29 00:03:15,653 --> 00:03:17,238 Up there. 30 00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:19,073 Up in my bedroom. 31 00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:23,953 I used to think your kitchen got better light than mine, 32 00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:25,788 but now I don't think it does. 33 00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:29,292 And you chose these countertops 34 00:03:29,375 --> 00:03:31,961 on purpose or...? 35 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:35,089 God, if I could strike a match 36 00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:37,967 and burn the whole place down, I would. 37 00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:39,886 Start all over again. 38 00:03:41,554 --> 00:03:44,474 Would be something to do. Right? 39 00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:47,810 Unless you think it's a brain tumor. 40 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:49,354 You don't think? 41 00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:52,357 Well, did you call someone to take a look at it? 42 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:55,777 You know, a handyman or whatever his name is. 43 00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:58,446 What is he gonna look at? What is there to see? 44 00:03:58,529 --> 00:04:01,199 It could be odorless and colorless. 45 00:04:01,282 --> 00:04:03,993 Oh, well, what did your phone say about it? 46 00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:07,580 I just. 47 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:11,501 I need you to be here when it happens, 48 00:04:11,584 --> 00:04:13,711 to watch and tell me what happens. 49 00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:15,713 Can you do that? 50 00:04:15,797 --> 00:04:18,841 My allotted fulfillment hour is at 1:00. 51 00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:20,969 Oh. Right. 52 00:04:21,052 --> 00:04:23,388 Do you think I should go to my assigned fulfillment center 53 00:04:23,471 --> 00:04:25,306 at 12:30 or 12:00? 54 00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:27,892 They'll probably put us in a line, I guess. 55 00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:29,894 Is yours earlier? Yours isn't earlier. 56 00:04:29,978 --> 00:04:32,647 No, I-I'm not until 4:00. 57 00:04:32,730 --> 00:04:35,733 4:00? 58 00:04:35,817 --> 00:04:38,653 How do you even begin to wait? 59 00:04:38,736 --> 00:04:41,906 You don't seem excited. Are you excited? 60 00:04:41,990 --> 00:04:45,451 No. I am. I am. 61 00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:48,538 But you do still want it, don't you? 62 00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:50,707 Yes, I... No. 63 00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:53,001 More than anything. 64 00:04:53,084 --> 00:04:54,544 Yeah. 65 00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:56,838 It'll be just like the commercials say. 66 00:04:56,921 --> 00:05:00,174 "Your family's EGG will make everything okay again, 67 00:05:00,258 --> 00:05:03,678 and this time, it'll make everything okay forever." 68 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:08,891 Don't you just wish they'd show it to us? 69 00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:10,893 You know, a peek at this thing 70 00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:13,730 that's supposed to change our lives. 71 00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:16,232 Mm, it'll be so great if it somehow helps 72 00:05:16,315 --> 00:05:20,611 with Xerxes' babysitting anxiety or Xander's biting thing. 73 00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:22,322 Oh. Oh, did Rex end up 74 00:05:22,405 --> 00:05:24,699 liking his medication, or not so much? 75 00:05:24,782 --> 00:05:26,075 Shh! 76 00:05:28,119 --> 00:05:30,038 Hold on. 77 00:05:30,121 --> 00:05:32,165 I think it might... 78 00:05:39,505 --> 00:05:41,424 Submitted for your approval: 79 00:05:41,507 --> 00:05:44,052 Mrs. Janet Warren, 80 00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:46,763 a woman who would seem to have everything. 81 00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:50,266 Every... thing. 82 00:05:50,349 --> 00:05:52,894 But possessions have weight. 83 00:05:52,977 --> 00:05:56,022 We can't carry them all at the same time, 84 00:05:56,105 --> 00:05:59,776 especially when taking an unscheduled trip 85 00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:02,779 into The Twilight Zone. 86 00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:13,474 You're traveling through another dimension, 87 00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:17,502 a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind. 88 00:06:17,585 --> 00:06:20,797 It is the middle ground between light and shadow, 89 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,508 between science and superstition. 90 00:06:23,591 --> 00:06:26,135 And it lies between the pit of one's fears 91 00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:28,971 and the summit of one's knowledge. 92 00:06:29,055 --> 00:06:32,141 You are now traveling through a dimension of imagination. 93 00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:36,104 You've just crossed over into The Twilight Zone. 94 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,321 Ah. 95 00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:49,325 Dad, what's "immolation" mean? 96 00:06:49,408 --> 00:06:51,994 Well 97 00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:54,372 that's certainly a big word. 98 00:06:54,455 --> 00:06:56,999 But I'll tell you. 99 00:06:57,083 --> 00:06:59,502 You remember our neighbor Don Parker? 100 00:07:00,753 --> 00:07:03,297 Well, instead of having a garage sale, 101 00:07:03,381 --> 00:07:05,675 he just lit a match to his house 102 00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:09,470 and burned everything and everyone to the ground. 103 00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:11,514 And that was that... 104 00:07:11,597 --> 00:07:15,643 A fresh, clean start for Don Parker. 105 00:07:15,726 --> 00:07:18,271 But why do you ask, Billy? 106 00:07:18,354 --> 00:07:22,567 Is there something or someone you want to immolate? 107 00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:30,032 Mm. I get it. 108 00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:32,034 I really do. 109 00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:34,203 But we can't all be Don Parker, son. 110 00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:39,333 But, you know, there is a place we can go. 111 00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:42,211 Come on over to 112 00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:46,841 the Immolation Station, where you get to play with matches, 113 00:07:46,924 --> 00:07:49,051 and you get to watch it all burn. 114 00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:50,344 Fire. 115 00:07:50,428 --> 00:07:52,889 - Hey. - Don't forget, 116 00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:56,184 every Wednesday, kids eat free. 117 00:07:58,811 --> 00:08:01,898 It's your EGG, 118 00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:06,903 and you want it more than anything. 119 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:25,922 What happened? 120 00:08:26,005 --> 00:08:28,633 Is this... is this what's happening? 121 00:08:28,716 --> 00:08:30,801 Did you hear the music? 122 00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:36,849 Is this your bedroom? 123 00:08:38,142 --> 00:08:40,519 I like the patterning. It's brave. 124 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:47,193 - How did we get up here? - Join the club. 125 00:08:47,276 --> 00:08:48,736 Did I faint? 126 00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:51,864 Did I hit my head? Did we hit our heads? 127 00:08:54,533 --> 00:08:55,993 What time is it? 128 00:08:56,077 --> 00:08:58,454 Did we...? 129 00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:00,289 I really ought to 130 00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:03,793 get out of here... I-I mean, oh, get going. 131 00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:06,003 I saw the EGG. 132 00:09:06,087 --> 00:09:07,171 Huh? 133 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:09,799 The EGG. 134 00:09:09,882 --> 00:09:13,052 I'm telling you, I saw it. 135 00:09:13,135 --> 00:09:14,470 Oh, well, no. 136 00:09:14,553 --> 00:09:15,888 You couldn't have. 137 00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:17,974 No, you didn't. 138 00:09:19,934 --> 00:09:21,811 What do you mean you just saw it? 139 00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:23,813 Just now? Where? Was I there? 140 00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:26,607 I don't know. It was like I saw it in a commercial, 141 00:09:26,691 --> 00:09:29,151 like a commercial in my head, I guess. 142 00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:33,114 I don't know. I just know that I've seen one. 143 00:09:35,741 --> 00:09:37,326 It's ugly. 144 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:38,953 Ugly, no. 145 00:09:40,746 --> 00:09:42,540 Yeah, I doubt that very much. 146 00:09:42,623 --> 00:09:44,333 They wouldn't go to all the trouble 147 00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:46,335 to design and make something 148 00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:49,630 that's, you know, that's for all of us, 149 00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:53,634 that will be the centerpiece for every American home, 150 00:09:53,718 --> 00:09:55,469 and then make it ugly. 151 00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:57,179 No. 152 00:09:57,263 --> 00:09:59,181 But don't you see 153 00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:03,352 that none of us even knows what it is or what it does? 154 00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:05,354 Don't you think it's strange 155 00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:08,357 that all we know is that we have to have one, 156 00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:10,526 everyone has to have one? 157 00:10:10,609 --> 00:10:11,878 Strange? What makes it so strange? 158 00:10:11,902 --> 00:10:16,365 What if it has something to do with whatever's happening to me? 159 00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:18,743 The EGG. 160 00:10:18,826 --> 00:10:23,039 What if it has something to do with whatever's happening to us? 161 00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:24,665 Oh, no. 162 00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:28,044 No, no, no. 163 00:10:28,127 --> 00:10:32,006 Don't include me in whatever is happening here with you. 164 00:10:32,089 --> 00:10:35,051 I just came over here as a good neighbor to see 165 00:10:35,134 --> 00:10:37,219 if there's anything I can do to help you. 166 00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:42,266 We might have a lot of the same things, 167 00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:45,436 but we don't have the same problems. 168 00:10:45,519 --> 00:10:47,897 We just woke up on my bed 169 00:10:47,980 --> 00:10:49,899 with our shoes on. 170 00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:51,734 I have a twig in my hair. 171 00:10:51,817 --> 00:10:53,569 That wasn't there when you came in 172 00:10:53,652 --> 00:10:55,946 and we were talking earlier, was it? 173 00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:59,450 I-I don't know if it was there or if it wasn't. 174 00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:01,369 I just know that 175 00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:03,638 my hour of fulfillment is gonna be here before I know it, 176 00:11:03,662 --> 00:11:05,915 and I really ought to be home, so... 177 00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:07,416 Thank you. 178 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:08,584 Okay. 179 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,544 No! Wait! 180 00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:11,921 Are you touching me? 181 00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:13,631 What if they're connected? 182 00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:16,258 The EGG and the... the rushing, rising whooshing? 183 00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:17,593 Ow! You're hurting me. 184 00:11:17,676 --> 00:11:19,553 Something is happening here, 185 00:11:19,637 --> 00:11:22,306 and you don't know what it is, either, do you, Mrs. Jones? 186 00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:23,992 I just want to be at my fulfillment center 187 00:11:24,016 --> 00:11:25,702 at my fulfillment hour to collect my family's EGG 188 00:11:25,726 --> 00:11:27,937 - like a normal person. - No! 189 00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:32,608 No! 190 00:11:36,070 --> 00:11:37,947 We do not have the same problems! 191 00:12:08,227 --> 00:12:10,080 Dick Warren's office. 192 00:12:10,104 --> 00:12:11,647 This is Meghan. 193 00:12:11,730 --> 00:12:13,816 Hi, Meghan. It's Jane. 194 00:12:13,899 --> 00:12:15,609 Is my husband there? 195 00:12:15,693 --> 00:12:18,154 Hi there, Mrs. Warren. I'm so sorry. 196 00:12:18,237 --> 00:12:20,156 Mr. Warren is in a meeting. 197 00:12:20,239 --> 00:12:22,450 Is there a message you'd like me to give him? 198 00:12:22,533 --> 00:12:25,870 Oh, honestly, Meghan, I can't imagine. 199 00:12:25,953 --> 00:12:28,205 He did want to make sure 200 00:12:28,289 --> 00:12:31,000 that I remind you that your allotted hour 201 00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:32,460 of fulfillment is 4:00 p.m... 202 00:12:32,543 --> 00:12:34,295 Uh-huh. Yeah, I know. 203 00:12:34,378 --> 00:12:36,505 You don't seem excited, Mrs. Warren. 204 00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:38,349 Aren't you excited? 205 00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:41,969 Tell me something, Meghan. 206 00:12:42,052 --> 00:12:45,181 Why do you want your family's EGG? 207 00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:47,641 Uh... because 208 00:12:47,725 --> 00:12:49,977 it's coming out? 209 00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:52,688 Of course, but... 210 00:12:52,771 --> 00:12:54,982 But you don't have a family. 211 00:12:55,065 --> 00:12:56,984 Do you? 212 00:12:57,067 --> 00:13:00,196 No, but I do want everything to be okay again. 213 00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:03,240 And this time for it to be okay forever. 214 00:13:03,324 --> 00:13:06,035 Because things aren't okay for you. 215 00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:08,329 Oh, for me? Things are cool. 216 00:13:08,412 --> 00:13:12,166 But, like, for the world world out there, outside of me? 217 00:13:12,249 --> 00:13:14,168 Outside of you, sure. 218 00:13:14,251 --> 00:13:18,923 Um, Mrs. Warren, things are really, definitely not, 219 00:13:19,006 --> 00:13:20,841 like, in the world world. 220 00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:22,718 So definitely not okay. 221 00:13:22,801 --> 00:13:25,054 Like, not at all, not at all. 222 00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:28,891 I mean, have you seen what all these human beings are doing? 223 00:13:28,974 --> 00:13:31,060 Interesting. 224 00:13:31,143 --> 00:13:34,438 So you think it's something for the whole planet? 225 00:13:34,522 --> 00:13:37,441 Don't you think it'd better be, Mrs. Warren? 226 00:13:39,318 --> 00:13:41,612 Um, Mrs. Warren? 227 00:13:41,695 --> 00:13:44,573 Hmm. 228 00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:46,843 Welcome to the EGG Customer Service Center. 229 00:13:46,867 --> 00:13:48,536 Operator. 230 00:13:48,619 --> 00:13:50,096 Please listen to the following options. 231 00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:51,914 - Operator. - If you'd like to confirm 232 00:13:51,997 --> 00:13:54,208 your hour of fulfillment, please press one. 233 00:13:54,291 --> 00:13:57,378 - Human being. - If you've lost your registration card, 234 00:13:57,461 --> 00:14:00,047 - please press two. - Real human being. 235 00:14:00,130 --> 00:14:02,216 If you need to change the pickup location 236 00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:03,926 - of your EGG... - Supervisor. 237 00:14:04,009 --> 00:14:07,346 Okay. Supervisor. Hello. How may we help you? 238 00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:09,306 Yes, yes, hello. 239 00:14:09,390 --> 00:14:11,559 Hi. Thank you. 240 00:14:11,642 --> 00:14:14,436 Uh, yes, uh, well, I was hoping 241 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:18,774 I could talk to someone about, you know, the EGG. 242 00:14:18,857 --> 00:14:21,694 I was hoping there might be someone there 243 00:14:21,777 --> 00:14:23,737 that could tell me just a little bit more about, 244 00:14:23,821 --> 00:14:26,490 you know, what it is, what it does. 245 00:14:26,574 --> 00:14:28,450 What it is. 246 00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:31,954 Okay, I'll transfer you now. 247 00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:33,789 No, no, I don't want to be tra... 248 00:14:51,849 --> 00:14:53,142 Marge. 249 00:14:53,225 --> 00:14:54,865 God, everything's gonna be okay this time. 250 00:14:54,893 --> 00:14:55,978 It's gonna be okay forever. 251 00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:57,813 Oh. 252 00:14:57,896 --> 00:14:58,939 Marge Stevens. 253 00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:00,023 What? What? 254 00:15:01,609 --> 00:15:02,985 You got your EGG. 255 00:15:04,403 --> 00:15:06,363 Can I take a look at it? 256 00:15:06,447 --> 00:15:08,490 No. Huh. 257 00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:10,284 Are you out of your mind? I have to 258 00:15:10,367 --> 00:15:13,787 I have to get it inside. Inside. 259 00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:26,693 This is Meghan. 260 00:15:26,717 --> 00:15:29,178 How may we assist you? 261 00:15:29,261 --> 00:15:31,472 Meghan? 262 00:15:31,555 --> 00:15:36,101 Um... Oh, uh, hello. 263 00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:38,646 Hmm. Uh 264 00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:41,315 this is Jane Warren 265 00:15:41,398 --> 00:15:44,818 of 13182 Teacup Road. 266 00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:47,905 And... well, 267 00:15:47,988 --> 00:15:50,032 I know this might sound strange, 268 00:15:50,115 --> 00:15:54,370 but I was just wondering if it's still possible 269 00:15:54,453 --> 00:15:58,540 to cancel my family's EGG. 270 00:15:58,624 --> 00:16:00,709 Cancel? 271 00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:02,336 Yes. 272 00:16:02,419 --> 00:16:05,047 I-I mean, you know... 273 00:16:05,130 --> 00:16:06,810 Well-well, you see, the thing is, I-I just, 274 00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:10,219 I don't, I don't know, you know, what-what it is, exactly, 275 00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:13,847 or, you know, what it's supposed to do. 276 00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:15,557 Exactly. 277 00:16:15,641 --> 00:16:19,895 I mean, you know. 278 00:16:21,772 --> 00:16:24,108 I just changed my mind. 279 00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:29,405 And what is the reason 280 00:16:29,488 --> 00:16:31,949 for the change in your mind? 281 00:16:32,032 --> 00:16:33,992 Well. 282 00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:38,288 I don't want it anymore. 283 00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:43,794 I do... I don't want any EGG... anymore. 284 00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:47,923 Uh... thank you, though. 285 00:16:48,006 --> 00:16:49,758 Thank you. 286 00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:52,219 Is there anything else we can help you with today? 287 00:16:52,302 --> 00:16:55,806 No. Um, 288 00:16:55,889 --> 00:16:57,683 so you did it? 289 00:16:57,766 --> 00:17:01,103 You canceled my order? You-you canceled my family's EGG? 290 00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:04,732 We are processing your request. 291 00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:07,609 Okay. I see. Um, 292 00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:12,239 so you'll just... confirm 293 00:17:12,322 --> 00:17:13,782 and let me know? 294 00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:16,910 Or... send a confirmation to my... 295 00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:14,087 You've suffered some tough losses, 296 00:20:14,171 --> 00:20:16,632 and no one blames you for crying in the kitchen 297 00:20:16,715 --> 00:20:20,677 in the middle of the day. 298 00:20:24,431 --> 00:20:27,142 You're heartbroken, 299 00:20:27,225 --> 00:20:30,938 but you know how to choose your paper towels. 300 00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:34,358 Now with 43% more clean-up power. 301 00:21:57,149 --> 00:21:59,526 Aquarian Portal, where we're not happy until 302 00:21:59,609 --> 00:22:01,445 the planets revolve around you. 303 00:22:01,528 --> 00:22:04,072 Shaman-ess Chantal Stargazer speaking. 304 00:22:04,156 --> 00:22:06,575 How can I better align you with your cosmic purpose? 305 00:22:06,658 --> 00:22:10,203 Ah, Chantal, thank God. It's Jane. 306 00:22:10,287 --> 00:22:12,789 Oh... don't aggravate the marinade. 307 00:22:12,873 --> 00:22:14,708 Jane Warren. 308 00:22:14,791 --> 00:22:18,712 Yes. Yes, yes, oh... 309 00:22:18,795 --> 00:22:20,589 Oh, how magical. 310 00:22:20,672 --> 00:22:24,384 Can we talk for a minute, I mean, really talk? 311 00:22:24,468 --> 00:22:26,094 Like real human beings. 312 00:22:26,178 --> 00:22:27,596 Knock yourself out. 313 00:22:27,679 --> 00:22:30,098 I don't want to say this out loud, but 314 00:22:30,182 --> 00:22:33,435 I think I might have been, you know, taken. 315 00:22:33,518 --> 00:22:35,103 Abducted. 316 00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:38,732 - Abducted? By who? - Do my planets say 317 00:22:38,815 --> 00:22:42,235 anything about any of this or anything? 318 00:22:42,319 --> 00:22:44,112 The planets say, 319 00:22:44,196 --> 00:22:48,575 "Today all well-worn and trusty paths are covered over, 320 00:22:48,658 --> 00:22:50,410 "and a new map is drawn. 321 00:22:50,494 --> 00:22:53,288 "Only you have the power to reroute 322 00:22:53,371 --> 00:22:56,124 "the flow of the river of space-time. 323 00:22:56,208 --> 00:22:59,669 "Don't let yourself be swept up by anyone else's dreams. 324 00:22:59,753 --> 00:23:01,046 "Untether yourself. 325 00:23:01,129 --> 00:23:03,924 Resist gravity and fly away." 326 00:23:04,007 --> 00:23:07,302 Resist gravity. 327 00:23:07,385 --> 00:23:09,721 Of course. 328 00:23:15,102 --> 00:23:18,730 Let's see you beam me up now, Scotty, 329 00:23:18,814 --> 00:23:20,482 or whoever you are. 330 00:24:38,476 --> 00:24:41,396 Well, what do we...? 331 00:24:41,479 --> 00:24:45,442 Well... what do...? 332 00:24:50,655 --> 00:24:53,450 Well, what do we do now? 333 00:24:53,533 --> 00:24:56,286 Its leg is stuck. 334 00:24:56,369 --> 00:24:58,580 We could take it without its leg. 335 00:24:58,663 --> 00:25:01,666 Its leg is its best piece. 336 00:25:01,750 --> 00:25:07,005 Mmm, all of this leg talk is making me hungry. 337 00:25:07,088 --> 00:25:10,258 Mmm, are we thinking original recipe or extra crispy? 338 00:25:10,342 --> 00:25:14,095 Original recipe it is. 339 00:25:15,639 --> 00:25:18,225 But we should take a vote. 340 00:25:18,308 --> 00:25:19,952 What is it about a single shared mind 341 00:25:19,976 --> 00:25:21,770 that he doesn't understand? 342 00:25:21,853 --> 00:25:24,022 Let's be careful with our pronouns. 343 00:25:24,105 --> 00:25:26,608 He understands everything that you understand. 344 00:25:26,691 --> 00:25:29,486 We understand everything that we understand. 345 00:25:29,569 --> 00:25:32,113 I love us. 346 00:25:32,197 --> 00:25:33,716 I also love us. That is not... 347 00:25:33,740 --> 00:25:35,325 We love us. 348 00:25:35,408 --> 00:25:38,662 Yes, that really is best. 349 00:25:38,745 --> 00:25:42,666 Well, what do we do now about the madwoman 350 00:25:42,749 --> 00:25:45,168 in the oxygen tower? 351 00:25:50,507 --> 00:25:53,593 The transfer ray will wear off soon. 352 00:25:53,677 --> 00:25:55,971 Whatever we do, we don't want it to wake up. 353 00:25:56,054 --> 00:25:58,598 We are afraid of them waking up. 354 00:25:58,682 --> 00:26:00,600 Because they have their own mind. 355 00:26:00,684 --> 00:26:03,144 Their own terrible desires and wishes. 356 00:26:03,228 --> 00:26:06,523 Their own horrifying lack of this 357 00:26:06,606 --> 00:26:08,775 - and that. - Hey! 358 00:26:33,550 --> 00:26:36,678 I said "Hey!" 359 00:26:39,055 --> 00:26:43,685 You can't just pull us out of our lives, you know. 360 00:26:49,566 --> 00:26:52,944 What, exactly, are you doing with me, anyway? 361 00:26:56,406 --> 00:27:00,827 We don't know. We only work here. 362 00:27:02,954 --> 00:27:05,832 Is there someone I can talk to? 363 00:27:05,915 --> 00:27:10,628 Uh, your... your leader. 364 00:27:15,050 --> 00:27:17,218 Your supervisor. 365 00:27:17,302 --> 00:27:20,055 Take me to your supervisor. 366 00:27:31,483 --> 00:27:35,195 My name is Janet Warren, born Janet Davey, 367 00:27:35,278 --> 00:27:38,198 July 7, 1974. 368 00:27:38,281 --> 00:27:42,118 Five-six, 137 pounds. 369 00:27:42,202 --> 00:27:45,663 When I was a little girl, I got lost in an amusement park 370 00:27:45,747 --> 00:27:48,541 for two hours, but really I was hiding 371 00:27:48,625 --> 00:27:50,085 in one of the backstage areas 372 00:27:50,168 --> 00:27:53,922 with the mascot character costumes. 373 00:27:54,005 --> 00:27:55,799 When I was a junior in high school, 374 00:27:55,882 --> 00:27:58,718 I wanted to be an Olympic ice skater 375 00:27:58,802 --> 00:28:00,929 or a country-western singer. 376 00:28:01,012 --> 00:28:04,391 But then I was none of those things. 377 00:28:04,474 --> 00:28:08,561 I'm married. I have two children. 378 00:28:08,645 --> 00:28:10,647 Two sons. 379 00:28:12,816 --> 00:28:14,776 Two years ago I delivered 380 00:28:14,859 --> 00:28:18,196 a stillborn baby girl. 381 00:28:18,279 --> 00:28:22,158 The light in the room was very harsh. 382 00:28:22,242 --> 00:28:24,953 Very hard. 383 00:28:26,704 --> 00:28:29,833 Very hard. 384 00:28:32,419 --> 00:28:35,672 I hate the paint colors I chose when we remodeled, 385 00:28:35,755 --> 00:28:39,801 and I hate the living room drapes. 386 00:28:39,884 --> 00:28:42,804 I hate our cars. 387 00:28:42,887 --> 00:28:46,015 I wish that I didn't have all of the things that I have 388 00:28:46,099 --> 00:28:48,935 and instead had different things. 389 00:28:49,018 --> 00:28:51,813 I'm afraid of spiders and horses. 390 00:28:53,231 --> 00:28:55,233 Yes, we know. 391 00:28:58,570 --> 00:29:00,655 Where am I? 392 00:29:00,738 --> 00:29:02,991 Are you comfortable? 393 00:29:04,617 --> 00:29:07,579 Yes. Thank you. 394 00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:12,542 Please do not make any individualized, 395 00:29:12,625 --> 00:29:15,044 threatening movements. 396 00:29:16,963 --> 00:29:18,798 Threatening? 397 00:29:18,882 --> 00:29:22,802 You're not afraid of me, are you? 398 00:29:24,637 --> 00:29:26,931 Are you comfortable? 399 00:29:28,850 --> 00:29:32,645 Yes. Thank you. 400 00:29:34,939 --> 00:29:37,442 But why are you afraid of me? 401 00:29:39,444 --> 00:29:41,204 We are afraid of how often 402 00:29:41,279 --> 00:29:45,492 you change your minds, and so unexpectedly. 403 00:29:45,575 --> 00:29:50,455 But surely you change your mind sometimes. 404 00:29:50,538 --> 00:29:52,165 Don't you? 405 00:29:52,248 --> 00:29:56,544 Ours is a single shared mind. 406 00:29:56,628 --> 00:29:59,547 To change it would require the same energy needed 407 00:29:59,631 --> 00:30:04,511 to reverse the flow of your so-called Mississippi River. 408 00:30:06,304 --> 00:30:11,017 One mind. That doesn't sound very democratic. 409 00:30:11,100 --> 00:30:13,728 In a democracy, half the population 410 00:30:13,811 --> 00:30:16,523 wants something different than what they're getting. 411 00:30:16,606 --> 00:30:19,192 We've seen how that can go. 412 00:30:19,275 --> 00:30:21,444 You're talking about Earth. 413 00:30:21,528 --> 00:30:23,696 What's left of it. 414 00:30:24,948 --> 00:30:27,450 You've been watching us? 415 00:30:27,534 --> 00:30:28,910 Yes. 416 00:30:28,993 --> 00:30:31,579 Since first we heard your radios. 417 00:30:31,663 --> 00:30:34,040 Nineteen hundred and forty-five, 418 00:30:34,123 --> 00:30:36,501 the United States defeat Japan. 419 00:30:36,584 --> 00:30:39,420 Nineteen hundred and sixty-five, 420 00:30:39,504 --> 00:30:44,592 the Beatles defeat the son of your God, and so on. 421 00:30:44,676 --> 00:30:47,720 Well, no, that's not exactly right. 422 00:30:47,804 --> 00:30:50,974 And then, in your 1950s, when you started sending pictures, 423 00:30:51,057 --> 00:30:53,101 we watched. 424 00:30:53,184 --> 00:30:57,605 The trials of your kings, the collapse of your towers. 425 00:30:57,689 --> 00:31:00,733 We studied the applause of studio audiences, 426 00:31:00,817 --> 00:31:04,445 hoping it was evidence of a single, shared mind. 427 00:31:04,529 --> 00:31:06,990 You can imagine our disappointment when we learned 428 00:31:07,073 --> 00:31:11,703 it was artificial and canned, like your diet colas. 429 00:31:13,705 --> 00:31:15,623 But more than anything else, 430 00:31:15,707 --> 00:31:18,626 we studied your television commercials. 431 00:31:18,710 --> 00:31:20,253 We struggled to understand 432 00:31:20,336 --> 00:31:23,464 what was important to you, what you loved. 433 00:31:23,548 --> 00:31:27,051 What you wanted, what you needed, and why, so often, 434 00:31:27,135 --> 00:31:29,345 they weren't the same thing. 435 00:31:31,764 --> 00:31:36,269 You have all of this unbelievable technology, 436 00:31:36,352 --> 00:31:39,522 and all you've been doing is watching television? 437 00:31:39,606 --> 00:31:41,774 Specifically, we have been watching 438 00:31:41,858 --> 00:31:44,360 your television commercials, yes. 439 00:31:44,444 --> 00:31:49,991 But we don't even watch our television commercials anymore. 440 00:31:50,074 --> 00:31:54,621 We've, I don't know, evolved. 441 00:31:54,704 --> 00:31:56,831 We skip right past them. 442 00:31:56,914 --> 00:32:00,501 It's true, you have evolved. 443 00:32:00,585 --> 00:32:03,004 Commercials now grow in the rich soil 444 00:32:03,087 --> 00:32:06,341 of your unconscious minds. 445 00:32:06,424 --> 00:32:09,302 And that matters to you? 446 00:32:09,385 --> 00:32:13,181 It only matters that humans are stopped. 447 00:32:13,264 --> 00:32:15,183 But... 448 00:32:15,266 --> 00:32:17,602 Okay. 449 00:32:17,685 --> 00:32:20,521 But what did I ever do? 450 00:32:20,605 --> 00:32:23,316 I'm not in charge of anything, or 451 00:32:23,399 --> 00:32:26,819 any governments or countries or... 452 00:32:26,903 --> 00:32:30,823 The Kanamit understands that a human being is most vulnerable 453 00:32:30,907 --> 00:32:34,243 when it perceives a lack of something. 454 00:32:34,327 --> 00:32:36,079 All you ever did is want something 455 00:32:36,162 --> 00:32:39,707 other than what you already had. 456 00:32:39,791 --> 00:32:42,085 But that's anyone. 457 00:32:42,168 --> 00:32:43,336 That's anyone around here. 458 00:32:43,419 --> 00:32:45,213 That's, that's Ellen Jones, 459 00:32:45,296 --> 00:32:48,007 that's Marge Stevens from right next-door. 460 00:32:48,091 --> 00:32:51,052 But your wanting is powered by grief. 461 00:32:51,135 --> 00:32:53,346 Like the great glittering cities of your world, 462 00:32:53,429 --> 00:32:56,724 we can see your wanting from space. 463 00:32:56,808 --> 00:33:00,436 My grief doesn't make television commercials. 464 00:33:04,315 --> 00:33:09,737 So you've been... monitoring us? 465 00:33:11,698 --> 00:33:17,286 Watching our commercials so you can see 466 00:33:17,370 --> 00:33:20,039 what makes us weak? 467 00:33:22,709 --> 00:33:24,752 So you can what? 468 00:33:26,295 --> 00:33:28,297 Invade us or something? 469 00:33:37,181 --> 00:33:40,101 The EGG. 470 00:33:40,184 --> 00:33:45,440 You know what it is, don't you? 471 00:33:45,523 --> 00:33:48,443 Of course I know what it is. 472 00:33:48,526 --> 00:33:50,903 Who do you think laid it? 473 00:33:50,987 --> 00:33:54,824 Who do you think laid all of them? 474 00:33:59,203 --> 00:34:02,957 - Yeah! - The idea wasn't ours, of course. 475 00:34:03,040 --> 00:34:05,376 The idea for the EGG was yours, 476 00:34:05,460 --> 00:34:07,587 - Mrs. Warren. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 477 00:34:13,509 --> 00:34:16,304 So that everything could be okay again, 478 00:34:16,387 --> 00:34:19,932 and this time okay forever. 479 00:34:20,016 --> 00:34:23,269 And that's really all we're doing. 480 00:34:23,352 --> 00:34:26,439 Everything will indeed be okay again. 481 00:34:26,522 --> 00:34:28,941 - Uh-uh. Okay... - Especially because 482 00:34:29,025 --> 00:34:32,278 there won't be any human beings around 483 00:34:32,361 --> 00:34:34,864 to change their minds about it. 484 00:34:36,783 --> 00:34:39,494 Uh-oh... Oh, that's not very nice. 485 00:34:39,577 --> 00:34:40,661 Oh, God! 486 00:35:37,260 --> 00:35:39,262 Hello? 487 00:35:43,474 --> 00:35:45,476 Excuse me? 488 00:35:47,478 --> 00:35:51,148 I wonder if you can tell me what time it is on Earth. 489 00:35:54,152 --> 00:35:57,405 I'd like to go back now, please. 490 00:35:57,488 --> 00:35:59,657 I'd like to go home. 491 00:35:59,740 --> 00:36:01,659 You won't be able to stop anything. 492 00:36:01,742 --> 00:36:06,372 And here with us, you'll be safe. 493 00:36:06,455 --> 00:36:10,126 I don't care about that, and I don't want to, 494 00:36:10,209 --> 00:36:13,421 for God's sake, stay here with you. 495 00:36:13,504 --> 00:36:16,924 I just want to be at my designated fulfillment center 496 00:36:17,008 --> 00:36:18,551 at my allotted hour of fulfillment, 497 00:36:18,634 --> 00:36:20,970 like a normal person. 498 00:36:21,053 --> 00:36:26,934 You remember that you attempted to cancel your family's EGG. 499 00:36:27,018 --> 00:36:30,605 It's true, I did. 500 00:36:32,565 --> 00:36:35,610 But that was before I knew what it was. 501 00:36:38,487 --> 00:36:42,408 It wasn't really canceled, was it? 502 00:36:42,491 --> 00:36:45,453 You understand that your EGG is a spawn 503 00:36:45,536 --> 00:36:49,040 designed to eradicate the human race? 504 00:36:51,042 --> 00:36:53,127 Yes. 505 00:36:53,210 --> 00:36:55,129 That doesn't matter to me, either. 506 00:36:55,212 --> 00:36:57,423 You understand that your EGG is... 507 00:36:57,506 --> 00:36:59,008 Yes. 508 00:36:59,091 --> 00:37:01,677 I understand. 509 00:37:01,761 --> 00:37:03,804 And I know. 510 00:37:08,142 --> 00:37:09,977 I just 511 00:37:12,396 --> 00:37:14,440 want to hold it. 512 00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:20,321 Even for a little while. 513 00:37:20,404 --> 00:37:23,991 Because it's... 514 00:37:24,075 --> 00:37:26,535 Well, it's mine. 515 00:38:09,787 --> 00:38:11,872 It would be much, much better 516 00:38:11,956 --> 00:38:16,043 if it was you who was coming home with me today. 517 00:39:06,469 --> 00:39:08,763 Jane, oh, Jane, you're here! 518 00:39:08,846 --> 00:39:11,158 Because if anyone deserves to have their own EGG, it's you. 519 00:39:11,182 --> 00:39:12,767 Nine out of ten of us agree. 520 00:39:12,850 --> 00:39:14,650 But it really does make everything okay again. 521 00:39:14,685 --> 00:39:16,812 And this time it's gonna be okay forever. You'll see. 522 00:39:41,378 --> 00:39:44,173 Existential dread got you down? 523 00:39:44,256 --> 00:39:48,135 Well, Mrs. Janet Warren finally found relief. 524 00:39:48,219 --> 00:39:50,805 Albeit for a limited time only. 525 00:39:50,888 --> 00:39:55,142 All sales are final 526 00:39:55,226 --> 00:39:58,270 here in The Twilight Zone. 527 00:40:06,112 --> 00:40:08,322 Captioning sponsored by CBS 528 00:40:08,405 --> 00:40:10,565 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 37168

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