All language subtitles for National.Treasure.S01E01.HDTV.TLA.en

Jesus, please...

- Mr Finchley?
- Oh. Time's up.

Let's go.

And also the fact that it
wasn't down to an audience voting.

It was a small room full of
experts who actually know

what they're talking about.
That's what makes it special.

So anyway, thank you
very much, thank you.

- Well done.
- Thanks!

It's really
good to meet you. Big fan.

- Is he supposed to be nice?
- Very.

Ladies and gentlemen,

- it's now...
- Not one of those shaggers, then?

- No. He's married, I think.
- ... my honour to bring to the stage

... the presenter of the final award.

You'll know him
as Bull's-eye Bill.

He is, of course, the man,

- Oh, shit, shit, shit.
- ... the legend, Paul Finchley!

No need. Really. Honestly, no need.

Because I am not receiving
the Lifetime Achievement Award.

Aww!

I am, however, presenting it.

So think of me as John the Baptist
paving the way for Jesus Christ.

Sorry, Mrs, but if you think
that that's blasphemous,

you should've heard what I said
when I found out who had won it.

What can I say about this man?

He's a man I spent
most of my life beside.

A man best known to you,
and to me as... as...

Karl!

Yes, yes!

Not yet, mate! Not yet!

He was described in The Guardian

as the natural successor
to David Jason,

and by David Jason

as "the man who takes
all the jobs I turn down".

In his later years, he's added acting

to his many talents,
and proper acting, mind you,

none of the dicking about
he and I used to do, no.

Indeed, he was hugely
praised in The Times

for his epic performance
as Richard III.

Make the joke about them
preferring my bottom!

The winner of this award, and I can
say this, ladies and gentlemen,

because he has absolutely
no idea he's getting it...

is a...

- Devastatingly handsome!
- devastatingly handsome...

Wholesomely kind,
wonderful, generous.

He's...

Play the game, mate.
There's people watching.

He's kind, apparently, and generous.

He's got an arse
that can crack nuts.

And he's got an arse
that can crack... What?!

He's got an arse
that can crack coconuts.

Ladies and gentlemen.

The only man I know who's vain
enough to invade his own stage.

And the winner of this year's
Lifetime Achievement Award,

I give you, and you are
very welcome to him,

the one, the only,

Sir Karl Jenkins.

- That went well.
- Livened things up. Coconuts!

- You look good.
- Yeah, I take Viagra

before every
stage performance these days.

Put some colour in my cheeks.

That and the very, very tight pants,
of course. That's my secret.

Never could tell
when you were joking.

Neither could most of the audience!

You look tired.

Oh.

Is Marie not in tonight?

Well, it's not as if I was
getting the award, is it?

Do you want it? You can have it.

They gave it to you!

Yeah, but it's for both our work.

Magnanimity was always
a stretch for you, wasn't it?

I really need a piss.
Have I got time for a piss?

The trouble is,
you're the last award. After this...

Oh, he can hold it in. He's got...

exceptional bladder control
for a man of his age.

- If you want to go, Paul?
- Really, you don't need me?

I think they got your quotes
already, don't you?

Ah. Well in that case,
I shall have a piss

and pity poor Karl here.

Karl, honestly,

truly deserved.

It's nonsense.

It's all nonsense.

- Hey.
- Hey! Loved your speech!

Well, I thought it was important
that Karl got all the big laughs.

- Huge fan by the way.
- Oh, likewise.

I grew up watching your routines.

That was a long time ago now.

Well, with repeat fees,
nothing's a long time ago.

- I'm having similar thoughts.
- Simon.

How unlike you to find
the bit with the scorchers.

- She's dating Greg Davies.
- She's not.

And saying "scorchers" makes you
sound about 450.

Shall we dance?

Do let's.

Paul!

Great speech, mate!
And what a great event. Simon.

Tom's too rude to introduce me,
and my manager's too shit,

so I must introduce myself,
I'm Paul Finchley.

Sir, you're a legend,

you've no need to introduce
yourself to anyone in this room.

- You'll go far.
- Oh.

He already has. He's just taken over
as Director of Data.

Fuck it. They get younger and
younger. Well done, young man, sir.

Shit. You called me "sir" -
well, I must call you "Lord".

Well done, Lord Television.
I'm pretty sure that...

Are you my boss?

Will you do it?

Will you do it for us?
Go on! Be a mate!

Milk's sour? Not surprised.

But then them cows
are a moody bunch.

- Right? That's great, that's genius.
- Oh, thank you, yeah.

I've said it before,
I'll say it again.

Black tie suits you.

And may I say, Dan,

no-one looks better holding a bin.

Hello, bunny. Get them to sleep OK?

I couldn't get Billy off that
damn game thing, but, yeah.

Hmm.

Alan Carr was excellent, actually.
What a lovely man.

I always thought you
should be on that show.

I know, darling. You said.
But I don't really...

I don't think
people see me that way, do they?

At what point...

do comics stop being
funny and start being sweet?

Hmm? Even Spike.
They even did it to Spike.

They even turned Spike sweet.

And he was an awful shite.

You bad woman!

- Anyone else worth talking to?
- Not a soul.

Nope.

I always think after
these events, you know,

and think I made
a total arse of myself.

Well, it was a nice big clap, though.

Yeah. It means nothing, though.
That's the Stalin thing, isn't it?

No-one wants to be the first
to stop clapping the Old Guard.

- Karl got a bigger one anyway.
- Oh!

***

I just can't help thinking

that I made an awful fool of myself.

And I think that
you've still got whisky

sloshing around in
that gut of yours.

I'll get you a banana,
and then we'll get into bed, OK?

Naughty cat.

You know she doesn't
like you up there.

- Good morning, my wee jobbies.
- We watched you on the TV!

Oh, yeah?
What did you think?

- You were funny!
- He got all the big laughs.

Grandma laughed loads.

Yeah?

Good morning, Billy.

You free today?

I'm dropping these to their dad's

and then I've got
lunch with Anapolis.

They might contribute
to the foundation.

Beware Greeks bearing gifts.

You say that every time!
They're American.

I always thought mornings
suited you.

- Did I ever tell you that?
- More or less every day.

Are you winning at least?

- It's not about winning.
- Ah.

It's about taking part? Hmm?

So, what's the plan for today?
Morning jog?

Lunch in town?

Aerobics classes?

Mass scientific experiment?

Or are you going to just lounge
around here all day doing nothing...

... again?

I'll get it!

- Mrs Finchley?
- Yes?

My name is DI Palmer,
this is DS Georgeson.

We're here for a word
with your husband.

A word about what?

There's been an allegation
of rape made against you.

This is a warrant for
a search of your premises.

Is this some kind of joke?

Grandad?

It's all right, buddy.
It's all right, son.

Phone Simon.

Now, what's going on?

We weren't aware your grandchildren
were in the house.

Can your wife arrange
alternative care?

I want to make this as
easy as possible for you.

Sorry, um,
you're accusing me of what?

Belt on, if you could.

Paul, hi. Jerome.

Simon sent me. Needless to say, it's
an honour to be working with you.

I love you work.

He says you're the best.

Let's hope I grow to love your work.

This is Jimmy Savile. They think
I'm Jimmy-fucking-Savile.

- OK, so here's where we are.
- No-one liked him.

Always kept him
well away from the parties.

He wanted to come.

It was me. I said,
"Fuck, no, no way."

Everybody knew he was dodgy,

everybody, but I'm the one that had
cops outside the house,

my grandchildren inside.

We don't have much time,
so save the bluster

and just listen, if you could.

We don't know what they know or what
they think they know,

but I'll tell you this... they won't
be getting any clues

from our end.

So, say as little as possible.

Clues?

I didn't do this.

Big fan, by the way.

Every Christmas,
it's a bit of a tradition,

work through the whole of Crooked
Peaks, all 36 episodes.

- Thank you.
- Absolutely hilarious.

Was the stutter difficult to do?

Well,
it's not what I went to RADA for.

And now you've got your own
game show. Yes.

We call it a quiz.

OK, let's start at the beginning.

Full name, please.

Paul Thomas Finchley.

And date of birth?

9th of February, 1950.

And you have children.

Yes, a daughter, Danielle. Dee.

And she's had children.

Yes. Billy is 14 and Francis is ten.

- And they live with their father.
- Yes.

Why is that?

Erm...

Dee's had a pretty
rough time recently.

She's in a treatment
centre for addiction.

Halfway house.

- And your parents, they're deceased?
- Yes.

- Cillian and Molly Finchley.
- That's right.

- Oh, Irish.
- Yes. I was born there,

although I was brought up here...
Well, in Scotland.

I was reading some
press articles about you

and you explained you wouldn't
write an autobiography

because some skeletons
best remain skeletons.

Were you referring to your
father in that instance?

- No, I wouldn't...
- No comment.

Did this refer to sexual abuse?

No comment.

That's unnecessary,
even for a fishing expedition.

So you've been married
41 years, is that right?

- Yes.
- Impressive number.

- And it's been largely happy?
- Extremely.

Tell me about Marie.

Well, she's...

She's kind...

and she's generous

and she's funny...

and religious...

and I think she's
the best person I know.

This will break her,
you have no idea.

Have you managed
to stay faithful to Marie?

No comment.

Sexually, would you describe
yourself as a man of average

or... greater than average
sexual habits?

You expect him
to know what average is?

I have absolutely
no idea what average is.

I'd advise you to answer
your questions yourself, Mr Finchley.

I would describe myself as a man

with average sexual appetite.

Are there any sexual practises

you engage in which you think
most people would regard as unusual?

No comment.

OK, so we've had an allegation
from Rebecca Thornton.

Does that name mean anything to you?

No comment.

Rebecca Thornton alleges that,
on the 8th of December, 1993,

you raped her on the film set
of Japes in Bedford.

Can you remember any details
from that night?

No.

Does that face mean anything to you?

It means nothing, sorry.

She must have made a mistake.

Great.

That concludes the interview.

Let's get you bailed, shall we?

- I really don't know her, you know.
- Paul,

no need to say anything more.

Interview terminated at 11:43 am.

JEROME You arrested him at 7:48.
I make that three hours and 55 minutes.

I'd say leaving by
the back might be a good idea.

Everyone's a pap with their
smartphones nowadays.

They didn't tidy up
after themselves.

They tried to but they didn't do
a very good job.

I wasn't sure, you know,
cos you had your lunch...

They took my computer as
well as yours.

They took a lot of things, actually.

They showed me some it.

They shouldn't have, but they did.

Should we have a cup of tea.

It could be quite useful.
We could, as we tidy,

- turn it into a spring clean.
- Marie.

Porn on your phone.

Who watches porn on their phone?

Couldn't you get the laptop
open quick enough?

- Marie...
- They questions they asked me...

about you, about us, about...
what we do in the bedroom.

I mean, whatever it is they
think you've done.

Marie, you must listen to me.
I didn't do this.

Can you tell me? I mean, do
you know what else they might find?

There's nothing to find.

It's just a desperate woman
being... desperate.

No.

You're not going up there.

I need to lie down for a bit.

You can lie on the sofa.

The times you came
home smelling of

whichever woman

and I'd understand.

Well, this is not one of those
times...

It can't be.

- Do you understand?
- Please, Marie.

I would prefer it if you did not

lie on our bed...

not today.

You're OK?

Sorry, I'll put that in the stupid
questions drawer.

Let us not speak of it again.

He's in the den.

Wasn't sure whether
to come round or not.

They interviewed you, too, did they?

Nice-looking black girl, woman.

Yes. Yes, I got her, too.

So, were you there during
any of the alleged?

Apparently not,
but they weren't sure.

Didn't give full details.

I don't think you should give
me full details.

They showed me a photo.

I didn't sleep with her.

I didn't remember her.

Simon says he's sorted you a lawyer.

Which one?

The one where we try to become
members of The Women's Institute.

- Good?
- Dated, but it has some good moments.

Carl, I'm sorry.

This hasn't been good for you either.

It's going to hit residuals hard.

Residuals?

Do you really think I give
a shit about residuals right now?

I'm not sure I can do this.

Come here.

I don't think
I can do this.

Of course you can.

It will soon be over.

I'm not in the bedroom,
if that's what you're...

No...I just needed some
clean clothes.

I didn't want to disturb you.

If I'm guilty,
I would say I was innocent.

If I'm innocent,
I would say I'm innocent.

I don't know what to say.

There's nothing to say.

It's not going to cheap this,
you know that.

Well, we spend whatever it takes
to get you off,

- don't we?
- Do we?

I know I've not treated you
well at times...

but you must know I didn't do this.

I believe you.

Yes.

They fucked us.

Smartphone pap bollocks.

- They knew. They fucking knew!
- What?

Telling us to leave around the back.

Apparently, they had local press
there on an unrelated matter.

Cunts.

Look, I tried calling. You need to
leave your phone on from now on.

I was asleep.

Well, I wanted to get here before
the reporters did.

Now everyone will know.

Well, they were going
to find out sooner or later.

But don't worry, I'll fuck them
back.

Good to meet you, Marie.

Why? Why would they do this?

Fishing.

They're fishing...

to see if anyone else comes forward.

They're testing you, Paul.

I am... I am...

I am unprepared to respond
to these allegations.

But I will say that

I am fully cooperating with the police

and I am innocent.

Of course I am. Obviously...

I would like some privacy
at this difficult time.

I recognise that that's very
unlikely to happen,

but my family

are not,
and have chosen not,

to be part of the public world.

Thanks for coping with all that.

Already started to run the meter.

Hail Mary full of grace,

the Lord is with thee.

Blessed art thou amongst women

and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.

Holy Mary, mother of God,

pray for us sinners now
and at the hour of our death, amen.

You've done
something with your hair.

Not sure I have.

I'm not sure you have either.

Force of habit.

In my life surrounded by women,

it's always safer to say you've done
something with your hair

because, generally, they have.
Not that there is anything...

One, two, three, four,

five, six.

How are you?

Still getting the cheques?

It's a bank transfer, Dad, so
I'm pretty much guaranteed to get them.

This stuff in the papers...

What stuff's that?

- What, you've not seen it?
- Of course I've seen it.

I was just wondering whether
you'd mention it or not.

You don't think they've been here?

- You just say, "No comment."
- Yeah, yeah, I know.

Yeah, and I know.

It's going to be hard for you.

So I'm just here to say
I support you.

Oh, that's moving, Dad.

Thank you.

We have Billy and Francis over for
the bank holiday, did you know?

Yep.

I think they only come to us
'cos we give them

more chocolate than their dad.

You let Francis eat chocolate?

Well, shouldn't I?

Well, I always remember you giving
me a look when I ate it.

She's as skinny as
a rake that girl,

she could do with some
flesh on her bones.

Well,
that's an interesting thing to say.

Is it?

Ideas of a female shape that
neither me or my daughter,

according to you, conform to.

Isn't that interesting?

Ooh, look.

Do you remember this?

Christ, we're not doing
"Do you remember when", are we?

No, Sheffield, 1991.

That Bill Forsyth film.

You and your mum came up for
the whole winter.

You won a competition when
you were up there.

Some youth talent thingy
and you sang...

Oh, I can't remember now.

Really?
I can't remember any of it.

Well, what's it doing there then?

Mum put the photo up.

She said it was a happy time
and I believed her.

You were a lovely wee thing then,
you know?

Yeah, I remember you telling
me that.

You told me that quite a lot.

Yes.

Mum says you've been visited

by a priest.

He didn't just randomly turn up.

I invited him.

Right. Why?

I wanted to see if I could
suck his cock.

No, you didn't.

Why?

I had this theory that maybe he
might be able to save me from hell.

I've been having this dream.

- You're in it.
- Right.

You're not sure whether to be
pleased or scared, are you?

Well, it's important
for you to tell me.

It's important for me to listen.

You've been listening in therapy,
I'm impressed.

We're by a lake,
we're having a picnic.

What lake?

Does that matter?

Well, yes, I want identify if it's
a lake we've been to or been near.

You know, what with your memory.

Yeah, well,
I don't think it's historical.

It me, you, Dave and the kids.

I don't think we ever took a trip
to a lake with the full family.

- My mum made a picnic.
- Definitely not Dave.

- It's interesting that he's there.
- Not really.

It's quite a big picnic.

And I think she baked the bread.

She's like really gone all out,
you know?

Just, like, two sandwiches with
tomato bread and everybody was

making too much of
a fuss about them.

Interesting,
we've just got a new bread-maker.

She's been making some very
strange combinations.

One, two, three,

four, five, six.

Anyway, you and the kids went off
for an explore

and we all lay back, sunny day,

and Dave took his top off.

And I said he shouldn't
in front of mum

and he said,

"She doesn't mind, do you, Marie?"

And winked.

And she said nothing.

And so I took my top off.

Top and bra.

And he was pissed off
but he said nothing.

And then you came back with the kids

and I put my top back on.

But left off my bra.

And you had this stone that you'd
found in the stream

and you were fucking proud

- of this stone.
- What kind of stone?

It was quite special, actually.

It was almost perfectly black.

And everybody admired it.

And you said you thought it was
the hardest stone you'd ever felt.

But Dave wasn't having that.

He said, "All stones are hard,
Paul, they're stones."

And then you started talking about
how some stones

are in fact softer than others

and not just chalk.

You know, for a woman who claims
to recollect nothing,

these are an impressive set of
memories, do you know that?

And then the argument got more
and more heated and then,

finally,
to prove how hard the stone was,

you just smacked him around
the head with it.

And he fell to the floor...

...bleeding.

And you just stared at him.

And then you looked at me
and then down at my tits.

And I hadn't...

put my bra back on.

And I knew my nipples
were hard and you said...

"Well, I better hit him again.

"Otherwise he'll report it,
won't he?"

And you told Mum to take the kids
away but they wanted to stay.

And you must have clobbered
Dave six or seven times.

Then you stopped and said,

"Nobody must ever know
what happened here."

And we all made a vow of secrecy.

What do you think that all
means, then?

Have you spoken to your
doctors about it?

Nope.

Just the priest.

And what did the priest have
to say about it?

That's when he let me blow him.

- Oh, Danielle.
- What?

"Is she joking, is she not? Isn't it
dangerous when they never know

"whether she sucked
the dick of a priest?"

He said that he didn't think
that I should see you.

And he said not to let you in
the next time that you came.

I would never hurt you...

or Dave...

...or any of my family.

You know.

You know that.

You realise I'm about to be dragged
through hell, don't you?

Aren't we all?

Don't you have the slightest
bit of sympathy?

I thought you came around
here to support me,

not for my sympathy.
I mean, I'm quoting you there.

Well, whatever I came round here
for, clearly it was a mistake.

Yeah.

Yeah, it probably was.

Then I'll go.

I am worried about you.

I'm worried about everything.

Whatever anyone says...

You haven't told
me it's bullshit yet.

Of course it fucking is.

I don't know what you want
me to say.

But I want you to know there's a big
part of me that wants me to say it.

- OK.
- OK.

Hi, it's me.

Yeah.

Well, I'm speaking from a phone box,
believe it or not.

Mm-hm.

Can I trust you?

The full night.

Do you know, the thing I envy most
about the beautiful woman

is the curve of the spine.

And the tragedy of a beautiful
woman is that that curve fades.

It doesn't disappear,
but it does... fade.

Marie tried very hard.

She was a beautiful woman.

She was a very beautiful woman.

Of course, the tragedy of being
a man is that we're never beautiful.

But at least
there's no beauty to fade.

I mean, I know there's handsome men,
but beautiful, pff...

I'm not saying that I am...

I always thought
I was rather funny looking.

Distinguished.

You look distinguished.

You could make money, you know.
Now that I'm...

- You can make money out of me.
- I won't.

Why not?

- Because I don't want the attention.
- I like that.

You're not pretending it's out of
some affection for me.

I do like that.

I have some affection for you,
but it's not my reason.

D'you do it?

You do it?!

No.

Sorry, I didn't think...
I thought we'd cancelled.

-No.
- No?

No.

Shit. Sorry.

Oh. Hello, Karl.

So I get the accusations,
and he gets the airtime. Hm?

_

First things first,
I want you to know

there is no truth to any of this...

Our first concern, Paul,
is to check that you're OK.

Well, I'm fine,
but I'd like you to ignore -

I'm asking you to ignore -

all the shite they're writing
about me in the papers.

It's simply the local constabulary
flexing its arms.

Yeah, it's just background noise
as far as I'm concerned.

It's just... yeah,
I'm not an audience.

- So this is assurance that...
- Simon, Simon.

Listen, I know
in the audience's eyes

this might be slightly different,

but I reckon I could do
a Deayton or a Ross on this one.

You know?
Brazen it out, turn it into a joke.

I'm not sure
what the joke would be, but

we could hammer that out
with the writers.

After all... a country where you're
innocent until proven guilty.

Well, we very much agree
with that last statement.

- The trouble is - if I can cut in, Tom.
- Of course.

This isn't like Angus Deayton
or Jonathan Ross.

Deayton was cocaine and prostitutes,
and Ross was...

Bad judgment.

They were a bit...
They made a mistake.

A mistake they admitted to.

And in both cases, you're talking
about late-night comedy shows,

not Smuggle, a late-afternoon quiz,

which, whilst occasionally funny,
has a very different audience.

I can see why you hired him.
Very smart.

So the show is off-air?

Actually, we're thinking of
bringing in a temporary replacement.

Someone to guide Smuggle in
your temporary absence.

Right. Clever.
Who're you thinking of?

- We're sounding out a few people.
- You're not going to say?

Not until we hear from them.

Well... so long as the
show survives unscathed.

Yes.

A lot of good crew working
on Smuggle, you know.

They should be protected.

It's just someone to keep your seat
warm until you come back.

Right.

Hello, Marie.

Part of me thought
you'd killed yourself.

I mean, I must have called you
a hundred times...

The press were calling me every
two minutes - my battery went flat.

I went into a shop to charge it
but they recognised me.

You didn't...?

It didn't occur to you
to let me know where you were?

I thought they might be
bugging my line.

- I just wanted to escape.
- Where did you go?

I was getting very angry
and... and ugly.

- And I thought it best to be in my...
- Where did you go?

- I visited Dee.
- Yes.

I know you visited Dee.

And then?

And then I went to the channel
to discuss implications about...

You went to a meeting
at Channel fucking 4?

And in between
I spent the night with somebody.

Oh.

I'm sorry.

About which bit?

Your Jerome called.

He wants you at the office.
He wants us both there.

- Maybe time for a shower.
- It sounded urgent, so...

let's just get it done, shall we?

_

_

_

_

_

_

_

_

Paul, Marie, this is Gerry.
He's an ex-detective sergeant.

- He's going to be working with us.
- Is he?

Always useful to have
an ex-cop around.

Well, I'm a useful insider -
that's what I like to say.

- He's good.
- Great.

I've got to say,
really don't approve of

the stunt they pulled with
the photograph. Really unnecessary.

Though it has worked.

OK, so, we're going to need to
speak frankly.

Marie, maybe want to step outside
and we'll bring you in later?

- I'd rather not.
- Paul?

There's very little my husband's
done I've not been aware of.

- His affairs have not been subtle.
- Fine.

The search of the house,
we can deal with,

the computer is still in the labs,

but they previewed the porn
you had watched on your phone.

Quite violent.

Nothing too extraordinary -
I've seen worse.

But I wish you'd forewarned me,

and they found quite considerable
evidence of infidelity again -

nothing truly extraordinary.

Well, you put it around a bit.
You're famous.

Juries don't like it, mind you.

Particularly if you presented
yourself as a family man.

There are two things
which are trickier.

One, the photos have had an effect.

Seven women now
have come forward.

- Seven?!
- That's a pretty typical number.

Nothing to be too concerned about.

- They could be...
- I'm not a...

...fame-seekers,

they could be money-seekers,

they could have convinced themselves
it's true.

Or it could be true.

The one we're worried about
is this girl.

- Christina Farnborough.
- She was our babysitter.

- The claim is sexual assault, not rape.
- This is nonsense.

Multiple claims. Some in a car.

One attack, she says,
happened inside your home.

With your daughter upstairs.

- Christina was 15.
- They're saying you're a paedophile.

It's just a... girl.
This is horse shit.

We've been asked to bring you in
again, and we have agreed to do so.

So we have an hour, and in
that hour I want to know everything.

You understand?

Because we won't hear
what they've got for a long, long time.

Until then, we want advantage.

So, let's start at the beginning,
shall we?

They think I'm Jimmy fucking Savile.

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