Original subtitles

Safety First at Tomorrowland... - A safe choice.

Because, with discipline... - Dedication and...

...friendship, we provide the best service that...

OK. Maybe a short summary?

Sure, but it only lasts another 23 minutes. So maybe if we...

We can just summarize it. Maybe that's better.

That's better, Dirk.

So...

Oh, my ergonomics. One moment.

So... uh, Safety First and Tomorrowland are a...

A safe choice? - Yes.

Repetition. Clever. Works. Preferably a bit faster.

Oh, right, no, I understand.

Fast-forward.

Look. Tomorrowland, security 800 people.

How does your team fit into that? Skills, proficiencies, competencies.

Oh, competencies? Lots. Of course. No problem.

We are on the same 'wavelength'. Me as Head of Security.

But you as Over... Head, in fact.

Maybe it would be better to just watch the film.

Dirk?

Dirk Porrez?

Andy.

Long time no see. Are you applying for a job too?

No. No, no. I work here. I'm the Assistant to the Security Manager.

Wow, a happy reunion. Nice. Great. Another time maybe?

Hey, Hilde, we were looking for people for the VIPs. Can't these guys do that?

That requires specific experience.

We've experienced loads of VIPs.

DJs even. - Regi.

DJ Regi. And DJ Trump.

Donald John Trump.

How about if I take over?

I came to tell you they are waiting for you at the staff meeting.

Shit. Andy, can you take care of this? Thanks. My savior. Guys.

Bye. - Can you come with me?

Dirk Porrez. - Yes, correct.

Take a seat.

Right. The VIP village. Are you wearing socks with a tiger on them?

That's Dirk's favorite animal.

Mine's a tapir.

I was given them. - Oh, by your partner?

No, by the WWF.

Oh. Usually you give to the WWF.

Unless you are a protected species. Are you a protected species?

No, I was given them when I adopted a tiger via them.

Oh. And when are you going to tell it you're not its real father?

No, I think those socks are real cute.

Right, the VIP village. That's where the dressing rooms are for...

For the DJs. - For the DJs. Yes.

And... Now, access to the entire site will be restricted and gates...

Tomorrowland, we are coming at you.

Dirk, that PowerPoint was brilliant. - Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah.

And that Andy, eh? - Yeah.

He was so gay. - I don't think so.

Sure was. I've got a real good gay radar. From 100 yards away... beep, beep, ping.

Always right. - Yeah. But not Andy.

He always hung around with the girls. - As their gay best friend, Dirk.

He did loads of sport, Smos. We did badminton together.

Badminton? Gay tennis. But that's OK, Dirk.

More chicks for us, eh? - Yes. More... Yes.

Because at Tomorrowland... I've seen pictures. Great...

women.

The average chick there is a 7.

Normally it's 5, 5 1/2 max, here in Boom.

Approximately.

Have you got anything against homosexuals?

Yes.

Pepper spray.

My gay radar works like a parking sensor.

It goes beep, beep, beep, beeeep in my head.

And then I know: Watch out, there's a pole behind me.

Dirk, he's in the man cave. - Oh right, in the...

Look who it is. The heroes of Tomorrowland.

VIP security. Thanks to Dirk.

Very Important Porrez.

Yeah, we should celebrate. Some melon tequila? It's good for sore legs.

I've brought a bottle of sparkling wine. Slovenian.

A very acceptable price-quality ratio according to one consumer magazine.

An egg triangle?

A gas station by the expressway went bankrupt.

Mr. Clever here snapped up twelve boxes of egg salad sandwiches.

They are supposedly out of date

but that's just marketing so they sell more sandwiches.

Oh, wow. This still works. - That's quality, that is.

Knocked 'em out at lots of weddings with it. I always started with Barry White.

Followed right away, bang... by La Bamba.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I tend to play big room and electrohouse.

And... my own numbers, of course.

Put it on. There are enough cables. - Really?

How's Ingrid? Everything... chill?

Want to see the photos of the birth? - No, Luc, no. Put that away.

Don't keep asking me. It's...

I don't get why people don't want to see the photos. It's a miracle.

It's like a bowling ball being pushed through the opening in a mailbox.

It also took a while before the mailman called again.

Hey, give that here.

OK, the number is called You Are Beautiful.

Don't stand too close to the speakers, it'll blast your socks off.

OK.

Oh no.

Dammit.

Techno Turlinckx will fix it again.

Oops. Will it be OK?

Well? What did you think of my number?

Good. Good. Good... rhythm.

And lots of... bits... beats. - Thanks.

Hey, take it with you to Tomorrowland.

What? We're guarding the VIPs there. Get one of those big names to listen to it...

They may play it at Tomorrowland.

We're there to work, guys. VIP protection.

Not VIP... do-whatever-you-like, eh?

We wouldn't be bothering those guys, Dirk.

We'd just put it on a flash drive, hand it over and that's it.

Better still. I drop the flash drive off in one of the dressing rooms and go.

In fact, it's just a drop and go.

Yeah, yeah. When you put it like that.

OK. OK. A drop and go is allowed. But only as an exception. OK?

Thanks, Dirk. You're beautiful.

Oh! What's that?

Smos. - Are you all right?

Are you OK? - Yes, I'm OK.

That's high, isn't it? - Yeah, but I'm OK. I'm fine.

OK, team, briefing. Site: VIP area. Hermetically sealed.

Outside team: Luc and me. Patrolling around the building.

Inside team: Smos and Ingrid. You are guarding the automatic gates.

Smos... VIP badge. Go.

Dirk, can't I go out on patrol? - Position switch?

No. In case a woman needs to be frisked.

We can always frisk the women.

Yeah, fris... fris...

Right, VIP. The festival is only opening in four hours' time.

But, nevertheless, focus. Because before then the DJs and other VIPs...

Good morning. - Oh, Hildy. Hilde... Hilde and Andy.

Team Safety First, good morning. At your post and raring to go. Welcome.

We're going for a fantastic festival. - Yes, and a safe festival.

I personally guarantee everything is tip and top...

What's this? - That was already there.

That's me.

Yep, my flash drives.

I just thought a little gift for the DJs.

Promotional material. Marketing. Enterprising. Smart.

As a security guard... out of place.

Out of place or in a different place?

Out of place. Stalking DJs... the exact opposite of your job.

But I'll hand them out before the festival starts, Mrs Hilde.

The DJs will be here beforehand.

Determined. Persistent. Excellent. I respect that.

I'm going to take these bags with me.

How can I drop and go then?

Drop and go? I've no idea what that is. What is it? isit to do with security?

It's not? Then don't do it.

Hilde, have you got a second? - Sure.

Main stage. Beers, hold on a moment. - Good luck, guys.

Maybe you should introduce me to your team first?

Yes, of course. Team, this is Andy. Smos you've already met. Luc Turlinckx.

Call me Luc. Or Turlinckx. Or Luc Turlinckx.

And our Ingrid. - Hello, Andy.

Oh, Ingrid. Wow. You've grown into a real woman.

Certainly has. I've just checked. - Luc, hey.

Shall I give you a tour first? Show you everything?

Great. - Grab your swimming gear and we'll go.

Swim... Swim... I haven't... There's blue-green algae in there.

Oh, you rascal.

Sorry, I'll have to pass, Andy.

Leaving my post and leaving others to do the work...

No, no. You don't have to worry about us, Dirk.

We'll step it up a gear, Dirk.

Yeah, well, tours are rather a hobby of mine.

Let's go. - Check.

Dirk?

What about the slogan?

Oh. Sorry. Well done, Smos.

Discipline, dedication and...

Friendship. - But...

Safety First. - Definitely Safety First.

Right, come on.

Hey!

I said: Hash browns? I don't think so. More like hashed-up browns.

These are my control room boys. Boys, look here.

This is Dirk Porrez, Head of Security from the firm Safety First.

Hello. - They're doing the VIPs.

Hello, Dirk.

I'm Patrick. And this ugly critter here is Danny.

Ugly critter, ugly critter... isthere a photo of your wife behind me?

Hey. Does my missus still fit on one photo these days?

Yeah, because your wife is so fat

she has a lower than average life expectancy.

Then you're rid of her faster. - Yeah, that's true.

Hey, Andy, your kind has got the right idea.

Yeah, with two men at home you haven't got all that nagging.

There's nothing to stop you changing sides.

It's just a bit painful to start with.

After a few goes it's like chucking a bratwurst along a corridor.

Or, in Patrick's case, a mini pepperoni.

Oh, Patrick. - Haven't you two got any work to do?

Come on. Work, work, work. - I'll check the 22.

Wow, they're a couple of scallywags.

You just have to know how to deal with them.

Ingrid.

Oh, shit. Sorry, Smos.

Sorry. - It's OK. All the same...

We'll have to do that again.

There's no one here. I could have gone home first.

Come on, Waes. Stop moaning.

How many here can say they've come straight from Ibiza?

That's Tom Waes. - And that's Dimitri Vegas.

From Dimitri Vegas & Like Mike but without Like Mike.

So why don't you say something? - What if they think my number is no good?

Come on, Smos. I think it's real good. So do Luc and Dirk.

Yeah, it is a wicked disc, isn't it?

There you are.

Go on, Smos, just go to that Dimitri's and Vegas's and everyone's dressing room.

And play them your number. - Ingrid...

I'm going to do it.

Vegas, here we come.

My number played at Tomorrowland,

that's a dream come true. But it's a good thing it's that dream that comes true.

Because I sometimes dream that all my teeth fall out.

That's scary.

So, for example... take your VIP area.

That's 80.

There you are. - Look, our Ingrid.

The corridor to the DJs' dressing rooms is 83. There you are.

What's he doing there?

Sorry. Normally... Discipline is usually...

Hold on. Hold on.

Hey!

May I? - Sure, go on.

Smos, go back to your post, buddy. There are cameras everywhere here.

Focus.

And this is the voice of Dirk Porrez.

There you go.

Follow the guide. - Yep.

There will be other opportunities.

Tomorrowland is the only one that counts. Where else can I play my number?

At a dumb foam party in some backwater? - I'm here. What's up?

Luc, can you take a look at those gates? They're lethal.

Don't exaggerate.

I came close to being jammed between them a couple of times.

Darling, look.

The gates can't close if someone is between them.

It's not possible. They've got a sensor, like in an elevator. Look, watch.

Feel better now?

Oh shit. Oh no.

Your tool.

Dial 911. - Push.

Is that your ball? - Go on, push. Go on.

I am pushing. - Push. Push with...

Go on, Smos.

Are you all right?

Hey, Luc, you can't get that out. This place is full of cameras.

Come on, pal. Cameras in the toilets.

No way. That's illegal. Privacy.

What a brilliant idea!

I can play them my number here. Those DJs have to use the toilet too, don't they?

Does that look normal to you?

It looks real good. Ready to go.

It's not a strange color? I can't see in this light.

Hey, Luc, no eye contact while holding your enchilada.

Sorry. But the color...

Hold on.

Here. Look.

It looks the same. - Yeah.

That sets my mind at ease.

So, pal. You shave it?

If you cut back the bushes, the tree looks bigger. Come on.

And, in the end, they had to replace all the paneling.

Paneling can be a real problem, can't it? - Yes.

There, that's the end of the tour.

Oh no, I need to get on. I've wasted enough time.

Well, not wasted. I really enjoyed you, very interesting... It.

I really enjoyed it, it was very interesting. The opposite of wasted.

Un... wasted.

You're welcome.

Okey-dokes.

Hold on, Dirk. I... I've got something for you.

What kind of screwdriver do you need? - What kind of screwdriver don't I need.

Eh? - Well, uh...

There you are but return it.

Pardon?

Bring... bring it back.

Or else?

You'll phone security, or what?

Well? What do you think of your present?

That will never fit in my car.

But it's only for today...

Oh, that's a good one. That's a good one.

This is fantastic. How did you know? - Well, I thought...

A real Head of Security can hardly walk around, can he?

I've been saying that for years. - Get in.

When I left home this morning I never thought

I'd end up with wheels.

Uh... oops.

It's very simple. There aren't any gears,

just drive or reverse. - That's easy.

And can you hear that? That's for when you reverse.

And... that is for the...

Oops... Oh.

I have to get on with my work...

OK. OK.

Careful. It's all right. It's all right.

Oh. Oh, sorry. - It's all right. It's all right.

I'm pleased for Dirk.

Gay, straight, makes no difference.

It's like road cycling and cyclo-cross.

I'm more of a hill-climbing man.

But Dirk likes cycling through the mud now and then. That's fine too.

What? With which Andy? - Andy from just now.

That's not possible. Dirk is as straight as...

snow chains. - I saw it with my own eyes.

What did you see? - Them sitting close together.

That doesn't prove anything. We're standing close together. Look.

Yeah, yeah... They kissed.

Kissed? - What?

Well... As good as. - Yeah, right, Luc... As good as.

They were suspiciously close together. - What? Like this? Look.

Ingrid and I are kissing.

Did you never notice anything about Dirk?

No, of course not. Come on, Luc, stop the drivel...

I'm going out on patrol until those gates are repaired. Position switch.

I know what I saw. - Look, I'm kissing the gates.

Look how close I am to them.

There are two things I hate. People not believing me

and green peppers.

It gives me indigestion.

Wow.

How was it? How was the tour? - Good. Good. Good.

Triple good.

Great tour... by Andy. - Yeah, Andy, yeah. Yeah.

You two seem to get on real well. - No.

Well... Just normal, well, average.

Dirk, I am your sister, remember. - Yes.

I've known for ages. - Known? Known what?

That you like men. - But... I don't like men.

You like men.

Dirk, if you're gay... - Hey, hey, hey.

I'm not... not... I'm not like that. It's a matter of making choices.

If I don't want to be like that, then I'm not like that, OK? That's how it works.

If I don't want to be a baker, I don't have to start a bakery.

It's exactly the same.

You have to give yourself the chance to be happy.

I am happy.

But you've been on your own for so long.

That's because I don't need anyone. I find other things to make me happy, Ingrid.

Like...

Here, new shoes for men. 45 dollars...

Luc saw the two of you together.

Dirk, today may be a good day to tell people.

Ingrid, promise me that... that you... - Shhh, it's all right. I'll keep quiet.

But I really do think you are making a huge mistake.

What time are you playing your set?

I don't know exactly. Later somewhere.

I'm a DJ too.

Great.

I made a number. Do you want to hear it?

I'm trying to concentrate. Can you...

Oh, sorry. No problem. I'll wait. - Thanks.

Would you like me to turn on the faucet?

I failed. But that doesn't matter. My number's not for Dutch guys like him.

Windmills, clogs.

Cheese.

Suppose... - Ow, shit.

Dammit, Dirk. Jeez, buddy! Where did you suddenly come from?

I thought you knew I was here. - That's taken a year off my life.

What I wanted to say was: Suppose... you see something...

Well, you think you see something but what you see isn't what you think you see.

So you're saying I don't know what I see too?

No, I'm saying sometimes there are things...

Oh, uh... Hi, sir. - Sir?

Can you come to the big wheel? - It's... it's real busy here.

I'd still like you to come. See you in five minutes?

OK, check. - Bye.

Roger that. I have to... meeting.

Yeah, yeah.

Luc to Ingrid. Position switch.

Gates have been repaired. I'm off out on patrol.

Andy. - Don't say anything, Dirk. Just get in.

Just get in.

I have to tell you, heights don't agree with me.

Well, differences in height. My inner ear is highly sensitive

and OK, we're off.

Shit.

Where are you, pal?

Oh, you naughty boy. - Sorry.

Oh, sorry. You seemed to think I was going to kill you.

Yes, or even worse, fire me.

Sorry. Sorry, but I just wanted to talk to you and...

I thought he can't run away here.

Oh, talk... uh...

What happened just now or what was going to happen...

if that was too forward of me...

then I'm sorry.

Phhh...

It's just...

I do like you.

Or we could just forget the whole thing... - No, I... I think you are...

great.

Just look at the two of us sitting here. Like two teenagers.

Porrez, can I borrow your eraser?

There.

Well, well.

There you go.

Isn't that Walk On Water?

That's not my number. - No, that's by Milk Inc.

Yes, it is. Here.

Come on, Smos. Come on.

Luc, not now. - Hey, sorry.

Hold on. - Next time.

Goddammit, Luc. I was here with Yves V.

Dirk is on the big wheel with Andy. - What?

That's romantic. They aren't doing anything romantic?

Come and see for yourself. And bring one of those egg triangles with you.

Where are you going?

Luc wants me to come to the big wheel. - What? No, Smos, wait.

Did you realize I was in love with you when we were young?

In love with me... Love is a big word.

It's not. It's only 7 points.

What?

Sorry. Scrabble. - Oh. You know that by heart?

Yes. Well, I...

It's not something I'm proud of. I had lots of spare time.

Squeezability.

Thirty-six.

No, don't. - Maneuverability.

Seventy-five. Stop it, Dirk.

So... I like you. You think I'm great.

Now what?

Let's go for it.

But... But not here. Not at work.

Let's first... dates, do dates.

OK. OK, we'll date.

Tiger.

And you?

Spider. No, that's not very good. I'll think of something better.

Smos, were are you?

Oh, there you are. - Sorry. But I shouldn't leave my post.

It's all Dirk does. He just went off with Andy.

Is he over there? - Did you bring that egg triangle?

Come on.

Oh, sorry.

Excuse me, young man, I... Oh...

Say no... to drugs... eh, man?

It's just a cigarette. - OK, great. Cigarettes are OK for sure.

Except for the cancer. Your lives... You'll die early.

Or not. It depends. Genes and stuff. Do you do a lot of sport?

Can I help you with something or...? - Yes, those friendship bracelets.

How exactly do they work?

How exactly does it work?

Yes. When I was young you bought two the same, gave one away

and kept one for yourself.

You can do that. Yeah, yeah. - Two of those then, please.

In a bag?

No, I'll eat them here.

That's ten dollars. - Oh, there you are, twenty.

Hold on, come here.

Not too tight, I've got poor circulation.

Hello, Dirk.

Smos and I were wondering what you were doing on the big wheel with Andy.

As Head of Security I need to have an overview of the whole area, Luc.

Bird's view, eh?

Yeah, yeah. Like a hawk.

Andy had to show you everything, I suppose?

There you are, buddy. Good luck with them. - Good luck with what?

Love.

Who were you going to give that to? - A woman.

Which woman? - Any woman.

Of course, Dirk.

Don't be fussy. Fat, thin, blond, brown, brunette, redhead. Definitely redhead.

Redhead? You know what they say, redheads are good at odd jobs.

No, no, no, that's not quite what they say.

There's a redhead behind the bar in the VIP area. Typically your type.

Oh, right, who knows, maybe I'll court her.

Yeah?

I'd like to see how you propose to do so. - Propose?

Luc, I put the pro in propose. I put it in there.

Good one, Dirk, pal. Good one. Do you get it? Dirk is a pro.

Learn from the master. - Yes, indeed, Smos.

And if she won't play ball, I'll play with my balls by myself.

Come on.

There is a side to Dirk we don't know about. I swear there is.

Do you think so? - Definitely.

Hey, playboy, with your Jaguar.

Foot on the gas, go on.

What technique will you use? The blind grandmother or the rotating door?

No, the parrot. - Oh, the parrot. How did that go again?

Ingrid. Suppose I were to buy you a parrot for Valentine's Day.

Would you put it on this shoulder or this shoulder?

Oh, yeah. Well, in my experience, if I want to make a pass at the ladies...

Make a pass at the ladies?

Don't let yourself be bullied into doing something you don't...

But I do. There's nothing I'd like more. It's...

So what are you waiting for then?

Oh, she's with Tom Waes now. Look, there.

A celebrity. I can't compete with that, Luc. What a shame.

I'll soon sort that out.

Dirk, you're making a real fool of yourself. Stop this nonsense.

Are you serious? There isn't any food?

There is. But we've had a power failure. We can't heat up anything.

I'm hungry. - Yeah...

Tom Waes, two questions, answer at once. Do you like bread?

Yes. - Do you like egg salad?

Yes. - Come on then, I'll look after you.

She's alone. Now's your chance. - Go, Dirk. Go, Dirk. Don't. Let him go.

Here you are. Egg salad, as many as you can eat. Help yourself.

Hey, thanks, man. - Yo.

What are you doing? - Feeding a celebrity.

No, to our Dirk.

Darling, if your boss is determined to prove how straight he is...

But you... - Shhh. Dirk is making his moves.

Would you like a drink?

Would... Would you... Would you like a drink?

Is something wrong?

If you got a parrot for Valentine's Day, would you put it here or here?

Do you come here often?

Sorry, I really do have to get on.

It's like this. I'm... My name is Porrez. Dirk Porrez.

And I've got a friendship bracelet here.

Dirk.

Are you all right? - Yes, of course. I'm fine.

Fresh mint.

Oops. Maybe you should go out to the car and fetch your spare pants.

Why? I... - Then you can get out of here.

Oh yeah, that's probably best. I just have to go to the car, guys.

Keep positions and carry on.

Look, he's wriggling out of it again.

I'll come with you, Dirk. - No, Luc. Don't, wait. Don't.

I did something stupid. - Now what?

I wanted to turn off those stupid gates and... I accidentally

cut off the catering's power supply. Can you fix it, please?

Hey, tigerman. - Hey. I've got a present for you.

Yes, so I see. - What?

Oh no, that is mojito.

I was going to fetch some clean pants but I couldn't wait.

Oh, Dirk. That is so sweet. - Hold on.

Yeah. No. Oh.

You have lovely eyes. Do you know that?

Yeah, eyes, yeah. I can't see them myself, eh?

You can in the mirror. - The mirror.

Yeah, the mirror is the eyes of the soul. So they say.

There you are.

Tom Waes?

I'll give you an autograph in a minute. I'm busy right now.

That security guy gave me out-of-date egg salad.

Oh, that's terrible.

I saw you know Dimitri Vegas.

I'm a DJ too. Would you like to hear my number maybe?

Go on then, play it. I'll be sitting here for a while anyway.

Really? Great. It's with headphones.

Fine, pass them in. - OK? Got them?

What was that splash? - The phone fell onto my back.

What? Your back doesn't splash. - It slipped off. Dammit. Shit.

What, shit? Shit?

What was that? - Sorry.

What, sorry? Sorry?

Oh, man. This is so embarrassing. Sorry. I'll pay for it.

Tom Waes, did you poo on my cell phone?

No.

Oh, yes.

Oh no. - Where does it keep coming from?

Stop it then. - I would if I could.

Oh my God, Tom Waes.

Yeah, that was disgusting.

It was disgustingly disgusting.

I didn't flush. Maybe...

That's awful. - Yeah, sorry, I'll make it up to you.

Have you got a laptop? - What, so you can shit on that too?

No, seriously. If you've got that number on a laptop, bring it with you.

There's a pre-party with Dimi and Mike. Come to it and I'll sort something out.

All right. - OK?

My MacGyver. Thank you. - That'll do, go on.

Are these car keys yours? - Yes, they are our Dirk's. Thank you.

You've got a guilty conscience. Why did you quickly hide those car keys?

What? - Fetch some clean pants, my ass.

I knew it, you're in cahoots with Dirk.

I don't know what you're on about.

Ingrid, come out of those cahoots and admit he has the hots for Andy.

Yeah... Luc, I really did want to tell you

but I promised our Dirk I wouldn't say anything.

It's all right. It's OK. Now you can tell Smos too.

No, Luc, I can't. - But it's only fair.

No, it's bad enough I told you.

But Smos will...

No, Smos will never believe me. He doesn't want to hear that.

Then we'll show him.

Today is the last chance of our Dirk ever coming out of the closet.

Just give him some space. - Space? He's had space for 39 years.

You know as well as I do that he will only tell us if he has no other choice.

Yeah... Yeah, if Smos were to actually see it...

Then Smos will have to admit I'm right.

And Dirk will have to come out of his closet.

You happy, me happy. In short, a happy ending.

Yeah. All right then.

Hey... Hey, what's up? - Sorry.

It's an intense day for me too. He is my brother.

Come here.

It's OK. It will all be fine.

Luc's approach may be a bit like a bull in china shop

but Dirk can sometimes do with a bull in his china shop.

Hey!

Dirk is with Andy again. Come with me. That's not good for your reception.

All my flash drives are gone and my cell phone is broken.

Come on, come with me. Otherwise we'll be too late.

I've just been given a great opportunity and I can't take advantage of it.

What are you talking about? - My number, Luc.

It's all your egg salad's fault.

Hey.

Guess what's on here.

You're a wonderful person, Luc Turlinckx. You're got the heart of a tapir.

Mitts off. Come with me to Andy first. Then you can have it.

OK, hurry up then. - Come on.

Is this your card? - Wow, man, crazy. That's magic.

It's actually real simple. Oh no. - What?

What is that behind your ear?

Oh, man. I thought a suspicious tumor or something. With all that WiFi these days.

What?

Wow, Yoko Ono played here too. - No, that's Steve Aoki.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, from the Aoki Noodles. Yeah.

Are you OK? - Of course, Andy.

I can call you Andy, can't I? I need to go. Ciao.

Dirk. Dirk. Dirk?

Dirk, is everything OK? - Andy, what's happened?

I don't know, I... - What's up with Dirk?

Well, he's... I don't know.

Dirk, Smos and Luc Turlinckx here. Are you there?

Dirk.

Dirk, if you can hear us, make a racket right now.

I'm going to open the door. Out of my way. Move. Go on.

Ow, shit! I helped Paul move his stove at the weekend.

Dirk. - Andy, out of the way. Fireball.

Dirk.

Come on, push. Push hard.

Dirk? - Where is he?

Dirk?

I don't believe this.

One, two, three, yes.

Pull! - Hold on, Dirk. We're coming. Come on.

Yeah, hold on. One, two, three.

Why, Andy?

Dirk. - Your buddies are there.

Go on, let him go. Go on. One, two, three.

All right, guys? - All right, Dirk?

We should do this more often. - Oh man. Thanks.

What are you doing here? You were going to go to the car for some pants.

Yes. Yes, I was on my way to...

You weren't. You didn't take your car keys.

No. No, like you've just said, Smos. I didn't take my car keys with me.

So I had to go and get some stain remover.

On the balcony? - Yeah, I took the wrong exit, Luc.

And at that moment the door went into unforeseen lockdown.

Wow, Dirk, that is heavy shizzle.

Right, finished your chat? Everyone up to date? Great.

Porrez, remove your sleeves and come up here.

Yeah, I thought... - Yeah, eh? Yeah.

Dirk? Are you OK?

What went on here? - You'll never believe it.

Unforeseen lockdown. Every security guard's worst nightmare.

He'd rather jump off a balcony than come out of the closet.

Can I have that drive?

No, Smos, this isn't sorted yet. Ingrid, tell Smos. Is Dirk gay?

Not that I know of. - What?

I have to go to Dimitri Vegas & Like Mike's dressing room now.

I'm not letting that chance slip because you...

I saw it this morning for myself. I was standing there. They were over there in...

There. It was all filmed. Goddammit.

Maybe we can see... - Flash drive? A promise is a promise.

Smos. About that flash drive...

Your number isn't on here. Just photos of...

That's not true.

Your number isn't on there, Smos.

Oh, forget it, pal. Hey, thanks for backing me up.

I promised our Dirk I wouldn't say anything, Luc. Didn't I?

What happened to your happy ending?

Maybe that film... - Maybe?

You are going to make sure you get that film, Luc Turlinckx.

Yeah, yeah.

I think you're sexy when you order me around like that.

Do you?

Come on then, come over here.

And then I tested various cleaning products

in order to thus remove the stain in question from the pants in question.

No.

What do you mean, no? - Your story. No.

What Dirk is trying to say...

And you're defending this drivel? Nice. Noble. Getting on my nerves now.

Hey, Hilde. - Drivel may be a bit of an exaggeration.

Doors open in fifteen minutes. Sixty thousand people.

Have I got time for bullshit? No.

I take responsibility for it. Dirk really has...

Dirk, Dirk, Dirk. What is going on? Something is going on.

Is something going on? I don't know.

Well... - Focus on the job. Both of you.

And on nothing else.

Oh, I should never... I have to return to my post. I have to focus.

No, no, come on. - Yes, I have to. My dedication. Andy.

This isn't the end of the world. - What will Hilde think?

Hilde is just a bit stressed.

Otherwise she would have reacted differently.

Jumping off the balcony. Doing a stunt. Great. Sporty.

She'll hear you, if you're not careful. - Hear me? Sound. Audio. Ear. Handy.

Floor, ceiling, hall. Great. I'm Hilde.

What was that all about out there on the balcony just now?

Oh, that was just a joke. The typical jump-off-the-balcony joke.

Never heard of it. - Haven't you? It's a classic.

By Laurel & Hardy. No, by... by Jerry Seinfeld.

Look at me. I'm climbing off the balcony.

Airline food.

Are you ashamed of me?

You don't want your friends to see you with me. Is that it?

Andy, it's just... I haven't...

It's still... I haven't told them about my inclination.

Dirk, why didn't you tell me?

The doors will be open soon and there will be 60,000 men, women and children here.

Probably not children. - This is more important, isn't it?

Look who it is. - Here, a flash drive.

Dimi, that's the guy.

Hey, Mr. Vegas. This is a great honor. Would you sign my shoe?

I haven't got your CDs with me and this is my dance shoe.

OK. Got a pen on you?

There you are.

Go ahead. - Thank you, Mr. Vegas.

Hello, everybody. My name is Smos. And I made a song, a number.

Tom Waes, play the fucking music. - Come on then.

OK...

That's not right. - That's all that's on there.

Nothing.

Wait. Wait, everybody. It's a really good number.

It is, it's somewhere between future house and big room.

And it starts with a real mega drop.

Thanks.

Your head gives you an idea and only afterwards does it say it's a bad idea.

I wished the ground would open up and swallow me, I really did. Like this.

No, don't follow me down. I wanted to disappear from the screen.

I'm not going to start some sort of secret relationship. I'm sorry, but...

But what do I say, Andy? Hi, yo, this is Dirk Porrez.

I've lied to all of you all my life. High five. Yolo.

It's never too late to be honest, is it?

I mean... I don't know your friends very well but they care for you, don't they?

They will be fine about it.

I'm going to do it. I'll tell them.

I don't want to lose you.

Make sure you do it, eh?

Promise?

Wish me all the luck.

Go tell them. Tiger.

I will tell them... Spider.

No, that isn't... You need to... think of...

Go on then.

Post one, check.

Check.

Post two, check. - Check.

Post three, check.

Check.

No problem.

My fault. I take full responsibility. - Post four, check.

I'm almost out of here. - Check.

Post five, check.

Right, bye then.

Post five, check. - Check.

OK, doors open

in four, three, two, one...

And we're off.

Hold on a minute, I don't get it. What was on that flash drive then?

Photos of your...

tool shed.

Luc and his man cave.

Yeah. - Smos, you poor thing.

Ingrid, Smos, I... - Oh.

No, there's something I have to tell you. An important personal tale.

But everyone has to be here, so... Dirk for Luc. Come in.

Oh, Luc is... - No, no...

Tell Luc later and tell us now already.

No, all my friends have to be here, so...

Dirk for Luc, come in, please.

Luc, come in, come on. - He has gone to the control room.

What? Why?

He is determined to prove that you are a...

a faggot.

How ridiculous is that? - Why don't you just tell us

what you came to tell us. Eh?

The... control room? - He's looking for film

of you apparently... making out with Andy.

As if you are a fairy, Dirk. - What did you come to tell us?

You said something personal. It's not your birthday, is it?

I've forgotten your birthday.

Yes, that's it. - No, no, it's not your birthday.

Focus on... Focus on the job, that's what I wanted to say.

That is important to me personally. - Of course, Dirk. I'll go and get Luc.

I'll go. No problem. I'm outside team, eh?

So that's my jurisdiction. - Shit.

Goddammit.

Well, buddy?

No speak English.

Yeah, yeah, just let it play.

Just let it play. Go on.

Is that Andy? Is that...

No... - No, no, no.

Look who it is, Andy's new boyfriend.

Watch out, Patrick. Keep your back to the wall.

Yeah, safety first, eh?

Porrez, incredible. What is it with you?

How many more times? This isn't a nursery. - Sorry, this is beyond our control. Look.

I don't want to hear it. Everyone back to their post. Why are you still here?

Go on, off to the VIP area.

Not you, Porrez. Come here.

What's this?

A monitor?

Hitting on your superior. Unprofessional, not allowed.

Of course, which is why I didn't hit on anyone.

But I can see you did. - No.

What do you mean, no? - Images like that are misleading.

Think of the moon landing. - Here, real clear. You go to kiss him.

No, I didn't want to. - I don't follow. What didn't you want?

Sexual advances.

Sexual advances? Is there something you should tell me, Porrez?

Unwanted sexual advances.

Sorry. I didn't know. Sorry.

It's OK. If I can just... - Of course you can, of course.

Sorry, man. Really, I tried to...

What happened? - Is everything OK, Dirk?

Dirk?

Now look. You and your gay obsession. He's having a nervous breakdown.

If you hadn't said Luc was in the control room, this wouldn't have happened.

Jeez, Smos.

Your lies have done enough damage.

My lies? I never lie. - Oh no?

So why was I there with those DJs with a flash drive full of photos of Ingrid's...

front bottom?

Of what? - You Judas.

All because you don't want to believe... - There's nothing to believe. Dirk is...

not a faggot. - Stop calling him a faggot.

You're calling him a faggot. I say he's not.

He drinks cherry beer, pal.

He watches the Song Festival every year. He drinks cherry beer while he watches it.

He's a music lover.

He's not, he watches the Song Festival. - Enough.

Leave the Song Festival out of it. And stop all the gossiping.

Haven't you got anything better to do? Like your job...

Dirk... There is a serious misunderstanding going on.

Hilde is accusing me of making unwanted sexual advances.

Hilde? - You have to come and explain

that they are wanted, eh?

Tiger?

I'm not a homosexual, you know.

I... I thought you liked me.

Yes, as a customer.

Yeah, I wouldn't eat the scampi. Move along.

Dirk? Breathe, Dirk. - Smos, leave him alone for a moment.

He'll come out when he's ready. - I swear, that fucking Andy...

I've got nothing against gays but they should leave normal people alone.

What are you doing? - Stop it.

Stop what, Ingrid? - Stop it.

Don't be silly, Ingrid. - Stop it. Now.

I didn't say anything. - Don't you see what you're doing to him?

I haven't done anything wrong. - I'm gay.

I'm gay.

Hey...

That is... That is absolutely fine, Dirk, buddy.

So all those years...

Smos. - The whole of our friendship...

is a lie.

Here. Look. It's working again.

But you can't make calls with it.

I suppose you're pleased.

You were right. I was wrong.

It's no longer about being right.

It's about Dirk.

My father always said:

You can shave a pheasant

but that doesn't mean it can play cards. - You can shave a pheasant

but that doesn't mean it can play cards. You've just made that up, Luc.

But I get what you mean.

Gay or not, Dirk is still Dirk.

But I have to get to know him again now.

No, you don't. All you've done is come across an extra piece of Dirk.

It's like when you think you've taken the last cookie.

Then you take the bottom out and there's another whole layer of cookies underneath.

Only now it's gays.

My friendship with Dirk is in pieces.

Then you'll have to mend it.

Yeah.

Kintsugi.

Are you OK?

In Japan, Smos, they take a broken vase

and glue all the little pieces back together using melted gold.

And then the vase looks even better than it did before it was broken.

Yeah, maybe.

Smart guys, the Japanese, eh?

It's just a shame about the raw fish.

There. Isn't that that famous DJ? Stefan Aoki.

That is Steve Aoki. - This is your chance. Get your phone.

Hey, Steve Aoki, wait a moment, please. Steve.

Sorry... - Two seconds.

It's about Smos's number.

Um, a smos is a vegetable roll...

Sorry, Luc. I have to make up with Dirk first. That's more important.

Hey, Smos, come on. No.

Sorry, Steve Aoki. It's Dirk.

He's very gay. He was in the rug.

Do you want an egg triangle?

Why didn't you say something, before? - I didn't know.

At least, I did know but to start with... I didn't want to know.

And then I didn't dare. - Not even to me?

Yeah, Smos... - But I'm your best friend.

It's not your fault. - Yes, it is.

Of course it's my fault. I keep going on about faggots and fairies.

It must have been awful for you, in that closet for all those years.

Sorry, Dirk.

Sorry.

Right, I'd better start focusing on the job.

What? No, on Andy.

You're not going to let him get away? - A sexy hunk of male flesh like that.

Oh, sorry. I'm still finding my way. - He never wants to see me again.

You don't know that. - It doesn't matter.

I arrived with nothing and I'll have nothing when I go home later.

So... In fact I haven't lost anything.

Yes, you have, you've lost a lot. Andy is perfect for you.

Yes, and Andy knows that too.

Do you think so? - Definitely.

Andy...

I...

Before I saw you again...

I didn't know what was missing in my life. I didn't know anything was missing

in my life.

It's real strange, I admit, but I've missed you all my life,

without knowing it.

That rhymes.

As for me, I will shout from the rooftops

that I'm crazy about you.

And I will try to make it up to you.

I hope that you...

still want me.

Do you really think this makes up for anything?

I know I've hurt you. - Hurt me? Seriously, do you think so?

You'd rather accuse me of...

than admit you are gay.

I'm going to see Hilde. I'll... - Forget it.

Just stay safely in your closet.

You can shave a pheasant but that doesn't mean it can play cards.

Excuse me. - But he just wants...

I don't feel like working with him for another two days.

You can't do that. Dirk's speech was real good.

Oh yeah, and you believe it?

Do you really think he will ever shout from the rooftops that he is gay?

Yeah, right...

You did what you could, Dirk. Respect.

We are proud of you. - Never mind, Dirk...

There are plenty of other fish in the sea, buddy.

But I don't want any other fish, Luc. I want Andy.

Andy is the fish of my life. - Take it easy, Dirk.

I'm going to climb up on that stage and shout it out to the whole of Tomorrowland.

You can't, Dirk. You'll never get on there.

They'll grab you by the gonads before you've taken two steps.

I've got an idea.

It was getting dark.

Get out of there. - Hold on.

OK, we can go, we can go.

Good evening.

It's working.

Hey hey hey. Let those guys pass. What's all this?

Steve Aoki's paddleboat. - His what?

We had to bring it here for Mr. Aoki's act.

It's for crowd surfing.

There's a rubber dinghy. Throwing a paddleboat onto the audience is dangerous.

Yeah, but Steve said to bring the paddleboat...

Yeah, yeah, OK. Enough of the drivel. Come on, guys, about turn.

Luc.

Are you OK, Luc?

Go. - The heart of a tapir.

Guys, I've got a 427. I repeat, a 427.

Oh no, did someone end up under a paddleboat? Behind the main stage...

Look, Andy.

OK, Dirk, my number is ready to go.

I can't do this. I really can't.

Come on, Dirk.

Ingrid, come on. Come on.

Dirk, there are 60,000 people here waiting for you.

Sixty...

Oh, sorry, Dirk. Think of Andy. OK?

You're scared of failing. And I understand that.

But listen to my mouth, Dirk.

You shouldn't put off doing what you want to do.

Do you understand? Don't think. Feel.

You can't keep waiting for the perfect moment to arrive.

But what you can do is stand tall

and tell these 60,000 people who you really are.

There is only one Dirk Porrez. And he is a real OK guy.

You're beautiful.

People of Tomorrow...

I'm Dirk Porrez.

And I am gay!

Andy.

Andy!

Dirk.

Andy is there. There.

I choose you.

Looking back I still don't understand why I locked myself in the closet for so long.

I have friends who really care for me, who are always there for me.

I've got family who loves me.

But it took 39 years for... for me to love myself.

And now, five months later, my life has changed completely.

It has... It has become so much better.

I've thrown myself open to the world, I've thrown myself open to love.

Yeah, I... I have never been so happy.

A wise man said: open your heart.

David Hasselhoff. Learned a lot from him.

Do you want some more? - Definitely. Your glühwein is real tasty.

Do you know what my secret is?

I empty a packet of soup powder in it. To thicken it.

Right, come on, guys. Shall we drink a toast? Hey, Luc.

What?

I'd like to say something. Pre glühwein, as it were.

What? What? What? Now already? - Yes.

Andy and I have something to announce.

Not just anything. We've thought long and hard about it.

And we've both decided that today is the right moment.

Yes.

Hey.

Tiger. - OK, Spider.

Oh, buddy! Do a John Travolta, why don't you?

Take the mustache off too then.

Sorry, Dirk.