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1
00:02:34,790 --> 00:02:36,360
Hello!
2
00:02:44,095 --> 00:02:45,328
Hello!
3
00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:34,378
How many times did I have to defend my needs,
the ones I neglected all those years.
4
00:03:38,016 --> 00:03:38,983
First to myself...
5
00:03:40,051 --> 00:03:43,487
because I thought that no one
could deal with it.
6
00:03:48,993 --> 00:03:54,031
I had gotten used to his vanilla sex and
assumed it was the standard way.
7
00:03:56,034 --> 00:03:58,302
I thought something was wrong with me...
8
00:03:58,904 --> 00:04:03,240
because I was into other things
than other people.
9
00:04:20,925 --> 00:04:23,995
I can get ready and make plans...
10
00:04:24,996 --> 00:04:29,733
while nobody is looking
or asking me why.
11
00:04:44,349 --> 00:04:50,254
If I don't give in to my urges
things will just get worse for me.
12
00:04:50,589 --> 00:04:53,524
It will all get more confusing.
13
00:05:31,997 --> 00:05:35,899
I remember the first time
I was invited to a party...
14
00:05:40,038 --> 00:05:46,241
It took more time to think up an alibi to
get out of the house then the party itself.
15
00:05:56,588 --> 00:06:00,923
The scent of my perfume he knows so well...
16
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:06,129
Not for him and he wasn't supposed to know.
17
00:06:08,366 --> 00:06:10,534
I lied like a rug.
18
00:06:11,903 --> 00:06:14,338
That night I was soaring.
19
00:06:16,207 --> 00:06:21,946
I felt such overpowering love for
the orgy and all the men who wanted me. .
20
00:06:24,950 --> 00:06:27,151
It brought tears to my eyes.
21
00:06:30,021 --> 00:06:35,225
One man even whispered to me.
If you want to go, just go.
22
00:06:35,293 --> 00:06:38,028
And he promised to take me home
like a gentleman.
23
00:06:38,029 --> 00:06:40,898
Sweet, but unnecessary.
24
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:44,768
For days I wanted to cry and fuck.
25
00:06:46,071 --> 00:06:49,974
I think I'm good at crying and fucking.
26
00:06:51,042 --> 00:06:55,244
In lying and having a double life.
27
00:06:57,149 --> 00:07:00,384
And if you ask me if I want to stop...
28
00:07:02,721 --> 00:07:04,455
Well, no.
29
00:07:13,932 --> 00:07:14,932
Hello!
30
00:07:51,369 --> 00:07:53,571
Let me out!
31
00:09:53,091 --> 00:09:54,591
What time is it?
32
00:10:02,393 --> 00:10:03,627
Still early.
33
00:10:07,038 --> 00:10:10,840
What are you doing?
Come on.
34
00:10:12,010 --> 00:10:13,043
A quickie!
35
00:10:14,779 --> 00:10:16,146
I have to shave.
36
00:10:19,184 --> 00:10:20,951
Another time okay?
37
00:10:30,094 --> 00:10:33,063
Why do you always pick such weird moments?
38
00:11:02,527 --> 00:11:05,229
I hope I'm getting a copy of this?
39
00:12:20,071 --> 00:12:20,871
Hi Gaya.
40
00:12:22,707 --> 00:12:24,174
No it's fine.
41
00:12:26,611 --> 00:12:27,478
Now?
42
00:12:30,048 --> 00:12:32,582
In the teachers' lounge he sits near me.
43
00:12:33,051 --> 00:12:36,019
He always has coffee with cream...
and a cheese sandwich.
44
00:12:37,355 --> 00:12:38,822
He's a math teacher.
45
00:12:38,923 --> 00:12:42,325
He has such lovely eyes, so warm.
46
00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:44,928
And obviously a big slide rule.
47
00:12:45,930 --> 00:12:46,930
Jeez, Stella.
48
00:12:46,931 --> 00:12:50,734
Heck, just go sit across from him
next time.
49
00:12:50,836 --> 00:12:53,270
Is he married?
How would I know?
50
00:12:56,114 --> 00:12:56,914
No!
51
00:12:58,209 --> 00:13:01,611
Am I the only one here who gets a bit
tired of all this adulterous behavior?
52
00:13:02,814 --> 00:13:06,717
Jeez Lau. Let Quinty flirt a bit.
What difference does it make?
53
00:13:06,718 --> 00:13:07,785
I wasn't even flirting.
54
00:13:09,754 --> 00:13:12,623
Sweety... go ahead and enjoy it.
55
00:13:12,658 --> 00:13:14,892
What's wrong with a little attention?
Hmm?
56
00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:24,267
What choices are you planning to make?
57
00:13:25,737 --> 00:13:28,305
Choices, that's when you lose
friends and family.
58
00:13:29,941 --> 00:13:32,676
Yes, I understand what you mean,
but put that aside for now.
59
00:13:34,245 --> 00:13:37,314
Well, I would like...
60
00:13:38,083 --> 00:13:42,419
to be liked. I want to be able to
share without being attached.
61
00:14:06,744 --> 00:14:09,479
Let me out of here!
62
00:14:28,834 --> 00:14:35,272
That conflict. I'd just had my first one
night stand and l was chatting online...
63
00:14:36,041 --> 00:14:41,812
But with each sound I went offline |
because I was terrified to get caught.
64
00:14:41,980 --> 00:14:47,684
That Vincent would know.
Even when I was making small talk.
65
00:14:49,554 --> 00:14:54,525
Yet a week later I was off fucking
my brains out in a hotel room.
66
00:14:55,827 --> 00:14:59,263
So something overcame my fear
of getting caught.
67
00:15:00,098 --> 00:15:03,901
Maybe the fear is not about
your husband or over loss.
68
00:15:04,603 --> 00:15:09,840
Well what then? I was terrified
that Vincent would find out.
69
00:15:10,041 --> 00:15:13,777
Because he'd figure out what
you're doing... what you are.
70
00:15:13,812 --> 00:15:14,878
Yes.
71
00:15:16,948 --> 00:15:21,785
Maybe you were afraid of recognizing
it yourself? What you're doing.
72
00:16:08,433 --> 00:16:09,467
You're home early.
73
00:16:17,408 --> 00:16:19,844
I don't know what to say.
74
00:16:25,750 --> 00:16:26,817
Sweetie
75
00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:33,123
I really want to promise you that this
won't happen again and that I'll change...
76
00:16:34,459 --> 00:16:36,193
But I can‘t.
77
00:16:37,296 --> 00:16:39,063
Fuck you Stella!
78
00:16:40,131 --> 00:16:42,666
What am I supposed to do?
79
00:16:44,235 --> 00:16:46,737
Pretend to be someone else?
Ignore my feelings?
80
00:16:46,738 --> 00:16:50,708
How about taking my feelings into account.
We swore to be faithful remember?
81
00:16:51,309 --> 00:16:54,278
Sweetie, I am faithful to you.
82
00:16:54,913 --> 00:17:00,783
I'm faithful in sharing my vulnerabilities
and my fears and my secrets.
83
00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:03,421
Apparently not all your secrets.
84
00:17:04,489 --> 00:17:06,990
No.
Not all of them.
85
00:17:12,330 --> 00:17:13,665
You don't even look at me anymore.
86
00:17:15,400 --> 00:17:16,834
Not the way you used to.
87
00:17:20,905 --> 00:17:23,673
How long has it been since we fucked?
88
00:17:23,741 --> 00:17:25,676
I mean really fucked?
89
00:17:27,946 --> 00:17:30,181
I feel like a caged bird.
90
00:17:38,556 --> 00:17:40,524
So that's it?
91
00:18:23,802 --> 00:18:24,836
Hey!
92
00:18:56,870 --> 00:18:58,604
Goddammit you asshole.
93
00:19:39,244 --> 00:19:41,779
Let me out Goddammit!
94
00:20:03,034 --> 00:20:06,804
Will you guys go to that opening next week?
Otherwise I'll die of boredom.
95
00:20:06,906 --> 00:20:09,808
Sure, as long as there are drinks.
The other girls will come too.
96
00:20:09,809 --> 00:20:10,876
All our events are catered.
97
00:20:10,945 --> 00:20:13,413
Good concept. Eating and doing business.
98
00:20:13,581 --> 00:20:15,816
What's the main attraction?
99
00:20:16,885 --> 00:20:18,619
What's the punishment for
dropping your bread?
100
00:20:23,355 --> 00:20:25,689
Caning is so ancient Rome.
101
00:20:28,893 --> 00:20:29,893
His jacket?
102
00:20:30,028 --> 00:20:33,197
We have the Lady of Mogilev.
Can you believe it?
103
00:20:33,198 --> 00:20:35,299
It's an icon from Russia.
104
00:20:35,834 --> 00:20:38,902
For years it was collecting dust
in moldy storage rooms...
105
00:20:39,104 --> 00:20:42,839
and they had no money to
restore the museums.
106
00:20:42,907 --> 00:20:46,243
Since the Wall fell,
they were allowed to sell.
107
00:20:46,244 --> 00:20:49,312
Did you know the virgin Mary
was the most popular in Russian art?
108
00:20:49,314 --> 00:20:51,782
What's with that worship of virgins?
109
00:20:51,817 --> 00:20:54,185
You can't worship an Icon.
You can honor it.
110
00:20:54,886 --> 00:20:57,587
I didn't know you were in to art?
111
00:20:58,690 --> 00:21:03,026
They say that when an Icon stops being
honored, the gold begins to peel off.
112
00:21:07,098 --> 00:21:08,332
Are you sure?
113
00:21:08,634 --> 00:21:09,700
Yes.
114
00:21:11,302 --> 00:21:13,270
You are the only ones I thought of.
115
00:21:15,106 --> 00:21:18,609
The tension is killing Luca.
I've never seen him so nervous.
116
00:21:19,711 --> 00:21:20,911
And what about you?
117
00:21:21,479 --> 00:21:22,513
Scared to death.
118
00:21:23,181 --> 00:21:24,649
And excited!
119
00:21:27,252 --> 00:21:28,986
So what's next?
120
00:21:29,421 --> 00:21:32,323
Well it's regular sauna.
We'll get used to each other...
121
00:21:32,358 --> 00:21:35,927
and take it from there.
122
00:21:35,996 --> 00:21:40,832
I won't force it.
Our friendship is too important.
123
00:21:51,309 --> 00:21:52,810
Thanks.
124
00:23:40,652 --> 00:23:42,886
I'm sorry but I can't do this.
125
00:23:49,060 --> 00:23:51,795
I'm so sorry.
126
00:24:00,705 --> 00:24:02,439
That's a real shame.
127
00:24:16,554 --> 00:24:18,355
When did you first feel caged?
128
00:24:18,823 --> 00:24:24,928
When I realized that Vincent wasn't
the man I thought he was.
129
00:24:26,564 --> 00:24:29,333
He'd fallen from his pedestal.
130
00:24:29,735 --> 00:24:32,970
That sounds harsh.
I don't mean it that way.
131
00:24:33,906 --> 00:24:37,142
But it made me think...
132
00:24:38,309 --> 00:24:40,811
and it stirred up something in me.
133
00:24:41,947 --> 00:24:42,947
It was...
134
00:24:44,049 --> 00:24:46,350
Something warm from deep in my belly...
135
00:24:46,485 --> 00:24:50,187
And spreading lower.
I mean really physical.
136
00:24:51,289 --> 00:24:56,026
And I couldn't resist It or apologize
for it. This literally happened.
137
00:29:31,869 --> 00:29:32,937
Who are you?
138
00:29:35,841 --> 00:29:37,341
Christine.
139
00:29:38,476 --> 00:29:39,944
I'm Stella.
140
00:29:42,513 --> 00:29:45,515
Could you tell who brought you here?
Did you see him?
141
00:29:49,154 --> 00:29:50,321
I was in my car.
142
00:29:51,689 --> 00:29:53,657
I got out in front of my house...
143
00:29:59,030 --> 00:30:01,265
And after that I can't remember anything.
144
00:30:03,835 --> 00:30:04,902
Hello?
145
00:30:05,170 --> 00:30:06,237
That's useless.
146
00:30:08,973 --> 00:30:10,440
Who's doing this?
147
00:30:10,475 --> 00:30:11,509
No idea.
148
00:30:12,111 --> 00:30:13,578
I've got no idea.
149
00:30:16,047 --> 00:30:18,282
We need to find a way to get out of here.
150
00:30:25,090 --> 00:30:26,590
Maybe it's some kind of joke.
151
00:30:27,559 --> 00:30:30,594
A joke?
Yes. Maybe?
152
00:30:30,629 --> 00:30:34,097
I've been here five days already.
This is definitely not a joke.
153
00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:36,667
Five?
154
00:31:03,761 --> 00:31:04,828
We need to wait.
155
00:31:05,730 --> 00:31:07,431
Wait for the right moment.
156
00:31:36,161 --> 00:31:38,362
We need to sleep in shifts.
157
00:31:40,465 --> 00:31:43,934
Last time he grabbed me in my sleep.
I don't want that to happen again.
158
00:31:49,677 --> 00:31:50,944
Wait!
159
00:31:52,345 --> 00:31:53,846
Holy shit!
160
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:10,961
You've got a cell phone?
161
00:32:20,438 --> 00:32:22,172
Fuck.
What?
162
00:32:22,907 --> 00:32:24,641
No signal of course.
163
00:32:51,437 --> 00:32:53,638
Of course he knew this would happen.
164
00:32:55,340 --> 00:32:59,076
He's mind fucking me.
Please stop swearing.
165
00:33:03,314 --> 00:33:04,482
I'm so wound up.
166
00:33:06,885 --> 00:33:08,886
I couldn't possibly sleep right now.
167
00:33:11,957 --> 00:33:13,424
Go ahead and sleep.
168
00:33:14,892 --> 00:33:17,594
If something happens
you'd be the first to know.
169
00:33:22,495 --> 00:33:24,362
She asked if we're having a good time.
170
00:33:24,806 --> 00:33:26,840
My English sucks.
171
00:33:43,588 --> 00:33:45,589
I do talk a little Dutch.
172
00:33:48,493 --> 00:33:51,262
My brother in law has just
come over from Russia.
173
00:33:53,398 --> 00:33:56,600
My wife's lived here for years.
Every year he comes to visit.
174
00:33:56,635 --> 00:33:58,836
We thought this would be a fun night out.
175
00:34:05,510 --> 00:34:07,544
And you? Are you here
with your husband?
176
00:34:08,613 --> 00:34:12,582
If I was I wouldn't be standing
here talking to you.
177
00:34:12,617 --> 00:34:15,419
Oh? What's wrong with a
little friendly conversation?
178
00:34:15,453 --> 00:34:17,421
Nothing at all.
179
00:34:17,456 --> 00:34:20,190
But try explaining that to my husband.
180
00:34:20,325 --> 00:34:22,092
Yeah, and my wife.
181
00:34:22,927 --> 00:34:24,395
Where is she anyway?
182
00:34:25,029 --> 00:34:29,466
Why do we need permission from others
when things feel right?
183
00:34:31,836 --> 00:34:34,338
But that ends right here.
184
00:35:15,947 --> 00:35:16,981
You want it all.
185
00:35:17,949 --> 00:35:21,285
You want love and attention
from one person...
186
00:35:21,353 --> 00:35:24,855
and sex and adventures
with all the others.
187
00:35:25,557 --> 00:35:28,292
Is that so bad?
Wicked?
188
00:35:29,194 --> 00:35:32,063
Am I a bad and wicked woman
and am | doomed?
189
00:35:32,064 --> 00:35:33,899
No, no. I'm not judging.
190
00:35:34,500 --> 00:35:37,268
I'm just observing.
191
00:35:39,204 --> 00:35:41,171
Maybe I'm too greedy.
192
00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:45,976
If I make love with someone I care about,
then I make love with him.
193
00:35:46,444 --> 00:35:50,047
If I have sex with a stranger
I have sex with myself.
194
00:35:51,349 --> 00:35:56,620
I use my body. I feel everything
and I conquer myself.
195
00:35:58,323 --> 00:36:02,292
My... My liberation is part sexual...
196
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:05,095
but is not just sex.
197
00:36:05,997 --> 00:36:09,133
It was like taking off a straitjacket.
198
00:36:10,501 --> 00:36:11,769
And when it came off...
199
00:36:12,003 --> 00:36:15,339
instead a frightened girl a
strong woman appeared.
200
00:36:15,941 --> 00:36:18,442
A complete metamorphosis.
201
00:36:29,918 --> 00:36:31,886
Christine?
202
00:36:34,359 --> 00:36:36,360
Christine!
203
00:36:37,898 --> 00:36:39,865
Goddammit!
204
00:36:39,902 --> 00:36:42,370
Asshole. Son of a bitch!
205
00:37:06,859 --> 00:37:08,593
I've been thinking.
206
00:37:12,997 --> 00:37:17,801
I called John and I can stay
with him for a while.
207
00:39:43,850 --> 00:39:47,352
I noticed you on the SDD site.
208
00:39:50,055 --> 00:39:51,088
SDD?
209
00:39:52,090 --> 00:39:55,325
Nice photos.
Nice profile.
210
00:39:58,663 --> 00:40:02,099
How did you see the pictures.
You have to be a paying member...
211
00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:03,600
Yep.
212
00:40:05,203 --> 00:40:06,203
True.
213
00:40:06,605 --> 00:40:10,206
Et tu Judy?
214
00:40:12,744 --> 00:40:14,745
What's your name on SDD?
215
00:40:15,313 --> 00:40:17,047
Madelief 69.
216
00:40:17,316 --> 00:40:19,317
Not the year you're born is it?
217
00:40:24,055 --> 00:40:26,323
I'd be fun to get together sometime.
218
00:40:27,726 --> 00:40:29,426
Who knows?
219
00:40:30,862 --> 00:40:33,597
Judy, can you come in for a moment.
220
00:40:51,583 --> 00:40:54,317
Have a good weekend.
See you on Monday.
221
00:40:54,653 --> 00:40:57,655
Could you turn all the lights off when
you leave and don't forget the alarm.
222
00:40:58,089 --> 00:41:00,591
Will do. Have a good weekend.
223
00:41:13,071 --> 00:41:15,572
I've been thinking of you all day.
224
00:41:17,442 --> 00:41:18,943
And I want to confess something.
225
00:41:21,212 --> 00:41:22,212
oh?
226
00:41:24,649 --> 00:41:26,551
I am a member of the site...
227
00:41:28,719 --> 00:41:30,454
but I've never been to a club before.
228
00:41:31,022 --> 00:41:33,257
You want me to take you
with me sometime?
229
00:41:35,660 --> 00:41:36,694
Yes.
230
00:41:37,062 --> 00:41:39,029
I don‘t know if that's
such a good idea.
231
00:41:41,299 --> 00:41:43,801
We have to see each other
every day at work.
232
00:41:52,644 --> 00:41:53,878
Am I attractive enough?
233
00:41:55,914 --> 00:41:57,315
You are a beautiful woman.
234
00:41:58,383 --> 00:41:59,850
That's not the problem.
235
00:42:02,153 --> 00:42:03,454
Nobody has to know.
236
00:42:05,891 --> 00:42:06,958
I mean...
237
00:42:07,926 --> 00:42:10,327
who would I tell anyway?
238
00:43:06,651 --> 00:43:09,353
I slept great.
239
00:43:11,156 --> 00:43:13,457
Not quite enough of course.
240
00:43:15,393 --> 00:43:16,894
Come...
241
00:43:18,163 --> 00:43:19,630
No.
242
00:43:22,767 --> 00:43:24,234
Is something wrong?
243
00:43:27,806 --> 00:43:29,840
No, but I think you should go.
244
00:43:30,041 --> 00:43:31,042
Jeez”.
245
00:43:31,610 --> 00:43:33,578
Can I have a minute to wake up?
246
00:43:33,713 --> 00:43:34,946
Of course.
247
00:43:40,852 --> 00:43:43,086
The coffee is ready downstairs.
248
00:43:46,858 --> 00:43:48,692
Where do you want this to go?
249
00:43:50,462 --> 00:43:51,462
To go?
250
00:43:52,764 --> 00:43:54,198
With our relationship?
251
00:44:10,715 --> 00:44:13,217
Stella? Get in here!
252
00:44:14,352 --> 00:44:15,853
Of course.
253
00:44:21,993 --> 00:44:23,828
And shut that door.
254
00:45:14,145 --> 00:45:18,014
It's okay. You're back.
255
00:45:35,867 --> 00:45:37,100
It's okay.
256
00:45:37,269 --> 00:45:40,504
I'm fine. I'm fine.
257
00:45:43,708 --> 00:45:45,209
Just one more minute.
258
00:45:52,584 --> 00:45:54,251
He made me come.
259
00:45:55,153 --> 00:45:56,754
I didn't want to.
260
00:45:59,190 --> 00:46:00,791
I just...
261
00:46:02,160 --> 00:46:04,127
stopped resisting.
262
00:46:08,966 --> 00:46:10,700
Goddamit.
263
00:46:11,770 --> 00:46:13,438
Oh, I'm sorry.
264
00:46:21,246 --> 00:46:24,614
And now all I can think about is those
stupid magazine surveys.
265
00:46:25,950 --> 00:46:28,919
'What's the most exciting place you did it?"
266
00:46:35,830 --> 00:46:37,297
No!
267
00:47:31,516 --> 00:47:33,017
Are you okay?
268
00:47:35,720 --> 00:47:37,187
No one is coming to help us.
269
00:47:37,522 --> 00:47:39,023
What?
270
00:47:41,026 --> 00:47:42,493
Why would you think that?
271
00:47:44,862 --> 00:47:46,863
My husband is definitely
looking for me.
272
00:47:53,171 --> 00:47:55,172
What's your husband's name?
273
00:47:56,674 --> 00:47:58,142
Vincent.
274
00:47:58,810 --> 00:48:00,778
And he doesn't miss you?
275
00:48:01,980 --> 00:48:03,213
No.
276
00:48:04,515 --> 00:48:06,516
I don‘t think so, no.
277
00:48:06,551 --> 00:48:12,055
Why is that?
You've been gone for days already.
278
00:48:14,025 --> 00:48:18,262
Things aren't going so great between us.
He's staying with a friend.
279
00:48:21,900 --> 00:48:23,401
Is he with someone else?
280
00:48:24,769 --> 00:48:26,003
No.
281
00:48:27,505 --> 00:48:28,739
Are you?
282
00:48:29,674 --> 00:48:31,175
No.
283
00:48:31,210 --> 00:48:32,443
Not really.
284
00:48:34,613 --> 00:48:35,846
Not really?
285
00:48:39,384 --> 00:48:42,653
Not with any ONE.
It's a long story.
286
00:48:49,227 --> 00:48:51,228
Is that why you broke up?
287
00:48:52,097 --> 00:48:55,098
What?
Well what you just said.
288
00:48:55,400 --> 00:48:56,934
Not any ONE.
289
00:48:58,270 --> 00:49:00,237
You have lots of lovers?
290
00:49:01,206 --> 00:49:03,941
Lovers is a big word.
291
00:49:06,111 --> 00:49:07,578
Don't you feel guilty?
292
00:49:09,514 --> 00:49:12,349
There's nothing I can do about it.
I sure have tried.
293
00:49:14,119 --> 00:49:15,586
I couldn't do that.
294
00:49:16,721 --> 00:49:20,791
Let's talk about something else.
How do we get out of here for example.
295
00:49:20,859 --> 00:49:22,593
What do you suggest?
296
00:49:24,662 --> 00:49:27,397
We need to make sure that he's alone.
Excuse me?
297
00:49:28,900 --> 00:49:32,102
I think he's not alone.
Why would you think that?
298
00:49:34,272 --> 00:49:36,240
Just a feeling.
299
00:55:21,653 --> 00:55:22,653
Are you okay?
300
00:55:25,290 --> 00:55:27,057
Yeah, I think so.
301
00:55:29,961 --> 00:55:31,428
I put your clothes on for you.
302
00:55:32,964 --> 00:55:34,698
You were pretty out of it.
303
00:55:34,699 --> 00:55:36,700
He slipped me something.
304
00:55:38,436 --> 00:55:39,503
What?
305
00:55:40,205 --> 00:55:42,940
NO idea
It looked like G.
306
00:55:43,608 --> 00:55:44,675
" G " ??
307
00:55:46,044 --> 00:55:48,612
GHB. The drug.
308
00:55:50,215 --> 00:55:52,849
How would you know?
309
00:56:08,399 --> 00:56:09,399
Hey...
310
00:56:13,104 --> 00:56:15,305
He said that I'm here because of you.
311
00:56:16,174 --> 00:56:18,041
Did he say something to you?
312
00:56:19,344 --> 00:56:20,610
Yes.
313
00:56:22,113 --> 00:56:24,348
He said: if you're wondering you're here...
314
00:56:24,349 --> 00:56:26,584
try asking your little friend.
315
00:56:30,255 --> 00:56:32,990
If he doesn't talk to me
it must mean I know him.
316
00:56:35,994 --> 00:56:38,729
Can you think where
you've been lately?
317
00:56:40,198 --> 00:56:42,667
He's afraid I'll recognize him.
318
00:56:45,070 --> 00:56:46,537
Think.
319
00:56:48,140 --> 00:56:50,141
Maybe one of your dates?
320
00:56:53,811 --> 00:56:57,547
How many men have you fucked lately?
And then dumped?
321
00:56:57,616 --> 00:56:58,715
My God.
322
00:57:02,754 --> 00:57:05,089
Sure, now God is there to help you.
323
00:57:05,890 --> 00:57:07,391
Think!
324
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:12,396
Have you made enemies somewhere?
Do you have stalkers?
325
00:57:12,565 --> 00:57:14,032
Think!
326
00:57:23,408 --> 00:57:25,142
You here?
Yes.
327
00:57:27,645 --> 00:57:28,946
How's work?
328
00:57:30,284 --> 00:57:31,448
I miss you.
329
00:57:32,901 --> 00:57:35,853
Yes... eh... Judy.
About last time...
330
00:57:36,422 --> 00:57:41,191
It's not that I regret what we did,
but I think it's best if we leave it be.
331
00:57:42,830 --> 00:57:45,629
Just take some time to think about it.
332
00:57:46,593 --> 00:57:48,533
Well I don't think...
Now that Vincent's gone...
333
00:57:49,901 --> 00:57:52,236
I wanted to ask you if I
could come by tonight.
334
00:57:53,667 --> 00:57:55,739
I don't think that's a good idea.
335
00:57:57,999 --> 00:58:01,191
You can't just use me like this.
Excuse me?
336
00:58:01,727 --> 00:58:05,414
Why don't you answer my text messages?
Judy, let's not make...
337
00:58:05,477 --> 00:58:07,886
You used me and dumped me.
338
00:58:08,454 --> 00:58:11,456
If you really want to talk about it,
can we please do this somewhere else?
339
00:58:12,060 --> 00:58:15,492
You really hurt me.
Right.
340
00:58:15,980 --> 00:58:17,995
I'm on my way to a birthday party.
341
00:58:25,451 --> 00:58:26,510
Goddamit.
342
00:58:27,922 --> 00:58:28,928
What?
343
00:58:29,623 --> 00:58:30,714
He took my wedding ring.
344
00:58:31,030 --> 00:58:33,614
l have people who care about me bitch!
345
00:58:33,895 --> 00:58:37,288
And now there's a man molesting me
because you've something to hide.
346
00:58:37,313 --> 00:58:38,326
Stop it!
347
00:58:38,327 --> 00:58:40,118
Do you think I want this?
348
00:58:49,875 --> 00:58:51,267
This is what he wants.
349
00:58:52,772 --> 00:58:56,113
He wants a front row seat for
seeing how we tear each other apart.
350
00:58:56,125 --> 00:58:57,778
You have to tell me more.
351
00:59:03,106 --> 00:59:04,817
I beg you.
352
00:59:08,746 --> 00:59:11,248
I don‘t think you want to hear
these things.
353
00:59:13,950 --> 00:59:15,286
I'll deal with it.
354
00:59:21,596 --> 00:59:23,258
Tell me about you.
355
00:59:26,050 --> 00:59:29,466
I'm a clean slate.
This must have something to do with you.
356
00:59:32,976 --> 00:59:34,742
How can you cheat on
your husband like that?
357
00:59:41,102 --> 00:59:42,647
Sex is exclusive.
358
00:59:44,592 --> 00:59:46,585
I get that in other ways.
Sex is just sex to me.
359
00:59:46,886 --> 00:59:48,621
What's more personal than sex?
360
00:59:48,746 --> 00:59:54,827
Your fears? Your inhibitions?
Your heartbreak.
361
00:59:56,154 --> 00:59:58,112
Your insecurities?
362
00:59:58,856 --> 01:00:00,801
Unconditional love.
363
01:00:02,189 --> 01:00:10,773
That's what me and my brother have.
We would do anything for each other.
364
01:00:12,175 --> 01:00:15,282
Ive missed that bond because
my parents got divorced.
365
01:00:16,622 --> 01:00:17,785
When I was five years old.
366
01:00:19,661 --> 01:00:20,929
I didn't see my father anymore.
367
01:00:22,792 --> 01:00:23,956
He left the country.
368
01:00:24,357 --> 01:00:25,456
Him and my brother.
369
01:00:26,157 --> 01:00:27,762
You never went to visit them?
370
01:00:27,813 --> 01:00:29,020
No I couldn‘t.
371
01:00:31,977 --> 01:00:33,666
It all comes back to childhood doesn't it?
372
01:00:35,937 --> 01:00:37,579
So it's all my father‘s fault as usual?
373
01:00:39,381 --> 01:00:43,363
Sweetie, my childhood was pretty easy.
374
01:00:48,246 --> 01:00:50,647
When a woman is sexually
aggressive they think
375
01:00:50,672 --> 01:00:53,174
she's traumatized or
something's wrong with her.
376
01:00:54,219 --> 01:00:56,520
Men are studs, women are sluts.
377
01:00:59,179 --> 01:01:02,293
Why can‘t they just accept that
this is something I want?
378
01:01:09,917 --> 01:01:17,018
It feels right. I feel more alive,
I respect people and l have more energy.
379
01:01:18,579 --> 01:01:22,059
Maybe it's that behavior that's
causing all your problems.
380
01:01:23,535 --> 01:01:26,198
You can't interpret your promise
to God at your whim.
381
01:01:27,194 --> 01:01:30,046
Where is it written in the wedding vows
that I can't fuck other people?
382
01:01:30,555 --> 01:01:31,622
I beg your pardon?
383
01:01:31,957 --> 01:01:35,557
Loyalty is something different than
agreeing not seeing other people.
384
01:01:35,721 --> 01:01:38,062
And please stop lecturing me.
385
01:01:39,930 --> 01:01:42,568
They say when you're a grown up...
386
01:01:42,586 --> 01:01:44,586
you can do anything you want.
387
01:01:45,911 --> 01:01:47,612
Well I sure haven't noticed it.
388
01:01:48,115 --> 01:01:52,334
First my father tells me
what I can and can't do.
389
01:01:52,674 --> 01:01:55,879
Then the school controls my life.
390
01:01:56,381 --> 01:01:59,607
My boss, my friends with
their expectations.
391
01:02:00,102 --> 01:02:04,325
The plant that needs watering.
The fridge that needs it's weekly filling...
392
01:02:04,637 --> 01:02:07,485
and finally Vincent who
gives me his biweekly.
393
01:02:12,152 --> 01:02:17,401
But there once was a time
where I considered quitting.
394
01:02:18,331 --> 01:02:20,258
I mean quitting everything.
395
01:02:24,463 --> 01:02:28,184
And then there was that night
were everything changed.
396
01:02:30,181 --> 01:02:31,799
I was at a friends' house.
397
01:02:34,809 --> 01:02:38,406
We're playing trivial pursuit.
I won.
398
01:02:40,437 --> 01:02:45,403
I enjoyed the red wine for the first time
in years. And it even made me joyful.
399
01:02:46,567 --> 01:02:48,214
And on my way home...
400
01:02:49,550 --> 01:02:51,612
suddenly a blizzard started.
401
01:02:52,660 --> 01:02:57,641
In the middle of the night on an
unlit highway, in the middle of nowhere.
402
01:02:59,753 --> 01:03:01,253
I made a game with myself.
403
01:03:04,427 --> 01:03:08,586
Drive unblinking into the snow
and hit something...
404
01:03:09,883 --> 01:03:12,486
or focus and get myself safely home.
405
01:03:14,581 --> 01:03:16,266
I chose the latter.
406
01:03:17,664 --> 01:03:19,751
I turned the radio on and just drove.
407
01:03:21,000 --> 01:03:23,658
0n the radio was a guest...
408
01:03:24,883 --> 01:03:26,839
and he was also depressed
and he had survived it.
409
01:03:27,328 --> 01:03:29,607
He described exactly how I felt.
410
01:03:30,518 --> 01:03:33,167
And then they played my
kind of music and...
411
01:03:34,315 --> 01:03:41,352
something peaceful setfled
into to me that never left.
412
01:03:46,098 --> 01:03:47,359
I could do it.
I could choose.
413
01:03:48,361 --> 01:03:54,567
And after that night I didn‘t just
think about sex... I WAS sex.
414
01:03:55,271 --> 01:03:58,742
My body became a flower...
415
01:03:58,778 --> 01:04:00,532
and | bloomed wider
than ever before.
416
01:04:00,666 --> 01:04:02,419
The game was on.
417
01:04:03,352 --> 01:04:05,633
First with men. Secret and fast.
418
01:04:06,836 --> 01:04:08,339
After that with a woman.
419
01:04:10,177 --> 01:04:11,708
A horny friend.
420
01:04:13,217 --> 01:04:15,356
Kisses and dirty talk.
421
01:04:16,249 --> 01:04:21,149
And after we attacked her husband
together there was no stopping me.
422
01:04:25,605 --> 01:04:31,343
What I feel now is worlds apart
from the way I felt in my cage.
423
01:04:34,292 --> 01:04:35,995
| caress my arm.
424
01:04:37,230 --> 01:04:41,034
I curl my toes from happiness.
I paint my nails...
425
01:04:43,699 --> 01:04:47,306
| shave everything
that can be smooth.
426
01:04:48,958 --> 01:04:51,615
And not for anyone else.
I do it because my body wants me.
427
01:04:52,392 --> 01:04:56,518
If I ride my bike I feel the seat
on my pussy. If I flirt...
428
01:04:56,917 --> 01:04:58,487
the world winks at me back.
429
01:04:59,050 --> 01:05:08,575
My body is celebrating. 24 hours a day,
7 days per week, it just celebrates.
430
01:05:09,326 --> 01:05:12,678
I sent invitations for whoever wants to
join and I leave the door wide open.
431
01:05:12,703 --> 01:05:18,180
When I have sex there are no thoughts,
No father's voice telling me what to do...
432
01:05:18,214 --> 01:05:21,308
or a boyfriend asking me what I like.
433
01:05:22,081 --> 01:05:23,917
This is just for me.
434
01:05:29,277 --> 01:05:30,906
And sometimes I feel guilty.
435
01:05:32,956 --> 01:05:34,488
Terribly guilty.
436
01:05:36,465 --> 01:05:40,379
In life you can run away from
everything exept yourself.
437
01:05:40,450 --> 01:05:42,573
Things can get back at you...
438
01:05:43,604 --> 01:05:46,488
but in the end you're the one who
has to pay the price.
439
01:05:48,791 --> 01:05:52,382
So now I've become that
mythical creature...
440
01:05:53,551 --> 01:05:57,448
A woman that all men
fantasize about...
441
01:05:57,875 --> 01:06:00,019
but think she doesn't exist.
442
01:06:02,289 --> 01:06:03,883
A unicorn.
443
01:06:27,939 --> 01:06:29,837
How can I explain this to people?
444
01:06:31,965 --> 01:06:33,217
What words can I use?
445
01:06:33,811 --> 01:06:40,641
It's just like going to a movie but I step
into the film and become part of it.
446
01:09:37,146 --> 01:09:38,164
Tell me...
447
01:09:38,802 --> 01:09:39,985
Did you enjoy the view?
448
01:09:41,279 --> 01:09:43,280
I still am.
449
01:09:45,850 --> 01:09:47,275
Can I have a Bitter Lemon?
450
01:09:54,676 --> 01:09:57,065
Where's your wife?
451
01:09:59,464 --> 01:10:01,498
| tied her up at home.
452
01:10:04,053 --> 01:10:05,607
Have you ever been tied up?
453
01:10:14,783 --> 01:10:17,290
You like to be in control don‘t you?
454
01:10:24,282 --> 01:10:26,955
Raymond. We need you.
455
01:10:27,780 --> 01:10:29,108
I'll be there.
456
01:10:35,591 --> 01:10:36,596
I'll be back.
457
01:11:50,810 --> 01:11:52,724
Exciting paintings.
458
01:12:07,025 --> 01:12:08,298
Two and a half.
459
01:12:10,017 --> 01:12:11,080
Cheers.
460
01:16:05,273 --> 01:16:09,206
We are not going to play with ourselves.
461
01:17:31,093 --> 01:17:32,152
Hey.
462
01:17:33,449 --> 01:17:34,890
What the hell are you doing?
463
01:17:35,765 --> 01:17:36,962
Hey!
464
01:17:37,169 --> 01:17:38,988
Asshole!
465
01:17:51,054 --> 01:17:53,206
Much better.
466
01:17:54,570 --> 01:17:59,130
Now I can feel you.
Like this...
467
01:18:00,893 --> 01:18:01,951
Yeah.
468
01:18:10,468 --> 01:18:11,827
Come on!
469
01:18:49,540 --> 01:18:53,376
I belong to the one in four women
who fantasizes about that.
470
01:18:54,368 --> 01:19:00,250
Thousands of women finger themselves
each night to their fantasy of forced sex.
471
01:19:00,857 --> 01:19:04,314
One attacker.
Two.
472
01:19:05,924 --> 01:19:07,002
0r five.
473
01:19:09,000 --> 01:19:11,018
Two between my legs...
474
01:19:11,030 --> 01:19:13,030
two in the hand...
475
01:19:13,431 --> 01:19:14,930
and one in the mouth.
476
01:19:17,698 --> 01:19:20,713
Isn't it great? Fantasizing is fine...
477
01:19:21,591 --> 01:19:24,697
but when push comes to shove
the reality is different.
478
01:19:24,967 --> 01:19:27,305
That's logical isn't it?
479
01:19:27,306 --> 01:19:28,232
Well...
480
01:19:29,157 --> 01:19:30,821
Then why do we have these fantasies?
481
01:19:31,556 --> 01:19:34,981
Why do we scream our heads off
if one is a bit rough with us...
482
01:19:35,616 --> 01:19:38,239
but in our mind we can take on five.
483
01:19:40,799 --> 01:19:43,604
These are the things I wonder about.
484
01:19:47,127 --> 01:19:52,043
I decided right there I wouldn't let
one bad apple spoil my pleasures.
485
01:19:52,476 --> 01:19:56,060
I could've easily decide to
throw in the towel...
486
01:19:56,812 --> 01:19:59,263
but instead I became
more self-confident.
487
01:20:00,799 --> 01:20:02,800
Do you think he's behind this?
488
01:20:04,502 --> 01:20:05,803
You know...
489
01:20:06,901 --> 01:20:10,875
everyone that I know is busy fighting
to get back what they once had...
490
01:20:12,274 --> 01:20:16,246
I'm fighting for what I want to become.
491
01:20:27,642 --> 01:20:30,938
Whatever it is, I'm sorry.
I'm truly sorry.OK
492
01:20:32,092 --> 01:20:34,600
I didn't do anything wrong!
493
01:20:35,479 --> 01:20:38,955
Nothing.
Nothing.
Sorry.
494
01:21:12,868 --> 01:21:14,477
Hello!
495
01:21:26,517 --> 01:21:28,228
He cut me.
496
01:21:36,250 --> 01:21:37,792
There were two of them.
497
01:21:39,698 --> 01:21:41,893
There was another guy.
498
01:21:57,103 --> 01:21:58,516
Are you in pain?
499
01:22:01,091 --> 01:22:02,165
Hey.
500
01:22:03,099 --> 01:22:04,128
Does it hurt?
501
01:22:04,159 --> 01:22:07,152
I think it's anesthetized.
I'm not sure.
502
01:22:11,358 --> 01:22:12,463
No anesthesia then.
503
01:22:43,683 --> 01:22:47,744
Goddammit!
504
01:22:49,770 --> 01:22:52,828
I'm starting to see what they are up to.
505
01:22:53,576 --> 01:22:55,974
DO YOU know "A clockwork orange"?
506
01:22:59,463 --> 01:23:02,662
A violent person is
bombarded with violent images...
507
01:23:03,007 --> 01:23:05,804
so that even He can't
take it anymore.
508
01:23:07,177 --> 01:23:09,044
They are trying to destroy me.
509
01:23:11,629 --> 01:23:13,645
To destroy what I have.
510
01:23:14,723 --> 01:23:16,114
My freedom.
511
01:23:19,731 --> 01:23:22,153
I won't let all this take it
away from me.
512
01:23:22,505 --> 01:23:24,412
Suppose we get out of here tomorrow.
513
01:23:25,298 --> 01:23:27,449
Would you just pick up where you left off?
514
01:23:29,327 --> 01:23:31,996
Could you go off to a sex party again?
515
01:23:33,982 --> 01:23:36,149
I think I'd have some trouble with that.
516
01:23:40,236 --> 01:23:45,088
Just like I do you disconnect sex from the
feelings you have on that table.
517
01:23:47,136 --> 01:23:50,699
And the lust and the pleasure of sex...
518
01:23:50,902 --> 01:23:53,746
get replaced by fear.
519
01:24:00,365 --> 01:24:03,237
So we need to replace all this
with something else...
520
01:24:04,362 --> 01:24:05,710
To get rid of the fear...
521
01:24:23,701 --> 01:24:25,544
What turns you on?
522
01:24:26,861 --> 01:24:28,465
Sorry?
523
01:24:28,658 --> 01:24:30,354
No don't apologize.
524
01:24:31,491 --> 01:24:33,330
Visualize it.
525
01:24:35,743 --> 01:24:37,373
I can't.
526
01:24:39,603 --> 01:24:43,007
Usually I can talk about
this stuff so easily...
527
01:24:44,641 --> 01:24:47,024
but with you it's different.
528
01:24:47,283 --> 01:24:52,619
Oh... because I‘m monogamous
you think I don't fantasize?
529
01:24:56,802 --> 01:24:58,713
I love control.
530
01:25:01,528 --> 01:25:06,420
I like to be on top
So that I can control the rhythm.
531
01:25:10,327 --> 01:25:11,974
I love giving head.
532
01:25:13,163 --> 01:25:15,728
Because it gives me so much power.
533
01:25:17,953 --> 01:25:20,709
His whole manhood in my mouth.
534
01:25:23,728 --> 01:25:27,274
I love looking at myself.
Really?
535
01:25:29,260 --> 01:25:34,963
Mirrors.
Pictures? Video?
536
01:25:36,849 --> 01:25:38,845
That's hot.
537
01:25:46,319 --> 01:25:50,453
I had an exhibitionist streak..
538
01:25:52,793 --> 01:25:55,755
I'd go out in public without my panties on.
539
01:25:56,677 --> 01:25:58,641
Really? You'd do that?
Yes.
540
01:26:01,539 --> 01:26:04,093
One time I was shopping with my friends...
541
01:26:04,538 --> 01:26:08,139
and we went for a drink in a cafe.
542
01:26:08,679 --> 01:26:12,265
A guy at the bar and I found
ourselves staring at each other.
543
01:26:13,731 --> 01:26:16,848
His eye contact was so strong...
544
01:26:17,096 --> 01:26:19,871
so horny and full of lust...
545
01:26:21,145 --> 01:26:23,593
I had to go to the ladies room...
546
01:26:24,087 --> 01:26:25,993
too make myself come.
547
01:26:26,179 --> 01:26:31,083
He came into the ladies room,
closed the door behind him...
548
01:26:32,039 --> 01:26:34,499
and fucked me against the wall...
549
01:26:34,749 --> 01:26:38,094
and without saying a
single word he left.
550
01:26:41,466 --> 01:26:44,646
What do you think is the most
beautiful thing about yourself?
551
01:26:47,051 --> 01:26:48,383
My ass.
552
01:26:49,180 --> 01:26:50,910
I think your breasts are.
553
01:26:53,567 --> 01:26:55,594
The way you carry yourself.
554
01:26:56,356 --> 01:26:57,580
Your scent.
555
01:27:08,320 --> 01:27:10,495
What are you doing?
556
01:27:11,621 --> 01:27:13,004
Visualizing.
557
01:27:36,445 --> 01:27:38,054
Sorry.
558
01:27:40,400 --> 01:27:41,445
Sorry.
559
01:27:48,986 --> 01:27:51,444
My husband left me.
560
01:27:53,366 --> 01:27:54,404
What?
561
01:27:56,274 --> 01:27:57,507
Damian.
562
01:28:00,451 --> 01:28:04,045
He cheated on me last month.
563
01:28:06,869 --> 01:28:09,319
And you're only telling me now.
564
01:28:09,385 --> 01:28:10,464
Why?
565
01:28:11,766 --> 01:28:15,197
He met someone else.
566
01:28:31,790 --> 01:28:33,790
Damian?
567
01:28:34,104 --> 01:28:35,614
Where are you?
568
01:28:35,690 --> 01:28:37,741
Call me back as soon as soon you get to location.
569
01:28:40,804 --> 01:28:41,859
First they betray you.
570
01:28:41,884 --> 01:28:47,401
Then they do what they please and
leave you behind as if it's all your fault.
571
01:28:48,013 --> 01:28:49,451
I hate that.
572
01:28:51,821 --> 01:28:53,345
That's not right.
573
01:28:58,053 --> 01:29:00,823
We're going to get out of here.
I won't last much longer.
574
01:29:03,984 --> 01:29:05,937
That betrayal.
575
01:29:08,372 --> 01:29:14,851
It has such a grip on all other emotions
that it chokes everything...
576
01:29:17,105 --> 01:29:19,623
until everything is dead.
577
01:29:23,266 --> 01:29:24,352
Except the rage.
578
01:29:30,995 --> 01:29:34,714
I saw it when my parents got divorced.
579
01:29:48,132 --> 01:29:50,939
You're a unique woman.
580
01:33:05,822 --> 01:33:07,772
What did you do?
581
01:33:10,240 --> 01:33:12,813
What have you gotten me in to?
582
01:33:14,308 --> 01:33:16,660
I don't understand you.
You were supposed to break her.
583
01:33:17,667 --> 01:33:18,815
To teach Damian a lesson.
584
01:33:18,840 --> 01:33:19,975
Do you think l was joking?
585
01:33:20,665 --> 01:33:23,070
What the fuck!
586
01:33:34,268 --> 01:33:36,096
My God Christina what have you done?
587
01:33:37,382 --> 01:33:39,249
I can‘t do this.
Shutup!
588
01:35:19,244 --> 01:35:21,954
Okay.
We've got to leave her behind.
589
01:35:23,310 --> 01:35:25,957
She still doesn't know anything.
Not who we are, not where we live.
590
01:35:36,469 --> 01:35:38,587
I‘m going back tomorrow and
you're coming with me.
591
01:35:46,384 --> 01:35:50,120
Do you realize what you've destroyed?
592
01:35:57,035 --> 01:35:59,270
There's really something wrong with you.
593
01:36:14,272 --> 01:36:15,243
Good.
594
01:36:18,260 --> 01:36:20,798
We'll finish up and leave her behind.
595
01:36:26,289 --> 01:36:29,525
No one will come by and
It's up to her to get out.
596
01:36:30,437 --> 01:36:31,590
Meanwhile...
597
01:38:14,844 --> 01:38:22,200
And if you, the Stella from now,
look at the Stella from a year ago...
598
01:38:22,546 --> 01:38:24,013
what do you see?
599
01:38:25,978 --> 01:38:28,997
That now, like then...
600
01:38:29,067 --> 01:38:33,321
she's alone and
probably always will be.
601
01:38:35,185 --> 01:38:40,095
That I had secrets then from myself,
but now only from other people.
602
01:38:41,823 --> 01:38:44,099
And I'd tell her that
symbioses doesn't exist.
603
01:38:46,008 --> 01:38:47,241
That...
604
01:38:48,583 --> 01:38:51,091
she wants a connection
but she'll never get it.
605
01:38:51,794 --> 01:38:54,646
However painful this discovery is
and how liberating...
606
01:38:54,782 --> 01:39:00,472
but sacrifices have to be made
if you don't want to be alone.
607
01:39:08,160 --> 01:39:09,661
Thank you.
608
01:40:55,288 --> 01:41:00,558
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