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1
00:02:08,208 --> 00:02:10,542
Can I have a black coffee
with sugar, please?
2
00:02:10,542 --> 00:02:12,708
See that glass up front?
3
00:02:12,708 --> 00:02:14,208
Yeah, a window
popped out of the
12th floor this morning.
4
00:02:14,208 --> 00:02:17,708
Can you believe that?
Any one of us could've
been under it when it fell.
5
00:02:17,708 --> 00:02:19,083
Probably not the idiot
that installed it.
6
00:02:19,083 --> 00:02:20,708
He's probably home
in bed right now sleeping.
7
00:02:50,458 --> 00:02:52,458
One second you're walking
down State Street minding
your own business,
8
00:02:52,458 --> 00:02:54,750
the next second, bam!
Shredded beef.
9
00:02:54,750 --> 00:02:56,875
Makes you think, doesn't it?
10
00:02:56,875 --> 00:03:00,291
I mean, we all have things
we want to do in this life.
I do, you do.
11
00:03:00,291 --> 00:03:02,750
Before we get
a chance to do 'em,
some window falls on us.
12
00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:05,041
Some truck flattens you
or you catch some disease.
13
00:03:05,041 --> 00:03:07,542
Oh!
14
00:03:07,542 --> 00:03:08,583
Not contagious.
15
00:03:12,750 --> 00:03:14,750
Now, Marty here...
Oh, Carl, you know
Martin Harvey?
16
00:03:14,750 --> 00:03:17,083
Sixteenth floor, new products?
Marty, Carl Preston.
17
00:03:17,083 --> 00:03:19,291
Marty wants to
write a novel. I mean,
that's what he told me.
18
00:03:19,291 --> 00:03:20,375
So, what are you gonna
write about, Marty?
19
00:03:20,375 --> 00:03:22,458
Adventures in new
product development?
20
00:03:22,458 --> 00:03:23,625
No, no,
I just said someday...
21
00:03:23,625 --> 00:03:25,875
Well, my point exactly,
"someday."
22
00:03:25,875 --> 00:03:28,875
Martin Harvey?
Sign on the line.
23
00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:31,000
Someday I'll retire
to Wisconsin.
24
00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:33,500
Someday we'll all have
more time for our kids.
25
00:03:33,500 --> 00:03:36,083
Someday Marty
will do something
worth writing about.
26
00:03:36,083 --> 00:03:39,125
Well, what if someday
never comes and this is
all there is, huh? Huh?
27
00:03:39,125 --> 00:03:40,959
Oh, my floor.
Coming through.
28
00:03:40,959 --> 00:03:43,125
Come on, folks,
let's go, step lively.
Come on, coming off.
29
00:04:06,500 --> 00:04:07,583
Going down!
30
00:04:12,667 --> 00:04:14,959
Junk!
31
00:04:14,959 --> 00:04:16,333
How much junk
can one person carry?
32
00:04:24,542 --> 00:04:27,291
I'm com... Oh, God!
33
00:04:27,291 --> 00:04:29,166
Caroline,
I asked you to do...
34
00:04:30,500 --> 00:04:31,750
Yes!
35
00:04:31,750 --> 00:04:33,417
Oh.
36
00:04:33,417 --> 00:04:34,458
Hi, Mrs. Holtzman,
how are you?
37
00:04:42,542 --> 00:04:43,959
Oh!
38
00:04:55,083 --> 00:04:58,375
Well, it's not gonna
happen at that price.
That's all there is to it.
39
00:04:58,375 --> 00:05:02,291
Katherine,
I have a couple of pieces
of really big news.
40
00:05:02,291 --> 00:05:03,375
Uh, yeah, well,
let's see here.
41
00:05:03,375 --> 00:05:09,500
You've got 532 square feet.
42
00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:14,208
Right. So there's
no way you're gonna
come in under $1,600.
43
00:05:14,208 --> 00:05:17,542
Right, uh-huh.
44
00:05:17,542 --> 00:05:20,667
Well, I do too,
but listen, I've just got
one word to say to you...
45
00:05:20,667 --> 00:05:22,000
And that's...
Congoleum!
46
00:05:24,041 --> 00:05:24,708
Right.
47
00:05:26,417 --> 00:05:28,542
Uh-huh.
48
00:05:28,542 --> 00:05:31,708
Well, no, no.
Clearly we both prefer tile.
49
00:05:31,708 --> 00:05:32,708
I mean,
there's just no question.
50
00:05:37,250 --> 00:05:38,417
You know what, Mrs. Holtzman,
I'm gonna call you
right back.
51
00:05:38,417 --> 00:05:40,125
Is that all right?
52
00:05:40,125 --> 00:05:43,500
Great. Because... No.
And don't sign anything
till you talk to me.
53
00:05:43,500 --> 00:05:46,041
Great. Great.
54
00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:48,083
Mmm-hmm.
55
00:05:48,083 --> 00:05:50,750
Fine, great.
Okay, okay, soon. Bye.
56
00:05:55,959 --> 00:05:57,250
Martin?
57
00:05:59,250 --> 00:06:00,583
What is he doing home
so early?
58
00:06:04,083 --> 00:06:05,792
I'm home!
59
00:06:05,792 --> 00:06:06,917
Martin?
60
00:06:06,917 --> 00:06:08,583
Mom?
61
00:06:08,583 --> 00:06:09,625
Martin!
Mom!
62
00:06:11,583 --> 00:06:13,875
Martin!
Mom!
63
00:06:13,875 --> 00:06:15,125
What are you
doing up there?
64
00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:18,000
Do you remember
my Uncle William?
65
00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:21,125
The guy who ran off,
sailed off in 1962
and never came back?
66
00:06:21,125 --> 00:06:21,959
Yeah.
67
00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:26,792
Oh, no, don't tell me.
He's back?
68
00:06:26,792 --> 00:06:30,000
Well, oh. Let me guess.
He's coming here
for a visit, right?
69
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,792
Honey, I can't.
I really can't.
70
00:06:31,792 --> 00:06:34,333
This has just been
the worst possible week.
71
00:06:34,333 --> 00:06:35,792
Don't worry,
he's not coming to visit.
72
00:06:35,792 --> 00:06:37,000
Well, thank God.
He's dead.
73
00:06:38,333 --> 00:06:39,250
Oh. Oh, God.
74
00:06:48,792 --> 00:06:50,417
There I am
the last time I saw him.
75
00:06:50,417 --> 00:06:51,625
Look at you.
76
00:06:51,625 --> 00:06:53,708
Yeah, and he left us that.
77
00:06:53,708 --> 00:06:55,792
What?
An old boat steering wheel?
78
00:06:55,792 --> 00:06:57,291
No. It's not
just the helm.
79
00:06:57,291 --> 00:06:58,333
It's everything the helm
is attached to.
80
00:06:59,750 --> 00:07:02,041
You inherited an old boat.
81
00:07:02,041 --> 00:07:03,625
Wow.
We're getting a boat?
Too cool!
82
00:07:06,834 --> 00:07:09,834
Ben, remember our discussion
about eavesdropping?
83
00:07:09,834 --> 00:07:12,500
Okay.
But we're getting a boat?
84
00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:14,333
Uh, your father and I
have to talk about it.
85
00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:15,500
All right,
we're getting a boat.
86
00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:19,667
It's not just
an old boat.
87
00:07:19,667 --> 00:07:22,333
He bought it from
the Clark Gable estate,
for God's sake!
88
00:07:22,333 --> 00:07:24,917
Are you serious?
Absolutely. So I phoned
three boat brokers.
89
00:07:24,917 --> 00:07:28,500
She's worth over
a quarter of
a million dollars.
90
00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:30,333
Get out of here!
91
00:07:30,333 --> 00:07:32,166
Honey, we can
really use that money!
92
00:07:32,166 --> 00:07:33,959
Yeah.
93
00:07:33,959 --> 00:07:36,166
We can get out from under
the second on the house
94
00:07:36,166 --> 00:07:38,667
and pay off
the credit card debt.
Oh, this is great.
95
00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:40,166
How quick can we sell it?
96
00:07:41,708 --> 00:07:45,583
Well, there's, uh...
There's one little catch.
97
00:07:45,583 --> 00:07:49,417
It's... It's on this island,
San Pomme de Terre.
98
00:07:49,417 --> 00:07:50,708
Doesn't that
sound romantic?
99
00:07:50,708 --> 00:07:51,750
That means potato.
100
00:07:51,750 --> 00:07:53,667
No, it doesn't.
101
00:07:53,667 --> 00:07:55,792
Now, it has to be
brought to Miami
if we want to sell it.
102
00:07:55,792 --> 00:07:58,083
Yes, it does, honey.
It means Saint Potato.
103
00:07:58,083 --> 00:08:00,542
Katherine,
it's not the point,
really, okay?
104
00:08:00,542 --> 00:08:03,250
The point is,
we can sail it ourselves.
105
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:05,750
We don't know
anything about sailing!
106
00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:07,583
We don't have to
because it's got an engine.
107
00:08:07,583 --> 00:08:10,333
You know, we can put it
under power until
we get the hang of sailing.
108
00:08:10,333 --> 00:08:12,333
Honey, I don't care
if it has an engine or not.
109
00:08:12,333 --> 00:08:13,708
We don't know
how to drive a boat!
110
00:08:13,708 --> 00:08:14,834
Yeah, well,
I figured that out.
111
00:08:14,834 --> 00:08:16,583
You see, the Caribbean
is filled with boat captains.
112
00:08:16,583 --> 00:08:18,250
So, what we do is
we hire a boat captain.
113
00:08:18,250 --> 00:08:21,417
He takes the boat
to Miami with us,
114
00:08:21,417 --> 00:08:23,083
teaching us how to sail
at the same time. See?
115
00:08:23,083 --> 00:08:24,583
Mmm. Mmm-hmm.
116
00:08:24,583 --> 00:08:28,250
Thirty, 45 days under sail.
An adventure!
117
00:08:29,083 --> 00:08:30,417
Oh.
118
00:08:30,417 --> 00:08:31,708
Mmm.
119
00:08:31,708 --> 00:08:33,417
Mmm-mmm. Mmm-mmm.
120
00:08:33,417 --> 00:08:34,750
Mmm-mmm.
121
00:08:34,750 --> 00:08:35,834
What do you mean,
"Mmm-mmm"?
122
00:08:35,834 --> 00:08:37,583
Well, what could I mean?
123
00:08:37,583 --> 00:08:40,500
Mmm-mmm. No. Honey,
we can't do this right now.
124
00:08:40,500 --> 00:08:42,708
I mean, we can't do it.
125
00:08:42,708 --> 00:08:44,750
This is what we'll do.
We'll get a boat mover.
126
00:08:44,750 --> 00:08:46,417
Mmm.
127
00:08:46,417 --> 00:08:47,875
They've gotta
have them, right?
Yeah.
128
00:08:47,875 --> 00:08:49,333
And we'll just
have the boat mover
bring it from there to us...
129
00:08:49,333 --> 00:08:51,208
No, you're missing
the whole point.
130
00:08:51,208 --> 00:08:53,542
It's about a spontaneous
moment here that
we just grab at.
131
00:08:55,375 --> 00:08:58,500
We'll be spontaneous
when we have time, okay?
132
00:08:58,500 --> 00:09:00,792
Can I speak to Jason, please?
This is Ben Harvey.
133
00:09:00,792 --> 00:09:03,083
Oh, and it's
kind of important.
134
00:09:03,083 --> 00:09:05,083
...we gotta pay taxes...
Of course,
we have to pay taxes.
135
00:09:05,083 --> 00:09:06,834
And, I mean,
who knows how much
we're actually gonna net.
136
00:09:06,834 --> 00:09:08,792
It's not about money.
I'm talking about
a lifetime experience.
137
00:09:08,792 --> 00:09:10,667
Jason, guess what?
We're getting a boat, man!
138
00:09:12,125 --> 00:09:13,417
- Got to go.
- I'll call you back.
139
00:09:13,417 --> 00:09:14,917
Okay,
who was thoughtless enough
140
00:09:14,917 --> 00:09:17,458
to put food
on the kitchen table?
141
00:09:17,458 --> 00:09:18,417
Did you do this?
142
00:09:19,792 --> 00:09:20,458
Do what, Mom?
143
00:09:26,834 --> 00:09:29,291
All my modifications
are washed off.
Katherine...
144
00:09:29,291 --> 00:09:31,792
It's a week's worth
of work. And it's gone.
145
00:09:31,792 --> 00:09:32,959
Katherine, honest to God,
listen to yourself right now.
146
00:09:32,959 --> 00:09:34,458
Dad...
You know?
147
00:09:34,458 --> 00:09:36,458
Floor coverings and window
treatments have now become
148
00:09:36,458 --> 00:09:38,542
the biggest thing
in your life.
Dad?
149
00:09:38,542 --> 00:09:41,417
And I don't think we're
paying enough attention
to our children!
150
00:09:41,417 --> 00:09:42,959
Dad!
Ben, would you please
stop interrupting?
151
00:09:42,959 --> 00:09:44,500
We're trying to have
a family discussion here.
152
00:09:44,500 --> 00:09:47,750
What about your job, huh?
What about my clients?
153
00:09:47,750 --> 00:09:51,250
And let's talk about the fact
that we have children
that are in school!
154
00:09:51,250 --> 00:09:52,166
Oh, we'll take 'em out
of the school.
Awesome!
155
00:09:52,166 --> 00:09:53,959
Oh, come on!
156
00:09:53,959 --> 00:09:55,708
Oh, you think we're
getting our educational
dollars' worth here?
157
00:09:55,708 --> 00:09:57,166
What's two plus three?
Uh...
158
00:09:57,166 --> 00:09:58,542
At least we're gonna
broaden their horizons.
159
00:09:58,542 --> 00:10:01,041
Five!
Atta boy. You know...
160
00:10:01,041 --> 00:10:04,166
Don't you try to
guilt trip me over this.
161
00:10:04,166 --> 00:10:05,959
I'm not trying to
guilt trip you into anything.
That's totally...
162
00:10:05,959 --> 00:10:08,250
Yes, you are. You are.
You always do this to me.
163
00:10:08,250 --> 00:10:10,000
Look, it is
pathetic, Katherine.
164
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:12,500
We have an 11-year-old boy
and a 16-year-old daughter
who know nothing about life.
165
00:10:23,208 --> 00:10:24,667
Give me a sec
to tell 'em, okay?
166
00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:25,834
This is so cool!
167
00:10:28,208 --> 00:10:30,625
What can I say
to make you
at least consider it?
168
00:10:30,625 --> 00:10:33,125
I can't think of anything
that anyone could say
169
00:10:33,125 --> 00:10:35,041
to make me want to
drop everything,
170
00:10:35,041 --> 00:10:36,333
go to the other side
of the world
171
00:10:36,333 --> 00:10:39,542
to a place that no one's
ever even heard of.
172
00:10:39,542 --> 00:10:42,959
Oh, Mom, Dad, guess what?
173
00:10:42,959 --> 00:10:44,208
I got engaged.
174
00:10:50,166 --> 00:10:52,375
Yo, Mom, Dad.
175
00:10:57,333 --> 00:10:58,208
What?
176
00:11:12,125 --> 00:11:13,250
♪ Stir it up
177
00:11:16,208 --> 00:11:18,917
♪ Little darling,
stir it up
178
00:11:20,875 --> 00:11:22,250
♪ Come on, baby
179
00:11:23,959 --> 00:11:25,542
♪ Come on
and stir it up
180
00:11:28,750 --> 00:11:31,291
♪ Little darling ♪
181
00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:34,291
Ah, yes. These are some
of your uncle's things,
182
00:11:34,291 --> 00:11:35,750
removed for safekeeping.
183
00:11:38,417 --> 00:11:41,750
We took the liberty
of burying him in a place
overlooking the water.
184
00:11:43,750 --> 00:11:44,792
Oh, it's very nice
of you to do that.
Very nice.
185
00:11:47,583 --> 00:11:51,125
We had to. We have no
refrigeration facilities,
and after six days...
186
00:11:51,125 --> 00:11:52,834
We understand. That's fine.
Thank you. It's very nice.
187
00:11:52,834 --> 00:11:54,500
Kate, take a look.
188
00:11:54,500 --> 00:11:57,458
Oh, honey, is that it?
189
00:11:57,458 --> 00:11:59,959
It looks like something out of
Adventures in Paradise.
190
00:12:00,875 --> 00:12:01,959
Are you kidding?
191
00:12:08,458 --> 00:12:10,542
Of course, that was
taken a few years ago.
192
00:12:10,542 --> 00:12:12,125
But isn't she a classic?
193
00:12:23,291 --> 00:12:25,792
Hey, Katherine, kids,
you gotta see this.
194
00:12:25,792 --> 00:12:27,583
This is way better
than you would think.
195
00:12:27,583 --> 00:12:29,750
It just needs a little work.
It's great.
196
00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:30,792
Come on, Katherine, come on.
197
00:12:34,834 --> 00:12:36,041
I'll be right back.
198
00:12:37,166 --> 00:12:38,291
Come on! Let's go!
199
00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:57,375
This sucks.
200
00:12:57,375 --> 00:12:59,417
Katherine!
I'm coming.
201
00:12:59,417 --> 00:13:00,166
Oh.
202
00:13:05,083 --> 00:13:05,834
Whoa.
203
00:13:11,166 --> 00:13:12,834
Clearly the wrong
shoe selection.
204
00:13:34,250 --> 00:13:36,000
Well? Oh, I'm sorry.
205
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:38,291
What do you think?
Honey...
206
00:13:38,291 --> 00:13:39,875
I mean, just look at this.
You gotta see this.
207
00:13:42,250 --> 00:13:44,708
My fault?
You're the one
that got engaged!
208
00:13:44,708 --> 00:13:47,041
Well, you're the one
that went ballistic
over getting a boat.
209
00:13:47,041 --> 00:13:48,875
A ski boat!
210
00:13:48,875 --> 00:13:51,041
Don't push me!
211
00:13:52,291 --> 00:13:54,417
Ben!
Oh, geez!
212
00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:56,417
Mom, Ben fell
in the water.
213
00:13:56,417 --> 00:13:59,041
Honey! Honey, we're coming.
214
00:13:59,041 --> 00:14:00,250
You pushed me!
215
00:14:00,250 --> 00:14:01,834
He pushed me first.
216
00:14:01,834 --> 00:14:03,667
He knows he's not
supposed to touch me.
217
00:14:03,667 --> 00:14:04,792
You did it intentionally!
Ben, swim to the side.
218
00:14:04,792 --> 00:14:05,917
You're a little brat.
You know that?
I hate you.
219
00:14:05,917 --> 00:14:07,959
Oh, yeah?
Yeah!
220
00:14:07,959 --> 00:14:10,083
Okay, stop it!
Don't let that water
get in your mouth.
221
00:14:10,083 --> 00:14:12,417
It could give you
diphtheria or something.
222
00:14:12,417 --> 00:14:13,375
Daddy's coming.
Here, Ben.
223
00:14:19,083 --> 00:14:20,583
Oh...
224
00:14:25,250 --> 00:14:27,583
Donaldson Yacht Brokers.
225
00:14:27,583 --> 00:14:30,250
Uh-huh. All right.
Hold on. Hold on.
226
00:14:30,250 --> 00:14:32,917
Uh, it's Mr. Harvey
and it's a bad connection.
227
00:14:36,625 --> 00:14:39,125
Yes, Mr. Harvey.
How are you?
228
00:14:41,834 --> 00:14:45,792
We just received the specs
on the boat from the lawyers
for the estate.
229
00:14:45,792 --> 00:14:49,458
It seems it hasn't been
surveyed since, uh, 1967.
Have you seen it yet?
230
00:14:51,291 --> 00:14:54,458
Yes, uh, yes, yes.
I'm actually looking
at it now.
231
00:14:54,458 --> 00:14:55,417
Uh-huh.
232
00:14:57,583 --> 00:14:58,959
Well, I'm just wondering...
233
00:15:01,125 --> 00:15:02,708
Yeah, could you hold on
one second, please?
234
00:15:02,708 --> 00:15:04,625
Excuse me, I'm gonna be
a little bit here.
235
00:15:07,458 --> 00:15:08,792
I could signal you
when I'm through.
236
00:15:13,792 --> 00:15:17,166
Yeah, um, I was wondering
what it would be worth
237
00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:19,375
in less than
perfect condition.
238
00:15:21,166 --> 00:15:23,083
I see.
239
00:15:23,083 --> 00:15:25,333
I'll tell you what.
240
00:15:25,333 --> 00:15:26,875
You get it up here
and we'll take a look-see.
241
00:15:29,750 --> 00:15:31,166
Not at all.
Bye-bye now.
242
00:15:34,208 --> 00:15:36,542
- Patti.
Mmm-hmm.
243
00:15:36,542 --> 00:15:38,166
We were gonna send
Chuck Petrie down
to skipper that Harvey boat.
244
00:15:38,166 --> 00:15:40,000
Hmm.
245
00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:42,333
I changed my mind.
Just find 'em somebody local.
246
00:15:42,333 --> 00:15:44,333
A local?
In San Pomme de Terre?
247
00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:46,667
Mmm. Yeah.
248
00:15:48,959 --> 00:15:49,708
Okay.
249
00:16:26,583 --> 00:16:27,667
This here
the Harvey boat?
250
00:16:31,542 --> 00:16:32,750
Who wants to know?
251
00:16:36,917 --> 00:16:38,041
Captain Ron.
252
00:16:47,583 --> 00:16:49,083
Hey, are you
the captain?
253
00:16:49,083 --> 00:16:51,250
Yeah. Ron Rico.
254
00:16:51,250 --> 00:16:53,333
Call me Captain Ron, boss.
Everybody does.
255
00:16:53,333 --> 00:16:54,625
Hi, Captain Ron.
Martin Harvey.
256
00:16:56,375 --> 00:16:57,458
I'd like you to meet
my wife and kids.
257
00:16:57,458 --> 00:16:58,417
Yeah. Hi, Mrs. Harvey.
258
00:17:02,417 --> 00:17:04,250
You old dog.
I bet she keeps
your clock wound, huh?
259
00:17:05,417 --> 00:17:07,583
No, that's my daughter,
Caroline.
260
00:17:07,583 --> 00:17:08,750
Oh, hey, my mistake!
261
00:17:09,917 --> 00:17:12,625
Now, hiya, babe.
Hi.
262
00:17:12,625 --> 00:17:15,250
Uh, Caroline, honey,
maybe you should, you know,
put on some more clothes.
263
00:17:15,250 --> 00:17:17,375
This is my wife,
Katherine.
264
00:17:17,375 --> 00:17:18,792
Hey, what's happening, Kitty?
265
00:17:18,792 --> 00:17:20,583
Hi, nice to meet you.
266
00:17:20,583 --> 00:17:21,917
Whoa!
And my son, Ben.
267
00:17:21,917 --> 00:17:23,500
Hey, say, swab.
268
00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:25,500
Man, what happened
to your eye?
269
00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:26,959
- Ben.
- Sweetie, that's rude.
270
00:17:26,959 --> 00:17:28,083
Ah, that's all right.
271
00:17:29,917 --> 00:17:30,834
Shark attack, swab.
272
00:17:31,959 --> 00:17:33,834
A shark ate your eye?
273
00:17:33,834 --> 00:17:36,625
Yeah, it happened when
I went down off
the coast of Australia.
274
00:17:36,625 --> 00:17:38,625
Uh, your boat sank?
Wow.
275
00:17:38,625 --> 00:17:43,125
No, no, no, not my boat.
My boss's boat.
276
00:17:43,125 --> 00:17:45,625
Yeah, we hit this reef,
huge son of a bitch.
Ran the whole coast.
277
00:17:46,917 --> 00:17:48,291
Wait.
The Great Barrier Reef?
278
00:17:49,959 --> 00:17:51,792
You heard of it, huh?
Smart lady.
279
00:17:53,375 --> 00:17:55,125
Well, let's check
this thing out,
280
00:17:55,125 --> 00:17:57,166
see what kind of trouble
this tub's really in,
huh, boss?
281
00:17:57,166 --> 00:17:59,291
Yeah, just go...
The engine is, uh...
282
00:18:15,166 --> 00:18:15,917
Honey?
Yeah?
283
00:18:18,125 --> 00:18:20,959
Honey, did we get
a resume on him?
284
00:18:20,959 --> 00:18:23,166
Oh, I'm sure he's fine.
You know what I mean?
285
00:18:23,166 --> 00:18:25,125
He's already gone to work.
You know, so...
286
00:18:25,125 --> 00:18:27,500
Okay.
Ah, there's no problem.
287
00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:30,333
I'm gonna just go down
and show him a few things.
288
00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:33,667
Tools on our...
289
00:18:36,166 --> 00:18:38,000
You know, I think
we should tell him
290
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:40,500
we don't know that much
about boats.
291
00:18:40,500 --> 00:18:41,959
I wouldn't worry
about it, dear.
292
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:47,208
Well, it's a genuine
article, all right.
293
00:18:47,208 --> 00:18:49,375
Fairchild Marine,
1,200 ponies.
294
00:18:49,375 --> 00:18:51,083
Whoa.
295
00:18:51,083 --> 00:18:52,834
It drips
a lot of oil, doesn't it?
296
00:18:52,834 --> 00:18:54,667
Hey, all diesels do that.
297
00:18:54,667 --> 00:18:57,041
All diesels
do that, honey.
298
00:18:57,041 --> 00:19:00,834
Yeah, diesels love their oil
like a sailor loves his rum.
299
00:19:02,208 --> 00:19:04,083
Yes, they do.
300
00:19:04,083 --> 00:19:05,333
Why is that,
Captain Ron?
301
00:19:05,333 --> 00:19:06,375
Ah, nobody knows.
302
00:19:07,458 --> 00:19:09,125
Huh.
303
00:19:09,125 --> 00:19:13,458
All right. Now, we're gonna
have to check the oil
304
00:19:13,458 --> 00:19:15,542
and fill her up every morning
before we run up.
305
00:19:15,542 --> 00:19:16,542
It's a greasy job,
but somebody's gotta do it.
306
00:19:17,542 --> 00:19:19,208
Well, Ben,
that sounds like...
307
00:19:19,208 --> 00:19:21,708
No, no,
it's too important, boss.
You better do it.
308
00:19:21,708 --> 00:19:23,333
You handle taking out
the trash, swab.
309
00:19:23,333 --> 00:19:24,875
Oh, man, that stinks.
310
00:19:24,875 --> 00:19:26,208
Ben!
311
00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:27,875
Hey, swab, come here.
312
00:19:30,291 --> 00:19:31,291
Listen up.
313
00:19:32,792 --> 00:19:36,041
The way it works shipboard is,
you do your job.
314
00:19:36,041 --> 00:19:37,750
You do it good,
you get a better job.
315
00:19:37,750 --> 00:19:39,208
Maybe you get promoted
from swab to mate.
316
00:19:40,625 --> 00:19:41,750
All right, get on it.
317
00:19:46,458 --> 00:19:48,959
Yeah, sort of an incentive
kind of a deal, huh?
318
00:19:48,959 --> 00:19:50,583
Aw, that's good.
319
00:19:50,583 --> 00:19:51,917
Yeah, incentives
are important.
320
00:19:54,667 --> 00:19:55,792
Learned that in rehab.
321
00:20:01,250 --> 00:20:02,625
God, it's ridiculous.
322
00:20:12,500 --> 00:20:13,750
Let's see
what we got here.
323
00:20:15,250 --> 00:20:17,125
Oh.
324
00:20:17,125 --> 00:20:18,625
Well, you got
a little dry rot here, boss.
325
00:20:18,625 --> 00:20:20,500
That's okay.
Every boat's got it.
326
00:20:20,500 --> 00:20:22,000
Every boat's got it,
honey.
327
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:23,333
You're lucky.
Yours is above the waterline.
328
00:20:25,583 --> 00:20:27,792
Well,
most of it anyway.
329
00:20:27,792 --> 00:20:29,417
All right!
Let's kick the tires
and light the fires, huh?
330
00:20:35,667 --> 00:20:37,250
Ah!
331
00:20:38,291 --> 00:20:39,458
Hey!
Hey!
332
00:20:47,625 --> 00:20:49,417
I really hate this.
333
00:20:49,417 --> 00:20:51,667
Honey, are you okay?
Will that come off?
334
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:54,000
Yeah, yeah. She'll be fine.
A little turpentine'll
do the trick.
335
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:56,834
Dad, let's take it out.
See how fast it'll go.
336
00:20:56,834 --> 00:20:59,375
No, not yet, Ben.
We gotta make sure
everything's shipshape.
337
00:20:59,375 --> 00:21:00,500
Right, Captain?
Ah, you're right
about that, boss.
338
00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:01,708
Ow!
339
00:21:01,708 --> 00:21:03,291
You all right?
Yeah.
340
00:21:03,291 --> 00:21:05,000
Besides, swab, I borrowed
my buddy's car...
341
00:21:05,875 --> 00:21:06,834
Uh...
342
00:21:10,917 --> 00:21:13,125
What car?
Did he come in a car?
343
00:21:13,125 --> 00:21:14,834
I don't see one.
344
00:21:14,834 --> 00:21:16,375
But he said
his friend's car.
345
00:21:22,959 --> 00:21:24,667
You know, on second thought,
what the hell? We got to
get started sometime, right?
346
00:21:27,208 --> 00:21:29,375
Clogged pores.
I'm gonna look like a pizza.
347
00:21:29,375 --> 00:21:32,375
People think a good
complexion grows on trees.
348
00:21:32,375 --> 00:21:35,208
Wait a minute.
We don't even know if
this thing is safe or not.
349
00:21:35,208 --> 00:21:38,917
Eh, best way to find out
is get her out
on the ocean, Kitty.
350
00:21:38,917 --> 00:21:41,708
If anything's gonna happen,
it's gonna happen out there.
351
00:21:41,708 --> 00:21:44,166
But we don't have
any supplies.
352
00:21:44,166 --> 00:21:46,583
Yeah, we'll pick 'em up
in St. Haag, boss,
about 30 miles.
353
00:21:46,583 --> 00:21:48,625
I'm pretty sure we got
enough fuel to make it.
Push that forward.
354
00:21:48,625 --> 00:21:49,542
All right!
355
00:22:01,166 --> 00:22:03,041
Hey! Hey!
356
00:22:04,625 --> 00:22:06,708
Where are you going?
357
00:22:06,708 --> 00:22:08,542
Capitan Ron!
358
00:22:09,542 --> 00:22:10,750
Where is my auto?
359
00:22:12,708 --> 00:22:13,583
Stop!
360
00:22:21,041 --> 00:22:22,333
What's next?
361
00:22:22,333 --> 00:22:24,792
You stole my wife.
362
00:22:24,792 --> 00:22:26,417
But you're not
stealing my car!
363
00:22:30,625 --> 00:22:32,542
What is that?
I don't know.
364
00:22:32,542 --> 00:22:35,125
Some local dispute
or something?
365
00:22:35,125 --> 00:22:38,250
Hey, boss. Hey, hey,
come here, take ahold.
366
00:22:38,250 --> 00:22:39,458
Are those gunshots?
367
00:22:39,458 --> 00:22:41,083
Hey, Kitty, look at this.
368
00:22:41,083 --> 00:22:43,208
Honey, look.
369
00:22:43,208 --> 00:22:44,125
Keep your eyes out there.
370
00:22:45,875 --> 00:22:48,458
You, uh... You look
kind of natural there.
371
00:22:48,458 --> 00:22:49,834
Thank you.
372
00:22:49,834 --> 00:22:51,083
Spend much time
on the water?
373
00:22:51,083 --> 00:22:52,500
Yeah, some,
when I was a kid.
374
00:22:52,500 --> 00:22:53,542
It shows.
375
00:22:55,875 --> 00:22:59,834
All right. Well, just keep
her pointed due north.
376
00:22:59,834 --> 00:23:01,959
Don't bump into anything.
I'm gonna get some shut-eye.
377
00:23:03,834 --> 00:23:05,750
Uh... Captain Ron?
378
00:23:07,333 --> 00:23:08,917
Should... Should...
379
00:23:08,917 --> 00:23:10,375
Sweetie, be careful.
Yeah, yeah.
380
00:23:10,375 --> 00:23:11,708
Honey, are you okay?
381
00:23:11,708 --> 00:23:13,250
Just fine. Mmm-hmm.
382
00:23:13,250 --> 00:23:14,750
You're comfortable
doing this?
383
00:23:18,667 --> 00:23:20,125
Well, next stop, St. Haag.
384
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:24,291
About 35 miles,
I think,
385
00:23:24,291 --> 00:23:25,291
due north.
386
00:23:31,166 --> 00:23:32,959
Isn't this great?
387
00:23:32,959 --> 00:23:36,291
Look at this.
Open ocean, uncharted islands.
388
00:23:37,708 --> 00:23:39,208
Who knows what's waiting
for us out there?
389
00:23:40,708 --> 00:23:41,792
Come here.
390
00:23:44,500 --> 00:23:46,166
Log entry, day two.
391
00:23:47,667 --> 00:23:50,583
The adventure begins!
392
00:23:50,583 --> 00:23:53,542
What a thrill it is
to be leaving the turmoil
of civilization behind us.
393
00:24:23,041 --> 00:24:24,542
Martin, you see that boat,
right? Honey!
394
00:24:25,667 --> 00:24:27,250
I see it, honey.
I see it.
395
00:24:30,583 --> 00:24:33,583
Captain Ron,
could you come up, please?
396
00:24:33,583 --> 00:24:34,917
Don't worry.
Everything's fine.
397
00:24:34,917 --> 00:24:36,875
Dad?
398
00:24:36,875 --> 00:24:39,208
There's something wrong
with that Captain Ron guy.
399
00:24:39,208 --> 00:24:40,542
What?
400
00:24:40,542 --> 00:24:41,792
I think he's dead.
401
00:24:41,792 --> 00:24:42,750
What?
402
00:24:50,834 --> 00:24:53,708
Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
403
00:24:55,708 --> 00:24:56,542
Ben, stop that.
404
00:25:01,041 --> 00:25:02,750
Tough break, huh?
405
00:25:02,750 --> 00:25:04,667
Guess we'll
have to go home now.
406
00:25:04,667 --> 00:25:06,083
Katherine, is he okay?
407
00:25:10,250 --> 00:25:12,375
Katherine?
I didn't do it!
408
00:25:12,375 --> 00:25:13,917
I didn't do it!
I didn't do it, I swear!
409
00:25:13,917 --> 00:25:15,417
What? What?
410
00:25:16,667 --> 00:25:18,458
Where am I?
411
00:25:18,458 --> 00:25:20,875
Oh, sorry, Kitty.
412
00:25:22,750 --> 00:25:25,583
I do that when I sleep.
It keeps the light out.
413
00:25:25,583 --> 00:25:27,083
What about
your other eye?
414
00:25:27,083 --> 00:25:28,291
Glass, swab.
415
00:25:28,291 --> 00:25:30,583
Too cool!
Yeah.
416
00:25:30,583 --> 00:25:32,959
Won it in a crap game
a few years back.
417
00:25:32,959 --> 00:25:34,750
How we doing
up on deck here?
418
00:25:34,750 --> 00:25:36,250
Oh, this is...
419
00:25:36,250 --> 00:25:37,917
I know, I know,
I don't want to
hear about it.
420
00:25:42,959 --> 00:25:45,125
Well, hi. You okay?
Yeah.
421
00:25:45,125 --> 00:25:46,625
Oh, good.
Eh, good job, boss.
422
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:00,959
Slow down.
There are boats
all over the place.
423
00:26:00,959 --> 00:26:02,667
- Ah, don't worry.
- They'll get out of the way.
424
00:26:02,667 --> 00:26:03,834
Learned that
driving the Saratoga.
425
00:26:05,083 --> 00:26:06,959
The USS Saratoga?
426
00:26:06,959 --> 00:26:08,750
Yeah, the old Sara.
427
00:26:15,625 --> 00:26:17,792
Slow down.
Are you crazy?
428
00:26:17,792 --> 00:26:20,458
All right,
get ready to kick those
fenders over, boss.
429
00:26:20,458 --> 00:26:23,125
Yeah. Fenders?
What are fenders?
430
00:26:23,125 --> 00:26:25,208
Those rubber bumper things
right up there.
431
00:26:25,208 --> 00:26:27,166
- Hold on. Hold on!
- What's going on, Dad?
432
00:26:27,166 --> 00:26:28,250
We need the rubber
bumper things.
What?
433
00:26:28,250 --> 00:26:30,583
Hurry, just hang on
to something.
434
00:26:30,583 --> 00:26:33,208
- We're coming in too fast.
- Just hold on to something.
435
00:26:33,208 --> 00:26:35,750
Caroline,
get off my foot!
436
00:26:35,750 --> 00:26:37,125
I'm not
on your foot!
Mom!
437
00:26:43,750 --> 00:26:44,458
Hold on!
438
00:27:07,500 --> 00:27:10,083
Did you see that?
That was cool.
439
00:27:10,083 --> 00:27:12,750
All right, let's tie
her off and kick back
some cold ones, huh?
440
00:27:14,708 --> 00:27:17,125
Hey.
441
00:27:17,125 --> 00:27:19,417
I guess I'll go with
a margarita, huh?
Yeah.
442
00:27:21,375 --> 00:27:23,708
Hey!
443
00:27:23,708 --> 00:27:26,500
Honey, I got to confess.
444
00:27:26,500 --> 00:27:28,208
I was
a little nervous about that.
445
00:27:30,250 --> 00:27:31,667
I don't know why.
He obviously knows
what he's doing.
446
00:27:38,834 --> 00:27:41,208
♪ Tell me where you been
last night, Caroline
447
00:27:43,041 --> 00:27:46,208
♪ Tell me where you been
last night, Caroline
448
00:27:46,208 --> 00:27:48,208
But I miss Chicago.
449
00:27:48,208 --> 00:27:49,583
I mean,
they've got clubs there.
That's really cool.
450
00:27:49,583 --> 00:27:51,208
I'm engaged.
Engaged?
451
00:27:51,208 --> 00:27:52,625
But it's kind of informal.
452
00:27:53,917 --> 00:27:56,959
Like, not a problem.
453
00:27:56,959 --> 00:27:58,625
Oh, God, I got to go.
454
00:27:58,625 --> 00:28:00,208
Um. I'll see
if I can make it.
455
00:28:01,750 --> 00:28:04,208
Bye.
Bye-bye.
456
00:28:04,208 --> 00:28:07,250
♪ Spend their moneys on rings
and everybody's a thief
457
00:28:10,250 --> 00:28:12,166
What do you think
about Captain Ron?
458
00:28:12,166 --> 00:28:15,583
I mean, uh,
I would be
459
00:28:15,583 --> 00:28:18,125
certainly willing to find
someone else if you're
not comfortable with him.
460
00:28:18,125 --> 00:28:19,750
I think it's
important that you're...
461
00:28:19,750 --> 00:28:21,625
No, I think he's fine.
I think he's fine.
462
00:28:21,625 --> 00:28:24,375
I mean, he seems to know
what he's doing.
He was in the Navy.
463
00:28:24,375 --> 00:28:26,583
Yeah, yeah.
All right.
464
00:28:26,583 --> 00:28:27,750
What about the
eye thing though?
465
00:28:27,750 --> 00:28:29,458
Oh, honey.
466
00:28:29,458 --> 00:28:32,959
I would never fire
anybody because they
were physically challenged.
467
00:28:32,959 --> 00:28:36,000
No.
Frankly, I admire him.
468
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,500
I mean, really,
when you think about
the way he parked that boat,
469
00:28:38,500 --> 00:28:39,708
it was unbelievable.
470
00:28:39,708 --> 00:28:41,291
I mean,
especially for somebody
471
00:28:41,291 --> 00:28:43,333
with no depth perception
as we know it.
472
00:28:43,333 --> 00:28:46,458
Oh, yeah, you know,
he's... He's good.
473
00:28:46,458 --> 00:28:48,166
♪ Take your bundle
and go, Caroline
474
00:28:50,458 --> 00:28:52,458
♪ I said, take your bundle
and go, Caroline
475
00:28:54,667 --> 00:28:57,708
♪ Because I spend me moneys
on rings
476
00:28:57,708 --> 00:29:00,000
Where is she?
She said she'd meet us
out front.
477
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:00,625
What time is it?
Would you just trust her?
478
00:29:07,417 --> 00:29:09,291
Hi!
Hi. How was it?
479
00:29:09,291 --> 00:29:11,291
Oh, it was very cool.
I got rain forests and shells.
480
00:29:11,291 --> 00:29:13,125
Let's see.
481
00:29:13,125 --> 00:29:15,083
See, I told you.
Did I not tell you?
I know, it was fun.
482
00:29:15,083 --> 00:29:16,125
Hello!
483
00:29:20,500 --> 00:29:21,333
Hi!
484
00:29:22,750 --> 00:29:23,500
Hi.
485
00:29:27,375 --> 00:29:29,834
Now, you see?
That's very friendly.
486
00:29:29,834 --> 00:29:31,959
That's not
what you get at home.
487
00:29:31,959 --> 00:29:34,708
♪ Tell me where you been
last night, Caroline ♪
488
00:29:42,959 --> 00:29:44,500
I've done
a lot of research,
489
00:29:44,500 --> 00:29:47,166
and I've plotted out our
course for the whole trip.
490
00:29:47,166 --> 00:29:48,166
I know this is
old stuff to you,
491
00:29:48,166 --> 00:29:50,792
having been a helmsman
on an aircraft carrier.
492
00:29:50,792 --> 00:29:54,667
Oh, I just steered
the Sara,
boss.
Don't really navigate.
493
00:29:54,667 --> 00:29:56,041
Hey, swab, you wanna
get me another brewski?
494
00:29:56,041 --> 00:29:58,708
Sure. Hi, Mom.
495
00:29:58,708 --> 00:30:00,542
What I mean is,
you know these waters
pretty well, right?
496
00:30:00,542 --> 00:30:03,208
Oh, yeah, yeah,
no problem there.
497
00:30:03,208 --> 00:30:05,083
Besides, if we get lost,
498
00:30:05,083 --> 00:30:06,041
we just gotta pull in
somewheres and
ask directions.
499
00:30:08,208 --> 00:30:10,417
You know, Martin,
500
00:30:10,417 --> 00:30:12,917
I've never heard of
most of these places
you have us stopping.
501
00:30:12,917 --> 00:30:15,917
Kate, that's the point
of the whole trip!
This is an adventure.
502
00:30:15,917 --> 00:30:17,500
Who wants to stay in a place
like this every night?
503
00:30:17,500 --> 00:30:19,375
See, and we can visit...
504
00:30:19,375 --> 00:30:23,542
We can visit
sponge fishermen there
and an old monastery here,
505
00:30:23,542 --> 00:30:27,041
fabulous rock formations,
an old Spanish fort.
506
00:30:27,041 --> 00:30:29,708
And then,
if we stay on course
and on schedule,
507
00:30:29,708 --> 00:30:31,708
we'll be there
for Carnival.
508
00:30:31,708 --> 00:30:32,500
Where?
509
00:30:33,417 --> 00:30:34,417
There. San Juan.
510
00:30:35,875 --> 00:30:37,792
Now, that sounds
like fun to me.
511
00:30:37,792 --> 00:30:39,792
- Carnival.
- Yeah.
512
00:30:39,792 --> 00:30:41,708
Where is that again
exactly, boss?
513
00:30:41,708 --> 00:30:42,875
Ah, San Juan.
514
00:30:42,875 --> 00:30:45,834
Yeah. Yeah.
515
00:30:45,834 --> 00:30:49,750
Well, there it is.
I'll just leave this
with you, Captain Ron.
516
00:30:49,750 --> 00:30:53,291
Yeah. That's good, boss.
I'll give her
a good study tonight.
517
00:30:53,291 --> 00:30:55,208
So, I thought
maybe we'd go below.
All of us?
518
00:30:56,250 --> 00:30:58,250
No, just you and me.
519
00:30:58,250 --> 00:31:00,625
Oh. You and me, huh?
520
00:31:00,625 --> 00:31:02,542
Kids?
521
00:31:02,542 --> 00:31:05,208
I think Mom and I
are gonna turn in.
It's only 8:30.
522
00:31:05,208 --> 00:31:08,750
Well, dawn comes early
on a boat. Right, Cap?
523
00:31:08,750 --> 00:31:13,125
Yeah. Right about that, boss!
Happens every morning
just about sunup.
524
00:31:13,125 --> 00:31:15,041
But, you guys can
certainly stay up on deck
for a while if you want.
525
00:31:15,041 --> 00:31:17,291
Maybe play a game
or something.
526
00:31:17,291 --> 00:31:18,875
Hey, now,
there's a hell of an idea.
527
00:31:18,875 --> 00:31:20,500
How about a little
dollar poker?
528
00:31:20,500 --> 00:31:22,792
Oh, Captain Ron, I think
we'll just stick to Monopoly.
529
00:31:24,208 --> 00:31:26,417
It's just... You know.
No, I gotcha.
530
00:31:26,417 --> 00:31:27,291
Come on, swab.
531
00:31:40,375 --> 00:31:41,417
So, what do you think,
baby?
532
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:44,083
First night
in the boat,
533
00:31:46,125 --> 00:31:48,625
waves lapping
against the hull.
534
00:31:48,625 --> 00:31:53,125
You, me, in our
own floating palace.
535
00:31:53,125 --> 00:31:55,500
Skipper, the palace walls
are kind of thin.
536
00:31:55,500 --> 00:31:56,917
We're not alone.
537
00:31:56,917 --> 00:31:58,458
Aha! Thought about that.
538
00:31:58,458 --> 00:31:59,834
Look at this.
The shower...
539
00:32:01,625 --> 00:32:03,417
And a little
camouflage noise.
540
00:32:10,667 --> 00:32:11,542
What are you doing?
541
00:32:11,542 --> 00:32:12,667
What?
542
00:32:19,375 --> 00:32:21,166
What's with you?
543
00:32:21,166 --> 00:32:23,000
Party at the Dutch consulate.
Nice map.
544
00:32:24,083 --> 00:32:25,500
Nice dress.
545
00:32:25,500 --> 00:32:26,834
If anyone asks,
I went for a walk.
546
00:32:26,834 --> 00:32:27,708
Okay?
Mmm-hmm.
547
00:32:27,708 --> 00:32:28,625
Hey!
548
00:32:32,667 --> 00:32:33,834
Expensive night.
549
00:32:43,333 --> 00:32:46,166
Well, now that
you got a little coin
in your jeans, swab,
550
00:32:46,166 --> 00:32:48,000
I say we make the game
interesting, huh?
551
00:32:49,708 --> 00:32:51,000
Well, okay.
552
00:32:52,250 --> 00:32:54,708
Ah, let's say 10 cents
equals $100.
553
00:32:56,875 --> 00:32:58,500
Mr. Big Stakes.
554
00:32:58,500 --> 00:32:59,959
What's that sound?
555
00:32:59,959 --> 00:33:02,291
Water pump.
Oh.
556
00:33:02,291 --> 00:33:04,041
Hey, get your
hands off that.
557
00:33:04,041 --> 00:33:06,083
I was just moving it.
I wasn't gonna drink it.
558
00:33:06,083 --> 00:33:07,375
You bet your little bootie
you wasn't.
559
00:33:09,458 --> 00:33:11,000
You want a beer,
you get your own beer.
560
00:33:15,333 --> 00:33:18,500
Mmm. Honey, wait.
561
00:33:18,500 --> 00:33:21,500
Let me adjust the shower
a tiny little bit.
562
00:33:26,041 --> 00:33:27,583
What's that?
563
00:33:27,583 --> 00:33:28,750
A threesome!
A mop!
564
00:33:28,750 --> 00:33:30,041
Don't go nowhere.
565
00:33:31,291 --> 00:33:32,708
Where am I gonna go?
566
00:33:34,083 --> 00:33:35,708
Lucy, I'm home!
567
00:33:35,708 --> 00:33:37,917
Hello.
568
00:33:37,917 --> 00:33:40,458
It suddenly
got crowded again.
569
00:33:40,458 --> 00:33:42,583
It's a little
cramped in here.
Oh, oh, wait.
570
00:33:42,583 --> 00:33:44,583
I dropped
the wash cloth.
I got it.
571
00:33:44,583 --> 00:33:45,875
Just wait a second.
Ouch!
Ow!
572
00:33:47,959 --> 00:33:50,041
I gotta open the door.
I gotta...
573
00:33:50,041 --> 00:33:52,291
Hold on.
Wait a second.
574
00:33:52,291 --> 00:33:53,583
Stuck?
It's stuck.
575
00:33:54,166 --> 00:33:54,917
Hello.
576
00:33:56,917 --> 00:33:58,417
Don't let it go
down the drain!
577
00:33:58,417 --> 00:33:59,625
Oh, it went down the drain.
578
00:34:06,458 --> 00:34:07,583
All right!
B&O Railroad.
579
00:34:07,583 --> 00:34:09,917
That's a buck-twenty-five.
580
00:34:14,625 --> 00:34:16,417
You just have to
turn off the water, honey.
581
00:34:16,417 --> 00:34:17,291
I'm trying
to turn off the water.
582
00:34:18,208 --> 00:34:19,667
This is a piece of junk!
583
00:34:21,166 --> 00:34:23,625
Try to turn it
the other way.
Okay.
584
00:34:23,625 --> 00:34:25,458
Oh, shoot.
What? Did you drop it?
585
00:34:29,917 --> 00:34:32,625
Three houses,
that's 375. That's 37 cents.
586
00:34:34,291 --> 00:34:36,792
Well, that's
half the money I have left.
587
00:34:36,792 --> 00:34:38,125
Eh, shit happens.
Cough it up.
588
00:34:45,291 --> 00:34:47,000
Oh, man.
We're gonna run out of water.
589
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:48,166
Hang on a second.
590
00:34:54,500 --> 00:34:56,500
Oh, by the way.
You owe me $2.50 for the beer.
591
00:35:00,750 --> 00:35:01,834
- Just calm down.
- I got it.
592
00:35:03,667 --> 00:35:04,708
Oh, God.
593
00:35:06,625 --> 00:35:09,458
Please don't let
my children find me
594
00:35:09,458 --> 00:35:11,208
drowned and naked
in a shower!
595
00:35:14,667 --> 00:35:15,667
There. See?
We're fine. We're fine.
Oh, honey.
596
00:35:18,875 --> 00:35:20,000
Uh, boss?
597
00:35:22,083 --> 00:35:23,333
Yes, Captain Ron?
598
00:35:26,458 --> 00:35:28,500
Uh, shouldn't take
long showers.
Eats up the fresh water.
599
00:35:30,708 --> 00:35:31,583
Thank you
for pointing that out.
600
00:35:36,083 --> 00:35:37,708
Hey, boss?
601
00:35:37,708 --> 00:35:38,375
Yes, Captain Ron?
602
00:35:40,542 --> 00:35:42,875
You know you got
a mop handle wedged up
against the door here?
603
00:35:44,875 --> 00:35:46,708
Yes, I'm...
I'm well aware of that.
604
00:35:46,708 --> 00:35:48,875
Thank you.
I wasn't.
605
00:35:48,875 --> 00:35:50,250
Here, boss,
I'll just take...
606
00:35:50,250 --> 00:35:51,041
No, no!
607
00:35:55,041 --> 00:35:56,000
Oh!
608
00:35:58,208 --> 00:36:00,000
Sorry, boss, I, uh...
609
00:36:00,000 --> 00:36:00,708
No, that's fine.
610
00:36:08,041 --> 00:36:10,000
Oh, I think everything's
under control now,
Captain Ron.
611
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:12,542
Yeah. I'll give you a hand
cleaning up here.
612
00:36:12,542 --> 00:36:14,250
No, that's okay.
That'll be fine. Thank you.
613
00:36:14,250 --> 00:36:16,333
We're good.
It's a lot of water.
614
00:36:16,333 --> 00:36:18,458
Well, it's a boat.
It'll soak in.
615
00:36:20,750 --> 00:36:22,125
Well, I'll see you
in the morning.
616
00:36:22,125 --> 00:36:22,875
Yes.
617
00:36:24,458 --> 00:36:26,166
Hey, you want me to
close the door here, boss?
618
00:36:26,166 --> 00:36:27,917
Yes! That would be nice.
Thanks.
619
00:36:29,625 --> 00:36:31,583
Oh, God.
620
00:36:32,834 --> 00:36:33,583
Hey!
Whoa!
621
00:36:38,458 --> 00:36:39,291
Hey.
622
00:36:42,041 --> 00:36:44,208
You wouldn't be trying
to cheat Captain Ron,
now, would you, swab?
623
00:36:44,208 --> 00:36:46,250
No, honest.
Uh, what happened?
624
00:36:50,917 --> 00:36:52,667
Nothing.
625
00:36:52,667 --> 00:36:53,750
Playing hide the salami
in the shower.
626
00:36:54,875 --> 00:36:55,959
Oh, come on, man!
627
00:37:03,208 --> 00:37:07,000
Trip log, day five.
At sea.
628
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:09,750
So far, our adventure
has consisted
of chipping, sanding,
629
00:37:09,750 --> 00:37:12,166
painting and polishing.
630
00:37:12,166 --> 00:37:15,792
But I am happy to report
the boat is starting
to look a lot better.
631
00:37:15,792 --> 00:37:18,083
You know, all you have to
do to make this
look really great
632
00:37:18,083 --> 00:37:19,667
is just
clean up this wood.
633
00:37:19,667 --> 00:37:20,917
Mom, it's all wood.
634
00:37:23,458 --> 00:37:24,625
However,
I do have concerns...
Ow!
635
00:37:24,625 --> 00:37:26,583
...about certain other
aspects of the voyage.
636
00:37:41,417 --> 00:37:42,667
Whoa!
637
00:37:55,625 --> 00:37:57,125
Aw, man!
638
00:37:59,500 --> 00:38:02,667
Dad, sander doesn't work.
639
00:38:02,667 --> 00:38:03,875
Here, I'll fix you up.
640
00:38:19,333 --> 00:38:20,375
Oh, Captain Ron?
641
00:38:30,875 --> 00:38:32,041
Yeah, boss?
642
00:38:38,917 --> 00:38:40,458
Man overboard!
643
00:38:40,458 --> 00:38:41,417
What now?
644
00:38:43,041 --> 00:38:44,208
Could someone
throw me a line?
645
00:38:44,208 --> 00:38:45,667
Honey, are you okay?
646
00:38:45,667 --> 00:38:48,750
Yeah, I'm fine.
I'm... I'm fine.
647
00:38:48,750 --> 00:38:51,875
Hang on, hang on.
Don't worry, Kitty,
this could happen to anybody.
648
00:38:51,875 --> 00:38:53,250
Hang on, boss.
649
00:38:56,542 --> 00:38:57,917
Always stand clear
of the ladder, boss.
650
00:39:01,583 --> 00:39:03,917
Concern is increasing
about our captain.
651
00:39:07,917 --> 00:39:09,125
He lost our ladder.
652
00:39:10,708 --> 00:39:12,208
Doesn't navigate.
653
00:39:13,792 --> 00:39:17,041
And, in my opinion,
steers badly.
654
00:39:26,417 --> 00:39:27,625
- Jib.
- Jib.
655
00:39:27,625 --> 00:39:29,250
- Staysail.
- Staysail.
656
00:39:29,250 --> 00:39:30,625
- Mainsail.
- Mainsail.
657
00:39:30,625 --> 00:39:32,542
- Mizzenmast.
- Mizzenmast.
658
00:39:32,542 --> 00:39:34,291
- Mizzen boom.
- Mizzen boom.
659
00:39:34,291 --> 00:39:36,750
- Mizzen halyard winch.
- Mizzen halyard winch.
660
00:39:36,750 --> 00:39:38,458
What is this all of a sudden,
Full Metal Jacket?
661
00:39:38,458 --> 00:39:39,959
Honey, you gotta
learn the basics.
662
00:39:39,959 --> 00:39:41,917
And you got
to be prepared.
That's right.
663
00:39:41,917 --> 00:39:43,458
I'm not talking
Boy Scout prepared.
664
00:39:43,458 --> 00:39:44,417
I mean
big-time prepared.
665
00:39:46,458 --> 00:39:48,542
Well, prepared for any kind
of normal accident.
666
00:39:48,542 --> 00:39:49,959
This is
the Caribbean, guys.
667
00:39:49,959 --> 00:39:51,250
El Caribe.
The Spanish Main.
668
00:39:53,959 --> 00:39:56,917
This is the land of
voodoo and hoodoo and
all kind of weird shit.
669
00:39:58,000 --> 00:40:00,625
Whoa! So cool.
670
00:40:00,625 --> 00:40:03,458
Yeah, I think all
we really have to say,
Captain Ron,
671
00:40:03,458 --> 00:40:06,083
is that it's important
to know the fundamentals
672
00:40:06,083 --> 00:40:08,041
and they're not
that hard, right?
673
00:40:08,041 --> 00:40:10,333
Right. Right, any dope
can learn this stuff.
674
00:40:10,333 --> 00:40:12,458
Now, boss. This rigging,
standing or running?
675
00:40:16,166 --> 00:40:17,625
Kitty?
676
00:40:17,625 --> 00:40:19,333
Red running, blue standing.
Standing.
677
00:40:19,333 --> 00:40:21,625
You got it!
678
00:40:21,625 --> 00:40:23,750
I got it!
I got it, I got it.
679
00:40:23,750 --> 00:40:25,000
Come here. Head of the class.
680
00:40:27,333 --> 00:40:28,834
What is it?
All right.
Helm!
681
00:40:28,834 --> 00:40:30,500
The big one up top?
Mainsail!
682
00:40:32,834 --> 00:40:34,333
♪ Well, all right
We're jammin'
683
00:40:38,375 --> 00:40:41,375
Okay, now remember,
684
00:40:41,375 --> 00:40:44,166
when we get the sails up,
you can't go dead
into the wind.
685
00:40:44,166 --> 00:40:45,875
You gotta take her off
a little, right?
Right.
686
00:40:45,875 --> 00:40:47,959
A little this way.
A little that way.
687
00:40:48,500 --> 00:40:50,667
Uh-huh.
688
00:40:50,667 --> 00:40:52,500
A ship's like a woman,
responds to touch.
689
00:40:52,500 --> 00:40:54,166
Power of the wind
in the sails.
690
00:40:56,917 --> 00:40:59,166
Oh, man.
Can you feel that?
691
00:41:00,333 --> 00:41:02,708
Just gotta get
your sea legs.
692
00:41:02,708 --> 00:41:04,792
Now this way.
Try it a little that way.
Yeah.
693
00:41:04,792 --> 00:41:06,041
♪ We're jammin'
694
00:41:08,917 --> 00:41:11,166
♪ To think that jammin'
was a thing of the past
695
00:41:12,708 --> 00:41:14,000
♪ We're jammin' ♪
696
00:41:16,500 --> 00:41:18,542
Caroline, stop whining.
697
00:41:18,542 --> 00:41:20,333
I'm not whining.
I'm complaining.
698
00:41:20,333 --> 00:41:23,166
You guys said
the Caribbean!
699
00:41:23,166 --> 00:41:25,875
I mean, St. Barths
with Mick and Cher,
some kind of Club Med thing,
700
00:41:25,875 --> 00:41:27,708
not scrubbing decks
on the S.S. Minnow.
701
00:41:28,959 --> 00:41:30,000
Honey, really.
702
00:41:35,333 --> 00:41:36,500
I'm not kidding, Mom.
703
00:41:36,500 --> 00:41:38,375
Being a galley slave
holds no appeal to me.
704
00:41:39,125 --> 00:41:41,875
Caroline.
705
00:41:41,875 --> 00:41:44,583
Why can't we take
a Princess Cruise if we want
to be out on the ocean?
706
00:41:46,250 --> 00:41:47,208
Captain Ron?
707
00:41:49,417 --> 00:41:50,625
May I have the camera,
please?
708
00:41:52,375 --> 00:41:54,166
Yeah, sure, boss.
709
00:41:54,166 --> 00:41:56,500
Here, uh, I just, you know,
I saw it down below
710
00:41:56,500 --> 00:41:58,542
and thought I'd take a look.
I didn't use any film though.
711
00:41:58,542 --> 00:42:00,417
Is that right?
712
00:42:00,417 --> 00:42:03,041
Let me tell you something.
This is not a toy.
713
00:42:03,750 --> 00:42:05,417
Okay?
714
00:42:05,417 --> 00:42:07,583
It's a highly complex
piece of equipment.
715
00:42:07,583 --> 00:42:10,417
I can see that, boss.
I mean, there's
all kind of buttons there.
716
00:42:10,417 --> 00:42:12,750
It came with a 64-page
instruction book.
717
00:42:12,750 --> 00:42:14,208
Back in a second.
718
00:42:14,208 --> 00:42:15,875
I've read the entire thing.
Have you?
719
00:42:15,875 --> 00:42:17,417
I don't think so.
720
00:42:17,417 --> 00:42:20,208
Excuse me. Captain Ron,
I was wondering.
721
00:42:20,208 --> 00:42:22,250
Are we gonna be going
to any more, like,
human-type places?
722
00:42:24,583 --> 00:42:25,291
Well, you heard
of Saint Croix?
723
00:42:26,166 --> 00:42:27,959
Yeah!
724
00:42:27,959 --> 00:42:29,625
We're going to the island
just to the left of it.
725
00:42:29,625 --> 00:42:31,000
What's it called?
Ted's!
726
00:42:32,959 --> 00:42:33,959
Ted's?
727
00:42:35,834 --> 00:42:39,083
It happens to have great
historical significance.
728
00:42:39,083 --> 00:42:41,291
Oh, yeah? Probably
a sponge fishermen's
convention there.
729
00:42:41,291 --> 00:42:43,291
Or something more on rocks.
Like we haven't seen
enough rocks!
730
00:42:43,291 --> 00:42:44,583
She's really
a great girl, boss.
731
00:42:46,417 --> 00:42:47,500
Oh, God, no.
732
00:42:50,625 --> 00:42:52,125
Yep, I think you might've
broke this, boss.
733
00:42:53,291 --> 00:42:54,291
I did?
734
00:42:56,959 --> 00:42:58,250
Hey, swab, get me
another brewski!
735
00:43:02,875 --> 00:43:05,083
Day ten.
736
00:43:05,083 --> 00:43:07,834
Sailing lessons continue about
as well as can be expected
737
00:43:07,834 --> 00:43:10,000
under Captain Moron's
direction.
738
00:43:12,375 --> 00:43:14,375
Martin, are you okay?
739
00:43:14,375 --> 00:43:16,333
Don't worry, Kitty,
it could happen to anyone.
740
00:43:31,750 --> 00:43:33,041
Hey, swab.
741
00:43:33,041 --> 00:43:34,125
Come here.
742
00:43:42,166 --> 00:43:44,750
All right. Now,
when you get down there,
743
00:43:44,750 --> 00:43:48,500
grab it,
yank on the line twice,
and I'll pull you...
744
00:43:50,917 --> 00:43:52,792
Ah, never mind, swab.
745
00:43:52,792 --> 00:43:55,208
Listen, you go on
with the boss and
I'll take care of it.
746
00:43:59,333 --> 00:44:01,458
I have to say, guys.
747
00:44:01,458 --> 00:44:04,667
I think this is gonna be
one of the high points
of the trip. I really do.
748
00:44:04,667 --> 00:44:07,083
High points?
This place doesn't even
have a dock!
749
00:44:07,083 --> 00:44:09,708
Yes, but it does have
one of the best examples
750
00:44:09,708 --> 00:44:12,708
of Spanish fortifications
in the entire West Indies.
751
00:44:12,708 --> 00:44:16,041
The cannons, the walls,
they're all still here,
everybody.
752
00:44:16,041 --> 00:44:19,250
Hey, give me
a double bongo bacon burger
and a bongo dog, huh?
753
00:44:19,250 --> 00:44:22,458
Chips, double BB
with bacon and a bongo dog.
754
00:44:22,458 --> 00:44:24,875
- Honey, I don't get it.
- Why are you so upset?
755
00:44:24,875 --> 00:44:27,083
The man took us to
the wrong freaking island.
756
00:44:27,083 --> 00:44:29,041
Martin.
757
00:44:29,041 --> 00:44:32,208
Oh, I mean, come on.
Everybody makes mistakes.
758
00:44:32,208 --> 00:44:35,250
He's human.
Oh, yeah? Prove it.
759
00:44:35,250 --> 00:44:38,208
Hey, kids, what do you say
we make the best of this
and explore the island?
760
00:44:39,375 --> 00:44:41,834
Dad, I just ordered
my chili fries.
761
00:44:41,834 --> 00:44:43,875
How much
for the hat?
Three bucks.
762
00:44:43,875 --> 00:44:47,625
All right, looky there. See?
Everything's fine.
763
00:44:47,625 --> 00:44:51,250
Honey, the kids are happy.
Captain Ron's taking us out
to lunch to make up for it.
764
00:44:51,250 --> 00:44:52,750
Let's just get
something to eat, okay?
765
00:44:52,750 --> 00:44:54,917
Katherine, Katherine,
766
00:44:54,917 --> 00:44:58,375
I have worked very,
very hard to plan
a spontaneous adventure,
767
00:44:58,375 --> 00:45:00,417
and Captain Contagious over
there is screwing it up.
768
00:45:03,500 --> 00:45:04,625
Throw some music
on that jukebox, huh?
769
00:45:04,625 --> 00:45:05,417
Hey, boss!
770
00:45:07,208 --> 00:45:09,750
If you're going back,
stay on the path.
771
00:45:09,750 --> 00:45:10,792
You know,
there's guerrillas
in these woods.
772
00:45:10,792 --> 00:45:12,959
Gorillas? Too cool.
773
00:45:12,959 --> 00:45:16,125
Ben, honey,
there are no gorillas,
not here.
774
00:45:16,125 --> 00:45:17,125
Oh, yeah,
there is, boss.
775
00:45:17,125 --> 00:45:18,834
Sorry, Captain Ron,
776
00:45:18,834 --> 00:45:21,542
gorillas are native
to equatorial Africa.
777
00:45:21,542 --> 00:45:23,917
Okay? No gorillas.
Not here. No way.
778
00:45:26,250 --> 00:45:30,291
Honey, honey,
stay on the path, okay?
779
00:45:30,291 --> 00:45:34,125
Now he's got her
buying it. Unbelievable.
780
00:45:34,125 --> 00:45:36,041
I think he's got
an attitude problem about you.
781
00:45:36,041 --> 00:45:37,542
Who, the boss?
782
00:45:37,542 --> 00:45:38,917
Nah! We're like this.
783
00:45:40,625 --> 00:45:42,959
Well, I don't know.
Some people do
get jealous of me.
784
00:45:42,959 --> 00:45:44,458
There's the Navy thing.
785
00:45:47,667 --> 00:45:49,291
Hey. Mambo.
786
00:45:54,375 --> 00:45:56,000
How about it, babe?
787
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:59,083
Forget it. I can't dance
to this junk. Nobody can.
788
00:45:59,083 --> 00:46:00,667
No?
789
00:46:00,667 --> 00:46:01,667
Check this out.
790
00:46:06,166 --> 00:46:08,333
Come on, Kitty.
You know how to move to this.
791
00:46:08,333 --> 00:46:10,792
Oh, I can't dance in these
rubber boat shoes.
792
00:46:10,792 --> 00:46:11,792
Well, kick 'em off!
793
00:46:13,834 --> 00:46:17,959
"Stay on the path, boss.
There's gorillas
in the woods."
794
00:46:17,959 --> 00:46:19,917
Like I don't watch
National Geographic
every week.
795
00:46:35,166 --> 00:46:38,250
All right, Kitty! Yeah!
796
00:46:38,250 --> 00:46:39,875
Martin and I used to go
dancing all the time.
797
00:46:39,875 --> 00:46:40,875
It shows.
798
00:46:56,208 --> 00:46:58,667
If I find a single gorilla
anywhere around here,
I'll eat it.
799
00:47:15,291 --> 00:47:16,583
Gorillas. Right.
800
00:47:24,417 --> 00:47:25,375
Mmm-hmm.
801
00:47:29,959 --> 00:47:32,500
He could've said
"revolutionaries,"
802
00:47:32,500 --> 00:47:34,041
"freedom fighters." No.
803
00:47:35,083 --> 00:47:36,834
Gorillas.
804
00:47:36,834 --> 00:47:38,458
He did it on purpose.
805
00:47:38,458 --> 00:47:40,208
You can see it in his eyes.
806
00:47:40,208 --> 00:47:41,917
Excuse me, his eye!
807
00:47:41,917 --> 00:47:43,083
Martin, he'll hear you.
808
00:47:44,834 --> 00:47:46,667
Let him hear me.
809
00:47:46,667 --> 00:47:48,959
You know, he did
convince them to let you go.
810
00:47:48,959 --> 00:47:51,250
Oh, I'm sorry.
811
00:47:51,250 --> 00:47:54,917
I forgot.
We're dealing with
a true humanitarian.
812
00:47:54,917 --> 00:47:57,250
Let me see,
there's Terry Waite,
Desmond Tutu
813
00:47:57,250 --> 00:47:58,875
and Captain Ron.
814
00:47:58,875 --> 00:48:00,250
Pretty much
the big three.
815
00:48:03,917 --> 00:48:05,750
Hey, boss, I just
wanted to tell you...
816
00:48:05,750 --> 00:48:07,667
Oh.
A little more
dry rot here, huh?
817
00:48:07,667 --> 00:48:09,458
Ah, don't worry about it.
818
00:48:09,458 --> 00:48:11,792
Listen, I fixed that
winch handle you busted
the other day,
819
00:48:11,792 --> 00:48:14,458
so try and be a little
more careful with it
next time, all right?
820
00:48:14,458 --> 00:48:16,458
Hey! What are you
holding in your hand?
821
00:48:16,458 --> 00:48:17,750
Winch drum.
That's my girl!
822
00:48:20,959 --> 00:48:23,667
Honey,
don't start anything.
823
00:48:23,667 --> 00:48:25,792
I'm just going down to get
a bigger screwdriver.
That's it.
824
00:48:29,750 --> 00:48:31,208
What difference
does it make?
825
00:48:31,208 --> 00:48:33,125
I'm sick of being
the thimble.
826
00:48:33,125 --> 00:48:35,125
Well, I'm the top hat,
so you can't be that.
827
00:48:35,125 --> 00:48:36,500
Be the battleship.
828
00:48:36,500 --> 00:48:37,959
I'm the battleship.
829
00:48:41,750 --> 00:48:43,166
What's this?
Monopoly.
830
00:48:43,166 --> 00:48:44,542
No, this.
831
00:48:44,542 --> 00:48:46,250
Two .45s
and a MAC-10.
832
00:48:46,250 --> 00:48:48,458
It's his total
macho trip, Dad.
Just ignore it.
833
00:48:48,458 --> 00:48:50,000
Where'd they come from?
834
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:51,708
Captain Ron traded
the guerrillas for 'em.
835
00:48:51,708 --> 00:48:53,375
Yeah, I thought we got
to have them, boss,
'cause, you know,
836
00:48:53,375 --> 00:48:54,667
we're getting into
pirate waters here
pretty quick.
837
00:48:54,667 --> 00:48:55,333
What pirates?
838
00:48:57,125 --> 00:49:00,041
Pirates of the Caribbean.
839
00:49:00,041 --> 00:49:03,166
Been to Disney World
one too many times,
have we, Captain Ron?
840
00:49:03,166 --> 00:49:05,333
It's true, Dad.
They come up on you
in high-speed boats.
841
00:49:05,333 --> 00:49:07,208
You know, I don't
believe I've ever
been to Disney World.
842
00:49:07,208 --> 00:49:08,834
Oh, really?
843
00:49:08,834 --> 00:49:10,500
I've been to Dollywood.
You guys are making me
lose count!
844
00:49:10,500 --> 00:49:11,333
All right,
all right, all right.
845
00:49:11,333 --> 00:49:14,667
We are not having guns
on this boat.
846
00:49:14,667 --> 00:49:16,708
Dad, we got to be able
to fight off the pirates.
847
00:49:16,708 --> 00:49:18,959
Yeah, if we don't, you know,
they could steal the boat.
848
00:49:18,959 --> 00:49:20,875
There are no pirates
of the Caribbean.
849
00:49:23,417 --> 00:49:25,708
I don't know, Dad.
That's what you said
about the guerrillas.
850
00:49:25,708 --> 00:49:26,708
And I was right.
851
00:49:28,792 --> 00:49:33,208
He said gorilla,
not guerrilla.
Guer. Go.
852
00:49:33,208 --> 00:49:36,000
Huge difference, kids.
Huge difference.
853
00:49:51,750 --> 00:49:53,458
What was that?
854
00:49:53,458 --> 00:49:56,875
Automatic weapons,
Katherine.
How about that?
855
00:49:56,875 --> 00:49:58,583
Captain Ron thought
we ought to have them
to hold off,
856
00:49:58,583 --> 00:50:00,875
and get this, pirates.
857
00:50:00,875 --> 00:50:02,125
Pirates?
858
00:50:02,125 --> 00:50:03,500
Yeah. He actually traded...
859
00:50:05,083 --> 00:50:06,333
Hold on.
860
00:50:06,333 --> 00:50:07,083
Captain Ron?
861
00:50:08,667 --> 00:50:09,792
Yeah, boss?
862
00:50:09,792 --> 00:50:10,959
What pirates?
863
00:50:10,959 --> 00:50:12,250
Hold on, baby, please.
864
00:50:12,250 --> 00:50:13,583
What did you trade
for those guns?
865
00:50:13,583 --> 00:50:15,208
Well, now,
there's the beauty of it.
866
00:50:15,208 --> 00:50:17,291
Nothing, nada.
867
00:50:17,291 --> 00:50:19,250
See, they needed a lift
into San Juan,
868
00:50:19,250 --> 00:50:20,750
and since we was
heading there
tomorrow anyway...
869
00:50:20,750 --> 00:50:25,125
Look, this is my boat.
Do you understand?
Yeah.
870
00:50:25,125 --> 00:50:27,125
We aren't giving anyone
a lift, especially a bunch
of armed revolutionaries.
871
00:50:28,417 --> 00:50:30,417
Whatever you say, boss.
872
00:50:30,417 --> 00:50:31,959
I'll just give 'em
the guns back and the
whole thing will be off.
873
00:50:37,208 --> 00:50:38,041
Is there a problem?
874
00:50:44,917 --> 00:50:47,291
All right, fellas, come on,
Give me a break here,
will you? Sit down!
875
00:50:47,291 --> 00:50:49,291
Yeah, yeah.
Jesus!
876
00:50:49,291 --> 00:50:51,083
Stand by to set
the mainsail!
877
00:50:51,083 --> 00:50:52,333
Here we go.
878
00:50:54,625 --> 00:50:55,625
All right. Set the mainsail!
879
00:50:58,375 --> 00:51:01,458
Hey, babe,
don't just stand there
watching them do it,
880
00:51:01,458 --> 00:51:04,083
jump up there
and guide those lines!
Okay, okay.
881
00:51:04,083 --> 00:51:08,083
Careful.
Honey, be careful.
882
00:51:08,083 --> 00:51:11,291
Got it, Mom.
Try to control
your excitement, Caroline.
883
00:51:11,291 --> 00:51:13,083
I love her show
of enthusiasm,
don't you?
884
00:51:23,959 --> 00:51:26,291
Wait, wait, it's not
even hanked on.
Hang on, now, wait.
885
00:51:26,291 --> 00:51:29,166
Come here. Come here.
All right, keep us
on a heading of 2-7-0.
886
00:51:29,166 --> 00:51:31,333
God damn it.
Come on, you guys.
887
00:51:31,333 --> 00:51:33,250
You've been through this.
Doesn't take three to do this!
What?
888
00:51:33,250 --> 00:51:35,750
Babe, get on that winch.
Boss, come up here with me.
Yeah, okay.
889
00:51:35,750 --> 00:51:36,291
Ease off on that winch.
890
00:51:37,333 --> 00:51:39,250
Be careful with that.
Yeah.
891
00:51:39,250 --> 00:51:42,166
- Let her up, let her up!
- Yeah, yeah, yeah!
892
00:51:42,166 --> 00:51:45,959
Come on up here, boss.
Give me a hand.
893
00:51:45,959 --> 00:51:47,333
All right there,
bring it down,
bring it down.
894
00:51:48,333 --> 00:51:50,959
I'm telling you.
895
00:51:50,959 --> 00:51:52,500
Gotta get these son
of a bitches hanked on here.
Okay.
896
00:51:52,500 --> 00:51:54,208
Not gonna do any good
floating out there
in the breeze.
897
00:51:54,208 --> 00:51:56,500
Yeah. Oh! I'm sorry.
Hold on.
898
00:51:56,500 --> 00:51:57,834
- No, no. Mom, it goes this way.
- We're all set up. Take it up.
899
00:51:59,542 --> 00:52:00,500
- Today, guys!
- Sorry, sorry.
900
00:52:04,333 --> 00:52:05,625
Wait, wait, wait.
Whoa, whoa! Hey!
901
00:52:08,458 --> 00:52:10,625
Ow, my hand.
Come around
the other side.
902
00:52:10,625 --> 00:52:13,000
You gotta come
around here, boss!
Watch what I'm doing here now.
903
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:13,834
All right, take it up.
904
00:52:20,417 --> 00:52:23,208
All right. Hey!
Now, you wanna go below,
905
00:52:24,875 --> 00:52:28,000
and cut the engines,
kill the fuel lines?
Ready?
906
00:52:28,000 --> 00:52:30,041
Yeah. There you go.
907
00:52:36,834 --> 00:52:38,625
All right, guys.
Vamonos al frente.
908
00:52:38,625 --> 00:52:40,291
Give these guys
some room to work.
909
00:52:40,291 --> 00:52:43,000
Kitty, babe, come on up here
and jump on this mizzenmast.
910
00:52:43,000 --> 00:52:43,667
Atta boy, swab.
911
00:52:45,667 --> 00:52:46,375
Mmm.
912
00:53:08,834 --> 00:53:10,041
Sails nice.
Yes.
913
00:53:18,250 --> 00:53:19,125
See what I'm
talking about?
914
00:53:19,750 --> 00:53:20,708
All right, Mom!
915
00:53:27,417 --> 00:53:30,917
Day 17 finds me
in the clutches
of revolutionaries,
916
00:53:30,917 --> 00:53:32,834
and my family
in the clutches
of Captain Ron.
917
00:53:34,583 --> 00:53:36,625
Next stop,
Carnival in San Juan,
918
00:53:37,792 --> 00:53:38,583
or so we thought.
919
00:53:43,959 --> 00:53:46,792
Look, guys,
you gotta believe me.
You have not been kidnapped.
920
00:53:46,792 --> 00:53:48,542
Captain Ron is a jerk.
921
00:53:48,542 --> 00:53:50,250
He gets lost.
922
00:53:50,250 --> 00:53:51,250
This is his second time
in two days.
923
00:53:55,792 --> 00:53:56,792
So...
924
00:54:00,041 --> 00:54:02,333
Of course, they don't
understand English.
I don't speak Spanish.
925
00:54:02,333 --> 00:54:04,500
So, obviously communications
are gonna be a hair thick.
926
00:54:19,667 --> 00:54:21,500
Well, everything's
cool, boss.
927
00:54:21,500 --> 00:54:22,667
It's like I told you,
you know.
928
00:54:22,667 --> 00:54:24,000
We get lost, all we
gotta do is ask.
929
00:54:25,834 --> 00:54:28,792
What?
Yeah, well, San Juan.
930
00:54:28,792 --> 00:54:31,542
It's behind us about 20 miles.
But, you know, hey, listen.
931
00:54:31,542 --> 00:54:34,333
The good news is
that General Armando
hardly blames you at all.
932
00:54:34,333 --> 00:54:36,041
You know,
I explained it to him.
933
00:54:36,041 --> 00:54:38,041
It's the tides, man.
They can either work for you
934
00:54:38,041 --> 00:54:39,333
or they can
work against you.
935
00:54:39,333 --> 00:54:40,125
Hey!
936
00:54:43,208 --> 00:54:44,959
I don't think
she's waving at you,
Captain Ron.
937
00:54:46,333 --> 00:54:47,834
She's not?
I sincerely doubt it.
938
00:54:49,625 --> 00:54:52,208
Hey, Clarice!
Babe, who you
waving at?
939
00:54:58,834 --> 00:55:01,083
Yeah, thought so.
940
00:55:01,083 --> 00:55:03,208
You know, the second
I saw Clarice,
I knew where we was...
941
00:55:03,208 --> 00:55:04,208
'Cause, you know,
confidentially
942
00:55:04,208 --> 00:55:06,166
I've had these problems
with the tides before.
943
00:55:08,000 --> 00:55:09,708
I'm coming!
944
00:55:11,583 --> 00:55:15,375
You know, every time
I'm up this way,
945
00:55:15,375 --> 00:55:18,625
she, uh, well,
she wants my manhood,
you know?
946
00:55:18,625 --> 00:55:21,125
It's... It's...
947
00:55:21,125 --> 00:55:23,708
Hey, have a good time, boss,
'cause I'm gonna.
948
00:55:32,166 --> 00:55:32,708
Hang on.
I'm coming.
949
00:55:37,708 --> 00:55:40,959
Hey, got you!
950
00:55:40,959 --> 00:55:43,959
Hey, come here.
Put on a pound or two, huh?
951
00:55:43,959 --> 00:55:46,083
Yeah, but in all
the right places.
952
00:55:53,166 --> 00:55:54,083
Whoa!
953
00:56:02,708 --> 00:56:06,250
No, just
rise above it, Marty.
954
00:56:06,250 --> 00:56:06,875
Besides,
you'll probably miss
and hit the girl.
955
00:56:08,625 --> 00:56:11,625
- Dad!
- Don't sneak up on me like that!
956
00:56:11,625 --> 00:56:13,625
Dad, it went
through the deck!
957
00:56:13,625 --> 00:56:15,458
- Dad, the boat's on fire.
- Dad, the boat's on fire!
958
00:56:16,917 --> 00:56:18,291
Mom!
959
00:56:20,291 --> 00:56:21,250
Mom!
960
00:56:22,291 --> 00:56:23,125
Help!
Oh!
961
00:56:24,583 --> 00:56:25,583
Mom!
962
00:56:28,625 --> 00:56:30,166
Dad set
the boat on fire!
963
00:56:31,458 --> 00:56:32,291
The boat's burning up!
964
00:56:33,625 --> 00:56:35,166
Help, anybody!
Help!
965
00:56:51,166 --> 00:56:52,458
Martin,
what happened, honey?
966
00:56:56,917 --> 00:56:57,750
Are you all right?
967
00:56:59,792 --> 00:57:00,792
What makes you think
I'm not all right?
968
00:57:03,250 --> 00:57:04,000
Still there?
969
00:57:06,792 --> 00:57:09,667
Well,
I have to say, this was
worth getting lost for.
970
00:57:09,667 --> 00:57:11,625
This is absolutely gorgeous!
971
00:57:12,166 --> 00:57:14,333
Ah!
972
00:57:14,333 --> 00:57:17,000
I just wish that you
could see it, honey.
973
00:57:17,000 --> 00:57:19,708
I can see it.
I just have these,
you know, spots.
974
00:57:19,708 --> 00:57:22,875
Sweetie, ouch!
975
00:57:22,875 --> 00:57:25,375
Oh!
No, I'm fine.
I'm fine. It's...
976
00:57:25,375 --> 00:57:28,208
What about Captain Ron?
Can we talk about him?
977
00:57:28,208 --> 00:57:31,041
I don't see how we can
get rid of him. I mean,
who's gonna drive the boat?
978
00:57:31,041 --> 00:57:34,041
I can drive the boat, Kate.
You know, I mean,
979
00:57:34,041 --> 00:57:37,542
the Doctor says that
by tomorrow, my retinas
will be absolutely fine.
980
00:57:37,542 --> 00:57:39,875
Well, I think we should
wait until tomorrow.
981
00:57:39,875 --> 00:57:42,375
We'll be in San Juan,
back in civilization.
982
00:57:42,375 --> 00:57:44,041
We can sit down
and figure out
what to do, right?
983
00:57:45,417 --> 00:57:46,250
Tree.
Thank you.
984
00:57:48,917 --> 00:57:51,291
You know, I have to admit
I was against all this,
985
00:57:51,291 --> 00:57:54,500
but getting those
sails up this afternoon
was quite a rush!
986
00:57:54,500 --> 00:57:55,417
For all of us!
987
00:57:56,750 --> 00:57:58,875
And today,
I discovered something
988
00:58:00,083 --> 00:58:00,917
in the cabin.
989
00:58:02,708 --> 00:58:04,041
I could show it to you
if you want.
990
00:58:07,625 --> 00:58:11,166
Uh, the American girls
are very...
991
00:58:11,166 --> 00:58:13,583
What's the word?
Superficial?
992
00:58:13,583 --> 00:58:15,834
Yeah. God,
I really hate that.
Mmm-hmm.
993
00:58:15,834 --> 00:58:18,417
'Cause, like, I'm into
different cultures
994
00:58:18,417 --> 00:58:20,625
and different ways
of doing things.
995
00:58:20,625 --> 00:58:23,250
Like watching Mr. Ed
on TV the other day,
996
00:58:23,250 --> 00:58:25,917
and he's speaking
French or something.
997
00:58:25,917 --> 00:58:29,083
It was like, wow!
He speaks French!
That is so cool.
998
00:58:29,083 --> 00:58:30,083
All right, General,
you're up.
999
00:58:36,792 --> 00:58:37,583
Aha.
1000
00:58:41,750 --> 00:58:44,041
Aha!
1001
00:58:44,041 --> 00:58:48,792
Boardwalk with three hotels,
that's $6,000.
1002
00:58:48,792 --> 00:58:51,417
A penny to the dollar,
that's $60 U.S.
Diselo.
1003
00:58:55,083 --> 00:58:58,375
The General says
that's all the money he has.
1004
00:58:58,375 --> 00:59:00,208
Tell the General,
"Shit happens.
Cough it up."
1005
00:59:04,166 --> 00:59:06,083
It's not like
I hate the guy,
you know, honey?
1006
00:59:06,083 --> 00:59:08,125
I mean,
I don't hate anybody.
1007
00:59:08,125 --> 00:59:09,959
I can't wait for you
to see this.
It's so amazing.
1008
00:59:10,333 --> 00:59:11,166
What?
1009
00:59:12,834 --> 00:59:14,083
Come here.
Look here.
1010
00:59:14,083 --> 00:59:15,792
Mom, can we
get some drinks?
1011
00:59:15,792 --> 00:59:17,166
Yes, honey,
they're in the...
1012
00:59:17,166 --> 00:59:18,125
Blue cooler.
Okay?
1013
00:59:20,291 --> 00:59:23,250
I couldn't...
Uh, could you
get 'em for us?
1014
00:59:23,250 --> 00:59:26,583
Honey, you're a big boy.
You can get 'em. Mommy
and Daddy are busy. Okay?
1015
00:59:26,583 --> 00:59:27,458
I found this while
i was strip...
1016
00:59:30,166 --> 00:59:32,291
Stripping these
cabinets down here.
Look here.
1017
00:59:34,625 --> 00:59:36,583
Here.
Isn't that amazing?
1018
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:40,458
Oh, that is...
That's great.
1019
00:59:40,458 --> 00:59:43,083
Honey.
Oh, your poor eyes.
Come here.
1020
00:59:44,291 --> 00:59:45,250
Here, feel.
1021
00:59:46,417 --> 00:59:48,291
"C. G.
1022
00:59:50,041 --> 00:59:53,625
"plus C.L."
Yeah.
1023
00:59:54,834 --> 00:59:56,166
C...
Can you believe it?
1024
00:59:56,166 --> 00:59:57,917
C...
1025
00:59:57,917 --> 01:00:00,667
Didn't your uncle
buy this boat from
the Clark Gable estate?
1026
01:00:00,667 --> 01:00:04,000
Yeah.
Well, it's Clark Gable
plus Carol Lombard.
1027
01:00:04,000 --> 01:00:07,458
That is great! Great!
Honey, think about it.
1028
01:00:07,458 --> 01:00:10,834
Gable and Lombard
in this bed!
1029
01:00:10,834 --> 01:00:13,542
Oh, honey, with those
cute little cherub guys
up there and everything.
1030
01:00:13,542 --> 01:00:17,542
Isn't it just so amazing?
And the ocean outside.
1031
01:00:17,542 --> 01:00:20,333
It's like
the most romantic thing
I've ever imagined.
1032
01:00:25,000 --> 01:00:26,750
Well, once we get
to San Juan, no more
Captain Ron, right?
1033
01:00:26,750 --> 01:00:27,792
Whatever you say,
honey.
1034
01:00:31,750 --> 01:00:33,166
Hey, who's rocking
the boat down there?
1035
01:00:34,375 --> 01:00:36,875
God!
1036
01:00:36,875 --> 01:00:38,708
It's the dawn of a new day!
1037
01:00:40,041 --> 01:00:42,333
Charged by the best sex
that we've had
1038
01:00:42,333 --> 01:00:44,834
in, I would say,
at least three years anyway,
1039
01:00:44,834 --> 01:00:49,041
if you don't count
that one time in the car,
1040
01:00:49,041 --> 01:00:50,875
and the knowledge
that Captain Ron is about
to leave our lives forever,
1041
01:00:52,000 --> 01:00:54,041
I feel great!
1042
01:00:55,291 --> 01:00:56,583
Ah! Yes.
1043
01:00:59,500 --> 01:01:04,041
♪ I am a man
A seagoing man
1044
01:01:04,041 --> 01:01:05,583
♪ And I've got
a big, big, big, big... ♪
1045
01:01:08,500 --> 01:01:11,875
Honey, let's not forget
we have guests on the boat,
1046
01:01:11,875 --> 01:01:12,250
if you know
what I mean.
1047
01:01:14,792 --> 01:01:16,834
Hi, how's it going? Hi!
Buenos dias.
1048
01:01:16,834 --> 01:01:17,583
Hi there.
Good seeing you.
1049
01:01:24,291 --> 01:01:27,291
And como estas?
1050
01:01:27,291 --> 01:01:29,208
How you doing, guys?
Good to see you.
Right over there.
1051
01:01:37,208 --> 01:01:38,208
Good morning,
boss!
1052
01:01:40,583 --> 01:01:42,917
You know, I, uh,
spent the night ashore
1053
01:01:42,917 --> 01:01:45,333
'cause I figured the boat
might be a little crowded.
1054
01:01:45,333 --> 01:01:49,041
Oh, that's mighty
nice of you!
1055
01:01:49,041 --> 01:01:50,917
Let me ask you something.
How long is it gonna take us
to get to San Juan?
1056
01:01:50,917 --> 01:01:53,667
About four
or five hours, tops.
1057
01:01:53,667 --> 01:01:56,291
And you're sure
you know the way?
Oh, yeah, no problem there.
1058
01:01:56,291 --> 01:01:58,458
Any fool could find it.
Well, let's hope so,
huh?
1059
01:02:05,125 --> 01:02:06,166
Ah, don't worry, boss.
1060
01:02:08,458 --> 01:02:11,583
It's just a little squall.
They come on you fast,
1061
01:02:11,583 --> 01:02:14,125
and they
leave you fast.
1062
01:02:14,125 --> 01:02:17,000
Okay, we have
enough life preservers...
Whoa! Whoa!
1063
01:02:17,000 --> 01:02:20,625
For each and every person,
so don't panic.
Whoa! Whoa!
1064
01:02:20,625 --> 01:02:22,625
Make sure they're
fastened properly.
1065
01:02:22,625 --> 01:02:24,166
All right.
Here's an example.
This tie model.
1066
01:02:25,291 --> 01:02:28,166
They highly recommend a bow.
1067
01:02:28,166 --> 01:02:29,250
No hard knot, honey.
You'll never get that undone.
1068
01:02:31,250 --> 01:02:34,458
Listen, everybody.
Now, nobody should
worry about this.
1069
01:02:34,458 --> 01:02:36,500
It's just
a little squall.
1070
01:02:36,500 --> 01:02:39,458
You know,
they come on you fast
and they leave fast.
1071
01:02:49,375 --> 01:02:52,000
Blub-blub-blub.
Oh, no, no, no!
1072
01:02:52,000 --> 01:02:55,500
No, no, no
blub-blub-blub.
No hundir.
No
hundir.
1073
01:02:55,500 --> 01:02:57,208
We're not going to sink!
1074
01:03:01,542 --> 01:03:02,834
You folks don't wanna be
down here if she starts
to break up.
1075
01:03:09,959 --> 01:03:12,125
Mom, my glasses broke
and the lens fell out.
1076
01:03:14,125 --> 01:03:17,291
Honey, don't worry
about your glasses.
Just stay down there
1077
01:03:17,291 --> 01:03:19,667
and hold on tight,
okay?
1078
01:03:19,667 --> 01:03:21,875
Honey, hold on!
1079
01:03:21,875 --> 01:03:25,333
There's no need to panic.
We know where we are.
1080
01:03:25,333 --> 01:03:28,166
We've got our compass
and we've got our chart.
1081
01:03:28,166 --> 01:03:30,208
You're right about that, boss.
I've got it right here.
1082
01:03:34,333 --> 01:03:35,917
Hang on.
1083
01:03:38,000 --> 01:03:41,041
Hang on.
It's okay.
It's okay.
1084
01:03:41,041 --> 01:03:41,834
We still have
our compass.
1085
01:03:44,375 --> 01:03:46,542
The only instrument
that Columbus had to
get him to the new world
1086
01:03:48,250 --> 01:03:49,959
was his trusty compass.
1087
01:03:49,959 --> 01:03:50,875
Oh, don't lose that!
1088
01:03:53,417 --> 01:03:56,166
Hang on a second.
Go ahead! Go ahead!
1089
01:03:56,166 --> 01:03:58,959
Grab onto that line!
All right, everybody,
listen to me.
1090
01:03:58,959 --> 01:04:01,250
Listen to me!
Yes.
1091
01:04:01,250 --> 01:04:03,708
The boss is right.
We should be okay,
1092
01:04:05,208 --> 01:04:08,041
'cause I know
we're near land.
1093
01:04:08,041 --> 01:04:10,333
Great, Captain, great!
Do you hear that?
1094
01:04:10,333 --> 01:04:12,750
We're almost there!
1095
01:04:12,750 --> 01:04:15,458
Explain to the kids how you
know that, Captain Ron.
All right.
1096
01:04:15,458 --> 01:04:17,792
Someone translate
for General Armando.
Si, yo.
1097
01:04:21,708 --> 01:04:23,208
All right.
Now stay with me.
Yeah, yeah.
1098
01:04:24,792 --> 01:04:27,041
When we left,
1099
01:04:27,041 --> 01:04:31,750
we had just enough fuel
to make it to San Juan,
1100
01:04:31,750 --> 01:04:35,750
and we are out of fuel!
1101
01:04:45,959 --> 01:04:48,875
Oh man, he's gone
stark crazy.
I've seen this before.
1102
01:04:48,875 --> 01:04:51,333
Somebody grab
his tongue.
1103
01:04:51,333 --> 01:04:53,083
Shove a stick
in his mouth. Anything!
1104
01:04:56,583 --> 01:04:57,583
I see something!
1105
01:05:00,000 --> 01:05:00,792
Lights!
1106
01:05:07,750 --> 01:05:09,417
Oh look!
Look, it's land!
1107
01:05:14,792 --> 01:05:17,083
Honey, look!
Look!
1108
01:05:22,000 --> 01:05:27,083
Day 20.
Survived storm at sea.
1109
01:05:27,083 --> 01:05:29,375
Captain Ron is proving
to be more cunning
than originally suspected.
1110
01:05:45,708 --> 01:05:47,792
Honey, I just don't think
we can fire him now,
1111
01:05:47,792 --> 01:05:49,959
because he got us
through the storm.
1112
01:05:49,959 --> 01:05:52,125
Katherine, he almost got us
killed in that storm!
1113
01:05:54,667 --> 01:05:57,333
I'm sorry. I didn't
mean to yell at you.
I really... It's just that...
1114
01:05:57,333 --> 01:06:01,208
See, you don't totally
understand, I don't think.
He's eating my brain!
1115
01:06:01,208 --> 01:06:03,750
Okay?
He's taking over
our lives.
1116
01:06:03,750 --> 01:06:07,208
Honey, you're exaggerating.
You really are.
1117
01:06:07,208 --> 01:06:09,583
Hey, look who I found
dancing with all
the pretty girls.
1118
01:06:09,583 --> 01:06:13,000
Ah, Dad, this is great.
Ben, you don't have
to wear those glasses.
1119
01:06:13,000 --> 01:06:16,708
I really don't mind.
Honey, you know what?
Let's not wear 'em. Okay?
1120
01:06:16,708 --> 01:06:19,375
No, Mom, I'm fine.
Yeah, yeah.
Kitty's right, swab.
1121
01:06:19,375 --> 01:06:21,375
You know, in major ports,
I go without the patch myself
1122
01:06:21,375 --> 01:06:23,708
on account
it puts some people off.
1123
01:06:23,708 --> 01:06:25,708
I don't like to draw
attention to myself,
so I lose it.
1124
01:06:30,375 --> 01:06:34,125
You know, I got
news for you, Ron.
If I had a hand mirror
1125
01:06:34,125 --> 01:06:37,458
right now, and you
could get a load of...
Caroline, come over here.
1126
01:06:37,458 --> 01:06:40,875
Whoa!
That was so cool!
1127
01:06:40,875 --> 01:06:43,417
Great! Okay. Let's take
a walk, shall we?
1128
01:06:43,417 --> 01:06:45,375
Now, you kids keep up.
Okay. come on, let's go.
1129
01:06:52,583 --> 01:06:53,458
Hi.
1130
01:06:54,583 --> 01:06:57,583
Yes, I will,
in fact, admit
1131
01:06:57,583 --> 01:07:00,125
that I think Captain Ron's
a little rough
around the edges.
1132
01:07:00,125 --> 01:07:03,417
No, no, no.
Honey, he is a psycho!
1133
01:07:03,417 --> 01:07:06,708
Well, you say psycho. I...
I mean, what does that mean?
1134
01:07:08,417 --> 01:07:10,458
Swab, help me out.
I lost my eye!
1135
01:07:10,458 --> 01:07:11,542
Do you see it?
There it goes!
1136
01:07:12,917 --> 01:07:15,583
I love this.
I love it!
1137
01:07:15,583 --> 01:07:19,333
I mean, think of it.
This is an experience
of a lifetime!
1138
01:07:19,333 --> 01:07:20,583
Hang on! Hang on!
There it is! There it is!
1139
01:07:21,417 --> 01:07:23,792
Excuse me.
1140
01:07:23,792 --> 01:07:27,417
- Will you please back off?
- I lost my eye, man.
1141
01:07:27,417 --> 01:07:30,083
And, honey,
Caroline hasn't once
mentioned being engaged.
1142
01:07:30,083 --> 01:07:32,792
And Ben...
Yeah, Ben. Let me tell you
something about Ben.
1143
01:07:32,792 --> 01:07:35,583
I wanted this to be
a fantastic bonding
experience
1144
01:07:35,583 --> 01:07:38,583
for the two of us,
father and son.
1145
01:07:38,583 --> 01:07:41,166
Now, he's bonding all right.
He's bonding with
Captain Cyclops back there.
1146
01:07:41,166 --> 01:07:42,417
Honey, he's such
a character!
1147
01:07:46,458 --> 01:07:47,333
Honey, where are
the kids?
1148
01:07:49,000 --> 01:07:50,250
They're there.
They're... Ben!
1149
01:07:51,417 --> 01:07:52,417
They were right there.
1150
01:07:54,083 --> 01:07:55,083
Caroline!
1151
01:07:56,417 --> 01:07:57,291
Benjamin!
1152
01:08:02,792 --> 01:08:03,792
Sorry. Caroline!
1153
01:08:07,166 --> 01:08:08,291
Benjamin!
1154
01:08:09,500 --> 01:08:10,458
Ben!
1155
01:08:13,041 --> 01:08:14,542
Katherine!
Did you find them?
1156
01:08:14,542 --> 01:08:15,375
What? No. No.
1157
01:08:17,375 --> 01:08:20,166
Come on, forget it.
Come on, get up.
1158
01:08:20,166 --> 01:08:22,291
It never did fit, anyway.
Guess you gotta get 'em
custom-made.
1159
01:08:24,166 --> 01:08:25,333
Hey, where's
Mom and Dad?
1160
01:08:30,875 --> 01:08:33,667
I'm just saying,
I don't think
it was smart
1161
01:08:33,667 --> 01:08:36,667
to mention that we
brought revolutionaries
onto the island.
1162
01:08:36,667 --> 01:08:39,875
I'm not trying
to start a fight.
It's just my opinion.
1163
01:08:39,875 --> 01:08:42,250
I was just trying
to impress upon them
1164
01:08:42,250 --> 01:08:44,333
the kind of person
I think Captain Ron is.
That's all.
1165
01:08:44,333 --> 01:08:47,542
Mr. And Mrs. Harvey?
I'm Bill Zachery from
the U.S. State Department.
1166
01:08:47,542 --> 01:08:50,500
I've got good news for you.
Oh, you found our children.
1167
01:08:50,500 --> 01:08:52,417
No, but you're not being
charged with subversion.
1168
01:08:53,708 --> 01:08:54,500
Hey, there's a break.
1169
01:08:56,125 --> 01:08:57,208
But you are being expelled
from the island.
1170
01:08:58,291 --> 01:09:01,542
What? When?
Now.
1171
01:09:45,750 --> 01:09:47,875
What in the Sam Hill
is going on?
1172
01:10:12,125 --> 01:10:14,834
Caroline!
Hi! You guys are
back early, huh?
1173
01:10:16,333 --> 01:10:18,500
What are you doing?
The meringue.
1174
01:10:18,500 --> 01:10:21,333
Honey, where is your brother?
Oh. he's around here
someplace.
1175
01:10:21,333 --> 01:10:25,000
You guys! See, it was
Captain Ron's idea.
1176
01:10:25,000 --> 01:10:26,291
He didn't want us wandering
around in the street
1177
01:10:26,291 --> 01:10:28,250
'cause he said
something might happen.
1178
01:10:28,250 --> 01:10:31,375
So we found this band
and these people and
we just had a party.
1179
01:10:31,375 --> 01:10:33,667
Honey, we thought
you were in some kind
of trouble or something.
1180
01:10:33,667 --> 01:10:35,625
We were worried sick
the whole time
we were in jail.
1181
01:10:35,625 --> 01:10:37,458
You guys were in jail?
1182
01:10:37,458 --> 01:10:39,000
Just don't worry
about jail, okay?
It's a long story.
1183
01:10:39,000 --> 01:10:42,125
Who's this guy?
This is Mamba.
1184
01:10:42,125 --> 01:10:44,208
Oh, he doesn't speak
a lot of English,
but he's really cute.
1185
01:10:44,208 --> 01:10:46,917
And he's a local artist,
and Mom, Dad guess what.
1186
01:10:46,917 --> 01:10:48,917
Don't tell me.
You're engaged?
1187
01:10:48,917 --> 01:10:50,583
Right?
No, I didn't get engaged!
Come on.
1188
01:10:50,583 --> 01:10:53,333
I got tattooed.
1189
01:10:53,333 --> 01:10:56,500
What?
Mamba did it. It's, like,
this cool little rose.
1190
01:10:56,500 --> 01:10:59,166
Are you saying...
Honey, where did you
get this tattoo?
1191
01:10:59,166 --> 01:11:02,959
At Mamba's shop.
No, I mean,
where on your body?
1192
01:11:02,959 --> 01:11:05,708
Mom,
it's kind of private.
You let a guy
1193
01:11:05,708 --> 01:11:07,583
with a spider on his head
1194
01:11:07,583 --> 01:11:10,792
tattoo you someplace
"kind of private"?
Dreadlocks, Daddy!
1195
01:11:10,792 --> 01:11:13,166
Well, you know, Dad,
things could be a lot worse.
How?
1196
01:11:13,166 --> 01:11:14,708
Hey, what happened
to the music?
1197
01:11:18,166 --> 01:11:19,667
Uh-oh. Coming through.
'Scuse me, beep-beep.
1198
01:11:21,083 --> 01:11:22,291
- Sweetie!
- Come back here!
1199
01:11:22,291 --> 01:11:23,125
Excuse me. 'Scuse me, folks.
1200
01:11:24,375 --> 01:11:25,333
Ben!
Honey!
1201
01:11:27,000 --> 01:11:28,083
Ben!
1202
01:11:28,083 --> 01:11:29,000
Whoa!
1203
01:11:34,041 --> 01:11:35,750
Ben!
1204
01:11:38,834 --> 01:11:43,125
Whoa! You hurt?
1205
01:11:43,125 --> 01:11:44,417
See, I told you not
to leave those bottles
laying around!
1206
01:11:45,500 --> 01:11:46,250
You cretin!
1207
01:11:48,375 --> 01:11:51,875
Angeline's no cretin, boss.
She's a Puerto Rican.
1208
01:11:51,875 --> 01:11:54,375
I'm not talking to Angeline.
We're just playing
a game, Dad.
1209
01:11:54,375 --> 01:11:56,542
- Strip Monopoly.
- What?
1210
01:11:56,542 --> 01:11:58,417
Well, that's just because
we ran out of money, see.
1211
01:11:58,417 --> 01:12:00,000
I mean, she is
kicking our ass here, right?
1212
01:12:00,000 --> 01:12:02,125
Where's Ben?
He went that way.
1213
01:12:02,125 --> 01:12:03,959
Don't hide
from me, sweetie.
You tattooed my kids.
1214
01:12:03,959 --> 01:12:06,000
Who is this guy? Already
I don't like him a lot.
1215
01:12:06,000 --> 01:12:09,583
Dad, it's fake.
It washes off.
Oh, thank God.
1216
01:12:09,583 --> 01:12:11,583
Thank God.
1217
01:12:11,583 --> 01:12:14,083
Caroline's is fake too?
No, that's real, boss.
1218
01:12:14,083 --> 01:12:15,375
That's primo work.
1219
01:12:15,375 --> 01:12:16,166
You're fired.
1220
01:12:21,083 --> 01:12:22,708
Boss!
Boss, wait a minute.
1221
01:12:24,542 --> 01:12:27,917
Come on, let's at least
have a dialog here,
boss, huh?
1222
01:12:27,917 --> 01:12:29,625
Captain Ron,
I'm really sorry.
1223
01:12:29,625 --> 01:12:31,083
But really,
giving the children beer,
1224
01:12:31,083 --> 01:12:32,250
and bringing
that woman around!
1225
01:12:32,250 --> 01:12:34,041
We just can't have it.
1226
01:12:34,041 --> 01:12:36,458
- Angeline's okay.
- Roscoe's the jerk.
1227
01:12:36,458 --> 01:12:39,083
Yeah, we saw Roscoe
on our way in.
1228
01:12:39,083 --> 01:12:42,250
And you'll be seeing him
again, man, if I don't
get paid $500.
1229
01:12:42,250 --> 01:12:45,083
For what?
She had Park Place
with three hotels, Dad.
1230
01:12:45,083 --> 01:12:48,125
Okay, let's go.
Hang on. Just curb it
a second, will you?
1231
01:12:48,125 --> 01:12:52,750
Look, boss... Former boss,
what can I tell you, man?
The woman had a system.
1232
01:12:52,750 --> 01:12:55,667
All right? I didn't get it
figured out till just before
you guys got back.
1233
01:12:55,667 --> 01:12:57,417
Now, if you let us back
in that game,
1234
01:12:57,417 --> 01:13:00,250
I'm completely positive
we can whittle that
down some.
1235
01:13:00,250 --> 01:13:03,125
You whittle yourself
out of my life, okay?
And, you,
1236
01:13:03,125 --> 01:13:06,667
Miss Park Place,
tell Roscoe you're
not getting Jack!
1237
01:13:06,667 --> 01:13:11,291
I wouldn't do that, boss.
Well, I would.
You're outta here. Beat it!
1238
01:13:11,291 --> 01:13:14,125
Get your tattoo
back on that boat!
Daddy, you're embarrassing me.
1239
01:13:14,125 --> 01:13:15,792
I'll do more than that
if you don't get going.
Move!
1240
01:13:21,959 --> 01:13:22,750
Caroline.
1241
01:13:36,458 --> 01:13:37,417
Oh, man.
1242
01:14:01,208 --> 01:14:03,667
Well, you know,
it'll take some time
to get over this.
1243
01:14:06,041 --> 01:14:08,834
But we'll get by somehow,
we always do.
1244
01:14:08,834 --> 01:14:09,875
I didn't think
we would survive this.
1245
01:14:12,291 --> 01:14:14,875
- Don't worry, baby.
- In a couple days,
1246
01:14:14,875 --> 01:14:16,667
we'll be in Florida,
we'll sell this stupid thing
and go home.
1247
01:14:18,417 --> 01:14:21,667
We'll just forget
about the whole thing.
1248
01:14:21,667 --> 01:14:23,708
You know, it's something
that seemed like
a good idea at one time.
1249
01:14:25,208 --> 01:14:28,083
Martin? Martin,
you know that Roscoe man?
1250
01:14:29,667 --> 01:14:30,542
Honey.
1251
01:14:35,708 --> 01:14:37,417
The pirates
of the Caribbean!
1252
01:14:37,417 --> 01:14:38,375
What?
1253
01:14:39,041 --> 01:14:40,208
Oh, no.
1254
01:14:51,208 --> 01:14:52,708
So, think we'll ever
see our boat again?
1255
01:15:35,417 --> 01:15:37,041
Hey, guys, hurry!
Wake up.
1256
01:15:37,041 --> 01:15:38,875
What? Sharks!
What? What?
1257
01:15:38,875 --> 01:15:40,875
We're gonna die!
No, land!
1258
01:15:40,875 --> 01:15:42,291
What?
Where?
1259
01:15:42,291 --> 01:15:43,083
Paddle, everyone.
We're gonna live!
1260
01:15:45,792 --> 01:15:47,000
Okay.
1261
01:15:52,333 --> 01:15:54,667
Okay.
It's land! It's land!
1262
01:15:55,792 --> 01:15:57,041
Honey.
Ooh!
1263
01:15:57,041 --> 01:15:58,625
Oh, Dad!
Sorry!
1264
01:16:05,083 --> 01:16:05,959
This is so heavy.
Whoa!
1265
01:16:13,667 --> 01:16:16,667
Where is it?
Honey, I don't care
where it is. It's dry land.
1266
01:16:16,667 --> 01:16:18,166
Yeah!
Let's find
a hotel.
1267
01:16:18,166 --> 01:16:20,625
Okay, now.
First things first. Okay.
1268
01:16:20,625 --> 01:16:24,125
Just calm down, stay here.
I'm gonna find out
exactly where we are. Okay?
1269
01:16:24,125 --> 01:16:26,959
Now, in five-and-a-half
hours, the stores open,
1270
01:16:26,959 --> 01:16:29,500
we can get some clean,
dry clothes.
1271
01:16:29,500 --> 01:16:34,125
So, in the meantime,
I want everyone to dry off
as best they can.
1272
01:16:34,125 --> 01:16:36,166
Back to the raft!
Back to the raft!
1273
01:16:36,166 --> 01:16:38,458
What?
Go, get in the raft.
Just get in, get in.
1274
01:16:38,458 --> 01:16:40,500
Back to the raft!
Martin, what is it?
1275
01:16:46,041 --> 01:16:48,125
Prohibit to pass.
1276
01:16:48,125 --> 01:16:50,500
Look, let's just go to
the most important part
of the sign, shall we?
1277
01:16:52,250 --> 01:16:53,834
Cuba.
We're in Cuba?
1278
01:16:55,333 --> 01:16:56,333
Wouldn't you just
know it?
1279
01:16:56,333 --> 01:16:57,333
What's so bad about Cuba?
1280
01:16:58,375 --> 01:17:00,000
Yeah, I agree with Caroline.
1281
01:17:00,000 --> 01:17:02,333
- It's land.
- Yeah.
1282
01:17:02,333 --> 01:17:04,000
You're now agreeing
with someone whose world view
1283
01:17:04,000 --> 01:17:06,333
is based on
I Love Lucy reruns.
1284
01:17:06,333 --> 01:17:09,208
The world's changed a lot
since Ricky Ricardo. Trust me.
1285
01:17:09,208 --> 01:17:13,250
Honey, they did
the Today
show in Cuba.
1286
01:17:13,250 --> 01:17:16,708
Oh, well, then let's just
get some cigars and relax.
1287
01:17:16,708 --> 01:17:18,542
You don't have
to be sarcastic.
I'm not being sarcastic.
1288
01:17:18,542 --> 01:17:20,208
I'm just saying
it's better that we're here.
1289
01:17:20,208 --> 01:17:22,083
If it's safe enough
for the Today
show,
it's safe enough for us.
1290
01:17:22,083 --> 01:17:24,208
Now, listen.
This is a communist country.
1291
01:17:24,208 --> 01:17:26,333
Since the breakup
of the Soviet Union,
1292
01:17:26,333 --> 01:17:27,542
there's tension
everywhere.
1293
01:17:39,583 --> 01:17:40,500
Dad!
1294
01:18:11,667 --> 01:18:12,542
Martin?
1295
01:18:15,083 --> 01:18:18,583
Is it possible
that we've been
drifting for 16 hours,
1296
01:18:18,583 --> 01:18:20,834
and we've ended up
in the same spot
as our boat?
1297
01:18:20,834 --> 01:18:22,166
Isn't that
a little odd?
1298
01:18:22,166 --> 01:18:25,291
Relatively
speaking, no.
Relative to what?
1299
01:18:25,291 --> 01:18:28,250
To the fact that
the last three...
Hey!
1300
01:18:28,250 --> 01:18:30,708
Creeps,
stay outta my...
What are you doing?
1301
01:18:30,708 --> 01:18:31,583
Stop, Caroline!
1302
01:18:33,291 --> 01:18:34,250
Good one, Caroline.
Be quiet!
1303
01:18:35,291 --> 01:18:36,125
Everyone, be quiet!
1304
01:18:38,834 --> 01:18:42,083
All right.
Now, what are we gonna do?
What can we do?
1305
01:18:42,083 --> 01:18:44,917
The sun is almost up.
We're in an
unfriendly country.
1306
01:18:44,917 --> 01:18:48,875
We have no money, no passport,
no reasonable explanation
for even being here.
1307
01:18:48,875 --> 01:18:51,583
Well, we've got our boat.
No, no, honey,
I think if you look,
1308
01:18:51,583 --> 01:18:52,458
you'll notice
the pirates have our boat.
1309
01:18:53,708 --> 01:18:55,917
You know what?
1310
01:18:55,917 --> 01:19:00,041
It's still our boat.
We cleaned the stupid thing.
We sailed it. It's ours.
1311
01:19:00,041 --> 01:19:03,667
What do you expect us to do?
Well, honey, I think she
expects us to get it back.
1312
01:19:03,667 --> 01:19:06,458
Think about it, Katherine.
1313
01:19:06,458 --> 01:19:08,625
Bloodthirsty,
heavily-armed pirates
against the Harvey family.
1314
01:19:11,917 --> 01:19:13,333
Guys, it would
take a miracle.
1315
01:19:21,041 --> 01:19:22,583
Yeah!
1316
01:19:28,125 --> 01:19:31,750
- It's Captain Ron!
- All right, get in.
1317
01:19:31,750 --> 01:19:34,625
What the hell are you doing?
Creating a diversion
so I can rescue you.
1318
01:19:34,625 --> 01:19:38,083
We don't need you
to rescue us.
Honey, I think we do.
1319
01:19:38,083 --> 01:19:40,708
Get in! Get in! Hurry!
1320
01:19:40,708 --> 01:19:42,875
Pirates, just like
you said, Captain Ron.
1321
01:19:42,875 --> 01:19:45,375
Yeah. Pirates are easy.
It's the Cuban cops
you gotta worry about.
1322
01:19:45,375 --> 01:19:47,625
Grand theft auto
is a major biggie
around here.
1323
01:19:47,625 --> 01:19:49,542
- Grand theft auto?
1324
01:19:52,208 --> 01:19:54,667
You stole
this car?
Borrowed it, boss.
1325
01:19:54,667 --> 01:19:55,750
Are there seat belts?
1326
01:19:55,750 --> 01:19:56,875
How'd you know
where to find us, Captain Ron?
1327
01:19:56,875 --> 01:19:59,041
Didn't.
You just got lucky.
That's your opinion.
1328
01:20:34,208 --> 01:20:35,041
Huh?
1329
01:20:41,667 --> 01:20:42,542
What happened?
1330
01:21:16,250 --> 01:21:18,750
All right, you fire up
the boat, boss.
1331
01:21:18,750 --> 01:21:22,333
I'll take 'em around again
and ditch the pirates!
No!
1332
01:21:22,333 --> 01:21:23,959
Honey,
we'll be right back!
1333
01:21:25,583 --> 01:21:27,792
Oh!
1334
01:21:45,625 --> 01:21:47,500
Ow!
1335
01:22:00,333 --> 01:22:02,041
Sh... Come on.
1336
01:22:06,458 --> 01:22:07,291
Watch this!
1337
01:22:18,000 --> 01:22:19,917
You jerks!
1338
01:22:19,917 --> 01:22:23,000
That was so cool.
You totally faked
those guys out.
1339
01:22:23,000 --> 01:22:25,834
I'm really glad you're back,
Captain Ron.
And I'm there for you, swab.
1340
01:22:25,834 --> 01:22:29,208
Dad, he tries, but he
usually screws things up.
Not like you.
1341
01:22:29,208 --> 01:22:32,166
Lighten up.
You know, Dad does
the best he can.
1342
01:22:32,166 --> 01:22:32,667
I mean, it's not
his fault that...
1343
01:22:47,708 --> 01:22:48,542
Start!
1344
01:22:50,875 --> 01:22:53,500
I hate you.
I hate everything about you,
you stupid, ugly-looking...
1345
01:23:01,083 --> 01:23:02,041
All right, everybody
grab their shit!
1346
01:23:06,667 --> 01:23:08,875
Come on.
Come on.
1347
01:23:08,875 --> 01:23:11,542
Oh, no, he hasn't
gotten it started yet.
Hang on. Hang on a second.
1348
01:23:11,542 --> 01:23:14,166
Mom?
Uh, you guys
wait here a minute,
1349
01:23:14,166 --> 01:23:15,542
and I'll see if I can
give him a hand.
1350
01:23:20,375 --> 01:23:21,542
Come on.
It'll be okay.
1351
01:23:23,083 --> 01:23:24,041
Oh! Kids!
1352
01:23:28,375 --> 01:23:31,250
Oh, shit.
Come on!
On the top, quick!
1353
01:23:33,959 --> 01:23:36,417
Ben, get down
and stay down.
Okay.
1354
01:23:36,417 --> 01:23:36,750
Hurry,
up on the bow.
1355
01:23:39,417 --> 01:23:40,250
Mom, slack off.
1356
01:23:41,667 --> 01:23:42,583
Look!
1357
01:23:44,667 --> 01:23:45,417
Okay,
all aboard!
1358
01:23:49,375 --> 01:23:51,959
Yes! Good!
1359
01:23:51,959 --> 01:23:52,750
Off we go.
1360
01:23:55,250 --> 01:23:57,375
Sorry, boss.
1361
01:23:57,375 --> 01:23:59,333
Fell. I think
I broke my leg.
1362
01:23:59,333 --> 01:24:01,250
Dad, help! Dad!
1363
01:24:04,500 --> 01:24:08,625
Dad, help! Dad!
1364
01:24:11,417 --> 01:24:13,792
Dad! Dad!
1365
01:24:13,792 --> 01:24:15,083
Dad, over there!
1366
01:24:22,041 --> 01:24:24,458
Whoa!
1367
01:24:29,708 --> 01:24:30,458
Wow!
1368
01:24:31,959 --> 01:24:34,959
Look, Mom!
Did you see that?
1369
01:24:34,959 --> 01:24:38,792
Well, just don't sit there.
Someone pull me in, come on.
1370
01:24:38,792 --> 01:24:40,625
Kids, grab the main sheet!
Bring him in!
1371
01:24:42,500 --> 01:24:45,708
- Caroline, come on!
- Hold on, Dad!
1372
01:24:45,708 --> 01:24:48,417
We gotcha, Dad.
We gotcha.
Hold on.
1373
01:24:48,417 --> 01:24:50,500
A couple more feet,
then you're here, Dad.
1374
01:24:50,500 --> 01:24:51,834
Pull me in. Okay.
Okay, come on.
1375
01:24:54,083 --> 01:24:57,166
All right!
Oh, Dad!
1376
01:24:57,166 --> 01:24:59,542
That was the coolest thing
I've ever seen.
1377
01:24:59,542 --> 01:25:02,875
You say that now!
Okay, just tie this up, okay?
1378
01:25:02,875 --> 01:25:03,959
Yeah, okay.
Ben, grab the line.
1379
01:25:05,959 --> 01:25:07,500
Martin,
are you all right?
1380
01:25:09,500 --> 01:25:12,041
Yes, I'm fine.
Captain Ron broke
his leg, though, I think.
1381
01:25:12,041 --> 01:25:13,500
What? Oh.
I'm serious.
Better go see.
1382
01:25:15,125 --> 01:25:17,500
Yay, Dad!
Yay, Ben!
1383
01:25:17,500 --> 01:25:18,500
Kitty, that's all right.
I'm...
1384
01:25:21,375 --> 01:25:22,834
Stupid pirates.
Who do they think
they are, anyway?
1385
01:25:24,458 --> 01:25:26,250
I just wish we
had it all on video.
Oh, Daddy.
1386
01:25:26,250 --> 01:25:29,708
That's a good idea.
We'll do that.
Okay, okay.
1387
01:25:29,708 --> 01:25:32,375
That was so cool!
Did you show
those guys or what?
1388
01:25:32,375 --> 01:25:34,667
You know about
broken bones, huh?
Yeah.
1389
01:25:34,667 --> 01:25:37,208
I took a Red Cross
first aid course.
1390
01:25:37,208 --> 01:25:39,125
It shows.
Yeah.
1391
01:25:39,125 --> 01:25:40,583
All right, here.
1392
01:25:40,583 --> 01:25:41,583
All right, now,
we're gonna get a splint.
1393
01:25:43,583 --> 01:25:46,083
Oh, shoot! I was supposed
to do the splint first.
That's all right.
1394
01:25:46,083 --> 01:25:48,041
All right, kids.
Nothing can stop us now.
1395
01:25:53,500 --> 01:25:55,583
You go tell the boss there's
a small island out there.
1396
01:25:55,583 --> 01:25:59,208
All right? Los Palominos.
It's on the chart.
Okay.
1397
01:25:59,208 --> 01:26:01,208
All we gotta do
is get there,
everything's Jake.
1398
01:26:01,208 --> 01:26:02,792
We're out
of Cuban waters.
1399
01:26:02,792 --> 01:26:03,834
Do you
smell something?
1400
01:26:07,208 --> 01:26:08,250
Dad, what's that?
1401
01:26:09,875 --> 01:26:10,875
Oh, my God!
1402
01:26:16,500 --> 01:26:17,250
Martin?
1403
01:26:18,500 --> 01:26:19,708
Okay, okay, now, hold on.
1404
01:26:21,417 --> 01:26:22,542
Not much point,
boss.
1405
01:26:25,917 --> 01:26:28,083
Bearings just burned out.
Well, what does that mean?
1406
01:26:29,917 --> 01:26:31,208
It means I forgot
to fill it with oil.
1407
01:26:37,458 --> 01:26:40,125
Well, what do we do?
There's gotta be
something.
1408
01:26:40,125 --> 01:26:41,375
Well, Captain Ron can we...
Not this time, swab.
1409
01:26:42,750 --> 01:26:44,625
I'm kind of
out of action here.
1410
01:26:44,625 --> 01:26:45,750
Bone's about to punch
through the skin.
1411
01:26:49,625 --> 01:26:53,417
Boss, them pirate guys
usually don't like to lose.
1412
01:26:53,417 --> 01:26:55,125
It's an honor
kind of a deal with them.
1413
01:26:58,166 --> 01:26:58,959
Mr. Harvey,
1414
01:27:00,959 --> 01:27:02,125
I crossed these guys
once before.
1415
01:27:05,291 --> 01:27:08,125
And they can get to be
a little... Little messy,
you know what I mean?
1416
01:27:17,000 --> 01:27:19,417
Okay, on deck.
We're gonna get
the sails up.
1417
01:27:19,417 --> 01:27:21,542
Dad, we don't... Yes.
You wanna save
this boat or not?
1418
01:27:21,542 --> 01:27:23,500
Then let's go.
Okay. You heard your father.
Come on. Move it, quick.
1419
01:27:23,500 --> 01:27:26,166
Yeah! That's more like it.
Now you're talking!
1420
01:27:26,166 --> 01:27:28,291
You can do it, mates!
I've never seen such sailors,
1421
01:27:28,291 --> 01:27:30,500
not in all my born days,
I ain't.
1422
01:27:30,500 --> 01:27:32,166
Naturals!
By God, everyone
of you's naturals.
1423
01:27:34,333 --> 01:27:36,917
We're gonna fucking die.
1424
01:27:36,917 --> 01:27:38,291
Okay, you all know
what to do.
1425
01:27:41,333 --> 01:27:42,166
Man!
1426
01:27:46,708 --> 01:27:49,708
Caroline,
get the gaskets!
Yeah.
1427
01:27:49,708 --> 01:27:52,875
All right, Katherine,
on the mizzenmast.
Ben, tail the main sheet.
1428
01:27:52,875 --> 01:27:53,333
I got the staysail.
1429
01:28:02,542 --> 01:28:03,500
Go, Katy, go!
1430
01:28:13,959 --> 01:28:16,333
We're too far
into the wind.
1431
01:28:16,333 --> 01:28:17,750
We gotta
bring her around.
Okay.
1432
01:28:21,333 --> 01:28:22,208
Caroline, come here!
1433
01:28:24,667 --> 01:28:25,375
Right. Sorry.
1434
01:28:26,125 --> 01:28:27,375
Go! Pull back.
1435
01:28:34,208 --> 01:28:35,041
Mayday!
Mayday! Mayday!
1436
01:28:37,708 --> 01:28:40,375
- Pull!
- I'm trying.
1437
01:28:40,375 --> 01:28:42,083
Come on,
you're a tough babe.
You've got a tattoo.
1438
01:28:42,083 --> 01:28:44,417
Dad, it's just
a little tattoo.
1439
01:28:44,417 --> 01:28:45,708
Well, then,
be a little tough, then.
1440
01:28:46,625 --> 01:28:47,667
Hey, Guantanamo,
wake up!
1441
01:29:00,792 --> 01:29:05,083
Atta boy, boss.
You got the wind now!
1442
01:29:05,083 --> 01:29:07,583
Okay.
Okay.
1443
01:29:07,583 --> 01:29:09,291
All right,
go, go, go.
I got it.
1444
01:29:09,291 --> 01:29:10,250
Just hang on.
Yeah, I got it.
1445
01:29:17,750 --> 01:29:19,083
Okay, got it.
1446
01:29:19,083 --> 01:29:19,917
Got it?
Yeah!
1447
01:29:36,250 --> 01:29:37,458
Wow!
It's awesome, Dad.
1448
01:29:55,959 --> 01:29:56,792
Dad!
1449
01:30:05,375 --> 01:30:06,125
Maybe it's nobody.
1450
01:30:07,041 --> 01:30:07,792
Yeah, maybe.
1451
01:30:14,291 --> 01:30:17,208
Hey, come on, man.
We're doing our job out here.
You guys do yours.
1452
01:30:17,208 --> 01:30:18,083
These people
are taxpayers.
1453
01:30:35,542 --> 01:30:37,500
Oh, geez! Gunplay!
1454
01:30:42,834 --> 01:30:46,000
Let's go.
What are you, born stupid?
Stay down!
1455
01:30:46,000 --> 01:30:48,208
Stay calm.
They're not gonna shoot
at me and my family!
1456
01:30:48,208 --> 01:30:50,917
What are you doing?
1457
01:30:50,917 --> 01:30:54,291
You blew a hole in our boat
with this, and I'm gonna blow
a hole in their boat!
1458
01:30:54,291 --> 01:30:57,667
Fellas, this is a serious call
for help out here!
1459
01:30:57,667 --> 01:30:58,625
That's different.
We have dry rot.
1460
01:31:05,417 --> 01:31:07,792
Hey, there are children
on this boat!
1461
01:31:07,792 --> 01:31:10,083
We have had enough...
1462
01:31:10,083 --> 01:31:11,041
Whoa!
Mom's pissed!
1463
01:31:11,041 --> 01:31:12,041
...of you!
1464
01:31:16,083 --> 01:31:16,834
Huh?
Huh?
1465
01:31:19,083 --> 01:31:19,875
How much did you pay
for this thing?
1466
01:31:21,542 --> 01:31:24,291
Mom! Mom!
Over there!
1467
01:31:24,291 --> 01:31:26,583
Look! Look!
1468
01:31:26,583 --> 01:31:29,458
What's that?
That's the U.S. Coast Guard!
1469
01:31:32,208 --> 01:31:35,333
We're the Harvey family.
We're from Chicago.
1470
01:31:43,667 --> 01:31:45,542
I'll try to get them
on the radio before
they start shooting at us.
1471
01:31:45,542 --> 01:31:47,250
We're Americans!
1472
01:31:48,792 --> 01:31:51,667
All right, Coast Guard!
Kick ass!
1473
01:31:54,083 --> 01:31:54,917
Hey!
1474
01:31:58,083 --> 01:32:01,667
Uh, leg feels
a lot better now, boss.
1475
01:32:01,667 --> 01:32:04,125
Yeah, I've always
been a fast healer.
1476
01:32:04,125 --> 01:32:07,083
You know. Of course,
I believe in Jesus,
so that helps.
1477
01:32:07,083 --> 01:32:09,458
U.S. Coast Guard cutter
Daniel Peerman
1478
01:32:09,458 --> 01:32:11,583
calling 60-foot catch
off Los Palominos Island.
1479
01:32:11,583 --> 01:32:12,291
Come in, please.
1480
01:32:14,500 --> 01:32:16,375
This is the Wanderer.
Go ahead.
1481
01:32:16,375 --> 01:32:18,542
Commander L. W. Morgan
sends his greetings, sir.
1482
01:32:18,542 --> 01:32:19,917
May we speak with
the Captain, please?
1483
01:32:23,834 --> 01:32:25,250
May we speak with
the Captain, please?
Over.
1484
01:32:26,667 --> 01:32:27,542
That's you, boss.
1485
01:32:29,166 --> 01:32:30,083
You're the captain now.
1486
01:32:49,792 --> 01:32:52,625
Day 30, new log,
1487
01:32:52,625 --> 01:32:55,125
old log having fallen
into the hands of the
pirates of the Caribbean.
1488
01:32:58,583 --> 01:33:00,083
We said goodbye
to Captain Ron today.
1489
01:33:01,792 --> 01:33:04,792
He hadn't been
in the States for seven years.
1490
01:33:04,792 --> 01:33:06,000
Something about
the statute of limitations.
1491
01:33:07,125 --> 01:33:08,083
I didn't ask questions.
1492
01:33:12,000 --> 01:33:14,667
He kept his promise
to Ben, promoting him
from swab to mate.
1493
01:33:14,667 --> 01:33:16,458
You're a mate now.
Bye, Captain Ron.
1494
01:33:21,458 --> 01:33:23,125
He traded hair-grooming tips
with Caroline.
1495
01:33:28,291 --> 01:33:29,750
We're gonna miss you.
1496
01:33:29,750 --> 01:33:33,500
And he kissed Katherine.
In fact, I think
he French-kissed her.
1497
01:33:36,000 --> 01:33:36,834
You're a lucky man,
boss.
1498
01:33:46,875 --> 01:33:49,875
Then, as suddenly
and as mysteriously as
he'd come into our lives...
1499
01:33:51,041 --> 01:33:51,875
Captain Ron!
1500
01:33:56,000 --> 01:33:56,708
...he was gone,
1501
01:33:58,208 --> 01:33:59,333
and our adventure
was over.
1502
01:34:11,959 --> 01:34:12,708
Come here.
1503
01:34:14,667 --> 01:34:17,041
Got that Harvey boat
coming in a few minutes.
1504
01:34:17,041 --> 01:34:19,708
As soon as we sign
the papers, I wanna
pull it outta the water.
1505
01:34:19,708 --> 01:34:22,333
You want it surveyed?
Nah,
it's a piece of junk.
1506
01:34:22,333 --> 01:34:24,166
It's been stripped.
The engine's had it.
1507
01:34:24,166 --> 01:34:25,375
In fact, set her down
back there,
1508
01:34:25,375 --> 01:34:26,583
and we'll cut her up
for scrap next week.
1509
01:34:26,583 --> 01:34:28,083
Salvage what we can.
1510
01:34:28,083 --> 01:34:29,708
Got it? Good.
Patti, let's go.
1511
01:34:38,125 --> 01:34:40,583
Just think, guys.
Tomorrow at this time,
we're gonna be home.
1512
01:35:18,375 --> 01:35:19,166
Yes.
1513
01:35:22,792 --> 01:35:26,959
Well, the way I look at it,
we can do one of two things.
1514
01:35:26,959 --> 01:35:29,000
Sell the boat,
go back to Chicago,
get back in our old routine,
1515
01:35:29,917 --> 01:35:30,792
or don't!
1516
01:35:38,583 --> 01:35:40,708
Okay, coming about!
1517
01:35:40,708 --> 01:35:41,875
Good going!
1518
01:35:46,667 --> 01:35:48,792
Hey! Hey!
1519
01:35:50,917 --> 01:35:53,166
Where you going?
1520
01:35:53,166 --> 01:35:55,125
Outta the way.
Here comes the Harvey family!
1521
01:35:56,166 --> 01:35:58,625
Hey, over here!
1522
01:35:59,625 --> 01:36:00,959
Hey, where we going?
1523
01:36:02,834 --> 01:36:03,542
Where we going,
skipper?
1524
01:36:04,834 --> 01:36:05,667
I don't know.
1525
01:36:08,834 --> 01:36:10,500
But if we get lost,
1526
01:36:10,500 --> 01:36:13,333
we'll just pull in somewheres
and ask directions.
1527
01:36:20,708 --> 01:36:22,708
Oh, boy.
1528
01:36:22,708 --> 01:36:23,917
Look at that,
Barbara.
1529
01:36:27,333 --> 01:36:28,333
You think we'll ever
be able to do that?
1530
01:36:29,291 --> 01:36:31,166
Yeah, sure you will,
boss.
1531
01:36:31,166 --> 01:36:33,959
I guarantee it.
1532
01:36:33,959 --> 01:36:36,041
All right, Babs,
let's light the fires
and kick the tires, huh?
1533
01:36:36,041 --> 01:36:38,208
Uh, hey.
Push that back.
1534
01:36:38,208 --> 01:36:41,208
Hang on a second.
1535
01:36:41,208 --> 01:36:44,208
Whoa!
Looks like you forgot
to cast off there, boss.
1536
01:36:44,208 --> 01:36:46,250
That's okay.
It could happen to anybody.
1537
01:36:46,250 --> 01:36:49,667
Listen, we just thought
we'd check the boat out
today, you know.
1538
01:36:49,667 --> 01:36:52,166
You know, 'cause we
just got it yesterday.
Ah, don't worry.
1539
01:36:52,166 --> 01:36:54,542
Best thing to do
is get her out
on the ocean, boss.
1540
01:36:54,542 --> 01:36:56,458
Anything that's gonna happen
is gonna happen out there,
right, Babs?
1541
01:36:56,458 --> 01:36:59,458
Yeah. Yeah, listen.
Whoa!
Whoa.
1542
01:36:59,458 --> 01:37:01,708
Yeah, well, just
take it easy 'cause there's
a lot of boats out there!
1543
01:37:01,708 --> 01:37:04,083
Ah, don't worry about it.
They'll get out of our way,
believe me.
1544
01:37:04,083 --> 01:37:06,375
I learned that
driving the Saratoga.
116154
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