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[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
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00:00:04,902 --> 00:00:07,902
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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00:00:25,210 --> 00:00:27,508
- [AIRPLANE WHOOSHING]
- [BIRD SQUAWKING]
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[PILOT] Thank you for flying
Apollonian Airlines.
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00:00:29,810 --> 00:00:32,608
We are beginning our
final descent into Themyscira.
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00:00:32,610 --> 00:00:35,248
Please make sure your
baggage is properly stowed.
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A friendly reminder
that any man who dares
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enter the island will
be killed on arrival.
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- [HARLEY] Ah!
- [PILOT] Enjoy your visit.
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Here's your crown, here's your sash.
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00:00:43,260 --> 00:00:45,458
Here's a reusable penis
straw made of recycled metals,
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00:00:45,460 --> 00:00:47,198
and its cleaning wand
and a carrying pouch.
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00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:49,728
Look at you, makin' your
list, checkin' it twice.
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00:00:49,730 --> 00:00:52,738
You only get bachelorette
weekend-ed once!
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00:00:52,740 --> 00:00:54,370
I'm gonna check on the other girls.
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00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,808
Mrs. Freeze in da house!
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00:00:58,810 --> 00:01:00,708
You ready for the best
weekend of your life?
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00:01:00,710 --> 00:01:02,548
Don't waste your breath.
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I know I'm just a pity invite
because you killed my husband.
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Technically he killed himself.
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00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:07,948
But you still came.
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00:01:07,950 --> 00:01:10,151
That means you're open
to having a good time.
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Well, not really.
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But I've never been to an
all-female island before.
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Seems like it'll be great for crying.
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Hey, Jen!
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[CHUCKLES] It's Jennifer.
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Ah, so glad you could
make it from Michigan.
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Must be hard leaving your four kids.
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Would've been easier if
I was the maid of honor.
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You know, Ivy and I went
to kindergarten together
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and we always said we'd be
each other's maids of honor.
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- [CHUCKLES]
- So cool.
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So special. [GASPS]
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Wow, gross, that must happen a lot.
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[GASPS]
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[JENNIFER] Ah.
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- This is free, right?
- Yep, cheers.
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Ugh. Why did I pay for first
class if you're just gonna
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00:01:44,190 --> 00:01:45,818
- burst in here.
- The curtain's invisible.
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I'm just makin' sure you
have everything you need.
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Can I show you how to
wash your reusable straw?
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You have two minutes
until my Ambien kicks in.
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00:01:51,730 --> 00:01:53,198
But we're about to land.
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Mmm-hmm, I'm trying to catnap through
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as much of this weekend as possible.
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Everyone's ready to party! [WHOOPING]
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00:02:01,570 --> 00:02:03,618
I'm so excited for
you to marry Kite Man.
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00:02:03,620 --> 00:02:05,638
Me, too. I mean, I love him, you know.
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00:02:05,640 --> 00:02:07,278
And I love him!
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Ugh! I mean, if you didn't
marry Kite Man, I would!
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- Oh, okay.
- Yeah, 1,000%.
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I'm gonna set you up for
the best marriage ever
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by making your bachelorette party
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the best weekend of your life!
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- [HARLEY SNIFFS]
- [POISON IVY CLEARS THROAT]
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[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
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_
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[POISON IVY] Wow. This is the most
beautiful place I've ever seen.
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Themyscira Resort works
with the natural landscape.
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It's so you.
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Okay! We're here.
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Everyone out of the invisible van!
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[YAWNS]
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Harley! I'm Eris, the resort manager.
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We spoke on the phone.
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I hope you ladies are
ready for the VIP treatment.
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00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:03,568
This all feels like oddly corporate
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00:03:03,570 --> 00:03:04,599
for the Amazons.
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I mean, they don't seem like the type
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to offer soap concierge.
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Oh, Svetlana knows her suds.
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The economy has been booming
since Wonder Woman disappeared,
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00:03:13,910 --> 00:03:15,308
and Queen Hippolyta brought me on
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to keep that momentum going.
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Hope and Mercy here will
escort you to your suites.
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Take lots of pics and
don't forget to tag us.
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Itineraries are in your rooms.
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Everyone meet in the lobby
in 20 for our spa treatments.
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I have never seen you with a clipboard.
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I mean, I'm... I'm
like impressed with it,
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but it's also kinda freaking me out.
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It's all for you,
Poison Bridey. [CHUCKLES]
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How excited are you to
party with all your besties?
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Uh, look, I know this
isn't like a friend group
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so much as, like, a disparate
collection of strange women
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I glommed on to during the most
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difficult stages of my life, so...
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You deserve a fun girls' trip.
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00:03:49,910 --> 00:03:50,918
And so do they.
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I already took the safe
out of Catwoman's room,
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I had Mrs. Freeze's AC turned way up,
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and I know Jen doesn't like fish, so...
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I said don't call me Jen.
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[JENNIFER CHUCKLES]
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Harley, you have obviously put
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a lot of planning into this trip,
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which just doesn't seem like you.
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00:04:03,430 --> 00:04:04,928
Is everything okay?
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00:04:04,930 --> 00:04:06,429
Of course it is.
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I'm the maid of honor to
the hottest bride on Earth.
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Thanks. For everything.
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[SIGHS]
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I'm truly embarrassed for you.
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- What?
- This whole sweaty maid of honor routine,
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too many thoughtful details.
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You two hooked up.
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What? No! Me? Her? No, never.
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Stop denying it.
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[GROANS] Fine, yes! We kissed. Okay?
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[SIGHS] Feels so great
to say that out loud.
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It's really been weighing on me.
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Thanks for saying something.
I really need a confidante.
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I am not here to support you.
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I do not want to talk about this again.
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Sure, sure, I may have feelings,
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but I'm not gonna act on them. I mean,
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neither of us wants that.
They'll fade over time.
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That's what feelings
are known for doing.
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Neither of us wants that!
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Why don't you say it
one more time to be sure?
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[CLAYFACE] Oh! I have
almost finished the border.
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Hey! That's part of the other cloud.
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Do not force puzzle pieces.
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Look at the cover of the fucking box.
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King, what are you doing in the cabin?
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I thought the open sea was your home.
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It was my home,
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00:05:04,620 --> 00:05:07,358
but I left for unspecified reasons,
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00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:08,725
the origins of which
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I choose not to get into right now.
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Well, hey, this is a bachelor party.
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The Wi-Fi's a little slow,
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00:05:16,367 --> 00:05:19,668
but I think I have some tunes
downloaded on my phone here.
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No.
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00:05:20,973 --> 00:05:23,608
Just the score to Big Momma's House 2.
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Heavens to Betsy.
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A rogue lobster just scuttled aboard.
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[YELPS] Oh, no!
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Oh, no, no, no! I'm not ready for this.
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Nanaue! I have searched
the seven seas for you.
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No! No, no, no!
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It's a talking lobster.
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Have you ever seen anything
as crazy as a lobster talking?
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Who is this Nanaue?
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King, you okay? Do you
owe this lobster money?
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[KING SHARK] I wish
that's all I owed him.
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I told you guys I didn't
want to leave the marina.
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[SAMSON] I and I been
looking for you for months.
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Your father needs you.
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The Hammerheads, they
won't sign the trade deal.
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If the Federation crumbles,
it will start a war.
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You must come home and marry Tabitha,
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for the safety and livelihood
of your entire kingdom.
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00:06:03,810 --> 00:06:05,078
What about what I want?
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00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:06,478
What are you saying?
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00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:07,719
You are Nanaue.
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00:06:07,721 --> 00:06:10,220
Is this an elaborate
prelude to mermaid strippers?
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00:06:10,222 --> 00:06:11,748
I said I did not want strippers.
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No. [GROANS]
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My father is king of the Shark Kingdom
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and I was heir to the throne,
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but I didn't want an arranged marriage.
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So I ran.
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And now it's time for you to shark up.
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- Come, quickly!
- He's with us now.
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So you can go back to Shark Kingdom.
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[CLAYFACE GASPS AND GROANS]
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You should listen to the lobster.
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I'll come with you, Samson,
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but only to tell off my
father once and for all.
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Don't finish the puzzle
without me, guys.
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It would be a betrayal.
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That was weird.
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00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:49,828
How was your snorkeling
lesson, Mrs. Freeze?
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[MRS. FREEZE] I'm starving.
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When's our table gonna be ready?
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Ugh. These patio heaters don't work.
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Ugh. Small talk makes me claustrophobic.
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Tell Ivy I said happy... [SCREECHES]
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[HARLEY] Listen up, you picky bitches!
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This weekend isn't about
what you want to do or not do!
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Get off it, Harley. You suck at this.
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Fuck you, Jennifer!
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00:07:06,811 --> 00:07:08,808
This is about having
the time of our lives
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00:07:08,810 --> 00:07:10,835
to prove to Ivy that we are excited
187
00:07:10,837 --> 00:07:12,608
- for her marriage!
- [JENNIFER GROANING]
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00:07:12,610 --> 00:07:15,648
So, when our bride comes
back from changing her tampon,
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00:07:15,650 --> 00:07:17,018
you better participate,
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you better smile, and
you better start drinking
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like your life depends on it!
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- I don't drink.
- I don't care!
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This vegan golden apple pate is divine.
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[WOODENLY] I don't miss the meat.
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Me too, totally the best.
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00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:32,998
I haven't even thought
about my dead husband once.
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Only my happiness for Ivy.
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00:07:34,870 --> 00:07:36,968
Yay. Cheers to Ivy.
199
00:07:36,970 --> 00:07:38,148
And to Harley,
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00:07:38,150 --> 00:07:40,038
for making this whole
weekend possible, I guess.
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00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:43,308
To having fun on our girls' trip.
202
00:07:43,310 --> 00:07:46,678
Wow. Every one of my awful
friends are having fun.
203
00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:48,178
You have done the impossible.
204
00:07:48,180 --> 00:07:50,188
Oh, can you toast again for the camera?
205
00:07:50,190 --> 00:07:51,891
I want to post it to our sosh meed.
206
00:07:51,893 --> 00:07:54,118
Really? I thought this whole
thing was like a secret island.
207
00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:55,228
Oh, it was.
208
00:07:55,230 --> 00:07:57,688
But now it will be a
premier resort destination
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00:07:57,690 --> 00:07:59,258
for A-Listers only.
210
00:07:59,260 --> 00:08:00,775
Hadids and above.
211
00:08:00,777 --> 00:08:01,806
Right, right.
212
00:08:01,808 --> 00:08:04,195
And, Your Majesty, how
do you feel about that?
213
00:08:04,197 --> 00:08:06,938
I am very onboard with this.
214
00:08:06,940 --> 00:08:09,200
Um, what the fuck is
wrong with the Queen?
215
00:08:09,202 --> 00:08:10,608
Meh! Cultures change.
216
00:08:10,610 --> 00:08:12,008
Who wants to look at a dessert menu?
217
00:08:12,010 --> 00:08:15,318
Is there anything to do
around here besides relax?
218
00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:16,488
Oh, of course.
219
00:08:16,490 --> 00:08:19,321
There's a restorative
waterfall, a wilderness hike,
220
00:08:19,323 --> 00:08:21,178
and just a ferry ride away
221
00:08:21,180 --> 00:08:23,888
there's a tiny island called Hedonikka.
222
00:08:23,890 --> 00:08:25,960
- It has men and they...
- We're doing that.
223
00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:29,988
Look, I'm only here to tell my dad no.
224
00:08:29,990 --> 00:08:31,888
And maybe pick up some lunch.
225
00:08:31,890 --> 00:08:34,998
Nanaue, I've known you
since the day you was born
226
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:36,728
in the bosom of the ocean.
227
00:08:36,730 --> 00:08:38,328
Down here is your home.
228
00:08:38,330 --> 00:08:40,398
Mmm-mmm. I'm a land shark now.
229
00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:43,499
I have land friends, and a land life.
230
00:08:43,501 --> 00:08:46,108
There are so many rules on land.
231
00:08:46,110 --> 00:08:48,178
Nothing beats deep-sea living.
232
00:08:48,180 --> 00:08:51,045
Oh, really? Name one
thing that's better.
233
00:08:51,047 --> 00:08:52,148
Just one?
234
00:08:52,150 --> 00:08:53,880
I can think of many.
235
00:08:55,671 --> 00:08:58,148
♪ The sea plants are always brighter ♪
236
00:08:58,150 --> 00:09:00,358
♪ 'Cause they're fertilized with shit ♪
237
00:09:00,360 --> 00:09:02,788
♪ A land life constrained by toilets ♪
238
00:09:02,790 --> 00:09:05,239
- ♪ Now that really is the pits ♪
- It's not bad.
239
00:09:05,241 --> 00:09:07,758
♪ But when you got the ocean floor ♪
240
00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:09,668
♪ You don't have to wipe no more ♪
241
00:09:09,670 --> 00:09:12,138
- Ugh!
- ♪ Don't fuss with TP ♪
242
00:09:12,140 --> 00:09:14,338
♪ When you go peepee ♪
243
00:09:14,340 --> 00:09:16,838
♪ Beneath the sea ♪
244
00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:19,068
♪ Beneath the sea ♪
245
00:09:19,070 --> 00:09:21,278
♪ You've never had a cleaner ass ♪
246
00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:23,345
♪ Than when you're pooping like a bass ♪
247
00:09:23,347 --> 00:09:24,678
Oh, hey, Franklin.
248
00:09:24,680 --> 00:09:26,348
♪ Octopus ink all day ♪
249
00:09:26,350 --> 00:09:28,348
♪ The blots they float away ♪
250
00:09:28,350 --> 00:09:30,818
♪ Look at the seahorse
he feels no recourse ♪
251
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,018
♪ Beneath the sea ♪
252
00:09:32,020 --> 00:09:34,088
Dave, I haven't seen you in years.
253
00:09:34,090 --> 00:09:36,358
♪ Check out this grouper ♪
254
00:09:36,360 --> 00:09:38,758
♪ Poops like a trouper ♪
255
00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:41,028
♪ And this pink flounder ♪
256
00:09:41,030 --> 00:09:43,168
♪ Using the ground here ♪
257
00:09:43,170 --> 00:09:45,237
Are there other parts of your argument
258
00:09:45,239 --> 00:09:47,968
besides being able to
defecate wherever you want?
259
00:09:47,970 --> 00:09:50,168
♪ No one will notice ♪
260
00:09:50,170 --> 00:09:52,438
♪ Not that sea lotus ♪
261
00:09:52,440 --> 00:09:54,838
♪ It is all chill here ♪
262
00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:56,232
♪ We all eat krill here ♪
263
00:09:56,234 --> 00:09:57,375
I love krill.
264
00:09:57,377 --> 00:09:59,418
♪ Beneath the sea ♪
265
00:09:59,420 --> 00:10:02,118
♪ Beneath the sea ♪
266
00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:04,118
♪ No need to wash your hands ♪
267
00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:06,258
♪ You can just run them in the sands ♪
268
00:10:06,260 --> 00:10:08,018
- [LAUGHS]
- ♪ There are no bathrooms ♪
269
00:10:08,020 --> 00:10:11,031
♪ It's all a bathroom beneath the sea ♪
270
00:10:11,033 --> 00:10:12,505
Okay! I get it!
271
00:10:12,507 --> 00:10:14,037
There's poop everywhere!
272
00:10:16,970 --> 00:10:19,689
Look. That was a very
compelling argument,
273
00:10:19,691 --> 00:10:22,018
with impressive choreography,
274
00:10:22,020 --> 00:10:23,438
but I remain unconvinced.
275
00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:25,378
Well, how about this?
276
00:10:25,380 --> 00:10:26,938
If you don't get married,
277
00:10:26,940 --> 00:10:28,808
hundreds of thousands will die,
278
00:10:28,810 --> 00:10:31,148
and most likely lead to the extinction
279
00:10:31,150 --> 00:10:33,448
of two proud shark bloodlines.
280
00:10:33,450 --> 00:10:35,218
Okay, see, that feels like
281
00:10:35,220 --> 00:10:36,889
what the song should've been about.
282
00:10:36,891 --> 00:10:38,854
Mmm. It's more difficult
to find rhyming patterns
283
00:10:38,856 --> 00:10:39,988
with that subject matter.
284
00:10:39,990 --> 00:10:42,788
Okay, I'll consider marrying Tabitha,
285
00:10:42,790 --> 00:10:45,758
but only to stop the two
families from warring.
286
00:10:45,760 --> 00:10:48,328
Not because I can shit
anywhere in the ocean.
287
00:10:48,330 --> 00:10:50,028
Call the Federation.
288
00:10:50,030 --> 00:10:52,368
The wedding is on!
289
00:10:52,370 --> 00:10:53,868
[CHUCKLES]
290
00:10:53,870 --> 00:10:55,038
[GRUNTING]
291
00:10:55,040 --> 00:10:56,910
That's what I'm talkin' about.
292
00:11:00,228 --> 00:11:02,978
- _
- [ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING]
293
00:11:02,980 --> 00:11:04,448
[WOMEN CHEERING]
294
00:11:04,450 --> 00:11:07,078
Ladies of the Aeagean Islands!
295
00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:08,781
Put your hands together
296
00:11:08,783 --> 00:11:11,218
and welcome the God of War
297
00:11:11,220 --> 00:11:12,918
to the stage!
298
00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:13,988
[WHOOPING]
299
00:11:13,990 --> 00:11:15,528
Yeah, baby!
300
00:11:15,530 --> 00:11:18,228
Oh, my God!
301
00:11:18,230 --> 00:11:21,128
I can see the outline of his penis!
302
00:11:21,130 --> 00:11:22,868
[WHOOPING]
303
00:11:22,870 --> 00:11:25,538
This is the best night of my life!
304
00:11:25,540 --> 00:11:27,898
[YELLS]
305
00:11:27,900 --> 00:11:29,770
[MRS. FREEZE MOANING]
306
00:11:32,910 --> 00:11:36,448
Oh, shit! Cobb Squad reunion!
307
00:11:36,450 --> 00:11:38,178
Remember when you two met?
308
00:11:38,180 --> 00:11:40,178
Let's get "Cobb Squad" tattoos.
309
00:11:40,180 --> 00:11:41,981
Oh, my God, let's do that.
310
00:11:41,983 --> 00:11:44,288
- We're all getting matching tattoos!
- [CATWOMAN GROANS]
311
00:11:44,290 --> 00:11:45,888
I know you made everyone pretend to
312
00:11:45,890 --> 00:11:47,525
get along at the restaurant, you know,
313
00:11:47,527 --> 00:11:49,958
but, like, now they actually are.
314
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:52,655
You did that. You always
go the extra mile for me.
315
00:11:52,657 --> 00:11:54,158
I'm your best friend.
316
00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:55,400
You are my best friend.
317
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:58,150
[SNORING]
318
00:12:04,110 --> 00:12:05,595
Oh, shit.
319
00:12:05,597 --> 00:12:07,838
Piss cakes of a dick.
320
00:12:07,840 --> 00:12:09,448
[GROANS] All right, listen to me.
321
00:12:09,450 --> 00:12:11,348
We shouldn't have done this.
We should not have done this.
322
00:12:11,350 --> 00:12:13,878
The mind-blowing orgasmic
sex or the staying over?
323
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:15,007
[POISON IVY] The all of it.
324
00:12:15,009 --> 00:12:16,888
- The all of it.
- Right, of course. And, you know,
325
00:12:16,890 --> 00:12:18,438
we don't want it to happen again...
326
00:12:18,440 --> 00:12:20,488
No! No! No, we do not. Never.
327
00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:21,858
Obviously. That would be awkward
328
00:12:21,860 --> 00:12:23,558
and derail future plans. Plus, you know,
329
00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:25,790
- there's no room in the itinerary for...
- [DOOR OPENS]
330
00:12:28,328 --> 00:12:29,897
We made another mistake.
331
00:12:29,899 --> 00:12:31,398
No big deal, we were
drunk. We're friends!
332
00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:33,368
We have a working relationship.
We can get past this.
333
00:12:33,370 --> 00:12:35,454
- It's gonna be fine.
- Oh, good morning, Poison...
334
00:12:35,456 --> 00:12:37,238
- I need to get out of here.
- She needs to get out of here.
335
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:38,609
Wait, what? Are you... Are you sure?
336
00:12:38,611 --> 00:12:41,208
So sorry, but there's no
way off the island today.
337
00:12:41,210 --> 00:12:43,448
The invisible plane is out
picking up some investors.
338
00:12:43,450 --> 00:12:45,078
Well, is there an invisible boat?
339
00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:46,978
Or a visible boat? Is
there a fucking fisherman?
340
00:12:46,980 --> 00:12:48,378
- A trawler?
- Yes, look for boats.
341
00:12:48,380 --> 00:12:50,318
Oh, unfortunately, no.
[CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY]
342
00:12:50,320 --> 00:12:52,918
[SIGHS] Harley, I fucked up, okay?
343
00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:55,990
I will be in my room
until this weekend is over.
344
00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:59,860
[KING SHARK HUMMING]
345
00:13:03,430 --> 00:13:04,871
Huh?
346
00:13:04,873 --> 00:13:07,068
You wouldn't happen to be Tabitha?
347
00:13:07,070 --> 00:13:09,168
Yup. You must be my betrothed.
348
00:13:09,170 --> 00:13:10,530
I didn't think you'd show.
349
00:13:10,532 --> 00:13:12,278
Yeah, they came and found me.
350
00:13:12,280 --> 00:13:14,038
Then they sang me the song.
351
00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:15,208
Did they sing you the song?
352
00:13:15,210 --> 00:13:17,648
- I live the song.
- Wait.
353
00:13:17,650 --> 00:13:19,208
I'm picking up some vibes
354
00:13:19,210 --> 00:13:21,148
that maybe you don't
want to get married to me.
355
00:13:21,150 --> 00:13:22,189
What gave it away?
356
00:13:22,191 --> 00:13:23,755
The fact that I've
managed to chain-smoke
357
00:13:23,757 --> 00:13:25,088
even though I'm underwater?
358
00:13:25,090 --> 00:13:27,640
[FANFARE PLAYING]
359
00:13:32,630 --> 00:13:35,498
Son, you've finally come home.
360
00:13:35,500 --> 00:13:37,498
Hi, King Daddy.
361
00:13:37,500 --> 00:13:40,238
Now, let's get this show on the road.
362
00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:41,438
Where's the bride?
363
00:13:41,440 --> 00:13:44,138
Daddy, I have some bad news.
364
00:13:44,140 --> 00:13:46,038
She doesn't wanna get married.
365
00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:47,308
And neither do I.
366
00:13:47,310 --> 00:13:48,940
- What?
- [CROWD GASPS]
367
00:13:50,450 --> 00:13:52,118
Hmm. Wild night, huh?
368
00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:54,218
Oh. Nothing gets by your cat instincts.
369
00:13:54,220 --> 00:13:55,648
Or through paper-thin walls.
370
00:13:55,650 --> 00:13:57,148
I messed up.
371
00:13:57,150 --> 00:13:59,588
The feelings didn't go
away, now Ivy's upset.
372
00:13:59,590 --> 00:14:01,488
You've known her the
longest. What should I do?
373
00:14:01,490 --> 00:14:02,639
Don't look at me.
374
00:14:02,641 --> 00:14:04,888
- Jennifer's known her the longest.
- [JENNIFER GROANING]
375
00:14:04,890 --> 00:14:07,128
See you at brunch, Harls.
376
00:14:07,130 --> 00:14:09,018
[POISON IVY] I... I need
to be alone right now.
377
00:14:09,020 --> 00:14:11,968
Ivy, look. You're here,
you're queer, get used to it.
378
00:14:11,970 --> 00:14:13,568
Let's enjoy the rest of the weekend.
379
00:14:13,570 --> 00:14:16,108
Harley, that was a huge mistake, okay?
380
00:14:16,110 --> 00:14:18,721
And nothing like that
can ever happen again.
381
00:14:18,723 --> 00:14:21,078
Totally. Look, the first
time we'd just escaped jail.
382
00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:23,208
The second time we were
drunk. It's a two-time thing.
383
00:14:23,210 --> 00:14:25,178
Well, a four-time thing
within a two-time thing.
384
00:14:25,180 --> 00:14:27,085
[SIGHS] Look, your
friends came all this way
385
00:14:27,087 --> 00:14:28,318
to spend time with you.
386
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:30,548
Plus, I still have a
very fun surprise planned.
387
00:14:30,550 --> 00:14:32,418
The Crown Jewel of the weekend!
388
00:14:32,420 --> 00:14:35,318
Come on, Ive. The weekend
can't end like this.
389
00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:37,358
I wanted it to be perfect for you.
390
00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:39,560
We'll forget last night ever happened.
391
00:14:42,500 --> 00:14:43,968
Yeah, I... I'll come out.
392
00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:45,276
Let me just... Let me put on a bra.
393
00:14:45,278 --> 00:14:46,708
Here, it... it was in my room.
394
00:14:49,140 --> 00:14:52,278
[JENNIFER] Ugh. I'm so hungover.
395
00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:54,108
I need another mimosa, I think.
396
00:14:54,110 --> 00:14:56,478
All right, ladies, I
have a big surprise.
397
00:14:56,480 --> 00:14:58,178
Are we going back to the strip club?
398
00:14:58,180 --> 00:14:59,308
I left my fanny pack.
399
00:14:59,310 --> 00:15:00,548
No, someone stole it.
400
00:15:00,550 --> 00:15:02,218
Anyway, Eris, the hotel manager,
401
00:15:02,220 --> 00:15:04,218
is actually an enemy of the Amazons.
402
00:15:04,220 --> 00:15:05,418
She possessed the Queen,
403
00:15:05,420 --> 00:15:07,280
and is using her to sell Themyscira
404
00:15:07,282 --> 00:15:08,787
to Lex Luthor so he can put on
405
00:15:08,789 --> 00:15:11,228
an upscale lifestyle and music festival.
406
00:15:11,230 --> 00:15:13,158
He's already shipping
the port-a-potties.
407
00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:15,528
- And we're gonna kill Eris.
- Yes!
408
00:15:15,530 --> 00:15:17,198
Which will save this beautiful island
409
00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:19,168
and its natural resources.
410
00:15:19,170 --> 00:15:20,738
You know, environment shit.
411
00:15:20,740 --> 00:15:23,208
I've been scoping this out for weeks.
412
00:15:23,210 --> 00:15:24,538
- Yep. I love it.
- Really?
413
00:15:24,540 --> 00:15:25,968
Yes, obviously!
414
00:15:25,970 --> 00:15:27,478
Why didn't you tell us sooner, woman?
415
00:15:27,480 --> 00:15:30,008
I wanted you to enjoy
the spa facilities first.
416
00:15:30,010 --> 00:15:31,548
Yeah, night one we enjoy the resort,
417
00:15:31,550 --> 00:15:33,019
and night two we destroy it.
418
00:15:33,021 --> 00:15:35,318
Oh, my God. Harley, this
is so thoughtful of you.
419
00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:38,475
Like, it's exactly my
taste. It's like my thing.
420
00:15:38,477 --> 00:15:41,518
Murder? I don't know. I
work in life insurance.
421
00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:43,728
These are bottomless, right?
422
00:15:43,730 --> 00:15:45,900
Okay, let's kill her.
423
00:15:56,410 --> 00:15:57,738
What are you doing?
424
00:15:57,740 --> 00:15:59,678
What I should've done when I left...
425
00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:01,808
Finally standing up to my father.
426
00:16:01,810 --> 00:16:04,678
Dad, I've made a good life for myself.
427
00:16:04,680 --> 00:16:07,278
I have friends that I'm so important to
428
00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:11,088
they won't even finish a puzzle
they're working on until I get back.
429
00:16:11,090 --> 00:16:13,388
Do you understand that type of bond?
430
00:16:13,390 --> 00:16:16,288
So I will marry when I'm in love.
431
00:16:16,290 --> 00:16:20,158
No shark of mine marries for love.
432
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:21,498
I can't share a clamshell
433
00:16:21,500 --> 00:16:23,468
with someone who doesn't even know me.
434
00:16:23,470 --> 00:16:24,671
No offense, Tabitha.
435
00:16:24,673 --> 00:16:27,768
Uh, I don't wanna share
one with your ass either.
436
00:16:27,770 --> 00:16:29,438
Nanaue,
437
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:32,538
if you leave my kingdom again,
438
00:16:32,540 --> 00:16:36,308
you can never return.
439
00:16:36,310 --> 00:16:38,080
Then this is goodbye, Father.
440
00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:40,778
[GROWLS IN FRUSTRATION]
441
00:16:40,780 --> 00:16:42,518
And one last thing.
442
00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:44,855
I like pooping in the toilet!
443
00:16:44,857 --> 00:16:46,188
[CROWD GASPS]
444
00:16:46,190 --> 00:16:47,888
The shame of it.
445
00:16:47,890 --> 00:16:51,328
Ready to officially unite
Themyscira and LexCorp?
446
00:16:51,330 --> 00:16:53,528
Well, it's not like Wonder Woman's
gonna come and save them.
447
00:16:53,530 --> 00:16:55,898
I wish I could be there to
consummate this marriage in person,
448
00:16:55,900 --> 00:16:58,271
but... [GROANS] Little Lexi's sick.
449
00:16:58,273 --> 00:16:59,342
[LEXI COUGHS]
450
00:16:59,344 --> 00:17:02,508
Sign here, Queen, and
we'll all get rich.
451
00:17:02,510 --> 00:17:04,208
Well, everyone except you.
452
00:17:04,210 --> 00:17:05,408
[CHUCKLES]
453
00:17:05,410 --> 00:17:07,078
Aw, sad.
454
00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:08,338
- [POISON IVY] Hey!
- [ERIS] What the...
455
00:17:08,340 --> 00:17:10,308
Selling out the Amazons to Luthor?
456
00:17:10,310 --> 00:17:12,518
You're gonna have to
take that shit up with...
457
00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:14,780
The Cobb Squad!
458
00:17:16,420 --> 00:17:18,521
Wait, are you... Did
no one else get one?
459
00:17:18,523 --> 00:17:19,921
- Jennifer?
- Uh...
460
00:17:19,923 --> 00:17:21,623
[YELLS]
461
00:17:22,590 --> 00:17:24,840
[BOTH GRUNTING]
462
00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:35,908
[GROANS] You hit me in the tit.
463
00:17:35,910 --> 00:17:39,338
Sign here, date here. It's the 16th.
464
00:17:39,340 --> 00:17:40,840
- [JENNIFER GRUNTS]
- [SCREAMS]
465
00:17:42,750 --> 00:17:44,480
Eris, get the contract!
466
00:17:46,062 --> 00:17:47,931
[HARLEY GRUNTS]
467
00:17:47,933 --> 00:17:50,318
Harley on your right!
No, no, your other right!
468
00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:51,418
My right!
469
00:17:51,420 --> 00:17:52,791
How do I close this window?
470
00:17:52,793 --> 00:17:55,728
Ah! It's in full-screen
mode. Shit. [GROANS]
471
00:17:55,730 --> 00:17:58,788
Which HDMI port did you use?
472
00:17:58,790 --> 00:18:00,928
- [HARLEY GRUNTS]
- [JENNIFER PANTING]
473
00:18:00,930 --> 00:18:03,528
- [JENNIFER GRUNTS]
- [ERIS GROANS]
474
00:18:03,530 --> 00:18:06,328
This is for selling out
nature and women and...
475
00:18:06,330 --> 00:18:08,468
Not having bottomless mimosas.
476
00:18:08,470 --> 00:18:10,670
[PANTS]
477
00:18:13,540 --> 00:18:14,638
What happened?
478
00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:16,378
You were possessed by Eris.
479
00:18:16,380 --> 00:18:18,578
She turned your island into a resort.
480
00:18:18,580 --> 00:18:20,348
This is Themyscira?
481
00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:22,664
Yeah. And Harley Quinn saved the day.
482
00:18:22,666 --> 00:18:24,718
With the rest of the Cobb Squad.
483
00:18:24,720 --> 00:18:25,791
Very well.
484
00:18:25,793 --> 00:18:28,388
We shall celebrate the
Cobb Squad's victory
485
00:18:28,390 --> 00:18:30,661
in the ancient tradition of the Amazons.
486
00:18:30,663 --> 00:18:32,094
We're gonna have a fucking rager?
487
00:18:32,096 --> 00:18:35,127
We're going to have a fucking rager.
488
00:18:35,129 --> 00:18:37,329
- [WOMEN CHEERING]
- [JENNIFER WHOOPING]
489
00:18:38,270 --> 00:18:40,771
[BOTH GROAN]
490
00:18:40,773 --> 00:18:41,852
Are you having fun?
491
00:18:41,854 --> 00:18:44,368
I'm just glad you talked
me into coming back out.
492
00:18:44,370 --> 00:18:47,408
You know, it's like, aside
from the horrible mistake
493
00:18:47,410 --> 00:18:50,548
that we made earlier, this
has been my dream vacation.
494
00:18:50,550 --> 00:18:53,878
I mean, relaxation, partying, murder.
495
00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:55,318
I mean, man,
496
00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:57,288
you know me better than anyone.
497
00:18:57,290 --> 00:18:58,648
You're easy to celebrate.
498
00:18:58,650 --> 00:19:00,920
And you're fun to celebrate with.
499
00:19:02,660 --> 00:19:04,010
[SNORING]
500
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:10,495
- Oh, shit, fuck!
- Oh, double fuck.
501
00:19:10,497 --> 00:19:12,698
Oh, for the ding of fuck nuts!
502
00:19:12,700 --> 00:19:14,838
I can't... What is wro...
503
00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:16,538
How can I fuckin'...
504
00:19:16,540 --> 00:19:18,778
Oh, my God. We have talked about this.
505
00:19:18,780 --> 00:19:20,778
We cannot do this again.
506
00:19:20,780 --> 00:19:22,748
We just said that we weren't gonna
do it and then we did it again.
507
00:19:22,750 --> 00:19:23,848
You're right. You're totally right.
508
00:19:23,850 --> 00:19:25,718
We can't do this. We can't...
509
00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:27,578
Wait, why can't we do this?
510
00:19:27,580 --> 00:19:29,048
Because you're my best friend,
511
00:19:29,050 --> 00:19:31,418
and I can't stand the
idea of losing you.
512
00:19:31,420 --> 00:19:33,718
- You know? I...
- You don't have to.
513
00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:35,658
We'd be closer than
we've ever been before.
514
00:19:35,660 --> 00:19:37,328
Well, not closer than last night,
515
00:19:37,330 --> 00:19:39,288
- I mean, that was crazy.
- Yeah, that was fucking crazy.
516
00:19:39,290 --> 00:19:41,298
Don't you want to feel
this way all the time?
517
00:19:41,300 --> 00:19:43,035
Our whole lives could
be going around the world
518
00:19:43,037 --> 00:19:45,868
saving nature, freeing
all-female armies,
519
00:19:45,870 --> 00:19:47,998
partying, getting free stuff.
520
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,968
It would be so fun!
521
00:19:49,970 --> 00:19:50,970
I love you.
522
00:19:51,980 --> 00:19:55,870
Just think about it, okay?
523
00:19:58,750 --> 00:20:00,578
[CLAYFACE] Ooh, one hour till we dock.
524
00:20:00,580 --> 00:20:02,751
I bet we can finish the puzzle.
525
00:20:02,753 --> 00:20:04,518
- Hey!
- No one touches another piece
526
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:06,458
until King Shark gets back!
527
00:20:06,460 --> 00:20:07,488
Nobody. I mean it!
528
00:20:07,490 --> 00:20:08,888
I can't wait to see Ivy.
529
00:20:08,890 --> 00:20:10,788
Ah, I wonder what she'll
complain about first.
530
00:20:10,790 --> 00:20:12,898
Probably the airplane food.
531
00:20:12,900 --> 00:20:15,358
God, she is one in a million.
532
00:20:15,360 --> 00:20:18,398
Wow. You certainly share
a unique connection.
533
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,441
[KING SHARK ROARS]
534
00:20:20,443 --> 00:20:23,214
The King hath returned!
535
00:20:23,216 --> 00:20:25,329
So you stood up to your dad? That rules.
536
00:20:25,331 --> 00:20:27,508
I looked him right
in the eye and I said,
537
00:20:27,510 --> 00:20:30,711
"Daddy, I'm not marrying Tabitha".
538
00:20:30,713 --> 00:20:31,884
Good for you.
539
00:20:31,886 --> 00:20:34,778
A man is nothing
without his convictions.
540
00:20:34,780 --> 00:20:36,088
Exactly.
541
00:20:36,090 --> 00:20:38,056
And then, a couple minutes after that
542
00:20:38,058 --> 00:20:39,858
I came back and got married.
543
00:20:39,860 --> 00:20:42,428
What? I can't say no to King Daddy.
544
00:20:42,430 --> 00:20:45,588
But at least now he knows
I'm not happy about it.
545
00:20:45,590 --> 00:20:49,728
Wait. You got married
to someone you just met?
546
00:20:49,730 --> 00:20:51,995
She didn't reject you over and over?
547
00:20:51,997 --> 00:20:53,598
How many times did you propose?
548
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:55,598
I think... none?
549
00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:57,538
- What?
- Tabitha and I worked it out.
550
00:20:57,540 --> 00:20:59,108
We'll stay married publicly,
551
00:20:59,110 --> 00:21:01,708
but we're each allowed to
have secret relationships.
552
00:21:01,710 --> 00:21:04,608
I mean, sure, we could
probably get along
553
00:21:04,610 --> 00:21:06,378
and have a very milquetoast marriage,
554
00:21:06,380 --> 00:21:08,421
but I don't want that.
555
00:21:08,423 --> 00:21:10,488
I wanna be with someone who excites me.
556
00:21:10,490 --> 00:21:11,958
Where love isn't safe,
557
00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:14,818
the kind of love that
doesn't have limits.
558
00:21:14,820 --> 00:21:16,388
I want a soulmate.
559
00:21:16,390 --> 00:21:17,628
Just like me and Ivy.
560
00:21:17,630 --> 00:21:18,630
[CLAYFACE] Mmm.
561
00:21:19,590 --> 00:21:21,028
[HARLEY] Bye!
562
00:21:21,030 --> 00:21:23,168
Jennifer! Welcome home, honey.
563
00:21:23,170 --> 00:21:24,768
[SHUSHES] Stop.
564
00:21:24,770 --> 00:21:26,738
I'm going by Jen now, okay?
565
00:21:26,740 --> 00:21:27,798
Okay. [STAMMERS] What...
566
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:29,138
What happened on that trip?
567
00:21:29,140 --> 00:21:31,868
[MRS. FREEZE] I can't
wait to get you home.
568
00:21:31,870 --> 00:21:32,978
[CHUCKLES]
569
00:21:32,980 --> 00:21:34,808
Ooh! Stop.
570
00:21:34,810 --> 00:21:37,408
[CAR SQUEAKING]
571
00:21:37,410 --> 00:21:39,448
[EXHALES] Okay, I've
thought about what you said.
572
00:21:39,450 --> 00:21:41,648
And this weekend was so special.
573
00:21:41,650 --> 00:21:43,688
Amazing, really.
574
00:21:43,690 --> 00:21:47,388
And you're right, that we have
had these high highs together.
575
00:21:47,390 --> 00:21:48,728
But... [SIGHS] Harley,
576
00:21:48,730 --> 00:21:50,888
you run from one thing to the next,
577
00:21:50,890 --> 00:21:53,798
and at some point that's gonna be me.
578
00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:55,798
And the truth is,
579
00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:57,968
I trust you with my life,
580
00:21:57,970 --> 00:22:01,798
but I don't trust you with my heart.
581
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:04,310
So, I... I'm marrying Kite Man.
582
00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:08,008
Hey, girl. How was the trip?
583
00:22:08,010 --> 00:22:09,209
It... it was good.
584
00:22:09,211 --> 00:22:10,608
Hey, you wanna go make some chili,
585
00:22:10,610 --> 00:22:12,408
sit on the couch watching TV
586
00:22:12,410 --> 00:22:14,480
for four to six hours?
587
00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:20,420
[CRIES]
588
00:22:24,578 --> 00:22:27,578
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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