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[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: GOOD MORNING!
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GOOD MORNING.
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GOOD MORNING.
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>> GRFT: [ ROARS ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: GOOD MORNING.
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GOOD MORNING!
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[
MID-TEMPO SYNTHESIZER MUSIC
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PLAYS]
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>>
SO, JIM, YOU CAN EITHER PICK
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ONE OF THESE LOVELY LADIES, OR,
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FOR THE 20th CONSECUTIVE
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EPISODE, STICK WITH THE CACTUS.
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WE'LL FIND OUT AFTER THE BREAK!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: [ YAWNS ]
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SLOUCHING ON THE COUCH!
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[ STOMACH RUMBLES ]
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UH-OH!
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I GOT TO EAT!
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BUT I GOT TO BE QUICK!
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HYAH!
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TO THE MICROWAVE!
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HMM.
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HMM.
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BETTER GO WITH 15.
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I CAN'T MISS THE END OF
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"LOVE OR CACTUS."
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DING-DONG!
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GOOD MORNIN'!
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[ CHOMP! ]
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[ SHATTER! ]
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A MESS LIKE THIS BELONGS IN THE
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TRASH.
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>> [ HACKING ]
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UGH! THE STENCH!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: HMPH!
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AWW, YEAH!
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[ ZIP! ]
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[ TING! ]
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[ RUMBLE! RUMBLE! ]
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>>
WE NOW RETURN TO
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"LOVE OR CACTUS."
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[ RUMBLE! RUMBLE! RUMBLE! ]
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>> Mr. Gus: UH, UNCLE GRANDPA,
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IT'S YOUR TURN TO TAKE OUT THE
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TRASH.
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>> Uncle Grandpa: DON'T WORRY,
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MR. GUS.
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I'LL DO IT AFTER JIM MAKES HIS
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FINAL DECISION.
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>> Mr. Gus: UH-HUH.
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>> Pizza Steve: UH, EXCUSE ME.
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WHERE'S YOUR HAT, BRO?
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>> Mr. Gus: [ SIGHS ]
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>> Pizza Steve: UGH.
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YOU WOULD WEAR THAT.
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>>
SO, JIM, WHAT IS YOUR FINAL
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DECI--
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>>
I'M GONNA STICK WITH CACTY!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: WHA-A-A-A-T?!
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I KNEW IT.
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[ RUMBLE! RUMBLE! RUMBLE! ]
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UH-OH. TRASH.
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WHOA!
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WHA-AH-AH! OHH!
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EW! IT'S GARBAGE!
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>> Pizza Steve: AAAAAAAH!
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>> Belly Bag: HELP US,
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UNCLE GRANDPA!
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>> Pizza Steve: WE'RE BEING
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PULLED UNDER!
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>> Mr. Gus: I TOLD YOU TO TAKE
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OUT THE TRA--
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>> Pizza Steve: I'M TOO HANDSOME
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TO DIE!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: DON'T WORRY,
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GUYS -- I'LL SAVE YOU!
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GEESH!
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HOW LONG WAS I-I-I-I-I-I-I OUT?
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MR. GOOSE?!
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PRETTY STEVE?!
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WHERE THE DONG-DIDDLE DID
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EVERYBUN GO?
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ARE YOU MR. GOOSE?
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>> [ VOMITS ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: HA HA!
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TELL ME ABOUT IT.
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[ POINK! CREAK! ]
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SHHHHH!
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DO YOU HEAR THAT, BILLY?
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>> [ In distance ] HELP US,
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UNCLE GRANDPA!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: BOOGIE BOARD!
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I'M COMIN' FOR YA, FRIENDS!
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[ BREATHING HEAVILY ]
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[ GASPS ]
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WHOA! HOLY BANANAS!
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A BANANA-PEEL MINEFIELD!
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ONE FALSE STEP AND I COULD FALL
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ON MY RUMP.
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[ CRUNCH! ZIP! ]
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GO-O-O-O-O-O-OFS!
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PHEW!
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[ ZIP! ]
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[ WHIP! ZIP! ]
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YAH-YAH-YAH!
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UGH! UGH! UGH! UGH!
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[ CRASH! ]
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PBHT!
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TECHNICALLY, I DIDN'T FALL ON MY
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RUMP.
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[ Italian accent ] UNKEE JAMPA,
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1, BANANAS, A-ZERO!
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OOF!
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WHAT WAS I SAYING?
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OH, YEAH!
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BANANAS ARE ACTUALLY A TYPE OF
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BERRY.
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NOW TO SAVE MY FRI-I-I-ENDS!
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[ WHIP! ]
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YOU GET USED TO THIS LIFESTYLE.
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[ WHIP! ]
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HMM.
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SOME KIND OF JUNK-MAIL
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RAINFOREST, I GUESS.
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I'LL JUST HAVE TO WALK THROUGH
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IT, OF COURSE.
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NOTHING OF INTEREST.
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WHA?! HUH?!
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[ GASPS ]
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TOOTY-FIVE PERSMENT!
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HOGIES!
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WHAT A FIND!
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OH-WHEE!
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ONE-OF-A-KIND FIND.
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OH, YES.
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[ GASPS ]
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OH, THAT LOOKS LIKE A BARGAIN.
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[ CREAK! POP! ]
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[ LAUGHS MANIACALLY ]
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SO MANY DEALS!
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AAAAH!
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AAAAAH!
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[ GRUNTING ]
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[ POP! ]
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[ KA-CHING! ]
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MUST RESIST!
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HAVE TO SAVE BUDDIES!
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[ POP! KA-CHING! ]
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GROOH!
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GRAH GREE BIT GRABBY GORE!
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HOOOOOOOOOOF! HOO! HAH!
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[ CREAK! POP! ]
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YA-A-A-A-A-A-A-H!
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[ WHOOSH! ]
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[ WHIP! POP! CREAK! ]
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I'LL NEVER GROW OLD, AND I'LL
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NEVER DIE.
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[ ALL BREATHING HEAVILY ]
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[ Echoing ] PIZZA STARVE?!
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DR. FEELGOOSE?!
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HMM. NOBODY HERE, I GUESS.
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[ SIZZLE! ]
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OWW.
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>> HEY, YOU! HEY!
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>> HEY!
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>> HEY!
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>> YOU'RE UNCLE GRANDPA!
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>> YOU'VE GOT A LOT OF NERVE
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COMING TO THE LAND OF LEFTOVERS!
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>> Together: YOU DIDN'T WANT US!
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GOBBLE, GOBBLE!
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ONE OF US!
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YOU DIDN'T WANT US!
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YOU DIDN'T WA-- HEY!
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>> HE'S GETTING AWAY!
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LET'S GET HIM!
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[ ALL SHOUTING ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: I THINK I'M
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LOSING 'EM.
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DOINK!
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>> THERE HE IS!
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>> HEY!
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>> HEY! HEY!
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>> LET'S COOK HIM AND EAT HIM!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: [ CHUCKLES
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NERVOUSLY ]
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HOW'S ABOUT I, UH --
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HOW ABOUT I EAT YOU ALL NOW?
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>> HEY!
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>> [ LAUGHS ]
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>> YEAH! YEAH!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: GREAT!
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WELL, THEN, LET'S GET COOKING.
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HERE YOU GO, LITTLE LEFTOVER
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PERSON.
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>> YIPPEE!
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>> YAY! HE DOES WANT TO EAT US!
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>> HA HA! WE ARE FOOD!
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>> LEFTOVER PARTY!
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GUYS, WE'RE FINALLY GOIN' HOME!
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[ ALL CHEER ]
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[ BLAM! ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: HMM.
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LET'S SEE HERE.
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WHOOPSY!
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[ WHISTLING OFF-KEY ]
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[ ZAP! ZAP! ZAP! ZAP! ]
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UHH! OOF!
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UH-OH.
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[ ZAP! ZAP! ]
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[ CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAK! ]
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>> [ ROARS ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: [ MUNCHING ]
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JUST LIKE MAMA GRANDPA USED TO
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MAKE.
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GOOD JOB!
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>> [ ROARS ]
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[ GRUNTING ]
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[ VOMITS ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: MY BUDDIES!
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>> Pizza Steve: UGH!
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UNCLE G, YOU GOT TO TAKE THE
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TRASH OUT BEFORE IT TAKES US
225
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OUT!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: I GOT AN IDEA!
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[ DING! ]
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>> I'M A LIGHT BULB!
229
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>> [ GROWLS ]
230
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>> Uncle Grandpa: SO, UH, HEY,
231
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TRASH MONSTER, SO, I WAS
232
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THINKIN', I'D REALLY LIKE TO
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TAKE YOU OUT...
234
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>> [ ROARS ]
235
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>> Uncle Grandpa: ...ON A DATE.
236
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>> OOH!
237
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[ GIGGLES ]
238
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[ BOTH SLURPING ]
239
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[ BICYCLE BELL DINGING ]
240
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[ BOTH LAUGHING ]
241
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>> YEAH. SO, UH, THAT'S HOW MEN
242
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AND WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT?
243
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[ MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING ]
244
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>> Uncle Grandpa: ♪ YAR LAR LAR
245
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FAR LAR LAR LAR LAR LAR! ♪
246
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[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]
247
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>> [ LIPS SMACKING ]
248
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>> Uncle Grandpa: NOW!
249
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[ TIRES SCREECH ]
250
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GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!
251
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[ TIRES SCREECH ]
252
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AND THAT'S HOW YOU TAKE OUT THE
253
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TRASH!
254
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>> [ CRYING ]
255
00:08:16,008 --> 00:08:17,018
>> OHH.
256
00:08:17,017 --> 00:08:19,997
SUCH RAW BEAUTY.
257
00:08:20,004 --> 00:08:22,004
>> [ CRYING CONTINUES ]
258
00:08:22,003 --> 00:08:27,013
[ SLOOP! SLOOP! SLOOP! SLOOP! ]
259
00:08:27,011 --> 00:08:28,021
>> [ GASPS ]
260
00:08:29,001 --> 00:08:31,001
>> I CHOOSE LOVE!
261
00:08:31,005 --> 00:08:33,015
>> [ GASPS ]
262
00:08:33,021 --> 00:08:35,011
[ CREEEEEAK! TING! ]
263
00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:36,015
AAAAAAH.
264
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:37,020
[ HEARTBEAT ]
265
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:41,020
[ ZIP! POP! ]
266
00:08:42,001 --> 00:08:43,021
>> GRFT: [ FARTS ]
267
00:08:43,022 --> 00:08:44,012
[ WHOOSH! ]
268
00:08:44,014 --> 00:08:45,024
>> Mr. Gus: DOES HE SEE US?
269
00:08:45,021 --> 00:08:47,001
>> Pizza Steve: I DON'T KNOW.
270
00:08:47,006 --> 00:08:49,006
>> Uncle Grandpa: BOOOOOO!
271
00:08:49,010 --> 00:08:51,010
BOOOOOOOOOOO!
272
00:08:51,014 --> 00:08:52,024
[ RATTLE! RATTLE! RATTLE! ]
273
00:08:53,001 --> 00:08:55,001
BOOOOOO! BOOOOOO!
274
00:08:55,004 --> 00:08:56,004
>> Pizza Steve: NO, NO, NO!
275
00:08:56,004 --> 00:08:57,014
>> Uncle Grandpa: BOOOOOOO!
276
00:08:57,014 --> 00:08:59,024
GOOD MORNING!
277
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:09,010
UH, MY PERFECT WOMAN HAS TO BE A
278
00:09:09,016 --> 00:09:10,016
NON-SNORER.
279
00:09:10,019 --> 00:09:13,009
SHE HAS TO ENJOY THE COMPANY OF
280
00:09:13,009 --> 00:09:15,019
BEES, AND SHE MUST BE IMMUNE TO
281
00:09:15,022 --> 00:09:20,002
ALL TYPES OF POISON.
282
00:09:20,006 --> 00:09:24,016
[ SLOOP! SLOOP! SLOOP! ]
283
00:09:24,017 --> 00:09:27,007
IF WOMEN WERE CATS, I'D BE A
284
00:09:27,014 --> 00:09:29,014
REAL LADIES' MAN.
285
00:09:29,012 --> 00:09:32,012
[ CATS MEOWING ]
286
00:09:32,010 --> 00:09:35,010
[ WHIP! ]
287
00:09:35,013 --> 00:09:38,003
>> Mr. Gus: I AM SO ALONE!
288
00:09:38,004 --> 00:09:40,004
NO. NO! PLEASE DON'T --
289
00:09:40,002 --> 00:09:42,012
DON'T WIPE TO THE NEXT -- ARGH!
290
00:09:42,007 --> 00:09:44,017
>> Pizza Steve: YO, LADIES.
291
00:09:44,019 --> 00:09:46,999
IT'S PIZZA STEVE, OR, AS MY
292
00:09:47,006 --> 00:09:49,016
FRIENDS CALL ME, "SUPER SLICE,"
293
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,020
"MR. TOP SLICE SUPREME,"
294
00:09:52,001 --> 00:09:53,011
"KING THICKCRUST,"
295
00:09:53,016 --> 00:09:56,006
"EL GRANDE SLICE-IO."
296
00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:58,012
BUT YOU CAN JUST CALL ME
297
00:09:58,011 --> 00:10:00,021
"THE COOLEST PEPPERONI-ENCRUSTED
298
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:04,000
DUDE YOU WILL EVER MEET."
299
00:10:04,005 --> 00:10:05,015
>> Belly Bag: HI!
300
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,010
I LOVE LADIES!
301
00:10:07,013 --> 00:10:09,003
AND I'M HAPPY TO SAY THAT,
302
00:10:09,006 --> 00:10:10,996
GENERALLY, WITH THE POSSIBLE
303
00:10:11,002 --> 00:10:12,022
EXCEPTION OF THE ONE LIVING IN
304
00:10:13,001 --> 00:10:14,021
CLEVELAND, THAT LADIES LOVE ME!
305
00:10:15,001 --> 00:10:17,011
AND WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE, REALLY?
306
00:10:17,014 --> 00:10:19,024
I GOT EVERYTHING A LADY NEEDS,
307
00:10:20,001 --> 00:10:23,011
LIKE DAY-OLD PRETZELS, SNAILS,
308
00:10:23,016 --> 00:10:26,006
AND A GENTLY USED CAR BATTERY.
309
00:10:26,014 --> 00:10:27,024
[ WHIP! ]
310
00:10:27,020 --> 00:10:29,020
>> GRFT: [ ROARS ]
311
00:10:29,019 --> 00:10:30,019
[ ROARS ]
312
00:10:30,022 --> 00:10:32,022
[ ROARS ]
313
00:10:32,019 --> 00:10:35,019
[ MEWS ]
314
00:10:35,017 --> 00:10:36,007
[ SLOOP! ]
315
00:10:36,016 --> 00:10:37,016
>> Uncle Grandpa: ARE YOU --
316
00:10:37,019 --> 00:10:41,019
[ BURPING ]
317
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:50,020
DO YOU LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
318
00:10:50,017 --> 00:10:51,997
>> PLEASE MAKE YOUR SELECTION.
319
00:10:52,006 --> 00:10:54,006
[ ZOOM! ]
320
00:10:54,016 --> 00:11:02,016
[ CRASH! ]
321
00:11:02,023 --> 00:11:04,013
[ WHIP! WHISTLE! ]
322
00:11:04,012 --> 00:11:05,022
[ CRASH! CRASH! CRASH! ]
323
00:11:06,001 --> 00:11:07,011
>> Uncle Grandpa: UGH!
324
00:11:07,011 --> 00:11:08,011
[ SHATTER! ]
325
00:11:08,010 --> 00:11:09,000
UH-OH.
326
00:11:09,006 --> 00:11:11,006
[ BOOM! ]
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