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♪ "If I Can't Have You"
by Shawn Mendes ♪
2
00:00:03,462 --> 00:00:06,422
SIMON: Dear Victor,
Benji has a boyfriend?
3
00:00:06,423 --> 00:00:07,883
That sucks.
4
00:00:07,883 --> 00:00:10,303
Before I was out, I was devastated
5
00:00:10,302 --> 00:00:12,932
when my fake celebrity crush,
Gigi Hadid,
6
00:00:12,930 --> 00:00:15,850
started dating
my real celebrity crush, Zayn.
7
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:18,059
I'm still not totally over it.
8
00:00:18,060 --> 00:00:19,650
How are you holding up?
9
00:00:19,645 --> 00:00:21,975
VICTOR:
Honestly, Simon,
10
00:00:21,980 --> 00:00:23,610
I'm fine.
11
00:00:23,607 --> 00:00:25,477
Things with Benji are great.
12
00:00:25,484 --> 00:00:27,444
Hey, Benji, can you open the‐‐
13
00:00:27,444 --> 00:00:29,074
and hand me the‐‐
14
00:00:29,071 --> 00:00:30,951
I also need the‐‐
15
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,043
[cell phone beeping]
16
00:00:36,203 --> 00:00:37,703
‐ Hey, handsome. What's up?
17
00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:39,084
VICTOR:
Him having a boyfriend
18
00:00:39,081 --> 00:00:41,251
is the best thing that
could have happened.
19
00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:43,380
It means he's off the table.
20
00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:45,547
So, I can focus on Mia.
21
00:00:46,255 --> 00:00:49,085
And everything else is starting
to lock in, too.
22
00:00:49,091 --> 00:00:50,511
I found my Creekwood people.
23
00:00:50,509 --> 00:00:51,889
[whistle blows]
24
00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:54,045
I'm in a good rhythm
on the basketball team.
25
00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:55,144
PLAYER:
Yo!
26
00:00:56,598 --> 00:00:58,058
PLAYER 2:
Oh, dang!
27
00:00:58,058 --> 00:01:00,558
COACH FORD: [laughs]
Oh, you're on fire, Salazar.
28
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:03,271
You keep it up, we could actually
beat Whitman this Friday.
29
00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:07,398
And then maybe the other coaches
would add me to their group text.
30
00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:10,651
‐ All right, don't get cocky.
Okay, you scored on Cooperman.
31
00:01:10,654 --> 00:01:13,124
Like to see you
make that shot on me, yeah?
32
00:01:14,366 --> 00:01:17,076
Well, I didn't‐‐ I didn't mean, like,
right now, okay? I wasn't ready.
33
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:19,537
‐ ♪ Is it too late... ♪
34
00:01:19,872 --> 00:01:22,882
VICTOR: And even my family
seems to be getting along.
35
00:01:22,875 --> 00:01:25,625
FELIX: Ms. S., do you make a poster
for every one of Victor's games?
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00:01:25,627 --> 00:01:26,747
ISABEL: Uh‐huh.
37
00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:29,923
‐ "Salazar" is a "Salastar."
38
00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:33,093
Wow. You are a pun wizard,
and I'm under your spell.
39
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:35,513
‐ [laughs] Thank you, Felix.
40
00:01:35,512 --> 00:01:38,182
At least someone appreciates
my hardcore random.
41
00:01:38,182 --> 00:01:39,892
‐ Yeah, hardcore is right.
42
00:01:39,892 --> 00:01:41,892
Back in Texas during regional semis,
43
00:01:41,894 --> 00:01:45,024
she got ejected from the game
for excessive dancing.
44
00:01:45,022 --> 00:01:46,862
‐ Since when is dancing not allowed?
45
00:01:46,857 --> 00:01:49,147
We don't live in a Footloose world.
46
00:01:49,151 --> 00:01:52,531
‐ Not everyone enjoys watching you twerk
like a geriatric Cardi B.
47
00:01:54,156 --> 00:01:57,986
‐ Honey, even though the sign says
Victor is number one,
48
00:01:57,993 --> 00:02:00,663
I'm just talking about
the basketball game.
49
00:02:00,662 --> 00:02:03,212
I love all my kids exactly the same.
50
00:02:03,207 --> 00:02:05,957
‐ But if you had to rank us,
I'd be on top, right?
51
00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:07,289
‐ [whispers]: Definitely.
52
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:09,882
Shh.
53
00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:11,800
Oh, you're still here?
54
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:18,888
‐ All right, I am so glad you were
able to make it for dinner, Felix.
55
00:02:18,889 --> 00:02:22,519
And breakfast.
It's, uh, it's almost like you live here.
56
00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:24,650
‐ Guys!
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00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:26,265
I feel that way, too.
58
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:29,110
‐ Pilar, it's your turn to say grace.
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00:02:29,107 --> 00:02:32,237
And before you complain, please just‐‐
‐ Actually, it would be my honor.
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00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:34,403
‐ Oh.
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00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:37,494
PILAR: Bless us, oh Lord,
and bless this pizza
which you provided.
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00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:39,121
Bless the hands that prepared it.
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00:02:39,117 --> 00:02:41,577
But most of all, bless my mother, Isabel.
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00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:43,996
She needs your guidance the most,
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00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:47,167
'cause she's nasty, and she knows it.
Amen.
66
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:51,167
‐ Hey! I don't care if you are jealous
about Victor's big game.
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00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:53,971
You may not speak to me that way.
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00:02:53,966 --> 00:02:55,676
ARMANDO:
Your room.
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00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:57,086
Now!
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00:03:02,850 --> 00:03:04,890
[door closes]
FELIX: So...
71
00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:07,233
do you guys, uh, always do grace
roast style?
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00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:10,940
[knocking on door]
PILAR: Go away!
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00:03:12,067 --> 00:03:14,187
‐ Brought you the last slice of sausage.
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00:03:15,946 --> 00:03:17,236
[door closes]
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What's your deal?
76
00:03:18,657 --> 00:03:20,777
This can't be about Mom's pun posters.
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‐ Of course not.
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Victor, Mom had an affair.
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00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:28,793
‐ What? No, she didn't.
80
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,792
‐ After I finished setting up
her Facebook page,
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00:03:30,794 --> 00:03:33,264
some guy named Roger R. started
messaging her all this
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00:03:33,255 --> 00:03:35,215
creepy romantic crap. Look.
83
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VICTOR:
This is, um...
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00:03:42,139 --> 00:03:44,139
We don't know what any of this means.
85
00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:48,185
‐ "I miss you. I wish you were here.
Please call me."
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00:03:48,187 --> 00:03:50,767
‐ He's probably just some
internet creep, okay?
87
00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,402
That's why Mom hasn't written him back.
88
00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:55,359
‐ She hasn't written back because
she hasn't seen the messages yet.
89
00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:58,530
I changed her Facebook password
and said her profile got a virus.
90
00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:00,620
Moms really don't understand
how the internet works.
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00:04:00,616 --> 00:04:02,656
‐ It's probably just spam.
92
00:04:02,659 --> 00:04:05,329
Mom stopped watching Jimmy Kimmel
after he got skinny
93
00:04:05,329 --> 00:04:07,709
because she was having impure thoughts.
94
00:04:07,706 --> 00:04:09,626
There's no way she had an affair.
95
00:04:10,834 --> 00:04:12,294
[computer dings]
96
00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:16,165
[dings]
97
00:04:17,883 --> 00:04:21,183
VICTOR:
Yep, Simon. Everything is going great.
98
00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:24,640
♪ upbeat music playing ♪
99
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:27,100
‐ ♪ Waiting for the time ♪
100
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:30,060
♪ Waiting for the place ♪
101
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♪ And I, I, I ♪
102
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♪ I, I need ♪
103
00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:36,939
♪ Somebody to tell me
it'll be all right ♪
104
00:04:36,944 --> 00:04:39,864
♪ Somebody to tell me
it'll be just fine ♪
105
00:04:39,863 --> 00:04:43,623
♪ If someone has been there before,
say it right now ♪
106
00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:45,537
♪ 'Cause I just need to hear it ♪
107
00:04:47,955 --> 00:04:51,245
♪
108
00:04:54,586 --> 00:04:57,126
[humming along to music on headphones]
109
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‐ Ha ha. Busted!
‐ Dad! [chuckles]
110
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You're home.
111
00:05:05,097 --> 00:05:06,887
Wait, how long have you
been standing there?
112
00:05:06,890 --> 00:05:10,020
‐ Not too long.
[vocalizing]
113
00:05:10,018 --> 00:05:13,058
Come here. I missed you, beans.
[kissing noises]
114
00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:17,572
‐ Uh‐oh. Is that for me?
[Harold sighs]
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00:05:17,568 --> 00:05:19,568
‐ Aah, aah, aah.
116
00:05:19,570 --> 00:05:21,950
‐ What?
‐ All the way from gay Paris.
117
00:05:21,947 --> 00:05:23,737
And what makes you say, "Uh‐oh?"
118
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:26,660
‐ Because you have
disastrous taste in souvenirs.
119
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:29,790
‐ [laughs]
This gift is good. I promise.
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00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:36,091
‐ Dad, this is gorgeous!
121
00:05:36,086 --> 00:05:37,956
Wait, you picked this out?
122
00:05:37,963 --> 00:05:40,093
‐ Well, not exactly.
123
00:05:40,090 --> 00:05:42,760
My, um, friend did.
124
00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:43,839
‐ Oh.
125
00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:46,223
What's an, "um, friend?"
126
00:05:47,598 --> 00:05:49,598
What, were you in Paris with a lady?
127
00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:51,600
Thought this was a work trip.
‐ It was.
128
00:05:51,602 --> 00:05:52,852
It really was.
129
00:05:52,853 --> 00:05:56,363
I was there for an academic symposium
at the Sorbonne.
130
00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,356
Veronica, she just tagged along.
131
00:05:58,358 --> 00:06:01,318
‐ Mm, right. Just like Monica
tagged along to Denver,
132
00:06:01,320 --> 00:06:03,610
and Lauren tagged along to Miami,
133
00:06:03,614 --> 00:06:06,704
and Sidney tagged along to Sydney!
134
00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:09,660
‐ Now, now that was a strange coincidence.
135
00:06:09,661 --> 00:06:11,791
Look, it was brand new, all right,
136
00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:13,618
and I didn't know if
it was going anywhere,
137
00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:17,044
but then, I guess it went somewhere.
138
00:06:17,753 --> 00:06:20,423
‐ Yeah, to a hotel suite
in the city of romance.
139
00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:22,672
‐ Ah, it's actually called
the city of lights.
140
00:06:24,092 --> 00:06:25,972
That's not the point.
141
00:06:25,969 --> 00:06:29,849
Listen, sweetheart, I would like for
you two to meet each other.
142
00:06:29,848 --> 00:06:31,138
We were thinking, you know,
143
00:06:31,141 --> 00:06:33,521
we could all have dinner
maybe later this week.
144
00:06:33,852 --> 00:06:35,022
‐ Yeah, of course.
145
00:06:35,020 --> 00:06:36,900
‐ Yeah?
‐ Mm‐hmm.
146
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:38,727
And thank you for this.
‐ Aah.
147
00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:43,282
‐ Your, um, friend has amazing taste.
[Harold laughs]
148
00:06:43,278 --> 00:06:45,658
‐ I'm excited for you to meet her.
[hands slap]
149
00:06:45,656 --> 00:06:47,696
‐ Yeah, I can't wait.
150
00:06:47,699 --> 00:06:49,699
[Harold chuckles]
151
00:06:49,701 --> 00:06:52,041
MIA:
I just can't, with this dinner.
152
00:06:52,037 --> 00:06:56,377
Every time my dad gets a new girlfriend,
they just get younger and dumber.
153
00:06:56,375 --> 00:06:58,915
‐ What kind of car does he drive again?
‐ Ha ha.
154
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:01,259
‐ So, if you're meeting
the girlfriend on Friday,
155
00:07:01,255 --> 00:07:02,585
does that mean you can't come to the game?
156
00:07:02,589 --> 00:07:04,969
‐ Oh, no. I can do both.
157
00:07:04,967 --> 00:07:06,797
Lake, here, is coming with me
to the dinner,
158
00:07:06,802 --> 00:07:08,852
so she can get us out of it early.
‐ Mm‐hmm.
159
00:07:09,221 --> 00:07:12,931
‐ How?
‐ Oh, uh, I'm the excuse queen, so...
160
00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:15,733
‐ What does that mean?
LAKE: Well, it means...
161
00:07:15,727 --> 00:07:17,147
Oh, my God.
162
00:07:17,145 --> 00:07:19,145
Uh, you guys, my little brother
just swallowed a golf ball,
163
00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:20,687
and now he's in the hospital.
‐ What?
164
00:07:20,691 --> 00:07:22,151
‐ Oh, my gosh. Is he okay?
165
00:07:22,150 --> 00:07:24,490
‐ Excuse queen.
[Victor and Felix laughing]
166
00:07:24,486 --> 00:07:28,566
‐ Oh, my God. That‐‐
You're like, the next Judi Dench.
167
00:07:28,574 --> 00:07:32,414
‐ So, how are you guys so sure your dad's
girlfriend's gonna be terrible?
168
00:07:32,411 --> 00:07:34,201
‐ 'Cause they're all terrible.
[chuckles]
169
00:07:34,204 --> 00:07:35,624
Starting with my drunk mother,
170
00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:37,962
who checked herself into rehab
on my 12th birthday,
171
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:39,328
and never came back.
172
00:07:42,337 --> 00:07:46,007
Sorry. We had good banter going.
Did I kill it? I killed it.
173
00:07:46,008 --> 00:07:48,888
‐ I'm so sorry, Mia.
I, I knew your mom wasn't around, and‐‐
174
00:07:48,886 --> 00:07:52,386
‐ No, it's fine. It was a long time ago.
I am very over it.
175
00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:54,269
‐ It's weird. Before your mom left,
176
00:07:54,266 --> 00:07:55,926
I used to think she was the coolest.
177
00:07:56,852 --> 00:08:00,022
‐ I guess we don't always know
what's going on with our parents.
178
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:05,361
VICTOR:
Hey.
179
00:08:06,195 --> 00:08:09,445
Even though there's no way Mom did
what you think she did, we need answers.
180
00:08:09,448 --> 00:08:12,028
‐ Damn. Mom's little golden boy
turned on her.
181
00:08:12,034 --> 00:08:14,914
‐ I didn't turn. I just want to prove
he's some random stalker,
182
00:08:14,912 --> 00:08:16,622
and move on with our lives.
183
00:08:17,289 --> 00:08:19,039
So, should we just ask her who he is?
184
00:08:19,041 --> 00:08:21,211
‐ No way. She'd just make up some lie.
185
00:08:21,210 --> 00:08:23,420
‐ So, what do you think we should do?
‐ I've already been doing it.
186
00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:25,260
I've been messaging him all day as Mom.
187
00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:27,505
‐ Pilar!
‐ What? She won't know.
188
00:08:27,508 --> 00:08:30,428
And get this. He's coming to Atlanta
on Friday to attend a conference,
189
00:08:30,427 --> 00:08:31,717
and he wants to see Mom.
190
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:32,930
‐ That's not good.
191
00:08:32,930 --> 00:08:35,720
‐ The only conference he's trying
to attend is in Mom's pants.
192
00:08:35,724 --> 00:08:37,894
I think we should go
meet up with him in her place.
193
00:08:37,893 --> 00:08:39,813
But before you say no‐‐
‐ Let's do it.
194
00:08:39,811 --> 00:08:41,061
‐ Really?
195
00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:43,360
‐ Really.
196
00:08:45,150 --> 00:08:48,450
♪
197
00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:55,243
[birds chirping]
198
00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:57,414
MIA: All right.
[Lake sighs]
199
00:08:57,412 --> 00:08:59,542
[silverware clattering]
‐ Now remember, get in, get out.
200
00:08:59,540 --> 00:09:01,040
Meet Harold's new playmate.
201
00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:03,421
Smile blankly as she shows us
pictures of her Chihuahuas
202
00:09:03,418 --> 00:09:06,418
that are probably named after
Bachelor contestants.
203
00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:08,341
Hear about how she's thinking of
starting a new jewelry line.
204
00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:10,630
‐ And at eight on the dot,
I'll excuse queen our way
205
00:09:10,634 --> 00:09:13,764
straight to Victor's game.
Hashtag "Not My First Rodeo."
206
00:09:14,179 --> 00:09:16,679
[doorbell rings]
HAROLD: Mia, sweetheart, she's here.
207
00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:20,439
[Harold sighs]
208
00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:23,188
[indistinct chatter]
How ya doin'?
209
00:09:23,188 --> 00:09:26,148
[kissing noises]
‐ Hmm. This is weird.
210
00:09:26,149 --> 00:09:28,489
She's like, twice my age. So not his type.
211
00:09:29,278 --> 00:09:31,358
‐ She must be great in the sack.
212
00:09:31,363 --> 00:09:32,993
‐ Like, why would you say that?
213
00:09:32,990 --> 00:09:35,580
‐ What? An older woman knows how
to do things a young woman doesn't.
214
00:09:35,576 --> 00:09:38,036
You know, in the baño.
215
00:09:38,036 --> 00:09:40,656
‐ I think you mean in the boudoir.
Baño means bathroom.
216
00:09:40,664 --> 00:09:42,084
‐ Ooh. Kinky.
217
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:44,592
‐ Mia. Lake.
218
00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:47,625
I want you to meet Veronica.
219
00:09:47,629 --> 00:09:48,709
‐ Hi.
MIA: Hi.
220
00:09:48,714 --> 00:09:50,764
It's very nice to meet you.
VERONICA: Hi, Mia.
221
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:52,587
I've been waiting to meet you for weeks,
222
00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:55,303
but your dear old dad
thought it might be too soon.
223
00:09:55,304 --> 00:09:57,014
We can talk about his stubbornness later.
224
00:09:57,014 --> 00:09:59,684
‐ Please, it wasn't just me, all right?
She's been swamped with work.
225
00:10:00,184 --> 00:10:03,444
Veronica runs the
Global Women's Advancement Initiative.
226
00:10:03,437 --> 00:10:05,557
VERONICA: Mm‐hmm.
‐ Is that a jewelry line?
227
00:10:05,564 --> 00:10:08,114
[Harold laughs]
‐ No, actually it's a nonprofit
228
00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:11,108
that supports women through
economic and social initiatives.
229
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:15,031
HAROLD: [chuckles] She's out there
trying to make the world a better place.
230
00:10:15,032 --> 00:10:17,242
That's one thing I love about her.
231
00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:19,372
VERONICA: Aw!
‐ Oh.
232
00:10:19,369 --> 00:10:20,749
‐ All right, so who's hungry?
233
00:10:20,746 --> 00:10:23,416
I tried to make this fancy lamb thing,
234
00:10:23,415 --> 00:10:25,915
but, uh, I want to make sure that
we have enough time to order takeout
235
00:10:25,918 --> 00:10:28,748
just in case it's inedible. [chuckles]
‐ I'm sure it's gonna be great.
236
00:10:28,754 --> 00:10:31,344
He cooks, which is one of the things
I love about him.
237
00:10:31,340 --> 00:10:34,220
HAROLD: [chuckles]
Come on, let's get you some wine.
238
00:10:34,218 --> 00:10:35,838
[elevator bell dings]
[indistinct chatter]
239
00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:41,558
‐ How do we know which one is Roger?
240
00:10:41,558 --> 00:10:43,688
His only profile picture is a dog.
241
00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:45,475
Oh! Look at that guy.
242
00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:48,899
By himself. Two drinks.
Obviously waiting for someone.
243
00:10:48,899 --> 00:10:50,859
Plus, he looks like a Roger.
244
00:10:50,859 --> 00:10:52,319
‐ How does someone look like a Roger?
245
00:10:52,319 --> 00:10:55,449
‐ The khakis. The receding hairline.
The windbreaker.
246
00:10:55,447 --> 00:10:57,487
VICTOR:
I'm starting to think this was a bad idea.
247
00:10:57,491 --> 00:10:58,741
‐ I'm going in.
248
00:10:58,742 --> 00:11:01,122
‐ Oh, please stay calm, and‐‐
Or better yet, just let me do the talking.
249
00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:02,789
It'd be better‐‐ [sighs]
‐ Hey!
250
00:11:02,788 --> 00:11:04,998
We know who you are,
and we know why you're here.
251
00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:07,418
Isabel already has as a family.
‐ What?
252
00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:10,747
‐ Yeah. She has a husband and three kids
who she loves very, very much.
253
00:11:10,754 --> 00:11:13,174
‐ So you need to leave our mom alone.
254
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,093
‐ Who the hell is Isabel?
255
00:11:15,092 --> 00:11:16,472
‐ I have no idea!
256
00:11:16,468 --> 00:11:19,218
‐ It's that woman you're always
on the phone with, isn't it?
257
00:11:19,221 --> 00:11:21,311
‐ We've been over this. That's Siri!
258
00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:23,976
She's not a person. She is my phone.
259
00:11:23,976 --> 00:11:25,726
‐ I don't think that was Roger.
260
00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:27,727
‐ Uh, yeah! That was stupid.
261
00:11:27,729 --> 00:11:30,149
And as much as I love ruining
random strangers' marriages,
262
00:11:30,148 --> 00:11:32,608
I have a game to get to.
So why don't we just...
263
00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,073
[elevator bell dings]
264
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:38,527
PILAR:
What?
265
00:11:38,532 --> 00:11:39,952
‐ I know that guy.
266
00:11:41,827 --> 00:11:43,827
That's Dad's old boss.
267
00:11:43,829 --> 00:11:46,209
‐ I thought Ramon was his old boss.
268
00:11:46,707 --> 00:11:52,047
‐ Ramon was the foreman. This...
This guy was the big boss.
269
00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:55,839
I met him at the company holiday party
back in Texas.
270
00:11:56,550 --> 00:12:00,300
‐ I don't get it.
How would Mom even know his big boss?
271
00:12:00,304 --> 00:12:03,024
And why would they‐‐
‐ Let's go.
272
00:12:03,015 --> 00:12:05,345
‐ We didn't even get to talk to him.
‐ We're going.
273
00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:07,190
I, I don't want to be here.
274
00:12:07,186 --> 00:12:08,596
[Pilar grunts]
275
00:12:12,024 --> 00:12:14,574
HAROLD: [chuckles]
The fundraiser's almost over,
276
00:12:14,568 --> 00:12:18,528
and this pretty lady hands me a napkin
with a large number written on it.
277
00:12:19,156 --> 00:12:21,986
VERONICA: Oh‐‐
‐ I'm thinking she wants to
make a donation to the university.
278
00:12:21,992 --> 00:12:24,912
‐ It was your number.
Oh, she was giving your dad her number.
279
00:12:24,912 --> 00:12:26,792
‐ Mm‐hmm. Got it.
280
00:12:31,627 --> 00:12:34,207
Great. Lake and I are gonna
clear the plates.
281
00:12:34,213 --> 00:12:36,173
LAKE: Okay, yeah. Uh, sure.
HAROLD: All right.
282
00:12:36,173 --> 00:12:38,093
‐ Why were you laughing at her?
283
00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:40,761
That was mildly humorous, at best.
284
00:12:40,761 --> 00:12:44,521
‐ I don't know. She's charming,
and age‐appropriate.
285
00:12:44,515 --> 00:12:47,175
I thought you'd be glad she's not some
20‐something floozy
286
00:12:47,184 --> 00:12:49,604
who thinks Kamala Harris
is a "Real Housewife."
287
00:12:49,603 --> 00:12:53,113
‐ I thought I'd be glad, too,
but for some reason, I'm not.
288
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:55,356
‐ [sighs] Well, do you wanna bail early?
289
00:12:55,359 --> 00:12:57,689
I created a fake text saying
my parents are in the hospital
290
00:12:57,694 --> 00:12:59,404
for carbon monoxide poisoning.
291
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:01,164
‐ God, no.
292
00:13:01,156 --> 00:13:03,116
Hmm, I don't want to go just yet.
293
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:05,116
Something's not right.
294
00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:08,368
‐ Oof, yeah.
Your dad's lamb is not sitting well.
295
00:13:08,372 --> 00:13:10,672
‐ All right. Hold off on the excuse.
296
00:13:10,958 --> 00:13:13,838
I want to figure out
what her deal really is.
297
00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:15,586
VERONICA: Oh!
HAROLD: Look at that!
298
00:13:15,587 --> 00:13:18,717
‐ Yes, please!
The diet can start tomorrow.
299
00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:21,545
[Lake laughs]
‐ So, Veronica,
300
00:13:21,552 --> 00:13:23,602
ever been married?
301
00:13:23,595 --> 00:13:25,965
‐ Um, no. Actually, I haven't.
302
00:13:25,973 --> 00:13:29,313
‐ Hmm, that's odd.
An accomplished, intelligent,
303
00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:31,649
pretty‐enough woman like you.
What happened?
304
00:13:32,938 --> 00:13:36,398
‐ Mia.
Come on, you're being a little rude.
305
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:39,437
‐ It's okay.
I've testified before Congress.
306
00:13:39,444 --> 00:13:40,654
This is nothing.
307
00:13:42,531 --> 00:13:45,371
I guess I just haven't really prioritized
my personal life.
308
00:13:45,367 --> 00:13:48,907
For many years, I was really addicted to‐‐
‐ Pills?
309
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:53,543
‐ No. I was going to say
I was addicted to my work.
310
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:56,132
I have a tendency to
place my career first.
311
00:13:56,128 --> 00:13:59,258
‐ Got it. Ever have any children?
‐ No.
312
00:13:59,256 --> 00:14:01,126
‐ Well, how many partners have you
not had children with?
313
00:14:01,133 --> 00:14:03,893
HAROLD:
Mia Brooks! [scoffs]
314
00:14:03,886 --> 00:14:07,136
‐ Oh, no! My house has monoxide.
315
00:14:07,139 --> 00:14:10,349
‐ I'm sorry about this, Veronica.
My daughter...
316
00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:12,140
has clearly gone insane.
317
00:14:12,144 --> 00:14:13,904
VERONICA:
It's okay, Harold.
318
00:14:14,396 --> 00:14:16,976
I think I understand
what's going on here.
319
00:14:16,982 --> 00:14:18,282
‐ Hmm.
320
00:14:18,275 --> 00:14:20,855
‐ You're acting out, because your dad
is in a real relationship,
321
00:14:20,861 --> 00:14:23,281
and that freaks you out. I get it.
322
00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:26,950
But Mia, I just want you to know,
I'm not trying to replace your mother.
323
00:14:26,950 --> 00:14:29,660
‐ I wish you would replace my mother,
because then you wouldn't even be here.
324
00:14:29,661 --> 00:14:31,001
HAROLD:
Hey!
325
00:14:31,788 --> 00:14:33,788
What the hell has gotten into you?
326
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:37,793
[thuds]
327
00:14:38,629 --> 00:14:41,049
‐ The lamb was everything. So...
328
00:14:44,134 --> 00:14:45,144
[scoffs]
329
00:14:46,595 --> 00:14:48,135
Love this.
330
00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:52,269
[door opens, then closes]
331
00:14:52,267 --> 00:14:55,517
♪ upbeat music playing ♪
332
00:14:57,439 --> 00:14:58,479
‐ They're already here.
333
00:15:00,025 --> 00:15:01,985
I can't even look at her.
334
00:15:01,985 --> 00:15:04,565
‐ Promise you won't say anything to Mom
until after the game.
335
00:15:05,697 --> 00:15:07,197
‐ Okay.
336
00:15:10,702 --> 00:15:12,622
‐ So, are we gonna talk about that dinner,
337
00:15:12,621 --> 00:15:14,541
and how "jealous daughter"
is not a good look on you?
338
00:15:14,540 --> 00:15:17,250
‐ No. We're here to support Victor
and have fun.
339
00:15:17,251 --> 00:15:19,001
Go, Grizzlies!
340
00:15:19,002 --> 00:15:21,632
‐ Your mommy is cray.
[kisses]
341
00:15:21,630 --> 00:15:23,470
‐ ♪ I been up ♪
342
00:15:23,799 --> 00:15:25,219
♪ I been down ♪
343
00:15:25,217 --> 00:15:27,257
[crowd cheering]
344
00:15:27,261 --> 00:15:30,141
‐ You all right, man?
‐ I'm fine.
345
00:15:30,138 --> 00:15:32,808
‐ Bring that aggro out onto
the court tonight. I want to win.
346
00:15:34,059 --> 00:15:36,099
[all cheering]
347
00:15:36,103 --> 00:15:39,153
‐ All right, all right, guys. Bring it in.
Grizzlies, bring it in.
348
00:15:39,147 --> 00:15:42,817
All right. We haven't beaten Whitman
in four years.
349
00:15:42,818 --> 00:15:44,698
But by a stroke of good luck,
350
00:15:44,695 --> 00:15:47,695
their star center fell off a ladder
and broke his femur.
351
00:15:47,698 --> 00:15:50,658
‐ All right.
‐ Sorry, that sounded overly gleeful.
352
00:15:50,659 --> 00:15:53,039
I hope he has a speedy recovery.
353
00:15:53,036 --> 00:15:56,576
Look, the point is,
I think we have a real shot this year.
354
00:15:56,582 --> 00:15:58,962
Especially since we got Salazar.
355
00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:02,129
So for the love of God,
let's just win this game.
356
00:16:02,129 --> 00:16:04,049
Come on, put it in.
PLAYER: All right, guys, bring it in.
357
00:16:04,047 --> 00:16:06,547
‐ Grizzlies on three! Grizzlies on three!
One, two, three‐‐
358
00:16:06,550 --> 00:16:08,300
ALL:
Grizzlies!
359
00:16:08,886 --> 00:16:11,096
[all cheering and yelling]
360
00:16:16,059 --> 00:16:19,519
ISABEL: Here we go, Victor, here we go.
[all clap]
361
00:16:19,521 --> 00:16:23,111
Here we go, Victor, here we go.
‐ Mm. Must be Victor's parents.
362
00:16:24,860 --> 00:16:26,820
At least one of us has a normal family.
363
00:16:26,820 --> 00:16:27,910
♪
364
00:16:27,905 --> 00:16:31,195
‐ Ooh. Mom keeps it tight,
and Dad has a full head of hair.
365
00:16:31,825 --> 00:16:34,115
That bodes so well
for your someday babies.
366
00:16:34,119 --> 00:16:35,619
[crowd cheering]
367
00:16:35,621 --> 00:16:38,621
♪
368
00:16:38,624 --> 00:16:40,044
GIRL:
Woo!
369
00:16:41,668 --> 00:16:42,628
[whistle blows]
370
00:16:43,378 --> 00:16:45,208
PLAYER 1:
Turn it around!
371
00:16:45,214 --> 00:16:46,514
PLAYER 2:
Yeah, come on!
372
00:16:46,507 --> 00:16:48,217
‐ Come on, guys. Set it up.
373
00:16:49,676 --> 00:16:50,886
‐ Hey. Ball.
374
00:16:51,386 --> 00:16:53,136
WOMAN: Shoot it!
ISABEL: Go, mijo!
375
00:16:53,138 --> 00:16:55,178
PLAYER 1: Come on, man!
PLAYER 2: Victor, let go!
376
00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:57,644
PLAYER 1:
Salazar, pass, bro!
377
00:16:58,644 --> 00:16:59,814
PLAYER 2:
Yo, Salazar, what's up?
378
00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:01,731
[crowd chattering, cheering]
379
00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:04,780
[crowd groaning]
380
00:17:07,653 --> 00:17:08,493
[grunts]
381
00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:17,196
ANDREW:
Yo, Victor, get your head in the game!
382
00:17:18,372 --> 00:17:19,712
‐ Hey! Ho!
383
00:17:19,706 --> 00:17:21,626
ANDREW:
Vic, Vic, Vic, Vic!
384
00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:23,165
PLAYER:
Oh, my... Come on!
385
00:17:23,168 --> 00:17:25,208
‐ Dude, get your head out of your ass.
386
00:17:25,212 --> 00:17:26,842
‐ I'm just off tonight, okay?
387
00:17:26,839 --> 00:17:28,629
ISABEL: It's all right. It's all right.
‐ All right, you got it.
388
00:17:33,262 --> 00:17:34,722
[whistle chirps twice]
389
00:17:34,721 --> 00:17:36,141
‐ Traveling.
390
00:17:36,139 --> 00:17:38,229
‐ You called that before
I even touched the ground!
391
00:17:38,225 --> 00:17:40,805
‐ Creekwood, get your point under control.
392
00:17:40,811 --> 00:17:43,151
‐ [scoffs] I'm under control.
393
00:17:43,146 --> 00:17:45,476
‐ Salazar, take a seat and cool down.
394
00:17:45,482 --> 00:17:47,072
‐ You're benching me?
395
00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:48,607
This is bullshit!
[slams]
396
00:17:48,610 --> 00:17:50,240
[whistle blows]
[crowd murmuring]
397
00:17:54,032 --> 00:17:55,492
[door slams]
398
00:17:56,535 --> 00:17:58,245
[door closes]
399
00:18:08,255 --> 00:18:09,545
‐ Victor.
400
00:18:10,507 --> 00:18:12,127
Victor.
401
00:18:12,134 --> 00:18:13,894
Victor, stop.
402
00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:17,260
What is going on with you?
403
00:18:17,264 --> 00:18:19,684
We didn't raise you to behave like that.
It's disgraceful.
404
00:18:19,683 --> 00:18:20,893
‐ I'm disgraceful?
405
00:18:20,893 --> 00:18:23,813
I'm not the one having an affair
behind Dad's back!
406
00:18:24,980 --> 00:18:27,270
You cheated on Dad with his boss!
407
00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:30,280
Does he know?
ARMANDO: Victor!
408
00:18:33,197 --> 00:18:34,817
I know.
409
00:18:34,823 --> 00:18:36,373
I know. She told me everything,
410
00:18:36,366 --> 00:18:38,406
and it wasn't easy, but, hey,
she was honest.
411
00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:40,542
‐ Honest?
412
00:18:41,705 --> 00:18:43,995
She got with your boss,
and you think she's honest?
413
00:18:43,999 --> 00:18:45,749
‐ Oh, bueno.
We are not doing this here.
414
00:18:45,751 --> 00:18:47,881
Not in front of your little brother,
so just... get in the car.
415
00:18:51,423 --> 00:18:53,223
Victor, get in the car.
416
00:18:58,972 --> 00:19:00,352
‐ Oh, my God.
417
00:19:00,349 --> 00:19:02,889
‐ I know. I'm sorry, okay...
418
00:19:02,893 --> 00:19:04,773
All right. Let's go. Now.
419
00:19:05,896 --> 00:19:07,976
[keys jangle]
[alarm beeps twice]
420
00:19:07,981 --> 00:19:09,441
[car door closes]
421
00:19:14,404 --> 00:19:17,704
‐ The first thing you kids
need to know is that...
422
00:19:17,699 --> 00:19:21,329
your mom and I, we're...
we're not perfect.
423
00:19:21,328 --> 00:19:23,208
But we love each other.
424
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:25,035
Very much.
425
00:19:25,040 --> 00:19:28,380
‐ And what happened with Roger...
426
00:19:29,294 --> 00:19:30,594
[Isabel clears throat]
427
00:19:32,256 --> 00:19:35,256
...with your dad's old boss was...
428
00:19:36,009 --> 00:19:38,969
He hired me to give his son piano lessons.
429
00:19:39,596 --> 00:19:42,346
And, uh, we became friends.
430
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:47,520
After the lessons, we would have
a cup of coffee, and just...
431
00:19:48,188 --> 00:19:49,398
talk.
432
00:19:54,570 --> 00:19:55,950
I was just...
433
00:19:57,114 --> 00:20:00,244
I liked having someone
who showed an interest in me.
434
00:20:02,244 --> 00:20:03,954
And that was it. It was just a friendship.
435
00:20:03,954 --> 00:20:06,674
Two friends having coffee.
Listening to music.
436
00:20:06,665 --> 00:20:08,035
And then...
437
00:20:08,917 --> 00:20:11,587
[exhales]
...somewhere along the way...
438
00:20:12,921 --> 00:20:14,091
Uh...
439
00:20:15,632 --> 00:20:18,472
I just, I need you guys to know
440
00:20:18,468 --> 00:20:22,058
that as soon as it crossed the line
and it got physical, I shut it down.
441
00:20:22,055 --> 00:20:24,015
As far as‐‐
‐ Isabel, they don't need details.
442
00:20:31,773 --> 00:20:34,233
‐ What I did was wrong.
443
00:20:36,695 --> 00:20:39,485
And I love your father
more than anything.
444
00:20:40,616 --> 00:20:42,156
‐ I took your mother for granted.
445
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,370
And she needed someone to talk to.
446
00:20:50,334 --> 00:20:52,924
‐ Anyway, so, um,
447
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:55,090
after all of that,
448
00:20:55,088 --> 00:20:58,968
we decided that the best thing
for our marriage,
449
00:20:58,967 --> 00:21:01,347
for the family, was a fresh start.
450
00:21:01,345 --> 00:21:04,345
And then Dad got this
great job offer here, so‐‐
451
00:21:04,348 --> 00:21:07,228
‐ Wait. This is why we moved?
452
00:21:07,226 --> 00:21:10,056
Because you did whatever the hell you did
with Dad's boss?
453
00:21:12,731 --> 00:21:14,941
‐ I'm so sorry, mijitos.
454
00:21:15,692 --> 00:21:17,402
I don't know what else to say.
455
00:21:17,402 --> 00:21:21,822
I'm so‐‐ I am so, so sorry.
456
00:21:23,742 --> 00:21:25,292
[door closes]
457
00:21:31,583 --> 00:21:32,963
[door closes]
458
00:21:39,299 --> 00:21:41,429
Thank you for saying that.
459
00:21:42,845 --> 00:21:45,755
For, um,
trying to make me not the bad guy.
460
00:21:47,015 --> 00:21:50,265
‐ Well, thank you for not
telling the rest. [chuckles]
461
00:21:52,646 --> 00:21:55,766
‐ They hate me already.
Why should they hate you, too?
462
00:21:59,736 --> 00:22:03,406
‐ I just felt like I, I knew her better
than anyone else in the world.
463
00:22:04,157 --> 00:22:06,697
You know? Like...
464
00:22:06,702 --> 00:22:11,792
I know that's lame to say about my mom,
but it's how I felt. You know?
465
00:22:13,125 --> 00:22:14,495
[exhales]
466
00:22:15,460 --> 00:22:18,050
I'm sorry. I really shouldn't be
complaining to you.
467
00:22:18,046 --> 00:22:19,916
Your mom's been through it, and...
468
00:22:20,841 --> 00:22:23,891
‐ Um, Victor,
469
00:22:23,886 --> 00:22:27,216
uh, my mom's not an addict.
470
00:22:29,766 --> 00:22:33,186
‐ But, but at lunch, you said that‐‐
‐ Yeah, I know what I said.
471
00:22:34,897 --> 00:22:37,727
So when my mom and dad met,
472
00:22:37,733 --> 00:22:40,323
he was this young psych professor.
473
00:22:41,153 --> 00:22:45,533
And my mom was this total
free spirit artist.
474
00:22:45,532 --> 00:22:47,532
She was taking one of his classes.
475
00:22:48,243 --> 00:22:51,913
And, um, anyway,
they eventually got married,
476
00:22:51,914 --> 00:22:54,124
um, because he wanted to.
477
00:22:54,124 --> 00:22:58,924
And then they had a kid,
because he wanted to.
478
00:23:00,047 --> 00:23:05,757
And when he became university president,
they moved into this giant house.
479
00:23:06,428 --> 00:23:10,348
And then all of a sudden,
she was alone all day.
480
00:23:10,349 --> 00:23:13,019
Trapped in this huge house.
481
00:23:13,018 --> 00:23:15,808
In this life that she never wanted.
482
00:23:16,980 --> 00:23:18,980
Trapped with me.
483
00:23:21,235 --> 00:23:24,145
I think at a certain point, she just...
484
00:23:24,154 --> 00:23:29,164
couldn't take it anymore.
So, she left.
485
00:23:31,495 --> 00:23:33,785
No explanation. No goodbye.
486
00:23:36,041 --> 00:23:38,591
‐ So why do you tell people
that she was an addict?
487
00:23:41,547 --> 00:23:43,047
‐ Uh...
488
00:23:44,508 --> 00:23:46,008
...because, um...
489
00:23:47,761 --> 00:23:51,431
I don't, I don't want to admit that I...
490
00:23:51,431 --> 00:23:56,351
wasn't enough to make her stay.
491
00:23:56,353 --> 00:23:59,773
♪ "Angel" by FINNEAS ♪
492
00:23:59,773 --> 00:24:01,903
Lying doesn't hurt as much.
493
00:24:04,194 --> 00:24:09,164
But hey.
I, I know what happened with your mom
494
00:24:09,157 --> 00:24:10,987
is a lot.
495
00:24:10,993 --> 00:24:13,913
But I saw her cheering for you
at the game,
496
00:24:13,912 --> 00:24:17,002
and she loves you an embarrassing amount.
497
00:24:17,833 --> 00:24:20,633
So, just try to forgive her.
498
00:24:21,962 --> 00:24:23,382
Okay?
499
00:24:26,466 --> 00:24:28,046
‐ I'll try.
500
00:24:28,051 --> 00:24:30,641
‐ And look at the silver lining.
501
00:24:30,637 --> 00:24:32,097
If she hadn't made that mistake,
502
00:24:32,097 --> 00:24:34,597
then you wouldn't have moved here,
and we wouldn't have met.
503
00:24:35,017 --> 00:24:36,597
[both laugh softly]
504
00:24:37,603 --> 00:24:39,863
‐ You know, your mom was a total idiot
for not realizing
505
00:24:39,855 --> 00:24:41,605
what she was walking away from.
506
00:24:42,691 --> 00:24:44,191
You know that, right?
507
00:24:44,193 --> 00:24:46,453
‐ ♪ Kiss both your eyes and cheeks ♪
508
00:24:46,445 --> 00:24:49,985
♪ I know we're not the same ♪
509
00:24:49,990 --> 00:24:51,910
‐ Sorry. [laughs]
510
00:24:53,535 --> 00:24:58,575
‐ ♪ You're an angel ♪
511
00:25:00,751 --> 00:25:04,511
♪ In disguise ♪
512
00:25:05,088 --> 00:25:06,588
[laughs]
513
00:25:08,258 --> 00:25:13,348
♪ You're an angel ♪
514
00:25:17,309 --> 00:25:18,939
[door closes]
515
00:25:31,657 --> 00:25:32,907
[exhales]
516
00:25:33,534 --> 00:25:35,294
‐ Why is it on mute?
517
00:25:37,079 --> 00:25:41,379
‐ I can't figure out how to get
the sound to play through the TV again.
518
00:25:41,375 --> 00:25:42,705
[chuckles]
519
00:25:45,295 --> 00:25:46,795
‐ I, uh...
520
00:25:46,797 --> 00:25:48,627
I like the poster you made.
521
00:25:49,883 --> 00:25:51,183
It was a good one.
522
00:25:52,469 --> 00:25:56,219
‐ Not my best pun, but it's getting hard
for me to top myself.
523
00:25:59,142 --> 00:26:00,482
[exhales]
524
00:26:04,064 --> 00:26:06,324
I love how close we are, Victor.
525
00:26:08,610 --> 00:26:11,030
What you and I have is special.
526
00:26:11,530 --> 00:26:14,410
And I really hope that what I did...
527
00:26:15,993 --> 00:26:18,123
I just...
528
00:26:18,120 --> 00:26:20,580
I hope it hasn't changed us.
529
00:26:23,542 --> 00:26:25,342
‐ I love you, Mom, but...
530
00:26:26,295 --> 00:26:28,415
I don't want to talk about this
right now.
531
00:26:32,050 --> 00:26:34,390
I don't think I'll ever
want to talk about it.
532
00:26:40,100 --> 00:26:41,310
‐ Okay.
533
00:26:41,310 --> 00:26:43,980
♪ "Your Way" by Jai Wolf ♪
534
00:26:43,979 --> 00:26:45,899
[exhales]
535
00:26:50,402 --> 00:26:54,702
‐ ♪ I already know your ways ♪
536
00:26:58,493 --> 00:27:03,293
♪ But I don't expect to change ♪
537
00:27:04,958 --> 00:27:10,628
♪ I won't be in your way ♪
538
00:27:13,050 --> 00:27:18,720
♪ I won't be in your way ♪
539
00:27:20,599 --> 00:27:22,139
SIMON:
Hey, Victor.
540
00:27:22,142 --> 00:27:24,692
Sorry for being out of commission
the last few days.
541
00:27:25,896 --> 00:27:28,066
The fam was in town for parents' weekend,
542
00:27:28,065 --> 00:27:30,645
and Bram and I were
showing them around the city.
543
00:27:31,401 --> 00:27:33,151
We had a pretty great week.
544
00:27:34,530 --> 00:27:36,410
How was yours?
545
00:27:37,950 --> 00:27:40,910
♪
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