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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,543 --> 00:00:04,763 VICTOR: Dear Simon, things have been pretty tense at home 2 00:00:04,755 --> 00:00:06,795 since we learned the real reason we left Texas. 3 00:00:06,798 --> 00:00:09,338 ISABEL: No way. PILAR: What are you freaking out about this time? 4 00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:11,303 ‐ Those aren't shorts. They're denim underpants. 5 00:00:11,303 --> 00:00:13,473 ‐ People who have affairs shouldn't be throwing stones. 6 00:00:13,472 --> 00:00:16,272 ISABEL: You look like Madonna in the "Like a Prayer" video. 7 00:00:16,266 --> 00:00:19,976 ‐ Wow. That would really hurt my feelings if I actually understood your references. 8 00:00:19,978 --> 00:00:22,018 [arguing continues] VICTOR: Luckily, my family has me. 9 00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:24,822 For as long as I can remember, I've been my family's fixer. 10 00:00:24,816 --> 00:00:26,936 There's no problem I can't smooth over 11 00:00:26,944 --> 00:00:29,534 with a well‐timed joke, a charming anecdote, 12 00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:32,030 or, when all else fails... carbs. 13 00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:33,952 [indistinct arguing] Who wants pancakes? 14 00:00:34,785 --> 00:00:36,245 ‐ Oh. I could go for pancakes. 15 00:00:36,245 --> 00:00:37,245 ‐ Banana for me. 16 00:00:37,246 --> 00:00:39,666 ‐ Oh, so Victor's allowed to use the stove? 17 00:00:39,665 --> 00:00:43,085 ‐ Shh. Eat your pancakes. ‐ These smell so good, mijo. Thank you. 18 00:00:43,085 --> 00:00:44,205 ‐ You're welcome. 19 00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:46,761 ‐ Have you decided what you want to do for your birthday this Saturday? 20 00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:49,085 I thought we could throw you a party, 21 00:00:49,091 --> 00:00:50,721 invite your friends over... 22 00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:54,637 ‐ That's okay. It's such short notice. I'm sure everyone has plans, you know? 23 00:00:54,638 --> 00:00:56,968 ‐ Oh. Okay. 24 00:00:56,974 --> 00:00:59,984 I just thought we could all use a celebration around here. 25 00:00:59,977 --> 00:01:01,847 ARMANDO: Yeah, all right. See you soon, Mami. Bye. 26 00:01:01,854 --> 00:01:04,024 ‐ See you soon? Why are you gonna see her soon? 27 00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:06,532 ‐ Oh, my parents wanna visit for Victor's birthday this weekend. 28 00:01:06,525 --> 00:01:09,985 ‐ Yes! Finally! Abuelita in the house! 29 00:01:09,987 --> 00:01:12,107 ISABEL: Seriously, Armando? 30 00:01:12,114 --> 00:01:14,584 Pilar is being horrible to me, and now on top of that, 31 00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:16,365 I'm gonna have your mom here hating me? ARMANDO: Yes! 32 00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:17,658 ISABEL: I can't even‐‐ ARMANDO: What's the problem? 33 00:01:17,661 --> 00:01:19,251 ISABEL: You know what the problem is! ‐ Let's throw the party. 34 00:01:19,246 --> 00:01:22,206 ‐ Really? ‐ Yeah, yeah. It'll be fun. I mean, 35 00:01:22,207 --> 00:01:23,667 you guys can meet my friends, 36 00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:27,127 and Abuela Nati and Tito can celebrate with us. 37 00:01:27,129 --> 00:01:30,259 ‐ Our first party in our new home. Hmm? [kissing noises] 38 00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:31,797 I'm so excited. 39 00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:37,061 ‐ Okay! Party time! 40 00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:40,265 VICTOR: Maybe something fun and distracting was exactly 41 00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,807 what we needed to get our family groove back. 42 00:01:42,811 --> 00:01:44,861 ‐ That is what we're gonna do. I'm just excited about having a party 43 00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:47,015 and meeting your friends. Are they nice? I bet you they are. 44 00:01:47,024 --> 00:01:48,194 Okay, piñatas... 45 00:01:48,692 --> 00:01:51,402 ‐ ♪ Waiting for the time ♪ 46 00:01:51,403 --> 00:01:54,363 ♪ Waiting for the place ♪ 47 00:01:54,364 --> 00:01:56,704 ♪ And I, I, I ♪ 48 00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:58,700 ♪ I, I need ♪ 49 00:01:58,702 --> 00:02:01,252 ♪ Somebody to tell me it'll be all right ♪ 50 00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:04,166 ♪ Somebody to tell me it'll be just fine ♪ 51 00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:07,666 ♪ If someone has been there before, say it right now ♪ 52 00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:09,629 ♪ 'Cause I just need to hear it ♪ 53 00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:15,547 ♪ 54 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:20,845 ‐ ♪ If you get it, get it ♪ 55 00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:23,389 ‐ Yeah, of course. Of course we'll be there, right? 56 00:02:23,393 --> 00:02:25,523 ‐ Uh, depends. Who else will be there? 57 00:02:25,521 --> 00:02:28,271 An Insta‐models? Influencers? Kardashians? 58 00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:31,493 ‐ No. Just you guys, my family, and my grandparents. 59 00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:32,985 [laughs] 60 00:02:34,112 --> 00:02:36,372 ‐ Oh. Oh, you're serious. 61 00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:38,445 ‐ Victor's family is a delight. 62 00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:41,040 I like to think of myself as the third Salazar kid. 63 00:02:41,036 --> 00:02:43,326 ‐ Adrian's the third Salazar kid. 64 00:02:43,956 --> 00:02:45,326 ‐ Adrian. 65 00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:48,292 ‐ Um, this means I'm gonna meet your parents? 66 00:02:48,293 --> 00:02:49,803 ‐ Yeah. Is that cool? 67 00:02:49,795 --> 00:02:51,955 ‐ Yeah. ‐ That's awesome. 68 00:02:54,383 --> 00:02:56,683 ‐ Okay, can you guys stop gently smiling at each other? 69 00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:58,467 We have some serious business to discuss. 70 00:02:58,470 --> 00:03:01,430 Victor's party is going to blow without some more bodies. 71 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:04,642 Uh, hey, Benji. ‐ Hey. 72 00:03:04,643 --> 00:03:07,153 LAKE: Victor is having a birthday on Saturday, 73 00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:10,515 and his ratio of hot people to old people is totally tragic. 74 00:03:10,524 --> 00:03:12,114 Wanna come? 75 00:03:12,109 --> 00:03:14,779 ‐ I mean, only if you want to. There's, there's no pressure. 76 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:17,448 ‐ Sure, I'm in. I'll bring Derek. 77 00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:20,907 I mean, if that's cool. ‐ Yeah. I love Derek. 78 00:03:20,909 --> 00:03:22,619 ‐ Great. We'll be there. 79 00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,246 ‐ Hey, guys, my break's over. 80 00:03:26,248 --> 00:03:27,578 ‐ Okay. Bye. 81 00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:32,750 VICTOR: Dear Simon... ‐ Hey. 82 00:03:32,754 --> 00:03:37,014 VICTOR: ...there's going to be an actual out‐and‐proud gay couple at my house. 83 00:03:38,635 --> 00:03:41,425 Here's hoping my grandfather's gotten more... 84 00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:44,730 open‐minded, since we left Texas. 85 00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:47,385 ‐ Why are you playing with a fairy wand? 86 00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:49,614 ‐ It's my Elsa wand, from Frozen. 87 00:03:49,605 --> 00:03:53,975 It turns things into ice. Be ice, couch! 88 00:03:53,984 --> 00:03:57,204 You're ice. You're ice... ‐ Do you let him play with girls' toys? 89 00:03:57,196 --> 00:04:00,406 ‐ What? Oh, no. Uh, that's actually a, a hand‐me‐down from Pilar. 90 00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:02,657 He usually uses it to, um, to sword fight. 91 00:04:02,659 --> 00:04:04,749 Yeah, he's a very macho boy. [screeches] 92 00:04:04,745 --> 00:04:07,245 ‐ [squealing] Hi! 93 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:10,417 ‐ Tickle my back and tell me I'm guapo. ‐ Okay. 94 00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:14,417 Every day I wish your mother hadn't moved you across the country 95 00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:15,631 for no reason at all. 96 00:04:15,631 --> 00:04:19,011 ‐ Actually, there is a really good reason why we moved from Texas. 97 00:04:19,009 --> 00:04:21,389 ‐ Which is that Papi got a great new job, 98 00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:23,006 and hooked us up with this sick apartment. 99 00:04:23,013 --> 00:04:26,233 ‐ Yes, it does look a little sick. [laughs] 100 00:04:26,225 --> 00:04:28,135 ‐ Hola, Natalia. ‐ Hola. 101 00:04:28,143 --> 00:04:29,563 ISABEL: Tito, ¿cómo estás? TITO: Hola, mija. 102 00:04:29,561 --> 00:04:31,101 NATALIA: Oyeme, Victor. 103 00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:33,774 What would you like me to make you for your birthday? 104 00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:36,744 Buñuelos, or Pasteles de Gloria? 105 00:04:36,735 --> 00:04:41,525 ‐ Actually, I'm gonna be making a tres leches cake, just like yours. 106 00:04:41,532 --> 00:04:44,332 ‐ Oh. We'll see about that. 107 00:04:44,326 --> 00:04:46,746 I thought you were joking on the phone. 108 00:04:46,745 --> 00:04:48,405 Is she really baking? 109 00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:51,383 ‐ Abuela, did Papi tell you? 110 00:04:51,375 --> 00:04:53,125 My new friends are coming to the party. 111 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:54,876 ‐ [gasps] Oh! ARMANDO: Oh, yeah. That's right. 112 00:04:54,878 --> 00:04:57,338 We're all gonna get to meet the mystery girl that Victor's been dating. 113 00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:00,425 ‐ Oh, so Victor finally has a novia, huh? 114 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:02,215 ‐ Si. [chuckles] 115 00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:06,599 ‐ At least one of your boys is gonna give me some great‐grandchildren. 116 00:05:06,598 --> 00:05:10,098 ADRIAN: Ice power! Ice! Ice! Ice! 117 00:05:10,102 --> 00:05:12,062 Be ice, couch! 118 00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:15,400 ‐ It's too much eyeliner. 119 00:05:15,399 --> 00:05:17,109 Okay, I need makeup that says, 120 00:05:17,109 --> 00:05:18,939 "Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Salazar. 121 00:05:18,944 --> 00:05:21,864 I'm Mia, a perfectly respectable girl for your son to date." 122 00:05:21,864 --> 00:05:23,284 ‐ This totally says that, 123 00:05:23,282 --> 00:05:25,702 while also hinting that you have a wild side. 124 00:05:25,701 --> 00:05:28,251 If they really love their son, they'll want that for him. 125 00:05:28,245 --> 00:05:29,365 [Mia groans] 126 00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:30,831 Why are you so stressed about this? 127 00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:32,251 ‐ I guess... 128 00:05:32,249 --> 00:05:34,379 Victor's family is like, his whole world, 129 00:05:34,376 --> 00:05:37,126 and he's becoming a big part of my world, 130 00:05:37,129 --> 00:05:39,419 so I just need them to like me. 131 00:05:39,423 --> 00:05:42,513 ‐ My God, you're like, next level into him, aren't you? 132 00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:44,679 ‐ No, I'm‐‐ Maybe. I don't know. Stop. 133 00:05:44,678 --> 00:05:47,218 ‐ I wish I had a super sweet, super cute boy 134 00:05:47,222 --> 00:05:48,972 who wanted to parade me around. 135 00:05:48,974 --> 00:05:51,064 ‐ Oh, are you still bummed it didn't work out with Andrew? 136 00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:54,189 ‐ Oh, no. No, I'm over that. 137 00:05:54,188 --> 00:05:58,108 Andrew's just as blah as all the other guys at Creekwood. 138 00:05:58,108 --> 00:06:00,858 I want someone exciting. And spontaneous. 139 00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:04,281 The kind of guy who isn't afraid to do something crazy and unexpected, 140 00:06:04,281 --> 00:06:07,491 like rob a bank. ‐ So, a criminal. 141 00:06:08,118 --> 00:06:09,748 ‐ It's not a crime if you don't get caught. 142 00:06:09,745 --> 00:06:11,955 ‐ Mm, that's not at all how it works. 143 00:06:12,956 --> 00:06:14,626 Do you really think Victor's parents will like me? 144 00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:17,035 ‐ They will love you. You're a parents' wet dream. 145 00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:19,514 ‐ And mostly because I don't say things like that. 146 00:06:24,134 --> 00:06:26,724 [soccer game playing on TV] [Tito cheering] 147 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:28,680 [all yelling and cheering] 148 00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:31,683 ‐ Oh! 149 00:06:31,683 --> 00:06:33,483 [doorbell rings] 150 00:06:33,477 --> 00:06:35,187 ‐ I'll get it, I'll get it, I'll get it. 151 00:06:35,938 --> 00:06:37,438 FELIX: Sports... 152 00:06:38,982 --> 00:06:40,612 MIA and LAKE: Happy birthday! ‐ Hey, guys. 153 00:06:40,609 --> 00:06:42,989 Thanks for coming. You look really nice. 154 00:06:42,986 --> 00:06:43,946 [laughs] ‐ Right? 155 00:06:43,946 --> 00:06:46,656 And the craziest part is she didn't even think about the way she looked. 156 00:06:46,657 --> 00:06:48,027 ‐ Yeah. ‐ No, it didn't cross her mind. 157 00:06:48,033 --> 00:06:49,283 ‐ Shut up. 158 00:06:49,284 --> 00:06:50,954 ‐ The other guys‐‐ Oh, hey. 159 00:06:50,953 --> 00:06:52,503 ‐ This is Lake and Mia. 160 00:06:52,496 --> 00:06:54,496 ‐ Oh. ‐ Nice to meet you both. 161 00:06:54,498 --> 00:06:56,378 Which one are you dating? 162 00:06:56,375 --> 00:06:58,665 ‐ [exhales] Sorry. Mia. 163 00:06:58,669 --> 00:07:01,259 ‐ Oh. Ay, otra vez, otra vez. ‐ No! 164 00:07:01,255 --> 00:07:03,545 ‐ Come on. Wait, they were totally off‐sides. 165 00:07:03,549 --> 00:07:06,089 ‐ Yes, thank you! ‐ Me encanta esta niña. 166 00:07:06,093 --> 00:07:08,183 ‐ Yeah, I don't know how you tricked her into going out with you, 167 00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:10,218 but, uh, do not screw it up. [Victor laughing] 168 00:07:10,806 --> 00:07:12,466 ‐ I'll try not to, Papi. 169 00:07:12,474 --> 00:07:14,394 ‐ Oh, uh, should I meet your mom? 170 00:07:14,393 --> 00:07:16,563 ‐ Yeah, yeah, yeah. That'd be great. 171 00:07:17,813 --> 00:07:21,943 ‐ Great mustache, by the way. ‐ Thank you. [chuckles] 172 00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:27,454 VICTOR: Well, Simon, looks like the fixer's done it again. 173 00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:31,197 I hadn't seen my dad smile in days. 174 00:07:31,201 --> 00:07:33,161 Until he met Mia. 175 00:07:33,161 --> 00:07:34,661 ISABEL: You have got to be kidding me. 176 00:07:34,663 --> 00:07:35,913 You are not wearing that to this party. 177 00:07:35,914 --> 00:07:38,504 ‐ What? This is my house. I can wear what I want in my house. 178 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,040 ‐ No, you can't. 179 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:42,963 Because I can't have your abuela giving me another lecture 180 00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:44,843 on how I let you listen to devil music. 181 00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:47,470 Now please, go to your room and change, 182 00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:50,097 before she finishes putting on her makeup and sees you. 183 00:07:50,095 --> 00:07:52,675 ‐ Fine. I'll go to my room, but I'm not coming to this stupid party 184 00:07:52,681 --> 00:07:54,681 just so we can all pretend we're still a happy family. 185 00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,563 ‐ Pilar! [door closes] 186 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:57,690 [sighs] 187 00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:58,596 [clears throat] 188 00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:02,728 ‐ Uh, Mom, this is... this is Mia. 189 00:08:02,733 --> 00:08:06,033 ‐ Hi. ‐ Hello. I'm sorry you had to see that. 190 00:08:06,028 --> 00:08:07,488 ‐ No, it's fine. 191 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:11,577 My mom and I had a pretty terrible relationship sometimes, too. 192 00:08:11,575 --> 00:08:14,825 ‐ We don't have a terrible relationship. We just had a fight. 193 00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:17,118 ‐ No, of course. I, um, I‐‐ [clattering] 194 00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:19,502 I meant, um, I don't know. 195 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:20,629 I don't know what I meant. [Victor chuckles] 196 00:08:22,961 --> 00:08:27,051 Wow. You really do not look like you could have a 16‐year‐old son, 197 00:08:27,049 --> 00:08:28,179 Mrs. Salazar. 198 00:08:28,175 --> 00:08:29,635 ‐ You speak Spanish. 199 00:08:29,635 --> 00:08:33,845 ‐ A little. Uh, my dad used to teach summer sessions in Barcelona. 200 00:08:34,515 --> 00:08:36,885 ‐ Mia has traveled all over. [chuckles] 201 00:08:40,521 --> 00:08:44,531 ‐ Mia, may I have a moment alone with my son, please? 202 00:08:49,488 --> 00:08:51,988 ‐ She's nice, right? ‐ Yeah. Yeah, she seems great, 203 00:08:51,990 --> 00:08:53,830 but we have a major emergency on our hands. 204 00:08:53,825 --> 00:08:55,485 I need to get another tres leches cake. 205 00:08:55,494 --> 00:08:57,334 ‐ What? Why? 206 00:08:57,329 --> 00:08:59,539 ‐ I forgot to get the third leche, 207 00:08:59,540 --> 00:09:02,080 so I doubled up on the second leche, thinking you wouldn't be able to tell, 208 00:09:02,084 --> 00:09:04,844 but you can tell, Victor. You can totally tell! 209 00:09:04,837 --> 00:09:06,377 And if I don't fix this, 210 00:09:06,380 --> 00:09:09,380 I am gonna be hearing about how I tanked tres leches cake 211 00:09:09,383 --> 00:09:10,883 from your abuela until she is dead. 212 00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:12,684 Which might be today, because I'm gonna murder her 213 00:09:12,678 --> 00:09:14,258 for giving me so much crap about the cake. 214 00:09:14,263 --> 00:09:16,063 ‐ It's fine. It's fine. 215 00:09:16,515 --> 00:09:19,265 Listen, scrap that cake. I'll get a new one, 216 00:09:19,268 --> 00:09:22,188 and abuela will never have to know. Okay? Come here. 217 00:09:22,187 --> 00:09:24,977 ‐ Okay. Ay, mi vida. 218 00:09:24,982 --> 00:09:27,572 You're always saving the day. 219 00:09:27,568 --> 00:09:29,278 Okay. Ay. 220 00:09:29,778 --> 00:09:32,318 VICTOR: Lake, would you be able to do me a huge favor 221 00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:34,952 and run to the Mexican bakery and pick up a tres leches cake? 222 00:09:34,950 --> 00:09:37,290 ‐ Oh‐‐ ‐ I'll come with you. 223 00:09:37,286 --> 00:09:40,156 Uh, Victor's grandfather said I'm no longer allowed to follow him around 224 00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:42,673 with Google translate, so... 225 00:09:42,666 --> 00:09:45,286 ‐ [sighs] Fine, we'll go. Just don't be weird. 226 00:09:45,294 --> 00:09:48,214 ‐ [with cockney accent] Oh. I wouldn't dream of it, m'lady. 227 00:09:48,714 --> 00:09:50,134 ‐ And you failed. 228 00:09:53,302 --> 00:09:54,762 [Lake sighs] 229 00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:58,520 'Course I have to leave when the one sexy person shows up. 230 00:09:59,308 --> 00:10:01,268 No offense, Victor! 231 00:10:02,186 --> 00:10:03,976 ‐ Hey, Benji. 232 00:10:03,979 --> 00:10:06,109 You made it. ‐ Hey. 233 00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:09,233 A little something for the birthday boy. [chuckles] 234 00:10:09,234 --> 00:10:10,824 ‐ You didn't have to get me a gift. 235 00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:14,070 ‐ I had to park in front of a hydrant. 236 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:16,032 So nobody set anything on fire. 237 00:10:16,033 --> 00:10:17,913 ‐ [laughs] Hey, man. Thanks for coming. 238 00:10:17,910 --> 00:10:20,080 ‐ Yeah. Anything this guy wants. 239 00:10:20,078 --> 00:10:21,368 TITO: Victor. 240 00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:23,372 Who are your friends? 241 00:10:23,373 --> 00:10:26,253 ‐ Uh, oh, Tito, this is Benji, my coworker, 242 00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:29,921 and Derek, his, uh, band mate. [chuckles] 243 00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:32,967 TITO: Ah, ¿como los Bee Gees? ‐ Si. [chuckles] 244 00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:39,313 ‐ Seriously? "His band mate?" 245 00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:41,016 ‐ Well, you guys are in a band together. 246 00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:42,766 ‐ Yeah, well, I prefer the term "boyfriend." 247 00:10:42,768 --> 00:10:44,558 ‐ No, no, of course. It's just‐‐ 248 00:10:46,021 --> 00:10:49,781 My family's going through a hard time right now. 249 00:10:49,775 --> 00:10:51,605 I just really need today to go well, 250 00:10:51,610 --> 00:10:52,950 and if my grandfather makes a scene, 251 00:10:52,945 --> 00:10:55,485 it'll lead to a fight between my parents, and I just... 252 00:10:56,782 --> 00:10:59,702 I'm just not sure how much more fighting we can take. 253 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:04,461 ‐ Whatever. Just... forget about it. 254 00:11:10,087 --> 00:11:12,007 [indistinct chatter] 255 00:11:19,847 --> 00:11:22,387 ‐ Hola. We need your biggest tres leches cake. 256 00:11:22,391 --> 00:11:26,901 ‐ Si. Es una cake emergencia. 257 00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:30,435 ‐ Look, as much as it pains me not to help out two flustered kids 258 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,030 with their cake... "emergencia," 259 00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:36,356 this is the last one I got, and I just sold it to that guy. 260 00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:40,328 ‐ Okay. Let me handle this. 261 00:11:40,325 --> 00:11:42,995 [sighs] Hello, sir. 262 00:11:42,995 --> 00:11:46,415 Uh, you seemed to have gotten the last tres leches cake, 263 00:11:46,415 --> 00:11:48,825 and I was hoping to buy it from you. 264 00:11:49,793 --> 00:11:53,173 ‐ Look, I'd love to help, but it's an apology cake for my wife. 265 00:11:53,172 --> 00:11:56,972 I called her sister "shrill" and then tried to defend my point. 266 00:11:56,967 --> 00:11:58,297 Way to go, Jeff. 267 00:11:58,302 --> 00:11:59,262 ‐ Sir. 268 00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:09,149 ‐ Hi. Sir, uh, today is my best friend Victor's birthday. 269 00:12:09,146 --> 00:12:11,686 This cake is his favorite dessert in the whole wide world. 270 00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:14,900 So, is there any chance you'd be willing to take a different cake? 271 00:12:15,319 --> 00:12:16,489 ‐ No. 272 00:12:16,486 --> 00:12:19,486 ‐ Well, I'm, uh, I'm sorry you feel that way. 273 00:12:19,489 --> 00:12:22,239 [change clatters] Lake, run. I said run! Go, go, go! 274 00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,202 LAKE: Felix, what are you doing? FELIX: Hurry, hurry! 275 00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:31,174 ‐ And my dad is president of a university. ‐ Oh, wow! 276 00:12:31,168 --> 00:12:33,128 Que fancy. 277 00:12:33,128 --> 00:12:35,588 You really struck the jackpot, niño. 278 00:12:35,589 --> 00:12:39,969 Isabel, did you know that Mia used to summer in Barcelona? 279 00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:41,178 ‐ So I've heard. 280 00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:43,352 [soccer game playing on TV] 281 00:12:45,057 --> 00:12:46,807 ‐ Excuse me. 282 00:12:46,808 --> 00:12:48,388 [distant metal music playing] 283 00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,193 ‐ No, no. Not today. 284 00:12:50,187 --> 00:12:52,357 [screaming] Not today, Pilar! 285 00:12:52,356 --> 00:12:55,106 ‐ Why do you let her play that devil music in your house? 286 00:12:56,068 --> 00:12:58,988 ‐ I just screamed, "Not today, Pilar." 287 00:12:58,987 --> 00:13:00,737 ‐ It is her brother's birthday, 288 00:13:00,739 --> 00:13:03,369 and you can't even get her to come out of her room? 289 00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:07,002 ‐ Well, I could go talk to her, if you want. 290 00:13:07,621 --> 00:13:09,871 ‐ Sure. Have at it. 291 00:13:12,209 --> 00:13:14,959 TITO: Do you get paid? ‐ Just in tips and free bar nuts. 292 00:13:14,962 --> 00:13:16,592 [chuckles] 293 00:13:16,588 --> 00:13:18,588 ‐ I bet you guys are cleaning up with the ladies. 294 00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:21,260 DEREK: [laughing] Uh, no. Not really. 295 00:13:22,094 --> 00:13:24,304 Actually, we are‐‐ ‐ Too busy. 296 00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:27,524 Between music and school, 297 00:13:27,516 --> 00:13:29,346 who has the time to date? 298 00:13:32,229 --> 00:13:33,559 ‐ I'm gonna get my drink. 299 00:13:33,564 --> 00:13:34,694 ‐ Hey. ‐ Hmm? 300 00:13:34,690 --> 00:13:37,530 TITO: Have you ever heard of Frank Sinatra? Now that's music. 301 00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:42,070 ‐ Y‐you didn't have to do that. 302 00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:50,251 ‐ I'm wearing heels! ‐ Come on! 303 00:13:53,584 --> 00:13:56,004 ‐ I cannot believe you did that. It was like, straight out of a movie! 304 00:13:56,003 --> 00:13:57,923 ‐ I know. We were like Bonnie and Clyde. 305 00:13:57,921 --> 00:14:02,051 But seriously, though, I think my heart is going to explode. Here. Feel. 306 00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:03,050 [sighs] 307 00:14:08,932 --> 00:14:12,392 ‐ Um, okay, well, it looks like the coast is clear, 308 00:14:12,394 --> 00:14:14,734 so we should probably get back to the party, 309 00:14:14,730 --> 00:14:17,230 and pray there are more guests. 310 00:14:17,232 --> 00:14:20,692 I'm on the prowl for a spontaneous hottie, so... 311 00:14:27,242 --> 00:14:29,752 [metal music blasting] 312 00:14:30,537 --> 00:14:32,207 ‐ She sent you in here? 313 00:14:32,789 --> 00:14:35,789 Coward. ‐ Uh, actually, I volunteered. 314 00:14:36,752 --> 00:14:39,252 Do you mind if I turn this... [music stops] 315 00:14:39,254 --> 00:14:40,764 So, um, Victor... 316 00:14:41,465 --> 00:14:44,335 told me what happened with your mom and dad. 317 00:14:45,093 --> 00:14:46,763 Yeah. I'm sorry, Pilar. 318 00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:53,310 I know it's not the same, but... 319 00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:55,600 when my parents started going through their shit, 320 00:14:55,604 --> 00:14:58,944 uh, let's just say there wasn't enough angry music in the world 321 00:14:58,941 --> 00:15:01,321 that would have made me feel better. ‐ Yeah. 322 00:15:03,862 --> 00:15:07,412 This thing my mom did back in Texas... 323 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:10,368 ...it ruined everything. 324 00:15:11,703 --> 00:15:14,413 I mean, my family's always been lame. 325 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:19,502 But before this, we were kind of happy. 326 00:15:19,503 --> 00:15:21,213 ‐ It's pretty terrible, isn't it? 327 00:15:22,714 --> 00:15:25,474 When you realize your parents 328 00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:27,717 don't actually have it all together. 329 00:15:27,719 --> 00:15:30,559 That they're actually just pretending 330 00:15:30,556 --> 00:15:32,806 they know what they're doing for our sake. 331 00:15:32,808 --> 00:15:35,728 Well, the good ones bother pretending. 332 00:15:35,727 --> 00:15:38,017 My mom didn't. 333 00:15:41,775 --> 00:15:42,895 Hmm. 334 00:15:45,779 --> 00:15:48,409 [game playing on TV] [laughter, chatting] 335 00:15:48,407 --> 00:15:51,197 DEREK: Can we just go, please? BENJI: Come on. It's his birthday. 336 00:15:51,201 --> 00:15:53,791 DEREK: I don't care. Benji, I'm not pretending to be straight 337 00:15:53,787 --> 00:15:55,327 for some homophobic old man. 338 00:15:55,330 --> 00:15:57,710 BENJI: Can you not right now? 339 00:15:57,708 --> 00:15:59,328 [sighs] God. 340 00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:01,504 [phone dings] 341 00:16:01,503 --> 00:16:02,963 SIMON: Dear Victor, 342 00:16:02,963 --> 00:16:05,673 sounds like your family is very lucky to have you. 343 00:16:05,674 --> 00:16:09,394 I wish I had a pancake‐making fixer in my life. 344 00:16:09,386 --> 00:16:10,796 One thing, though. 345 00:16:10,804 --> 00:16:14,104 Your messages have all been about things going smoothly for your family, 346 00:16:14,099 --> 00:16:17,309 and not for you. But you're dealing with a lot, Victor. 347 00:16:17,311 --> 00:16:19,611 Your conservative grandfather. 348 00:16:19,605 --> 00:16:23,395 Mia meeting your parents. Benji in your house with his boyfriend. 349 00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:25,987 I guess what I'm saying is, 350 00:16:25,986 --> 00:16:29,816 sometimes it's easier to focus on fixing other people 351 00:16:29,823 --> 00:16:31,703 than on your own stuff. 352 00:16:31,700 --> 00:16:34,580 ‐ Look, it just made me feel uncomfortable. 353 00:16:34,578 --> 00:16:38,208 ‐ I know. I'm sorry. Okay? 354 00:16:38,874 --> 00:16:40,174 ‐ Okay. 355 00:16:48,717 --> 00:16:51,967 ‐ I don't want to fight anymore, okay? ‐ Same. 356 00:16:59,561 --> 00:17:00,731 [exhales sharply] 357 00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:04,570 ‐ Hey. Where are we on the cake? 358 00:17:04,566 --> 00:17:06,816 ‐ Uh, Felix texted. It's on the way. 359 00:17:07,736 --> 00:17:10,026 ‐ Um, I just talked to Pilar. 360 00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:12,160 I think maybe she might join the party soon. 361 00:17:12,157 --> 00:17:14,197 ‐ That's awesome. Thank you. 362 00:17:14,952 --> 00:17:16,412 ‐ Yes, thanks. 363 00:17:16,411 --> 00:17:20,041 ‐ No problem. I just talked to her. [chuckles] 364 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,380 One angsty teen girl to another. 365 00:17:22,376 --> 00:17:23,706 [chuckling] 366 00:17:27,256 --> 00:17:31,426 Is your mom always so, um... so prickly? 367 00:17:32,511 --> 00:17:35,221 ‐ I'm sorry. She's having a bad day. 368 00:17:35,222 --> 00:17:36,972 ‐ Hey, Victor, a word? 369 00:17:36,974 --> 00:17:38,314 ‐ Uh, yeah. 370 00:17:43,730 --> 00:17:46,190 Hey. Is everything okay? 371 00:17:46,191 --> 00:17:50,571 ‐ Tito just saw your two friends, the, uh, guys in the band, kissing. 372 00:17:52,114 --> 00:17:53,414 ‐ Uh... 373 00:17:55,826 --> 00:17:58,536 That's because... 374 00:17:58,537 --> 00:18:01,287 they're... together. 375 00:18:02,499 --> 00:18:04,919 ‐ You need to tell them not to do that here. 376 00:18:04,918 --> 00:18:06,838 What if your little brother sees them? 377 00:18:09,673 --> 00:18:11,973 ‐ Victor, just... please. It's a family party. 378 00:18:15,888 --> 00:18:17,308 [whispers] Please, son. 379 00:18:23,020 --> 00:18:25,810 ♪ 380 00:18:29,818 --> 00:18:31,198 ‐ No! 381 00:18:32,321 --> 00:18:36,121 I'm sorry, Papi. I really wanted today to go smoothly, but... 382 00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:38,036 those are my friends. 383 00:18:38,035 --> 00:18:40,655 I'm not gonna tell them not to be who they are if that bothers you. 384 00:18:40,662 --> 00:18:43,542 That's your problem. Not theirs, and not mine. 385 00:18:44,499 --> 00:18:48,129 ‐ This is how you teach your son to speak to his abuelo? 386 00:18:51,089 --> 00:18:53,219 ‐ Yeah. It is. 387 00:18:53,217 --> 00:18:54,927 I raised him to be true to himself, 388 00:18:54,927 --> 00:18:57,467 and to stand up for the people that he cares about. 389 00:18:57,471 --> 00:19:01,021 And since we're being true to ourselves, 390 00:19:01,016 --> 00:19:03,766 my tres leches cake was garbage, so I threw it out. 391 00:19:04,561 --> 00:19:07,231 Not that it would have impressed you, anyway. 392 00:19:07,231 --> 00:19:09,651 I do my best, Natalia, every day. 393 00:19:09,650 --> 00:19:13,200 That's all I can do, and I am sorry if it is not enough. 394 00:19:13,195 --> 00:19:15,275 ‐ No, no. It's more than enough. 395 00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:17,370 Isabel is amazing, 396 00:19:17,366 --> 00:19:20,906 and she's raising our kids to be good, decent people. 397 00:19:23,121 --> 00:19:24,831 You need to give her a break. 398 00:19:25,666 --> 00:19:27,706 ‐ Lo siento, pero... 399 00:19:28,710 --> 00:19:30,630 It's hard for us, that's all. 400 00:19:30,963 --> 00:19:32,633 Everything is changing. 401 00:19:32,631 --> 00:19:35,261 This is not the world we grew up in. 402 00:19:35,259 --> 00:19:38,599 Our grandkids can barely speak Spanish. 403 00:19:38,595 --> 00:19:42,465 ‐ Boys kissing boys instead of girls? 404 00:19:42,474 --> 00:19:45,944 NATALIA: It seems like everything that matters to us 405 00:19:45,936 --> 00:19:47,266 is disappearing. 406 00:19:47,896 --> 00:19:49,976 Including you, mijo. 407 00:19:49,982 --> 00:19:54,072 We just don't understand why you had to move so far away. 408 00:19:54,069 --> 00:19:55,739 ‐ I can tell you why. 409 00:19:56,405 --> 00:19:58,275 ‐ Pilar, please. 410 00:20:02,035 --> 00:20:03,655 ‐ It was better for our family. 411 00:20:04,329 --> 00:20:06,749 You, of all people, should understand that. 412 00:20:06,748 --> 00:20:08,668 That's why you left Colombia. 413 00:20:10,794 --> 00:20:14,424 ♪ 414 00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:20,010 ADRIAN: ♪ Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you ♪ 415 00:20:20,012 --> 00:20:21,562 Ice! [pretend groaning] 416 00:20:21,555 --> 00:20:23,965 [all laughing] Ice! 417 00:20:23,974 --> 00:20:26,444 ‐ Oh, come on, Dad. Do us! ‐ Do us, do us! 418 00:20:26,435 --> 00:20:28,185 ADRIAN: Ice! Ice! ARMANDO: I'm melting! 419 00:20:28,187 --> 00:20:30,147 I'm melting. ‐ Come on! 420 00:20:30,147 --> 00:20:31,647 ‐ I got your power! 421 00:20:31,648 --> 00:20:35,938 Ice! Ice! Ice! Ice! Ice! Ice! [all chattering, laughing] 422 00:20:35,944 --> 00:20:38,454 I'm freezing everybody! [exclaims] 423 00:20:38,447 --> 00:20:41,777 NATALIA: [laughing] He got me! ‐ Aah! I got you! 424 00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:45,196 [distant yelling, laughing] 425 00:20:45,954 --> 00:20:49,714 MIA: [sighs] I thought you could, uh, use some help. 426 00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:53,340 ‐ Thank you. ‐ Yeah. 427 00:20:56,173 --> 00:20:58,093 I don't know what I'm doing. 428 00:20:58,884 --> 00:21:02,764 Um, it's, it's been a while since I've been around, 429 00:21:02,763 --> 00:21:04,643 you know, a mom. 430 00:21:06,850 --> 00:21:09,900 Being around you, uh, 431 00:21:09,895 --> 00:21:12,055 it's hard for me. 432 00:21:12,064 --> 00:21:14,824 Because it reminds me of what I've lost. 433 00:21:15,734 --> 00:21:19,704 But you're Victor's favorite person, so I've been trying to push past that, 434 00:21:19,696 --> 00:21:24,486 and make a good impression for him. 435 00:21:27,079 --> 00:21:30,419 So, um, yeah. That's all. 436 00:21:32,334 --> 00:21:34,464 ‐ [laughs softly] Do you know... 437 00:21:36,046 --> 00:21:38,046 It's funny, isn't it? 438 00:21:39,883 --> 00:21:42,723 I swore to myself a thousand times 439 00:21:42,719 --> 00:21:46,469 that I would never, ever be like my mother‐in‐law. 440 00:21:47,432 --> 00:21:52,102 And then my son brings home his first girlfriend, and... 441 00:21:52,104 --> 00:21:53,904 I'm cold as ice. 442 00:21:54,940 --> 00:21:55,900 I know... 443 00:21:55,899 --> 00:21:58,029 [laughing] Mothers and their sons. 444 00:21:58,026 --> 00:22:00,896 We love them so much, no one else stands a chance. 445 00:22:02,823 --> 00:22:04,163 Thank you. 446 00:22:05,033 --> 00:22:07,543 For talking to Pilar. 447 00:22:07,536 --> 00:22:09,496 ‐ It was my pleasure, Mrs. Salazar. 448 00:22:10,831 --> 00:22:13,541 ‐ You know what? You can just call me Isabel. 449 00:22:13,542 --> 00:22:15,502 ‐ Um, yeah. Isa‐‐ Okay. Isabel. 450 00:22:15,502 --> 00:22:17,342 ‐ [laughs] Great. 451 00:22:19,214 --> 00:22:20,674 ‐ We're gonna head out. 452 00:22:21,466 --> 00:22:24,926 Derek turns into a pumpkin if he's not watching reality TV by 10:00. 453 00:22:24,928 --> 00:22:26,468 [both chuckle softly] 454 00:22:26,930 --> 00:22:28,930 ‐ I, I'm sorry, Benji. 455 00:22:30,559 --> 00:22:32,849 ‐ Coming out was really hard for me, Victor. 456 00:22:32,853 --> 00:22:35,113 And it's still hard for me to be who I am. 457 00:22:37,232 --> 00:22:40,152 ‐ I know. And for the record, 458 00:22:40,152 --> 00:22:42,912 I think who you are is, is pretty great. 459 00:22:45,616 --> 00:22:47,366 ‐ I hope you like my present. 460 00:22:47,367 --> 00:22:48,867 ISABEL: Hey, everybody. Cake time! 461 00:22:48,869 --> 00:22:51,209 [excited chattering] 462 00:22:51,205 --> 00:22:54,825 ALL: ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 463 00:22:54,833 --> 00:22:58,303 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 464 00:22:58,295 --> 00:23:02,795 ♪ Happy birthday, dear Victor ♪ 465 00:23:02,799 --> 00:23:06,969 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ [inaudible dialogue] 466 00:23:06,970 --> 00:23:08,430 ‐ Come on, Victor. Make a wish. 467 00:23:14,436 --> 00:23:15,596 [blows] 468 00:23:15,604 --> 00:23:17,944 [all cheering and clapping] 469 00:23:23,737 --> 00:23:25,237 FELIX: Happy birthday, man. 470 00:23:29,034 --> 00:23:30,874 ‐ Hey. ‐ Hey. 471 00:23:32,454 --> 00:23:34,714 [both laugh] ‐ What? 472 00:23:35,707 --> 00:23:37,377 ‐ Thank you for today. 473 00:23:37,376 --> 00:23:41,916 For trying so hard with my little sister, and my mom. 474 00:23:41,922 --> 00:23:44,052 ‐ Of course. 475 00:23:44,049 --> 00:23:45,679 That's what girlfriends do. 476 00:23:46,802 --> 00:23:49,352 I mean, not that, not that I'm your... 477 00:23:49,972 --> 00:23:53,062 Oh, my God. Okay, I am just gonna go stuff my mouth with cake, 478 00:23:53,058 --> 00:23:55,348 so that I can't talk. ‐ Mia, stop. 479 00:23:57,771 --> 00:24:00,571 Of course you're my girlfriend. 480 00:24:02,693 --> 00:24:07,033 ‐ Thank God. That was almost really embarrassing. 481 00:24:11,952 --> 00:24:13,912 [both laugh softly] 482 00:24:18,667 --> 00:24:20,377 ‐ Um, cake? ‐ Cake, yeah. 483 00:24:20,377 --> 00:24:22,297 ‐ Yeah, cake. [both laugh] 484 00:24:22,296 --> 00:24:24,966 VICTOR: Dear Simon, against the odds, 485 00:24:24,965 --> 00:24:28,045 I think my party actually brought my family closer together. 486 00:24:28,844 --> 00:24:31,814 But you might be right. 487 00:24:31,805 --> 00:24:35,675 Focusing on their problems is way easier than focusing on my own. 488 00:24:41,273 --> 00:24:44,033 My brother asked me to make wish tonight, and... 489 00:24:45,903 --> 00:24:49,533 I didn't even know how to put what I want into words. 490 00:24:53,285 --> 00:24:55,285 But I guess if I had to try, 491 00:24:57,331 --> 00:25:00,711 I wish that 16 will be the year 492 00:25:00,709 --> 00:25:02,749 I finally figure out what I want. 493 00:25:02,753 --> 00:25:05,013 [knocking on door] 494 00:25:05,005 --> 00:25:06,295 ‐ Hey, flaco. ‐ Hey. 495 00:25:06,298 --> 00:25:08,878 ‐ Can we talk? ‐ Uh, yeah. Yeah, sure. 496 00:25:10,552 --> 00:25:13,682 ‐ Um, the way you spoke to Tito at the party‐‐ 497 00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:14,930 ‐ I, I'm sorry. 498 00:25:15,724 --> 00:25:17,184 I didn't mean to raise my voice. 499 00:25:17,184 --> 00:25:18,564 ‐ Oh, no. No, no. 500 00:25:19,686 --> 00:25:22,726 I should be saying sorry. Um... 501 00:25:22,731 --> 00:25:26,031 I'm proud of you for standing up to him. 502 00:25:26,026 --> 00:25:29,066 Uh, I was never great at that. 503 00:25:30,030 --> 00:25:33,160 You know, when I was a kid, he was hard on me. 504 00:25:33,158 --> 00:25:36,448 It was always, "Do better in school. Run faster in soccer." 505 00:25:36,453 --> 00:25:39,253 I was always so desperate for his approval. 506 00:25:40,207 --> 00:25:42,457 I still am. 507 00:25:42,459 --> 00:25:44,669 Anyway, um, 508 00:25:44,670 --> 00:25:47,710 what you said about those boys, 509 00:25:47,714 --> 00:25:49,514 you were brave, 510 00:25:49,508 --> 00:25:51,298 and, uh, I agree. 511 00:25:51,969 --> 00:25:54,929 It's their lives. They can do what they want. 512 00:25:54,930 --> 00:25:56,810 ‐ Really? ‐ Yeah. 513 00:25:56,807 --> 00:26:01,187 ‐ I mean, I guess I just never knew how you felt about... that. 514 00:26:01,186 --> 00:26:04,306 ‐ What business is it of mine what some boys in your school are up to? 515 00:26:04,898 --> 00:26:06,018 Right? ‐ Yeah. 516 00:26:06,024 --> 00:26:07,484 [Armando chuckles] 517 00:26:08,777 --> 00:26:10,527 ‐ I just hope that Tito's wrong, 518 00:26:10,529 --> 00:26:12,869 and your little brother doesn't turn out that way. 519 00:26:13,657 --> 00:26:16,197 Anyway, I love you. Happy birthday, mijo. 520 00:26:16,201 --> 00:26:17,791 ‐ Love you, too. 521 00:26:17,786 --> 00:26:20,076 ♪ "Time" by Colouring ♪ 522 00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:21,210 [door closes] 523 00:26:21,206 --> 00:26:23,416 ‐ ♪ Time it takes to break my heart ♪ 524 00:26:23,417 --> 00:26:25,747 ♪ If only I could figure out ♪ 525 00:26:25,752 --> 00:26:29,592 ♪ Time it takes to make your mark when the minutes running out ♪ 526 00:26:31,008 --> 00:26:33,218 ♪ Oh I can't sleep at night ♪ 527 00:26:33,218 --> 00:26:35,428 ♪ Every second counts ♪ 528 00:26:35,429 --> 00:26:39,679 ♪ Holding the wheel so tight, are we breaking down ♪ 529 00:26:39,683 --> 00:26:44,233 ♪ I never thought I would want us to turn back 'round ♪ 530 00:26:44,229 --> 00:26:46,019 ♪ Am I out of time ♪ 531 00:26:46,023 --> 00:26:50,073 ♪ Just give me more time ♪ 532 00:26:50,527 --> 00:26:52,447 ♪ Just give me more time ♪ 41589

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