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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:14,791 --> 00:00:17,381 Let's see you leak on me now, you caulk-sucker. 2 00:00:18,375 --> 00:00:21,745 Get it? I'm caulking the window, and I just called it a caulk-sucker. 3 00:00:21,833 --> 00:00:24,003 You know, not the C-O-C-K sucker, 4 00:00:24,083 --> 00:00:25,963 the C-A-U-L-K sucker. 5 00:00:27,250 --> 00:00:29,420 My fuck, I love caulk… 6 00:00:29,500 --> 00:00:30,330 ing. 7 00:00:34,500 --> 00:00:37,580 Oh, my fuck. Why are you low-riding, Limp Bizkit? 8 00:00:38,583 --> 00:00:41,543 Come here, boy. Please tell me you got something in your back paws. 9 00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:43,075 Please tell me you got a burdock 10 00:00:43,166 --> 00:00:44,666 or a splinter. 11 00:00:44,750 --> 00:00:48,210 Well, here we fucking go. You've got fucking dirty, old arse worms 12 00:00:48,291 --> 00:00:50,581 coming out of you like a Play-Doh Fun Factory. 13 00:01:05,416 --> 00:01:07,576 Somebody's having a good time with himself. 14 00:01:07,666 --> 00:01:09,786 What happened to his cock? Why is his knob missing? 15 00:01:09,875 --> 00:01:12,415 That must have been fucking painful. What? 16 00:01:12,500 --> 00:01:16,000 Dogs don't have knobs like humans. They got fucking lipstick tubes. 17 00:01:16,083 --> 00:01:17,423 Mind your own goddamn business. 18 00:01:17,500 --> 00:01:20,460 Okay, just look away. You're staring at a fucking dog's cock! 19 00:01:20,541 --> 00:01:22,631 I can't help it. Listen to this shit. 20 00:01:22,708 --> 00:01:25,168 Listen to the licking and sucking, it's fucking ridiculous. 21 00:01:25,250 --> 00:01:27,580 Don't you be blowing your dog load all over my leg, either. 22 00:01:27,666 --> 00:01:30,206 Ricky, that's enough. Let go of that fucking thing. 23 00:01:30,958 --> 00:01:32,538 Thank you. It's about fucking time. 24 00:01:32,625 --> 00:01:35,415 I can't believe you're shooting your lips off in the first place. 25 00:01:35,500 --> 00:01:37,630 I know if you could lick your balls in public, 26 00:01:37,708 --> 00:01:40,328 - you'd be fucking doing it right now. - Bullshit. 27 00:01:40,416 --> 00:01:41,916 Well, maybe. 28 00:01:42,333 --> 00:01:43,333 Bubbles? 29 00:01:43,375 --> 00:01:44,285 That's me. 30 00:01:44,375 --> 00:01:46,415 The doctor's ready to see Limp Bizkit now. 31 00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:48,420 Sure you don't want to sneak in this knobless dog 32 00:01:48,458 --> 00:01:50,938 - that's about to blow his load? - Ricky, come on, get in here. 33 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:52,460 What is wrong with you? 34 00:01:52,875 --> 00:01:53,875 Wow. 35 00:01:54,166 --> 00:01:55,456 What do you mean, wow? 36 00:01:55,791 --> 00:01:57,251 That can't be a good "wow." 37 00:01:57,541 --> 00:02:01,251 - Isn't it just worms? Worms get a wow? - The worms I had definitely get a wow. 38 00:02:01,333 --> 00:02:04,383 It's not just a worm, he's got hookworms. Much more dangerous. 39 00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:06,378 What kind of more dangerous? 40 00:02:06,750 --> 00:02:09,710 Hookworms basically eat away at the stomach lining and intestine. 41 00:02:09,791 --> 00:02:12,711 It could be fatal for kittens, if not treated and they could spread. 42 00:02:12,791 --> 00:02:16,211 Fatal. Okay, that's it. Let's get this treated before it spreads. 43 00:02:16,291 --> 00:02:17,581 I agree, my ass is getting itchy 44 00:02:17,666 --> 00:02:20,536 - just looking at these bastards. - Get your fingers out of your hole. 45 00:02:21,041 --> 00:02:22,251 How much for the treatment? 46 00:02:22,333 --> 00:02:24,963 It'll be a few days of boarding, medication. 47 00:02:25,041 --> 00:02:27,041 You're looking at seventeen hundred dollars. 48 00:02:27,125 --> 00:02:28,955 - Seventeen? - Seventeen hundred bucks! 49 00:02:29,041 --> 00:02:31,211 What the fuck! That's quite a chunk of change. 50 00:02:31,291 --> 00:02:33,631 I got rid of mine with a blowtorch and a screwdriver. 51 00:02:33,708 --> 00:02:35,998 You can't use a blowtorch on a kitty! 52 00:02:36,083 --> 00:02:37,003 If you shaved him. 53 00:02:37,083 --> 00:02:39,583 Where in the fuck am I gonna get this kind of money? 54 00:02:39,666 --> 00:02:41,376 I don't know. What do you want to do here? 55 00:02:41,458 --> 00:02:43,208 I want you to fucking figure it out! 56 00:02:43,291 --> 00:02:45,581 You're the one with all the plans. Get planning. 57 00:02:49,125 --> 00:02:51,995 I can't fucking believe we're back here again. 58 00:02:52,291 --> 00:02:54,501 Sam, you here, you cockless cave quiff? 59 00:02:54,583 --> 00:02:56,463 Sam, it's us. You back there? 60 00:02:56,791 --> 00:02:59,421 Hey, boys. How are my buddies doing today? 61 00:03:00,833 --> 00:03:02,253 Good, man. How about you? 62 00:03:02,333 --> 00:03:04,213 Never been better, Julian. 63 00:03:04,291 --> 00:03:07,171 I've got a new partner, who's unbelievable in the sack, 64 00:03:07,250 --> 00:03:09,290 business is great, making money. 65 00:03:09,375 --> 00:03:10,375 Life is perfect. 66 00:03:10,625 --> 00:03:12,495 So, what can I do for my friends today? 67 00:03:12,583 --> 00:03:14,833 My kitty has hookworms, Sam. 68 00:03:14,916 --> 00:03:17,126 Aw, hookworms? Poor little guy. 69 00:03:17,208 --> 00:03:20,378 Those are nasty little fuckers, especially for kittens. 70 00:03:20,458 --> 00:03:22,248 Don't worry, little buddy. 71 00:03:22,333 --> 00:03:24,793 Uncle Sammy will fix you right up. 72 00:03:24,875 --> 00:03:25,875 You will? 73 00:03:26,416 --> 00:03:28,416 Are you on some kind of happy pill, Sam? 74 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:31,540 'Cause, no offense, but you're usually a nasty prick. 75 00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:34,165 No, I'm in love, and you're in luck. 76 00:03:34,250 --> 00:03:37,670 I had an overshipment of drugs years ago, and it's taking up space. 77 00:03:37,750 --> 00:03:40,080 I'm starting to feel like a freaking hoarder! 78 00:03:42,166 --> 00:03:42,996 What the fuck? 79 00:03:43,083 --> 00:03:44,213 -Down! Everybody down! 80 00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:45,671 - Fuck off. - We're down! 81 00:03:45,750 --> 00:03:47,540 - I'm down... - We did nothing. 82 00:03:47,625 --> 00:03:48,455 We're not armed! 83 00:03:48,541 --> 00:03:50,171 Hands on your head. You're under arrest! 84 00:03:50,250 --> 00:03:52,380 I didn't do nothing! What the fuck did I do, Officer? 85 00:03:52,458 --> 00:03:54,418 Illegal trafficking of human testicles. 86 00:03:54,500 --> 00:03:55,670 You sick fuck! 87 00:03:58,583 --> 00:04:01,833 One fucking time I see Sam actually being nice to us, 88 00:04:01,916 --> 00:04:04,246 and he gets arrested selling balls on Amazon. 89 00:04:04,333 --> 00:04:05,883 There's only one other option. 90 00:04:05,958 --> 00:04:08,038 Ricky, get us the fuck out of here. Fast! 91 00:04:08,125 --> 00:04:12,875 Nice. Faster than the curious. 92 00:04:17,833 --> 00:04:19,593 What're you doing? Are we doin' this or what? 93 00:04:19,666 --> 00:04:21,996 Look at your gas needle. It's on E, dummy. 94 00:04:22,083 --> 00:04:24,713 It doesn't even work. I can tell there's gas byhow the car feels. 95 00:04:24,833 --> 00:04:27,913 None of it works. Says I've been out of oil for 6 months. It still runs great. 96 00:04:27,937 --> 00:04:28,785 You can't tell shit. 97 00:04:28,875 --> 00:04:31,125 Listen, we're gonna fill up your fucking car with gas, 98 00:04:31,208 --> 00:04:33,958 rob the place, and that way, we're not gonna fucking run out 99 00:04:34,041 --> 00:04:35,331 trying to get away from here. 100 00:04:35,416 --> 00:04:38,016 Look who's in love with gas all of a sudden. Let's marry some gas. 101 00:04:38,083 --> 00:04:40,213 - Fuck you, Ricky. - Just hold the fuck on here. 102 00:04:40,291 --> 00:04:42,881 You can't just waltz into a gas station and rob it. 103 00:04:42,958 --> 00:04:45,128 - Why not? - Because it's fucked, Ricky. 104 00:04:45,208 --> 00:04:47,208 But this place is easy. People rob it all the time. 105 00:04:47,250 --> 00:04:48,670 What's that, Limp Bizkit? 106 00:04:48,750 --> 00:04:50,290 No, you heard it right, yeah. 107 00:04:50,375 --> 00:04:52,785 We're about to rob a fucking gas station 108 00:04:52,875 --> 00:04:55,165 for your ass worms, like it's no big deal. 109 00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:58,580 Just another fucking thing we do on a regular basis. 110 00:05:01,708 --> 00:05:02,538 Fuck's sakes! 111 00:05:02,625 --> 00:05:04,785 That fucking greaseball beat us to it. 112 00:05:04,833 --> 00:05:06,393 Give me the fucking money. 113 00:05:06,458 --> 00:05:08,498 Please don't hurt me! Take it. It's all they had. 114 00:05:08,583 --> 00:05:10,713 Oh, man, there's not even 100 bucks here. 115 00:05:10,791 --> 00:05:11,831 Let me go, please! 116 00:05:11,916 --> 00:05:13,826 I don't want to go to jail! I'm on house arrest. 117 00:05:13,916 --> 00:05:17,456 Jesus Christ, pal. You wouldn't do well in jail. Go on, beat it. 118 00:05:17,541 --> 00:05:18,541 Thank you, sir. 119 00:05:19,208 --> 00:05:22,668 My name's Brogan McSweeney. I've got to tell you, that was impressive. 120 00:05:22,750 --> 00:05:25,130 Yeah, it would have been impressive if he had more money. 121 00:05:25,208 --> 00:05:27,538 - An actor, are you? - What? An actor? 122 00:05:27,625 --> 00:05:29,575 I see the camera fellas there. 123 00:05:29,666 --> 00:05:32,036 - Was this whole thing staged? - No, man. 124 00:05:32,125 --> 00:05:34,535 They're just following me around, documenting my life. 125 00:05:34,625 --> 00:05:37,165 - Ah, it's a shame. - Oh, yeah? Why is that? 126 00:05:37,250 --> 00:05:39,460 I'm producing the new Clint Eatswood movie in town. 127 00:05:39,541 --> 00:05:40,791 You've got the look we need. 128 00:05:40,875 --> 00:05:43,825 Are you fucking kidding me? Clint's shooting a movie in town? 129 00:05:43,916 --> 00:05:46,166 - He's directing it, yeah. - Oh man, I'm a huge fan. 130 00:05:46,250 --> 00:05:48,920 I always wanted to be in a Clint-Arnie-Stallone kind of movie. 131 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:49,920 What's this one about? 132 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:52,500 Stop trying to pick up Australian dudes. Let's get out of here. 133 00:05:52,583 --> 00:05:55,253 - I'm fucking Irish, man. - Shut the fuck up, Ricky. 134 00:05:55,333 --> 00:05:58,333 It's a wrestling movie starring Sledge. You ever heard of him? 135 00:05:58,416 --> 00:05:59,996 What? Sledge, the wrestler? 136 00:06:00,083 --> 00:06:01,883 Seven-time world heavyweight champ? 137 00:06:01,958 --> 00:06:04,078 No, never fucking heard of him before! 138 00:06:04,166 --> 00:06:06,706 Oh, my God! I'd do anything to be in that movie. 139 00:06:06,791 --> 00:06:08,831 Well, we can always use background performers, 140 00:06:08,916 --> 00:06:11,126 so if you'd like to be in it, bring your friends. 141 00:06:11,208 --> 00:06:12,628 Oh, my God, are you serious? 142 00:06:12,958 --> 00:06:16,878 Boys, we're gonna be in a wrestling movie with the Sledge! 143 00:06:16,958 --> 00:06:18,628 Here's the address. See you in an hour. 144 00:06:20,291 --> 00:06:21,461 According to the internet, 145 00:06:21,541 --> 00:06:24,541 background actors can make up to 200 bucks for the day. 146 00:06:24,625 --> 00:06:26,575 And Julian, if he gets a speaking role, 147 00:06:26,666 --> 00:06:29,126 he could make fucking 12 hundred big ones. 148 00:06:29,208 --> 00:06:31,918 He said every penny's coming to me, towards my kitty. 149 00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:33,790 We heard the news, and we're in, dude. 150 00:06:33,875 --> 00:06:36,415 This sounds exciting. I'm good at playing pretendies. 151 00:06:36,500 --> 00:06:39,830 - Yeah, dude, anything for kitties. - Two high fives coming at you. 152 00:06:39,916 --> 00:06:43,376 Nothing better than your whole family coming together to save the day. 153 00:06:43,458 --> 00:06:44,458 Thanks, fellas. 154 00:06:47,500 --> 00:06:51,380 Okay, boys, remember when I told you anything over a three-second hug is weird? 155 00:06:51,458 --> 00:06:52,288 Yeah, I do. 156 00:06:52,375 --> 00:06:55,495 You're five seconds over. You gotta count, boys. 157 00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:58,958 Stand still, Cory. Don't flinch, Jacob. 158 00:06:59,041 --> 00:07:01,251 Oh, devastating! 159 00:07:03,208 --> 00:07:06,168 Wow, you fellas are really taking this acting thing serious. 160 00:07:06,250 --> 00:07:08,750 Brogan McSweeney said this could start my movie career, man. 161 00:07:08,833 --> 00:07:09,963 Brogan McSweeney? 162 00:07:10,041 --> 00:07:12,581 The BroganMcSweeney? Clint's producer? 163 00:07:12,666 --> 00:07:13,666 Oh, my frig! 164 00:07:14,416 --> 00:07:16,326 I love all of Clint's movies. 165 00:07:16,416 --> 00:07:18,076 They're so real and lifelike. 166 00:07:18,666 --> 00:07:20,286 Since when are you into Clint? 167 00:07:20,375 --> 00:07:21,825 Since when are you, Julian? 168 00:07:21,916 --> 00:07:23,826 Since my entire life, dickhead. 169 00:07:23,916 --> 00:07:26,826 Are you sure I can't come? I can background act, too, guys. 170 00:07:27,291 --> 00:07:30,381 I really need you to look after LB, Randy. Please. 171 00:07:30,458 --> 00:07:32,828 Can't Trin and Sarah look after this little guy? 172 00:07:32,916 --> 00:07:34,076 Just a heads-up, guys. 173 00:07:34,166 --> 00:07:36,786 If you bring that cute, hookworm-infested creature 174 00:07:36,875 --> 00:07:38,415 anywhere near this trailer, 175 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,330 I'm gonna knock you the fuck out! 176 00:07:40,416 --> 00:07:41,496 No offense, Bubbles. 177 00:07:41,583 --> 00:07:43,983 No offense, Randy, but you're not being in the fucking movie. 178 00:07:44,041 --> 00:07:45,171 You look like walrus's shit, 179 00:07:45,250 --> 00:07:47,420 you smell like a moose's bag, and you're dumb as a dead trout 180 00:07:47,500 --> 00:07:49,300 that wasn't even that smart when it was lived. 181 00:07:49,333 --> 00:07:51,253 - That's not very frigging nice. - Fuck you. 182 00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:53,463 No, boys, stop that shit. Okay, it's time. 183 00:07:53,541 --> 00:07:55,581 - Let's go become movie stars. - Yeah! 184 00:07:58,958 --> 00:08:01,668 Boys, I don't get freaked out too often, but holy fuck. 185 00:08:01,750 --> 00:08:05,330 - I'm gonna be in a Clint Eastwood movie. - With your two best friends. 186 00:08:05,416 --> 00:08:08,576 - Well, four best friends, right, dude? - And my two best friends. 187 00:08:08,666 --> 00:08:09,916 I fucking love you guys. 188 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:11,790 - Love you too, Julian. - Yeah, man. 189 00:08:11,875 --> 00:08:15,575 Yo, dude, I'm not the best at counting, but that's got to be three seconds. 190 00:08:15,666 --> 00:08:16,826 No talking, Cory. 191 00:08:17,416 --> 00:08:18,956 - Yeah! - Fancy. 192 00:08:19,041 --> 00:08:22,081 Brogan will be right with you. Help yourself to the food and beverages. 193 00:08:22,166 --> 00:08:24,286 Oh, my God, dudes, it's a dream come true! 194 00:08:24,375 --> 00:08:26,375 Jacob, step back, Free Pop-Tarts! 195 00:08:26,458 --> 00:08:27,458 Pop-Tarts for me! 196 00:08:27,541 --> 00:08:29,041 Oh, I'd love a Pop-Tart. 197 00:08:29,125 --> 00:08:31,125 I haven't eaten in six days. 198 00:08:31,208 --> 00:08:33,288 Hang on now, guys. Which one is Julian? 199 00:08:33,375 --> 00:08:36,415 - Me. - This food is for speaking cast only. 200 00:08:36,500 --> 00:08:39,130 Hi, I'm Randy Lahey, Julian's manager. 201 00:08:39,208 --> 00:08:43,418 This here is Cory Trevorson. He's doing security. 202 00:08:43,500 --> 00:08:45,580 The other two, I'm not sure who the fuck they are. 203 00:08:45,666 --> 00:08:46,956 I'm Jacob. This is Cory. 204 00:08:47,041 --> 00:08:49,171 We're in something called background? 205 00:08:49,250 --> 00:08:52,210 Okay guys, I'll have to take you down to background holding. 206 00:08:52,291 --> 00:08:53,381 Come with me, please. 207 00:08:53,791 --> 00:08:55,251 Put the food down. 208 00:08:55,541 --> 00:08:56,421 Spit that out! 209 00:08:57,666 --> 00:08:59,786 Nice going, Ricky. Fucking management? 210 00:08:59,875 --> 00:09:01,205 We might not get paid now. 211 00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:03,531 We're gonna have to take our money's worth in food, then. 212 00:09:03,583 --> 00:09:06,003 This isn't about you getting your money's worth of food, 213 00:09:06,083 --> 00:09:08,583 it's about getting cash to save my kitty's life! 214 00:09:08,666 --> 00:09:09,876 Nice, look at that. 215 00:09:09,958 --> 00:09:11,518 Good to see you getting into character. 216 00:09:11,583 --> 00:09:14,673 Uh, yes, sir, that was all acting right there. 217 00:09:14,750 --> 00:09:16,670 Taking this one hundred percent serious. 218 00:09:17,041 --> 00:09:18,291 When do we meet Sledge? 219 00:09:18,375 --> 00:09:20,175 We'll be ready for you on set in five minutes. 220 00:09:20,250 --> 00:09:21,420 Fucking right on. 221 00:09:21,500 --> 00:09:24,170 Great job on the cheese sandwiches, too. 222 00:09:24,250 --> 00:09:27,080 Okay, guys, you may as well get naked and work up a pump. 223 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:29,250 We'll be shooting your scene soon, 224 00:09:29,333 --> 00:09:31,543 so, if you could come to set hard, it'd be great. 225 00:09:32,166 --> 00:09:33,916 Uh, why is everyone naked, dude? 226 00:09:34,041 --> 00:09:35,041 I don't know. 227 00:09:35,166 --> 00:09:36,746 And why do we have to get hard? 228 00:09:36,833 --> 00:09:37,833 I don't know. 229 00:09:38,458 --> 00:09:39,958 Uh, excuse me, guys. 230 00:09:40,041 --> 00:09:43,631 I think we left something… important out in the car. 231 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,458 Yeah, we did for sure, dudes. 232 00:09:49,750 --> 00:09:52,080 Oh, my fuck, look at the way he works the ring. 233 00:09:52,666 --> 00:09:53,826 What a professional. 234 00:09:53,916 --> 00:09:55,416 He's something else, isn't he? 235 00:09:55,500 --> 00:09:58,080 Method acting. Taking it seriously, Brando-style. 236 00:09:58,166 --> 00:10:01,746 And he is gonna be counting on you big-time, Julian. Big-time. 237 00:10:01,833 --> 00:10:04,583 No problem.What do you want me to do? Do I get a script? 238 00:10:04,666 --> 00:10:07,376 So, I told Clint about that little incident today, 239 00:10:07,458 --> 00:10:09,788 and he wants it to be raw. He wants it to be natural. 240 00:10:09,875 --> 00:10:11,455 So, just use your instincts, man. 241 00:10:11,541 --> 00:10:13,061 Get in there, show us wrestling moves. 242 00:10:13,666 --> 00:10:15,076 Wrestling moves? 243 00:10:15,166 --> 00:10:18,076 I don't know any wrestling moves. I can fight fight, though. 244 00:10:18,166 --> 00:10:20,536 Green Bastard knows all the wrestling moves, sir. 245 00:10:20,625 --> 00:10:24,165 Piledriver, backbreaker, facebuster, 246 00:10:24,250 --> 00:10:27,540 DDT, high-fly off the ropes. I know everything. 247 00:10:27,625 --> 00:10:29,745 That's okay, Bubs, I think I can figure this out, man. 248 00:10:30,166 --> 00:10:31,076 Fucking perfect. 249 00:10:31,166 --> 00:10:33,686 I'll hold your drink. You get in there and show us what you got. 250 00:10:33,750 --> 00:10:35,510 Is there a problem here? 251 00:10:35,541 --> 00:10:37,671 Do not touch the drink. The drink stays. 252 00:10:37,750 --> 00:10:40,250 Uh, it might be an insurance or a creative problem. 253 00:10:40,333 --> 00:10:41,173 You sure about that? 254 00:10:41,250 --> 00:10:43,830 Yeah, one hundred percent sure. It's a deal-breaker, actually. 255 00:10:43,916 --> 00:10:47,576 Look, I think we should talkto Clint about this. Follow me. 256 00:10:48,416 --> 00:10:51,496 Bubs, what the fuck was that all about? "I can do all these wrestling moves." 257 00:10:51,583 --> 00:10:53,923 What? Are you trying to crush my fucking dreams here, man? 258 00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:56,290 I can do all the fucking moves, and you can't. 259 00:10:56,666 --> 00:10:59,036 Sorry, it was the Green Bastard talking, but he… 260 00:10:59,250 --> 00:11:02,580 said, because he knows he has far superior skills to you in the ring. 261 00:11:02,666 --> 00:11:06,456 It's not just about big muscles, you know. There's skill involved. 262 00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:08,141 We need to talk to you about this movie. 263 00:11:08,165 --> 00:11:09,995 Yeah, we saw naked men. 264 00:11:10,083 --> 00:11:12,723 They were shiny and oiled up. They looked good and everything, but… 265 00:11:12,791 --> 00:11:14,791 It's a wrestling movie, you fucking dummy! 266 00:11:14,875 --> 00:11:16,995 Get the fuck out of my way. We're about to meet Clint. 267 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:18,580 Julian, I'd like you to meet Clint. 268 00:11:18,666 --> 00:11:20,956 Clint, this is the guy I was telling you about. 269 00:11:21,041 --> 00:11:22,381 Julian, Clint. Clint, Julian. 270 00:11:22,458 --> 00:11:23,748 Whoa, holy shit! 271 00:11:24,208 --> 00:11:26,958 Sorry, sir, I just kinda thought you were a little bit taller. 272 00:11:27,041 --> 00:11:29,001 Back in my acting days, 273 00:11:29,083 --> 00:11:30,543 I would've made your day… 274 00:11:30,875 --> 00:11:31,705 punk. 275 00:11:31,791 --> 00:11:33,081 - Huh? - So, he wants to keep 276 00:11:33,166 --> 00:11:35,626 the drink in the shot. Is that a problem, sir? 277 00:11:35,708 --> 00:11:39,828 Well, it might be a continuity nightmare with the spillage. 278 00:11:40,250 --> 00:11:42,580 Oh, look, if he can't do it, I sure as fuck can! 279 00:11:42,666 --> 00:11:44,166 Green Bastard from parts unknown. 280 00:11:44,250 --> 00:11:46,330 - Nice to meet you, sir. - Bubs, that's enough. 281 00:11:46,416 --> 00:11:48,246 I won't spill a drop, sir, I promise. 282 00:11:48,333 --> 00:11:50,833 Okay, let's give it a shot then. 283 00:11:50,916 --> 00:11:53,826 Okay, folks, we're gonna roll. Quiet, please! 284 00:11:53,916 --> 00:11:54,916 Okay. 285 00:11:55,208 --> 00:11:58,128 I really want to feel this from the heart, guys. 286 00:11:58,416 --> 00:11:59,416 Rolling! 287 00:12:03,166 --> 00:12:04,996 I can't fight you like this anymore. 288 00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:06,291 I can't fight… 289 00:12:06,458 --> 00:12:07,708 my love for you. 290 00:12:07,875 --> 00:12:10,415 What? Your love for me? 291 00:12:10,791 --> 00:12:12,791 Oh, my God, Ricky, look at the name. 292 00:12:13,416 --> 00:12:14,956 What? Clint Eastwood. 293 00:12:15,041 --> 00:12:17,211 No, separate the words, Ricky. 294 00:12:17,458 --> 00:12:18,578 "Eats wood." 295 00:12:18,708 --> 00:12:20,748 Oh, my fuck, I get it. 296 00:12:20,833 --> 00:12:22,503 Isn't that like a gay porn name? 297 00:12:22,583 --> 00:12:24,753 - Yes, it's a gay porn name! - What is? 298 00:12:24,833 --> 00:12:27,633 Ricky, they're making a gay porno movie right now! 299 00:12:27,708 --> 00:12:29,378 - Where? - In front of us! 300 00:12:29,458 --> 00:12:31,078 This is a gay porno set! 301 00:12:31,166 --> 00:12:33,326 We tried to tell you, dudes! 302 00:12:35,208 --> 00:12:36,248 Don't fight it. 303 00:12:36,333 --> 00:12:39,133 I need to feel your warm body on top of mine. 304 00:12:39,208 --> 00:12:42,288 Whoa, don't fucking touch me. What the fuck are you doing, man? 305 00:12:42,375 --> 00:12:44,625 Okay, I've had enough. I need a break here. 306 00:12:44,708 --> 00:12:46,378 A break from our relationship? 307 00:12:46,458 --> 00:12:48,788 But I feel like it's just starting to burn. 308 00:12:48,875 --> 00:12:52,075 Okay, I'm done here. I'm done. I don't know what the fuck's going on. 309 00:12:52,166 --> 00:12:53,576 Cut! Check the gate! 310 00:12:53,666 --> 00:12:55,876 That was beautiful.So real. 311 00:12:56,166 --> 00:12:57,376 We got that one. 312 00:12:59,541 --> 00:13:00,921 Oh, my fuck, boys. 313 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,360 I almost feel bad about how much more food I'm about to eat. 314 00:13:03,416 --> 00:13:06,036 Listen, Bubs, I know acting with Sledge is a dream of yours, 315 00:13:06,125 --> 00:13:08,455 and you do know a shit-ton of wrestling moves. 316 00:13:08,750 --> 00:13:11,290 - I want to make that happen for you, bud. - Oh, is that right? 317 00:13:11,375 --> 00:13:13,135 - You wanna make my dreams come true? - Yeah. 318 00:13:13,208 --> 00:13:16,128 And it's got nothing to do with the fact that you just realized 319 00:13:16,208 --> 00:13:18,128 you're starring in a gay porno film? 320 00:13:18,208 --> 00:13:21,078 Julian, nice scene! I really felt it out there with you, man. 321 00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:23,580 Sledge, I don't know how to ask you this, but... 322 00:13:23,666 --> 00:13:26,496 How did I transition from wrestling to acting? 323 00:13:26,583 --> 00:13:30,173 It's a long story, but it happened right after my injury. 324 00:13:30,625 --> 00:13:34,245 I went to a very dark place, and after years of debauchery, 325 00:13:34,333 --> 00:13:38,213 I found myself in a high-stakes celebrity game of Dungeons & Dragons 326 00:13:38,291 --> 00:13:39,961 to alleviate the depression, and… 327 00:13:40,041 --> 00:13:42,461 well, find the thrill that was gone from my life. 328 00:13:42,958 --> 00:13:45,128 Unfortunately, I bet my entire life savings 329 00:13:45,208 --> 00:13:49,248 against David Hasselhoff, Chevy Chase, Betty White, and Bananarama… 330 00:13:49,708 --> 00:13:50,998 and lost. 331 00:13:51,083 --> 00:13:52,793 Come on! Bananarama? 332 00:13:52,875 --> 00:13:55,785 Huh, yeah. And that led to Betty White interfering 333 00:13:55,875 --> 00:13:58,125 with an unsuccessful four-way with Bananarama 334 00:13:58,208 --> 00:14:01,038 and me being forced into a short career in Turkish ditch fighting. 335 00:14:01,125 --> 00:14:03,745 I hit rock bottom, guys. 336 00:14:03,833 --> 00:14:06,883 That's when I saw Clint's ad in the paper. Pretty fucked up, huh? 337 00:14:07,333 --> 00:14:11,003 Well, yeah, but I was kinda talking about the type of movie this is. 338 00:14:11,083 --> 00:14:13,753 A soft gay porn? Well, look, it's no different 339 00:14:13,833 --> 00:14:16,333 than Michael C. Hall kissing men in Six Feet Under, 340 00:14:16,416 --> 00:14:18,036 Brokeback Mountain, Shameless. 341 00:14:18,125 --> 00:14:19,575 None of those guys are gay. 342 00:14:19,666 --> 00:14:21,036 I'm not gay either. 343 00:14:21,125 --> 00:14:23,785 We could all get our big non-gay break from this. 344 00:14:23,875 --> 00:14:26,625 Man, I don't know, man. I don't know if I could do this. 345 00:14:26,875 --> 00:14:29,665 It'll be easy. I just have to come up from behind you 346 00:14:29,750 --> 00:14:30,920 and pretend I'm going in. 347 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,380 Oh, my fuck. 348 00:14:32,750 --> 00:14:34,880 No, it's not so bad. 349 00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:37,078 I just think about things that get me hard, 350 00:14:37,166 --> 00:14:40,246 throw on a cock sock, and slide along your taint a little bit. 351 00:14:40,333 --> 00:14:43,043 You just have to get in character, man. It's art. 352 00:14:43,125 --> 00:14:44,995 Okay, I'm out. I can't do this, Bubs. 353 00:14:45,083 --> 00:14:46,883 I was only doing this for your kitty. 354 00:14:46,958 --> 00:14:49,128 - This is too much, though. - Julian, please! 355 00:14:49,208 --> 00:14:52,378 Hey, you're gonna have to take my place. You are the Green Bastard, aren't ya? 356 00:14:52,458 --> 00:14:54,038 The Green Bastard? 357 00:14:54,125 --> 00:14:54,995 Whoa, now! 358 00:14:55,083 --> 00:14:57,503 This actually might be better. 359 00:14:57,583 --> 00:14:59,463 Well, just hang on. Wait, now. 360 00:14:59,541 --> 00:15:02,541 - I'll go talk to Clint. - Boys, I really don't think I can do this. 361 00:15:02,625 --> 00:15:05,575 I don't think I can pretend to be gay for my kitty. 362 00:15:05,666 --> 00:15:08,076 I'm so conflicted. 363 00:15:08,166 --> 00:15:10,956 Am I a horrible, terrible father? 364 00:15:12,250 --> 00:15:15,290 Come here, pussy. 365 00:15:15,375 --> 00:15:17,375 Poor little guy. He must be so uncomfortable. 366 00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:21,418 Randy, he's gonna rub his little arse right down to the bone. Get him down! 367 00:15:21,500 --> 00:15:25,250 Psst, here, Limpy. Come to Uncle Randers. 368 00:15:25,333 --> 00:15:26,923 This is no frigging use. 369 00:15:27,208 --> 00:15:29,458 He frigging hates me. Psst. 370 00:15:29,541 --> 00:15:30,541 Oh, here he comes. 371 00:15:30,958 --> 00:15:31,958 That's it, Limpy. 372 00:15:32,541 --> 00:15:33,461 Come here. 373 00:15:33,541 --> 00:15:35,671 Frig! That stings! 374 00:15:37,708 --> 00:15:39,538 Frig! It stings! 375 00:15:39,958 --> 00:15:41,788 That's it. We're calling Bubbles. 376 00:15:41,875 --> 00:15:44,495 Randy, just spread a little cottage cheese on a cracker, 377 00:15:44,583 --> 00:15:46,633 and he'll be all over it like stink on a monkey. 378 00:15:46,708 --> 00:15:48,918 Oh, and if you see an old diaper of Mo's kicking around, 379 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:51,130 put that on him, in case he gets the shits. 380 00:15:51,375 --> 00:15:53,535 I'll be there as soon as I can. 381 00:15:53,625 --> 00:15:56,625 I never thought I'd ever utter these words in my life, but… 382 00:15:56,708 --> 00:15:59,708 looks like I'm gonna do soft-core gay pornography with Sledge 383 00:15:59,791 --> 00:16:02,421 in order to eradicate hookworms out of my kitty's arse. 384 00:16:02,500 --> 00:16:06,080 Okay, Green Bastard, pretend you're packing up your gym bag, 385 00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:07,666 and Sledge will walk in. 386 00:16:07,916 --> 00:16:09,126 And what do I say? 387 00:16:09,208 --> 00:16:12,668 Just respond to whatever he says. I want it to feel real. 388 00:16:12,916 --> 00:16:13,916 Action! 389 00:16:14,833 --> 00:16:18,173 Hey, I just broke up with my man and could use a little consoling. 390 00:16:18,458 --> 00:16:19,878 Why leave so soon? 391 00:16:19,958 --> 00:16:22,288 Uh, have to, stove's on. 392 00:16:22,375 --> 00:16:25,205 Could burn the place down. Left it on. Goodbye. 393 00:16:25,291 --> 00:16:27,251 Well, I don't want you to go. 394 00:16:28,750 --> 00:16:30,790 Oh, yeah? Why is that, now? 395 00:16:31,083 --> 00:16:32,883 - Because I'm single now. - Uh-huh. 396 00:16:32,958 --> 00:16:38,418 And I'd really like to get a look at that hot, wet, back pussy of yours. 397 00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:39,830 Yeah, okay, cut! Nope. 398 00:16:39,916 --> 00:16:41,706 Sorry, thought I could do this, 399 00:16:41,791 --> 00:16:44,211 but I don't thinkl'm cut out for this type of film. 400 00:16:44,291 --> 00:16:45,711 Cut! 401 00:16:46,791 --> 00:16:49,711 What the bloody fuck is going on here? 402 00:16:49,791 --> 00:16:51,831 Brogan, deal with this. 403 00:16:51,916 --> 00:16:53,376 I got to squeeze out a deuce. 404 00:16:53,458 --> 00:16:54,918 We're taking an early lunch. 405 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,040 You have one hour to get your shite together, 406 00:16:57,125 --> 00:16:59,415 or I recast all of you, you fucking cunts! 407 00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:02,250 Well, we're in a real fucking pickle here, boys. 408 00:17:02,333 --> 00:17:04,543 We better find someone to pretend-fuck him, 409 00:17:04,625 --> 00:17:06,075 or my kitty is gonna die. 410 00:17:06,166 --> 00:17:07,956 Here. 411 00:17:08,083 --> 00:17:10,883 - Frig! - What are you doing up there, Randy? 412 00:17:10,958 --> 00:17:13,378 Nobody in the park has frigging cottage cheese, 413 00:17:13,458 --> 00:17:14,458 and he hates me. 414 00:17:14,541 --> 00:17:16,791 Just hang on. This is how it's done. 415 00:17:16,875 --> 00:17:20,375 Here, kitty. Come here, kitty. 416 00:17:20,791 --> 00:17:22,131 Here, kitty! 417 00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:23,746 It's okay, boy. 418 00:17:23,833 --> 00:17:26,753 Daddy's here with the tickle sticks. Everything's gonna be alright. 419 00:17:26,833 --> 00:17:28,083 Who's got your belly? 420 00:17:28,166 --> 00:17:29,666 Wow, that's amazing. 421 00:17:30,541 --> 00:17:32,671 Y'all done filming, guys? How'd it go? 422 00:17:32,750 --> 00:17:35,750 Uh, funny you mention that, Randy. 423 00:17:35,833 --> 00:17:37,713 You in an acting kind of mood, bud? 424 00:17:37,791 --> 00:17:38,791 What do you mean? 425 00:17:39,041 --> 00:17:40,081 You know, we got thinking, 426 00:17:40,166 --> 00:17:42,626 and it's not right for us to deprive you to be in this movie. 427 00:17:42,708 --> 00:17:44,078 Do you wanna be in a Clint movie? 428 00:17:44,166 --> 00:17:46,456 Well, I thought I was too ugly and stinky. 429 00:17:46,541 --> 00:17:48,791 And dumb. Don't forget about the dumb part. 430 00:17:48,875 --> 00:17:50,245 Ricky, smarten the fuck up. 431 00:17:50,333 --> 00:17:52,463 - You wanna be in Clint's movie or what? - What? 432 00:17:52,541 --> 00:17:53,881 Are you frigging serious? 433 00:17:53,958 --> 00:17:56,328 Yeah, serious, Randy. There's one catch, though. 434 00:17:56,416 --> 00:17:58,996 You have to wear the Green Bastard suit. He has to think it's me. 435 00:17:59,083 --> 00:18:01,423 But I'm allergic to fabric, you know that. 436 00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:04,250 Who knows what will happen if I had a full bodysuit on. 437 00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:07,213 Come on, please, Randy. I really need you to do this, bud. 438 00:18:07,291 --> 00:18:09,881 And there's a second catch. You gotta give us the money 439 00:18:09,958 --> 00:18:11,708 - you're gonna make from it. - What? 440 00:18:11,833 --> 00:18:14,713 Look, Randy, Limp Bizkit's gonna die, okay? 441 00:18:14,791 --> 00:18:16,541 I'm desperate here, bud. Please! 442 00:18:16,625 --> 00:18:18,665 I don't know, guys. What's in it for me? 443 00:18:18,750 --> 00:18:20,880 Well, I'll tell ya what's in it for you. 444 00:18:20,958 --> 00:18:22,578 Us being your buddies again. 445 00:18:22,958 --> 00:18:24,418 Forever. Right, boys? 446 00:18:24,916 --> 00:18:26,286 Boys! Right? 447 00:18:26,583 --> 00:18:29,673 Fuck's sakes, all right. I'll do it, but I'm not happy about it. 448 00:18:29,750 --> 00:18:31,080 Okay, I'll do it. 449 00:18:31,583 --> 00:18:34,543 - I'm in! - Yeah, you're gonna be in, all right. 450 00:18:34,958 --> 00:18:36,248 Decent! Thanks, Randy! 451 00:18:36,333 --> 00:18:38,673 I'll go grab an old pair of my glasses for you. 452 00:18:40,541 --> 00:18:42,581 Quiet, please! 453 00:18:43,458 --> 00:18:45,998 My name is Bubbles, and I love kitties. 454 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:47,785 How did that sound, guys? 455 00:18:47,875 --> 00:18:49,745 I don't sound like Scooby-Doo, Randy. 456 00:18:49,833 --> 00:18:51,383 Just try not to talk, Randy. 457 00:18:51,458 --> 00:18:52,748 Guys, we're ready on set. 458 00:18:54,666 --> 00:18:55,666 Action! 459 00:18:55,750 --> 00:18:58,630 - Hey, where do you think you're going? - Oh, nowhere. 460 00:18:58,708 --> 00:19:00,378 Just tidying up my things. 461 00:19:00,458 --> 00:19:01,828 I like to be tidy. 462 00:19:01,916 --> 00:19:03,286 Well, that's good, then. 463 00:19:03,375 --> 00:19:08,875 I may need to drown my sorrows by drowning you in my hot ball broth. 464 00:19:08,958 --> 00:19:12,128 You came to the right place because I just finished working out 465 00:19:12,208 --> 00:19:14,538 and I'm pretty frigging moist. 466 00:19:14,625 --> 00:19:15,625 Oh, hey! 467 00:19:16,041 --> 00:19:18,711 You wanna get a little something happening here, 468 00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:21,671 do you, big fella? 469 00:19:21,750 --> 00:19:25,080 How does my monster truck feel in your little tiny garage? 470 00:19:25,166 --> 00:19:26,166 What are you doing? 471 00:19:26,708 --> 00:19:27,878 You're not even in. 472 00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:35,790 There we go. That's better. 473 00:19:35,875 --> 00:19:39,745 - I'm tapping out! - Hold it. 474 00:19:41,541 --> 00:19:43,831 Cut! Check the gates. 475 00:19:43,916 --> 00:19:45,376 That was the one. 476 00:19:45,458 --> 00:19:48,208 Holy shit, that was really good. Really good acting. 477 00:19:48,291 --> 00:19:50,671 I think only one of them was acting. 478 00:19:52,541 --> 00:19:55,331 Holy shit, boys. We've got 1,900 bucks here. 479 00:19:55,416 --> 00:19:56,536 Yes, baby! 480 00:19:56,625 --> 00:20:00,125 Limp Bizkit's hole is gonna be all pink and clean like a baby's heart! 481 00:20:00,208 --> 00:20:02,328 Okay, how are we gonna split up the extra two hundy? 482 00:20:02,416 --> 00:20:04,576 I say we spend the whole thing on a big chunk of hash. 483 00:20:04,666 --> 00:20:07,826 Nope, fuck that. My cut is not going towards hash. 484 00:20:08,291 --> 00:20:10,671 Some extra cat food would come in handy, though. 485 00:20:10,750 --> 00:20:12,710 Wouldn't it, little buddy? 486 00:20:13,291 --> 00:20:14,961 Holy shit, check you out. 487 00:20:15,041 --> 00:20:17,802 What? Do ya got the chicken bops, or were you blowing the fucking sun? 488 00:20:17,826 --> 00:20:19,171 - Ricky! - What? 489 00:20:19,250 --> 00:20:20,880 How's the rash feeling, Randy? 490 00:20:20,958 --> 00:20:23,458 I'm just airing it out. It'll be fine, though. 491 00:20:23,541 --> 00:20:25,831 I just hope my date doesn't get grossed out by it. 492 00:20:25,916 --> 00:20:26,916 Date? 493 00:20:27,208 --> 00:20:29,418 Oh, Randy's got a hot date, does he? 494 00:20:29,875 --> 00:20:32,455 I'm really frigging nervous. I hope it goes well. 495 00:20:32,541 --> 00:20:35,081 - You know what will make it go well? - What, Julian? Tell me! 496 00:20:35,166 --> 00:20:36,166 Here, bud. 497 00:20:36,541 --> 00:20:38,041 Seriously? For me? 498 00:20:38,458 --> 00:20:40,288 That was really nice of you, Julian. 499 00:20:40,375 --> 00:20:43,125 I mean, we did promise him friendship, and money counts. 500 00:20:43,208 --> 00:20:46,078 What the fuck are you doing? Why the fuck should he get the 200 bucks? 501 00:20:46,166 --> 00:20:49,496 Come on, Ricky, he did all the hard work when you think about it. 502 00:20:49,583 --> 00:20:51,383 The hard work. 503 00:20:51,458 --> 00:20:53,708 Some people might say he worked his ass off. 504 00:20:54,083 --> 00:20:55,503 Sorry, Randy. 505 00:20:56,250 --> 00:20:57,540 What in the Christ? 506 00:20:57,708 --> 00:20:58,538 Sledge? 507 00:20:58,625 --> 00:21:01,785 We're going out for burgers and to see where the night takes us. 508 00:21:01,875 --> 00:21:04,535 Well, good luck, Randy. You did good today, buddy. 509 00:21:04,625 --> 00:21:05,625 Thanks, Julian. 510 00:21:06,375 --> 00:21:08,785 Today's been a really weird fucking day, boys. 511 00:21:09,291 --> 00:21:11,541 Yeah, weird as fuck. 512 00:21:11,625 --> 00:21:13,035 Hey, let's get some burgers. 513 00:21:13,125 --> 00:21:14,455 - My treat. - Yes. 514 00:22:33,208 --> 00:22:38,788 Oh, fuck. 515 00:22:38,875 --> 00:22:40,285 Jesus Christ! 516 00:22:46,541 --> 00:22:47,581 Fuck off. 40886

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