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We’ve played a game of stay away,

but it cost more than I can pay.

Without you I can't make my way.

I surrender, dear.

I may seem proud, and I may act gay.

That's just a pose, I'm not that way.

'Cause deep down in my heart I say, I surrender, dear.

Those little, mean things we were doing

must have been part of the game, lending a spice to the wooing,

oh, but I don't care who's to blame.

When stars appear and shadows falls,

then you'll hear my poor heart call to you

my love, my life, my all, I surrender, dear.

We’ve played a game of stay away,

but it cost more than I can pay.

Without you I can't make my way, I surrender, dear.

Will you please shut off that noise?

Noise?

Mother, that's Bing Crosby.

I don't understand how you could

be so interested in a radio singer

which you've never even seen.

I, for one, don't like it.

Thousands of girls can't all be wrong.

Thousands of girls don't have a chance to marry a marquis.

But they all haven't a smart mother.

You're impossible.

No I'm not, mother.

What are you doing?

Changing the tune.

Oh, sweetheart, you must have your jokes.

Jokes?

It was mother's doing.

Anyway, I was lying here thinking.

And I know what you were thinking.

What?

That you were asleep.

Sleep, thinking.

Sleep, thinking

Oh, there's a bee.

More jokes.

Look!

Don't strike at it, it might sting him.

Don't!

Ouch!

Did the bee sting you while he lived?

Not when he lives, but when he sits down.

Look at it palpitate.

There comes my sister's train now, Jerry.

Hey, hey!

Come on with a 20. - Oh, yeah.

- Well, you got me here in time. - Sure, 30 seconds to spare.

I hope you recognizes me. I haven't seen her in years.

That a boy. Good luck!

Hang on to it, you'll need it tomorrow.

Oh, listen, officer, this is not my car.

It's going to be your ticket.

Now, captain, I'm a very, very close friend

of the police commissioner.

This is what I like to give you guys tickets--

he'll know I'm on the job.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah. he'll know that then.

That one, that one, and be careful of that one.

Hello, sis.

How are ya?

- I beg your pardon? - Oh, well, I beg yours.

I thought you were my sister.

- Oh, really. - Yes.

You see, you're just her size and you're just as beautiful.

Your sister?

Yes, I got a wire from her, said she'd be in on the limited Tuesday.

- But this is Monday. - Oh, Monday.

Well, you see, I work nights, and sometimes I get

a little mixed up on my days.

- And your sisters? - No really.

I have the wire from her right here in my pocket.

I will show it to you if you think--

- Your brother? - He thought he was.

- He thought he was? - Well, I'm glad I'm not.

What?

You're a music teacher?

A masher.

No, lady.

I'm only waiting for my sister.

Oh bosh.

But I found my idea.

Marquis!

Could I help you, Joe?

- Please, please. - Oh, fine.

It's outrageous!

And I believe you're encouraging him.

Say, I only wish she would.

It is impudence!

This lady it's my fiance.

Oh, well, you can get out of that.

Ouch!

- Hey, wait a minute. - It's preposterous!

- What's this, a sword? - Certainly!

I have been insulted!

Marquis!

I will teach him a lesson.

En garde.

Tally ho!

Look out behind you.

Oh!

Now, you have insulted my honor.

Well, you put that sticker down and I'll knock you on it.

Imagine the Marquis fighting a duel over you.

Is that what he's doing?

En garde.

Oi!

- I'm two up. - Now, I am mad.

Not really. Well, come, come.

Ooh!

Isn't this thrilling?

Aah!

Aah!

Now, you say sorry and drop that sword.

I will not do it!

- I tell you, drop it! - Never!

I am hot!

I am very hot from this.

Well then, cool of from this.

Ah!

Ahh!

Come on.

Hello, officer. How's everything?

You'll pardon me, I'll be going.

Am-scray!

Hi ho!

Well, here we are, three hours shot.

Can I help it if we had to stop at a police station?

Well, if we hadn't been pinched, we could have followed her car.

Oh.

Her she is now.

Oh, it's a dog we're following.

- No, Jerry, it's her dog. - Follow me.

Hello, boy. Hello there.

How are you. Hello.

You!

Aw, that's too bad.

He loves water.

Mm-hmm.

Here comes Bing.

Pardon me, aren't you Mr. Crosby?

Why, yes miss, but you're not the girl.

- There she is now, Jerry. - Ooh, good.

You know, I'm a bit of a crooner myself.

- We're not interested. - I'll say we're not.

You wouldn't be.

- Have you got romance? - Girly, I've got loads of it for you.

Oh, I beg your pardon.

You look just like someone I know.

- Who is this fellow? - I don't know.

This lady is my wife.

Well, goodnight.

I thought she was a friend of mine.

Well, I've never even seen him before.

- Just a masher, huh? - Oh-- oh, no.

Really, sir, I've never made that mistake before.

- What difference does that make? - Chauncey, control yourself.

Chauncey?

Not the Chauncey Olcott, the sweet singer

of those beautiful Irish ballads?

Sure, a little bit of heaven fell from out the sky

one day.

Not he by any chance?

- Just the lady's husband. - Oh, well.

But you look like a genial, broad-minded

man of the world, a man who might make a mistake once or twice.

I make no mistakes.

But, of course, I didn't have any reference to the young lady

choosing you for her handsome protector.

And that's what I like to see, the husband defending the wife,

and the whole-- the little sprouts.

Of course, I'm no masher. Oh, perish the thought.

If I were a masher, I'd be a little frightened,

and you can see I'm not frightened that much.

- I'm glad to meet you. - That's a pleasure.

- Chauncey, don't break his hand. - Oh, boy, she's beautiful.

And father-- oh, I must meet father.

- This is-- - Ixnay, ixnay.

The ong-wray ame-day, Jerry.

- You're telling me. - Well, let's get out of here.

Quick, while we're all in one piece. Release that man and we'll just--

Could we have your autograph? Please do.

Not interested.

A little later, thank you.

But not now.

- Who was father? - Father?

Pansy.

Nearly broke my hand.

So!

- Ooh, a leaping tuna. - No.

Flying seal. - Maybe.

I have been insulted for the last time.

No, no.

Hold.

My card.

What is this? What is this?

- Tangle foot, you'll love it. - Stick around, Marquis.

- Am-scray? - Hi-ho.

Here we go.

Oh, Mr. Crosby, your autograph, please.

Well, lady, if you pardon me, I'm busy as a bird-dog right now.

Afterwards.

Buzz me on the morrow, Joe.

Don't forget, because I'll be waiting.

Buzz me.

Have you got any idea where to find this girl?

No, but love will find a way.

All right, then what are we doing back on this hall?

This is where that swordfish swam.

All right, lead on.

- Forward. - I follow.

I--

- Father. - The pansy.

Ohh.

Lady, would you be interested in A trip

through the California orange groves,

taking in the alligator farm, seeing the motion

picture actors at play?

Would you be interested?

It's a blank, Jerry-- a blankeroo.

I told you, no, up in room 614.

Oh, that was you?

We do get around, don't we?

All right, slam it.

- Oh, let's give this up. - You want to find or don't ya?

Yeah, but this as bad as keyhole people.

Oh, we'll be doing that next.

Not me, I don't peek in any keyholes.

Yes, you will.

Oh, Lady.

Oh, gorgeous.

- Oh, beautiful. - What is it?

Ah, would you be interested in a trip

through the California orange groves, stopping

to be alligator farms--

- How do I look, father? - Oh, you look swell.

See the motion picture stars at play.

Very illuminating. Would you be--

I don't think she would, no.

No, maybe you're right.

- This is the end! - Ooh!

- It's father. - A new racket?

No, no, this our regular business.

Yes, we just thought that you good,

kindly folk would be interested in a nice tour

through the California orange groves.

Just a though.

See the movie stars lasting around with the alligators.

It's really ducky. Quite, it's quite.

Yes, what is this trip?

Why it's called the McCullum Auto Tours.

You notice the caps and all.

This is Mr. McCullum himself--

his own dear self.

But you wouldn't be interested,

so if you'll pardon our obtrusiveness,

we'll be running along.

- Ta-ta. - I would be interested.

I'm Mr. McCullum.

Not Chauncey McCullum the great, big auto tour man?

Well, this is nice. Pardon me.

Not this semester, no.

Now, just a minute.

What are you Trying to do Are you trying to make me sore?

Pardon me. Just a minute.

We just came in here for something, while we were here.

Oh!

Pardon me. I'm so sorry.

Well, we ran across an unreasonable husband.

What kind of a hotel is this?

I'm trying to find that out.

No, I'm not.

You can't flirt with my wife.

Ah, ah, ah. Now, contain yourself.

Contain yourself. Ooh!

Now, just a minute.

Fun's fun, but you can't punch my pal twice in the nose.

- I did it, didn't I? - Well, you can't do it anymore.

And you can't flirt my wife!

I wasn't flirting with your wife.

I'm tough!

- You can't be as tough as you look. - I'm tougher!

Oh, we're set to go.

Ah, you!

Well--

Well, well.

We meet again.

And again, a bit ingloriously.

I'll have to apologize for Pollyanna.

I guess he missed his porridge this morning.

Well, what's doing, Joe?

But really, Mildred, or Mabel, or Martha--

whatever your name is-- I can explain everything.

Sir!

Well, mother, this is nice.

Fancy seeing you again.

Are you enjoying your stay here?

And how do you find the orange groves?

And the alligators?

Mother, you must come with me to see the alligators.

- Oh, have we got alligators. - Have we got--

- Ask me if we got alligators. - Have we got alligators?

- Little, bitsy, witsy ones. - And great, big-- you'll love them.

- About that long. - How dare you!

What a hubbub.

- Am-scray? - Hi-ho.

Oh!

I'll be right back, dear.

- Oh please don't misunderstand. - How could we?

Well, won't you let me tell you how it happened?

We're not a bit interested.

Well you see, it is only because I was following beautiful.

I didn't even know that woman out there.

You don't even know us. You're just a masher.

Oh, no, no, no, no. Not at all. Really, I'm not.

Who are you.

Well, you see, my name is Crosby.

Oh, I suppose you're going to tell us you're Bing Crosby?

Well, yes. Yes, that's me, Bing Crosby.

You will now hear Bing Crosby sing,

"Out of Nowhere."

- Have you any more jokes? - Well, that's no joke, really.

Mr. Crosby would be very much flattered if he

knew of your impersonation.

Oh, tut, tut, tut, tut, no impersonation.

That's really one of my records.

I'll bet you have a record, but it wouldn't stand broadcasting.

Well, have it your way.

You came to me from out of nowhere.

You took my heart and found it free.

Wonderful dreams, wonderful schemes from nowhere

made every hour sweet as flower to me.

And if you should go back to your nowhere,

leaving me with my memory, I'll always wait for your return

our of nowhere, hoping you'll bring your love to me.

Now that you've finished your act, run along and sell your bus trips.

Say, you don't believe anything, do ya?

I don't believe you're Bing Crosby.

- Well I am. - Oh yes?

I've been in more battles and fights, had

more narrow escapes from the very jaws

of death trying to meet you.

Well, I'm happy to have met up you.

Love will find a way.

Nuts.

My sense of direction is a little askew.

See you.

Now, you see the kind of a man he is?

Stop your nonsense and put your mind on your fiance,

the marquis.

You have just

heard Bing Crosby sing Out of Nowhere, a phonograph record.

Oh, Mr. Crosby.

Oh, I'm so sorry, I thought you were Bing Crosby.

No, but I'm a great friend of his.

Won't you come in? - Yes.

He acts like you feel after you've been

chasing your husband all night.

Yes.

And I have many a time, but no more.

He's had his last blonde.

- You can't go now. - Why not?

That's the wife.

Well, I can explain my presence here.

But I couldn't. I never can.

This is ridiculous.

I know, but it's better than funerals.

Oh, hello, Bing.

Hello, hello, George.

Hello, Jerry.

Hello, George, how are ya?

Hello, Ethel, dear.

- How long have you been home? - Oh, about an hour.

Uh-huh.

Who have you got hidden in the room?

Oh, lay off, Jerry. Lay off.

No, now, wait a minute.

You know George as well as I do.

He's liable to have--

George is all right.

He's all right.

What is that hair doing on your coat?

Ehh-- You see. A guilty conscience.

Oh, boy, when he gets in the tank, a woman problem

just something terrible.

You got one hidden under here, George?

No?

The closet-- always look in the closet.

- Well, are you satisfied? - Oh, completely.

Why don't you stop, Jerry, please.

He knows better tan to have a woman in this house.

Oh, I can well understand that.

Oh, that's your song, isn't it, Bing?

Why, yes, it is. Yes.

Won't you sing it for us, please?

Oh, I wished you'd you excuse me this afternoon.

I'm a little hoarse.

Oh, come on.

Well, if you want to hear it right now, I'll take a chance.

Oh, Mrs. Please, have you anything

that's good for heartburn?

Yes, I have.

Oh, would you be so kind?

Oh, thank you so much.

I had you.

I held you.

You gave me all, and your love dreams

I shattered beyond recall.

Now, that I'm lost you, please understand, I'm

here forever at your command.

I want you.

I need you, more than you know.

Whatever, don't ever tell me to go.

Once more to have you, love would be grand, to live

forever at your command.

I apologize.

Oh, No apologies, necessary.

I guess it's all right.

I realize how mistakes can happen.

I seem to have been making mistakes all afternoon.

Look.

I'm sorry for them too.

Too you my love, my life, my all, I surrender dear.

Give me room 344, please.

Telephone, sir.

Don't you see I am busy?

It's your sweetheart.

Which one? Your fiance.

Oh.

Hello, sweetheart.

Marquis, I'm sorry, but our engagement's off.

What?

You-- you are joking.

I think I'd like to marry Bing Crosby.

Not if I can help it!

Well, you can help.

Yes, and we're leaving for the minister's right now.

Come and say something nice to the marquis.

- Congratulation. - Oh, isn't that sweet?

Let's go, Jerry, right out.

No, no, not that way-- the marquis,

his sword, your mother--

Where then?

- The fire escape. - OK.

Am-scray. - Hi-ho.

Here we go.

Here!

Oh.

Excuse me, I forgot my fur.

Insect.

Where's my daughter?

Oh, here he is!

Ow!

Ow!

- Where's the fire? - Why we're looking for a minister.

- What's your name? - Bing Crosby.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

If you let us go, I'll be Mrs. Crosby in a few minutes.

That's right.

- So you're Bing Crosby, huh? - Yes, sir.

Sound your

I may seem proud, I may act gay, that's

just a pose, I'm not that way.

'Cause deep down in my heart I say, I surrender, dear.

All right.

We've played a game of stay away,

but it cost more than I can say.

Without--