Original subtitles

[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ] GOOD MORNING!

GOOD MORNING.

GOOD MORNING.

[ ROARS ]

GOOD MORNING.

GOOD MORNING!

[ UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS ]

[ FLUTE PLAYS ]

[ Irish accent ] STOP RIGHT THERE! YOU GOT ANY GOLD?

YEAH, RIGHT! LET ME SEE THAT STUPID THING!

YOU'RE PROBABLY HIDING SOME GOLD IN HERE.

EMPTY! [ GRUMBLES ]

HERE, YOU DUMB LITTLE LIAR! NOW, GET LOST!

[ THWACK! ]

FIDDLE DEE TWIDDLES!

AT THIS RATE, I'LL NEVER FIND ME GOLD.

[ WHOOSH! ] HUH? WHERE'S THAT SOUND COMING FROM?

AGH! [ CRASH! ]

[ SCREAMING ]

TOP O' THE MORNIN', IRELAND!

AND HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY.

[ ROARS ]

YOU SAID IT, GIANT REALISTIC FLYING TIGER.

THIS SURE IS AN ACCURATE PORTRAYAL OF THIS COUNTRY.

BUT, UNCLE GRANDPA,

ISN'T IRELAND FULL OF L-L-L-LEPRECHAUNS?

PBHT! LEPRECHAUNS?! THIS GUY!

BELLY BAG, EVERYONE KNOWS LEPRECHAUNS ARE MAKE-BELIEVE.

WHY YOU STRESSIN', DAWG?

YOUR SHOULDERS ARE GONNA GET ALL TENSE.

BESIDES, IRELAND

IS WHERE MY GOOD FRIEND THE FOREST KING LIVES.

[ ROARS ]

HE'S MY OLD COLLEGE BUDDY.

WE BOTH MAJORED IN CHILD HELPING MAGIC,

BUT HE TOOK THE BUSINESS ROUTE.

HE'S MAKING LIKE SIX FIGURES A YEAR.

THE FOREST KING?

SOUNDS LIKE JUST THE FELLOW WHO HAS ME GOLD.

HEY, GET OUT OF HERE!

-BLECCH! [ SIZZLE! ]

[ GRUNTS ] WHOA! WHA-HA!

THE LAST THING ANY OF US NEED TO WORRY ABOUT

IS SOME DUMB FAIRY-TALE FREAK.

-[ GRUNTS ] -HUH?

I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD HELP ME FIND ME GOLD?

LEPRECHAUN!

WHOA!

THEY'RE REAL! THEY'RE REAL!

OF COURSE I'M REAL.

AND I JUST WANTED TO KNOW IF I --

[ SLAP! SLAP! ] WHAT THE?! STOP THAT!

I NEED YOU TO TAKE ME TO YOUR FOREST KING FRIEND AND --

[ SLAP! ] I SAID STOP DOING THA--

[ SLAP! ] ARE YOU CRAZY?!

STOP HITTING ME!

[ ROARS ]

QUICK, BELLY BAG, THE PEPPER SLIME!

-HERE! -NO, NO, NO!

GO!

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD -- OW!

JUST LISTEN TO ME FOR A SEC--

[ SLAP! ] LISTEN TO M--

[ SLAP! ] [ SCREAMS, GRUMBLES ]

IT'S STILL ALIVE!

[ ROARS ]

[ GASPS ]

[ GROWLS ]

[ MUTTERING ]

UH, DO YOU THINK WE WERE A LITTLE HARSH ON HIM?

NO. LEPRECHAUNS ARE NOT PURE OF HEART.

BESIDES, THEY DON'T HAVE ANY FEELINGS, ANYWAY.

[ SOBBING ]

I HATE THAT FELLA! WHAT'S WRONG WITH LEPRECHAUNS?

I BET IF I WERE A HUMAN CHILD, HE'D HAVE NO PROBLEM HELPING ME.

WAIT A SECOND! THAT'S IT!

[ LAUGHS ] I'LL DISGUISE MYSELF AS A LITTLE HUMAN BOY,

AND THEN HE'LL HAVE TO HELP ME.

TWEEDLE DEE TWIGGLES!

I'M ABOUT TO BE RICHER THAN ME WILDEST DREAMS!

SO I TOLD THE MAITRE D' IF HE DIDN'T BRING OUT THE MANAGER,

I'D NEVER GET OUT OF THIS ICE MACHINE.

HELLO THERE! MY NAME IS LITTLE BRADLEY!

I'M JUST A LITTLE OL' BOY WALKING THROUGH THE FOREST.

HELLO THERE, LITTLE BRADLEY! I'M YOUR UNCLE GRANDPA!

WHAT'S A CONVINCINGLY YOUNG IRISH BOY LIKE YOURSELF

DOING HERE?

YOU KNOW, THERE'S A FILTHY LITTLE LEPRECHAUN

IN THESE WOODS.

HE'S REALLY UGLY AND SMELLS LIKE CHLORINE.

PROBABLY NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND HIS ENTIRE LIFE.

BUT I SCARED HIM AWAY. HE RAN CRYING LIKE A LITTLE BABY.

HE'S PROBABLY OUT SOMEWHERE

GORGING HIMSELF ON TRASH FROM SOMEBODY'S GARBAGE CAN.

OKAY! I GET IT!

I MEAN...THANK YOU FOR THE WARNING, UNCLE GRANDPA.

NOW, I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD KINDLY HELP ME FIND ME GOLD?

GOLD? HMM. NEVER HEARD OF IT.

BUT I SURE LOVE HELPING KIDS!

SO THE ANSWER IS YES, I'LL HELP YA!

YAY! YOU'VE MADE THIS LITTLE BOY SO HAPPY! LET'S GO!

TIGER, BE A DOLL AND WATCH THE RV

WHILE I'M OFF HELPING THAT KID WITH A BEARD.

DON'T WORRY, YOUR UNCLE GRANDPA

IS GONNA FIND YOUR GOLD, LICKETY SPLIT!

IS THIS YOUR GOLD?

NO.

[ SNORING ]

[ WIGGLE! POP! ]

GOLD?

NO.

[ SIGHS ] TWIDDLE DEE DEE.

LOOK, UNCLE GRANDPA, THIS ISN'T ME GOLD.

LEMONS AREN'T ME GOLD.

ME GOLD IS A BIG PILE OF SHINY COINS --

THAT YOU CAN BUY THINGS WITH!

SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THAT AROUND?

OH! HA HA. DORP!

GOLD IS MONEY!

I KNOW WHO HAS LOTS O' MONEY! THE FOREST KING, OF COURSE!

AND I KNOW HIS SECRET RHYME.

FOREST KING, FOREST KING, SHOW ME WHERE YOU ARE!

FOLLOW ME, YOUNG BOYS!

I'LL LEAD YE TO THE FOREST KING!

[ HOWLING IN DISTANCE ]

THIS WAY, YOUNG MEN!

[ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]

LOOKS A LITTLE SPOOKY, FIDDLE DEE DEE.

AH, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, BRADLEY.

NOTHING CAN HURT YOU IN THE FOREST KING'S FOREST KINGDOM --

JUST AS LONG AS YOU'RE PURE OF HEART.

[ GULPS ]

HA! SEE? IRELAND ISN'T SO SCARY --

CERTAINLY NOT FOR US TWO PURE-HEARTED BOYS.

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY HARM US?

-[ STAMMERS ] -WHAT IS IT, BOY?

YOU THINK I LOOK HANDSOME? YOU THINK I'M CHARMING?

WITTY, DROLL, RAVISHING?

A MONSTER BITING YOU! CAN'T YOU FEEL THAT?!

NAH. I TOLD YOU, I'M PURE OF HEART!

HMM. YOU DON'T SCARE ME! I'M A PURE-HEARTED BO--

-[ CLUCKING, GOBBLING ] -AAGH!

[ CHUCKLES ] TICKLES, DOESN'T IT, SPORT?

HEY, WAIT FOR US!

[ CREAK! ]

[ WATER SPLASHES ]

WHEE!

HEY, BRADLEY, CHECK IT OUT!

I'M A FISHERMAN!

NOW YOU DO IT!

WELL, I, UH...

YA SEE, I HAVE ALLERGIES, AND I, UH...

YOU DO IT.

OR ARE YOU NOT PURE?

[ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]

GUESS I'LL JUST LEAN OVER AND...

TAKE A LOOKSY...

[ GULPS ] DIDDLY DEE.

OH, HEY, WE'RE HERE!

MM-HMM, MM-HMM. NICE PLACE.

-[ FARTS ] -AAAH!

[ MUFFLED SCREAMING ]

WHO ARE YOU?

[ SCREAMING ]

[ BREATHES DEEPLY ]

BRADLEY!

LET'S GO, FRIEND. LET'S GO MEET THE FOREST KING!

OH, HELLO THERE!

YOU TWO YOUNG BOYS MUST BE LOOKING FOR THE FOREST KING.

HE'S AWAY AT A VIDEO-GAME CONVENTION,

SO HE ASKED ME KINDLY IF I DIDN'T MIND LOOKING AFTER

HIS BIG BAG OF MONEY OVER THERE.

TWATTLE DEE-DEE!

SO, WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU BOYS?

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPAGHETTI OR, UH...

WE'D LIKE TO LOOK AT THE GOLD, PLEASE!

SURE, I DON'T SEE WHY NOT,

JUST SO LONG AS YOU CAN PROVE YOU'RE PURE OF HEART.

YOU FIRST, HANDSOME BOY.

I HAVE A LEVEL 25 PURE HEART, OF COURSE,

AND A PLUS-FIVE BOY-LIKE WONDER, SEE?

VERY GOOD.

NOW, WHAT ABOUT YOU, LITTLE FELLA?

UH, UM...

TWITTLE TAY TEE TOE.

UM...

THERE YA GO!

HMM...

OKAY! OFF YOU GO, BOYS!

OH, AND, BRADLEY...

SEE YA REAL SOON.

THERE YOU GO, BRADLEY. ALL THE GOLD IN IRELAND!

GET AWAY! GO ON, SCRAM!

OH, ME GOLD!

OH, ME GOLD, ME GOLD! HA HA!

BRADLEY, WHAT'S COME OVER YOU?!

YOU'RE NOT ACTING VERY BOY-LIKE.

HA HA HA! YOU'RE A REAL SAP, UNCLE GRANDPA!

I'M NOT A BOY AT ALL!

SEE?!

GAH! LEPRECHAUN!

A DIRTY, LITTLE, STINKING LEPRECHAUN!

I BET YOU THINK YOU CAN STEAL THAT GOLD!

WELL, I WON'T LET YOU!

OH, NO!

OOF!

HA HA HA!

TWODDLE TWODDLE DOO!

OH, NO! HE MADE OFF WITH THE FOREST KING'S GOLD.

MAYBE I'LL JUST LEAVE BEFORE THE FOREST KING RETURNS.

[ FANFARE PLAYS ]

THE FOREST KING RETURNS!

HEY, EVERYBODY! HEY, Y'ALL! Y'ALL MISS ME?

OH, HEY, UNCLE G. WHAT'S UP?!

THAT'S A FUNNY FACE, MAN. WHAT'S UP?

SERIOUSLY, WHAT'S UP? YOU OKA--

[ GASPS ] MY GOLD!

AW, MAN! AW, NO!

WHAT HAPPENED TO MY GOLD, MAN?

A LEPRECHAUN TOOK IT.

OH, DANG! THIS IS BAD.

GOLD IS WHAT KEEPS THIS FOREST TOGETHER.

LOOK AT THIS GUY. LOOK AT HIS WEAK LITTLE LEGS.

HE CAN'T DANCE WITH THOSE. HE CAN BARELY STAND.

AND LOOK AT THIS ONE.

IS HE SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE THAT?

YOU KNOW? I DON'T KNOW.

OH, MAN, THIS IS BAD!

WHAT SHOULD WE DO, UNCLE GRANDPA?

GEE, I DON'T KNOW.

IT'D TAKE ALL THE SPARKLES OF A RAINBOW TO CON A LEPRECHAUN.

UH! NUUHHH! IDEA!

UH, YOU OKAY, MAN?

GET YOUR FOREST CRITTERS TOGETHER

AND LEAVE THE REST TO UNCKY GUMPER!

HO TA TA DA HO DA FI DA LA TEEDLE! [ LAUGHS ]

HEY, I'M WALKING HERE!

SPARE SOME CHANGE, SIR?

NO WAY! I WORK HARD FOR ME MONEY, AND IT'S MINE!

PLEASE, SIR, CAN YOU SPARE SOME CHANGE?

NO! YOU'LL JUST SPEND IT ON SODA AND CANDIES!

[ PANTING ]

THEY'RE ALL AFTER ME LUCKY COINS.

SOME CHANGE?

GET OUT OF HERE!

[ SCREAMS ]

I NEED TO PUT ME GOLD SOMEWHERE.

SOMEWHERE SECRET, BUT WHERE?

[ SPARKLE! ]

IDEA!

[ LAUGHING ]

[ GRUNTS ]

GOT YOU, LITTLE PIGGY!

BUT -- BUT -- BUT I FOLLOWED THAT RAINBOW!

THAT AIN'T NO RAINBOW, CHUM!

THAT'S GIANT REALISTIC FLYING TIGER!

[ TING! ]

GOOD JOB, UNCLE GRANDPA, YOU DID IT!

OH, MAN, MY GOLD!

NOW MY FOREST CAN THRIVE ONCE AGAIN.

HERE YOU GO, GUYS! HAVE SOME GOLD!

GOLD FOR EVERYONE! HA HA!

NOW, YOU RETURNED MY GOLD TO ME,

AND FOR THAT I GRANT YOU ONE WISH.

HMM...

OH, I GOT IT!

THE DESTRUCTION OF ALL LEPRECHAUNS.

[ WHOOSH! ]

[ POP! ]

[ UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS ]

THAT WAS QUITE DELICIOUS.