Original subtitles

♪ Warriors for hire are here ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ It's the name and career ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ Siblings who quest ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ Which is what they do best ♪

♪ Mighty Magiswords ♪

♪ They have special tools ♪

♪ For which they are fools ♪

♪ These guys lose their mind when they collect and find ♪

♪ The Mighty Magi...swords ♪

Announcer: Mighty Magiswords!

♪♪

Announcer: At Warriors For Hire Headquarters --

Kablam!

[ Groans ]

Bweezness has been at a terrible slog for some time.

Yes. Slo-o-o-o-o-o-og.

I do hope we get some work so-o-on.

Mm...as...do...I.

Arm wrestle?

Yes!

[ Both groaning ]

[ Both sigh ]

Hmm. Oh!

I think I know how we can spice this up a bit.

Muscly Arm Magisword!

[ Both groaning ]

Please stop fighting! Scary!

Grup, dear, don't be dramatic. We're not fighting.

We're arm wrestling. -Yeah, duder.

We're just trying to pass the time before the next gig.

You guys are arm fighting because you're not working?!

Is this the end of Warriors For Hire?

Noooooooo!

Oh, geez. Grup's gone into vapor lock.

[ Sighs ] That tone is making me nauseous.

Remember how you talked down

Zombie Pumpkin Magisword that one time?

Try that.

Ohhh.

Oh, it's okay, homey, buddy.

Sis and I aren't fighting,

and we're not -- currently -- broke.

Try to chill in 3...2...1.

Oh. Your voice is pleasant.

Ah, thanks, Grup.

I'm gonna go nap off my anxieties now.

They grow up so fast.

You're quite the dragon whisperer, aren't you?

I didn't whisper. [ Doorbell ringing rapidly ]

A customer! A customer!

Both: Welcome to Warriors for Hire,

where your issue is our miss...ion.

-Hello, Warriors. -Hoppus. Sup?

I've been hired to bring you this message from the kingdom.

What me-- [ Groans ]

It's a royal summons from Princess Zange.

Both: Princess Zange?

Gainful employment awaits!

You want a sandwich?

No.

Okay, yes.

Announcer: Later, at Rhyboflaven Castle!

So, check it out, Warriors. I got a mission for ya.

[ Both squeal ]

We've got a little trouble going down in Loch Mess.

-Dig? -Ohh.

What's Loch Mess?

It's that swampy spot with the giant Piggeh Guard.

You know, Loch Mess is a sub-kingdom

of Rhyboflaven or something.

They're ruled by Wilbur Pork Loin III.

He's cute and old.

We send them a big ol' offering every year to keep the peace,

but the delivery folks keep not coming back.

It's a bad scene. It's been going on for months.

Months? You mean you kept

sending people?

Well, I kept not getting a "thank you" note from the king,

so I thought maybe it got lost.

15 times.

Both: 15 times?!

Yeah. Give or take.

I need you guys to scope it out.

Coolsville? -The coolest...ville.

And, guys, if you can solve this problem for me...

-Yeah? -...I'll make you

the official go-to adventurers

for Royal Rhyboflaven missions!

Is groove in the house?

Warrior huddle.

[ Both giggle maniacally, clear throats ]

We graciously accept this mission.

Sweet like a lolly! One last thing --

There's some seriously slammin' swine in that burg.

I've read that if you bring pork products with you,

you can scare them into chilling out.

Is that so?

Well, then I know where to bring home the bacon!

Announcer: Soon, at Ralphio's House of Swords!

There it is.

It'll take every last jemm I've got,

but for the sake our kingdom,

I'm gonna buy this Bacon Magisword

I've been wanting for months!

You brave boy.

Yeah, I am.

Excellent, Prohyas.

What a glorious day this is for us both.

Why's that?

Because I marked it up significantly.

Just now.

[ Record scratches ] I --

Hey, sis, could I borrow a couple hundred jemms?

You can be brave, too. [ Groans ]

Just one more thing we absolutely need to do.

Announcer: Soon, at Slugburger!

We most certainly did not absolutely need this.

Witchy Simone, dear, can we ask you to feed Grup for a few days?

[ Whispering ] We're leaving on a secret mission.

Announcer: Microphone Magisword!

Princess Zange is hiring us to go to Loch Mess

and find their missing delivery people!

If we succeed, we'll become

the Royal Court's office go-to adventurers!

Whoo! Whoo!

Whoo, whoo!

Hey! Keep it down over there!

Huh. Good for them, though.

Did you hear that, Gateaux?

Those darn old warriors have been a thorn in my side

ever since we were all at Adventure Academy together.

Thorn? Thorn!

For years, they've tried to best us

with their "magic swords" and their "actually caring."

Eh, caring...

This looks like a job better off assigned

to Witch Way, Sorcerers For Hire!

Sorcerers!

If we follow them and finish the job first,

the princess will be sure

to make us the official adventurers instead!

Official...

We'll save the dorkuses first,

and then get all the fame and glory!

Dorkuses!

[ Record scratches ] Uh...glory?

Glory!

Soon the names of Morbidia and Gateaux

will be on the lips of every schlub in Lyvsheria!

Lips! [ Record scratches ]

Uh, schlub?

Look, maybe this would be easier

if I just said stuff like everybody else does.

No! Why am I not allowed

to say things?

Announcer: Later, at Loch Mess!

We're searching for the tall guard piggeh.

I think I've seen him somewhere around he...re.

[ Clears throat ] Hey, pig duder!

We want to figure out what happened

to all the missing delivery people!

Okay, awesome, 'cause I was wondering that, too.

Wait. So you don't know, either?

Mister...? -Uh, Hambus.

I just stand guard in this spot all day,

and nobody tells me nothing.

But I can take you to the castle and ask in person.

All right! All right!

Yeah, just climb onto my back.

Huh.

[ Blubbers ]

Ah. I'm sliding. Yeah, I'm sliding.

Brother, do hold on. [ Groans ]

Announcer: Wickersnapper Magisword!

Fuss!

I'll take you both to the queen

so you guys can get this all sorted out.

Wait. A queen?

I thought it was ruled by a king.

I don't know. Maybe it was a typo?

There was a photograph.

-Maybe it was phot-o? -Glub, glub, glub, glub.

Announcer: Soon, at Loch Mess Castle!

Uh, presenting her Royal Majesty,

Queen Porcina Pork Loin.

Oh! Hambus!

You've brought me some more.

And these two are colorful like petite flowers.

I'm a manly flower!

[ Deep voice ] Whatever you say, beefcake!

[ Normal voice ] You're still going to be the prettiest

of all my beloved pets.

Pets? Pets?

Hot broccoli nuggets!

-[ Shudders ] -Oh!

It's Fluffy-bum! Who's my baby?

Who's a good little baby? -Please stop.

Time for a tea party!

If you don't drink your tea, you don't get any cookies!

[ All slurp ]

[ All gobbling ]

[ Shudders ] Well, I'm getting back to my post.

Hmm.

No, no, no! Bad Fluffy-bum!

It's Steve! Steeeeve!

You sure about that, Steeeeve?

Well, I know a certain Loch Mess Nomster...

[ Sweet voice ] that says otherwise.

I'm your good pet, Fluffy-bum. [ Cries ]

I'm Fluffy-bum!

That's a good baby boo.

Avoiding hostilities like this

are what the peace offerings were supposed to be for!

[ Deep voice ] Oh, you mean all that broccoli stuff

the pets brought with them? Barfola, am I right?

My daddy, the king, was into that stuff,

but he went to that big sty in the sky months ago.

I'm way more into my adorable new pets!

You must set these delivery folk free.

Oh, yeah?! And what are you aiming to do about it?

I didn't want it to have to come to this,

but you've forced my hand!

Bacon Magisword!

Aaaah!

[ Panting ]

[ Cackles ] What even was that?

That's so doopy!

That doesn't scare you? Like -- Like at all?

Uh...no!

I mean, how would you react if I started

waving a sword that looked like a human body part?

Oh, you mean like this one?

Yeah! Just like that.

Well, perhaps my trusty first magisword

will make you release them!

Announcer: Tomato Magisword!

[ Splat, splat, splat! ]

So, what are you gonna do, make us a BLT?

Where's your lettuce sword?

It's on back order.

Guard pigs! Get rid of these guys!

[ Sweet voice ] They're silly!

Hmm. It's on, isn't it, sis?

Indeed.

Wad of Gum Magisword!

♪♪

Laser Pointer Magisword!

Frog Missile Magisword!

Ribbit!

♪ If you have immediate need of sounds from an accordion ♪

♪ You need look no further 'cause I'm standing

on your head ♪

Whoo!

[ Cheering ]

Goodness!

There's a lot of them, aren't there?

Yeah, but I'm in hog heaven!

If we keep at it, we can probably defeat all of them.

You're clearly in over your heads, Warrior Losers!

-Losers. -Witch Way?!

This is our mission now! This...

Both: Owww.

[ Snap! ]

You think that was real adorable

throwing around produce and sneaking in like that.

All of you are too wild to be my pets.

Too bad. Feed these mooks to the Loch Mess Nomster!

So, is your weird mission theft thing,

uh, going how you thought it would?

[ Both cry ]

Well, now not only are we not going to be

the official adventurers for the kingdom...

We're gonna get eaten like shish kabobs!

[ Growling ]

It's the Loch Ness Nomster!

[ Screaming and growling ]

We're gonna get eaten during our big gig!

Our big pig gig.

We'll never get to use our magiswords again

or go on another adventure

or tell Grup to stop tickling me!

-Prohyas, that's it! -What'd I do now?

When you talked to Grup.

You calmed him down with the sound of your voice.

Quickly. Try it on this Nomster beast.

But without my powerful nurturing arms,

it might not work.

If only I could -- Aha!

Gun show!

Hey, buddy. Who's my little man?

Is it you?

[ Laughs ] I bet it's you, isn't it?

Hey. Want to help us get free? Please?

Aah! Thankee!

No, no, no! Why are all my pets so disobedient?

You already have a big obedient pet right here.

Just look!

That's a good nomster.

Now, swim in a circle!

That's a good boy.

Ooh! Can you do a flip, Nommy?

I never knew that the Nomster

was the most adorable pet of all!

So, the rest of us can go, then?

[ Deep voice ] Fine!

Just stop bringing me all that broccoli crud,

and our kingdoms are cool.

[ Sweet voice ] Ohh! Who's my Nom Nom Nomster?

Announcer: Outside the Loch Mess Castle!

Hmm?

[ Cheering ]

We did it!

I can't help but wonder what happened to --

Morbidia: Look at me! Yeah.

It is we, Witch Way, who are your saviors.

-Eh, saviors. -What the what?!

And what saviors would we be

if we didn't provide a means of escape?

-Provide. -Hooray.

Yes. That's right. And remember --

tell Princess Zange that Witch Way saved you.

Witch Way.

Sudden plan.

Announcer: Bird Call Magisword!

[ Bird squawks ]

That's Witch for Witch.

And Way for Wa--

Oh, my.

[ Squawk! ]

Morbidia: Put us down!

I...will...end you!

Oh, stuff a sock in it.

Announcer: Soon, at Castle Rhyboflaven!

Beaucoup congrats, Warriors,

for saving all those delivery people.

It was our honor, Princess.

The Warriors For Hire are now

the official go-to adventurers

for the Royal Court of Rhyboflaven!

[ Both squeal ] And now,

your first assignment.

Yeah?! Yeah?!

So while doing all that research for this mission,

I found out about these things called Loch Mess Nomsters.

Can you guys get me one? They're totes adorbs.

Wha-- Wha--

♪♪