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♪♪
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My nose is made out of soap.
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♪♪
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[ Goat bleats ]
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♪♪
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Frommmmm the Big Apple,
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it's "Late Night Good Morning
with Uncle Grandpa"!
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Huh-ah!
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Tonight...!
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And a performance by...
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Plus...
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And me!
I'm Belly Bag!
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And, now, here's a guy
who still hasn't figured out
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how to put on a pair of pants...
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Unnnnncle
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Grandpaaaaaaa!
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♪♪
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[ Cheers and applause ]
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Hiya, folks.
Welcome to the show.
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So, this is an exciting week.
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The circus is in town.
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Everybody's excited
about the circus.
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Yeah, even the elephants.
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So, uh, how do you stop a circus
elephant from charging?
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You take away her credit card.
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[ Laughter and applause ]
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Gotta love the circus.
Gotta love it.
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My favorite thing about the
circus is the human cannonball.
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You folks familiar
with the human cannonball?
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-Yeah. [applauding]
-Yeah.
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Well, unfortunately,
you won't see him
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at the circus this year.
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Yeah. Sad story.
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He got fired.
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[Laughter]
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Boom!
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And, hey, how about
those circus clowns?
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You folks like circus clowns?
[Applause]
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[ Cheering ]
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Yeah, well, this is kind of
a sad story.
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The other day, a circus lion
ate a bunch of circus clowns.
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[ Grumbling ]
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Yeah, this is true.
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The worst part was the lion
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didn't even finish eating 'em.
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Yeah, when asked why not,
the lion said
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they tasted funny.
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-[Laughter]
-[Growling]
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Folks, it's time to say hello
to Mr. Gus & the Jurassic Jam!
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[Cheers and applause]
♪♪
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[ Playing soft jazz ]
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[Slurps]
[Outro plays]
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I've said it a million times:
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we've got the best all-dinosaur
band in late night.
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[Applause]
Ahhhhhhh!
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Mr. Gus, go ahead and tell us
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about your special
guest tonight.
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Well, you know him from the
legendary punk rock band
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the Ramones!
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Ladies and gentleman,
we're super lucky to have
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Marky Ramone sitting in
on drums all night!
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[ Cheers and applause ]
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It's great to be here
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on the "Uncle Grandpa"
program.
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Great to have ya, Marky,
but there's only one problem
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with you sittin' in
with an all-dinosaur band.
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You're not exactly a dinosaur.
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That's what you think.
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[ Chuckling ]
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Aah!!
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'Kay, fair enough.
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Hey, do you folks enjoy
delicious tacos?
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All: Whoo!
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'Cause it's taco-machine time!
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[ Cheering and shouting ]
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My friends in the space program
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went all out
when they built this thing.
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It's taco-riffic!
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[ Laughter ]
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[ Alarm blares ]
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Time to make the tacos!
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[ Panting ]
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[ Ding! ]
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[ Whirring ]
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[ Cheers and applause ]
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Here's your taco.
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Thanks!
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[ Panting ]
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Mum-mum-mum. [ Gulps ]
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[ Ding!]
Mucho bueno!
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[ Laughter ]
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By the way, you folks
in the audience are in luck,
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'cause we've got tacos
for everybody!
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[Horn blares]
-Ohh!
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[Bell dings]
[ Muffled cheering ]
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Hope you folks enjoy those.
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My first guest tonight
is the same first guest
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we have on every night.
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Ladies and gentlemen,
how about a nice, warm welcome
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for my greasy best friend
and hero,
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Pizza Steve!
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[ Cheers and applause ]
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Welcome back, Pizza Steve.
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Thanks Uncle, G.
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It's good to be here.
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So, what's new, little buddy?
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Oh, you know, the uzh:
hangin' with the president,
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00:04:13,015 --> 00:04:16,005
dating America's
top supermodels,
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00:04:16,015 --> 00:04:18,015
interstellar space travel.
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[Laughter]
-Oh, that's cute.
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Oh, man! Awesome!
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[ Slurps ]
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Hey, speaking of awesome,
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remember that awesome
video segment we made?
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Yeah. That was
pretty awesome.
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So, uh, over the weekend,
me and Pizza Steve here
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made an awesome video together.
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-[Laughter, oohs]
-Yeah.
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We had a really awesome idea,
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so we got a camera crew
and we filmed it.
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You guys want to watch it?
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Audience: Yeah!
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R-R-R-Roll it, Frankenstein!
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Rawr!
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[ Whoosh]
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[ Pitter!]
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Mmm!
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[Air horn blares]
Aaaaah!
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[ Laughter ]
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Oh, classic.
[Laughter]
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Comedy gold.
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00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:02,019
[ Growls ]
133
00:05:02,017 --> 00:05:05,017
Hey, by the way,
the studio audience is in luck,
134
00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:09,021
'cause we've got banana
cream pies for everybody!
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[Ding!]
Audience: Ooh!
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Hey, I think we should watch
the air-horn video again.
137
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What do you think, Pizza Steve?
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-[Squawking]
-Huh?
139
00:05:18,014 --> 00:05:20,014
[ Squawking ]
140
00:05:20,009 --> 00:05:21,019
Commercial break?
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00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:23,010
[ Squawking ]
142
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Uggghhh! Do we have to?
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[ Squawking ]
144
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All right.
145
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[dully] We'll be back
after this brief message
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from our sponsor.
[Cheers and applause]
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[ Band plays soft jazz ]
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[ Indistinct chatter ]
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[Valley accent] Stacey,
can this party be
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00:05:39,013 --> 00:05:41,013
any lamer?
-I know, right?
151
00:05:41,013 --> 00:05:44,003
Bananas are like
so five minutes ago.
152
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[ Rumbling ]
153
00:05:45,014 --> 00:05:47,014
Boo, yeah! It's time...!
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-Huh?
-What?
155
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[dramatically]
...to taste the tange.
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00:05:51,011 --> 00:05:54,011
[Squish]
[Rock music plays]
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[ Shimmer!]
♪ T-T-T-T-Tangerines ♪
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00:05:56,021 --> 00:05:58,011
♪ Do you know what I mean? ♪
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00:05:58,013 --> 00:05:59,023
Tangerines?
160
00:05:59,020 --> 00:06:01,020
♪ T-T-Tangerines ♪
161
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:03,020
They look like
tiny oranges.
162
00:06:03,018 --> 00:06:05,018
♪ But they're tangerines ♪
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00:06:05,020 --> 00:06:07,020
When you're lookin' for a tangy,
orange citrus fruit
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that isn't an orange,
reach for tangerines!
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00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:12,020
[ Shimmer!]
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00:06:12,022 --> 00:06:14,022
♪ Tan-ge-rines! ♪
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Taste the Tange!
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00:06:15,018 --> 00:06:17,008
[ Announcer speaking rapidly ]
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00:06:17,014 --> 00:06:20,004
[ Band plays soft jazz ]
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[Cheers and applause]
Welcome back, folks.
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It's time now for a little
segment we like to call
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Will it Break?
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Take it away, Mr. Gus.
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♪ Will it break? ♪
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♪ Will it break? ♪
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♪ Will it break? ♪
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00:06:33,007 --> 00:06:35,007
♪ Will it bre-e-ak? ♪
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[laughs] Yeah!
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Okay, here's how this works:
We put a special item onstage
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then we drop a giant anvil on
it, and see if it breaks.
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00:06:45,002 --> 00:06:46,022
[Cheers and applause]
-Oh, wow, yeah!
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[Laughter]
Okay, Belly Bag, tell us
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what tonight's special item is.
184
00:06:50,013 --> 00:06:53,003
Tonight's
special item is...
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00:06:53,004 --> 00:06:57,024
Mr. Gus's antique
china collection!
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Say what?
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Okay, what do you think,
Pizza Steve, will it break?
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I'm gonna go with...
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00:07:03,004 --> 00:07:05,014
sh-yeah!
190
00:07:05,015 --> 00:07:06,015
Just a second now --
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00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:08,020
Okay, Pizza Steve
says it'll break.
192
00:07:08,017 --> 00:07:09,997
Marky Ramone,
what do you think?
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00:07:10,005 --> 00:07:12,005
Oh, yeah.
That'll definitely break.
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00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:14,004
Okay, I'm with you fellas.
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I say it breaks, too.
196
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Uncle Grandpa!
197
00:07:16,019 --> 00:07:18,999
Okay, let's go ahead
and drop the anvil.
198
00:07:19,003 --> 00:07:20,003
Are you for real?!
199
00:07:20,004 --> 00:07:21,014
[ Smash! ]
200
00:07:21,007 --> 00:07:22,007
[ Cheers and applause ]
201
00:07:22,014 --> 00:07:25,004
Wel...p, it broke!
202
00:07:25,003 --> 00:07:27,013
Of course it broke!
It's delicate china!
203
00:07:27,009 --> 00:07:29,019
Yeah, hey, we gotta
move on now, Mr. Gus.
204
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[crying] These
Gus Family heirlooms
205
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are irreplaceable, man!
206
00:07:33,009 --> 00:07:36,009
Oh. Well, if it'll make you
feel any better,
207
00:07:36,015 --> 00:07:38,005
we'll just edit
that segment out.
208
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Frankenstein?
209
00:07:39,012 --> 00:07:40,022
Rawr! Rrr!
210
00:07:40,022 --> 00:07:42,022
Problem solved.
211
00:07:42,022 --> 00:07:44,002
[ Slurps ]
212
00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:45,005
So, Pizza Steve, did you catch
213
00:07:45,016 --> 00:07:46,016
the sports game last night?
214
00:07:46,020 --> 00:07:48,010
[ Squawking ]
215
00:07:48,007 --> 00:07:50,007
[sighs]
Flippin' frog legs.
216
00:07:50,014 --> 00:07:52,004
[ Squawking ]
217
00:07:52,004 --> 00:07:53,024
Another commercial?!
218
00:07:54,001 --> 00:07:56,001
-[Squawks]
-Okay, fine.
219
00:07:56,002 --> 00:07:57,012
We'll be right back.
220
00:07:57,011 --> 00:07:59,011
[Band plays soft jazz]
[Cheers and applause]
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00:07:59,010 --> 00:08:01,010
[Piano plays romantic tune]
Woman: After all those years,
222
00:08:01,016 --> 00:08:03,006
you've finally found the one,
223
00:08:03,012 --> 00:08:04,022
the love of your life,
224
00:08:04,017 --> 00:08:05,997
your soulmate.
225
00:08:06,004 --> 00:08:09,014
Show her how much you love her
with the gift of...
226
00:08:09,012 --> 00:08:10,022
tangerines.
227
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,000
[ Laughs ]
228
00:08:12,003 --> 00:08:13,023
[whispering]
Tangerines.
229
00:08:13,023 --> 00:08:15,023
[ Announcer speaking rapidly ]
230
00:08:15,021 --> 00:08:18,021
[Band plays soft jazz]
[Whistling and applause]
231
00:08:18,020 --> 00:08:20,020
[laughs]
Hurry up, Pizza Steve.
232
00:08:20,021 --> 00:08:23,021
We're back.
Um... my next guest
233
00:08:23,017 --> 00:08:26,997
is a popular staple in
delicatessens around the world.
234
00:08:27,003 --> 00:08:29,013
And also my favorite kind
of sandwich.
235
00:08:29,011 --> 00:08:32,001
Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome
236
00:08:32,003 --> 00:08:33,023
Baloney Sandwich.
237
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,020
[ Cheers, laughter,
and applause ]
238
00:08:36,017 --> 00:08:38,007
Hey, have a seat.
239
00:08:38,016 --> 00:08:39,016
[ Fart]
240
00:08:39,022 --> 00:08:43,012
[Laughter]
-Ohh, you guys!
241
00:08:43,007 --> 00:08:44,017
Ah, yeah!
242
00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:47,013
Anyways, thanks
for coming on the show.
243
00:08:47,015 --> 00:08:48,005
Thanks for having me.
244
00:08:48,011 --> 00:08:49,021
Oh, hey, by the way,
245
00:08:49,018 --> 00:08:51,018
there's complimentary
whoopee cushions
246
00:08:51,021 --> 00:08:54,001
under every seat
in the audience tonight.
247
00:08:54,003 --> 00:08:57,013
[Muffled cheering]
[ Farting]
248
00:08:57,008 --> 00:08:59,018
So, what kind of mustard
are you into?
249
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:01,010
Well, let's just say
I'm a --
250
00:09:01,015 --> 00:09:03,005
a honey Dijon
kind of guy.
251
00:09:03,015 --> 00:09:07,005
Honey Dijon?!
Oh man! Me, too!
252
00:09:07,011 --> 00:09:10,021
Now, uh, is that
sourdough bread?
253
00:09:10,018 --> 00:09:11,018
Heck, yeah it is,
254
00:09:12,001 --> 00:09:14,011
fresh from San Francisco!
255
00:09:14,012 --> 00:09:15,022
Geez Louise!
256
00:09:15,019 --> 00:09:17,009
That's the best kind!
257
00:09:17,011 --> 00:09:19,001
What else you got
on ya?
258
00:09:19,005 --> 00:09:21,995
Any pickle slices
under your baloney?
259
00:09:22,006 --> 00:09:23,996
Yep -- Don't leave home
without 'em!
260
00:09:24,005 --> 00:09:26,995
Mm. Okay, this card says
you're here
261
00:09:27,004 --> 00:09:28,014
to promote
your new TV show.
262
00:09:28,015 --> 00:09:31,005
Yeah. I'm doing
a new family sitcom
263
00:09:31,013 --> 00:09:32,023
called "The Baloneys."
264
00:09:32,022 --> 00:09:34,012
I play a single dad,
trying to raise
265
00:09:34,016 --> 00:09:35,996
six out-of-control kids
266
00:09:36,002 --> 00:09:38,002
who are also
baloney sandwiches.
267
00:09:38,002 --> 00:09:40,002
Mmm. [smacks lips]
268
00:09:40,003 --> 00:09:41,023
Okay, let's show a clip.
269
00:09:41,023 --> 00:09:43,013
[Canned laughter]
No daughter of mine
270
00:09:43,015 --> 00:09:46,015
is leaving the house
dressed like that!
271
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,020
What?! But, Daddy!
272
00:09:48,022 --> 00:09:50,002
No buts!
273
00:09:50,003 --> 00:09:51,023
Your whole lettuce
is hanging out!
274
00:09:52,001 --> 00:09:54,011
Daaad!
Lawrence bit me!
275
00:09:54,012 --> 00:09:55,022
[ Groans ]
276
00:09:56,001 --> 00:09:57,011
Why can't you kids be
more like
277
00:09:57,009 --> 00:09:58,019
the Salamis next door?
278
00:09:58,022 --> 00:10:00,012
[ Laughter ]
279
00:10:00,012 --> 00:10:03,022
[Cheers and applause]
-Mmm, mmm!
280
00:10:03,023 --> 00:10:04,023
[ Gulps ]
281
00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:05,021
"The Baloneys" premieres
282
00:10:05,023 --> 00:10:06,023
Wednesday night at 8:00
283
00:10:06,020 --> 00:10:08,000
on another network.
284
00:10:08,005 --> 00:10:09,015
All right,
let's bring out the band!
285
00:10:09,023 --> 00:10:12,013
Marky Ramone, you're gonna
love these guys.
286
00:10:12,012 --> 00:10:13,022
I'm very excited.
287
00:10:13,022 --> 00:10:16,022
Our next guest is a popular
rock 'n' roll band.
288
00:10:16,020 --> 00:10:18,000
They're here to perform a song
289
00:10:18,003 --> 00:10:20,023
from their brand-new album,
"RAWR."
290
00:10:20,017 --> 00:10:22,017
Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome
291
00:10:23,001 --> 00:10:25,011
Giant Realistic
Flying Rock Band!
292
00:10:25,016 --> 00:10:27,006
[Cheers and applause]
-Yeah!
293
00:10:27,007 --> 00:10:30,017
[ Rock music plays ]
294
00:10:37,007 --> 00:10:39,007
[ Roars ]
295
00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:43,020
♪♪
296
00:10:43,021 --> 00:10:46,021
[ Cracking ]
297
00:10:46,020 --> 00:10:48,020
[ Roars ]
298
00:10:48,017 --> 00:10:50,017
[ Rumble, roars ]
299
00:10:50,023 --> 00:10:51,023
[ Rumbling ]
300
00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:54,010
Uh-oh!
-[Roaring]
301
00:10:54,016 --> 00:10:57,996
[ Clatter ]
302
00:10:58,002 --> 00:10:59,022
Talk about bringing down
the house.
303
00:11:00,001 --> 00:11:01,011
Good night, everybody!
304
00:11:01,016 --> 00:11:04,016
♪♪
305
00:11:11,019 --> 00:11:13,999
♪♪
306
00:11:14,002 --> 00:11:16,022
That was quite delicious.
307
00:11:16,019 --> 00:11:18,019
♪♪
20411
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