Original subtitles

♪ Warriors for Hire are here ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ It's the name and career ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ For sleuthing siblings who quest ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ Which is what they do best ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ They have special tools ♪

♪ For which they are fools ♪

♪ These guys lose their mind when they collect and find ♪

♪ The Mighty Magi...swords ♪

Announcer: At Warriors For Hire Headquarters!

En garde! -Okay, Noville,

all I need you to do is to take out

each of these grizzly creatures with various techniques.

Vambre, they're so cute.

I don't know if I could possibly harm such cuddly critters.

They're not cuddly, Noville.

They're evil, and they spat sugary gum

in all your favorite books!

[ Evil laughter ] No!

It'll leave uncleanable stains!

Bumble rocket!

Grappling harpoon!

Valentine! [ Giggles ]

Take that, dentally-irresponsible critters!

It appears you've mastered

your Swish Navy Magisword quite nicely.

I think it's time for you to begin using other Magiswords.

I'll start you off with a few easy options.

Announcer: Bunch of Magiswords for noobs!

For me?! Vambre, you shouldn't have!

Think nothing of it, dearie.

Give them a jolly good spin!

[ Laughs ] You're disheveled.

Vambre, I'm so sorry!

I'm disavowing Magiswords from this moment on!

I just can't bear to hurt you ever again!

Noville, dear heart, I'm not hurt!

This is nothing a warm bath and a change of wardrobe can't fix.

We'll continue our lessons next week.

[ Sighs ] Aw, duder, what's wrong?

I've really enjoyed learning about Magisword-play

from you guys, but I'm still not getting the sense

that Vambre and I are getting any closer as friends.

It feels like senpai will never notice me.

I think it'd get her attention

if you give her something 'spensive!

Oh, hey, I know! I bet she'd love a Magisword!

But, I'm all out of jemms after paying for the repairs from

[whispers] the incident.

Dork!

Don't sweat it, buddy.

I got just the solution.

Oh, good. I like solutions!

Are you gonna tell --

Why are you so high-maintenance?!

Grup and his buds run a level-one cave out

in the Barren Faceland.

Between your fancy Swish Navy Magisword

and your expert training, you should get through

without so much as a paper cut.

Um... I should, or, like, will?

Okay, dude, you're making me exhale. [ Sighs ]

Announcer: Soon, at the Cave of Stuff!

Um, is the theme faces, suns?

Hello? Guess nobody's home.

[ Gasps ] My vital organs!

For Vambre, Noville -- for Vambre!

Oh, gumdrops! This is how it ends!

No!

I see my political campaign

has proven to be very a-pealing to you.

Political campaign, banana puns?

What's going on here, Grup?!

Vote for Grup! A vote for Grup is a vote for...

[slurps]...normalcy.

-[ Screams ] -Vote for Grup, please!

Halt! I see Grup has attempted

to indoctrinate you with his twisted campaign.

Slander! I've never once claimed to be a doctor.

[ Sighs ] Is this really the kind

of leader an informed, progressive individual

like yourself would choose to run your dungeon?

Choices make me anxious!

[ Screams ] You need to vote!

Early and often!

-No, no, no, no, no! -Noville!

Lady Hiss, it's so nice to--

Follow me. What?

What the juice, Hiss?

There are matters at hand which require your attention.

Huh? Listen closely.

It all started last week,

the beginning of this year's election season.

Grup usually runs uncontested, and everyone votes for him

because his unbridled joy keeps the Cave of Stuff

running pretty well managed.

But this year, Skullivan was cheesed.

He was all, [as Skullivan] "Grup, bruh, you, like, never

address anything in the Cave of Stuff's

complaint box!"

[ Normal voice ] And Grup was all, [as Grup] "Whatevs,

I didn't even know we had one of those.

The new cave theme starts tomorrow, so, like,

take a chill pill and chillax or whatever."

[ Normal voice ] And then, he just kept walking

with his clipboard like he was all important and stuff.

And then Skullivan was like,

[as Skullivan] "Duder, can't you just

take a look at one of them, just to show you, like, care?"

[ Normal voice ] And Grup just looks at him

and goes, [as Grup] "Why don't

you, like, work on your cave obstacles

for this month's theme?

I've got bigger things to worry about right now."

[ Normal voice ] Skull bae wasn't having it.

He declared his intent to run against Grup

for the position of cave leader.

And you know Grup was not feeling that at all.

So just to be a jerk-face,

Grup pulled me over and made me his running mate.

Skullivan was like, "Bruh, Hiss is my best friend.

How dare you?!" And I was all, like, "Aw, thanks, boo."

Then Skullivan grabbed Prug and said he was gonna be

his running mate, and Grup was all,

[As Grub] "That's my brother! How dare you?!"

[ Normal voice ] And with the Squiddlies split

on who they're voting for, Grup and Skullivan

are looking for the swing vote

from the first stranger who wanders into this cave.

And guess what, Noville. Yes, Lady Hiss?

You're that stranger. N-o-o-o-o-o!

Announcer: So, uh, what are the Warriors up to?!

[ Roars ] Looks like somebody

showed up on slime!

Ready, Vambre? As ever, little brother!

Announcer: Paper Bag Magisword!

Bling Bling Magisword!

Together: Super Teamwork Combo --

Crystal Container!

Y'all are a couple of life savers!

In addition to payment, I offer you a compliment, Vambre.

Your new threads look cuter

than an otter wrapped in 12 blankets.

Oh, don't be silly, Fud.

Prohyas was kind enough to loan me an outfit for laundry day.

[ Roars ] Och!

Well, one of us is going home to change,

and it's not me.

Announcer: Cool! Now back to Noville!

Noville: Now this is a delightful little challenge.

I can get a boost from my Propeller Blade.

[ Screams ]

Huh, I'm alive, but I feel exactly

one-half a unit of health measurement weaker.

Oh! Can't forget about that one!

This one looks different than the rest.

A campaign button?

I can't finish this cave if I can't collect all the coins.

Assault, assault! See?

Such a cruel ruler can't be expected

to run a dungeon fairly!

Nobody would vote for a nanner-faced loser!

This has to end, you guys.

I just can't with this anymore.

I propose a fight to the finish!

Yeah, a "finish" match!

Heavens to sweet pea, no!

I was thinking maybe an organized debate or something.

Announcer: Hey, weren't the Warriors doing some stuff?!

How we doing over there, Vamburitto?

This appears to be the last of them.

So when are you guys gonna bring back that slug-rib sandwich?

Whoops! You know, you're sort of

asking for the attention,

wearing a Slug Burger uniform to a mall.

My wardrobe is running a bit thin by this point, brother.

[ Growls ]

A little reckless abandon should tidy this up!

Vambre, wait!

Announcer: Oinkus Oinkus Magisword!

Sorry, Vambre, safety first.

[ Groans ] Announcer: Da bait!

Why won't my opponent open the suggestion box?

Not once has he given this a glance.

There are important issues in this thing

that are being totally ignored.

Concerns like, why is there no hazelnut spread

in the break room?

We've got ketchup packets,

mustard packets, even mayo packets.

Relish, does that come in a packet?

I don't know. Hazelnut spread -- delicious.

Put it on a bagel -- bam -- you got energy for days.

This is a worthwhile expense.

It keeps your workforce happy and healthy.

Productivity goes up.

Productivity, I'm told, is a good thing to have.

So let's have more it even.

We can have all productivity ever.

Keep that productivity in a lock box,

hide it under your bed.

No one else is getting their filthy mitts

on that productivity.

It's mine now. I own it.

So can you, if you vote for me.

I yield the rest of my time.

My opponent raises many valid concerns.

He's a stand-up guy. I love him.

I've kissed him on the cheek

on at least two separate occasions.

But can he do this?

Oops.

Oops.

Oops.

O-o-o-o-ps.

Oops.

Oops.

Please clap.

You know what?

Let's hear from the running mates.

Come on, Prug. This could be fun.

Yes, fun.

Okay, Prug, as assistant manager,

will you expand dental care to include spikes, horns,

and other external bony-bobs?

[ Rumbling ] Um...

Um...

Anarchy!

Prug! You broke my brother, you monster!

It's our job, you unprofessional mega-goobus!

That's enough!

You're being so mean to each other,

and your campaign doesn't make a lick of sense!

Until you guys can be civil,

I don't think I can vote for anyone.

Announcer: Meanwhile, at the Rhyboflaven Bazaar!

I want to surprise Grup

with some Brocco Bits sandwich cookies.

He's been under a lot of stress at work lately.

I don't know why I needed to come along.

This is so humiliating.

Ya know, nobody forced you to put on half a horse costume.

If only I had one last decent thing to wear!

Hey, that is an offensive ungulate stereotype!

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Glitter sparkle attack!

Announcer: Beginner Shield Magisword!

Crumbs!

You're not sitting on any furniture after that.

[ Groans ] Announcer: At the final room

of the Cave of Stuff!

Okay, just one precarious bridge

stands between me and that Magisword!

Maybe just for safety.

No one ever got anywhere by taking risks.

-Hold it! -Oh, no!

Don't throw your vote away --

specifically by not voting for me!

I'm the leader! I've always leaded!

I'm here, too!

Guys, guys, stop!

Anarchy!

Hey, guys.

[ Screaming ]

-Oof! -I'd just like to point out

that if I were in charge, this bridge would've been up to code.

Fragile bridges are a classic dungeon trap!

You can't just change tradition willity-nillity!

Guys, be quiet!

Um, please? [ Grunts ]

As an unfit nerd, I lack the capacity to lift us all up.

Guys, my boots are melting.

M-my boots are melting, guys.

No, I have idea. Give me your feet.

Okay, now your legs.

Now your torso.

I made it!

-Yay! -Yay!

-Yay! -Now, let's pull

everyone up together.

This won't work.

I literally have no muscles.

[ Gasps ] What do we do?! What do we do?!

What do we do?! Hurry -- my hands get

super sweaty when I'm nervous!

Prug, we need to lighten the load!

Flap your flightless wings as hard as you can!

[ Grunting ]

♪♪

[ Panting ] What are we doing, man?

Your unusually quick thinking saved everyone's lives.

Maybe you should just stay the leader.

I should've been a better listener-er.

You know what? How about I address one grievance right now?

Oh, look what I have behind my back, somehow.

"Can we get some air conditioning

in this sweltering hot box?"

What? Dude, we work in a desert.

That, on top of my lack of sweat glands

and this month's sun theme have been destroying me.

Yeah, I didn't want to say anything.

I'm cold-blooded, but I have my limits.

I never noticed.

I'll get us a weather gnome right away.

Beep-boop-boop-beep, beep-beep-boop-boop-boop.

Hello, Dial-A-Gnome?

One winter weather gnome, please.

[ Bird caws ]

[ Growls ]

[ Snores ] Honk.

[ Exhales ]

-Hm -Right on, man.

I humbly withdraw from the race.

Yay, you did it!

Now, uh, what do we have here?

Announcer: Sun Face Magisword!

Neat! Yeah, I get the theming of this cave now.

It's cute. Vambre will love this!

Um, how do we get out of here?

[ Sighs ] I'll call Dial-A-Bridge.

Announcer: That evening!

Good evening, Vambre --

Uh, dress cute.

You don't need to be polite, Noville.

These clothes were kind of a last resort.

It's been a day.

No! It's good! You're the bee's disease.

Uh, I mean, uh -- here!

I got -- thing!

I beat my first dungeon alone today,

so I thought you'd like the -- y-you don't like it,

do you? No, no, it's lovely,

It's just -- Announcer:

Another Sun Face Magisword!

You were at Grup's cave, right?

I already visit that one regularly.

Oh. Well, I guess it's good to have two.

Why don't you keep it?

It's about time you had more than one Magisword,

and it sounds like you earned this.

Oh. Yeah, I guess. Thanks.

So, um, good night.

Wait, Noville, have you eaten yet?

So how's your rosemary?

Sparse, crunchy.

And your parsley?

Um, good, I think.

So tell me, Noville, how was it collecting that Magisword?

Did they pull any tricky traps on you?

Uh, I don't know about traps.

It was more like puzzle-slash-obstacle-based.

Those can count.

Oh, uh, in that case, I suppose...

♪♪