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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,001 --> 00:00:11,001 Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:00:16,900 --> 00:00:20,536 [Q] 1994. Welcome to Staten Island, 3 00:00:20,603 --> 00:00:23,472 a great year and a great place to grow up. 4 00:00:25,108 --> 00:00:28,078 [engine turns over] 5 00:00:28,144 --> 00:00:30,446 [EMF's "Unbelievable" playing] 6 00:00:30,512 --> 00:00:33,415 That's Stacey, my hula girl. 7 00:00:33,482 --> 00:00:35,517 Oh, oh, that's me in high school. 8 00:00:35,584 --> 00:00:37,053 Man, look at that hair. 9 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:39,256 I look just like Chandler Bing, right? 10 00:00:39,322 --> 00:00:40,957 Just go with it. 11 00:00:41,024 --> 00:00:44,526 ♪ You're always asking what it's all about ♪ 12 00:00:44,593 --> 00:00:46,263 Rooty-toot-toot! 13 00:00:46,329 --> 00:00:49,832 - Hey, Q. - Hey! 14 00:00:49,900 --> 00:00:51,368 Hey, how's your sister doing? 15 00:00:51,433 --> 00:00:55,071 - Wouldn't you like to know? - [laughs] 16 00:00:55,138 --> 00:00:57,207 I would. I really would. 17 00:00:57,274 --> 00:01:00,243 ♪ Your purple prose just gives you away ♪ 18 00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:02,645 ♪ The things you say ♪ 19 00:01:02,711 --> 00:01:04,381 ♪ You're unbelievable ♪ 20 00:01:04,446 --> 00:01:05,547 Dad. 21 00:01:05,614 --> 00:01:06,849 Can I have permission to go 22 00:01:06,917 --> 00:01:08,385 to the Paula Abdul concert, please? 23 00:01:08,450 --> 00:01:09,818 - Go, Sal, go. - I know the rules, Dad. 24 00:01:09,886 --> 00:01:11,820 I will check in, I will beep you, I'll call. 25 00:01:11,888 --> 00:01:13,589 Okay, rule number one, we love each other. 26 00:01:13,656 --> 00:01:14,958 Rule number two, see rule number one. 27 00:01:15,025 --> 00:01:16,359 Please get out of the house and go. 28 00:01:16,425 --> 00:01:18,494 Okay. People smoke marijuana. 29 00:01:18,560 --> 00:01:19,828 Do the weed. Take a shot. 30 00:01:19,896 --> 00:01:21,730 Just get out of the house. Please, go. 31 00:01:21,797 --> 00:01:22,498 Just go! 32 00:01:22,564 --> 00:01:23,867 [horn honks] 33 00:01:23,934 --> 00:01:26,835 Oh, hey, Q! [laughs] I'll be right there. 34 00:01:29,805 --> 00:01:32,208 ♪ The things you say ♪ 35 00:01:32,275 --> 00:01:33,809 [bell ringing] 36 00:01:33,877 --> 00:01:34,843 ♪ Your purple prose just gives you away ♪ 37 00:01:34,911 --> 00:01:36,913 ♪ The things you say ♪ 38 00:01:36,980 --> 00:01:39,548 ♪ You're unbelievable ♪ 39 00:01:39,615 --> 00:01:41,151 ♪ Oh! ♪ 40 00:01:41,217 --> 00:01:42,152 [horn honks] 41 00:01:42,218 --> 00:01:44,220 Hey, fellas. 42 00:01:46,655 --> 00:01:48,657 'Sup? My best friend, Sal. 43 00:01:48,724 --> 00:01:51,794 And there's Q too. Hey, guys. 44 00:01:51,861 --> 00:01:54,763 [bowling pins clattering] 45 00:01:54,830 --> 00:01:56,632 ♪ Whoa, man! ♪ 46 00:01:56,699 --> 00:01:58,368 [bowling pins clatter] 47 00:01:58,435 --> 00:02:00,170 ♪ Seemingly lastless, don't mean you can ask us ♪ 48 00:02:00,236 --> 00:02:02,439 Oh-ho-ho! 49 00:02:02,504 --> 00:02:03,974 ♪ Think of the fine times ♪ 50 00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:04,941 Boys! 51 00:02:05,008 --> 00:02:06,409 - I have a question. - Yeah? 52 00:02:06,475 --> 00:02:07,444 Are you forever my girl? 53 00:02:07,509 --> 00:02:08,378 Straight up. Now, tell me. 54 00:02:08,445 --> 00:02:09,712 - Whoo! - Yeah! 55 00:02:09,778 --> 00:02:10,779 - That's right, watch it. - Oh, come on, Joe. 56 00:02:10,846 --> 00:02:12,415 - Come on. - Comin' in hot. 57 00:02:12,481 --> 00:02:14,451 All right, watch that... watch that leather back there. 58 00:02:14,516 --> 00:02:16,186 You're the worst. 59 00:02:16,252 --> 00:02:18,787 ♪ The things you say ♪ 60 00:02:18,855 --> 00:02:21,391 ♪ You're unbelievable ♪ 61 00:02:21,458 --> 00:02:23,026 Hey, Abdul. 62 00:02:23,093 --> 00:02:24,560 Too bad we don't have tickets. 63 00:02:24,626 --> 00:02:26,528 Tickets? Tickets are for losers, dude. 64 00:02:26,595 --> 00:02:27,696 I got a plan. 65 00:02:27,763 --> 00:02:30,967 [tense rock music] 66 00:02:33,669 --> 00:02:35,637 - Who gets the small? - Hey! 67 00:02:35,704 --> 00:02:37,573 - Really? - Yeah, why not? 68 00:02:37,639 --> 00:02:40,143 Hmm. Well, who's ready to party tonight? 69 00:02:40,210 --> 00:02:41,610 What are you doing? 70 00:02:41,677 --> 00:02:43,046 - I'm being hype man. - He hyped you right there. 71 00:02:43,113 --> 00:02:44,948 Joey's a great hype man, and I know hype men. 72 00:02:45,015 --> 00:02:46,916 Yeah, throughout history, there's been many a hype man. 73 00:02:46,983 --> 00:02:49,585 - Who? - Thomas Edison had one. 74 00:02:49,651 --> 00:02:50,887 - Gandhi. - Caesar. 75 00:02:50,954 --> 00:02:52,755 Okay, all right, Caesar had a hype man. 76 00:02:52,821 --> 00:02:53,990 You guys should look it up. 77 00:02:54,057 --> 00:02:56,159 Who was Caesar's hype man, then? 78 00:02:56,226 --> 00:02:57,160 [both] Jeff. 79 00:02:57,227 --> 00:02:58,428 I'm done. 80 00:02:58,495 --> 00:02:59,462 I'm done with this. I'm done... 81 00:02:59,528 --> 00:03:00,629 - Can we go? - Yeah. 82 00:03:00,696 --> 00:03:03,732 [rock music] 83 00:03:11,041 --> 00:03:12,509 - 'Scuse! - On the left. 84 00:03:12,574 --> 00:03:14,177 - Excuse you. Excuse me. - Up on the right. 85 00:03:14,244 --> 00:03:16,779 - You. Excuse you. Security. - On the left. 86 00:03:16,845 --> 00:03:18,680 - Move. - Move. 87 00:03:18,747 --> 00:03:20,616 - Security. - Just watch it. 88 00:03:20,682 --> 00:03:21,851 [woman] Idiot. 89 00:03:21,918 --> 00:03:23,619 Hey, uh, who are you guys? 90 00:03:23,685 --> 00:03:26,289 Uh, high-level security. 91 00:03:29,059 --> 00:03:31,961 [dramatic music] 92 00:03:45,508 --> 00:03:47,177 [sighs] 93 00:03:50,513 --> 00:03:52,315 I'll allow it. 94 00:03:56,785 --> 00:03:58,754 [all quietly cheering] 95 00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:00,523 What do we do now? What do we do now? 96 00:04:00,589 --> 00:04:02,058 Whatever the hell we want. 97 00:04:03,625 --> 00:04:05,895 Move! Watch it. Coming through. 98 00:04:07,197 --> 00:04:08,965 The arena is ours. 99 00:04:09,032 --> 00:04:10,934 Wait, who is this? Where's Larry? 100 00:04:14,304 --> 00:04:16,638 - Hit it! - ♪ Nah, nah-nah-nah-nah ♪ 101 00:04:16,705 --> 00:04:19,641 ♪ Nah-nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah, nah-nah-nah ♪ 102 00:04:19,708 --> 00:04:21,544 Green room, fellas. 103 00:04:21,610 --> 00:04:23,980 Everything is free. [laughs] 104 00:04:27,683 --> 00:04:29,085 How great is this? 105 00:04:29,152 --> 00:04:31,820 [laughs] Oh. 106 00:04:31,888 --> 00:04:33,123 Hey, say hello to my dad. 107 00:04:33,189 --> 00:04:34,891 - Hey, Daddy. - [chuckles] 108 00:04:34,958 --> 00:04:36,792 No, it's my dad. I don't call him Daddy. 109 00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:38,727 Oh. I'm sorry. 110 00:04:38,794 --> 00:04:40,296 You're security? 111 00:04:40,363 --> 00:04:41,697 Yeah, just... Please. 112 00:04:41,763 --> 00:04:44,033 Look at that zoom. I can see your pores. 113 00:04:46,202 --> 00:04:47,937 Yuck. [laughs] 114 00:04:50,273 --> 00:04:52,175 - What are you doing? - Oh, me? Hypin'. 115 00:04:52,242 --> 00:04:53,842 - Hypin' what? - Eh, you know, the crudités. 116 00:04:53,910 --> 00:04:55,245 You're over here by yourself shaking your head. 117 00:04:55,311 --> 00:04:57,614 I know, I'm just excited for crudités, what? 118 00:04:57,679 --> 00:04:59,048 I was taping you from across the room. 119 00:04:59,115 --> 00:05:00,450 You look like a doo-wop dad. 120 00:05:00,517 --> 00:05:01,683 Hold on one second. 121 00:05:01,750 --> 00:05:03,153 Yo, Bubba Gump, 122 00:05:03,219 --> 00:05:05,255 Want to leave some shrimp for the rest of us? 123 00:05:05,321 --> 00:05:06,322 [laughter] Oh, my... 124 00:05:06,389 --> 00:05:07,756 - Oh, my God, sick reference! - Classic. 125 00:05:07,823 --> 00:05:09,092 I just saw Forrest Gump this week. 126 00:05:09,159 --> 00:05:10,759 - Guys, Paula Abdul, 12:00. - [all gasp] 127 00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:15,198 Check out the banana patrol. 128 00:05:18,134 --> 00:05:19,469 Was she just checking me out? 129 00:05:19,536 --> 00:05:20,702 - Yeah. - Oh, yeah. Right at you. 130 00:05:20,769 --> 00:05:22,338 - She was. - Oh, you see that, right? 131 00:05:22,405 --> 00:05:24,007 You should probably get her number. 132 00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:25,108 No. 133 00:05:25,175 --> 00:05:26,509 Yeah, it'd be a shame if you didn't. 134 00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:27,544 You think she's into me like that? 135 00:05:27,610 --> 00:05:28,777 - Yeah. - You're right. 136 00:05:28,844 --> 00:05:30,313 I'm doin' it. 137 00:05:30,380 --> 00:05:31,713 I'm doin' it. 138 00:05:33,049 --> 00:05:35,952 - Down in flames. - Roll tape. 139 00:05:36,019 --> 00:05:38,621 [snickers] Such a doofus. Look at him. 140 00:05:38,687 --> 00:05:39,956 You want my number? 141 00:05:40,023 --> 00:05:42,058 - No. - Guys, guys. 142 00:05:42,125 --> 00:05:44,427 No, guys, it looks like he's getting her number, I swear. 143 00:05:44,494 --> 00:05:48,298 I think he... I think he got her number. 144 00:05:48,364 --> 00:05:50,133 Good call, fellas. She was into me. 145 00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:51,733 But she didn't finish the phone number in time. 146 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:54,003 She started to give you her real number? 147 00:05:54,070 --> 00:05:55,271 This is a victory for us. 148 00:05:55,338 --> 00:05:57,373 - Great shit. - I gotta be honest. 149 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:58,675 I was breaking your shoes. 150 00:05:58,740 --> 00:05:59,943 I didn't think you'd get her number. 151 00:06:00,009 --> 00:06:01,710 You just rose to that challenge, okay? 152 00:06:01,777 --> 00:06:02,946 We told you to do something, you did it. 153 00:06:03,012 --> 00:06:04,614 Okay, you didn't refuse. You didn't lose. 154 00:06:04,681 --> 00:06:07,016 The ball bag on this guy. 155 00:06:07,083 --> 00:06:08,384 You ever seen a ball bag like this? 156 00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:09,919 I've never seen a ball bag like that, no. 157 00:06:09,986 --> 00:06:11,354 I've seen his ball bag. 158 00:06:11,421 --> 00:06:13,789 It's 10 pounds of ball bag in a 5-pound sack. 159 00:06:13,856 --> 00:06:16,792 This whole time, there's been two footprints in the sand. 160 00:06:16,859 --> 00:06:18,962 It's when your ball bag's been carrying us. 161 00:06:19,028 --> 00:06:22,398 You don't just talk the talk, you walk the walk. Okay? 162 00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:24,434 [Q] Who knows where great ideas come from? 163 00:06:24,500 --> 00:06:26,735 A mixture of genius and stupidity? 164 00:06:26,802 --> 00:06:29,038 A ball bag speech from Sal? 165 00:06:29,105 --> 00:06:30,673 I know it rarely happens, 166 00:06:30,739 --> 00:06:33,910 but that night, scholars and historians agree 167 00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:36,145 the Impractical Jokers were born. 168 00:06:36,212 --> 00:06:38,181 This is unbelievable, guys. 169 00:06:38,248 --> 00:06:40,250 Holy sh... [cheers and applause] 170 00:06:40,316 --> 00:06:41,750 The crowd. 171 00:06:41,817 --> 00:06:44,887 ["Forever Your Girl" playing] 172 00:06:44,954 --> 00:06:45,888 ♪ Hey, baby ♪ 173 00:06:45,955 --> 00:06:47,523 [both] Oh, my God! 174 00:06:47,590 --> 00:06:49,791 ♪ Gotta remember ♪ 175 00:06:49,859 --> 00:06:52,761 ♪ I'm forever your girl ♪ 176 00:06:52,828 --> 00:06:54,931 ♪ And baby, forever ♪ 177 00:06:54,998 --> 00:06:56,765 ♪ And ever and ever ♪ 178 00:06:56,832 --> 00:06:58,067 You know I am. 179 00:07:02,005 --> 00:07:04,507 Backstage, baby! 180 00:07:06,976 --> 00:07:09,312 [screaming] 181 00:07:15,318 --> 00:07:16,886 ♪ Baby, pick your head up ♪ 182 00:07:16,953 --> 00:07:18,988 That was the hottest thing I've ever seen! 183 00:07:19,055 --> 00:07:22,325 ♪ Come on and look me in the face ♪ 184 00:07:25,295 --> 00:07:26,562 Where's Joe? 185 00:07:26,629 --> 00:07:28,031 ♪ Is bringin' you down ♪ 186 00:07:28,097 --> 00:07:30,199 ♪ Why you down? ♪ 187 00:07:30,266 --> 00:07:32,602 - Oh, my God! - Yeah! Yeah! 188 00:07:32,669 --> 00:07:34,937 ♪ That another boy ♪ 189 00:07:35,004 --> 00:07:36,639 Get off my stage. 190 00:07:36,706 --> 00:07:38,107 - Hey, hey, hey! - Go, Joey, go! 191 00:07:38,174 --> 00:07:39,676 Yeah! We're gonna live forever! 192 00:07:39,742 --> 00:07:40,977 I know! 193 00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:43,112 Pregnant ladies, I can't hear y'all. 194 00:07:43,179 --> 00:07:45,348 Pregnant ladies, make noise. 195 00:07:47,917 --> 00:07:50,586 Helicopter. 196 00:07:50,653 --> 00:07:52,555 When I say ball, you say bag. 197 00:07:52,622 --> 00:07:53,990 Ball! [crowd booing] 198 00:07:54,057 --> 00:07:55,458 He's hyped up on the ball bag. 199 00:07:55,525 --> 00:07:57,060 [crowd jeering] 200 00:07:57,126 --> 00:07:58,861 Get him off the stage. 201 00:07:58,928 --> 00:07:59,996 Hype it up. 202 00:08:00,063 --> 00:08:02,398 We judged too soon. He sucks. 203 00:08:02,465 --> 00:08:04,967 [music stops] 204 00:08:05,034 --> 00:08:07,270 White people! 205 00:08:07,337 --> 00:08:08,471 Blacks! 206 00:08:08,538 --> 00:08:09,972 [crowd jeering] 207 00:08:10,039 --> 00:08:12,442 Where the Vietnamese at? 208 00:08:12,508 --> 00:08:14,744 - Yeah, there's one! - Where's my security? 209 00:08:14,811 --> 00:08:17,080 [crowd clamoring] 210 00:08:17,146 --> 00:08:19,182 This is mayhem. [yelps] 211 00:08:19,248 --> 00:08:20,550 Ah! Son of a... [glass shattering] 212 00:08:20,616 --> 00:08:22,452 - All right! - They throwin' garbage? 213 00:08:22,518 --> 00:08:24,253 [together] Staten Island garbage. 214 00:08:24,320 --> 00:08:26,289 - Guys! Guys! - Look out, Joe! 215 00:08:26,356 --> 00:08:27,857 Breach! Breach! Breach! 216 00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:29,359 Ah, these punks are storming the stage. 217 00:08:29,425 --> 00:08:30,593 I'm getting the hell out of here. 218 00:08:30,660 --> 00:08:31,861 No, no, no, no! 219 00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:37,300 Oh! 220 00:08:37,367 --> 00:08:39,135 [laughter] 221 00:08:39,202 --> 00:08:40,737 I got clotheslined by Abdul. 222 00:08:40,803 --> 00:08:42,271 Oh, Sal! 223 00:08:44,040 --> 00:08:45,608 My beautiful boy. 224 00:08:45,675 --> 00:08:47,643 She crushed my windpipe! 225 00:08:47,710 --> 00:08:48,878 You're okay. Go, go! 226 00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:50,646 - Joey! - Go. 227 00:08:50,713 --> 00:08:52,181 You guys are dead. 228 00:08:52,248 --> 00:08:53,549 Dead. 229 00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:56,919 One day, I'm gonna find you, and I will destroy you! 230 00:08:58,221 --> 00:08:59,589 [fire alarm ringing] 231 00:08:59,655 --> 00:09:01,524 [Wolfmother's "Joker and the Thief" playing] 232 00:09:01,591 --> 00:09:03,593 Can't believe we ruined the Abdul concert. 233 00:09:03,659 --> 00:09:05,027 [coughing] 234 00:09:05,094 --> 00:09:07,663 - Hi, Gina. - Go, go, go. 235 00:09:07,730 --> 00:09:11,401 We've lost the arena! We've lost the arena! 236 00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:14,837 Everything's fine. Everything's fine. 237 00:09:14,904 --> 00:09:17,974 [people screaming, clamoring] 238 00:09:19,542 --> 00:09:23,780 Abdul assaulted me! She's about 4'4", 40 pounds. 239 00:09:23,846 --> 00:09:25,982 [all clamoring] 240 00:09:26,048 --> 00:09:28,518 Ah! Why are you doing this to me? 241 00:09:28,584 --> 00:09:31,254 Come on! Abdul's got some mouth on her. 242 00:09:39,729 --> 00:09:41,564 ♪ So I'll tell you all the story ♪ 243 00:09:41,631 --> 00:09:44,000 ♪ About the joker and the thief in the night ♪ 244 00:09:50,940 --> 00:09:52,408 [upbeat rock music] 245 00:09:52,475 --> 00:09:54,577 - [Sal] Are we rolling? - [Joe] Okay, here we go. 246 00:09:54,644 --> 00:09:56,412 [Joe] Once we clear this camera, Sal, we're ready to go. 247 00:09:56,479 --> 00:09:57,814 It's only... Our close-up keeps getting blocked. 248 00:09:57,881 --> 00:10:00,416 Cameras. Cameras. 249 00:10:00,483 --> 00:10:02,118 We have to make sure camera D stays that way. 250 00:10:02,185 --> 00:10:03,553 Hold on, I got two... I got three... In the ear, 251 00:10:03,619 --> 00:10:05,121 I had multiple people at one time. 252 00:10:05,188 --> 00:10:07,223 [Joe] Now he's clear. 253 00:10:07,290 --> 00:10:09,392 - So, Sal's just gonna be a horrible mall Santa. - [Murr] That's right. 254 00:10:09,459 --> 00:10:12,395 There's nothing more American than a mall Santa. 255 00:10:12,462 --> 00:10:14,030 - That's right. - Right? It's just classic. 256 00:10:14,096 --> 00:10:15,665 - Yeah. - Well, in the winter. 257 00:10:15,731 --> 00:10:18,234 [Q] I will say this, Sal, you have accepted the fact 258 00:10:18,301 --> 00:10:20,002 that we dressed you as a mall Santa 259 00:10:20,069 --> 00:10:21,872 in the middle of summer without complaint. 260 00:10:21,939 --> 00:10:24,240 - It's about 100 degrees out. - [laughs] 261 00:10:24,307 --> 00:10:26,008 Oh, I'm gonna... I'm gonna pass out. 262 00:10:26,075 --> 00:10:27,743 Well, you're about to ruin Christmas 263 00:10:27,810 --> 00:10:29,512 for a bunch of kids, Sal. 264 00:10:29,579 --> 00:10:31,347 [Joe] Okay, Sal, when this kid approaches, this is easy, 265 00:10:31,414 --> 00:10:33,683 just yell, "No! No!" 266 00:10:33,749 --> 00:10:35,184 No! No! 267 00:10:35,251 --> 00:10:37,855 - [laughter] - No. 268 00:10:37,921 --> 00:10:39,188 So what do you want, Aiden? 269 00:10:39,255 --> 00:10:40,723 Do you want a big toy or a little toy? 270 00:10:40,790 --> 00:10:42,992 What would you like? I'll get it for you right now. 271 00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:45,995 [stammering] Lightning McQueen. 272 00:10:46,062 --> 00:10:47,163 - Sal, fall asleep. - Fall asleep, Sal. 273 00:10:47,230 --> 00:10:48,598 Fall asleep, fall asleep. 274 00:10:52,134 --> 00:10:53,669 - Santa? - [laughter] 275 00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:55,838 - [snores] - Sal's sleeping. Look at him. 276 00:10:55,906 --> 00:10:57,240 - Look at the kid. - [laughter] 277 00:10:57,306 --> 00:10:59,742 - Sal fell asleep. - [Q] The shot's insane, Sal. 278 00:10:59,809 --> 00:11:01,010 [light music] 279 00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:05,348 - [Joe] Sal, stay there. - [laughter] 280 00:11:05,414 --> 00:11:07,216 Head's... Head nod down there more. 281 00:11:07,283 --> 00:11:08,451 There you go. 282 00:11:08,518 --> 00:11:11,287 - [Q] Big snores. Big... - [snoring] 283 00:11:11,354 --> 00:11:13,322 - [clattering] - Ooh! 284 00:11:13,389 --> 00:11:15,391 - Start bouncing him. - Oh. 285 00:11:15,458 --> 00:11:17,226 - "When'd you get here?" - [Murr] Higher, buddy, higher. 286 00:11:17,293 --> 00:11:18,896 - [upbeat music] - Yeah! 287 00:11:18,962 --> 00:11:21,497 [laughter] 288 00:11:21,564 --> 00:11:24,033 [Murr] Oh, taking his leg off! He's taking his leg off! 289 00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,801 He's so happy. 290 00:11:25,869 --> 00:11:28,771 [laughter] 291 00:11:33,409 --> 00:11:35,411 [Joe] Look at the... [laughs] 292 00:11:36,479 --> 00:11:37,713 High five! 293 00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:39,181 [all] Aww. 294 00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:42,618 This fake snow can't be helping. 295 00:11:42,685 --> 00:11:43,887 [laughing] 296 00:11:43,954 --> 00:11:46,155 Hello, darling. How are you? 297 00:11:46,222 --> 00:11:49,292 - Come sit on Santa's lap. - [chuckles] 298 00:11:49,358 --> 00:11:51,394 - And what is your name? - Casey. 299 00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:53,763 Casey, I want you to take a minute 300 00:11:53,829 --> 00:11:56,967 and think about what you might want for Christmas this year. 301 00:11:57,034 --> 00:11:58,334 Just think about it in your head. 302 00:11:58,401 --> 00:12:00,169 - Okay? - Uh... 303 00:12:00,236 --> 00:12:01,304 [laughter] 304 00:12:01,370 --> 00:12:02,672 "Don't talk to me till I tell you." 305 00:12:02,738 --> 00:12:05,141 Now, don't talk until I tell you, Casey. 306 00:12:05,207 --> 00:12:06,642 - Mmm-hmm. - Okay. 307 00:12:08,678 --> 00:12:13,716 - "Now, why aren't you saying anything to Santa?" - [laughter] 308 00:12:13,783 --> 00:12:15,852 I don't have all day, Casey. Do you know what you want? 309 00:12:15,919 --> 00:12:17,119 - Yes. - Okay. 310 00:12:17,186 --> 00:12:18,889 Don't speak until I tell you, now. 311 00:12:18,956 --> 00:12:20,423 [Joe] She's so cute. 312 00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:21,757 Whenever you're ready, just tell me what you want. 313 00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:22,926 [Joe] Keep flip-flopping. 314 00:12:22,993 --> 00:12:23,826 But don't talk until I tell you. 315 00:12:23,894 --> 00:12:25,428 [laughter] 316 00:12:25,494 --> 00:12:27,129 Okay? So whenever you're ready, you tell me what you want. 317 00:12:27,196 --> 00:12:30,132 But please don't speak until I tell you. 318 00:12:30,199 --> 00:12:31,434 - Whenever you're ready. - Okay. 319 00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:33,302 Just don't speak until I say. 320 00:12:34,037 --> 00:12:35,872 [laughter] 321 00:12:35,939 --> 00:12:37,206 Nice to meet you... 322 00:12:37,273 --> 00:12:38,507 So, Sal, how was that? You're doing... 323 00:12:38,574 --> 00:12:39,910 You're being a very good horrible Santa. 324 00:12:39,977 --> 00:12:42,545 [sighs] Guys, this... It's torture for us all. 325 00:12:42,612 --> 00:12:44,447 It's a torture for me, it's a torture for you, 326 00:12:44,513 --> 00:12:46,115 it's a torture for the children. 327 00:12:46,182 --> 00:12:47,851 - I'm having a blast back here. - Yeah. 328 00:12:47,918 --> 00:12:49,752 I'm giggling with my friends. It feels pretty good back here. 329 00:12:49,819 --> 00:12:52,254 There's no less than 40 strands of hair in my mouth. 330 00:12:52,321 --> 00:12:53,789 [Q] Oh, it's getting worse, Sal. 331 00:12:53,857 --> 00:12:57,727 - Oh! - [laughs] 332 00:12:57,793 --> 00:12:58,862 [laughter] 333 00:13:02,832 --> 00:13:05,936 [laughter] 334 00:13:06,003 --> 00:13:09,305 - Jingle, jingle. - [laughing] 335 00:13:10,941 --> 00:13:12,241 - Oh. - I've had enough. 336 00:13:12,308 --> 00:13:13,175 I'm pulling the plug on this whole thing. 337 00:13:13,242 --> 00:13:14,443 Let's get out of here. 338 00:13:14,510 --> 00:13:16,880 - That's a cut. - Nice work. 339 00:13:23,419 --> 00:13:26,522 [light music playing, low chatter] 340 00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:30,459 [tapping] 341 00:13:35,464 --> 00:13:36,967 Where's the Cheddar Bay Biscuits? 342 00:13:37,034 --> 00:13:38,501 I ordered a whole another basket, like, ten minutes ago. 343 00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:40,070 - You already had six. - So what? 344 00:13:40,137 --> 00:13:41,837 - [Joe] You're cut off. - [Murr] You can't be cut off. 345 00:13:41,905 --> 00:13:43,706 It's unlimited, it's the whole point of Red Lobster. 346 00:13:43,773 --> 00:13:45,174 Guys. Guys. 347 00:13:46,308 --> 00:13:48,979 - Is that Abdul? - Kareem? 348 00:13:49,046 --> 00:13:50,646 No. Can't be. 349 00:13:50,713 --> 00:13:52,782 - [Sal] That's Abdul. That's her. - That's her. 350 00:13:52,848 --> 00:13:54,684 - Oh, my God. - [Sal] It is Abdul. 351 00:13:54,750 --> 00:13:57,020 I know Abdul when I see it. It's her! I'm scared right now. 352 00:13:57,087 --> 00:13:59,355 My windpipe is still sore from when she hit me. 353 00:13:59,422 --> 00:14:00,589 Yeah, she straight jacked you. 354 00:14:00,656 --> 00:14:02,159 She's gonna remember that night. 355 00:14:02,224 --> 00:14:03,426 Oh, she's coming over here, so it's curtains for us, 356 00:14:03,492 --> 00:14:04,727 essentially, it's what it is. 357 00:14:04,794 --> 00:14:06,595 - I gotta get out of here. - No, no! Sit... 358 00:14:06,662 --> 00:14:07,396 Sit down. 359 00:14:07,463 --> 00:14:08,798 This is our Red Lobster. 360 00:14:08,865 --> 00:14:10,332 I've been training for this for 20 years. 361 00:14:10,399 --> 00:14:12,601 Nobody touches you again. Not on my watch. 362 00:14:12,668 --> 00:14:14,104 - Okay, thank you. - No, yeah. 363 00:14:14,171 --> 00:14:15,638 - Just sit down. - She's coming right over here. 364 00:14:15,705 --> 00:14:17,239 - Act casual. - She's looking right at us. 365 00:14:17,306 --> 00:14:18,340 - Act casual. - She's looking... 366 00:14:18,407 --> 00:14:20,209 Smile. Act natural. 367 00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:21,677 Smile. Smile. 368 00:14:21,744 --> 00:14:23,212 [tense music] 369 00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:24,547 All right. 370 00:14:27,851 --> 00:14:29,251 Fifteen feet. 371 00:14:29,318 --> 00:14:30,820 Ten feet. 372 00:14:30,887 --> 00:14:31,988 Five feet. 373 00:14:32,055 --> 00:14:33,056 Abdul. 374 00:14:33,123 --> 00:14:34,423 You're the Impractical Jokers. 375 00:14:34,490 --> 00:14:36,392 - Yeah. - For real? 376 00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:38,427 - [both] Yeah. - [Abdul] Holy shit. 377 00:14:38,494 --> 00:14:41,363 - Okay. - I love you guys. 378 00:14:41,430 --> 00:14:44,233 Oh, no joke, man. I've watched every season. 379 00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:46,435 Well, except for season five. 380 00:14:46,502 --> 00:14:47,536 Yeah, I don't want to get into it. 381 00:14:47,603 --> 00:14:49,072 All right, well, thank you. 382 00:14:49,139 --> 00:14:51,407 By any chance, you guys gonna be in Miami next week? 383 00:14:51,474 --> 00:14:53,375 - Yeah. - I'm having this huge party. 384 00:14:53,442 --> 00:14:55,311 You guys can come. You can hang one night. 385 00:14:55,377 --> 00:14:57,047 You can hang the weekend. Go hang out. 386 00:14:57,114 --> 00:14:58,347 - Oh, my God. - What? 387 00:14:58,414 --> 00:14:59,715 - You kidding me? - [knife clatters] 388 00:14:59,782 --> 00:15:01,184 Yeah, we'll be there. We were gonna go... 389 00:15:01,250 --> 00:15:02,618 - We were going anyway. - Yeah! Yeah! 390 00:15:02,685 --> 00:15:04,320 Yes! 391 00:15:04,386 --> 00:15:06,756 Sam? Hook 'em up. 392 00:15:10,459 --> 00:15:13,496 - Season five was atrocious. - Mmm. 393 00:15:13,562 --> 00:15:15,331 So I'll see you in Miami? 394 00:15:15,397 --> 00:15:16,332 [all] Yes! Yeah, I'll see you there. 395 00:15:16,398 --> 00:15:17,934 This is crazy. 396 00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:19,535 Yeah, that's right. We are so in Miami. 397 00:15:19,602 --> 00:15:20,971 - We'll see you there. - All right. 398 00:15:21,037 --> 00:15:23,305 - Miami, here we come. - [laughs] All right. 399 00:15:23,372 --> 00:15:24,673 We're not really going to Miami, are we? 400 00:15:24,740 --> 00:15:25,841 - Of course we're going to Miami. - No. 401 00:15:25,909 --> 00:15:27,476 That night was a disaster. Okay? 402 00:15:27,543 --> 00:15:29,612 We have a chance here for a do-over. 403 00:15:29,678 --> 00:15:32,515 I don't need a do-over. I'm the victim, okay? 404 00:15:32,581 --> 00:15:33,950 She punched me in the throat. 405 00:15:34,017 --> 00:15:35,818 Guys, this isn't even a discussion, okay? 406 00:15:35,886 --> 00:15:38,487 Abdul is here in the Lobster, she invites us to the party, 407 00:15:38,554 --> 00:15:40,056 we go to the party. 408 00:15:40,123 --> 00:15:42,324 We turn back the clock. We put that disaster to bed. 409 00:15:42,391 --> 00:15:43,860 Oh, yeah. We're going, and this time, 410 00:15:43,927 --> 00:15:45,962 we're gonna prove that we're not gonna screw it up. 411 00:15:46,029 --> 00:15:47,964 That's right. With a little bit of hype. 412 00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:49,532 - [both] Mmm. - No hype. 413 00:15:49,598 --> 00:15:51,201 - A little bit. - Mmm. No. 414 00:15:51,268 --> 00:15:52,468 All right, the appropriate amount. 415 00:15:52,535 --> 00:15:53,937 Hmm, no. Less. 416 00:15:54,004 --> 00:15:56,039 Do this. That. 417 00:15:56,106 --> 00:15:58,307 Oh, I'm bringing this much, and if we use it, we use it. 418 00:15:58,374 --> 00:16:00,409 Oh, my God, there's only three. 419 00:16:00,476 --> 00:16:01,677 There's only three laminates. 420 00:16:01,744 --> 00:16:03,445 Perfect. I'm out. God's plan. 421 00:16:03,512 --> 00:16:04,915 No, no, no. What are you talking about? 422 00:16:04,981 --> 00:16:07,349 We'll settle this the way we do every big decision 423 00:16:07,416 --> 00:16:08,985 in our life, okay? 424 00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:10,619 The four of us will compete in hidden camera challenges 425 00:16:10,686 --> 00:16:12,022 on the way down to Miami, 426 00:16:12,088 --> 00:16:14,490 and the loser does not go to that party. 427 00:16:15,892 --> 00:16:17,526 [rock music] 428 00:16:17,593 --> 00:16:19,129 - Road trip, guys! - Let's do it. 429 00:16:19,196 --> 00:16:20,329 Let's just get in the car and do it. 430 00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:21,564 - Road trip, baby. - Yeah! 431 00:16:21,630 --> 00:16:23,233 Guys, I have the perfect car. 432 00:16:23,300 --> 00:16:25,035 - You guys are gonna love this. - [Murr] Oh, thank God, yes. 433 00:16:25,101 --> 00:16:27,703 Every part of my body is rejecting this plan. 434 00:16:27,770 --> 00:16:28,838 Who pays the bill, by the way? 435 00:16:28,905 --> 00:16:31,208 I pay the bill? I pay the bill? 436 00:16:31,274 --> 00:16:34,743 [upbeat hip-hop music] 437 00:16:42,751 --> 00:16:43,619 Huh? 438 00:16:44,587 --> 00:16:46,089 - Shotgun. - What? No! 439 00:16:46,156 --> 00:16:47,690 Yeah, I saw it, and I said it. 440 00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:49,025 - That's not even right. - [Joe] Yeah, that's the rule. 441 00:16:49,092 --> 00:16:50,426 I get carsick. I can't sit back there. 442 00:16:50,492 --> 00:16:51,694 Your carsick is not my problem. 443 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:52,963 - [Murr] No. - Will you guys... 444 00:16:53,029 --> 00:16:54,064 Please, please, can you veto this? 445 00:16:54,130 --> 00:16:55,165 I will vomit everywhere. 446 00:16:55,232 --> 00:16:56,398 Veto it? Why would I veto that? 447 00:16:56,465 --> 00:16:57,833 It's the rules of shotgun. 448 00:16:57,901 --> 00:16:59,535 You see the car, you say, "Shotgun," you sit there. 449 00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:01,370 Joe gets shotgun 'cause he respects the leather. 450 00:17:01,437 --> 00:17:02,538 - Thank you, sir. - Hey, what... 451 00:17:02,605 --> 00:17:04,107 Whatever gave you the impression 452 00:17:04,174 --> 00:17:05,808 - I didn't respect it? - You scuffed the leather, man. 453 00:17:05,876 --> 00:17:08,644 That's like punching Grandma Lucia in her face. 454 00:17:08,711 --> 00:17:10,113 She killed herself in the back left seat, right? 455 00:17:10,180 --> 00:17:12,514 Why don't we all get off our high horses here? 456 00:17:12,581 --> 00:17:13,782 All right, it's not that great of a car. 457 00:17:13,849 --> 00:17:15,517 - It's not a Corvette. - No, I know. 458 00:17:15,584 --> 00:17:17,120 It's a Crown Vic. I know what this car is. 459 00:17:17,187 --> 00:17:18,955 I mean, it's the vehicular equivalent of Baltic Avenue. 460 00:17:19,022 --> 00:17:20,056 Baltic Avenue? 461 00:17:20,123 --> 00:17:21,657 What are you, going Monopoly on me? 462 00:17:21,724 --> 00:17:23,692 You're the thimble. Yeah, and do not pass go. 463 00:17:23,759 --> 00:17:25,761 You go directly to the back seat, buddy. 464 00:17:25,828 --> 00:17:27,830 I feel like I'm being sandbagged. 465 00:17:27,898 --> 00:17:29,698 Question, should I take a quick shit here or should I... 466 00:17:29,765 --> 00:17:31,634 - Would you guys just get in the car already? - Okay. 467 00:17:32,835 --> 00:17:34,803 ♪ Hey, baby ♪ 468 00:17:34,871 --> 00:17:37,107 ♪ You gotta remember ♪ 469 00:17:38,407 --> 00:17:40,409 - [Joe] The trip it is. - Whoo-hoo! 470 00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:42,012 - Yeah! - Oh, you know what? 471 00:17:42,078 --> 00:17:42,946 [music stops] 472 00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:46,049 - Ho! - Oh! 473 00:17:46,116 --> 00:17:47,716 [all] Stacy! 474 00:17:47,783 --> 00:17:49,618 Yo, baby, all right. 475 00:17:49,685 --> 00:17:51,288 - Now we're ready. - Now we're ready. 476 00:17:51,354 --> 00:17:53,189 - Let's do this. - Let's go! 477 00:17:53,256 --> 00:17:57,693 ♪ Come on And look me in the face ♪ 478 00:17:57,760 --> 00:18:00,897 ♪ 'Cause I can tell That something ♪ 479 00:18:00,964 --> 00:18:03,565 ♪ Is bringing you down ♪ 480 00:18:03,632 --> 00:18:05,168 ♪ Bringing you down ♪ 481 00:18:05,235 --> 00:18:09,906 ♪ Is it the rumor That another girl ♪ 482 00:18:09,973 --> 00:18:12,741 ♪ Wants to take your place ♪ 483 00:18:12,808 --> 00:18:14,710 ♪ I think She's after your heart ♪ 484 00:18:14,777 --> 00:18:17,314 ♪ Well, I've been hearing The stories ♪ 485 00:18:17,380 --> 00:18:19,715 ♪ They're going around ♪ 486 00:18:19,782 --> 00:18:21,717 ♪ All of my friends are taken ♪ 487 00:18:21,784 --> 00:18:23,552 ♪ Hey, baby ♪ 488 00:18:26,022 --> 00:18:27,057 Oh, son! 489 00:18:27,123 --> 00:18:28,624 - If they have a... - I think I have one. 490 00:18:28,691 --> 00:18:30,093 - What's up, bro? - Welcome. 491 00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:32,461 - Grizzly Adams. - Oh, we should play Megaballs. 492 00:18:32,528 --> 00:18:34,364 - Who? - Oh, you got that Megaballs? 493 00:18:34,431 --> 00:18:35,899 - What? - [laughs] 494 00:18:35,966 --> 00:18:38,234 Talk to me about your collection of jazz, smooth. 495 00:18:38,301 --> 00:18:40,070 I don't know, man, there's, like, two aisles. 496 00:18:40,136 --> 00:18:42,538 - Which one? - Dude, I just work here. 497 00:18:42,604 --> 00:18:43,974 That's why I'm asking you. 498 00:18:45,275 --> 00:18:46,910 - Oh. - Ooh. 499 00:18:49,611 --> 00:18:51,114 - Let me ask you guys something. - Hmm? 500 00:18:51,181 --> 00:18:52,949 You guys ever wonder what Murray gets up to 501 00:18:53,016 --> 00:18:55,018 - when we're not with him? - I would love to know. 502 00:18:55,085 --> 00:18:56,552 We've been friends with him my whole life. 503 00:18:56,618 --> 00:18:58,221 I go to sleep wondering what he does. 504 00:18:58,288 --> 00:19:00,156 - Hmm. - I got ideas. 505 00:19:00,223 --> 00:19:01,291 - Yeah? - Tell me. 506 00:19:01,358 --> 00:19:02,624 - He traveled a lot. - Yeah. 507 00:19:02,691 --> 00:19:04,526 That time he went on that tour with Yanni 508 00:19:04,593 --> 00:19:06,162 in South America. 509 00:19:06,229 --> 00:19:07,763 The Rainbows to Rainforest Tour, I remember that. 510 00:19:07,830 --> 00:19:09,366 Yeah, but he kept using air quotes with that. 511 00:19:09,432 --> 00:19:10,733 - He did that with you? - Yeah, 512 00:19:10,799 --> 00:19:13,103 like, "If you need me, I'll be with Yanni 513 00:19:13,169 --> 00:19:14,437 in South America." 514 00:19:14,536 --> 00:19:15,838 Now, what does that mean? 515 00:19:15,905 --> 00:19:18,041 Every part of that sentence is a fallacy? 516 00:19:19,442 --> 00:19:20,609 "I-I'll be unavailable." 517 00:19:20,676 --> 00:19:21,911 - [laughs] Whoa. - What is that? 518 00:19:21,978 --> 00:19:23,480 It's air quotes. We're all doing it. 519 00:19:23,545 --> 00:19:24,948 - No, no, no. What's that? - Unavailable. It's air quotes. 520 00:19:25,015 --> 00:19:26,449 You're not calling four people over, 521 00:19:26,515 --> 00:19:27,516 you gotta flip that and reverse it. 522 00:19:27,583 --> 00:19:28,751 Oh, all right, Missy Elliott. 523 00:19:28,817 --> 00:19:30,053 - I wasn't sure. Got it. - Fellas? 524 00:19:30,120 --> 00:19:31,520 - Yo? - Got it. 525 00:19:33,555 --> 00:19:35,959 Right? For the road. For the road? 526 00:19:36,026 --> 00:19:37,027 Right? 527 00:19:38,761 --> 00:19:39,762 I don't need him. 528 00:19:39,828 --> 00:19:42,932 [upbeat rock music] 529 00:19:53,642 --> 00:19:55,178 [Q] DC, baby. 530 00:19:57,846 --> 00:19:59,315 [Sal] So today, we're stopping people 531 00:19:59,382 --> 00:20:00,783 and telling them we gotta speak at a memorial. 532 00:20:00,849 --> 00:20:02,651 The only thing is that we've written... 533 00:20:02,718 --> 00:20:04,187 - Each other's. - Each other's eulogies. 534 00:20:04,254 --> 00:20:05,687 So, at the end, we'll have to ask them, 535 00:20:05,754 --> 00:20:07,190 "Do you think it's fit to say?" 536 00:20:07,257 --> 00:20:10,193 And if they say no, we lose. If they say yes, we win. 537 00:20:10,260 --> 00:20:12,062 [sighs] It's a sad day. 538 00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:13,463 [laughs] 539 00:20:13,530 --> 00:20:16,900 This just shows you how fleeting life is, guys. 540 00:20:16,966 --> 00:20:18,101 [Joe] How about this old guy? 541 00:20:19,035 --> 00:20:20,636 [Murr] You got the right idea. 542 00:20:20,702 --> 00:20:22,539 - Ooh, too many steps. - Can't handle it. 543 00:20:22,604 --> 00:20:24,074 You just, you guys are in town just visiting 544 00:20:24,140 --> 00:20:25,774 - for the tours, the sights? - Yeah. 545 00:20:25,841 --> 00:20:27,210 [Q] Look at the urn. 546 00:20:27,277 --> 00:20:28,912 I'm in town, unfortunately, for sad reasons. 547 00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:30,712 - Got a, um... - Bucket of ashes right here. 548 00:20:30,779 --> 00:20:32,248 - I'm giving the eulogy. - Oh. 549 00:20:32,315 --> 00:20:33,749 Yeah, at a funeral. 550 00:20:33,816 --> 00:20:35,717 He got a great mark. This guy's so into the idea. 551 00:20:35,784 --> 00:20:38,121 We're doing the thing by the water and spreading the ashes, you know. 552 00:20:38,188 --> 00:20:39,522 Oh, yeah. 553 00:20:39,588 --> 00:20:41,357 ., 00:20:43,026 Is that why people come to the reflection pool, though? 555 00:20:43,093 --> 00:20:44,726 I'm pretty sure you're not allowed to even do that. 556 00:20:44,793 --> 00:20:45,962 Can I run the eulogy by you? It takes one second. 557 00:20:46,029 --> 00:20:47,163 It's only a couple sentences long. 558 00:20:47,230 --> 00:20:49,332 You're very brave for doing that. 559 00:20:49,399 --> 00:20:50,699 Here's the eulogy I wrote. 560 00:20:50,766 --> 00:20:52,502 "Grandma." [clears throat] 561 00:20:52,569 --> 00:20:53,802 "Grandma was... 562 00:20:53,870 --> 00:20:55,704 Grandma was a straight up bitch." 563 00:20:55,771 --> 00:20:57,606 [laughter] 564 00:20:57,673 --> 00:20:59,876 "You know it, Grandpa. We all know it. 565 00:20:59,943 --> 00:21:01,144 And now she's dead 566 00:21:01,211 --> 00:21:03,046 and we've got her goddamn money. 567 00:21:03,113 --> 00:21:04,813 Let's go to China Buffet to celebrate 568 00:21:04,881 --> 00:21:06,449 this bitch's one-way ticket to hell." 569 00:21:06,516 --> 00:21:07,749 - [laughter] - Wow. 570 00:21:07,816 --> 00:21:08,952 What do you think? Is it ready to go? 571 00:21:09,018 --> 00:21:10,487 [laughs] 572 00:21:10,553 --> 00:21:12,956 I don't know what other people would think about that. 573 00:21:13,022 --> 00:21:14,524 We all felt this way about Grandma. 574 00:21:14,591 --> 00:21:15,558 - Oh. - We all did. 575 00:21:15,624 --> 00:21:17,260 Including Grandpa. 576 00:21:17,327 --> 00:21:18,561 So you think I should just read this or should I change it? 577 00:21:18,627 --> 00:21:19,996 [laughs] I don't... I wouldn't. 578 00:21:20,063 --> 00:21:21,264 - You wouldn't read it? - No. 579 00:21:21,331 --> 00:21:23,566 [all] Oh! [laughter] 580 00:21:23,632 --> 00:21:24,567 I'm not good with public speaking. 581 00:21:24,633 --> 00:21:25,734 Forget the urn. Walk away. 582 00:21:25,801 --> 00:21:27,103 All right. Well, take care, sir. 583 00:21:27,170 --> 00:21:28,837 - Have a great vacation. Enjoy. - Yeah. 584 00:21:28,905 --> 00:21:30,507 - Take care, now. - You bet. 585 00:21:30,573 --> 00:21:31,574 What do you want with this? 586 00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:34,410 [laughter] 587 00:21:34,477 --> 00:21:35,811 Sir? 588 00:21:37,046 --> 00:21:38,047 [laughs] 589 00:21:42,952 --> 00:21:43,887 [buzzer blares] 590 00:21:43,953 --> 00:21:46,456 [birds calling] 591 00:21:46,523 --> 00:21:48,158 Guys, can I ask you a question? 592 00:21:48,224 --> 00:21:49,259 Here we go. 593 00:21:49,325 --> 00:21:50,894 It's just a few words. I'm very nervous. 594 00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:52,562 Can I read it to you just to say it out loud 595 00:21:52,629 --> 00:21:54,097 - and tell me if you like it? - Sure. 596 00:21:54,164 --> 00:21:55,731 I'm so nervous. The family's meeting me. Yeah. 597 00:21:55,797 --> 00:21:58,535 Okay, uh, "Thank you all for coming 598 00:21:58,601 --> 00:22:01,871 to the spreading of the ashes of Joey Dumps." 599 00:22:01,938 --> 00:22:03,206 - Joey Dumps. - Joey Dumps. 600 00:22:03,273 --> 00:22:04,974 "What could be said about Joey Dumps? 601 00:22:05,041 --> 00:22:06,509 He took his lumps." 602 00:22:06,576 --> 00:22:08,111 [laughter] 603 00:22:08,178 --> 00:22:09,546 "Joey Dumps was there for me. 604 00:22:09,612 --> 00:22:11,147 He let me see those dumps. 605 00:22:11,214 --> 00:22:13,049 - Dumps-da-dumps-dumps-dumps." - [laughter] 606 00:22:13,116 --> 00:22:14,284 "When you were down in the dumps, 607 00:22:14,350 --> 00:22:16,019 who was there for you... Joey Dumps. 608 00:22:16,085 --> 00:22:17,487 Dumps like a truck, truck, truck." 609 00:22:17,554 --> 00:22:18,855 [laughter] 610 00:22:18,922 --> 00:22:20,924 "Guys like a what, what, what. 611 00:22:20,990 --> 00:22:24,661 So to honor his last wish, we now dump Dumps' ashes, 612 00:22:24,726 --> 00:22:26,529 and then go listen to the final episode 613 00:22:26,596 --> 00:22:28,364 of his baseball-themed podcast, 614 00:22:28,431 --> 00:22:31,434 'Joey Dumps Humps Chump Umps in the Rumps.'" 615 00:22:31,501 --> 00:22:33,336 [laughter] 616 00:22:33,403 --> 00:22:35,939 - [Q] It's so Joey Dumps. - It's very Joey Dumps. 617 00:22:36,005 --> 00:22:37,706 - Do you think it... - It's very funny. 618 00:22:37,773 --> 00:22:39,876 - Should I change anything? - No. 619 00:22:39,943 --> 00:22:41,444 - No? Ah. - Oh! 620 00:22:41,511 --> 00:22:43,845 - It's a great memorial. - Thank you very much. 621 00:22:43,913 --> 00:22:45,682 - I appreciate you guys. - Thank you. Good luck. 622 00:22:45,747 --> 00:22:47,550 - Thank you. - He was a big Sisqó fan. 623 00:22:47,617 --> 00:22:48,985 Wow. Ready to go. 624 00:22:49,052 --> 00:22:51,588 - Good job with that, Sal. - [Murr] Sal with a W. 625 00:22:51,654 --> 00:22:52,821 My eulogy game, I crush. 626 00:22:52,889 --> 00:22:54,023 I give a good eulogy. 627 00:22:57,393 --> 00:22:58,561 [Joe] You guys ready? 628 00:22:58,628 --> 00:23:00,163 [Murr] Yeah, the cameras aren't on, but... 629 00:23:00,230 --> 00:23:01,297 [Joe] How we doing? Cameras aren't ready yet? 630 00:23:01,364 --> 00:23:02,932 Guys, the secret is to... 631 00:23:04,300 --> 00:23:07,537 pique interest, pique the curiosity of people. 632 00:23:07,604 --> 00:23:09,606 Could you just hold this up, and I'm just gonna... 633 00:23:09,672 --> 00:23:11,341 Yeah, just hold that up, yeah, like that, it's perfect. 634 00:23:11,407 --> 00:23:12,942 [laughing] 635 00:23:13,009 --> 00:23:14,877 They're holding ashes. 636 00:23:14,944 --> 00:23:16,179 There we go. That's great. 637 00:23:16,246 --> 00:23:17,779 - Yeah, I'm here for a memorial. - Oh. 638 00:23:17,846 --> 00:23:21,017 So I'm about to give a eulogy, um, about this. 639 00:23:21,084 --> 00:23:22,685 So I'm just getting prepared. 640 00:23:22,751 --> 00:23:24,387 You mind if I just say it out loud to you guys real quick? 641 00:23:24,454 --> 00:23:26,489 - Sure. Go on. - Yeah. Hold her. Thanks. 642 00:23:26,556 --> 00:23:27,657 [Joe] Okay. 643 00:23:27,724 --> 00:23:28,691 Sometimes he makes it look easy. 644 00:23:28,757 --> 00:23:30,792 "This that eulogy. You know. 645 00:23:30,860 --> 00:23:32,695 You know what it is, gang, gang. 646 00:23:32,761 --> 00:23:34,731 Devin died. He got got." 647 00:23:34,796 --> 00:23:35,965 [laughter] 648 00:23:36,032 --> 00:23:37,467 "He got shot. He loved life. 649 00:23:37,533 --> 00:23:38,901 He loved wife, my wife. 650 00:23:38,968 --> 00:23:41,204 I shot that mother. Eleven shots in the leg." 651 00:23:41,271 --> 00:23:42,905 - In the leg? - "I ain't supposed to be here, 652 00:23:42,972 --> 00:23:44,741 but y'all know what? Y'all can scratch. 653 00:23:44,806 --> 00:23:46,609 I came here to see him put down 654 00:23:46,676 --> 00:23:47,710 - and piss on the grave." - Oh! 655 00:23:47,776 --> 00:23:49,712 [laughter] 656 00:23:49,778 --> 00:23:52,415 That's when I would take... Expose myself and start peeing. 657 00:23:52,482 --> 00:23:54,150 - "Expose myself and..." - And then remember 658 00:23:54,217 --> 00:23:56,085 to drink a lot of water prior, as a note to myself. 659 00:23:56,152 --> 00:23:58,621 And then escape out the southeast exit... 660 00:23:58,688 --> 00:24:00,023 - [Q] Escape. - Of the cemetery. 661 00:24:00,089 --> 00:24:01,457 And it's a right on red. 662 00:24:01,524 --> 00:24:02,592 [laughter] 663 00:24:02,659 --> 00:24:03,960 So that's how I would do that. 664 00:24:04,027 --> 00:24:05,862 - Way too extreme. - Is it too extreme? 665 00:24:05,928 --> 00:24:08,398 [both] Oh! 666 00:24:08,464 --> 00:24:09,632 Yes! 667 00:24:09,699 --> 00:24:11,100 I should probably just say he was a good guy. 668 00:24:11,167 --> 00:24:12,602 Yeah, just probably... Yeah, yeah. 669 00:24:12,669 --> 00:24:13,703 I think that's all. That's why you're MC, yeah. 670 00:24:13,770 --> 00:24:14,836 So not good to go, then. 671 00:24:14,904 --> 00:24:16,406 [buzzer blares] 672 00:24:21,611 --> 00:24:24,013 [Joe] Here goes Q. He looks good. He's all cleaned up. 673 00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:25,415 - Q always looks good. - Take a picture? 674 00:24:25,481 --> 00:24:28,851 - Yeah, no problem. - Here you go, Q, you're in. 675 00:24:28,918 --> 00:24:30,453 Got it. There you go. Thank you. 676 00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:33,423 Thanks, I'm, uh, doing a eulogy, actually. 677 00:24:33,489 --> 00:24:35,824 We're supposed to dump the ashes in here, 678 00:24:35,892 --> 00:24:37,293 but it turns out you're not allowed to. 679 00:24:37,360 --> 00:24:38,795 Do you mind if I run the speech by you? 680 00:24:38,861 --> 00:24:40,797 'Cause I'm super nervous. It's super short. 681 00:24:40,863 --> 00:24:42,965 "What to say about Cousin Frieda? 682 00:24:43,966 --> 00:24:45,368 Sure, she had loose morals 683 00:24:45,435 --> 00:24:48,004 and a libido that wouldn't quit, and that's..." 684 00:24:48,805 --> 00:24:49,872 - How old are you? - 13. 685 00:24:49,939 --> 00:24:52,075 13? All right, cool. 686 00:24:52,141 --> 00:24:54,711 - I'm good. - [laughter] 687 00:24:54,777 --> 00:24:57,046 That's it. You're out. 688 00:24:57,113 --> 00:25:00,249 It's all about how she died 'cause of STDs. 689 00:25:00,316 --> 00:25:01,551 [laughter] 690 00:25:01,617 --> 00:25:02,552 [buzzer blares] 691 00:25:03,986 --> 00:25:07,056 [upbeat rock music] 692 00:25:11,761 --> 00:25:13,296 - Gettin' up. - Ready to go. 693 00:25:24,574 --> 00:25:26,909 - Can you guys humor me? - Always. 694 00:25:28,144 --> 00:25:29,712 Can we find a cave? 695 00:25:29,779 --> 00:25:31,948 [laughter] 696 00:25:32,014 --> 00:25:33,216 Don't ask. 697 00:25:33,282 --> 00:25:35,551 - Wait, it depends, for who. - You. 698 00:25:35,618 --> 00:25:38,154 [laughter] 699 00:25:38,221 --> 00:25:42,225 This, I mean, this idea basically was a layup for us. 700 00:25:42,291 --> 00:25:44,026 Just how do we make Joe's stupid face 701 00:25:44,093 --> 00:25:45,294 look even more stupid? 702 00:25:45,361 --> 00:25:48,831 The conceit here is Joe lost his tour 703 00:25:48,898 --> 00:25:50,800 about three decades ago. [laughter] 704 00:25:50,868 --> 00:25:53,336 And he's been living under the earth ever since. 705 00:25:53,403 --> 00:25:56,239 Middle of the summer, when it's 110 degrees outside, 706 00:25:56,305 --> 00:25:58,107 this is the place to be, I'll tell you that. 707 00:25:58,174 --> 00:25:59,976 When you guys see Joe for the first time, 708 00:26:00,042 --> 00:26:01,544 that's the first time we're seeing Joe. 709 00:26:01,611 --> 00:26:02,779 I can't wait for this. 710 00:26:02,845 --> 00:26:03,881 So as we're coming through here, 711 00:26:03,946 --> 00:26:05,281 kind of look along the ceiling. 712 00:26:05,348 --> 00:26:07,049 We got lots of these little divots. 713 00:26:07,116 --> 00:26:09,018 Here we go. 714 00:26:09,085 --> 00:26:10,586 You'll notice these cracks. 715 00:26:10,653 --> 00:26:13,456 That's the water movement when all this was underwater. 716 00:26:13,523 --> 00:26:14,657 Hello? [echoing] 717 00:26:14,724 --> 00:26:16,225 - Oh. - Oh. 718 00:26:16,292 --> 00:26:19,195 - Yo. - Oh, hey, man. 719 00:26:19,262 --> 00:26:20,596 - Oh. - [laughter] 720 00:26:20,663 --> 00:26:24,033 - Are you all right? - Yeah. What's up? 721 00:26:24,100 --> 00:26:25,903 [laughter] 722 00:26:25,968 --> 00:26:28,337 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 723 00:26:28,404 --> 00:26:29,739 [laughter] 724 00:26:29,806 --> 00:26:32,742 [Sal] Look at their faces. They're shocked. 725 00:26:32,809 --> 00:26:35,011 Oh, my God. For real, though? 726 00:26:35,077 --> 00:26:36,779 That's freakin' me out. 727 00:26:36,846 --> 00:26:37,980 It's freakin' you out? 728 00:26:38,047 --> 00:26:39,215 Imagine what this is like for me. 729 00:26:39,282 --> 00:26:40,483 You all right, dude? 730 00:26:40,550 --> 00:26:41,717 No, I've been to too many movies. 731 00:26:41,784 --> 00:26:42,853 Oh, he's gross. 732 00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:44,888 I got lost a little while ago. 733 00:26:44,954 --> 00:26:46,155 Hey. 734 00:26:46,222 --> 00:26:47,457 I didn't think he was... I didn't think 735 00:26:47,523 --> 00:26:49,058 he was gonna come out of this cave. 736 00:26:49,125 --> 00:26:51,694 - I was waiting for my parents. - [laughter] 737 00:26:51,761 --> 00:26:53,396 I've been down here since 1987. 738 00:26:53,463 --> 00:26:55,131 [laughter] 739 00:26:55,198 --> 00:26:56,632 Dad said, "Don't have a cow, man. 740 00:26:56,699 --> 00:26:57,733 Talk to the hand." 741 00:26:57,800 --> 00:27:00,069 And I was here... 742 00:27:00,136 --> 00:27:01,637 I got all turned around. 743 00:27:01,704 --> 00:27:04,106 What happened was I was looking for the gift shop... 744 00:27:05,074 --> 00:27:06,442 It's on down the left. 745 00:27:06,509 --> 00:27:07,977 [laughter] 746 00:27:08,044 --> 00:27:10,012 I went on my ass to the left here... 747 00:27:10,079 --> 00:27:11,380 I like your shirt. 748 00:27:11,447 --> 00:27:13,483 - I'm the beef. - [laughs] 749 00:27:13,549 --> 00:27:15,751 Joe, be proud of your "I'm the Beef" shirt. 750 00:27:15,818 --> 00:27:17,855 - Back of... - I'm the beef. 751 00:27:17,921 --> 00:27:20,256 [Sal laughs] I'm the beef. 752 00:27:20,323 --> 00:27:21,491 I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. 753 00:27:21,557 --> 00:27:23,159 - I'll just fold in. - Oh, okay. 754 00:27:23,226 --> 00:27:25,228 Well, the water... 755 00:27:25,294 --> 00:27:26,796 Again, the water that moves through it, 756 00:27:26,864 --> 00:27:28,531 that just opens up the cave. 757 00:27:28,598 --> 00:27:30,800 So this water, usually, with the rain, 758 00:27:30,868 --> 00:27:32,034 will come up over that way. 759 00:27:32,101 --> 00:27:33,269 Y'all have any questions? 760 00:27:33,336 --> 00:27:34,303 I have... I have a lot of questions. 761 00:27:34,370 --> 00:27:36,506 Uh, yeah. Go ahead. 762 00:27:36,572 --> 00:27:38,808 Let's start with what year is it? 763 00:27:38,876 --> 00:27:41,344 - It's 2018, sir. - Okay. 764 00:27:41,410 --> 00:27:44,514 Let me check my pager. [laughter] 765 00:27:44,580 --> 00:27:46,984 Joe, have them fall in line and walk in front of them 766 00:27:47,049 --> 00:27:48,484 - like you're a sergeant. - Why don't you... 767 00:27:48,551 --> 00:27:50,286 Why don't you let me just tell everybody? 768 00:27:50,353 --> 00:27:51,454 - You're pissed at everybody. - This water comes every... 769 00:27:51,521 --> 00:27:52,788 - Come on, Neil. - [laughing] 770 00:27:54,090 --> 00:27:55,424 This is what happened. 771 00:27:55,491 --> 00:27:57,093 You go up this ravine and it's a dead end. 772 00:27:57,159 --> 00:28:00,796 - Goes up, like, 200 feet. - 350 feet, Neil. 773 00:28:00,864 --> 00:28:03,332 Goes to 350 feet, okay? 774 00:28:03,399 --> 00:28:04,600 I mean, if you're gonna talk out your ass, 775 00:28:04,667 --> 00:28:06,102 turn around so I can understand you. 776 00:28:06,168 --> 00:28:09,472 [laughter] 777 00:28:09,539 --> 00:28:11,407 [Q] Anybody know who shot J.R.? 778 00:28:11,474 --> 00:28:13,109 Do you guys know who shot J.R.? 779 00:28:13,175 --> 00:28:15,344 [laughter] 780 00:28:15,411 --> 00:28:17,747 'Cause I missed... J.R. from Dallas. 781 00:28:17,813 --> 00:28:18,982 I missed that. 782 00:28:19,048 --> 00:28:20,750 It's been on my mind for so long. 783 00:28:20,816 --> 00:28:23,819 - Dad? - Dad? What? 784 00:28:23,887 --> 00:28:25,821 I didn't say shit. 785 00:28:25,889 --> 00:28:28,057 [laughter] 786 00:28:28,124 --> 00:28:30,027 You guys, follow me out of here. 787 00:28:30,092 --> 00:28:31,227 I'm dying to get outside. 788 00:28:31,294 --> 00:28:32,528 Did Mondale get a second term? 789 00:28:32,595 --> 00:28:34,430 Did Mondale get a second term? 790 00:28:34,497 --> 00:28:37,233 [laughter] 791 00:28:37,300 --> 00:28:40,403 Uh, okay, we're still rolling here, guys. 792 00:28:40,469 --> 00:28:41,771 - [Joe screaming] - [all screaming] 793 00:28:41,837 --> 00:28:44,707 You fucking son of a bitch. Oh, my God. 794 00:28:44,774 --> 00:28:47,143 Oh, my God. It scared the shit out of me. 795 00:28:47,209 --> 00:28:48,711 - Oh, my God. - Oh, my God! 796 00:28:51,949 --> 00:28:55,084 [muffled music playing] 797 00:28:57,453 --> 00:28:59,121 Turn up the tension. Pedal, pedal. 798 00:28:59,188 --> 00:29:00,489 - Hey, bud, what's up? - Hey. 799 00:29:00,556 --> 00:29:04,226 You, uh, have a laptop charger or... 800 00:29:04,293 --> 00:29:05,661 Which one? USB-C or the older ones? 801 00:29:05,728 --> 00:29:08,564 Let's go, ladies! Keep it going! 802 00:29:08,631 --> 00:29:11,133 Work the quads, work the glutes. 803 00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:12,468 Anyways, what can I do for you, bud? 804 00:29:12,535 --> 00:29:14,337 - "Let's go, ladies"? - Let's go, yeah. 805 00:29:14,403 --> 00:29:15,906 Who are these ladies? 806 00:29:15,973 --> 00:29:18,240 Do me a favor, keep 'em encouraged while I'm gone. 807 00:29:20,676 --> 00:29:22,712 Let's go! 808 00:29:22,778 --> 00:29:25,048 You are doggin' it! I want to see more out of you! 809 00:29:25,114 --> 00:29:26,382 You over there, you're looking good. 810 00:29:26,449 --> 00:29:28,085 - Let's go! - Sorry, that's too much. 811 00:29:28,150 --> 00:29:29,518 - That's too much. - Yeah, I'm so sorry. 812 00:29:29,585 --> 00:29:30,854 I don't have the USB-C, I have the older laptop, 813 00:29:30,921 --> 00:29:32,022 so I don't got it, bud. 814 00:29:32,089 --> 00:29:33,489 Good? 815 00:29:33,556 --> 00:29:34,958 - Did you... - I haven't got it, okay? 816 00:29:35,025 --> 00:29:38,160 Come on, ladies! Let's go, let's go, let's go! 817 00:29:38,227 --> 00:29:41,731 [rock music] 818 00:29:53,242 --> 00:29:55,344 [Sal] Q is on a boat with a couple of strangers, 819 00:29:55,411 --> 00:29:57,413 and we've arranged for this boat to pull up 820 00:29:57,480 --> 00:29:58,882 on someone in distress. 821 00:29:58,949 --> 00:30:01,684 Q doesn't know who, how, or what the situation is. 822 00:30:01,751 --> 00:30:03,753 In that moment, the captain's gonna say, 823 00:30:03,819 --> 00:30:05,956 because of the law, he cannot accept 824 00:30:06,023 --> 00:30:07,256 anyone else on the boat 825 00:30:07,323 --> 00:30:08,892 unless it's unanimously agreed upon. 826 00:30:08,959 --> 00:30:10,726 The catch is that we're gonna give him the reason 827 00:30:10,793 --> 00:30:12,328 why this guy can't get on the boat. 828 00:30:13,362 --> 00:30:14,664 You see that? 829 00:30:14,730 --> 00:30:17,366 Guy over there flagging us down. 830 00:30:17,433 --> 00:30:19,435 - A guy? - [Joe] Uh-oh, Q. Uh-oh, Q. 831 00:30:19,502 --> 00:30:20,670 Somebody's in the water. 832 00:30:23,639 --> 00:30:25,042 - [Joe] You see who that is, Q? - [laughter] 833 00:30:25,108 --> 00:30:28,611 [Murr] Is that a U.S. soldier? 834 00:30:28,678 --> 00:30:30,680 - A hero? - [Joe] An American hero. 835 00:30:30,746 --> 00:30:33,150 - It's G.I. Float. - [laughter] 836 00:30:33,215 --> 00:30:35,718 I'm a U.S. soldier in distress. 837 00:30:35,785 --> 00:30:36,887 Can you please help? 838 00:30:36,953 --> 00:30:38,088 We have to make sure that everyone's okay 839 00:30:38,155 --> 00:30:39,321 with bringing him on. 840 00:30:39,388 --> 00:30:40,322 Are you guys all right with that? 841 00:30:40,389 --> 00:30:41,724 Yeah, that's all right. 842 00:30:41,791 --> 00:30:43,325 You're okay with bringing him on? 843 00:30:43,392 --> 00:30:46,963 If he's in distress, then we want to help. 844 00:30:47,030 --> 00:30:48,364 You okay to bring him on? 845 00:30:48,431 --> 00:30:49,799 Well, hear me out. 846 00:30:49,866 --> 00:30:51,434 I mean, we help a solider in a dinghy, 847 00:30:51,500 --> 00:30:53,335 what's that gonna do for his confidence? 848 00:30:53,402 --> 00:30:55,571 If we... [laughs] 849 00:30:55,638 --> 00:30:57,606 If we were to help a soldier in a dinghy, 850 00:30:57,673 --> 00:30:59,575 what's that do for his confidence? 851 00:30:59,642 --> 00:31:01,510 [laughter] 852 00:31:01,577 --> 00:31:04,147 We have backed him into a corner like no other. 853 00:31:04,213 --> 00:31:06,315 - Where's he from? - Where did you serve? 854 00:31:06,382 --> 00:31:09,052 - Iraq. - Oh, so he survived Iraq. 855 00:31:09,119 --> 00:31:10,486 He's okay. 856 00:31:10,553 --> 00:31:13,090 - I thank you for your service. - [laughter] 857 00:31:13,156 --> 00:31:15,825 I'm just saying, we don't really know anything about the guy. 858 00:31:15,892 --> 00:31:17,928 They sell that outfit at any Army-Navy store. 859 00:31:17,994 --> 00:31:20,463 - [laughter] - You know? 860 00:31:20,529 --> 00:31:21,898 How is this even an issue? 861 00:31:21,965 --> 00:31:26,302 [laughter] 862 00:31:26,368 --> 00:31:27,703 I know this looks like I don't want 863 00:31:27,770 --> 00:31:29,206 to save a U.S. soldier in distress... 864 00:31:29,305 --> 00:31:31,007 - No, it doesn't. - It doesn't? Great. 865 00:31:31,074 --> 00:31:32,175 [laughter] 866 00:31:32,241 --> 00:31:33,977 - Oh! Oh, my God! - Wow. 867 00:31:34,044 --> 00:31:36,512 How is he convincing people not to help a soldier? 868 00:31:36,579 --> 00:31:38,915 I know, right, a unanimous vote from you guys, seriously. 869 00:31:38,982 --> 00:31:40,150 Yeah, we're good. 870 00:31:40,217 --> 00:31:41,417 We talked it out, 871 00:31:41,484 --> 00:31:43,519 and we're okay just bailing on him. 872 00:31:43,586 --> 00:31:45,088 I feel bad leaving him out there. 873 00:31:45,155 --> 00:31:46,555 - Yes! - Oh. 874 00:31:46,622 --> 00:31:48,959 I need an answer from each of you, then, so... 875 00:31:49,025 --> 00:31:51,128 I'll go with whatever the group decides. 876 00:31:51,194 --> 00:31:52,328 Let him on the boat. 877 00:31:52,394 --> 00:31:53,562 - Yeah? - [all] Oh! 878 00:31:53,629 --> 00:31:56,432 - Let him on? - Yeah! 879 00:31:56,499 --> 00:31:57,833 Where were you going to? 880 00:31:57,901 --> 00:32:00,269 Uh, actually, I was trying to get to Miami 881 00:32:00,336 --> 00:32:02,072 to see the Paula Abdul concert. 882 00:32:02,139 --> 00:32:03,606 [laughter] 883 00:32:03,672 --> 00:32:06,009 - Aren't we all. - [laughter] 884 00:32:06,076 --> 00:32:07,443 [buzzer blares] 885 00:32:11,915 --> 00:32:13,582 [Q] This looks like a real party crowd 886 00:32:13,649 --> 00:32:15,919 you have out there, pal. [laughs] 887 00:32:15,986 --> 00:32:17,820 We're about to roll up on somebody. 888 00:32:17,888 --> 00:32:20,456 Here we go, they're already worried. 889 00:32:20,523 --> 00:32:22,259 It's a man in a boat? 890 00:32:22,324 --> 00:32:24,060 [Q] Joe, why don't you go take a look at who's in distress? 891 00:32:24,127 --> 00:32:26,328 Just watch Joe's face. 892 00:32:28,430 --> 00:32:29,698 I'm stuck. 893 00:32:29,765 --> 00:32:31,500 Can you swing around, give me a hand? 894 00:32:31,567 --> 00:32:32,701 - Oh, man. - [laughter] 895 00:32:34,938 --> 00:32:37,339 Oh, I'm stuck! 896 00:32:37,406 --> 00:32:40,110 I'm having trouble getting back on the boat. 897 00:32:40,177 --> 00:32:42,946 What does he think? 898 00:32:43,013 --> 00:32:45,548 Basically, maritime law says that if we bring him on, 899 00:32:45,614 --> 00:32:47,550 everyone has to be okay with us bringing him on. 900 00:32:47,616 --> 00:32:49,986 - Does it have to be unanimous? - It has to be unanimous. 901 00:32:50,053 --> 00:32:51,420 - Is it all right with you? - Oh, no it... 902 00:32:51,487 --> 00:32:52,521 - Is it okay with you, sir? - Yeah. 903 00:32:53,190 --> 00:32:54,824 Oh, no. 904 00:32:56,193 --> 00:32:57,359 I mean, hear me out. 905 00:32:57,426 --> 00:32:58,727 I promised I'd never put myself 906 00:32:58,794 --> 00:33:00,329 into this situation again. 907 00:33:00,396 --> 00:33:01,630 I promised I'd never put myself 908 00:33:01,697 --> 00:33:02,966 in this situation again. 909 00:33:03,033 --> 00:33:04,234 I've been burned once. 910 00:33:04,301 --> 00:33:05,135 I'm not gonna let it happen twice. 911 00:33:05,202 --> 00:33:06,903 [laughter] 912 00:33:06,970 --> 00:33:08,537 - You're saying no? - I'm saying no, yeah. 913 00:33:08,604 --> 00:33:10,639 Murr, I'm having issues with my dinghy. 914 00:33:10,706 --> 00:33:13,475 Guys, I'm having issues with my dinghy. 915 00:33:13,542 --> 00:33:15,411 I don't know which dinghy he's talking about. 916 00:33:15,477 --> 00:33:17,479 [laughs] I don't know. 917 00:33:19,115 --> 00:33:21,885 I mean, you gotta see it from our point of view, pal. 918 00:33:21,952 --> 00:33:23,752 Joe, go on a rant. Take this thing over. 919 00:33:23,819 --> 00:33:25,521 You got your buttocks out in the middle of the ocean, 920 00:33:25,588 --> 00:33:27,389 bobbing up and down with a lady on the boat, 921 00:33:27,456 --> 00:33:28,859 I mean, you want us to take you on... 922 00:33:28,925 --> 00:33:30,526 - I mean, where are your trunks? - [Murr] What? 923 00:33:30,593 --> 00:33:32,863 The logic doesn't track. Where are your trunks? 924 00:33:32,929 --> 00:33:34,763 [laughter] 925 00:33:34,830 --> 00:33:36,867 Can't we just help him get on his boat? 926 00:33:36,933 --> 00:33:38,467 [Sal] Joey, it's you versus Murr. 927 00:33:38,534 --> 00:33:41,004 - He gets on, you lose. - Dead, pal. 928 00:33:41,071 --> 00:33:44,406 Yeah, the rule is we both get on this boat, I lose. 929 00:33:45,242 --> 00:33:47,843 - Pretty much. - What? 930 00:33:47,911 --> 00:33:49,279 Wait, wait, whoa, whoa. Hold on! 931 00:33:49,346 --> 00:33:50,679 What are you doing? 932 00:33:51,513 --> 00:33:53,149 Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joey. 933 00:33:53,216 --> 00:33:54,783 What are you... What? 934 00:33:54,851 --> 00:33:57,386 - I'm out. Ah! - [laughter] 935 00:34:00,991 --> 00:34:02,325 Is this for real? 936 00:34:02,391 --> 00:34:04,627 [Sal] He's gonna save him. He's going to save him. 937 00:34:04,693 --> 00:34:07,696 - Come on! - So Murray still loses. 938 00:34:07,763 --> 00:34:09,199 - That's it, he's off. - Oh, my God, Murray... 939 00:34:09,266 --> 00:34:10,399 [Sal] Well, he's not getting on the boat. 940 00:34:10,466 --> 00:34:11,500 - Get in... - Just not... 941 00:34:11,567 --> 00:34:13,769 - Oh! - Oh! 942 00:34:13,836 --> 00:34:15,604 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 943 00:34:15,671 --> 00:34:18,008 How could you dare touch that ass? 944 00:34:18,074 --> 00:34:20,877 - I'll see you back at land. - Are you kidding me? Joe! 945 00:34:20,944 --> 00:34:22,444 Do you have beer on this boat? 946 00:34:22,511 --> 00:34:24,014 [laughter] 947 00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:25,282 Son of a... 948 00:34:25,348 --> 00:34:26,749 [buzzer blares] 949 00:34:46,669 --> 00:34:49,906 - Wow. This is special. - Ooh. 950 00:34:49,973 --> 00:34:51,473 You couldn't have booked something a little bit better? 951 00:34:51,540 --> 00:34:53,109 It's 2 1/2 stars. How many stars do you need? 952 00:34:53,176 --> 00:34:54,743 - All of them. - One of the reviews, 953 00:34:54,810 --> 00:34:57,780 Danny D. says, "Found two crack pipes, lolz." 954 00:34:57,846 --> 00:35:00,317 With a Z. Still gave it four stars. 955 00:35:00,383 --> 00:35:01,483 - All right. - With a Z? 956 00:35:01,550 --> 00:35:02,953 - It's got cable. - That's hip. 957 00:35:05,021 --> 00:35:06,122 [grunts] 958 00:35:13,029 --> 00:35:14,463 You guys did not think we weren't gonna 959 00:35:14,530 --> 00:35:16,032 mess with Sal on this trip, did you? 960 00:35:16,099 --> 00:35:18,001 Yeah, that's right, we stopped at this roadside motel 961 00:35:18,068 --> 00:35:19,501 because they allow pets. 962 00:35:19,568 --> 00:35:21,004 You're about to see a grown man cry. 963 00:35:21,071 --> 00:35:23,039 [all laugh] 964 00:35:23,106 --> 00:35:24,773 I was saying, like, pull up to him, so it could be fun. 965 00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:26,508 Just... You're just going to see what he's doing. 966 00:35:26,575 --> 00:35:28,677 - Right. Hoodie's on? - Get in. 967 00:35:31,847 --> 00:35:32,949 What? 968 00:35:36,485 --> 00:35:38,254 All right. Can I... 969 00:35:38,321 --> 00:35:39,722 Just open the door, buddy. 970 00:35:39,788 --> 00:35:41,858 - There's no handle. - No handle? 971 00:35:41,925 --> 00:35:43,559 This isn't the nicest motel. 972 00:35:43,625 --> 00:35:45,128 This wasn't right for today. 973 00:35:45,195 --> 00:35:47,230 Sal, everybody knows you're afraid of cats. 974 00:35:48,198 --> 00:35:49,765 [animal growling] 975 00:35:52,335 --> 00:35:55,504 [growling] 976 00:35:55,571 --> 00:35:58,341 Oh, my... 977 00:35:58,408 --> 00:36:00,276 - That's a tiger. - [laughs] 978 00:36:00,343 --> 00:36:02,678 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 979 00:36:02,745 --> 00:36:05,848 I can't do this. Oh, my God. 980 00:36:05,915 --> 00:36:08,985 How did you get the insurance to sign off on this? 981 00:36:09,052 --> 00:36:10,387 We didn't. 982 00:36:10,453 --> 00:36:12,788 Guys, I don't think it's funny. I don't want to do it. 983 00:36:12,856 --> 00:36:15,824 Guys, please. Guys, please. Guys, please. 984 00:36:15,892 --> 00:36:17,293 I don't think it's funny, guys. 985 00:36:17,360 --> 00:36:18,995 [laughter] 986 00:36:19,062 --> 00:36:20,263 Oh. Can't move. 987 00:36:20,330 --> 00:36:22,598 Yeah, that's probably wise that you don't move. 988 00:36:22,664 --> 00:36:25,035 I've seen so many movies and so many TV shows... 989 00:36:25,101 --> 00:36:27,569 In one second, if this tiger wants to kill me, 990 00:36:27,636 --> 00:36:29,571 the tiger's gonna kill me. 991 00:36:29,638 --> 00:36:31,241 - [exhales] - [tiger growling] 992 00:36:31,307 --> 00:36:33,675 Guys, did you think this through all the way? 993 00:36:33,742 --> 00:36:35,111 - Not really - Not really, no. 994 00:36:35,178 --> 00:36:37,013 How can you do this to me? What do I do? 995 00:36:37,080 --> 00:36:38,515 Try to get out of the room, bud. 996 00:36:38,580 --> 00:36:40,150 There's a door right in front of you. 997 00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:45,055 - Uh-oh. - [Q] Uh-oh. 998 00:36:45,121 --> 00:36:46,856 Now he's more concerned about the lock than the tiger. 999 00:36:46,923 --> 00:36:49,959 - [tiger growling] - No, no, no, no, no. 1000 00:36:50,026 --> 00:36:51,294 [Joe] Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 1001 00:36:51,361 --> 00:36:52,395 [Q] Oh, my God! 1002 00:36:52,462 --> 00:36:56,366 Guys, I can't make it. 1003 00:36:56,433 --> 00:36:58,034 Good, he's brushing his teeth. Go, go. 1004 00:36:58,101 --> 00:36:59,802 - He's brushing his teeth. - There he goes. 1005 00:36:59,869 --> 00:37:00,836 - He's up on the sink. - [Murr] Get out of there. 1006 00:37:00,904 --> 00:37:03,239 Get out of there, quick. 1007 00:37:03,306 --> 00:37:05,275 Look at the poster in front of your face. 1008 00:37:05,341 --> 00:37:08,211 - You think that's funny? - It's the shit. 1009 00:37:08,278 --> 00:37:10,046 Just hang in there, pal. 1010 00:37:10,113 --> 00:37:11,814 Guys, I... 1011 00:37:12,714 --> 00:37:15,251 don't think this is funny. 1012 00:37:15,318 --> 00:37:17,619 - Who's there? - Just let me in, guys. 1013 00:37:17,686 --> 00:37:18,955 - It's not funny. - Sal, it's super easy. 1014 00:37:19,022 --> 00:37:20,090 You just have to say this sentence. 1015 00:37:20,156 --> 00:37:21,491 - Go ahead. - "Let me in. 1016 00:37:21,558 --> 00:37:23,725 - I'm a baby bitch boy." - [laughs] 1017 00:37:23,792 --> 00:37:25,328 Let me in, I'm the baby bitch boy. 1018 00:37:25,395 --> 00:37:26,762 [laughter] 1019 00:37:26,829 --> 00:37:28,364 No, no, that's what Joe wanted you to say. 1020 00:37:28,431 --> 00:37:29,832 I want you to say, 1021 00:37:29,899 --> 00:37:33,236 "Murr's funnier, smarter, and better than me." 1022 00:37:33,303 --> 00:37:35,038 [kissing] Come here, buddy. Come here, buddy. 1023 00:37:35,105 --> 00:37:36,940 [laughter] 1024 00:37:40,243 --> 00:37:42,778 [tiger growls] 1025 00:37:44,948 --> 00:37:48,084 [muffled music playing] 1026 00:37:51,121 --> 00:37:53,356 Chaplin moustache will never come back. 1027 00:37:53,423 --> 00:37:54,457 - Oh, hey, bud. - Hey. 1028 00:37:54,524 --> 00:37:55,358 Do you know the Wi-Fi password? 1029 00:37:55,425 --> 00:37:56,692 Oh, the Wi-Fi? 1030 00:37:56,758 --> 00:37:57,961 Sure, you don't have it in your room? 1031 00:37:58,027 --> 00:37:59,896 No, the card's not in there, so, yeah. 1032 00:37:59,963 --> 00:38:02,698 [indistinct chatter] 1033 00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:05,268 [mouths word] 1034 00:38:05,335 --> 00:38:07,003 I mean, just search for Morgan Suites. 1035 00:38:07,070 --> 00:38:08,571 The password is "password." 1036 00:38:08,637 --> 00:38:10,306 The password is "password"? That's not very secure. 1037 00:38:10,373 --> 00:38:12,041 - No. - Yeah. Oh, hey. 1038 00:38:12,108 --> 00:38:14,710 Oh, hey! It's the Houlihans. 1039 00:38:14,776 --> 00:38:16,845 One sec. Hey, Marisa, Chris. Come on. 1040 00:38:16,913 --> 00:38:17,947 - Please, please. - Murr! 1041 00:38:18,014 --> 00:38:19,681 Hey, Marisa, you look gorgeous. 1042 00:38:19,748 --> 00:38:20,716 - Yeah. - And Chris. 1043 00:38:20,782 --> 00:38:21,851 Scotch is in the back. 1044 00:38:21,918 --> 00:38:23,253 - Take it easy this time. - Always. 1045 00:38:23,319 --> 00:38:24,387 - All right, buddy. Good night. - All right, man. 1046 00:38:24,454 --> 00:38:25,388 You have a good night. 1047 00:38:35,532 --> 00:38:36,966 Grover Cleveland was a Capricorn... Yeah, man? 1048 00:38:37,033 --> 00:38:38,268 Are there any caps on the password? 1049 00:38:38,334 --> 00:38:39,302 All caps. 1050 00:38:39,369 --> 00:38:40,802 All caps password. Yeah, thanks. 1051 00:38:40,870 --> 00:38:44,107 [playful music] 1052 00:39:01,524 --> 00:39:04,760 Uh-huh. I guess I'm late. 1053 00:39:04,826 --> 00:39:07,163 What do you want to do? 1054 00:39:07,230 --> 00:39:08,830 All right, this looks nice and cool in the sun. 1055 00:39:08,898 --> 00:39:09,866 This is gonna be great. 1056 00:39:09,933 --> 00:39:13,403 [epic music] 1057 00:39:13,469 --> 00:39:15,405 All right. 1058 00:39:15,471 --> 00:39:16,873 Here we go. 1059 00:39:16,940 --> 00:39:18,608 Oh, God, I'm gonna die. 1060 00:39:18,675 --> 00:39:20,009 [grunting] 1061 00:39:20,076 --> 00:39:22,245 Nobody told me your name, buddy. 1062 00:39:22,312 --> 00:39:24,547 So how about we go with Benjamin Horse? 1063 00:39:24,614 --> 00:39:26,316 Yes. All right. 1064 00:39:30,620 --> 00:39:32,322 - [horn blares] - Oh. 1065 00:39:32,388 --> 00:39:33,789 Oh, my goodness. 1066 00:39:35,325 --> 00:39:39,162 This says we go up one mile and make a left, 1067 00:39:39,229 --> 00:39:42,932 and then we can punch the guys. 1068 00:39:42,999 --> 00:39:44,867 I'd like to marry a girl like you one day. 1069 00:39:44,934 --> 00:39:47,736 Pretty. Beautiful blue eyes. 1070 00:39:47,803 --> 00:39:50,006 Calm, steady demeanor. 1071 00:39:50,073 --> 00:39:53,742 You guys messed up, because I'm havin' a blast! 1072 00:39:53,809 --> 00:39:56,212 This is the best road trip ever! 1073 00:40:02,952 --> 00:40:04,320 Let me ask you this, 1074 00:40:04,387 --> 00:40:06,556 When was the last time you had an E.L. Fudge? 1075 00:40:06,623 --> 00:40:08,258 - One week ago. - Really? 1076 00:40:08,324 --> 00:40:09,626 - No exaggeration. - You're lying. 1077 00:40:09,692 --> 00:40:11,394 I swear to God. 1078 00:40:11,461 --> 00:40:13,563 Fudge Stripe gets all the shine over at Keebler. 1079 00:40:13,630 --> 00:40:14,998 Fudge Stripe's a better cookie. 1080 00:40:15,064 --> 00:40:16,832 I'm talking Keebler, I'm talking E.L. Fudge. 1081 00:40:16,899 --> 00:40:18,668 I'm talking Fudge Stripe, and then I move on. 1082 00:40:18,735 --> 00:40:20,103 I'll give you $1,000/ 1083 00:40:20,169 --> 00:40:21,871 if any of you can tell me what E.L. stands for. 1084 00:40:23,306 --> 00:40:24,840 I'm blowing your mind right now. 1085 00:40:24,907 --> 00:40:28,278 - Everybody loves? - [laughs] 1086 00:40:28,344 --> 00:40:31,748 - Shit. - You carry $1,000 with you? 1087 00:40:31,813 --> 00:40:34,384 - I think I see someone. - Yeah! 1088 00:40:34,450 --> 00:40:35,518 Oh, there he is. 1089 00:40:36,486 --> 00:40:38,655 Welcome to the party, pal. 1090 00:40:38,721 --> 00:40:40,056 [Joe] Come on, Fatiator. 1091 00:40:40,123 --> 00:40:42,325 Once my balls shot directly up in my body 1092 00:40:42,392 --> 00:40:45,827 about a mile back, I started enjoying it. 1093 00:40:45,895 --> 00:40:47,263 - You got it. Be careful, man. - Whoa! 1094 00:40:47,330 --> 00:40:50,733 - Park it over there. - Okay, okay. All right. 1095 00:40:50,799 --> 00:40:51,868 You good? 1096 00:40:53,703 --> 00:40:55,104 [laughs] 1097 00:40:55,772 --> 00:40:57,006 [engine turns over] 1098 00:40:57,073 --> 00:40:58,541 [Q] You're forever my horse, baby. 1099 00:41:00,009 --> 00:41:02,145 [horse neighs] 1100 00:41:09,686 --> 00:41:11,721 Murr, how... This idiot. 1101 00:41:11,788 --> 00:41:13,256 - What? - Look at... 1102 00:41:15,224 --> 00:41:17,260 How does he even sleep like that? 1103 00:41:17,327 --> 00:41:18,861 Oh, man. He's got no idea what's coming. 1104 00:41:18,928 --> 00:41:21,097 Oh, I know. I've already made some calls. 1105 00:41:23,800 --> 00:41:25,768 ♪ Get ready, get ready, go ♪ 1106 00:41:25,834 --> 00:41:27,970 ♪ Forever my girl Forever my chick ♪ 1107 00:41:28,037 --> 00:41:29,205 ♪ Together forever, we lit ♪ 1108 00:41:29,272 --> 00:41:30,640 ♪ Whatever the gift, she cool ♪ 1109 00:41:30,707 --> 00:41:31,774 ♪ Whatever she get ♪ 1110 00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:32,809 ♪ Strawberry letters for dick ♪ 1111 00:41:32,875 --> 00:41:33,943 ♪ I'm bound to sweat ♪ 1112 00:41:34,010 --> 00:41:35,445 ♪ Got 'em whenever she's sick ♪ 1113 00:41:35,511 --> 00:41:37,513 ♪ She call me This medicine quick ♪ 1114 00:41:37,580 --> 00:41:38,815 ♪ I measured the dick before I could measure the bitch ♪ 1115 00:41:38,881 --> 00:41:39,882 ♪ She on the measuring stick ♪ 1116 00:41:39,949 --> 00:41:41,417 ♪ I'm heavy legit ♪ 1117 00:41:41,484 --> 00:41:42,785 ♪ Like forever is wrong, Whatever I do ♪ 1118 00:41:42,852 --> 00:41:44,287 ♪ You, forever my boo ♪ 1119 00:41:44,354 --> 00:41:45,621 ♪ And back when They call me the cat ♪ 1120 00:41:45,688 --> 00:41:46,756 ♪ I'm like Pepé Le Pew ♪ 1121 00:41:46,823 --> 00:41:48,191 ♪ Ha ♪ 1122 00:41:48,257 --> 00:41:50,893 ♪ Staten Island in the building ♪ 1123 00:41:50,960 --> 00:41:52,295 ♪ Yeah ♪ 1124 00:41:52,362 --> 00:41:54,163 - [Murr] I'm shaking. - [club music blaring] 1125 00:41:54,230 --> 00:41:55,965 All right, how are you? 1126 00:41:56,032 --> 00:41:57,567 [hip-hop vocal music playing] 1127 00:41:59,702 --> 00:42:01,804 [indistinct chatter] 1128 00:42:01,871 --> 00:42:03,272 Well, ladies, this is the birthday boy. 1129 00:42:03,339 --> 00:42:04,407 We're here to celebrate him. 1130 00:42:04,474 --> 00:42:06,809 [cheering] 1131 00:42:06,876 --> 00:42:08,578 So let's do this. 1132 00:42:13,516 --> 00:42:14,817 I hold back. 1133 00:42:14,884 --> 00:42:17,086 - I get shy at first. - [laughs] 1134 00:42:18,955 --> 00:42:21,124 I guess it is a little. 1135 00:42:21,190 --> 00:42:22,458 It's his birthday, ladies. 1136 00:42:22,525 --> 00:42:24,193 What does this look like from your vantage? 1137 00:42:26,662 --> 00:42:27,997 [music stops] 1138 00:42:28,064 --> 00:42:32,802 [all] ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 1139 00:42:32,870 --> 00:42:37,306 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 1140 00:42:37,373 --> 00:42:42,378 ♪ Happy birthday, dear Murray ♪ 1141 00:42:42,445 --> 00:42:47,817 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 1142 00:42:47,885 --> 00:42:49,252 - Are you serious? - [cheering] 1143 00:42:49,318 --> 00:42:51,387 That's Murray's family behind us. 1144 00:42:51,454 --> 00:42:54,157 That's James' nieces and nephews. 1145 00:42:54,223 --> 00:42:56,292 - Happy birthday, my friend. - Oh, my God. 1146 00:42:56,359 --> 00:42:58,294 - [laughter] - They're all here! 1147 00:42:58,361 --> 00:43:01,063 [laughter] 1148 00:43:04,534 --> 00:43:08,906 Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? 1149 00:43:08,971 --> 00:43:11,941 [laughter] 1150 00:43:15,211 --> 00:43:16,679 [Sal] Everybody's ready to roll. 1151 00:43:18,815 --> 00:43:20,216 James, they're so innocent. 1152 00:43:20,283 --> 00:43:22,853 Are you kidding me? You flew my whole... 1153 00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:25,588 That's my nieces and nephews. 1154 00:43:25,655 --> 00:43:27,523 It's all fake? 1155 00:43:27,590 --> 00:43:28,926 [all] Happy birthday! 1156 00:43:28,991 --> 00:43:31,260 [cheering] 1157 00:43:31,327 --> 00:43:32,762 ♪ I'm the joker ♪ 1158 00:43:32,829 --> 00:43:34,964 ♪ I'm practically nuts ♪ 1159 00:43:35,031 --> 00:43:36,265 ♪ With my crew ♪ 1160 00:43:36,332 --> 00:43:39,268 Huh. The Atlanta Hawks are hiring. 1161 00:43:40,938 --> 00:43:42,138 Players? 1162 00:43:44,307 --> 00:43:45,909 I feel like they shouldn't put an ad out for that. 1163 00:43:45,975 --> 00:43:47,443 It's unclear. 1164 00:43:49,812 --> 00:43:51,180 [Sal] All righty. Here we go. 1165 00:43:53,115 --> 00:43:54,717 ♪ Whoa, joker ♪ 1166 00:43:57,955 --> 00:43:59,121 - Murr. - Yep. 1167 00:43:59,188 --> 00:44:00,356 - How you doing, buddy? - I'm good. 1168 00:44:01,357 --> 00:44:02,893 Here we go. Here we go, guys. 1169 00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:05,027 - [Murr] Here we go. We're in. - How are you doing? 1170 00:44:05,094 --> 00:44:06,362 - Hey, I'm James Murray. Nice to meet you. - Hey, nice to meet you. Joe. 1171 00:44:06,429 --> 00:44:07,830 - How are you? - Good, good. 1172 00:44:07,898 --> 00:44:09,165 - How are you doing? - Joe, pleasure. I'm great. 1173 00:44:09,232 --> 00:44:10,333 - Thank you so much. - Awesome. 1174 00:44:10,399 --> 00:44:11,501 - Well, welcome. - Thank you. 1175 00:44:11,567 --> 00:44:12,735 So where are you coming in from? 1176 00:44:12,802 --> 00:44:14,170 Oh, I live here in Atlanta. 1177 00:44:14,237 --> 00:44:15,838 You answer the questions we ask you. 1178 00:44:15,906 --> 00:44:17,440 So where are you from originally? 1179 00:44:17,507 --> 00:44:19,408 [Q] Where do I see myself in five years? 1180 00:44:19,475 --> 00:44:22,378 Well, in five years, I see myself well on track 1181 00:44:22,445 --> 00:44:24,480 to maybe a managerial... [laughter] 1182 00:44:24,547 --> 00:44:25,715 Okay, great. 1183 00:44:25,781 --> 00:44:27,817 So how'd you hear about this role in particular? 1184 00:44:27,885 --> 00:44:29,519 Oh. 1185 00:44:29,585 --> 00:44:30,753 [Q] Well, what do you feel your biggest strength is? 1186 00:44:30,820 --> 00:44:32,021 My biggest strengths are... 1187 00:44:32,088 --> 00:44:33,356 [laughter] 1188 00:44:33,422 --> 00:44:35,859 I would say confidence, approachability... 1189 00:44:35,926 --> 00:44:37,527 - Sure. - I'm easy to talk with. 1190 00:44:37,593 --> 00:44:39,362 Why leave your position at Georgia State? 1191 00:44:39,428 --> 00:44:40,931 I saw you were there until March. 1192 00:44:40,998 --> 00:44:42,966 - [Q] In full disclosure... - In full disclosure... 1193 00:44:43,032 --> 00:44:48,005 - I had a child out of wedlock. - I had a child out of wedlock. 1194 00:44:48,070 --> 00:44:50,306 If that disqualifies me from the job, I understand. 1195 00:44:50,373 --> 00:44:53,075 If that disqualifies me from the job, I understand. 1196 00:44:53,142 --> 00:44:55,811 - Nope. Nope. Certainly not. - Right. 1197 00:44:55,879 --> 00:44:57,346 [laughter] 1198 00:44:57,413 --> 00:44:59,515 I put a Polaroid camera. Just take a quick picture. 1199 00:45:00,216 --> 00:45:01,250 - Cool. - Right? 1200 00:45:01,317 --> 00:45:02,785 - You got a... - Yeah. 1201 00:45:02,853 --> 00:45:04,387 [laughter] 1202 00:45:04,453 --> 00:45:06,622 - Camera. Nice. - Yeah. 1203 00:45:06,689 --> 00:45:08,257 [Q] Get him to sign it. Get him to sign it. 1204 00:45:08,324 --> 00:45:10,459 - Well, um... - Can you autograph? 1205 00:45:10,526 --> 00:45:12,194 - Is that cool? - Sure, yeah. Yeah, bring it. 1206 00:45:12,261 --> 00:45:13,529 [Q] I mean, you are on the Hawks. 1207 00:45:13,596 --> 00:45:15,032 I mean, you are on the Hawks, so... 1208 00:45:15,097 --> 00:45:16,666 - [laughter] - Yeah, well... Yeah. 1209 00:45:16,732 --> 00:45:18,568 I have to apologize if I seem a little off. 1210 00:45:18,634 --> 00:45:20,202 I have to apologize, by the way, 1211 00:45:20,269 --> 00:45:21,905 if I seem a little off during the interview. 1212 00:45:21,972 --> 00:45:23,105 Aunt Flo's in town. 1213 00:45:23,172 --> 00:45:25,408 - [laughter] - Aunt... [laughs] 1214 00:45:25,474 --> 00:45:27,310 Frick. 1215 00:45:27,376 --> 00:45:28,711 Looks like I'm not getting the job. 1216 00:45:28,778 --> 00:45:31,180 [laughter] 1217 00:45:31,247 --> 00:45:32,950 [Joe] Or the party ticket. [Q] Yeah. 1218 00:45:33,016 --> 00:45:34,150 [buzzer blares] 1219 00:45:36,218 --> 00:45:37,620 Look at this, boys. 1220 00:45:37,687 --> 00:45:38,989 This is big-time... You get this job, 1221 00:45:39,056 --> 00:45:40,389 you're gonna be big-time, buddy. 1222 00:45:40,456 --> 00:45:41,524 This is a big-time gig we're infiltrating. 1223 00:45:41,591 --> 00:45:43,659 I'm ready for the big time. 1224 00:45:43,726 --> 00:45:45,595 - [Joe] Here she comes. - Hello, hi. 1225 00:45:45,661 --> 00:45:47,430 - How are you? - How are you? I'm Brian. 1226 00:45:47,496 --> 00:45:50,199 - Hey. Nice to meet you. - Very nice to meet you. 1227 00:45:50,266 --> 00:45:51,233 [Joe] Here we go. 1228 00:45:51,300 --> 00:45:52,735 - Oh. - Here we go, Q. 1229 00:45:52,802 --> 00:45:54,804 You've seen the job description. 1230 00:45:54,871 --> 00:45:56,339 - I have. Yeah. - Correct? 1231 00:45:56,405 --> 00:45:58,641 - I got it right here. - Two words, under qualified. 1232 00:45:58,708 --> 00:46:01,477 Two words, under qualified, but willing to learn. 1233 00:46:01,544 --> 00:46:03,512 Willing to learn. That's great. 1234 00:46:03,579 --> 00:46:04,747 [laughs] 1235 00:46:04,814 --> 00:46:07,450 Can you describe your style of management? 1236 00:46:07,516 --> 00:46:09,086 - My style of management? - Mmm-hmm. 1237 00:46:09,151 --> 00:46:10,453 Sure, well, my nickname's Crab Cake, 1238 00:46:10,519 --> 00:46:11,955 so if that's any indication... 1239 00:46:12,022 --> 00:46:14,357 My nickname... All my, uh... 1240 00:46:14,423 --> 00:46:16,258 All my workers call me Crab Cakes, 1241 00:46:16,325 --> 00:46:17,760 if that's any indication. 1242 00:46:17,827 --> 00:46:18,962 - Yeah. - Really? 1243 00:46:19,029 --> 00:46:20,030 - Yeah, Crab Cakes. - Yeah. 1244 00:46:20,097 --> 00:46:21,430 [laughter] 1245 00:46:21,497 --> 00:46:23,199 If the guys want to call me Crab Cakes, 1246 00:46:23,265 --> 00:46:26,069 - hey, call me Crab Cakes. - [laughter] 1247 00:46:26,135 --> 00:46:27,570 - [Joe] Off topic... - Off topic... 1248 00:46:27,637 --> 00:46:29,906 Is that stupid mascot of yours a woodpecker? 1249 00:46:29,973 --> 00:46:31,273 What is that thing? 1250 00:46:31,340 --> 00:46:34,243 Is that... That stupid mascot you have, 1251 00:46:34,310 --> 00:46:35,946 is that a woodpecker, what is that thing? 1252 00:46:36,013 --> 00:46:37,647 [laughter] 1253 00:46:37,713 --> 00:46:39,281 - I can't even look. - Oh, my God. 1254 00:46:39,348 --> 00:46:41,450 - I can't even look. - [Murr] It's a hawk. 1255 00:46:41,517 --> 00:46:42,752 I don't know what you call that bird. 1256 00:46:42,818 --> 00:46:44,353 Yeah? Oh, it looks like a woodpecker. 1257 00:46:44,420 --> 00:46:45,554 [imitating Woody Woodpecker's laugh] 1258 00:46:45,621 --> 00:46:47,090 [imitating Woody Woodpecker's laugh] 1259 00:46:47,156 --> 00:46:48,658 [laughter] 1260 00:46:48,724 --> 00:46:49,792 [laughs] Yeah. 1261 00:46:49,860 --> 00:46:51,494 Tell me a little bit about yourself. 1262 00:46:51,560 --> 00:46:53,796 Will I be pissing in a cup for a drug test? 1263 00:46:54,563 --> 00:46:56,599 Do you know, is, um... 1264 00:46:56,666 --> 00:46:58,734 [stammering] 1265 00:46:58,801 --> 00:47:00,169 [laughter] 1266 00:47:01,872 --> 00:47:03,272 He doesn't want to say it. 1267 00:47:03,339 --> 00:47:05,207 Yeah, I really tanked this one. 1268 00:47:05,274 --> 00:47:07,176 There's no way I'm going to see Abdul. 1269 00:47:07,243 --> 00:47:10,013 There's no way I'm going to see Paula Abdul. 1270 00:47:10,080 --> 00:47:12,481 [laughter] 1271 00:47:12,548 --> 00:47:13,950 Explain the plot of the movie. 1272 00:47:14,017 --> 00:47:15,418 We're four high school friends. 1273 00:47:15,484 --> 00:47:17,954 So we're on a road trip for redemption 1274 00:47:18,021 --> 00:47:20,489 for an incident that happened back in 1990, 1275 00:47:20,556 --> 00:47:22,025 like, coming back to haunt us now. 1276 00:47:22,092 --> 00:47:24,161 And there's only three tickets to see Abdul, 1277 00:47:24,226 --> 00:47:26,629 and one of us can't go. 1278 00:47:26,696 --> 00:47:28,831 - Rate our movie. - The movie's 3 1/2 stars. 1279 00:47:28,899 --> 00:47:30,633 The movie's gonna be 3 1/2 stars. 1280 00:47:30,700 --> 00:47:31,968 [laughter] 1281 00:47:32,035 --> 00:47:33,469 This interview is bullshit. 1282 00:47:33,536 --> 00:47:36,305 - [laughs] - [laughter] 1283 00:47:36,372 --> 00:47:38,207 [laughing] This interview is bullshit. 1284 00:47:38,274 --> 00:47:41,011 [laughter] 1285 00:47:41,078 --> 00:47:43,446 [laughing] [Q] Thank you. 1286 00:47:43,512 --> 00:47:45,214 It's total bullshit. 1287 00:47:45,281 --> 00:47:46,382 [laughter] 1288 00:47:46,449 --> 00:47:49,218 It's all for a movie. 1289 00:47:49,285 --> 00:47:50,954 [buzzer blares] 1290 00:47:51,021 --> 00:47:52,989 Hey, buddy, everything look cozy? 1291 00:47:53,056 --> 00:47:54,858 Yep. What's that? 1292 00:47:54,925 --> 00:47:56,692 [Joe] That's Chase, you met him at a Big Brother program. 1293 00:47:56,759 --> 00:47:58,561 Then you lost him, and now he's your guardian angel 1294 00:47:58,627 --> 00:48:00,964 that looks over you during all the big events, 1295 00:48:01,031 --> 00:48:02,231 including job interviews. 1296 00:48:02,298 --> 00:48:03,632 - Hey. - Oh, hey, yeah, yeah. 1297 00:48:03,699 --> 00:48:05,835 How are you? Very random. 1298 00:48:05,902 --> 00:48:08,838 - That's actually Chase. - Okay. Great. 1299 00:48:08,905 --> 00:48:10,040 He was my Little Brother, 1300 00:48:10,107 --> 00:48:11,141 in the Little Brother, Big Brother program. 1301 00:48:11,208 --> 00:48:12,508 Okay. 1302 00:48:12,575 --> 00:48:13,910 He's like my guardian angel, inspiration. 1303 00:48:13,977 --> 00:48:15,444 He's gonna look over the interview for me. 1304 00:48:15,511 --> 00:48:16,812 - Oh, I think that's great. - Thank you. 1305 00:48:16,880 --> 00:48:18,447 I was like, did someone leave anything? 1306 00:48:18,514 --> 00:48:19,515 - Oh, no, what is your name? - Brandy. Brandy. 1307 00:48:19,582 --> 00:48:20,616 - Brandy. - Yeah, sorry. 1308 00:48:20,683 --> 00:48:22,085 - Nice to meet you. - I'm Sal. 1309 00:48:22,152 --> 00:48:23,186 Immediately launch into why the Earth is flat. 1310 00:48:23,252 --> 00:48:24,353 [laughs] 1311 00:48:24,420 --> 00:48:25,521 I like talking to people 1312 00:48:25,588 --> 00:48:26,857 about all different types of things. 1313 00:48:26,923 --> 00:48:28,257 - Right. - You know, for example, like, 1314 00:48:28,324 --> 00:48:30,326 no denying it for me that the, 1315 00:48:30,392 --> 00:48:32,095 you know, I believe the Earth is flat. 1316 00:48:32,162 --> 00:48:33,997 So I like to talk about that. 1317 00:48:34,064 --> 00:48:35,264 Okay. Great. 1318 00:48:35,331 --> 00:48:36,900 [laughter] 1319 00:48:36,967 --> 00:48:38,567 How do you feel about the shape of the Earth? 1320 00:48:38,634 --> 00:48:41,637 What is your opinion on the shape of the Earth? 1321 00:48:41,704 --> 00:48:43,305 - Um... - [Q] There's the look. 1322 00:48:43,372 --> 00:48:47,210 I mean, I'm pretty literal, so I'm gonna go with round. 1323 00:48:47,276 --> 00:48:48,677 Yeah, most people think it's round. 1324 00:48:48,744 --> 00:48:50,646 - Yeah. - But they'd be wrong. 1325 00:48:50,713 --> 00:48:52,715 [laughter] 1326 00:48:52,782 --> 00:48:54,383 They told me to bring a recommendation, 1327 00:48:54,450 --> 00:48:55,952 - so I brought one. - They said to bring a rec... 1328 00:48:56,019 --> 00:48:59,222 A recommendation too, and I also have a recommendation. 1329 00:48:59,288 --> 00:49:00,790 Sal, pull out the iPad there. 1330 00:49:00,857 --> 00:49:02,324 Uh, so here. 1331 00:49:05,327 --> 00:49:06,863 It's Sal's mom, Adele. 1332 00:49:06,930 --> 00:49:08,397 [laughter] 1333 00:49:08,464 --> 00:49:11,700 Please hire him. He'd be a good employee. 1334 00:49:11,767 --> 00:49:14,303 He doesn't steal. He's a good boy. 1335 00:49:14,370 --> 00:49:16,639 He pays me to clean his house, 1336 00:49:16,705 --> 00:49:18,307 so please, please, please hire him 1337 00:49:18,374 --> 00:49:20,110 so he can keep paying me. 1338 00:49:20,177 --> 00:49:21,710 [laughter] 1339 00:49:21,777 --> 00:49:24,047 [Q] Oh, my God. That's awesome. 1340 00:49:25,215 --> 00:49:27,117 - You good? - Ah, hell, nah! 1341 00:49:27,184 --> 00:49:30,153 Instead of "Oh, hell, no," do the singing version of it. 1342 00:49:30,220 --> 00:49:31,353 ♪ Hell, no ♪ 1343 00:49:31,420 --> 00:49:33,722 ♪ To the no, no, no ♪ 1344 00:49:35,391 --> 00:49:38,394 - I'm so sorry. - It's okay. 1345 00:49:38,460 --> 00:49:40,362 - What are you writing? - What, what are you... 1346 00:49:40,429 --> 00:49:41,564 What are you writing? 1347 00:49:43,432 --> 00:49:45,035 - My notes. - Oh, great. Perfect. 1348 00:49:45,101 --> 00:49:47,436 [laughter and clapping] 1349 00:49:47,503 --> 00:49:48,771 Take notes. 1350 00:49:48,838 --> 00:49:50,773 [Murr] Yeah, Sal, take notes on her. 1351 00:49:50,840 --> 00:49:52,341 [laughter] 1352 00:49:54,810 --> 00:49:56,445 [laughter] 1353 00:49:56,512 --> 00:49:59,415 Sal, just go, "Are there one T or two in 'pretty'?" 1354 00:49:59,481 --> 00:50:02,052 [laughter] 1355 00:50:02,118 --> 00:50:03,752 Ah, done! 1356 00:50:03,819 --> 00:50:06,990 - Done, boys. - Well done. 1357 00:50:07,057 --> 00:50:08,357 [buzzer blares] 1358 00:50:08,424 --> 00:50:10,927 Okay, so this is my outfit. 1359 00:50:10,994 --> 00:50:14,197 [Sal] Yeah, Joey in a breakaway basketball warmup suit. 1360 00:50:14,264 --> 00:50:15,497 So as soon as the person comes in, 1361 00:50:15,564 --> 00:50:17,566 you just get ready for game time. 1362 00:50:19,735 --> 00:50:21,238 - Hey, how are you? - Good. How are you? 1363 00:50:21,304 --> 00:50:22,705 - [Sal] Big hug. - Nice to see you. 1364 00:50:22,771 --> 00:50:24,573 - Emily. Nice to meet you. - It's nice to meet you. 1365 00:50:24,640 --> 00:50:26,742 - Yeah, I'm ready to do this. - Oh, here you go. 1366 00:50:26,809 --> 00:50:28,945 - That's amazing. - Right? 1367 00:50:29,012 --> 00:50:30,046 That is awesome. 1368 00:50:30,113 --> 00:50:31,814 [laughter] 1369 00:50:31,882 --> 00:50:33,382 So nice to meet you. I'm Emily. 1370 00:50:33,449 --> 00:50:34,817 I'm the building security manager. 1371 00:50:34,885 --> 00:50:36,319 - Building security manager? - Yes, sir, so... 1372 00:50:36,385 --> 00:50:37,320 And what was your name again? I'm sorry. 1373 00:50:37,386 --> 00:50:39,022 Emily. Yes, sir. 1374 00:50:39,089 --> 00:50:41,091 I'm gonna let you get started other than that amazing intro. 1375 00:50:41,157 --> 00:50:42,758 - Oh, thank you. - Joe, where are you from? 1376 00:50:42,825 --> 00:50:44,127 Tell me a little bit about yourself. 1377 00:50:44,194 --> 00:50:45,362 Nah, nah. 1378 00:50:45,427 --> 00:50:47,429 Nah, I didn't want to... 1379 00:50:47,496 --> 00:50:48,797 I didn't really want to get into that. 1380 00:50:48,865 --> 00:50:50,499 [laughter] 1381 00:50:50,566 --> 00:50:52,369 What's that? Which part. 1382 00:50:52,434 --> 00:50:54,570 My past. My shadowy past. 1383 00:50:54,637 --> 00:50:56,940 My shadowy past. I didn't really want to start... 1384 00:50:57,007 --> 00:50:58,641 [laughter] 1385 00:50:58,707 --> 00:51:00,277 Keep saying "off the record." 1386 00:51:00,343 --> 00:51:01,677 - Off the record... - Mmm-hmm. 1387 00:51:01,744 --> 00:51:03,914 I negotiated prices for, like, bulk supplies. 1388 00:51:03,980 --> 00:51:05,547 - Mmm-hmm. - I would let them in 1389 00:51:05,614 --> 00:51:07,083 on the, to the side. 1390 00:51:07,150 --> 00:51:08,952 Joe, she's writing this down. It's off the record. 1391 00:51:09,019 --> 00:51:10,719 Yeah, but this is all off the... 1392 00:51:10,786 --> 00:51:12,389 - This is all off the record. - No, no, you're fine. 1393 00:51:12,454 --> 00:51:13,522 I'm just talking about your extension of knowledge with... 1394 00:51:13,589 --> 00:51:14,958 Got it, got it. 1395 00:51:15,025 --> 00:51:16,393 Um, what else can I tell you off the record? 1396 00:51:16,458 --> 00:51:18,194 Joe, have a roving finger. 1397 00:51:18,261 --> 00:51:20,096 There was one time when a whole crew was in here, 1398 00:51:20,163 --> 00:51:21,898 and they had to actually be on the other side of the campus, 1399 00:51:21,965 --> 00:51:23,867 but the middle was closed, so I couldn't get them through. 1400 00:51:23,934 --> 00:51:25,434 We had to actually go around the whole thing. 1401 00:51:25,501 --> 00:51:26,669 - But off the record. - Off the record, Monica. 1402 00:51:26,735 --> 00:51:27,569 Off the record, we went through 1403 00:51:27,636 --> 00:51:28,872 the closed road, Monica. 1404 00:51:28,939 --> 00:51:30,506 Here comes the moving finger. 1405 00:51:30,572 --> 00:51:31,740 And, you know, there was a lot of teams up here, 1406 00:51:31,807 --> 00:51:32,876 and then we brought it down south. 1407 00:51:32,943 --> 00:51:34,610 You know, you connect everybody, 1408 00:51:34,677 --> 00:51:36,612 and they all have their own conferences and stuff, 1409 00:51:36,679 --> 00:51:38,281 but, uh, I have stopped... 1410 00:51:38,348 --> 00:51:40,649 Excuse yourself for one quick moment to go to the bathroom 1411 00:51:40,716 --> 00:51:42,518 and then go downstairs and play basketball. 1412 00:51:42,584 --> 00:51:44,820 Um, I need to use the restroom real quick. 1413 00:51:44,888 --> 00:51:46,256 - I'm sorry. - Yeah, sure, no worries. 1414 00:51:46,323 --> 00:51:47,991 - I'll be right back. - Yeah. 1415 00:51:48,992 --> 00:51:50,093 I'll be right back. I'm sorry. 1416 00:51:50,160 --> 00:51:51,760 - Yeah, okay. - Thanks. 1417 00:51:53,229 --> 00:51:55,899 - [Murr] Look at her face! - [laughter] 1418 00:52:01,503 --> 00:52:03,639 [Q] This is gonna be amazing. [Sal] Her face is... 1419 00:52:03,706 --> 00:52:05,041 [basketball thumping] 1420 00:52:05,108 --> 00:52:06,508 [laughter] 1421 00:52:08,078 --> 00:52:09,346 [yelps] 1422 00:52:09,412 --> 00:52:11,081 [laughter] 1423 00:52:15,651 --> 00:52:16,886 [Joe whispers] Almost. 1424 00:52:16,953 --> 00:52:19,189 Joey, uh, security really sucks around here. 1425 00:52:19,255 --> 00:52:20,857 [breathing heavily] 1426 00:52:20,924 --> 00:52:22,959 - You good? - Yeah, security really sucks. 1427 00:52:23,026 --> 00:52:25,061 I was able just to go down there and shoot hoops. 1428 00:52:25,128 --> 00:52:27,097 [laughter] 1429 00:52:29,199 --> 00:52:30,632 [laughter] 1430 00:52:31,633 --> 00:52:33,602 - Yeah. - So security's an issue. 1431 00:52:34,137 --> 00:52:35,038 Yeah. 1432 00:52:35,105 --> 00:52:37,273 Security's an issue. 1433 00:52:37,340 --> 00:52:40,210 All right, well, do you have any further questions for me? 1434 00:52:40,276 --> 00:52:42,778 Tell her you'll be in touch and she did great. 1435 00:52:42,845 --> 00:52:44,014 And, uh, that's it. Yeah, thank you so much. 1436 00:52:44,080 --> 00:52:46,749 You did great. We'll be in touch. 1437 00:52:46,815 --> 00:52:48,151 I'll get Jakim to, uh... 1438 00:52:48,218 --> 00:52:50,586 Hey, appreciate it. Yeah, we'll let you know. 1439 00:52:51,955 --> 00:52:53,423 Possibly. Maybe we'll hire her. 1440 00:52:53,490 --> 00:52:55,225 [laughter] 1441 00:52:55,291 --> 00:52:56,426 Maybe we'll hire her. 1442 00:52:56,493 --> 00:52:57,360 I'm not sure if we'll hire her. 1443 00:52:57,427 --> 00:52:59,229 [bell dings] 1444 00:52:59,295 --> 00:53:00,864 [upbeat rock music] 1445 00:53:03,599 --> 00:53:05,101 - A left right here? - Go. 1446 00:53:05,168 --> 00:53:07,103 Yeah, baby, yeah! 1447 00:53:07,170 --> 00:53:09,571 Disgusting loading dock. Nice, guys. 1448 00:53:12,409 --> 00:53:13,842 [laughs] 1449 00:53:13,910 --> 00:53:15,879 Now do you want to tell me why we're here? 1450 00:53:15,945 --> 00:53:17,247 We're just gonna pop into 1451 00:53:17,313 --> 00:53:18,714 this social media convention real quick. 1452 00:53:18,781 --> 00:53:20,849 - Uh-huh. - Here's your credentials. 1453 00:53:20,917 --> 00:53:22,452 We're having fun with you today at your expense. 1454 00:53:22,519 --> 00:53:24,921 Hey, bud, uh, you're, uh... You're on in ten minutes. 1455 00:53:24,988 --> 00:53:26,156 [laughter] 1456 00:53:26,222 --> 00:53:28,324 You're terrible at social networking, so... 1457 00:53:32,228 --> 00:53:33,329 Give it up one more time 1458 00:53:33,396 --> 00:53:35,065 for your When Brands Take a Stand panel. 1459 00:53:35,131 --> 00:53:37,400 [applause] 1460 00:53:37,467 --> 00:53:39,302 [Sal] So we are at the Social Shake-Up, 1461 00:53:39,369 --> 00:53:42,738 which is a tremendous social media conference here, 1462 00:53:42,805 --> 00:53:45,075 and Q is about to go up and give a presentation. 1463 00:53:45,141 --> 00:53:46,708 - Yeah. - We wrote the presentation. 1464 00:53:46,775 --> 00:53:48,644 He's never seen a single one of these slides. 1465 00:53:48,710 --> 00:53:50,080 There's 600 people here, 1466 00:53:50,146 --> 00:53:52,048 which is a little more than we usually have. 1467 00:53:52,115 --> 00:53:53,283 A little more? 1468 00:53:53,349 --> 00:53:57,087 We do have a last-minute addition to the roster. 1469 00:53:57,153 --> 00:53:59,856 We have a new speaker coming up. 1470 00:53:59,923 --> 00:54:01,757 We have been trying to do this for years. 1471 00:54:01,824 --> 00:54:04,994 Please welcome to the stage Peter Foaks. 1472 00:54:06,529 --> 00:54:07,629 - Peter Foaks. - [laughs] 1473 00:54:07,696 --> 00:54:09,365 [applause] 1474 00:54:12,402 --> 00:54:13,802 Good morning, everybody. 1475 00:54:13,870 --> 00:54:15,704 Very excited to be here. Thank you for having me. 1476 00:54:15,771 --> 00:54:16,973 My name is Peter Foaks. 1477 00:54:17,040 --> 00:54:18,541 They brought me here 'cause I'm... 1478 00:54:18,640 --> 00:54:20,977 really been doing well as a social media influencer, 1479 00:54:21,044 --> 00:54:23,745 so why don't we get started. 1480 00:54:23,812 --> 00:54:26,682 How to Become a Social Media Influencer, 1481 00:54:26,748 --> 00:54:29,718 or as my dad calls it, "not have a real job." 1482 00:54:29,785 --> 00:54:31,554 [laughter] 1483 00:54:31,620 --> 00:54:33,957 So here we go. 1484 00:54:34,023 --> 00:54:36,192 His world after this is gonna change. 1485 00:54:36,259 --> 00:54:38,461 We may not be friends after this moment. 1486 00:54:38,528 --> 00:54:40,063 I recently interviewed 1487 00:54:40,130 --> 00:54:41,965 social media influencer Franz Goldberg. 1488 00:54:42,031 --> 00:54:44,100 Do you guys know who that is? 1489 00:54:44,167 --> 00:54:45,969 Ah, you're gonna love this. Okay. 1490 00:54:46,035 --> 00:54:47,703 Hi, my name is Franz Goldberg, 1491 00:54:47,769 --> 00:54:50,039 and I'm what you would call a social media influencer. 1492 00:54:50,106 --> 00:54:52,208 My major platform is YouTube. 1493 00:54:52,275 --> 00:54:54,010 Advertisers want to... [sound distorts] 1494 00:54:54,077 --> 00:54:56,312 ...and I can provide them... 1495 00:54:56,379 --> 00:54:58,448 - [knocking] - It's interrupting. 1496 00:54:58,515 --> 00:55:01,618 [smooth electronic music] 1497 00:55:01,683 --> 00:55:03,553 Did somebody call a plumber? 1498 00:55:03,620 --> 00:55:06,688 Yes. I need my pipes cleaned. 1499 00:55:06,755 --> 00:55:09,926 [laughter] 1500 00:55:09,993 --> 00:55:11,727 That's Q's parents! 1501 00:55:11,793 --> 00:55:13,196 That's Q's real parents. 1502 00:55:13,263 --> 00:55:16,533 - I can help with that. - Oh, goody. 1503 00:55:16,599 --> 00:55:17,567 Come this way. 1504 00:55:17,634 --> 00:55:18,667 [Q's dad] Oh, yeah. 1505 00:55:18,734 --> 00:55:20,436 Good pipes. Oh. 1506 00:55:20,503 --> 00:55:22,438 Oh, yes. 1507 00:55:22,505 --> 00:55:24,840 ...place them at the end of my video. 1508 00:55:24,908 --> 00:55:27,210 I like to place them inside... 1509 00:55:27,277 --> 00:55:28,844 [laughter] 1510 00:55:33,483 --> 00:55:36,519 I must have recorded over an old tape on that one. 1511 00:55:36,586 --> 00:55:38,922 [laughing] 1512 00:55:39,656 --> 00:55:41,224 Also, um... 1513 00:55:41,291 --> 00:55:44,394 you probably shouldn't use tapes in the modern era, 1514 00:55:44,460 --> 00:55:46,596 'cause of accidents like that. 1515 00:55:46,663 --> 00:55:48,932 You know, digital... digital... 1516 00:55:48,998 --> 00:55:51,201 I would say digital is the way to go. 1517 00:55:51,267 --> 00:55:53,570 - [laughter] - He can't even speak. 1518 00:55:53,636 --> 00:55:55,804 His mind is blown. 1519 00:55:55,872 --> 00:56:00,210 Okay, well, look, identify the major brands 1520 00:56:01,477 --> 00:56:03,179 that fit with your brands. 1521 00:56:03,246 --> 00:56:05,882 You know, stay on brand is basically what I'm saying. 1522 00:56:05,949 --> 00:56:08,084 Uh, oh, no. 1523 00:56:09,586 --> 00:56:12,121 Oh, I hope this one doesn't get interrupted, buddy. 1524 00:56:12,188 --> 00:56:14,324 Well, why don't we give a listen 1525 00:56:14,390 --> 00:56:17,427 to what Franz Goldberg has to say about brands. 1526 00:56:17,493 --> 00:56:18,895 Oh. 1527 00:56:18,962 --> 00:56:20,263 You think they would have just brought Franz here, 1528 00:56:20,330 --> 00:56:22,899 but no, we got tape. 1529 00:56:22,966 --> 00:56:24,601 My audience likes that I'm real. 1530 00:56:24,667 --> 00:56:27,170 - They don't want to be fed... - It's just gonna go right... 1531 00:56:27,237 --> 00:56:29,539 Oh, this is funny. There... There's Dad. 1532 00:56:29,606 --> 00:56:30,673 [smooth music] 1533 00:56:30,739 --> 00:56:33,176 Well, hello there. 1534 00:56:33,243 --> 00:56:35,645 - [laughter] - May I help you? 1535 00:56:35,712 --> 00:56:37,614 I'm here to plant some seed. 1536 00:56:37,680 --> 00:56:39,182 [laughter] 1537 00:56:39,249 --> 00:56:41,817 He's a gardener. You can tell by his hat. 1538 00:56:41,884 --> 00:56:44,387 Let me show you where you can plant it. 1539 00:56:44,454 --> 00:56:46,556 Yes, come on. 1540 00:56:46,623 --> 00:56:48,358 That bush needs trimming. 1541 00:56:48,424 --> 00:56:49,791 [laughter] 1542 00:56:52,128 --> 00:56:53,863 My dad had a lot of side jobs. 1543 00:56:53,930 --> 00:56:56,798 - So did your mom. - So did your mom, apparently. 1544 00:56:57,766 --> 00:56:59,469 So did my mom, apparently. 1545 00:57:02,005 --> 00:57:03,439 Are there any questions? 1546 00:57:03,506 --> 00:57:05,141 [laughter] 1547 00:57:05,208 --> 00:57:06,409 No? No questions. 1548 00:57:06,476 --> 00:57:07,910 I-I didn't think so. 1549 00:57:07,977 --> 00:57:09,979 All right, well, I have a few questions myself. 1550 00:57:12,315 --> 00:57:13,616 - Thank you. - Well done, buddy. 1551 00:57:13,683 --> 00:57:15,018 Well done. 1552 00:57:15,084 --> 00:57:16,986 - Come on, come on, come on. - Bring it in. 1553 00:57:17,053 --> 00:57:19,889 [Q's mom] Hey, Brian. Dad's on his way. 1554 00:57:19,956 --> 00:57:22,025 - How did it go? - How did it go? 1555 00:57:22,091 --> 00:57:23,660 - Brian. - Yeah. 1556 00:57:23,726 --> 00:57:26,262 I didn't know who was gonna be more embarrassed. 1557 00:57:26,329 --> 00:57:27,930 - You or us. - Well, I'll tell you what. 1558 00:57:27,997 --> 00:57:29,565 It didn't look like you guys were embarrassed. 1559 00:57:29,632 --> 00:57:31,534 Hey, Mr. and Mrs. Quinn, I'll be by next week 1560 00:57:31,601 --> 00:57:32,635 to film the sequel, okay? 1561 00:57:32,702 --> 00:57:34,203 All right, get out of here. 1562 00:57:34,270 --> 00:57:36,805 Don't answer the phone when they call anymore, okay? 1563 00:57:36,873 --> 00:57:38,141 All right, love you, Ma. I love you, Dad. 1564 00:57:38,207 --> 00:57:39,509 I'll talk to you guys in a little bit. 1565 00:57:39,575 --> 00:57:42,245 [mellow music] 1566 00:57:46,015 --> 00:57:48,651 - [whistles] - All right, here it is. 1567 00:57:48,718 --> 00:57:50,386 - [laughs] - [Sal] Oh, yeah. 1568 00:57:50,453 --> 00:57:52,355 - There's an event going on. - What is it? 1569 00:57:52,422 --> 00:57:54,524 - Right now, what is it? - Okay. 1570 00:57:54,590 --> 00:57:57,160 - Sally, one of your closest friends is in town tonight. - Yeah. 1571 00:57:57,226 --> 00:57:58,594 Jaden Smith has a movie premiere. 1572 00:57:58,661 --> 00:58:00,396 - [laughter] - Stop it. 1573 00:58:00,463 --> 00:58:02,332 All right, Sal, so now you're Jaden's number one fan, 1574 00:58:02,398 --> 00:58:03,933 and all you gotta do is just walk around 1575 00:58:04,000 --> 00:58:05,068 and let people know it. 1576 00:58:05,134 --> 00:58:07,403 All right, where's our boy? 1577 00:58:07,470 --> 00:58:08,638 I feel like an idiot. 1578 00:58:08,705 --> 00:58:10,907 [Joe] Let me see that tattoo, buddy. 1579 00:58:10,973 --> 00:58:12,342 Hi, can I take a picture of your tattoo? 1580 00:58:12,408 --> 00:58:14,210 - Yeah, yeah, sure, sure. - Nice shorts. 1581 00:58:14,277 --> 00:58:16,813 - I'm just his number one fan. - Honestly, I see it. 1582 00:58:16,879 --> 00:58:18,448 I really see it. 1583 00:58:18,514 --> 00:58:20,550 [Joe] Guys, now do you see what I had envisioned 1584 00:58:20,616 --> 00:58:22,085 so many seasons ago? 1585 00:58:22,151 --> 00:58:23,319 All right, Sal, you're up. 1586 00:58:23,386 --> 00:58:24,620 Three, two, one. 1587 00:58:25,855 --> 00:58:27,323 [laughter] 1588 00:58:30,760 --> 00:58:31,928 Look! 1589 00:58:31,994 --> 00:58:33,763 Jaden Smith, number one fan. 1590 00:58:33,830 --> 00:58:35,698 I'm his number one fan. 1591 00:58:35,765 --> 00:58:37,633 Act like his number one fan, buddy! 1592 00:58:37,700 --> 00:58:38,935 I'm his number one fan. 1593 00:58:39,001 --> 00:58:40,169 You think you're Jaden's number one fan? 1594 00:58:40,236 --> 00:58:41,637 - Yeah, I do. - You got this shirt? 1595 00:58:41,704 --> 00:58:43,106 - I wish I had the shirt. - You got the tat, though? 1596 00:58:43,172 --> 00:58:44,574 - Let's do, oh. - Come on. 1597 00:58:46,476 --> 00:58:48,911 - You know Jaden's blood type? - There you go. 1598 00:58:48,978 --> 00:58:50,813 - [imitates buzzer] Wrong! - What is it? 1599 00:58:50,880 --> 00:58:52,115 - A-negative. - Yeah, right. 1600 00:58:52,181 --> 00:58:53,449 - Yeah, it is. - [laughter] 1601 00:58:53,516 --> 00:58:55,752 Sal, I need a little bit more crazy eyes. 1602 00:58:55,818 --> 00:58:58,287 [overlapping chatter] 1603 00:58:58,354 --> 00:59:00,189 - Has anybody seen him? - Can I see your tattoo? 1604 00:59:00,256 --> 00:59:01,691 I gotta meet him. I gotta meet him. 1605 00:59:01,758 --> 00:59:03,259 Yo, pal, do you know when the Q&A is with Jaden? 1606 00:59:03,326 --> 00:59:04,827 Do you know when the Q&A is? 1607 00:59:04,894 --> 00:59:06,162 [laughter] 1608 00:59:06,229 --> 00:59:07,764 It's just wait and hold. 1609 00:59:07,830 --> 00:59:09,165 Wait and hold? 1610 00:59:09,232 --> 00:59:10,533 - Do you know where Jaden is? - What? 1611 00:59:10,600 --> 00:59:12,034 - Do you know where Jaden is? - I don't. 1612 00:59:12,101 --> 00:59:13,002 - I'm so sorry. - You're no help to me. 1613 00:59:13,069 --> 00:59:15,505 [laughter] 1614 00:59:15,571 --> 00:59:18,608 Jaden's movie has now ended, and there's a Q&A afterward. 1615 00:59:18,674 --> 00:59:20,710 - This is awesome. - [Murr] There he is. 1616 00:59:20,777 --> 00:59:23,079 There's Jaden. 1617 00:59:23,146 --> 00:59:25,848 Before we do that, I just wanted to start off... 1618 00:59:25,915 --> 00:59:28,518 Um... 1619 00:59:28,584 --> 00:59:29,519 [Joe] Hop up, Sal. 1620 00:59:29,585 --> 00:59:30,820 [laughter] 1621 00:59:30,888 --> 00:59:32,488 So I have a million questions, 1622 00:59:32,555 --> 00:59:34,858 but do we have some questions out here from the audience? 1623 00:59:34,924 --> 00:59:36,125 Come on, buddy. Get into it. 1624 00:59:36,192 --> 00:59:37,895 - Oh! Oh! - Do we have a really good one? 1625 00:59:37,960 --> 00:59:39,128 So we have a question right over here. 1626 00:59:39,195 --> 00:59:41,297 Oh, yes! Yes! 1627 00:59:41,831 --> 00:59:42,999 Whoo! 1628 00:59:43,065 --> 00:59:45,134 [cheering] 1629 00:59:45,201 --> 00:59:47,036 I'm just the number one Jaden Smith fan. 1630 00:59:47,103 --> 00:59:49,539 I'm just Jaden's number one fan. 1631 00:59:49,605 --> 00:59:50,540 Can we hug? 1632 00:59:50,606 --> 00:59:52,175 Why don't you just come on up here? 1633 00:59:52,241 --> 00:59:53,409 Can I .really? Oh, thank you guys so much!@ 1634 00:59:53,476 --> 00:59:55,244 - Would you guys mind? - Come on up! 1635 00:59:55,311 --> 00:59:56,813 - Thank you, thank you. - [Murr] What Sal doesn't know 1636 00:59:56,880 --> 00:59:58,781 is that Jaden is in cahoots with us this whole time 1637 00:59:58,848 --> 01:00:00,851 - Yes. - [Joe] Oh, look at those shorts. 1638 01:00:00,918 --> 01:00:04,687 Wow, wow. Come on over. 1639 01:00:04,754 --> 01:00:06,656 Come on over. Wow. 1640 01:00:06,722 --> 01:00:08,424 Thanks for coming out. 1641 01:00:08,491 --> 01:00:10,393 Oh, cool. This is very cool. 1642 01:00:10,460 --> 01:00:13,529 Thank you so much. Ah, bam! 1643 01:00:13,596 --> 01:00:15,097 - Wow. - [cheers and applause] 1644 01:00:15,164 --> 01:00:17,033 - [laughter] - Are you serious? 1645 01:00:17,099 --> 01:00:18,869 - That is... - Oh, my God, ah! 1646 01:00:18,936 --> 01:00:20,770 - Are you serious? - Ah! 1647 01:00:20,837 --> 01:00:22,371 [Jaden] Are you serious? 1648 01:00:22,438 --> 01:00:23,941 I got this a few years ago. 1649 01:00:24,006 --> 01:00:25,374 Been waiting to show it to you. 1650 01:00:25,441 --> 01:00:27,343 I just feel like I look a lot different. 1651 01:00:27,410 --> 01:00:29,479 Maybe we could get it, like, redone. 1652 01:00:29,545 --> 01:00:31,781 Sal, just say, "Well, I do have this other thigh." 1653 01:00:31,848 --> 01:00:34,217 Revamped. Something. 1654 01:00:34,283 --> 01:00:35,184 - [Joe] There you go, Sal. - Just 'cause it's old. 1655 01:00:35,251 --> 01:00:36,586 It's just old. 1656 01:00:36,652 --> 01:00:39,522 You know, I feel like if it was newer... 1657 01:00:40,423 --> 01:00:41,190 I... 1658 01:00:41,257 --> 01:00:42,758 I do have this other thigh. 1659 01:00:42,825 --> 01:00:44,360 - I could get an updated one... - [cheers and applause] 1660 01:00:46,897 --> 01:00:49,098 You need anything, buddy? 1661 01:00:49,165 --> 01:00:50,233 [tattoo needle buzzing] 1662 01:00:50,299 --> 01:00:53,035 - I'm good, I guess. - Not you. 1663 01:00:53,102 --> 01:00:55,104 Yes, I'm fine, Joe. Thank you. 1664 01:00:57,573 --> 01:00:59,108 That's it, I think we're done. 1665 01:00:59,175 --> 01:01:00,376 - Yeah! - [cheering] 1666 01:01:00,443 --> 01:01:03,012 [Joe] We did it! We did it! 1667 01:01:03,079 --> 01:01:05,147 - Oh! - Oh, I gotta see this! 1668 01:01:05,214 --> 01:01:06,182 Are you ready to meet yourself? 1669 01:01:06,249 --> 01:01:08,919 - Hold on. - Three, two, one! 1670 01:01:08,986 --> 01:01:12,288 - [all cheering] - Oh, my God! 1671 01:01:13,689 --> 01:01:14,858 Whoa! 1672 01:01:14,925 --> 01:01:16,626 That might be the best tattoo I've ever seen. 1673 01:01:16,692 --> 01:01:18,794 This is definitely better than the last one. 1674 01:01:18,862 --> 01:01:20,363 [laughter] 1675 01:01:20,429 --> 01:01:22,498 My guy. My guy. 1676 01:01:22,565 --> 01:01:24,667 Jaden, we'll see you in five years? 1677 01:01:24,734 --> 01:01:26,937 - Oh, yeah. - [laughter] 1678 01:01:27,004 --> 01:01:28,437 Hopefully before then. 1679 01:01:30,941 --> 01:01:33,576 [muffled dance music] 1680 01:01:41,183 --> 01:01:43,419 I know. It's just like Ibiza. 1681 01:01:43,486 --> 01:01:44,720 Hey, bud. What's up? 1682 01:01:46,756 --> 01:01:48,324 [woman] Is that the Molly? 1683 01:01:48,391 --> 01:01:50,259 It's not the Molly. 1684 01:01:50,326 --> 01:01:51,761 DJ, bring down the beat. 1685 01:01:53,129 --> 01:01:55,598 Uh, what is this shit? 1686 01:01:55,665 --> 01:01:56,766 What's that, bud? 1687 01:01:58,167 --> 01:02:00,369 Hey, hey, hey! Here we go! 1688 01:02:00,436 --> 01:02:02,338 Now it's a party! Later, Q. 1689 01:02:02,973 --> 01:02:04,307 Okay. 1690 01:02:04,373 --> 01:02:05,641 Yep, all right. 1691 01:02:05,708 --> 01:02:07,209 So that's what he does at night, okay. 1692 01:02:18,254 --> 01:02:21,123 [gentle music] 1693 01:02:34,037 --> 01:02:35,504 [Q] Good boy. 1694 01:02:35,571 --> 01:02:37,874 Did you get the toys I sent? 1695 01:02:38,741 --> 01:02:39,742 Okay. 1696 01:02:39,809 --> 01:02:41,410 Oh, oh, Benjamin? 1697 01:02:41,477 --> 01:02:44,280 Okay, don't, don't hang up, don't hang up! 1698 01:02:44,982 --> 01:02:46,382 [cat meows] 1699 01:02:46,917 --> 01:02:48,051 He hung up. 1700 01:02:48,117 --> 01:02:50,087 Well, Brian Quinn misses his cats. 1701 01:02:50,152 --> 01:02:51,554 Your cats. I miss my family. 1702 01:02:51,621 --> 01:02:53,189 You know my daughter McKayla? 1703 01:02:53,255 --> 01:02:54,390 She rode her bike for the first time yesterday. 1704 01:02:54,457 --> 01:02:55,825 - [Q] Hmm. - Wasn't there. 1705 01:02:58,361 --> 01:03:00,563 - Milana? - Who's that? 1706 01:03:00,630 --> 01:03:03,066 Your daughter. 1707 01:03:03,132 --> 01:03:04,433 Her name's Milana. 1708 01:03:05,869 --> 01:03:07,370 Sweet Jesus. How long have we been gone? 1709 01:03:07,436 --> 01:03:09,572 - Three days. - What are we doing? 1710 01:03:09,639 --> 01:03:11,307 All right, we're four grown men. 1711 01:03:11,374 --> 01:03:12,842 We're out here jacking around, 1712 01:03:12,909 --> 01:03:14,443 trying to fix a mistake we made when we were kids. 1713 01:03:14,510 --> 01:03:16,646 - It's stupid. - Yeah, you know what? 1714 01:03:16,712 --> 01:03:18,581 Maybe we didn't think this one all the way through. 1715 01:03:18,648 --> 01:03:20,516 I've been getting phone numbers, girls. 1716 01:03:20,583 --> 01:03:22,318 Local girls that want to meet me. 1717 01:03:22,385 --> 01:03:23,285 But if you guys want to leave and go home, 1718 01:03:23,352 --> 01:03:24,420 I'm ready to go now. 1719 01:03:24,487 --> 01:03:26,389 - Yeah, yeah, me too. - I'll go. 1720 01:03:26,455 --> 01:03:27,790 Yeah, I gotta get back to what's-her-face, come on. 1721 01:03:27,858 --> 01:03:29,960 - All right. - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 1722 01:03:30,027 --> 01:03:31,094 We're almost there. 1723 01:03:31,160 --> 01:03:32,963 Sal, come on. Going home, bud. 1724 01:03:33,030 --> 01:03:33,964 - Come on, bud. - [Sal] No! 1725 01:03:34,031 --> 01:03:35,364 [dramatic music] 1726 01:03:35,431 --> 01:03:37,700 We're not going anywhere! 1727 01:03:37,767 --> 01:03:39,535 Sal, what are you doing? 1728 01:03:41,470 --> 01:03:43,006 We're gonna finish what we started. 1729 01:03:43,073 --> 01:03:44,640 He's gone loco. 1730 01:03:44,707 --> 01:03:48,111 I didn't come here all this way to turn around, to quit! 1731 01:03:48,177 --> 01:03:50,446 I'm not gonna go back home to Staten Island so they can say, 1732 01:03:50,513 --> 01:03:52,883 "You know that great guy, Sal Vulcano 1733 01:03:52,949 --> 01:03:55,518 and his friends that he has, they turned around. 1734 01:03:55,584 --> 01:03:59,522 They went all the way down to Georgia." 1735 01:04:00,857 --> 01:04:01,958 Not today, babies! 1736 01:04:02,025 --> 01:04:04,527 [breathing heavily] 1737 01:04:04,593 --> 01:04:06,796 - [Murr] Oh. - I did it. 1738 01:04:08,464 --> 01:04:10,232 Shut the fuck up. 1739 01:04:10,299 --> 01:04:11,600 It's fine, all right? We'll stay. 1740 01:04:11,667 --> 01:04:13,402 We'll keep going. Whatever you need, buddy. 1741 01:04:13,469 --> 01:04:15,072 We were just tired, got a little homesick. 1742 01:04:15,138 --> 01:04:16,873 Yeah. Put the board down. 1743 01:04:18,574 --> 01:04:20,843 Okay, great, 'cause as long as we come to an agreement, 1744 01:04:20,911 --> 01:04:22,278 'cause I just want to see Abdul. 1745 01:04:22,344 --> 01:04:23,846 - [Murr] Communicate. - Thank you guys. 1746 01:04:23,914 --> 01:04:25,214 All you had to do is say let's keep going, we'll go. 1747 01:04:25,281 --> 01:04:26,782 - I get emotional. - We'll do it. 1748 01:04:26,849 --> 01:04:28,919 You weren't really gonna hit us with that, were you? 1749 01:04:28,985 --> 01:04:30,153 For me, it's unclear. 1750 01:04:30,219 --> 01:04:32,889 [upbeat rock music] 1751 01:04:37,593 --> 01:04:39,963 I think this car breaks down on the side of most roads, 1752 01:04:40,030 --> 01:04:41,497 people are gonna stop and help. 1753 01:04:41,564 --> 01:04:43,066 - I agree. - Yeah, I think so. 1754 01:04:43,133 --> 01:04:44,667 I think they will stop to help, 1755 01:04:44,734 --> 01:04:46,970 but the question is, how long will they stick around? 1756 01:04:47,037 --> 01:04:49,906 - Until, until it gets weird. - Until it gets weird. 1757 01:04:49,973 --> 01:04:51,807 How weird should we make it, is the real question. 1758 01:04:51,875 --> 01:04:54,443 - Guys, did we just make plans? - I think we did. 1759 01:04:54,510 --> 01:04:56,245 - [laughter] - Pull over. 1760 01:04:56,312 --> 01:04:58,380 - We got some work to do. - You got it. 1761 01:05:00,549 --> 01:05:02,351 [Joe] Park it right here. Let's do it. 1762 01:05:06,990 --> 01:05:08,758 - [Joe] All right, here we go. - Here we go. 1763 01:05:08,824 --> 01:05:10,459 [Joe] Sal, you broke down, unfortunately, buddy. 1764 01:05:10,526 --> 01:05:12,095 Your object is to get people to stop you to help you. 1765 01:05:12,162 --> 01:05:14,497 Otherwise you're gonna be standing down on the grass 1766 01:05:14,563 --> 01:05:16,867 next to a car getting bit by mosquitoes. 1767 01:05:16,933 --> 01:05:19,368 All right, well, the quickest way to do this 1768 01:05:19,435 --> 01:05:20,904 is to just make them stop, right? 1769 01:05:20,971 --> 01:05:23,173 I'm proud of you, buddy. You're taking some initiative. 1770 01:05:23,240 --> 01:05:24,740 Whoo! 1771 01:05:25,641 --> 01:05:28,310 She's, uh, she's dead. 1772 01:05:28,377 --> 01:05:29,845 - [laughter] - Whoo. 1773 01:05:29,913 --> 01:05:32,581 She went down a couple miles back. 1774 01:05:36,153 --> 01:05:37,620 Hey, how you doing, man? 1775 01:05:37,686 --> 01:05:40,422 It's two guys, and I think they might want to kill me. 1776 01:05:40,489 --> 01:05:41,690 Here we go. 1777 01:05:41,757 --> 01:05:43,492 Can't do no harm, no foul. Bill. 1778 01:05:43,559 --> 01:05:44,861 Hey, how you doing, Bill? Sal. 1779 01:05:44,928 --> 01:05:46,529 - [laughter] - Yeah, my name's Sal. 1780 01:05:46,595 --> 01:05:47,964 - What's your name? - Mark. 1781 01:05:48,031 --> 01:05:49,431 Usually when something goes wrong, 1782 01:05:49,498 --> 01:05:50,800 I just blast something up the tailpipe. 1783 01:05:50,867 --> 01:05:53,536 [laughter] 1784 01:05:53,602 --> 01:05:54,770 Usually something goes wrong, I just 1785 01:05:54,837 --> 01:05:56,273 blast something up the tailpipe. 1786 01:05:56,338 --> 01:05:57,773 Up the tailpipe? 1787 01:05:57,840 --> 01:05:59,508 Well, I mean, first rule of thumb, right? 1788 01:05:59,575 --> 01:06:00,810 You get broke down, you gotta blast something 1789 01:06:00,877 --> 01:06:02,344 right up the tailpipe, and I was gonna 1790 01:06:02,411 --> 01:06:03,612 blast something, but I don't have nothing. 1791 01:06:03,679 --> 01:06:04,981 That's what I thought you did. 1792 01:06:05,048 --> 01:06:06,283 - No, no. - No. 1793 01:06:06,348 --> 01:06:08,584 [laughter] 1794 01:06:08,651 --> 01:06:10,586 [Joe] Guys, why isn't this fixed yet? 1795 01:06:10,653 --> 01:06:13,190 - [laughter] - [Q] Yeah, Sal... 1796 01:06:13,256 --> 01:06:14,690 I don't know, I don't even... 1797 01:06:14,757 --> 01:06:16,026 I wish I knew more about the thing. 1798 01:06:16,092 --> 01:06:17,793 Well, what's the issue? It's, I mean... 1799 01:06:17,861 --> 01:06:19,129 I mean, you can't fix it already or what's going on? 1800 01:06:19,196 --> 01:06:20,629 We don't know what it's doing. 1801 01:06:20,696 --> 01:06:22,498 I mean, you know, guys, you've been here 1802 01:06:22,565 --> 01:06:24,267 a couple minutes already, guys. 1803 01:06:24,333 --> 01:06:25,801 Tick-tock, Bill. 1804 01:06:25,869 --> 01:06:27,270 This is really nice of you guys, 'cause, you know, 1805 01:06:27,336 --> 01:06:28,737 I never would've stopped for you guys. 1806 01:06:31,274 --> 01:06:33,442 I mean, I gotta be honest, you fellas are top-notch. 1807 01:06:33,509 --> 01:06:34,610 It's... 1808 01:06:34,677 --> 01:06:36,012 Sal, you gonna say that line or no? 1809 01:06:36,079 --> 01:06:37,847 [Joe] Here we go, oh. 1810 01:06:37,914 --> 01:06:40,083 I wouldn't have stopped for you guys, so that's really nice. 1811 01:06:41,450 --> 01:06:42,853 There wouldn't be no use to stopping. 1812 01:06:42,919 --> 01:06:44,653 Yeah, right, right, right, right, right. 1813 01:06:44,720 --> 01:06:46,857 The only thing I could suggest if you guys were stuck, 1814 01:06:46,923 --> 01:06:48,859 you could blast something up your tailpipe, though. 1815 01:06:48,925 --> 01:06:49,993 [laughter] 1816 01:06:50,060 --> 01:06:51,760 All right, bud, head around to the trunk. 1817 01:06:51,827 --> 01:06:53,662 We've hidden something in there for him. 1818 01:06:53,729 --> 01:06:55,764 I think I got something here. Let me see. 1819 01:06:57,499 --> 01:06:59,702 - [gasps] - [laughter] 1820 01:07:01,670 --> 01:07:03,173 What the hell is that? 1821 01:07:03,240 --> 01:07:04,740 Okay. 1822 01:07:04,807 --> 01:07:06,142 [laughter] 1823 01:07:08,677 --> 01:07:10,247 Yeah, there's no string... 1824 01:07:10,313 --> 01:07:11,780 So, Sal, in the backseat, 1825 01:07:11,847 --> 01:07:12,916 we put a check for good Samaritans. 1826 01:07:12,983 --> 01:07:15,384 This is, guys... Mark, Bill... 1827 01:07:15,451 --> 01:07:16,920 This is the check 1828 01:07:18,088 --> 01:07:21,124 for good Samaritans who stopped 1829 01:07:21,191 --> 01:07:22,725 and pulled over to help me. 1830 01:07:22,791 --> 01:07:24,760 - [phone rings] - This is a check for 5... 1831 01:07:24,827 --> 01:07:27,097 Take that, Mark, go ahead. 1832 01:07:27,163 --> 01:07:28,397 [laughter] 1833 01:07:28,464 --> 01:07:29,698 Hello. 1834 01:07:29,765 --> 01:07:32,168 - Mark's still rocking a flip. - [laughs] 1835 01:07:32,235 --> 01:07:34,938 You took the call right in the middle of the check ceremony. 1836 01:07:35,005 --> 01:07:36,538 So anyway, guys, this is 1837 01:07:36,605 --> 01:07:38,141 from the Staten Island Credit Union, 1838 01:07:38,208 --> 01:07:39,775 this is a Good Samaritan check 1839 01:07:39,842 --> 01:07:41,311 for $5,000 1840 01:07:41,378 --> 01:07:42,745 for helping people in need. 1841 01:07:42,811 --> 01:07:44,047 - Ain't legal tender. - [Joe] Try to rip it. 1842 01:07:44,114 --> 01:07:45,614 You don't want it? 'Cause I'll... 1843 01:07:45,681 --> 01:07:47,683 Yeah, yeah, don't tear that, don't tear that. 1844 01:07:47,750 --> 01:07:49,551 - Oh. - [laughter] 1845 01:07:49,618 --> 01:07:51,087 Thank you. Bill, that's for you, man. 1846 01:07:51,154 --> 01:07:53,223 [bell dings] 1847 01:07:53,290 --> 01:07:55,325 [mellow harmonica music] 1848 01:07:55,392 --> 01:07:56,692 [Joe] Murr, you're walking funny. 1849 01:07:56,759 --> 01:07:58,094 Yeah, no kidding I'm walking funny, Joe. 1850 01:07:58,161 --> 01:07:59,561 Is it because of that thong we put on you? 1851 01:07:59,628 --> 01:08:00,829 What thong? This thong? 1852 01:08:00,897 --> 01:08:02,665 - There it is. - [laughter] 1853 01:08:03,333 --> 01:08:04,700 Dude, thank you. 1854 01:08:04,767 --> 01:08:06,403 What's your name, bud? What is it? I'm sorry. 1855 01:08:06,468 --> 01:08:07,670 - Dennis. - Dennis, I'm James. 1856 01:08:07,736 --> 01:08:09,005 I appreciate you stopping, Denise. 1857 01:08:09,072 --> 01:08:10,839 I appreciate you stopping... [laughs] 1858 01:08:10,907 --> 01:08:12,808 [laughter] 1859 01:08:12,876 --> 01:08:14,476 I appreciate you stopping, Denise. 1860 01:08:14,543 --> 01:08:16,079 I don't know the first thing. 1861 01:08:16,146 --> 01:08:17,813 Come around here, I'll show you what I noticed before. 1862 01:08:17,881 --> 01:08:20,317 I noticed that before it was smoking primarily from 1863 01:08:20,383 --> 01:08:21,450 from this area here. 1864 01:08:21,517 --> 01:08:22,618 I ain't got time for this, man. 1865 01:08:22,685 --> 01:08:24,187 - I don't even know. - No? 1866 01:08:24,254 --> 01:08:26,056 [laughter] 1867 01:08:27,891 --> 01:08:29,426 - [Q] Murr loses again. - Son of a bitch. 1868 01:08:29,491 --> 01:08:30,759 Did I just lose? 1869 01:08:30,826 --> 01:08:32,329 Did I just lose? A thong was his weakness? 1870 01:08:32,395 --> 01:08:34,530 - [Sal] Murr, you gotta go again. - Yeah. 1871 01:08:34,596 --> 01:08:36,799 What, is this like double or nothing? 1872 01:08:36,866 --> 01:08:38,935 Thank you so much, man. I appreciate it. 1873 01:08:39,002 --> 01:08:40,602 - James. Nice to meet you, bud. - Good to meet you, man. 1874 01:08:40,669 --> 01:08:42,038 Here's what happened, so I'm driving before. 1875 01:08:42,105 --> 01:08:44,341 But I don't even know what I'm looking at, bro. 1876 01:08:44,407 --> 01:08:45,774 Want to have a laugh? 1877 01:08:45,841 --> 01:08:47,576 Fake strangle me when the next car pulls by. 1878 01:08:47,643 --> 01:08:48,744 You want to have a little fun? Watch. 1879 01:08:48,811 --> 01:08:50,447 Okay, okay, okay, go. 1880 01:08:50,512 --> 01:08:52,248 When this guy pulls by, pretend you're strangling me, okay? 1881 01:08:52,315 --> 01:08:53,749 Gonna do it. 1882 01:08:53,816 --> 01:08:55,484 [Sal] Flail your arms. Flail your arms! 1883 01:08:55,551 --> 01:08:57,887 - Flail, your arms. - No, keep going. Don't stop now! 1884 01:08:57,954 --> 01:09:00,023 [laughter] 1885 01:09:02,959 --> 01:09:05,028 - [Sal] Dude! - [laughter] 1886 01:09:06,528 --> 01:09:07,596 - [laughs] - Nailed it. 1887 01:09:07,663 --> 01:09:09,698 Thanks, bud. That was awesome. 1888 01:09:09,765 --> 01:09:11,567 You know what, dude, I'm so glad that you pulled over. 1889 01:09:11,633 --> 01:09:13,069 I'm so glad you pulled over. 1890 01:09:13,136 --> 01:09:14,737 I was afraid it was gonna be a woman and then... 1891 01:09:14,803 --> 01:09:16,239 I was afraid... Nope, nope. 1892 01:09:16,306 --> 01:09:17,639 [laughter] 1893 01:09:17,706 --> 01:09:19,009 Nope, nope, nope. 1894 01:09:19,075 --> 01:09:20,243 [buzzer blares] 1895 01:09:20,310 --> 01:09:21,710 [mellow rock music] 1896 01:09:21,777 --> 01:09:23,679 [Joe] Car's a real lemon right now, buddy. 1897 01:09:23,746 --> 01:09:25,949 - There you go. - [vocalizing] 1898 01:09:26,016 --> 01:09:27,951 Oh, oh. 1899 01:09:28,018 --> 01:09:28,985 Oh, thank God. 1900 01:09:29,052 --> 01:09:30,519 Jump up and down you're so excited. 1901 01:09:30,586 --> 01:09:33,722 - Yeah, yeah. - Oh, yay. 1902 01:09:33,789 --> 01:09:35,225 Clap, clap, clap. 1903 01:09:35,291 --> 01:09:37,027 Yeah, yeah. 1904 01:09:37,093 --> 01:09:38,895 Turn around, do it in circles, do it in circles. 1905 01:09:38,962 --> 01:09:41,797 I have been waiting for somebody to pull over so long. 1906 01:09:41,865 --> 01:09:43,933 - [laughter] - Oh, yes! 1907 01:09:45,768 --> 01:09:47,404 Dude, thank you so much. 1908 01:09:47,470 --> 01:09:49,339 Yay. I love this car, man. 1909 01:09:49,406 --> 01:09:51,875 I've had this car for so long, and then I was riding, 1910 01:09:51,941 --> 01:09:53,510 I hit a bump, and then it just... 1911 01:09:53,609 --> 01:09:54,643 It just died. It won't go again. 1912 01:09:54,710 --> 01:09:56,046 You believe that? 1913 01:09:56,112 --> 01:09:57,813 The old [bleep]wagon's down for the count. 1914 01:09:57,881 --> 01:09:59,082 It's just dead, man. 1915 01:09:59,149 --> 01:10:00,316 The [bleep]wagon's down for the count. 1916 01:10:00,383 --> 01:10:02,485 - [laughter] - Yeah. 1917 01:10:02,551 --> 01:10:04,354 I lost my virginity in this car. 1918 01:10:04,421 --> 01:10:05,922 So did my older brother. 1919 01:10:05,989 --> 01:10:07,490 - So did my older brother. - [Sal] My younger brother. 1920 01:10:07,556 --> 01:10:09,259 - So did my younger brother. - [Sal] My sister did. 1921 01:10:09,325 --> 01:10:11,027 My sis, my sister did. 1922 01:10:11,094 --> 01:10:12,728 - It was a hell of a night. - [laughter] 1923 01:10:12,795 --> 01:10:13,997 It was a hell of a night. 1924 01:10:14,064 --> 01:10:15,831 It was, 1925 01:10:15,899 --> 01:10:16,832 it was a hell of a night. 1926 01:10:16,900 --> 01:10:19,135 - Yeah? - Yeah. Yeah. 1927 01:10:19,202 --> 01:10:20,736 You know what I got in the trunk? 1928 01:10:20,803 --> 01:10:22,038 Yeah, show him what you have in the trunk. 1929 01:10:24,340 --> 01:10:26,642 [Joe] Yeah, that's about a hundred pounds of cocaine, 1930 01:10:26,708 --> 01:10:28,278 and bags full of cash. 1931 01:10:28,344 --> 01:10:33,116 What we have here is about a hundred pounds of cocaine... 1932 01:10:33,183 --> 01:10:34,517 You're not DEA, are you? 1933 01:10:34,583 --> 01:10:36,186 You don't work for the fuzz, do you? 1934 01:10:36,252 --> 01:10:38,154 [chuckles] 1935 01:10:38,221 --> 01:10:39,422 I'll tell you what, bro. 1936 01:10:39,489 --> 01:10:40,957 - You didn't see nothing. - Put that back in the car. 1937 01:10:41,024 --> 01:10:41,991 Hurry up. Here comes a bus. 1938 01:10:42,058 --> 01:10:44,127 This is... A bus? Oh, shit. 1939 01:10:45,395 --> 01:10:47,897 Do you think anybody saw me? 1940 01:10:47,964 --> 01:10:49,466 Do you think they saw my face? 1941 01:10:49,532 --> 01:10:52,535 [laughter] 1942 01:10:52,601 --> 01:10:54,636 - You never saw me! - [bell dings] 1943 01:10:54,703 --> 01:10:57,840 [rock music] 1944 01:11:02,811 --> 01:11:06,648 [Joe] Guys, this is, this is a whole thing. 1945 01:11:06,715 --> 01:11:09,586 Joe, for no reason, stop traffic 1946 01:11:09,651 --> 01:11:11,254 and let cars go indiscriminately. 1947 01:11:11,321 --> 01:11:12,956 Let's stop a car. 1948 01:11:13,022 --> 01:11:14,690 He's gonna walk right into the road. 1949 01:11:16,159 --> 01:11:18,760 Okay, take it easy. I got 17 cars. 1950 01:11:18,827 --> 01:11:20,396 [laughter] 1951 01:11:20,463 --> 01:11:22,532 You're in. 1952 01:11:22,599 --> 01:11:23,732 Good. 1953 01:11:23,799 --> 01:11:25,667 Good, good, good. 1954 01:11:25,734 --> 01:11:28,138 [horn honks] Come on, come on. 1955 01:11:28,204 --> 01:11:29,838 [laughter] 1956 01:11:29,906 --> 01:11:31,307 Come on, come on, stop. 1957 01:11:34,244 --> 01:11:35,677 [laughter] 1958 01:11:35,744 --> 01:11:37,080 There you go. 1959 01:11:37,147 --> 01:11:38,647 Joe, both arms, windmill, opposite directions. 1960 01:11:38,714 --> 01:11:42,051 There you go. There you go. 1961 01:11:42,118 --> 01:11:44,053 Guys, nobody will stop to help me. 1962 01:11:44,120 --> 01:11:46,122 - [laughing] - What are you doing? 1963 01:11:46,189 --> 01:11:48,024 Okay, this guy just pulled over. 1964 01:11:51,628 --> 01:11:53,196 - Hi, I'm Joe. - Mitch. 1965 01:11:53,263 --> 01:11:55,098 Mitch, good to see you, pal. So the problem was I was... 1966 01:11:55,165 --> 01:11:56,798 I was driving down this road. 1967 01:11:56,866 --> 01:11:58,134 Keep him walking around the whole car. 1968 01:11:58,201 --> 01:12:00,069 And then when I saw it, I hit a bump. 1969 01:12:00,136 --> 01:12:01,803 And then I heard a da-dunk-dunk-dunk. 1970 01:12:01,871 --> 01:12:03,640 Come on. And a hit a buh-bump-bump. 1971 01:12:03,705 --> 01:12:06,209 And then when I hit it, I heard a jiggle-jiggle here. 1972 01:12:06,276 --> 01:12:07,243 There was a jiggle. 1973 01:12:07,310 --> 01:12:08,478 Take him around the whole car. 1974 01:12:08,545 --> 01:12:09,811 Then on the other side here... 1975 01:12:09,879 --> 01:12:11,548 Joe, I need, I need two full rotations. 1976 01:12:11,614 --> 01:12:12,982 This is here, this is one car. 1977 01:12:13,049 --> 01:12:14,551 - This is one. - Come on, take a walk with me. 1978 01:12:14,617 --> 01:12:16,920 So I saw back here that this wheel started to like, 1979 01:12:16,986 --> 01:12:18,820 if you look, like, this is on pretty good. 1980 01:12:18,888 --> 01:12:20,323 - Okay. - But the other one, 1981 01:12:20,390 --> 01:12:21,891 come on here, Mitch, let me show you real quick. 1982 01:12:21,958 --> 01:12:23,359 Oh, no, now you went the other way. Shit. 1983 01:12:23,426 --> 01:12:25,827 - He's undoing it, Joe! - You're undoing... 1984 01:12:25,895 --> 01:12:27,297 You're undoing the loop. No, you gotta come this way. 1985 01:12:27,363 --> 01:12:28,898 - [Murr] Yeah. - So now we're back on track. 1986 01:12:28,965 --> 01:12:30,832 So this will be a second rotation, yeah. 1987 01:12:30,900 --> 01:12:32,035 This hubcap is off. 1988 01:12:32,101 --> 01:12:33,870 The other side, the two came off. 1989 01:12:33,937 --> 01:12:36,039 - Okay. - This one here, hubcap. 1990 01:12:36,105 --> 01:12:37,540 So I got two hubcaps. So now... 1991 01:12:37,607 --> 01:12:39,708 I think I actually need three rotations, Joe. 1992 01:12:39,775 --> 01:12:41,611 Damn it. How many rotations? 1993 01:12:41,678 --> 01:12:42,979 You need one more. 1994 01:12:43,046 --> 01:12:44,414 What are you trying to accomplish here, Joe? 1995 01:12:44,480 --> 01:12:45,714 - Oh, me? - Yeah. 1996 01:12:45,781 --> 01:12:47,183 Oh, no, I'm trying to get the car to start. 1997 01:12:47,250 --> 01:12:48,318 But I walked you through what happened, come here. 1998 01:12:48,384 --> 01:12:49,552 Mitch, Mitch... 1999 01:12:49,619 --> 01:12:51,321 You gotta look at this, Mitch. Mitch, Mitch! 2000 01:12:51,387 --> 01:12:53,456 - Hold on, hold on. - Joe, start hiding from him. 2001 01:12:53,523 --> 01:12:55,124 But I don't need... 2002 01:12:55,191 --> 01:12:56,559 [Sal] Joe, he's not gonna chase you. 2003 01:12:56,626 --> 01:12:57,961 - Come on, Joe! - Hey, man, 2004 01:12:58,027 --> 01:13:00,563 you're gonna make me leave you, man, okay? 2005 01:13:00,630 --> 01:13:02,865 - Hey, man, I'm gone, man. - No, no, Mitch, look at this! 2006 01:13:02,932 --> 01:13:05,335 - No. - [laughter] 2007 01:13:05,401 --> 01:13:07,136 Mitch, but look, you gotta look at this last one. 2008 01:13:07,203 --> 01:13:08,638 - Come here. - Mitch. 2009 01:13:08,705 --> 01:13:10,006 Mitch, you're my best friend. 2010 01:13:10,073 --> 01:13:12,041 We're best friends, Mitch. Mitch. 2011 01:13:12,108 --> 01:13:13,809 All I'm trying to do is help you. 2012 01:13:13,876 --> 01:13:15,144 - [Mitch] I know, I'm trying... - [Joe] You want to help me, 2013 01:13:15,211 --> 01:13:16,613 go around the car one more time! 2014 01:13:16,679 --> 01:13:17,614 - One more time. - Okay? 2015 01:13:17,680 --> 01:13:18,881 - Guess what. - What? 2016 01:13:18,948 --> 01:13:20,650 - You gotta follow me. - Okay. Deal. 2017 01:13:20,717 --> 01:13:22,485 I'm following you, Mitch. 2018 01:13:22,552 --> 01:13:23,785 - Joe... - It's okay. 2019 01:13:23,853 --> 01:13:25,388 Joe, after this, I'm going home. 2020 01:13:25,455 --> 01:13:27,290 Okay, you accomplished your goal. 2021 01:13:27,357 --> 01:13:29,158 I did. I did accomplish my goal. 2022 01:13:29,225 --> 01:13:30,660 - And you have a good day. - That's it. 2023 01:13:30,727 --> 01:13:32,662 Mitch, you're unbelievable, buddy. 2024 01:13:32,729 --> 01:13:33,863 Thank you so much. 2025 01:13:33,930 --> 01:13:35,398 That's how you hit home runs. 2026 01:13:35,465 --> 01:13:36,699 Great work, boys. 2027 01:13:36,765 --> 01:13:38,534 [rock music] 2028 01:13:43,473 --> 01:13:45,908 [Q] Lovely Florida. Oh, what do we have here? 2029 01:13:45,975 --> 01:13:47,277 Check it out. 2030 01:13:47,343 --> 01:13:50,146 - [cheers and applause] - Murr's our loser! 2031 01:13:50,213 --> 01:13:51,581 Oh! 2032 01:13:51,648 --> 01:13:53,483 [Q] Murr is forever our loser. 2033 01:13:53,549 --> 01:13:55,218 No Abdul for you, baby. 2034 01:13:55,285 --> 01:13:57,819 ♪ She gon' make you Move to Miami ♪ 2035 01:13:57,887 --> 01:14:00,023 ♪ She moving like a gypsy ♪ 2036 01:14:00,089 --> 01:14:01,491 ♪ Her body got me tipsy ♪ 2037 01:14:01,557 --> 01:14:03,092 - Look at this! - We have arrived. 2038 01:14:03,159 --> 01:14:05,794 Oh, look at this. 2039 01:14:05,862 --> 01:14:08,064 ♪ Girl got me Feeling risky ♪ 2040 01:14:08,131 --> 01:14:11,100 [overlapping chatter] 2041 01:14:11,167 --> 01:14:13,369 Welcome to Miami, gentlemen. Checking in? 2042 01:14:13,436 --> 01:14:15,338 You bet your sweet ass we're checking in, 2043 01:14:15,405 --> 01:14:17,373 you bedroom-eyed baby bitch, just kidding. 2044 01:14:17,440 --> 01:14:19,676 - We need help with luggage? - We straight! 2045 01:14:19,742 --> 01:14:20,842 All good here, dawg. 2046 01:14:20,910 --> 01:14:23,413 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 2047 01:14:23,479 --> 01:14:25,682 Door! 2048 01:14:25,748 --> 01:14:27,784 Hey, watch the leather. [chuckles] 2049 01:14:27,849 --> 01:14:29,719 Good joke. 2050 01:14:29,786 --> 01:14:31,187 ♪ We gon' party ♪ 2051 01:14:31,254 --> 01:14:32,989 ♪ Freaking every weekend ♪ 2052 01:14:33,056 --> 01:14:35,925 ♪ Baby, we just getting started ♪ 2053 01:14:35,992 --> 01:14:39,962 [singing in Spanish] 2054 01:14:41,164 --> 01:14:42,565 ♪ Damn, you got me, girl ♪ 2055 01:14:42,632 --> 01:14:45,301 ♪ That body's built Like a Bugatti ♪ 2056 01:14:45,368 --> 01:14:47,503 ♪ And if you look, You'll fall in love ♪ 2057 01:14:47,570 --> 01:14:49,939 ♪ She got that ass, She make... ♪ 2058 01:14:50,006 --> 01:14:52,375 It's always... 2059 01:14:52,442 --> 01:14:53,943 I gotta go back down! [sighs] 2060 01:15:02,185 --> 01:15:03,786 ♪ She gon' make you move to Miami ♪ 2061 01:15:03,853 --> 01:15:05,655 - VIPs. - What do you think? 2062 01:15:05,722 --> 01:15:06,989 What do you think? VIP! 2063 01:15:07,056 --> 01:15:08,891 Stands for "Very Important Man." 2064 01:15:08,958 --> 01:15:10,626 - Abdul! - Get to the party. 2065 01:15:10,693 --> 01:15:12,095 Abdul! 2066 01:15:14,464 --> 01:15:17,667 [all chanting] Abdul! Abdul! Abdul! 2067 01:15:17,734 --> 01:15:19,135 [cheering] 2068 01:15:19,202 --> 01:15:21,304 Abdul! Abdul! Abdul! 2069 01:15:21,371 --> 01:15:22,939 [somber music] 2070 01:15:28,144 --> 01:15:29,846 Wow, look at this place, huh? 2071 01:15:29,912 --> 01:15:32,281 Whoa. Oh, yeah. 2072 01:15:32,348 --> 01:15:33,783 Door. 2073 01:15:33,851 --> 01:15:36,319 - This is crazy. - Wow. Check it. 2074 01:15:36,386 --> 01:15:38,154 Yeah, but we made it, boys. 2075 01:15:38,221 --> 01:15:39,722 It's us, settle down. Everybody settle down. 2076 01:15:39,789 --> 01:15:41,791 [laughter on television] 2077 01:15:41,859 --> 01:15:43,359 - You have a finger... - Very good, all right. 2078 01:15:43,426 --> 01:15:46,329 ...in your ass [bleep] on television! 2079 01:15:46,396 --> 01:15:48,431 - There you go. - [laughter] 2080 01:15:49,732 --> 01:15:50,700 [upbeat music] 2081 01:15:50,767 --> 01:15:52,935 This is so nice. 2082 01:15:53,002 --> 01:15:54,570 - Paula. - Hey, Paula. 2083 01:15:54,637 --> 01:15:56,906 Hey, guys, how are you? You made it. 2084 01:15:56,973 --> 01:15:58,441 - Where's Murr? - Who he? 2085 01:15:58,508 --> 01:16:00,710 Oh, it turns out there was only three tickets. 2086 01:16:00,777 --> 01:16:03,379 So we decided to compete in a hidden camera challenge... 2087 01:16:03,446 --> 01:16:04,514 [laughs] 2088 01:16:05,782 --> 01:16:07,950 You guys are hysterical. [laughs] 2089 01:16:10,720 --> 01:16:12,221 Okay. 2090 01:16:15,158 --> 01:16:18,795 - Well, there's our table. - She thinks I'm hysterical. 2091 01:16:18,862 --> 01:16:19,996 - That's nice. - You are funny. 2092 01:16:20,062 --> 01:16:22,665 ♪ Baby, pick your head up ♪ 2093 01:16:22,732 --> 01:16:27,470 ♪ Come on and look me In the face ♪ 2094 01:16:27,537 --> 01:16:30,406 ♪ 'Cause I can tell That something ♪ 2095 01:16:30,473 --> 01:16:34,210 ♪ Is bringing you down ♪ 2096 01:16:34,277 --> 01:16:36,679 ♪ Is it the rumor ♪ 2097 01:16:36,746 --> 01:16:39,081 ♪ That another boy ♪ 2098 01:16:39,148 --> 01:16:42,752 ♪ Wants to take your place ♪ 2099 01:16:42,819 --> 01:16:46,022 ♪ Have you been Hearing the stories ♪ 2100 01:16:46,088 --> 01:16:48,491 ♪ They're going around ♪ 2101 01:16:48,558 --> 01:16:49,725 So funny. 2102 01:16:49,792 --> 01:16:52,261 That looks like Murr from Impractical Jokers. 2103 01:16:52,328 --> 01:16:54,330 No way. He looks too sad and lonely. 2104 01:16:54,397 --> 01:16:56,065 Yeah, and they're never seen alone. 2105 01:16:56,132 --> 01:16:57,433 - They're tight like that. - Yeah. 2106 01:16:57,500 --> 01:17:00,102 So anyways, like I was saying, she... 2107 01:17:00,169 --> 01:17:01,771 ♪ The moon And the stars above ♪ 2108 01:17:01,838 --> 01:17:03,773 Okay, so when you're making a balsamic reduction, 2109 01:17:03,840 --> 01:17:05,842 you really want to have the flame at a nice simmer. 2110 01:17:05,909 --> 01:17:07,543 If the heat is too hot, it's not gonna reduce 2111 01:17:07,610 --> 01:17:09,145 the way you want it, and the most important part 2112 01:17:09,212 --> 01:17:11,247 is to put the drizzle right when it's hot. 2113 01:17:11,314 --> 01:17:13,549 And that's chicken, salads, fish dishes, whatever? 2114 01:17:13,616 --> 01:17:15,785 Any dish. It's about the presentaish. 2115 01:17:15,853 --> 01:17:17,687 [somber piano music] 2116 01:17:26,562 --> 01:17:28,664 [uplifting music] 2117 01:17:37,773 --> 01:17:39,408 [grunting] 2118 01:17:50,988 --> 01:17:54,123 [dance music playing] 2119 01:17:59,762 --> 01:18:01,063 What are you doing? 2120 01:18:01,130 --> 01:18:02,665 Kinda getting back into it a little bit. 2121 01:18:02,732 --> 01:18:03,799 It looks like you're hurt. 2122 01:18:03,867 --> 01:18:05,501 Nah, I feel great. 2123 01:18:05,568 --> 01:18:08,204 - That does not look like you think it looks, buddy. - Yeah. 2124 01:18:08,271 --> 01:18:10,072 I don't know if I agree with you. 2125 01:18:10,139 --> 01:18:12,742 Everyone here agrees with us. 2126 01:18:13,676 --> 01:18:15,077 All right, all right. 2127 01:18:15,144 --> 01:18:16,479 All right, we need Murray back, 2128 01:18:16,546 --> 01:18:18,147 'cause we're starting to turn on each other. 2129 01:18:18,214 --> 01:18:19,448 You know, it just doesn't feel right without Murr. 2130 01:18:19,515 --> 01:18:21,150 Because he's not here, I'll admit it. 2131 01:18:21,217 --> 01:18:22,451 I miss him a little. 2132 01:18:22,518 --> 01:18:24,287 What are we even still doing here? 2133 01:18:24,353 --> 01:18:25,788 We accomplished what we set out to do. 2134 01:18:25,856 --> 01:18:28,257 We didn't mess up the night. I'm not having fun. 2135 01:18:28,324 --> 01:18:30,593 We're nowhere near Paula anyway. 2136 01:18:30,660 --> 01:18:33,329 Why don't we make like a tree and go make fun of Murray? 2137 01:18:33,396 --> 01:18:35,231 - Yeah. - All right. 2138 01:18:37,533 --> 01:18:38,668 [gasps] 2139 01:18:38,734 --> 01:18:40,536 [triumphant fanfare] 2140 01:18:43,139 --> 01:18:46,208 Look at this vanilla angel. 2141 01:18:47,044 --> 01:18:48,544 He's magnificent. 2142 01:18:48,611 --> 01:18:50,513 You glorious, luminous ferret. 2143 01:18:50,580 --> 01:18:52,848 I made the cut. I made the cut. 2144 01:18:52,916 --> 01:18:54,617 I'm in, boys. 2145 01:18:54,684 --> 01:18:56,752 You just had to come, didn't you? 2146 01:18:56,819 --> 01:18:58,421 The unmitigated gall, bro. 2147 01:18:58,487 --> 01:19:00,356 I mean, you lost and you show up? 2148 01:19:00,423 --> 01:19:02,124 - What about the rules? - Yeah, I mean... 2149 01:19:02,191 --> 01:19:04,126 we're gonna pass Go and collect $200? 2150 01:19:04,193 --> 01:19:05,328 We're breaking rules? 2151 01:19:05,394 --> 01:19:06,729 I'm not playing Monopoly like that! 2152 01:19:06,796 --> 01:19:08,031 Really? 2153 01:19:08,097 --> 01:19:09,565 I thought you guys would be realizing 2154 01:19:09,632 --> 01:19:11,133 that the four of us are better together. 2155 01:19:11,200 --> 01:19:13,971 This place is thebomb.com. 2156 01:19:14,037 --> 01:19:15,605 There's Paula Abdul. 2157 01:19:15,671 --> 01:19:16,606 Paula! 2158 01:19:16,672 --> 01:19:19,108 - Right, she's right there. - Hi. 2159 01:19:21,510 --> 01:19:23,279 She's clocking us in a weird way. 2160 01:19:23,346 --> 01:19:26,382 [dramatic music] 2161 01:19:28,351 --> 01:19:29,452 [alarm blares] 2162 01:19:29,518 --> 01:19:31,855 - It's them. - You bald idiot. 2163 01:19:31,922 --> 01:19:33,155 You wore the jacket. 2164 01:19:33,222 --> 01:19:35,424 It's them. 2165 01:19:35,491 --> 01:19:37,894 She's put it all together. We gotta get out of here. 2166 01:19:37,961 --> 01:19:39,029 Run! 2167 01:19:39,096 --> 01:19:40,864 My throat! 2168 01:19:44,667 --> 01:19:46,702 [laughs] Suck it, Abdul! 2169 01:19:46,769 --> 01:19:47,803 - Yeah! - Whoa! 2170 01:19:47,871 --> 01:19:49,072 [laughs] 2171 01:19:49,138 --> 01:19:50,439 - Hey, baby! - [taser crackles] 2172 01:19:50,506 --> 01:19:52,241 [crowd gasps, murmurs] 2173 01:19:53,209 --> 01:19:54,377 - Sal! - His throat! 2174 01:19:54,443 --> 01:19:57,613 - My beautiful boy. - Buddy, buddy. 2175 01:19:57,680 --> 01:20:00,216 - Take 'em out back. - Who are you? 2176 01:20:00,282 --> 01:20:01,651 I run this town. 2177 01:20:01,717 --> 01:20:04,754 Not the cartel. Not the Yakuza. 2178 01:20:04,820 --> 01:20:05,889 Abdul. 2179 01:20:05,956 --> 01:20:07,924 You're evil. And you, you're a monster. 2180 01:20:07,991 --> 01:20:10,726 You know, I'm gonna make you forever my bitch! 2181 01:20:10,793 --> 01:20:12,528 [light dramatic music] 2182 01:20:14,965 --> 01:20:16,967 No! 2183 01:20:17,034 --> 01:20:19,201 [screams] 2184 01:20:22,039 --> 01:20:23,739 [Q] And this is where our story should end. 2185 01:20:23,806 --> 01:20:25,942 I mean, we really screwed the night up. 2186 01:20:26,009 --> 01:20:28,611 My sweet, sweet Sal was tased. 2187 01:20:28,678 --> 01:20:30,881 I'm saving him like a real man, sure, 2188 01:20:30,947 --> 01:20:33,150 but Murr is screaming like a little ferret. 2189 01:20:33,215 --> 01:20:34,583 Paula's good and pissed. 2190 01:20:34,650 --> 01:20:37,186 And Joe... Wait, where is Joe? 2191 01:20:37,253 --> 01:20:39,422 - Hey, Paula. - [feedback drones] 2192 01:20:39,488 --> 01:20:41,992 I mean, I came here to party, right? 2193 01:20:42,059 --> 01:20:43,325 [cheering] 2194 01:20:43,392 --> 01:20:45,996 I got this, boys. 2195 01:20:46,063 --> 01:20:47,898 ♪ Make money, money, Make money, money ♪ 2196 01:20:47,964 --> 01:20:50,067 ♪ Make money, money, Make money, money, hey ♪ 2197 01:20:50,133 --> 01:20:52,035 ♪ Take money, money, Take money, money ♪ 2198 01:20:52,102 --> 01:20:53,970 ♪ Take money, money, Take money, money, hey ♪ 2199 01:20:54,037 --> 01:20:56,305 ♪ Save money, money, Save money, money, money ♪ 2200 01:20:56,372 --> 01:20:58,507 ♪ Save money, money, save money, money, money ♪ 2201 01:20:58,574 --> 01:21:00,509 ♪ 401(k), 401(k) ♪ 2202 01:21:00,576 --> 01:21:02,745 ♪ 401(k), 401(k) ♪ 2203 01:21:02,812 --> 01:21:03,779 DJ, flip it. 2204 01:21:03,846 --> 01:21:06,116 Paula, get your Abdul ass up here. 2205 01:21:06,183 --> 01:21:07,951 ["Forever Your Girl" plays] 2206 01:21:11,220 --> 01:21:13,456 - ♪ Hey, baby ♪ - Oh, oh! 2207 01:21:13,522 --> 01:21:16,392 - ♪ You gotta remember ♪ - I remember. 2208 01:21:16,459 --> 01:21:17,961 ♪ I'm forever your girl ♪ 2209 01:21:18,028 --> 01:21:20,496 - For how long? - ♪ Baby, forever ♪ 2210 01:21:20,563 --> 01:21:24,233 ♪ And ever and ever, You know I am ♪ 2211 01:21:24,300 --> 01:21:25,634 Yeah, let's do it! 2212 01:21:25,701 --> 01:21:28,972 Give it up for Joe and the Impractical Jokers. 2213 01:21:29,039 --> 01:21:30,239 They're in the house, 2214 01:21:30,306 --> 01:21:32,508 and they drove the whole way here. 2215 01:21:34,276 --> 01:21:35,644 She forgives us! 2216 01:21:41,617 --> 01:21:43,586 ♪ Baby, pick your head up ♪ 2217 01:21:43,652 --> 01:21:45,122 Pick your head up. Pick your head up. 2218 01:21:45,188 --> 01:21:49,492 ♪ Come on And look me in the face ♪ 2219 01:21:49,558 --> 01:21:51,995 ♪ 'Cause I can tell That something ♪ 2220 01:21:52,062 --> 01:21:54,131 - What? - ♪ Is bringing you down ♪ 2221 01:21:54,197 --> 01:21:56,432 Paula Abdul! 2222 01:21:56,499 --> 01:21:58,034 You did it! 2223 01:21:58,101 --> 01:22:01,138 ♪ Baby, just remember, I gave you my heart ♪ 2224 01:22:01,204 --> 01:22:02,671 Tell me! 2225 01:22:02,738 --> 01:22:05,208 ♪ Ain't no one Gonna tear us apart ♪ 2226 01:22:05,274 --> 01:22:07,643 - ♪ He can promise the moon ♪ - Hands in the air! 2227 01:22:07,710 --> 01:22:09,946 ♪ And the stars above ♪ 2228 01:22:10,013 --> 01:22:13,950 ♪ Even if he promised me The world ♪ 2229 01:22:14,017 --> 01:22:15,085 [alarm blares] 2230 01:22:15,152 --> 01:22:18,021 [gentle acoustic strumming] 2231 01:22:20,756 --> 01:22:23,626 - Wow, I love Miami. - [laughter] 2232 01:22:23,692 --> 01:22:25,561 What a night. What a night! 2233 01:22:25,628 --> 01:22:27,130 - Yes! - Unbelievable. 2234 01:22:27,197 --> 01:22:30,066 Man, I'm so glad I threatened your lives with that 2x4. 2235 01:22:30,133 --> 01:22:31,201 [laughter] 2236 01:22:31,268 --> 01:22:33,136 - Fellas, I love you. - Yeah. 2237 01:22:33,203 --> 01:22:34,204 You're my best friends. 2238 01:22:34,271 --> 01:22:35,872 Epic, epic night, guys. 2239 01:22:35,939 --> 01:22:39,809 Yeah, I don't say this enough, but I... I... 2240 01:22:39,876 --> 01:22:42,078 Hey, Fatone, you mind keeping it down back there? 2241 01:22:42,145 --> 01:22:44,547 - We're trying to have a moment. - Sorry. 2242 01:22:44,613 --> 01:22:46,682 I thought I had known everything 2243 01:22:46,749 --> 01:22:48,051 there was to know about us, 2244 01:22:48,118 --> 01:22:49,618 but I learned a few things on this trip. 2245 01:22:49,685 --> 01:22:51,353 - Sal loves tigers. - [laughs] 2246 01:22:51,420 --> 01:22:54,723 Yeah, Murr loves going to strip clubs with his young nieces. 2247 01:22:54,790 --> 01:22:56,725 Q's parents love softcore porn. 2248 01:22:56,792 --> 01:22:58,295 - No, no, they do not. - They do. 2249 01:22:58,360 --> 01:22:59,963 - They do not. They do not. - They do, they produce it. 2250 01:23:00,030 --> 01:23:01,764 I'll tell you what the biggest thing, though, 2251 01:23:01,831 --> 01:23:03,399 that surprised me was how good of a hype man 2252 01:23:03,465 --> 01:23:05,467 - Joe turned out to be after all. - Right? 2253 01:23:05,534 --> 01:23:08,470 - Not bad, buddy. - [mouths word] 2254 01:23:08,537 --> 01:23:10,974 I should talk to you boys about something. 2255 01:23:11,041 --> 01:23:12,541 An offer came in. 2256 01:23:12,608 --> 01:23:14,376 Abdul wants me to go full-time as her hype man. 2257 01:23:14,443 --> 01:23:16,545 World tour. Unbelievable. 2258 01:23:16,612 --> 01:23:19,415 Seven-figure salary, 401(k), full benefits. 2259 01:23:19,481 --> 01:23:21,617 Everything. 2260 01:23:21,684 --> 01:23:24,653 You know, she even offered me my own reality show. 2261 01:23:24,720 --> 01:23:27,356 "Believe the Hype: The Joe Gatto Story." 2262 01:23:27,423 --> 01:23:29,425 I got a tricycle for McKayla. 2263 01:23:29,491 --> 01:23:30,659 Milana. 2264 01:23:30,726 --> 01:23:32,828 My own helicopter they're flying in. 2265 01:23:34,097 --> 01:23:35,631 She's gonna get rid of that tapeworm. 2266 01:23:35,698 --> 01:23:37,499 Oh, you've had that for years. 2267 01:23:37,566 --> 01:23:38,869 Bye-bye, Charlie. 2268 01:23:38,935 --> 01:23:41,837 Everything I ever wanted as a full-blown hype man 2269 01:23:41,905 --> 01:23:43,606 delivered on a silver platter. 2270 01:23:43,672 --> 01:23:45,175 Well, what did you say to her? 2271 01:23:45,242 --> 01:23:47,676 [triumphant music] 2272 01:23:49,346 --> 01:23:50,881 - I said no. - Oh, thank God! 2273 01:23:50,947 --> 01:23:52,249 I don't want to do it. She said, "What are you doing?" 2274 01:23:52,315 --> 01:23:53,316 I said, "I'm forever their boy." 2275 01:23:53,382 --> 01:23:55,051 I straight up told her no-no. 2276 01:23:55,118 --> 01:23:56,152 You know what? 2277 01:23:57,386 --> 01:23:59,155 It's time to go back to Staten Island. 2278 01:23:59,222 --> 01:24:00,456 Yes, it is. 2279 01:24:00,522 --> 01:24:01,858 Let me just go gas up Grandma Lucia. 2280 01:24:01,925 --> 01:24:03,626 - We'll hit the road. - Hold on, fellas. 2281 01:24:03,692 --> 01:24:07,463 Abdul texted me tickets to go on her private plane. 2282 01:24:07,529 --> 01:24:08,797 - Oh, all right. - Oh! 2283 01:24:08,865 --> 01:24:10,466 - That's awesome. - Wait, wait, wait. 2284 01:24:10,532 --> 01:24:12,869 She sent three tickets. Come on! 2285 01:24:12,936 --> 01:24:14,503 - [laughter] - Is she kidding me? 2286 01:24:14,570 --> 01:24:15,804 - And it goes on. - This is on purpose, right? 2287 01:24:15,872 --> 01:24:17,908 - Does she watch the show? - Oh, that's great. 2288 01:24:17,974 --> 01:24:19,376 Well, there's four of us. That's an issue. 2289 01:24:19,441 --> 01:24:20,409 Well, then how are we gonna decide 2290 01:24:20,476 --> 01:24:21,912 who gets to go on the plane? 2291 01:24:21,978 --> 01:24:23,746 - I think it's been decided. - Yeah, pretty sure. 2292 01:24:23,812 --> 01:24:25,248 - What do you mean? - [Joe] Did you not watch the movie? 2293 01:24:25,315 --> 01:24:27,117 - [Murr] That's for real, like... - [Joe] Yes. 2294 01:24:27,183 --> 01:24:29,585 - [Sal] Yes, our show is real. - [Murr] But that's for real? 2295 01:24:29,652 --> 01:24:31,420 [Sal] You think you have a shot at a private? 2296 01:24:31,487 --> 01:24:33,189 Don't worry, we'll... 2297 01:24:33,256 --> 01:24:34,991 ♪ The stars above ♪ 2298 01:24:35,058 --> 01:24:40,796 ♪ Even if he promised me The world ♪ 2299 01:24:40,864 --> 01:24:44,733 ♪ Just remember I'm forever your girl ♪ 2300 01:24:45,768 --> 01:24:47,569 Is that it? Is that the plane? 2301 01:24:47,636 --> 01:24:49,838 Oh, my God, guys. We are living life. 2302 01:24:49,906 --> 01:24:51,774 - That's a jet. - Yeah. 2303 01:24:51,840 --> 01:24:54,476 All right, all right. 2304 01:24:54,543 --> 01:24:56,146 So I really can't fly in the jet? 2305 01:24:56,212 --> 01:24:57,981 Come on. 2306 01:24:58,048 --> 01:25:00,216 What about if I drive Grandma Lucia home? 2307 01:25:00,283 --> 01:25:02,718 Grandma Lucia's already halfway back to Staten Island, buddy. 2308 01:25:02,785 --> 01:25:05,288 We're in this. You're on that. 2309 01:25:05,355 --> 01:25:07,790 [mellow rock music] 2310 01:25:10,026 --> 01:25:11,428 Oh, God. 2311 01:25:11,493 --> 01:25:13,529 See you in Staten Island. 2312 01:25:13,595 --> 01:25:15,432 - Welcome. - Thank you. 2313 01:25:15,497 --> 01:25:17,067 Wait, on? 2314 01:25:26,675 --> 01:25:29,279 - All right, huh? - Oh, yeah. 2315 01:25:29,346 --> 01:25:31,181 - Cheers. - Cheers! 2316 01:25:31,247 --> 01:25:32,349 Yes! 2317 01:25:32,415 --> 01:25:34,683 Private plane, Abdul, no Murray. 2318 01:25:34,750 --> 01:25:37,519 - This is crazy, man. - Mmm. 2319 01:25:38,922 --> 01:25:40,991 How do you think he's doing? 2320 01:25:41,057 --> 01:25:42,725 [yelling] 2321 01:25:42,791 --> 01:25:44,394 [Wolfmother's "Joker and the Thief" playing] 2322 01:25:44,461 --> 01:25:46,829 ♪ I said the joker Is a wanted man ♪ 2323 01:25:46,896 --> 01:25:49,966 ♪ He makes his way All across the land ♪ 2324 01:25:50,033 --> 01:25:52,936 ♪ See him sifting Through the sand ♪ 2325 01:25:53,003 --> 01:25:54,837 ♪ So I'll tell you All the story ♪ 2326 01:25:54,904 --> 01:25:57,273 ♪ 'Bout the joker And the thief in the night ♪ 2327 01:26:02,644 --> 01:26:05,348 ♪ He's always laughing In the midst of power ♪ 2328 01:26:05,415 --> 01:26:08,784 ♪ Always living In the final hour ♪ 2329 01:26:08,852 --> 01:26:11,454 ♪ There is always Sweet in the sour ♪ 2330 01:26:11,520 --> 01:26:15,959 ♪ So we are not going home ♪ 2331 01:26:16,792 --> 01:26:18,261 [Murr] Oh, God! 2332 01:26:19,095 --> 01:26:20,763 [yelling] 2333 01:26:20,829 --> 01:26:25,201 ♪ Can you see the joker Flying over ♪ 2334 01:26:25,268 --> 01:26:26,870 [yells] 2335 01:26:26,936 --> 01:26:31,673 ♪ As she's standing In the field of clover ♪ 2336 01:26:33,510 --> 01:26:36,312 ♪ Watching out every day ♪ 2337 01:26:36,379 --> 01:26:38,781 ♪ I wonder what would happen If he took her away ♪ 2338 01:26:38,847 --> 01:26:40,549 ♪ I'll tell you All the story ♪ 2339 01:26:40,616 --> 01:26:42,718 ♪ 'Bout the joker And the thief in the night ♪ 2340 01:26:43,253 --> 01:26:45,621 [yelling] 2341 01:26:45,687 --> 01:26:48,824 [light dramatic music] 2342 01:26:48,891 --> 01:26:53,891 Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org 2343 01:30:03,186 --> 01:30:05,922 ♪ Time's up, time's up, Time's up, time's up ♪ 2344 01:30:05,989 --> 01:30:07,423 ♪ Time to knock this shit up ♪ 2345 01:30:07,490 --> 01:30:10,526 ♪ I'm a joker, Impractically nuts ♪ 2346 01:30:10,593 --> 01:30:14,163 ♪ With my crew, About to light this shit up ♪ 2347 01:30:14,230 --> 01:30:16,966 ♪ I'm a joker, Impractically nuts ♪ 2348 01:30:17,033 --> 01:30:18,935 ♪ Impractical, impractical ♪ 2349 01:30:19,002 --> 01:30:20,136 ♪ Joker ♪ 2350 01:30:20,203 --> 01:30:22,838 ♪ Impractical, impractical ♪ 2351 01:30:22,905 --> 01:30:24,240 ♪ Joker ♪ 2352 01:30:24,307 --> 01:30:26,409 ♪ Impractical, impractical ♪ 2353 01:30:26,476 --> 01:30:27,710 ♪ Joker ♪ 2354 01:30:27,776 --> 01:30:29,345 ♪ Impractical, impractical ♪ 2355 01:30:29,412 --> 01:30:31,714 ♪ Joker, We pull up in the Crown Vic ♪ 2356 01:30:31,780 --> 01:30:33,349 ♪ We 'bout to clown and shit ♪ 2357 01:30:33,416 --> 01:30:35,285 ♪ We ate some brownies At the crib ♪ 2358 01:30:35,351 --> 01:30:37,620 ♪ We prank and trick, Straight fooling ♪ 2359 01:30:37,687 --> 01:30:39,689 ♪ Me and my crew's In this bitch ♪ 2360 01:30:39,756 --> 01:30:42,392 ♪ Just coolin', Me and my dudes, ice pick ♪ 2361 01:30:42,458 --> 01:30:44,394 ♪ When you see us coming, We stunting ♪ 2362 01:30:44,460 --> 01:30:46,429 ♪ Now run and tell that, The boys ♪ 2363 01:30:46,496 --> 01:30:48,665 ♪ Are hunting, they gunning, With nothing held back ♪ 2364 01:30:48,731 --> 01:30:50,799 ♪ You lose at this game, You get punished ♪ 2365 01:30:50,867 --> 01:30:52,468 ♪ And that's a real fact ♪ 2366 01:30:52,535 --> 01:30:53,936 ♪ You planning on staying, I'll be honest ♪ 2367 01:30:54,003 --> 01:30:55,638 ♪ We all... ♪ 2368 01:30:55,705 --> 01:30:57,106 ♪ Sal, Murr, Joe, Q ♪ 2369 01:30:57,173 --> 01:30:58,775 ♪ We all about the laughs ♪ [laughs] 2370 01:30:58,840 --> 01:31:00,842 ♪ How you gon' react When the joker's in the back ♪ 2371 01:31:00,910 --> 01:31:03,946 ♪ And he's all up in your ear, Cyrano de Bergerac ♪ 2372 01:31:04,013 --> 01:31:07,350 ♪ So say what I say This is impractical attack ♪ 2373 01:31:07,417 --> 01:31:09,419 ♪ Whoa, clock is ticking ♪ 2374 01:31:09,485 --> 01:31:11,220 ♪ You gon' fold Or you gon' follow through ♪ 2375 01:31:11,287 --> 01:31:14,357 ♪ Time's up, Decide what you gon' do ♪ 2376 01:31:14,424 --> 01:31:16,159 ♪ Clock is ticking, You gon' fold ♪ 2377 01:31:16,225 --> 01:31:17,760 ♪ Or you gon' follow through ♪ 2378 01:31:17,826 --> 01:31:20,196 ♪ Time's up, Decide what you gonna do ♪ 2379 01:31:20,263 --> 01:31:22,198 ♪ Call us comedy cowboys ♪ 2380 01:31:22,265 --> 01:31:23,900 ♪ We quick with the trigger ♪ 2381 01:31:23,966 --> 01:31:26,235 ♪ A gang of wisecrackers Leaving you in stitches ♪ 2382 01:31:26,302 --> 01:31:28,071 ♪ When you see These tricksters coming ♪ 2383 01:31:28,137 --> 01:31:29,572 ♪ You know They up to something ♪ 2384 01:31:29,639 --> 01:31:31,074 ♪ Setting you up To get you cornered ♪ 2385 01:31:31,140 --> 01:31:32,542 ♪ Execute without warning ♪ 2386 01:31:32,608 --> 01:31:35,378 ♪ You're the casualty Of a jokester ♪ 2387 01:31:35,445 --> 01:31:38,014 ♪ The satirical Casanova ♪ 2388 01:31:38,081 --> 01:31:42,085 ♪ We swift with the wits, Seven years still a hit ♪ 2389 01:31:42,151 --> 01:31:43,886 ♪ Did the movie, Shit's legit ♪ 2390 01:31:43,953 --> 01:31:45,788 - ♪ Impractical humorists ♪ - ♪ Impractical ♪ 2391 01:31:45,855 --> 01:31:48,658 ♪ Impractical because I'm cold when I'm hot ♪ 2392 01:31:48,725 --> 01:31:51,894 ♪ I run a marathon In flip-flops ♪ 2393 01:31:51,961 --> 01:31:53,363 ♪ Impractical ♪ 2394 01:31:53,429 --> 01:31:55,565 ♪ I'm the one And then I'm not ♪ 2395 01:31:55,631 --> 01:31:57,700 ♪ I rose to the top When I dropped ♪ 2396 01:31:57,767 --> 01:32:00,970 ♪ Time's up, Time to knock this shit up ♪ 2397 01:32:01,037 --> 01:32:04,307 ♪ I'm a joker, Impractically nuts ♪ 2398 01:32:04,374 --> 01:32:07,243 ♪ With my crew, About to light this shit up ♪ 2399 01:32:07,310 --> 01:32:10,213 ♪ I'm a joker, I'm practically nuts ♪ 2400 01:32:10,279 --> 01:32:13,449 ♪ Impractical, impractical ♪ 2401 01:32:13,516 --> 01:32:15,017 ♪ Joker ♪ 2402 01:32:15,084 --> 01:32:16,919 ♪ Impractical, impractical ♪ 2403 01:32:16,986 --> 01:32:18,254 ♪ Joker ♪ 2404 01:32:18,321 --> 01:32:19,956 ♪ Impractical, impractical ♪ 2405 01:32:20,022 --> 01:32:21,157 ♪ Joker ♪ 2406 01:32:21,224 --> 01:32:22,959 ♪ Impractical, impractical ♪ 2407 01:32:23,025 --> 01:32:24,260 ♪ Joker ♪ 173788

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