Original subtitles

[ Sighs ]

Come on.

Pick up, pick up, pick up,

pick up, pick up.

Hey, guys,

this is Portia.

I'm probably on set,

'cause I'm a working actor.

Please leave me a message.

Hey, Portia.

Uh, this is Drew Gardner.

Look, Dory didn't come home

last night,

and I'm not sure where she's at.

If you know where she is

or anything of that nature,

please just give me a call back.

Elliott Goss.

You're probably still asleep

or something --

I'm starting to get

really worried.

Please call me when you wake up.

[ Sighs ]

[ Cellphone beeps ]

[ Cellphone rings ]

Hello, who is this?

Uh, hi.

Um, this is Drew Gardner.

Is Dory there with you?

D-Dory, quick.

Put on your clothes.

Your boyfriend

is catching on to us.

Hey, is she there?

Is this for real?

Dude, calm down.

Uh, I don't mean to put this

on you or anything like that,

but Dory didn't come home

last night,

and I don't know where she is,

and I just, um, I feel like

she's fully missing

and I'm kind of freaking out.

Yeah,

I'm sure she's fine.

She's not fine, Julian.

I'm telling you she's not fine.

-Whoa, whoa.

All I'm saying is if

a girl doesn't come home,

she spent the night

somewhere.

Um...

Wait, you think

that she's cheating on me?

You think

she's cheating on you.

That's why you called me.

[ Cellphone beeps ]

[ Train rattles ]

You ignorant bitch.

You let me die?

Lorraine.

No.

I didn't mean to.

I'm dead, Dory.

Dead. Okay?

And you know I didn't jump

in front of that train.

You know

that they pushed me.

[ Gasps ]

Chantal!

Oh, Dory.

Why didn't you save Lorraine?

Now we're all gonna die.

You know that they're gonna

push you, too.

You know

they're gonna kill you.

Who?

Who's gonna kill me?

Who?! Who?!!

Hey, sleepyhead.

H-how long

have I been out?

Uh, since, like,

tape 3 of about 5,000.

Look at this.

What is that?

I don't even know

how to Google this crap.

I can't believe you saw Chantal

at this shit hole.

I wish you would

have woken me up.

Yeah, I figured

you needed the shuteye.

-What time is it?

-It's late.

Oh, shit.

Shit, shit, shit.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

-What's the matter?

Shit.

Uh, I-I just have to go.

-What?

-I have to go.

No, you don't have to go.

Yes, I do.

I have to.

Wait a sec.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

Hey, hey.

-Yeah.

I want to tell you

something here.

Now, I know we're looking

for Chantal,

and we're gonna find her,

but I'm also very, very,

very happy that I found you.

[ Sighs ]

-Huh?

-Yeah.

I just got to get my bag.

Yeah, great.

Agnes Cho.

What?

It's Agnes fucking Cho.

So I need some advice

really quick.

I accidentally passed out

at Keith's last night

and woke up to, like,

5,000 texts from Drew.

But Drew hasn't been

texting you, right?

He, uh, he called.

I was asleep.

Okay, so I was thinking

of writing like,

"Hey, sorry I didn't call

last night.

Lorraine died."

No, no, no, no, no.

Don't apologize.

Okay, say you were with me

and, um, okay.

You know how

you can spend the night

at the Natural

History Museum?

Say you were at one

of those sleepovers

and your phone died.

Easy, boom.

What do I tell him when he asks

why I didn't tell him

something earlier about it?

Just say you did tell him

and he wasn't listening.

Will that work?

It's so obviously a lie.

Dory, if you believe it,

he'll believe it.

[ Door opens ]

[ Sighs ]

Dory, Jesus.

What the...?

What, you're not missing?

What?

Why would I be missing?

Okay.

I'm sorry.

Where have you been

all night?

At the museum

with Elliott.

What are you talking

about, Dory?

Drew, I told you.

I was gonna spend the night

at the Natural History Museum

with Elliott.

You did?

Yeah.

You really --

you don't remember?

No. I don't remember that.

No.

I told you at dinner

the other night.

God, I guess you

just weren't listening.

I guess, yeah.

I guess

I wasn't listening.

Wait, Dory, why didn't you

answer any of my texts?

Oh, my phone.

It just died.

Oh, your phone --

your phone died.

Jesus, Dory.

I was so worried about you.

Okay, I was freaking out.

I called everybody we know.

What if something

happened to you?

I didn't know.

Well, nothing did.

Look, I'm okay.

Why didn't you

just call me?

I'm sorry.

My phone died, okay?

Okay.

But look, I just -- I was

where I said I'd be, right?

Yeah.

Hey, where's

your sleeping bag?

What?

I mean, so you went

to the museum.

I mean, wouldn't you

bring a sleeping bag?

Oh, no.

We just kind of, like,

curled up, you know?

It was kind of uncomfortable,

actually, but...

Okay,

why would you do that?

I mean, we have

sleeping bags here.

Why wouldn't you use

one of those?

Do you want to go to the zoo

with me?

What?!

I think Agnes Cho knows

something about Chantal,

so I'm gonna go over there

and ask her some questions.

Dory, no!

I would -- I thought you were

done with this stuff!

Okay, I don't understand.

Why don't I know anything

that's happening

around here anymore?

I know

you asked me to stop,

and I said I would,

but I can't.

I'm too close

to finding her, Drew.

So I'm gonna go

to the zoo.

And I really hope

you'll come with me.

I'm not gonna let you go

to the zoo alone,

so I'm gonna go.

-Great.

But, hey,

I'm not in a good mood.

I'd really like that.

[ Sighs ]

Hey, Dor?

I'm really glad

you're not missing.

I don't know

what you're talking about.

I have you on tape, Agnes.

It wasn't me.

Hey, do you mind if I feed

the little guy something,

like a banana

or something?

-No!

-Okay, yeah.

Agnes,

Chantal is in danger.

Do you understand?

Her life is in danger.

[ Monkey chirps ]

$5,000.

What are you

talking about?

I'll tell you where Chantal

is if you give me $5,000.

-Whoa.

-It's not for me!

It's for these

magnificent creatures,

some of whom will die

unless they receive

pricey medicines

and acupuncture treatments

that the stupid zoo board

won't authorize.

Right.

Of course.

I mean,

that's so sad, Agnes.

That is so sad. It is,

but, I mean, $5,000?

You know what I -- I mean,

c-could you just --

could you just tell me?

Please?

Just tell me.

If you're as serious about this

as you say you are,

you'll cooperate.

[ Sighs ]

[ Monkey chirps ]

Fine.

Drew: Dory, where are we

gonna get $5,000?

I don't know,

but I'm not letting

some basic bitch

slow me down.

You guys know how I'm, like,

a really good friend.

-You're a great friend.

-You are.

Um, you know, I mean, Portia,

how many times have I had

to, you know, FedEx

your birth control?

Remember that one time in Tulum?

Oh, my God.

Yes.

Ugh, concierge

would not pull out.

Right.

And Elliott, you know,

it's been a hard week and I

haven't left your side, right?

[ Sighs ]

Yeah.

Even after, you know,

we discovered

that you'd been bold-faced lying

to us for years

about overcoming a terminal

illness that you never had.

-For sure, yeah.

-Mm.

So I need your guys' help.

-Of course!

-Absolutely, Dory.

-Come on.

-We'll do anything.

So pretty much, Agnes Cho

knows where Chantal is.

-[ Gasps ]

-What?

Yeah.

And she's willing to tell me.

-That's amazing.

-Yeah.

But she wants $5,000.

-What?

-I know it's a lot,

but I would never ask you guys

for this

if it wasn't an emergency.

You know that.

And you guys, obviously,

you know...

you got a budget.

So [exhales deeply]

what do you think?

[ Both chuckle ]

-Yeah.

-Yeah?

-No.

-No.

We're gonna take a second.

Okay, you're gonna give her

the money?

Oh, my God.

I don't want to.

I feel bad.

I'm like, it's not for Dory.

It's for Chantal,

and if it were for Dory,

like, I would give it to her

in a heartbeat.

-100% agree.

-Okay, so, united front.

We're not giving

our best friend a dime.

-Yes.

-Okay.

God, I would never

ask this of you.

I would never ask this

of you.

-I love you.

-I love you, too.

So, Dory, first of all,

we love you unconditionally.

Thank you. You too.

Okay, and we support you 100%.

And we are gonna do

anything for you --

anything,

forever, forever.

-As long as it's non-financial.

-Mm-hmm.

-Seriously?

-Dory, I'm so sorry.

I'm, like, a successful

and gorgeous actress,

but, like, I have these

leeches in my life --

agent,

manager, publicist,

business manager, lawyer,

that just --

95% off the top

of every paycheck.

I'm sorry.

I'm poor.

I know, like,

I have a book deal,

and that's "huge" or whatever,

you know,

but the advance hasn't even

come in yet, okay?

Also, like, between you and me,

like, my parents pay

my cellphone bill,

and everything else that I need.

Yeah.

Just we were so close.

Okay.

Dory, calm down.

Don't kick my furniture, please.

Hold on a minute.

Who do we know that has money?

What about Gail?

No, I d--

I-I-I-I-I quit Gail's.

-Okay.

-Oh, God.

Um...

What if we blackmailed

Nanny Daddy?

H-How?

What do you mean?

Look, I mean, I saw the guy

take a photo up a woman's skirt

on public transit,

so if he has one picture,

I'm willing to bet

he's got 1,000 of these things.

Okay, I love-love-love-love

this idea.

I mean, do you have

any proof of it, though?

Well, no.

So what happens

if he asks for evidence?

-You bluff.

-You mean lie.

Bluff's another word

for lying.

Yeah, when are you nerds

gonna accept

that lying is a tool, okay?

And learn to love it

because nothing in this world

is real or true?

Right, Dory?

Didn't we talk about that at

the museum of Natural History?

Yes, I-I think we were.

Mm-hmm.

Oh!

Guys, I just remembered.

I think

I actually still have

the business card

of Nanny Daddy

in my jacket pocket

from the vigil!

Remember?

-Okay.

-This is great.

-This might be good.

This might work.

Drew, what's going on?

Why are you

rubbing your ears?

You think you can do this?

-Yeah, sorry.

I mean, yeah,

I think I can do it.

I just, um, you know,

I want to have a plan "B"

just in case

this doesn't work out.

Okay.

I mean, my first instinct

was just to go straight

to the family.

You know, just ask them,

but I don't know where they are.

Should we just, like --

we're not gonna go Chappaqua

and just, like,

wait outside in the car.

Okay, I actually follow her

entire family on social media.

They are so weirdly boring,

it's amazing.

Cool. I don't think

that's a good idea.

I mean, at this point, Dory,

the family hates you.

Dory, Dory,

they're in town right now.

They're at that bridal shop.

-Oh, shit.

I think we just go.

-Yeah, I don't think you go.

And we talk to them

before they leave town.

I'm gonna go with Dory, 'cause

I'm really good with families.

-True.

-[ Groans ] Oh, no.

[ Sighs ]

Hey, what's happening?

You definitely

wouldn't understand.

What do you think?

You look so pretty,

honey.

[ Sighs ]

Thanks.

My only sadness is that

your sister's not here.

I know.

I know.

Okay.

I feel too nervous.

I feel like

they're gonna remember me.

Do you want me

to do the talking?

I'm not nervous at all.

-Yes.

-Okay.

-Thank you.

It's open!

Here it is.

This is my little dick.

-Whoa!

-Aah!

Who -- who the hell is this?

I'm gonna need you to put

your pants on, Chuck.

Hi,

Mr. and Mrs. Witherbottom.

Yes?

Hi, um, this is gonna

sound insane,

but I know someone

who knows where Chantal is,

and unfortunately, that person

is asking for $5,000.

Um, so, essentially, if you

want to know where Chantal is,

you need to give me

$5,000.

Hey, guys. This is the dress

I'm getting married in!

[ Chuckles ]

So, Chuck, does your, uh,

wife, Miranda, know

that you like to sext

younger women?

Like she gives a shit.

Oh, yeah.

'Cause I actually think

she might give a shit

about this, Chuck.

Who is this bozo?

That bozo is the FBI's

most favorite hacker.

He knows all your sad

little hobbies,

and, frankly,

is pretty pissed.

Frankly, I would say

absolutely I am pissed.

Okay, and, uh,

I actually run

the Dark Web,

you little prick.

So I think you might want to be

a little bit nicer to me,

first off, and you know

what I have here?

I actually have a hard drive

right here

with hundreds, mm, actually

thousands of pictures

up the skirts of women,

taken by you.

Right here

on the hard drive.

What do you want from me?

We want $5,000.

[ Laughs ]

Hey, we want $5,000!

-You think this is funny?

-You little prick.

Yeah, you got 30 seconds.

Not 20, 30.

Yeah?

Or what?

Okay, so that hard drive

becomes your one-way

easy pass to jail.

You lose, like, your kids,

your job, reputation.

Like, that sounds horrible

to me, don't you think, Chuck?

I think it sounds

like total crap to me.

Yeah, that's bad. So you got,

uh, 29 -- 28!

-Uh-oh. This is bad, Chuck.

-27, 26...

The numbers are going down.

-Damn it.

-...25.

If the numbers were up,

that would be good.

-Get out the pen, Chuck.

-There you go.

-24!

-I need a pen. I need a pen.

I have a pen right --

chill out!

You need to chill!

[ Sighs ]

$5,000?

Did I stutter?

$5,000.

And another thing.

While you're at it?

Make that out

to Agnes Cho.

I don't know what scam

you think you're pulling,

but this family has been through

too much already,

all right?

-Totally.

So I'm gonna

ask you just once

to get

your ass out of here.

Dory: No, no, no.

Sorry, sorry.

Excuse me.

I'm sorry.

This is not a scam.

I promise you, okay?

I know you.

How do I know you?

Okay. Please don't get upset,

all right?

But this is very good news.

Okay?

Oh, look.

It's Keith, see?

I have been working

with Keith.

Who the hell is Keith?

The private investigator

you guys hired --

Keith Powell.

We didn't hire

a private investigator,

and I don't know

who Keith Powell is.

You're the girl who put on

my sweater.

All right,

somebody call the police.

I am sick of this.

I am sick of all of it.

That won't be necessary,

because we are gonna be leaving.

-You know Keith.

-Come on, Dory.

Don't worry about it,

Dory.

Elliott, Elliott, if they

don't know who Keith is,

who the fuck is Keith?

I don't know.

Thank you so much.

And -- and -- and I didn't

even Google him, El.

I never even Googled him.

Don't tell them.

I want to tell them.

-No, I'm not gonna tell them.

-He was, like, stalking me.

-Hey.

-Hey.

I'm sorry, babe.

Look.

Anytime you even talked

about the guy,

I knew something

was strange.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

I just feel kind of sick

about it all.

I mean, I don't know

who this person is

that I've been talking to.

You know, he could be

a part of the cult.

-Yeah.

-You know, that was the one time

he didn't want to come over

and help

was when we went

to the cult that one day.

Honestly don't know what to say.

Yeah, I don't -- I don't

have anything exciting, really,

to say, or, you know,

it was like...

Except for that

[Singsong voice]

Mama got the money.

Mama got the money.

Mama got the money!

Elliott: Oh, my God.

Portia.

I got the m-- I did it.

-You did it? Oh, my God.

-Oh, my God.

Oh, God. Drew was, like,

supporting character.

He was like,

"I'm a dark web man,"

or, like,

"I am the dark web!"

It was something

about the dark web.

-Oh, my God. I love you.

-I love you, too.

Oh, it feels so good

to feel accomplished.

-Okay, so let's go to the zoo.

-Yeah!

-Right?

-Before they close.

-I love the zoo.

-Can I just say something?

There is a lot going on

right now,

but this is very, very,

very, very, very exciting!

[ Laughs ]

Agnes: How do I know

if this check is any good?

Oh, I mean, we emotionally

abused a man to get that.

Tell me where she is,

Agnes.

She's in Montreal.

Montreal.

Why?

I don't know.

She said she couldn't talk

about it

and I respected that.

She was always crying

and scared.

[ Cellphone vibrating ]

Oh, shit.

It's him.

-No, no, no.

-Don't pick up.

No, I already told him

I was coming here.

I have to talk to him.

Please,

do not pick this up.

-Okay, he's dangerous.

-I'll be able to handle him.

Dory, you don't know

what he's capable of.

Well, I'm gonna have to talk

to him eventually!

Hey, you guys have to go.

All your busy energy is

upsetting Amelia Earhart.

She seems fine.

Okay. Guys, what we need to do

right now

is we need to pack.

Make sure you get

your passports.

Get my passport, okay?

And then I'm gonna go

borrow Gail's car,

and then we're all gonna

meet up at Keith's.

I'm gonna text you the address.

-I said out, now!

-Stop.

[ Opera music playing ]

What is happening?

Gail. Hi.

I'm sorry to scare you.

It's Dory.

Hi.

-Hi.

-I'm sorry.

I'm having an emergency

right now,

and I didn't know

who else to go to.

You've always been

so helpful.

-I missed you so much.

-Oh, thanks.

Guess what?

We found out where Chantal is.

-Yay!

-Yeah, I know.

Where is she?

She's in Canada.

I know.

So we have to go get her,

but listen, Gail.

I need your car

to go get Chantal.

-Of course!

-Yeah?

Ah, thank you

so much, Gail.

Of course.

You go get Chanel,

bring her back here.

Thank you, Gail.

Thank you.

Yeah. Yes!

Go! Go get her!

Go get her! Okay.

Go get Chanel.

If I'm not out of there

in 10 minutes,

you call the police,

okay?

Dory, I'm giving you

five minutes, tops.

Okay.

-Please be careful.

-We love you, Dor!

-Be careful, Dory.

-We love you.

-This is so scary.

-Mm. I don't like this.

[ Knock on door ]

Oh, there you are.

Thought

you were ignoring me.

I would

really appreciate it

if you would respond

to my texts and my calls.

I don't like

playing games.

You're right.

I should have responded.

I'm sorry.

I'm -- I'm so sorry.

Okay.

Yeah, all right.

-Yeah.

-Thanks for apologizing.

-Yeah.

-You rule.

So, Agnes told me

where Chantal is.

Where?

Miami.

Miami?

Yeah.

That doesn't sound right.

You sure?

Yeah.

I-I-I'm positive.

Yeah.

S-she said she's in Miami.

She's, like, hiding out

at some naval base

or something.

-In Miami?

-Yeah.

Oh, okay.

Maybe, uh...

I was thinking,

maybe you should call

the Witherbottoms.

Don't you think?

'Cause I feel like

they're probably pretty anxious

to hear from you.

No, I don't think

that's a very good idea,

not until we have Chantal

actually in our hands.

-Right.

-Okay?

I don't want to get them

all worked up,

for all we know,

Chantal is dead.

Okay, I actually just realized

that I haven't eaten all day,

and I am --

I am literally starving.

So I'm just gonna pop

in this bodega over here

if y'all don't mind.

Yes!

Can you get me a kombucha?

Winterfresh?

-Wait, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Nobody's leaving the car,

okay?

The second Dory gets out

of there and in this car,

we're speeding away.

-Oh, come on.

-That's it.

No, it's only gonna take

two seconds.

Drew, it's gonna take,

like, two seconds,

and he's gonna make our trip --

No, you selfish dipshits!

Okay?

Get whatever you want --

gum or juice or something --

in Montreal.

Nobody's leaving the car.

Oh, my God.

I'm sorry,

but stay in the car.

Okay. So they do have 6:00 a.m.

flights to Miami,

which means we got

a couple hours to kill.

All right?

-Oh, yeah.

Um, you know what?

I really want to make sure

I have time to get home

first, though, so...

You know, I can't stop

thinking about you, Dory.

Just going crazy thinking

about you wrapping those legs

around me,

pulling me inside you.

Yeah.

Moving your hips

back and forth.

Yeah. Good, I'm so crazy

about you, too, but, you know,

I really want to get home

first, because,

um, I got to -- I got to break

up with Drew, you know?

I don't want to keep

lying to him, so...

No, you can't.

It's killing you.

Yeah. Um...

Yeah, I wish I didn't

have to go, but I do.

I just, I have to go,

'cause I know Drew's

waiting for me, so...

Drew!

Drew, Drew, Drew.

I hate that guy.

You're leaving

all the time.

You're leaving.

-I know.

I'm sorry, but I'm g--

I'm gonna see you

first thing in the morning,

right?

-We should go in there.

-And do what, Drew?

-And get him.

-Stop.

What does that mean,

"get him"?

Collect him?

-Get him! Yeah, get the guy.

-[ Sighs ]

-I'm gonna go in there.

I'm going in.

-I'm sorry, is that a taser?

-Yeah, it's a taser, okay?

-Why?

Drew, what are you doing

with a taser?

-To tase the guy!

-Stop! Drew.

You have wiggly wrists.

-Okay, go, go.

-Dory, you're back.

-Let's go.

-Are you okay?

-Yeah.

Okay, cool.

What happened?

Just go!

Elliott: I'm overheating.

I'm overheating.

Heads up, your boyfriend

carries a taser.

Yeah, I know.

Okay, this is bonkers.

♪ I thought the future

would be cooler ♪

♪ I thought the future

would be cooler ♪

♪ I thought the brave world

would be newer ♪

♪ I thought the future

would be cooler ♪

♪ Loving comes easy ♪

♪ Liking it ain't free ♪