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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:08,002 A Swiss legend tells of three herdsmen who let themselves in for the powers of evil 2 00:00:08,003 --> 00:00:15,659 and were punished gruesomely for their outrage. 3 00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:16,800 I swear to god... 4 00:06:16,823 --> 00:06:21,757 to carry out my duties as a herdsman conscientously and faithfully, 5 00:06:22,379 --> 00:06:26,023 to be without bias, 6 00:06:26,024 --> 00:06:29,724 to take good care of the kettle confided to me 7 00:06:29,725 --> 00:06:34,050 and to protect it from any harm with all my means. 8 00:06:34,068 --> 00:06:38,427 I will distribute the salt justfully among the kettle. 9 00:06:38,900 --> 00:06:41,584 I shall see to it that my fellow herdsmen 10 00:06:41,585 --> 00:06:43,872 carry out their duties carefully. 11 00:06:45,543 --> 00:06:49,677 Furthermore, I shall not hunt, 12 00:06:51,233 --> 00:06:55,767 neither socialise nor trade with strangers, 13 00:06:56,170 --> 00:07:00,213 report sacrileges or misdoings immediately 14 00:07:00,657 --> 00:07:05,547 and obediently follow the orders of the alp reeve. 15 00:07:06,614 --> 00:07:10,215 I will do so with the utmost faith and without material desires, 16 00:07:10,259 --> 00:07:14,304 with the help of the Lord and the dear saints. 17 00:08:33,085 --> 00:08:35,575 A herdsman protects. He doesn't kill. 18 00:08:46,199 --> 00:08:49,000 Next time he hits me, I'll spit on him! 19 00:08:54,734 --> 00:08:58,126 Lord, we praise thy name, 20 00:08:58,127 --> 00:09:02,494 for you do us good! 21 00:09:02,691 --> 00:09:04,958 We ask of you... 22 00:09:05,541 --> 00:09:08,263 to listen to the Alp... 23 00:09:08,786 --> 00:09:12,831 and to guard everything attached to it. 24 00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:16,610 [inaudible] 25 00:09:17,321 --> 00:09:19,899 This is the will of god... 26 00:09:20,966 --> 00:09:25,634 and the dear, holy St. Anton! 27 00:09:26,167 --> 00:09:28,434 This is the will of god... 28 00:09:29,323 --> 00:09:33,635 and of the dear, holy St. Wendel! 29 00:09:33,857 --> 00:09:36,391 This is the will of god... 30 00:09:37,725 --> 00:09:42,659 This is the will of god and the dear, holy St. Carlos... 31 00:09:44,086 --> 00:09:47,746 and of all the other dear, holy saints... 32 00:09:47,747 --> 00:09:53,704 and chosen ones belonging to the lord. 33 00:09:54,755 --> 00:09:56,887 This is god's will... 34 00:09:56,888 --> 00:10:01,378 under the holy cross! 35 00:10:01,911 --> 00:10:12,580 Praised be Jesus Christ! 36 00:11:06,110 --> 00:11:10,475 That's three a day... 37 00:11:12,867 --> 00:11:16,134 Multiplied by twenty... 38 00:11:18,291 --> 00:11:21,758 That means there are... 39 00:11:21,936 --> 00:11:27,048 One, two, three, four, five, six... 40 00:11:27,893 --> 00:11:30,826 Sixty plus three... 41 00:11:33,938 --> 00:11:38,383 Now, that's sixty plus three... 42 00:11:40,339 --> 00:11:43,183 One multiplied by ten... 43 00:11:43,184 --> 00:11:45,451 No, not ten, twelve! 44 00:11:45,718 --> 00:11:49,200 One multiplied by twelve... 45 00:11:51,542 --> 00:11:54,876 One multiplied by twelve... 46 00:12:00,615 --> 00:12:02,738 Alright, up on the slope... 47 00:12:04,705 --> 00:12:07,994 there are 140 cows. 48 00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:11,239 140... 49 00:12:11,284 --> 00:12:14,618 One, two, three, four, five... 50 00:12:14,619 --> 00:12:18,499 six, seven, eight. 51 00:12:20,575 --> 00:12:24,042 Seven days and till noon... 52 00:12:26,354 --> 00:12:28,309 We'll go back to the black mountain. 53 00:12:32,933 --> 00:12:38,711 To the black mountain. For seven days and until noon. 54 00:12:43,735 --> 00:12:45,957 Nobody's been up there since... 55 00:12:47,830 --> 00:12:50,030 I won't come! 56 00:12:54,642 --> 00:12:56,198 Look, boy... 57 00:12:58,765 --> 00:13:00,621 This helps! 58 00:13:01,441 --> 00:13:06,176 A whore's stocking and a peasant's axe, 59 00:13:06,235 --> 00:13:10,291 if that ring's closed, it's bad for the witch! 60 00:13:10,612 --> 00:13:13,878 A whore's stocking and a peasant's axe 61 00:13:13,879 --> 00:13:16,430 if the ring's closed it's bad for the witch! 62 00:13:16,439 --> 00:13:18,671 A whore's stocking and a peasant's axe 63 00:13:18,672 --> 00:13:21,209 if the ring's closed it's bad for the witch! 64 00:14:05,675 --> 00:14:08,387 Come home unharmed! 65 00:14:09,587 --> 00:14:11,810 Come home unharmed! 66 00:14:12,521 --> 00:14:15,055 Come home unharmed! 67 00:14:16,433 --> 00:14:19,011 Come home unharmed! 68 00:16:18,123 --> 00:16:22,097 Lord protect us - our dear, holy cross. 69 00:16:25,198 --> 00:16:27,608 The cross, boy! 70 00:16:33,986 --> 00:16:35,179 Go! 71 00:20:28,643 --> 00:20:30,353 You like it? 72 00:22:10,172 --> 00:22:14,762 Milk onto the grass, by God's power it'll help. 73 00:22:27,349 --> 00:22:31,663 Milk onto steel won't leave the devil a choice. 74 00:22:34,061 --> 00:22:37,081 Wherever you go, 75 00:22:37,082 --> 00:22:40,701 praise in the name of god! 76 00:22:41,055 --> 00:22:46,290 We ask of you to protect the alp... 77 00:22:46,291 --> 00:22:50,032 and everything attached to it! 78 00:22:50,033 --> 00:22:53,177 Amen! 79 00:23:19,086 --> 00:23:22,722 It's humid, isn't it? - But no thunderstorm coming. 80 00:23:23,783 --> 00:23:25,958 Sakrament! [blasphemical curse] 81 00:23:26,148 --> 00:23:28,458 No Sakrament! [Don't curse!] 82 00:23:56,464 --> 00:23:58,744 Go get some wood, boy! 83 00:24:06,130 --> 00:24:08,014 Christ! 84 00:24:09,015 --> 00:24:11,392 Yes, yes... 85 00:24:37,122 --> 00:24:38,821 Come! 86 00:24:43,622 --> 00:24:45,710 Pretty baggage! 87 00:24:46,928 --> 00:24:48,679 Baggage! 88 00:24:49,332 --> 00:24:53,416 Where have you got it, so that I can't find it? 89 00:25:55,724 --> 00:25:57,724 This will make a head. 90 00:26:06,041 --> 00:26:11,742 Two round boobies from the acre's bottom, 91 00:26:13,404 --> 00:26:15,226 a belly, 92 00:26:15,817 --> 00:26:18,037 a cunt. 93 00:26:19,429 --> 00:26:22,033 A cunt! An ass! 94 00:26:22,818 --> 00:26:25,536 I won't allow this here! 95 00:28:25,738 --> 00:28:27,742 No! 96 00:28:33,090 --> 00:28:34,870 You dirty pig! 97 00:28:42,158 --> 00:28:45,116 Biting me, huh? 98 00:29:13,562 --> 00:29:15,936 I'll grind your dick! 99 00:30:24,609 --> 00:30:27,193 Lay down and sleep, boy! 100 00:31:29,172 --> 00:31:32,695 Bruni! Come, Bruni! Look here! Good girl. 101 00:31:37,969 --> 00:31:39,587 Yes. 102 00:31:43,643 --> 00:31:46,348 Good girl. 103 00:32:02,583 --> 00:32:04,168 You can take it. 104 00:33:10,532 --> 00:33:13,315 Yes, good girl. Look! 105 00:33:59,607 --> 00:34:02,861 One day you'll end up like the herder of Sieglsvat. 106 00:34:03,612 --> 00:34:07,829 For a hundred years, he's been roaming the alp, wiping his hand on the grass. 107 00:34:07,933 --> 00:34:11,428 Because he let one cow lick more salt than the others. 108 00:34:11,630 --> 00:34:13,645 That's not fair. 109 00:34:45,867 --> 00:34:47,484 Open it. 110 00:35:18,424 --> 00:35:20,273 That's medicine! 111 00:35:21,789 --> 00:35:24,616 Why don't you drown yourself in it! 112 00:35:29,955 --> 00:35:33,209 He bit me and now I got an infection! 113 00:36:09,267 --> 00:36:11,170 Damn! 114 00:36:22,712 --> 00:36:25,293 C'mon, give me a hand and tie it up! 115 00:36:39,811 --> 00:36:41,756 Ouch! Damn! 116 00:36:44,791 --> 00:36:46,651 Skip it! 117 00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:07,287 Good, isn't it? 118 00:37:27,164 --> 00:37:29,219 Pretty baggage. 119 00:37:29,947 --> 00:37:34,327 Want some as well? Here, drink! 120 00:37:50,949 --> 00:37:53,388 Now we'll make a head! 121 00:38:07,987 --> 00:38:12,379 Two round boobies from the acre's bottom! 122 00:38:12,620 --> 00:38:16,500 A breast, a handful... 123 00:38:16,814 --> 00:38:19,750 that's one! 124 00:38:21,456 --> 00:38:28,811 A nice little belly full of jelly! 125 00:38:28,833 --> 00:38:32,774 A girl of sand from Rhineland! 126 00:38:35,585 --> 00:38:40,629 One girl of this kind is like two! 127 00:38:41,256 --> 00:38:42,725 And now, something for the legs! 128 00:38:49,442 --> 00:38:52,050 A nice little skirt... 129 00:39:06,908 --> 00:39:12,128 And what should the cunt be made of? 130 00:39:14,654 --> 00:39:19,772 And a large ass full of joy! 131 00:39:22,411 --> 00:39:29,255 And a large ass of old wood! 132 00:39:35,383 --> 00:39:39,437 That lap of hers is enough for three! 133 00:39:40,667 --> 00:39:45,865 A cunt that can never be filled! 134 00:39:49,373 --> 00:39:51,505 Hell, yes! 135 00:39:53,824 --> 00:39:55,860 Hand it over! 136 00:40:01,159 --> 00:40:03,539 The tits small and nice. 137 00:40:03,540 --> 00:40:05,510 Yes, nice! 138 00:40:12,761 --> 00:40:17,718 Two round titties from the acre's bottom, 139 00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:23,528 that's what god and holy St. Anton want! 140 00:40:26,476 --> 00:40:32,216 A nice little belly full of jelly 141 00:40:32,217 --> 00:40:38,054 that's what god and the dear holy St. Wendel want! 142 00:40:58,976 --> 00:41:05,595 What should the cunt be made of? 143 00:41:06,396 --> 00:41:09,278 This is the will... 144 00:41:09,515 --> 00:41:13,188 this is the will of god... 145 00:41:13,467 --> 00:41:18,519 and of the dear, holy St. Joseph... 146 00:41:18,520 --> 00:41:24,414 who's coming to consolate and deliver us by the... 147 00:41:25,331 --> 00:41:27,024 by the... 148 00:41:27,102 --> 00:41:32,010 - By the deathbed! 149 00:41:47,692 --> 00:41:55,278 And the big ass of Altdorf! 150 00:42:00,052 --> 00:42:02,766 [inaudible] 151 00:42:11,585 --> 00:42:14,857 Amen! 152 00:42:29,809 --> 00:42:31,918 Want some too? 153 00:42:46,339 --> 00:42:48,340 And some schnapps! 154 00:42:51,645 --> 00:42:54,185 Yeah! Yeah! 155 00:44:19,417 --> 00:44:23,182 One breast, a handful, that's one! 156 00:44:23,183 --> 00:44:27,443 A woman, one armful of her's like two! 157 00:44:27,444 --> 00:44:31,353 One ass, that lap or hers are three! 158 00:44:31,354 --> 00:44:35,062 A cunt! One that can never be filled... - Hey hey hey! 159 00:44:35,063 --> 00:44:40,799 Slow down, you stud! She's still a virgin! 160 00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:46,204 And not yet baptised. - Let's baptise her then! 161 00:44:46,647 --> 00:44:51,017 With holy water, huh? Boy, pass me the schnapps! 162 00:45:03,283 --> 00:45:06,566 I baptise you... 163 00:45:08,733 --> 00:45:11,405 In the name of the father, 164 00:45:12,577 --> 00:45:15,198 And the boy, 165 00:45:16,822 --> 00:45:19,354 And the schnapps, 166 00:45:19,726 --> 00:45:21,526 Amen! 167 00:46:56,871 --> 00:46:58,736 Sepp! 168 00:48:24,964 --> 00:48:26,649 Hey, herdsman! 169 00:48:32,329 --> 00:48:34,771 Come, get up! - What is it? 170 00:48:34,772 --> 00:48:37,504 What is it, what is it! 171 00:51:46,647 --> 00:51:48,846 You, carry on. 172 00:51:49,847 --> 00:51:52,043 My hand's aching. 173 00:52:51,568 --> 00:52:53,932 A thunderstorm's coming! 174 00:52:58,205 --> 00:53:00,806 It's coming from the east. 175 00:54:01,538 --> 00:54:03,710 What is it? 176 00:54:09,429 --> 00:54:11,336 Sit down and eat. 177 00:54:26,338 --> 00:54:27,955 Eat! 178 00:54:33,266 --> 00:54:35,469 Eat!!! 179 00:55:02,122 --> 00:55:04,828 They're all soaked! 180 00:56:06,295 --> 00:56:11,599 We ask of you to protect the alp and everything attached to it! 181 00:56:11,600 --> 00:56:16,200 This is god's will! - And of the holy St. Anton! 182 00:56:16,240 --> 00:56:19,800 This is god's will! - And of the holy St. Wendel! 183 00:56:19,866 --> 00:56:25,600 This is god's will! - For all the chosen, holy ones. 184 00:56:25,688 --> 00:56:29,200 This is god's will. - And our dear, holy cross! 185 00:56:29,289 --> 00:56:32,998 They won't help us in this storm! 186 00:57:55,418 --> 00:57:58,120 That's good, boy. 187 00:59:05,135 --> 00:59:06,563 Don't look! 188 00:59:08,201 --> 00:59:10,199 Or it will take us over. 189 00:59:52,399 --> 00:59:56,274 I'll get you, cunt of satan! 190 00:59:56,275 --> 00:59:58,075 You... 191 01:01:26,229 --> 01:01:28,078 Boy! 192 01:01:30,573 --> 01:01:32,123 Boy! 193 01:01:35,997 --> 01:01:37,728 Boy! 194 01:01:56,201 --> 01:01:58,160 Boy! 195 01:02:20,974 --> 01:02:22,902 She's taken him! 196 01:02:44,327 --> 01:02:45,806 Don't open! 197 01:03:18,955 --> 01:03:21,842 Who is it? - Me! 198 01:03:24,393 --> 01:03:25,895 The boy! 199 01:03:47,214 --> 01:03:48,676 What's the matter? 200 01:04:00,249 --> 01:04:01,923 What happened? 201 01:04:03,831 --> 01:04:05,530 What happened? 202 01:04:12,439 --> 01:04:14,560 Bruni's dead. 203 01:04:16,562 --> 01:04:20,789 She made a false step, fell. 204 01:04:21,390 --> 01:04:24,778 Down the rocks into the river. 205 01:04:28,006 --> 01:04:32,253 Doesn't move. Won't give no more milk. 206 01:06:52,061 --> 01:06:53,451 Watch out! 207 01:07:49,674 --> 01:07:53,530 The bull shall screw her, then she'll have enough! 208 01:07:54,767 --> 01:07:55,608 Yes! 209 01:07:57,253 --> 01:07:59,431 You damned witch! 210 01:08:04,992 --> 01:08:07,177 Fetch the rope, boy! 211 01:08:32,383 --> 01:08:34,835 Get the bull! - Yes! 212 01:09:53,020 --> 01:09:54,568 Give me the rope, boy! 213 01:10:52,703 --> 01:10:54,764 Good. 214 01:12:17,559 --> 01:12:19,557 Now she's done for. 215 01:14:12,150 --> 01:14:13,962 Come now, boy! 216 01:14:17,469 --> 01:14:19,705 Go ahead, cut! 217 01:14:20,022 --> 01:14:21,638 Cut! 218 01:14:41,944 --> 01:14:47,218 Blood doesn't melt like snow, blood averts forever. 219 01:16:22,968 --> 01:16:24,412 Come boy! 220 01:16:24,513 --> 01:16:27,732 Wake up. We'll leave. 221 01:16:29,733 --> 01:16:31,457 We won't stay here! 222 01:16:39,530 --> 01:16:42,087 Go, boy! Get going! 223 01:16:44,010 --> 01:16:46,833 Roundup the kettle on the lawn! 224 01:20:43,886 --> 01:20:49,052 The very same evening, some men from my village went up the black mountain, 225 01:20:49,053 --> 01:20:53,339 made a doll just like the witch and burnt it, 226 01:20:53,340 --> 01:20:56,762 so that the ban would be in force. 227 01:21:40,625 --> 01:21:47,020 Subtitled by AnDeRsSoN for Cinemageddon - March 2010 14046

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