Original subtitles

♪ Warriors for Hire are here ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ It's the name and career ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ For sleuthing siblings who quest ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ Which is what they do best ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ They have special tools ♪

♪ For which they are fools ♪

♪ These guys lose their mind when they collect and find ♪

♪ The Mighty Magi...swords ♪

♪♪

Announcer: At the Printed Page bookshop --

reading's fun!

Witchy Simone, what a pleasant surprise!

I'm here to pick up the latest issue of "Mercenaries Monthly."

They arrived this morning. And looky here -- Vambre and

Prohyas made the cover again!

I'm so proud of my bestest besties.

Still, it'd be nice if they let me on a mission once in a while,

instead of, you know, never.

Ah, I'm sure they'll give you a chance, eventually.

Why, just last week, I went on a mission with the Warriors

to the temple of Ginkago Billobeyah.

We had to fight a Sasquatch, and --

Wha-what?!

They took a complete noob, but not their former classmate?!

Oh, gosh. [ Screaming ]

Door slam! Thank you for shopping

at the Printed Page,

where the difference is quality.

Announcer: A few days later at Warriors for Hire Headquarters!

Hello, welcome to Warriors for Hire Headquart -- no!

Prohyas: Wow. Well, okay, now I have to see who's out there.

Welcome to -- G-G-G-Gateaux?!

[ Weak meow ] What are you doing here?!

Within 100 yards of us? Voluntarily?

[ Crying ] I need your help!

I'll say. That outfit is so last year. Ah!

Now, you just right down, I insist.

Your couch is really crinkly.

[ Chuckles ]

Pardon me a moment.

Grup, be nice! Easy for you to say.

I'm the one who just cleaned the couch.

How may we be of service?

I need you to get Witchy Simone out of Witch Way!

Oh, well that doesn't seem too --

Both: Witchy Simone is in Witch Way?!

Please allow me to explain in the ancient art of flashback.

The three of us were on a mission

to make a revenge potion for the Mysterious Hooded Woman.

She wouldn't explain why she wanted that.

The key ingredient was an albino cockroach toad,

whose natural habitat is the Dirt Temple catacombs.

We've been walking around in circles for several minutes!

The MPS won't work out here.

Gateaux, this is your fault somehow.

Wha-what, but-- Silence!

And you, if you want to be a legitimate part of

this legitimate business,

you have to wear the uniform and work weekends!

Oh, uh, okay. Let me get with the program.

"Gothicus dudsyduds!" How's this?!

A significant improvement.

Gateaux, learn something from her.

I don't look good in dresses. I have no hips.

Silence! Silence? Aah!

Now then, where's that Dirt Temple?

If only these doopy trees weren't in my magnificent way!

I got-- I have just the spell!

Deforesting spell, deforesting spell!

Deforest this forest, and do the job well!

[ Gasps ] Yes!

The lousy entrance to the foolish catacombs!

Witchy Simone, you little genius, you!

You remind me of me, but only slightly less put together.

Aw, go on with ya.

Our quest continues -- no thanks to you, Gateaux!

You good for nothing flea bag.

Nothing? I took care of my flea problem.

It's too dark to see anything.

Dark.

I blew out my light magic doing our promotional fireworks show.

Guys, it's cool. I got this.

Give the darkness such a slap,

give this phone a lighty app. Here ya go, Morby.

You're so clever with your phone prowess and independent thought.

I like that in a partner. In what universe?

Gateaux, what did I say about back-talk?!

So where are those albino cockroach things?

According to Magipedia,

they should be at the lowest level of this place.

We'll have to find a way down.

Our signal is better down here, ain't that weird?

What?! That'll take valuable minutes,

and I'm clinically impatient. Impatient.

Uh! I -- I have a spell for--

Super spell, please cure my frown!

Help us go one level down!

Is something supposed to be happening--

[ Screaming ]

We did it!

You're darling little force of nature, I adore you!

Oh, you. Now we just gotta find--

[ Shuddering ] Get it off me, please!

Gateaux, whatever you do, don't lose it!

But... it's so slimy.

Stop your incessant sound-making!

Hey, if you're suddenly so dissatisfied

with my performance,

why don't you get the Warriors for Hire to do this for you?

Gah! Get it off me! Get it off me!

Get it off, get it off, get it off!

Can't even sass me right. Get serious, butter paws!

Please help me!

I'm genuinely asking you for the smallest bit of compassion!

Why did he have to bring up the stinking Warriors?!

Fakey friends, those two!

Ha -- friends -- with the Warriors?!

Why would anyone want to be friends with the loser-brigade?

A friend would help me!

I hate how they always treat me like a kid!

I went to Adventuring Academy with them!

I'm the same age as they are!

Hey, wait, weren't you mooks there, too?

Mooks?!

Fat lot of good that did them.

The swords do all the work for them.

And what's up with the arm bands on Prohyas?

Is he strength training?

And those huge earrings on Vambre?!

Who even wears big jewelry anymore, anyway?!

[ Squeals ] Oh, hey,

the albino bug thing!

Is it still on me? I feel like he's still on me!

Gateaux, please. Please with the helping!

This is my daily life. Check this out!

[ Screaming ] Why?!

[ Laughing ]

Moisture!

Just awful.

So that's why there was a rain cloud.

I was wondering about that, but I thought it rude to ask.

Please, you have to break up Simone and Morbidia

so things can get back to normal.

Warrior huddle! His story is compelling,

but we could be doing the hokey pokey directly into a trap.

A valid concern, but I don't think he's a good enough writer

to have made up that story.

He's wrecking my nice, clean couch.

Gateaux! We'll take the job!

Cry no more, for we'll break up those tricky witches.

Announcer: The Next Day! Oy, with the claws!

Are we there yet? Clearly, we are not!

Sis, can you run the plan by me one more time?

We're going to try to cut off Witchy Simone and Morbidia

at the Pteradon Temple in Dinosaur Kingdom.

Last I checked, we --

er, they got a mission from someone named Frostferatu...

[ Both groan ] To steal a mummified egg

from the Pteradon Temple.

King Rexxtopher is just going to love that.

How do we pin-point Witchy Simone's whereabouts?

She's not picking up her MagiMobile,

which is a bit troubling,

considering this is one-ring Witchy.

I got this. [ Inhales ]

Hey, squirt! Witchy Simone:

That's not my name!

Yeah, she's 20 miles down that way.

Morbidia: Shoo! Shoo! Get out of here,

you semi-sentient umbrellas!

Yeah, beat it, ya saber-tooth tiger chow!

Ha! Good one. If Gateaux was here,

those buzzards would have made him go running home,

crying into his big ball of yarn!

Yeah, what a terrified tabby!

[ Laughing ]

So refreshing to have a cohort I have so much in common with.

Pay them no mind, Gateaux.

If we are to bypass Witchy Way

and have Gateaux obtain the egg first,

we must be quiet and stick to the shadows.

Announcer: Ninjappear-- Shh!

Announcer: Sorry! Um, Ninjappearance Magisword.

Ninja Vanish!

♪ Ninja Prohyas ♪

♪ He moves swiftly and manly ♪

♪ Through the night ♪

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

Announcer: Bag of Snakes Magisword.

Snake-cessories!

Announcer: Boulder Magisword.

[ Pinball pinging ]

Simone, your consistent displays of mystical competency

continue to impress me! Aw, thanks!

It's nice to know my talents are appreciated.

I love it when you blow things up!

Could I borrow a bit of your magic and give that a try?

Do what now? Oh, I forgot,

you missed the senior year

at Adventure Academy.

Witches can borrow each other's powers by shaking hands. See?

All right! Blammo!

Cheese and crackers, that was a regular hoot!

We're gonna make a great pair of magical mercenary!

Drat! Every effort thwarted!

Now where is Gateaux?

[ Shivering ] Prohyas: Och! I got this.

Look at the shiny.

Shiny? [ Goofy laughing ]

Ooh! Someday, I will finally catch that glowing menace!

According to the map, the entrance to the egg's chamber

is directly below us one level.

Dude. [ "Dude" echoes ]

Hey, check out that echo. [ Echoes ]

Lads, I have a plan so good, there's no way they can stop it.

Stop it! [ Echoes ]

Stop it. [ Echoes ]

Stop it. [ Echoes ]

Stop it. [ Echoes ]

Stop it. [ Echoes ]

Stop it.

Stop it. [ Echoes ]

Stop it.

Stop it. [ Echoes ]

Stop it!

Stop it. Stop it!

Seriously, stop it.

Both: Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!

Announcer: Stop it!

So the book they was looking for

was checked out by me the whole time.

Ha! What a couple of -- how do you say it -- mooks!

Yeah! Geez, there's a lot of cobwebs in here.

I mean, ambience is a thing but...

[ Both scream ]

Who's responsible for this?!

We are response-bibble for this.

-You?! -Vambre, Prohyas?!

To keep the peace, we are stopping you

from stealing the egg.

Now you both can take 40 wicked winks.

Announcer: Sleeping Dragon Magisword!

Ooh, it's a comfy web.

No! I must stay awake! What?!

[ Snores annoyingly ] [ Rumbling ]

Announcer: Brick Magisword! No, no, no, no, no.

[ Snoring continues ]

Simone, you did it again with your genius snoring!

I did -- I did what now?!

Take my hand, Simone.

Listen, we have a long slog back to the temple.

Thanks for being such a good

pal.

[ Screams ]

Open says me!

I'm off to get my fortune. Thanks for power up. Ha!

Announcer: Boomerang Magisword!

If you'll excuse me, I'm going home.

At least I know Mascott won't reject me.

Aw, come on, Simone!

We've never rejected you,

we just think you need a bit more schooling

before we bring you on a mission.

But for now, how about we get you some swift revenge

on Morbidia?

Oh, man, I could really go for some revenge right now!

Announcer: Meanwhile! Frostferatu's fortune

will soon be all mine.

Gateaux, where've you been?!

In the gutter, where you left me!

Oh, don't be needlessly dramatic.

You know I can't stand it when people are needlessly dramatic!

I just needed to use Simone's powers

to blast my way out of that temple.

That wouldn't have worked with you.

And, besides, Gateaux, I need you.

You need me?

Yes, I couldn't possibly do this

without your particular set of skills --

carrying this egg! So step on it!

Allow me! See what I did there?

Stop in the name of King Rexxtopher!

Oh, crudmuffins, he's already here.

But stealing the super rare mummified pteradon egg?

That's low -- even for youses guys.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no! We're trying to stop them!

You see, our best bud Simone here --

Talk to the claw!

None of you is stealing no nothing never mind

from my kingdom! It's squishing time!

[ Screaming ]

Get out of there, Morbidia!

Thanks, sister! Hey, a little help?

Sure. You totally weren't pulling off that look. Ha!

[ Growls ]

Gateaux, the egg!

Announcer: Hook Magisword! Electric Eel Magisword!

Both: Super Teamwork Combo -- Hooked on an Eeling!

Hang on, Prohyas, this is going to be painful!

I wouldn't have it any other way!

And skidoop! Don't do my thing.

Gateaux?!

Gateaux. Let's get out of here.

Victory is ours!

Ours. Announcer:

Five minutes later!

In exchange, I want two cheat days on my diet,

five talk-backs with no repercussions per week,

and once a month, I want a hug.

Fine! Just give it to me!

It's a fake!

Yeah, Prohyas made it for me

with his Giant Egg and Mummy Magiswords

when we were up in that explosion cloud.

Hug time! No!

I'm allergic to expressions of love!

Love.

So you were on the level.

Thanks for protecting my important eggy.

You're all still banished.

And before we leave this forbidden kingdom,

I just want to say we're so sorry.

We had no idea you were upset about being left behind.

Who wouldn't be upset?

Although I really should have talked to you guys

instead of running off with some mooks like I did.

I'm not ready for adventuring after all.

Surely you jest!

After all, who was the cute warrior witch I saw earlier

throwing a Tyrannosaur to the ground?

Was it my sister, Witchy Sparkles?

It was you, Simone!

You are welcome to join us

for some proper on-the-job warrior training!

Really and for true?!

Rexx: Do youse not know what "banished" means?!

[ Upbeat music playing ]