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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,064 --> 00:00:03,064 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 2 00:00:15,444 --> 00:00:17,144 Freeze! 3 00:00:17,613 --> 00:00:18,747 I mean, stay. 4 00:00:18,748 --> 00:00:22,316 Boy, that GPS tracking tag we put his collar really works. 5 00:00:22,317 --> 00:00:25,720 - That's a good boy. - Thanks. 6 00:00:25,721 --> 00:00:27,155 I was talking to the dog. 7 00:00:27,156 --> 00:00:28,922 Come on, Hunter. Let's get you home. 8 00:00:28,924 --> 00:00:31,693 - Wanna go for a ride, buddy? - Sure. Where are we going? 9 00:00:31,694 --> 00:00:33,327 Nope, still the dog. 10 00:00:33,328 --> 00:00:37,097 ♪ You think there's not a lot goin' on ♪ 11 00:00:37,099 --> 00:00:40,433 ♪ Look closer, baby you're so wrong ♪ 12 00:00:40,435 --> 00:00:43,806 2x09 - Tag You're I.T. 13 00:00:52,847 --> 00:00:54,814 So scaring the kitty with vegetables 14 00:00:54,816 --> 00:00:56,249 is your idea of a good time? 15 00:00:56,250 --> 00:00:57,983 Why is the cat afraid of a cucumber? 16 00:00:57,985 --> 00:01:00,052 Kale is far more terrifying. 17 00:01:00,054 --> 00:01:02,789 - Where do you find this stuff, Mom? - Mew Tube. 18 00:01:02,790 --> 00:01:05,691 The only place to find all the cute cat videos. 19 00:01:05,693 --> 00:01:08,929 Yeah, 'cause cat videos are a real rarity on the Internet. 20 00:01:08,930 --> 00:01:10,396 It's just harmless good fun. 21 00:01:10,397 --> 00:01:12,865 If you want good fun, it needs to be harmful. 22 00:01:12,867 --> 00:01:15,251 The funniest videos online are dudes getting 23 00:01:15,252 --> 00:01:17,738 sacked in the 'nads. Timeless classic. 24 00:01:17,739 --> 00:01:19,773 There's an entire website dedicated to it 25 00:01:19,774 --> 00:01:21,041 called "Hard in the Nards." 26 00:01:21,042 --> 00:01:23,876 Mom, maybe don't Google "Hard" or "Nards." 27 00:01:23,878 --> 00:01:26,946 People getting hurt isn't funny. It's just plain stupid. 28 00:01:26,947 --> 00:01:28,647 Well, stupid's where it's at online. 29 00:01:28,649 --> 00:01:31,417 Here, let me show you one that's the best of both worlds. 30 00:01:31,418 --> 00:01:33,986 It's a video of a cat clamped onto a guy's crotch. 31 00:01:35,389 --> 00:01:37,957 Uh-oh. 32 00:01:39,460 --> 00:01:40,893 Aah! Where did you all... 33 00:01:40,894 --> 00:01:43,129 - This is an outrage! - I'm in a Facebook flame war. 34 00:01:43,130 --> 00:01:46,699 - Interrupting my sexy chats! - Whoa, whoa. 35 00:01:46,700 --> 00:01:48,933 Can someone rational please explain what's going on? 36 00:01:48,935 --> 00:01:53,058 - I don't know where you think you... - I said "someone rational." 37 00:01:53,707 --> 00:01:55,975 - You'll have to do. - This massive, 38 00:01:55,976 --> 00:01:57,742 but not out-of-character, overreaction 39 00:01:57,744 --> 00:02:00,780 - is because the WiFi is down. - You need to reboot your router. 40 00:02:00,781 --> 00:02:03,815 Ah. Okay, that sounds reasonable. 41 00:02:03,817 --> 00:02:05,583 WiFi should be back up in a jiffy. 42 00:02:05,585 --> 00:02:07,953 Aah! My god. 43 00:02:07,954 --> 00:02:10,388 What else happens in this town when my back is turned? 44 00:02:10,390 --> 00:02:12,825 Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to. 45 00:02:12,826 --> 00:02:15,960 Why is everyone so upset about my WiFi being down? 46 00:02:15,962 --> 00:02:17,529 They didn't even stick around to use it. 47 00:02:17,530 --> 00:02:20,399 Oh, uh, we don't have to be here to use your WiFi. 48 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:22,467 You don't? Where does it reach? 49 00:02:22,468 --> 00:02:25,503 Main Street, bar... my bathroom. 50 00:02:25,505 --> 00:02:29,506 - Kinda weak in my basement. - My WiFi can't travel that far. 51 00:02:29,508 --> 00:02:30,408 No, no. 52 00:02:30,409 --> 00:02:32,342 That's why we installed the signal booster. 53 00:02:32,344 --> 00:02:34,022 The what? 54 00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:36,676 You mean I'm paying for the entire town's WiFi? 55 00:02:36,711 --> 00:02:38,081 We paid for the signal booster! 56 00:02:38,083 --> 00:02:41,919 - And everyone knows about this? - Everyone but you, apparently. 57 00:02:41,921 --> 00:02:43,487 We thought you were okay with this. 58 00:02:43,488 --> 00:02:45,489 Yeah. Why are you shocked 59 00:02:45,490 --> 00:02:48,392 that people are using your open WiFi? Brace yourself: 60 00:02:48,393 --> 00:02:50,391 they use your ketchup and napkins too. 61 00:02:50,426 --> 00:02:54,664 Yeah, when they're here. These are free things for paying customers. 62 00:02:54,666 --> 00:02:58,202 We are customers. Just sometimes, we're customers at home. 63 00:02:58,204 --> 00:03:01,171 Yeah, we're not all married to our careers. 64 00:03:03,007 --> 00:03:06,275 If I turn around again, will you all disappear? 65 00:03:09,143 --> 00:03:12,987 I promise this won't happen again. 66 00:03:14,004 --> 00:03:17,517 You're right. That GPS tag made it a real time-saver. 67 00:03:17,519 --> 00:03:20,287 Just think, if we tagged everyone in town, 68 00:03:20,288 --> 00:03:22,589 we'd always know where everyone was. 69 00:03:22,591 --> 00:03:24,257 That would make our job way easier. 70 00:03:24,258 --> 00:03:28,595 Except that would be a highly illegal and massive invasion of privacy. 71 00:03:28,597 --> 00:03:31,098 Oh. Right, but consider this: 72 00:03:31,099 --> 00:03:34,333 I assumed you'd be on board, and I've done it already. 73 00:03:34,335 --> 00:03:36,835 Ah! Aah! Oh! Aah! 74 00:03:39,773 --> 00:03:43,042 - It's not even a cute cat. - Or a cute crotch, 75 00:03:43,043 --> 00:03:44,877 but look at how many views it's gotten. 76 00:03:44,879 --> 00:03:47,680 - I just don't see what the point is. - The point is, 77 00:03:47,681 --> 00:03:49,081 sometimes you can make a lot of money 78 00:03:49,082 --> 00:03:51,383 and get famous from a single dumb video. 79 00:03:51,385 --> 00:03:52,519 You can? 80 00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:56,121 - Ready to go? - Let's get our stupid on. 81 00:03:56,123 --> 00:03:57,990 Hmm.... 82 00:03:59,593 --> 00:04:02,494 Time to make a wish. 83 00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:09,131 Hmm... 84 00:04:13,036 --> 00:04:15,971 Watching you with technology is more entertaining 85 00:04:15,972 --> 00:04:17,772 than these videos I'm enjoying... 86 00:04:17,774 --> 00:04:22,210 - for free... on your open WiFi. - Enjoy it while you can, 87 00:04:22,212 --> 00:04:24,945 'cause I'm putting a password on this thing. 88 00:04:24,947 --> 00:04:26,482 As soon as I find its keyboard. 89 00:04:26,483 --> 00:04:29,117 Great, looks like I'll just have enough time to watch 90 00:04:29,118 --> 00:04:30,885 the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy. 91 00:04:32,189 --> 00:04:34,622 The director's cut. 92 00:04:34,624 --> 00:04:38,092 How on earth did you manage to tag so many people? 93 00:04:38,094 --> 00:04:42,664 I gave them friendship bracelets. The GPS tags are in the charm. 94 00:04:42,666 --> 00:04:45,666 If they're friendship bracelets, why didn't you give me one? 95 00:04:45,668 --> 00:04:48,169 You're a work friend. Don't make this weird. 96 00:04:48,170 --> 00:04:50,470 You can't track people without them knowing. 97 00:04:50,472 --> 00:04:54,107 This is really, really, really illegal. 98 00:04:54,109 --> 00:04:57,611 If it helps the police, how illegal can it be? 99 00:04:57,613 --> 00:05:00,981 - I said three "reallies." - When we're in the car, 100 00:05:00,982 --> 00:05:02,849 we have the right to surveil people. 101 00:05:02,851 --> 00:05:05,453 What's the difference doing it from the comfort of our desks 102 00:05:05,454 --> 00:05:08,555 using technology in way that it wasn't intended? 103 00:05:08,557 --> 00:05:10,592 Because it's... Hang on. 104 00:05:10,593 --> 00:05:11,926 That's Rheena, Michelle, and Mavis. 105 00:05:11,927 --> 00:05:15,028 At Rheena's. What are they up to? 106 00:05:15,030 --> 00:05:18,064 - Maybe they're a girl gang. - That's everyone from book club. 107 00:05:18,066 --> 00:05:19,999 They said it was cancelled this week. 108 00:05:20,001 --> 00:05:23,903 Probably discussing "Let's Get Together and Back-Stab Our Friend." 109 00:05:23,905 --> 00:05:26,107 Yech, that's a terrible title. 110 00:05:28,810 --> 00:05:32,278 Just think, we could become huge Internet celebrities. 111 00:05:32,280 --> 00:05:34,748 I could be bigger than that epic mealtime guy! 112 00:05:35,784 --> 00:05:38,551 I'm comin' after your viewers, Harley! 113 00:05:39,087 --> 00:05:42,889 Who the hell is Hank Yarbo, and how is he stealing all my viewers? 114 00:05:43,859 --> 00:05:45,126 Whoa... 115 00:05:45,127 --> 00:05:47,627 He took that puck in the nuts like a champ. 116 00:05:47,629 --> 00:05:49,929 I'm inspired. 117 00:05:49,931 --> 00:05:52,532 Hey, guys! We're making a giant burrito. 118 00:05:52,533 --> 00:05:55,601 It'll be a hockey bag full of pucks and nuts, 119 00:05:55,603 --> 00:05:57,036 covered in gravy. 120 00:05:57,037 --> 00:06:01,106 I'm calling it... the Yarbo. 121 00:06:02,610 --> 00:06:04,778 Hey! I was still musing! 122 00:06:04,779 --> 00:06:07,046 It's my turn. I'm going to be bigger 123 00:06:07,047 --> 00:06:09,047 than vlogging sensation Casey Neistat. 124 00:06:11,118 --> 00:06:12,951 Ah, I can't concentrate, I'm too excited. 125 00:06:12,953 --> 00:06:15,121 Okay, let's do this. Spread your legs, 126 00:06:15,122 --> 00:06:16,456 and pretend I'm not aiming for your crotch. 127 00:06:16,457 --> 00:06:19,825 Hang on. Why are we wingin' the puck at my junk? 128 00:06:19,827 --> 00:06:22,795 How am I going to wing a puck at my own junk? 129 00:06:22,797 --> 00:06:27,699 - Yeah, I guess you got a point. - It's just physics, buddy. 130 00:06:29,336 --> 00:06:32,904 Does anyone in here know how to put a stupid password 131 00:06:32,906 --> 00:06:35,271 into a stupid router? 132 00:06:35,776 --> 00:06:39,512 - With no strings attached? - And that would benefit us how? 133 00:06:39,513 --> 00:06:42,747 Fine. What are your strings? 134 00:06:42,749 --> 00:06:44,783 One string, very reasonable. 135 00:06:47,287 --> 00:06:50,790 - Hey! The WiFi is locked. - Is it? 136 00:06:50,791 --> 00:06:52,825 Huh. I'm online. 137 00:06:52,826 --> 00:06:57,295 Oh, that's right. I'm the only one who has the password. 138 00:06:57,297 --> 00:07:02,822 I and I alone have access to the World Wide Web. 139 00:07:06,739 --> 00:07:09,273 - I have it too. - Well, of course you... 140 00:07:09,274 --> 00:07:11,675 Geez, I was having a friggin' moment over here. 141 00:07:14,152 --> 00:07:15,386 Unbelievable. 142 00:07:15,387 --> 00:07:18,155 Michelle said she was going to the city to buy a romper, 143 00:07:18,156 --> 00:07:20,591 but according to this, she stayed home. 144 00:07:20,593 --> 00:07:24,160 Huh, probably just sewed a shirt to her shorts. 145 00:07:24,162 --> 00:07:26,698 Here you go, guys. Hey! 146 00:07:26,699 --> 00:07:29,367 Are you on my WiFi? How did you crack the password? 147 00:07:29,368 --> 00:07:31,667 Ease up on the paranoia there, Mr. Robot. 148 00:07:31,669 --> 00:07:35,270 We don't need WiFi. This tracking system works on GPS. 149 00:07:35,272 --> 00:07:36,540 What are you tracking? 150 00:07:36,541 --> 00:07:38,141 - People. - Davis! 151 00:07:38,142 --> 00:07:40,944 Whoops! Don't tell anyone. Legal reasons. 152 00:07:40,945 --> 00:07:42,879 Wait, are you tracking me? 153 00:07:42,881 --> 00:07:45,581 No, I wouldn't do that to a friend. 154 00:07:45,583 --> 00:07:51,053 - Here, have a friendship bracelet. - Aww, that's sweet. 155 00:07:51,055 --> 00:07:53,490 Hey, since we're friends, what's the WiFi password? 156 00:07:53,491 --> 00:07:55,191 Nice try. 157 00:07:55,894 --> 00:07:58,861 "N-I-C-E... Hmm... 158 00:07:59,797 --> 00:08:01,665 That's odd. According to Zeke's tracker, 159 00:08:01,666 --> 00:08:03,599 he's been in that dumpster for hours. 160 00:08:03,601 --> 00:08:06,336 Hmm. He's usually only in there 20 minutes, tops. 161 00:08:06,337 --> 00:08:09,272 You better investigate that. I'll stay here 162 00:08:09,273 --> 00:08:11,773 and keep track of Michelle's web of lies. 163 00:08:11,775 --> 00:08:12,742 I'm on it. 164 00:08:12,743 --> 00:08:15,245 And let Lacey know her password doesn't work. 165 00:08:16,914 --> 00:08:20,215 Hey, Lacey, I'm putting together a film crew 166 00:08:20,217 --> 00:08:22,284 to shoot a viral video of Oscar. 167 00:08:22,286 --> 00:08:25,888 Do you know anyone with a movie camera, and some lights? 168 00:08:25,889 --> 00:08:27,157 Probably going to need one of those best boys 169 00:08:27,158 --> 00:08:28,458 I keep hearing about. 170 00:08:28,459 --> 00:08:30,126 Oh, sure, I can get you all that. 171 00:08:30,127 --> 00:08:32,462 Plus a crane jib, and James Cameron to direct. 172 00:08:32,463 --> 00:08:35,631 - No, no, I'll be directing. - You don't need all that. 173 00:08:35,632 --> 00:08:37,699 You can just shoot a video with your phone. 174 00:08:37,701 --> 00:08:41,002 I can? Movie camera and egg timer? 175 00:08:41,004 --> 00:08:42,771 This is one hell of a rig. 176 00:08:43,646 --> 00:08:47,316 Your fluffy cousin tried to kill me! This is payback! 177 00:08:47,317 --> 00:08:49,350 H'yah! Tell your friends! 178 00:08:49,352 --> 00:08:51,552 Oscar, can you come here? 179 00:08:53,156 --> 00:08:57,291 The old "step-on-a-rake, smack-in-the-puss" routine. 180 00:08:57,293 --> 00:08:59,961 Come on, stupid. Find your mark. 181 00:09:00,964 --> 00:09:03,365 Oh... Well, this could hurt someone. 182 00:09:03,366 --> 00:09:04,533 Dammit. 183 00:09:04,534 --> 00:09:07,336 You left the rake on the... Whoa! 184 00:09:07,337 --> 00:09:09,037 Dammit! 185 00:09:09,106 --> 00:09:11,740 Dammit! 186 00:09:18,284 --> 00:09:19,351 Huh? Oh... Oh! 187 00:09:19,352 --> 00:09:21,653 Hmm... Something's off. 188 00:09:21,654 --> 00:09:23,521 - Are you wearing a cup? - No. 189 00:09:23,522 --> 00:09:25,357 Who's there? 190 00:09:25,358 --> 00:09:27,792 Okay, I'm wearing a cup. I might have kids someday. 191 00:09:27,793 --> 00:09:29,593 I don't want them coming out dented. 192 00:09:29,595 --> 00:09:31,295 You want to go viral or not? 193 00:09:33,699 --> 00:09:36,667 Okay, let me explain the concept of a nut shot. 194 00:09:36,669 --> 00:09:39,636 I provide the shot, and you provide the rest. 195 00:09:39,638 --> 00:09:42,373 Wouldn't a shot to the noggin be just as entertaining? 196 00:09:42,374 --> 00:09:44,475 - Ah! - Nope. 197 00:09:46,278 --> 00:09:48,545 Oh man! I can't believe how long 198 00:09:48,546 --> 00:09:51,347 that cat stays clamped on this guy's crotch. 199 00:09:51,349 --> 00:09:53,249 Hang in there, kitty! 200 00:09:53,251 --> 00:09:55,819 You got WiFi? Wanna set up a hotspot for me? 201 00:09:55,820 --> 00:09:57,820 Not as much as I wanna tell you to get stuffed. 202 00:09:57,822 --> 00:09:59,722 The information highway's a lot faster 203 00:09:59,724 --> 00:10:02,058 without all you Winnebagos clogging it up. 204 00:10:02,059 --> 00:10:02,926 Beat it. 205 00:10:04,296 --> 00:10:06,262 Ah, should have gotten her to pay for those chips. 206 00:10:06,264 --> 00:10:08,365 Ah, well. Whoa-ho! 207 00:10:08,366 --> 00:10:10,667 That cat's still latched on there. 208 00:10:10,669 --> 00:10:12,269 Whew! How much longer does this... 209 00:10:12,270 --> 00:10:13,537 Eight more minutes? 210 00:10:13,858 --> 00:10:15,758 Anything to eat today? 211 00:10:15,759 --> 00:10:17,327 What's the point of going out for lunch 212 00:10:17,328 --> 00:10:20,029 if you can't post pictures of your food online? 213 00:10:20,031 --> 00:10:23,934 - You could talk to your wife. - We have been talking. 214 00:10:23,935 --> 00:10:25,667 About how there's no free WiFi. 215 00:10:25,669 --> 00:10:29,204 Hmm, well, maybe if you both ordered burgers and fries, 216 00:10:29,206 --> 00:10:32,141 and dessert, and tipped 20%, 217 00:10:32,143 --> 00:10:36,291 - I could do a little something for you. - Intriguing. 218 00:10:36,326 --> 00:10:38,180 Could you also give me the password? 219 00:10:38,182 --> 00:10:39,649 That's what I meant. 220 00:10:39,650 --> 00:10:41,584 What did you think the "little something" was? 221 00:10:41,585 --> 00:10:44,319 Yeah, Won. What did you think? 222 00:10:44,855 --> 00:10:47,589 Don't share this with anyone, 223 00:10:47,591 --> 00:10:49,857 or I'll have to change the password. 224 00:10:49,859 --> 00:10:51,960 Like you know how to change the password. 225 00:10:51,962 --> 00:10:55,023 - Okay, we promise. - Hmm. 226 00:10:57,167 --> 00:11:00,268 Turns out Zeke's not dead in a dumpster, 227 00:11:00,270 --> 00:11:03,271 - but my heart is. - You should notify his next of kin. 228 00:11:03,273 --> 00:11:05,841 I said he's not... Are you listening to me? 229 00:11:05,842 --> 00:11:08,776 Zeke threw my friendship bracelet in the garbage. 230 00:11:08,778 --> 00:11:10,145 Maybe he's not into jewelry 231 00:11:10,146 --> 00:11:12,113 that looks like it was made by a seven-year old girl. 232 00:11:12,115 --> 00:11:14,648 I don't know about this tracking thing. 233 00:11:14,650 --> 00:11:18,586 Are you kidding me? You're a genius for coming up with this. 234 00:11:18,588 --> 00:11:20,689 See? Looks great on me. 235 00:11:20,690 --> 00:11:22,390 Brings out the colour of my wrist. 236 00:11:22,392 --> 00:11:24,626 I don't know. It doesn't feel like it's paying off. 237 00:11:26,228 --> 00:11:28,863 Uh-oh. Rheena's about to park illegally. 238 00:11:28,865 --> 00:11:31,199 You could write the ticket on the way to give it to her. 239 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:34,502 That would give me time to make a new bracelet for Zeke, 240 00:11:34,504 --> 00:11:37,037 with more masculine colours. 241 00:11:37,607 --> 00:11:39,307 Go get 'em, tiger! 242 00:11:42,411 --> 00:11:45,579 That's it. Say good night, Gilligan. 243 00:11:45,581 --> 00:11:46,815 This'll be gold. 244 00:11:48,484 --> 00:11:52,941 Oh, whoa... Yeah. 245 00:11:52,976 --> 00:11:55,239 Seriously? When has any human ever 246 00:11:55,240 --> 00:11:56,984 gotten in a hammock without... 247 00:11:58,093 --> 00:11:59,227 Grr... 248 00:11:59,228 --> 00:12:01,294 Ow! 249 00:12:03,965 --> 00:12:06,199 Psst! Here's the password. 250 00:12:06,201 --> 00:12:08,870 No sharesies. 251 00:12:11,540 --> 00:12:13,240 Ugh, dammit, woman! 252 00:12:13,242 --> 00:12:16,943 Why bring me lemonade if I can't reach it?! 253 00:12:16,945 --> 00:12:19,979 Wait until he finds out it's not lemonade. 254 00:12:19,981 --> 00:12:21,881 Stalking anyone in particular, Mom? 255 00:12:21,883 --> 00:12:25,452 You scared the bejesus out of me. Quit being so sneaky. 256 00:12:25,454 --> 00:12:27,320 Says the woman crouched in a shrub. 257 00:12:29,591 --> 00:12:32,126 Do you know how long I've been in here trying 258 00:12:32,127 --> 00:12:34,661 to get a video of Oscar falling out of that hammock? 259 00:12:34,663 --> 00:12:36,063 Oh, sorry I interrupted. 260 00:12:36,064 --> 00:12:39,749 That would have been... hilarious. 261 00:12:40,735 --> 00:12:42,302 Mom's got a ringer. 262 00:12:42,303 --> 00:12:43,871 Dad. It's only a matter of time 263 00:12:43,872 --> 00:12:47,506 before she gets a video of him doing something stupid. 264 00:12:47,508 --> 00:12:49,475 If her video goes viral before ours, 265 00:12:49,477 --> 00:12:51,477 I'll never hear the end of it. 266 00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:53,780 We've got to ratchet this up. 267 00:12:53,782 --> 00:12:57,650 - Did you run all the way here? - No, I drove, 268 00:12:57,652 --> 00:13:00,353 but you've got a long driveway. Whew. 269 00:13:02,691 --> 00:13:05,324 I see you leaving that bakery, Michelle. 270 00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:07,627 Gluten-free, my ass. 271 00:13:07,628 --> 00:13:10,796 Well, that was a waste of time. 272 00:13:10,798 --> 00:13:12,299 Didn't you give Rheena a ticket? 273 00:13:12,300 --> 00:13:15,051 I tried, but she hadn't parked yet, and said I couldn't 274 00:13:15,052 --> 00:13:17,803 give her a ticket for thinking about doing a crime. 275 00:13:17,805 --> 00:13:19,038 Then we spent half an hour 276 00:13:19,039 --> 00:13:21,807 arguing the plausibility of Minority Report. 277 00:13:21,809 --> 00:13:23,509 It didn't save me any time, 278 00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:27,446 and Rheena's extra mad at me. This GPS thing sucks. 279 00:13:27,448 --> 00:13:29,749 - I'm shutting it down. - No! 280 00:13:29,750 --> 00:13:31,783 I finally know what everyone is up to. 281 00:13:31,785 --> 00:13:34,337 Not everyone, because not everyone 282 00:13:34,338 --> 00:13:36,227 - in town has a bracelet. - What? 283 00:13:36,262 --> 00:13:38,540 Who doesn't have a bracelet, and what are they doing? 284 00:13:38,541 --> 00:13:40,163 You need to buy more tracking tags. 285 00:13:40,198 --> 00:13:42,728 Forget it. The power's gone to your head. 286 00:13:42,730 --> 00:13:46,866 - Also, it's too much work. - Oh, you're right. 287 00:13:46,867 --> 00:13:49,869 Ugh, can't believe how sucked into this technology I got. 288 00:13:49,870 --> 00:13:52,571 - Give me the car keys. - Why? 289 00:13:52,572 --> 00:13:54,140 I need to get away from the screen. 290 00:13:54,141 --> 00:13:56,998 Clear my head, maybe take a nap. 291 00:13:58,679 --> 00:14:02,180 What the... What's with the endless buffering? 292 00:14:03,183 --> 00:14:05,484 Are you online? How'd you get the password? 293 00:14:05,485 --> 00:14:08,755 - What are you, CSIS? - What's CSIS? 294 00:14:08,756 --> 00:14:11,523 That's just what someone in CSIS would say. 295 00:14:11,525 --> 00:14:13,526 All you have to do is order a lot of food, 296 00:14:13,527 --> 00:14:14,861 and Lacey will give you the password. 297 00:14:14,862 --> 00:14:18,295 - But don't tell anyone. - Tell no one. 298 00:14:18,297 --> 00:14:21,632 What's a gal gotta do to monopolize the Internet around here? 299 00:14:21,634 --> 00:14:24,101 Merge with Time Warner? 300 00:14:28,541 --> 00:14:30,607 Huh? Hunter? 301 00:14:30,609 --> 00:14:33,793 I am not chasing that dog again. 302 00:14:33,828 --> 00:14:36,180 Don't... 303 00:14:36,182 --> 00:14:38,583 Don't you... Don't even... 304 00:14:40,352 --> 00:14:43,755 Oh, great. Now I have to give Helen a ticket 305 00:14:43,756 --> 00:14:46,356 for not picking up after her stupid dog. 306 00:14:46,358 --> 00:14:49,294 This program's killing me. 307 00:14:49,295 --> 00:14:51,161 Why is Zeke the highway? 308 00:14:51,163 --> 00:14:54,731 Wait. Karen has Zeke's bracelet. 309 00:14:54,733 --> 00:14:58,736 Where is she going? 310 00:14:58,897 --> 00:15:04,001 So... Frodo is about to throw the ring into the river of fire, 311 00:15:04,002 --> 00:15:06,102 when he changes his mind and keeps it, 312 00:15:06,104 --> 00:15:09,339 and that sense of betrayal Samwise felt 313 00:15:09,341 --> 00:15:12,308 is not unlike what's burning in my chest right now! 314 00:15:12,310 --> 00:15:14,878 Aw, are you talking about the Godfather? 315 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:16,414 No, that's Fredo! 316 00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,648 But there's also betrayal in the Godfather, 317 00:15:18,650 --> 00:15:20,951 so let's go with that. Bottom line, 318 00:15:20,952 --> 00:15:23,721 you gave up the password. You Fredoed me. 319 00:15:23,722 --> 00:15:25,189 Aw, I'm sorry. 320 00:15:25,190 --> 00:15:27,189 It only seemed fair to make people order food 321 00:15:27,191 --> 00:15:30,058 since I'm the only one paying for WiFi! 322 00:15:30,060 --> 00:15:32,127 Well, I'm going to change the password, 323 00:15:32,129 --> 00:15:34,497 and I'm not telling anyone what it is, 324 00:15:34,499 --> 00:15:37,934 including you, Frodo. Uh, Fredo. 325 00:15:37,935 --> 00:15:39,035 Where did we leave off with this? 326 00:15:39,036 --> 00:15:40,870 You can't just shut me out of my own WiFi. 327 00:15:41,773 --> 00:15:45,608 Oops, just did, and you're never going to guess the password. 328 00:15:45,610 --> 00:15:49,678 - Is it "Lacey betrayed me?" - Not anymore. 329 00:15:51,849 --> 00:15:55,551 So, you want me to jump off the ladder onto a ball, 330 00:15:55,553 --> 00:15:56,920 bounce onto the skateboard, 331 00:15:56,921 --> 00:15:58,388 roll through a hoop of fire, 332 00:15:58,389 --> 00:16:01,123 and smash crotch-first into a teeter-totter? 333 00:16:01,125 --> 00:16:03,158 Yeah, but make it look natural. 334 00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:05,627 I don't think hula hoops burst into flames naturally. 335 00:16:05,629 --> 00:16:06,829 You're overthinking. 336 00:16:06,830 --> 00:16:10,732 You're too aware of what's... Hold on, that's the problem! 337 00:16:10,734 --> 00:16:12,677 It's also the solution. 338 00:16:17,774 --> 00:16:19,943 - Hey, Dad! - What? 339 00:16:19,944 --> 00:16:21,744 How's it going with that prank video Mom's 340 00:16:21,745 --> 00:16:23,545 shooting of you that you're now totally aware of? 341 00:16:23,547 --> 00:16:24,914 You son of a bitch. 342 00:16:24,915 --> 00:16:28,819 Hey, don't talk about my mom like that. 343 00:16:32,555 --> 00:16:34,388 You're trying to make me look stupid?! 344 00:16:34,390 --> 00:16:35,823 You always look stupid. 345 00:16:35,824 --> 00:16:38,058 I just want to share you with the world. 346 00:16:38,060 --> 00:16:40,595 How many views does an old man yelling usually get? 347 00:16:40,596 --> 00:16:42,530 Depends if that hand-in-the-water trick works, 348 00:16:42,532 --> 00:16:45,266 - and he wets himself. - Who wet himself? 349 00:16:45,268 --> 00:16:47,401 And why am I getting a manicure? 350 00:16:47,403 --> 00:16:50,805 We had an agreement. We order too much food, 351 00:16:50,806 --> 00:16:55,242 - and you give us free WiFi. - Well, you had free WiFi, 352 00:16:55,244 --> 00:16:56,711 and you got a delicious meal, 353 00:16:56,712 --> 00:17:00,014 - so everyone should be happy! - We're not. 354 00:17:00,015 --> 00:17:02,850 - You owe us WiFi. - Lacey stole our WiFi! 355 00:17:02,851 --> 00:17:04,618 - Give us our WiFi back. - Yeah! 356 00:17:04,620 --> 00:17:06,720 You've been stealing my Internet for years. 357 00:17:06,722 --> 00:17:09,355 This is all because of that stupid signal booster. 358 00:17:09,357 --> 00:17:11,090 Oh, I should go smash it. 359 00:17:11,092 --> 00:17:13,893 Yeah, but you don't know where it is. 360 00:17:19,434 --> 00:17:21,835 Oh, don't I? I'm going there right now 361 00:17:21,836 --> 00:17:25,972 to smash it into a million pieces. If you want to stop me, 362 00:17:25,973 --> 00:17:29,041 you're going to have to get there first. 363 00:17:30,278 --> 00:17:32,646 - She's bluffing. - Or is she? 364 00:17:32,647 --> 00:17:35,047 Are you calling my bluff on the bluffing? 365 00:17:35,684 --> 00:17:36,917 Film all you want. 366 00:17:36,918 --> 00:17:39,719 I'm not gonna be the star of your dumb thing. 367 00:17:39,721 --> 00:17:41,554 The competition is out. 368 00:17:41,556 --> 00:17:43,522 Hank, go run 'nad-first into that tree! 369 00:17:43,524 --> 00:17:46,593 What? W-We talked about this. I'm too aware. 370 00:17:46,594 --> 00:17:47,694 Then close your eyes and run into the tree. 371 00:17:47,695 --> 00:17:50,109 Forget it! I'm out too. 372 00:17:52,833 --> 00:17:55,534 So... you went and bought more tags 373 00:17:55,536 --> 00:17:59,405 - to track the rest of the town, huh? - What? No! 374 00:17:59,406 --> 00:18:03,442 Aw, man! Have you been tracking me this entire time? 375 00:18:03,444 --> 00:18:07,479 That is not a friendly way to dispose of a friendship bracelet. 376 00:18:07,481 --> 00:18:09,982 - Did you see everywhere I went? - If you're asking 377 00:18:09,983 --> 00:18:13,419 if I know that you went to a laser hair removal place, then no. 378 00:18:13,420 --> 00:18:17,122 Okay, wow. This really is an invasion of privacy. 379 00:18:17,124 --> 00:18:21,325 - Experiment over. - Oh, thank god. 380 00:18:21,327 --> 00:18:23,528 - Friends again? - Work friends. 381 00:18:23,529 --> 00:18:24,463 Good enough. 382 00:18:24,464 --> 00:18:27,431 Then, as your friend, I have to say, 383 00:18:27,433 --> 00:18:30,002 laser hair removal? Why? 384 00:18:30,003 --> 00:18:31,770 You can barely see your mustache. 385 00:18:31,772 --> 00:18:35,506 This is the longest you've gone without being an idiot, Oscar. 386 00:18:35,508 --> 00:18:38,010 - Knock it off! - Come on, Hank. 387 00:18:38,011 --> 00:18:39,678 Just follow your natural doofus instinct. 388 00:18:39,679 --> 00:18:41,113 I don't have to take this. 389 00:18:41,114 --> 00:18:43,614 The verbal abuse, the physical abuse. 390 00:18:43,616 --> 00:18:45,245 If you want to film something, 391 00:18:45,367 --> 00:18:48,353 film me walking away. Whoa! 392 00:18:50,423 --> 00:18:52,024 Aah! Cucumber! 393 00:18:52,025 --> 00:18:54,592 Aah! Kale! 394 00:18:54,593 --> 00:18:56,928 - Did you get it? - I got it! Did you get it? 395 00:18:56,929 --> 00:18:58,629 - I did! - We both got it! 396 00:18:58,630 --> 00:18:59,730 The production value on this 397 00:18:59,731 --> 00:19:02,166 will get us to the top of "Hard in the Nards." 398 00:19:02,168 --> 00:19:05,479 Again, I can't stress enough. Do not Google any of that. 399 00:19:06,005 --> 00:19:08,505 I need to see that tracking thingie. 400 00:19:08,507 --> 00:19:10,074 Oh, we're not doing that anymore. 401 00:19:10,075 --> 00:19:12,676 I need to know where everyone in town is going. 402 00:19:12,678 --> 00:19:15,412 Trust me, you don't want to know. 403 00:19:15,414 --> 00:19:19,435 - Show me! - Jeez, okay. 404 00:19:19,484 --> 00:19:23,520 - Explain how this works. - This is you at the police station. 405 00:19:23,522 --> 00:19:26,323 The other blue dots are whoever's wearing a tag. 406 00:19:26,325 --> 00:19:28,524 Looks like a mob of them are coming down Main Street. 407 00:19:30,594 --> 00:19:32,447 They're coming towards the police station. 408 00:19:33,397 --> 00:19:37,967 But... they're supposed to go towards the booster. 409 00:19:37,969 --> 00:19:39,036 Unless... 410 00:19:39,037 --> 00:19:40,704 Eight metres. 411 00:19:40,705 --> 00:19:42,805 Six metres. 412 00:19:42,807 --> 00:19:44,507 Two metres! 413 00:19:44,508 --> 00:19:47,376 That can't be. That's inside the room. 414 00:19:47,378 --> 00:19:49,078 It's reading right, man! 415 00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:55,218 They're on the roof. Wait, where'd Lacey go? 416 00:19:55,220 --> 00:19:57,287 Ha ha! Suckers! 417 00:19:57,288 --> 00:19:58,956 I knew you'd want to protect the booster. 418 00:19:58,957 --> 00:20:01,422 The tracking devices Karen and Davis put on you 419 00:20:01,424 --> 00:20:04,960 - led me right to it. - Tracking devices? 420 00:20:04,961 --> 00:20:06,661 We're being monitored? 421 00:20:07,264 --> 00:20:09,999 Uh... don't you have a booster box to protect? 422 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,033 Too late! Ha ha! 423 00:20:14,905 --> 00:20:18,165 There. WiFi problem solved. 424 00:20:19,209 --> 00:20:24,412 Oh, is it? I'm still the only one with the password. 425 00:20:24,414 --> 00:20:27,015 Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 426 00:20:27,017 --> 00:20:32,053 - And I'm the only one with a cleaver. - We should talk. 427 00:20:35,552 --> 00:20:37,286 How's our video doing? 428 00:20:37,287 --> 00:20:39,554 - We rich and famous yet? - Far from it. 429 00:20:39,555 --> 00:20:42,824 - Check the comments. - "Two-camera shoot." 430 00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:45,393 "This is fake." "Totally staged." 431 00:20:45,394 --> 00:20:49,029 How dumb are these people that they can't enjoy real stupid? 432 00:20:49,031 --> 00:20:51,966 Oh, don't lose faith in the stupidity of the Internet. 433 00:20:53,069 --> 00:20:55,603 There's half a million hits on "Hottie Meat Cleaver Mama 434 00:20:55,604 --> 00:20:57,638 Loses It On Police Station Roof." 435 00:20:57,640 --> 00:21:00,475 Will you stop showing that to people? 436 00:21:00,476 --> 00:21:02,399 Hey, they called you "Hottie." 437 00:21:08,948 --> 00:21:10,415 ♪ I don't know ♪ 438 00:21:10,416 --> 00:21:13,317 ♪ The same things you don't know ♪ 439 00:21:16,755 --> 00:21:18,755 ♪ I don't know ♪ 440 00:21:18,757 --> 00:21:21,758 ♪ I just... don't know ♪ 441 00:21:23,829 --> 00:21:27,764 - ♪ Ooh ♪ - ♪ It's a great big place ♪ 442 00:21:27,766 --> 00:21:31,267 - ♪ Ooh ♪ - ♪ Full of nothin' but space ♪ 443 00:21:31,269 --> 00:21:35,204 - ♪ Ooh ♪ - ♪ And it's my happy place ♪ 444 00:21:35,206 --> 00:21:37,741 ♪ I don't know ♪ 445 00:21:38,588 --> 00:21:41,499 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 34709

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