All language subtitles for The.Flintstones.S03E08.WEBRip.x264-ION10

[theme song]

[squawking]

Yabba-dabba-doo!

♪ Flintstones meet the Flintstones ♪

♪ They're the modern Stone Age family ♪

♪ From the town of Bedrock ♪

♪ They're a page right out of history ♪

♪ Let's ride with the family down the street ♪

♪ Through the courtesy of Fred's two feet ♪

♪ When you're with the Flintstones ♪

♪ Have a yabba-dabba-doo time ♪

♪ A dabba-doo time ♪

♪ We'll have a gay ol' time ♪♪

And last night, I made Fred

a delicious souffle.

And still he complained.

It seems nothing suits him anymore.

Look, Wilma, don't tell me your troubles.

I'm married, too, you know.

'So what are you going to'

'let Fred turn up his nose at tonight?'

Tonight, I thought I'd serve pterodactyl eggs mornay.

And, uh, maybe a nice crisp seaweed salad.

(Betty) 'Well, there's something wrong with Fred'

'if he doesn't like that.'

Awk! Phoo!

I don't like soapy water.

Wilma!

Hey, Wilma, where are my golf clubs?

(Wilma) 'Where they always are, Fred. In the closet.'

No, they're not. I looked.

Well, look again. I'm sure they're there.

(Fred) 'She's sure they're there.'

She's always so sure of everything.

Well, I'm sure they're not in the closet.

Hmph!

Watch. "I can't find them, Wilma."

(Fred) 'I can't find them, Wilma.'

[giggles]

What did I tell you?

They're there, Fred. Just look.

I'm lookin'! I'm lookin'!

I tell you, my golf clubs aren't in here.

'I can find my bowlin' ball, my fishin' pole'

'my tennis racket, baseball glove, golf clubs'

'tuxedo, hatbox..'

Golf clubs?

That's right, Fred. Golf clubs.

And whose bright idea was it

to hide my clubs in the closet?

(Wilma) 'Yours, dear.'

Huh? Oh, yeah.

Fred, what's wrong with you?

You've been acting so grumpy lately.

(Fred) 'Ahh.'

All you do is yell, complain, criticize.

Why, it's been weeks since you had

'a good word for anybody or anything.'

Oh, yeah? How about last night?

I had somethin' good to say about your mother.

- 'My mother?' - 'Yeah.'

(Fred) 'I said it's a good thing she lives 50 miles away.'

[snickering]

(Wilma) 'Fred Flintstone, I resent that.'

(Fred) 'Ahh.'

There's something wrong with you, Fred.

I want you to see the doctor

this morning and get a checkup.

I can't see the doctor this mornin'.

I'm playin' golf with Barney in ten minutes.

(Wilma) 'Oh, no, you're not.'

'You're going to the doctor.'

Maybe he'll give you a nerve tonic or something.

And when you start acting like a human being again

then you can get back to your golf.

(Fred) 'Ahh.'

Come on, Dino, before he bites you.

Heya, how come we're goin' to the doctor

instead of the golf course, Fred?

- Are you sick? - Of course I'm not sick.

I'm fit as a fiddle.

But Wilma says I can't play golf

till I start actin' like a human being.

[laughs]

Oh, some wives really set impossible tasks

for their husbands, don't they?

Very funny.

Ooh, you're a regular comedian.

Oh, sorry, Fred.

Uh-oh!

- Look who's there. - Who, Fred?

(Fred) 'That smart-alecky kid, Arnold'

who delivers our newspapers.

So what?

So every time I see him

we have a battle of wits.

Oh, I get it. You're out of ammunition. Ha ha.

Hiya, Mr. Flintstone.

I was just on my way to your house.

'You owe me for last week's newspaper delivery.'

Alright, alright.

You don't have to bug me, Arnold.

- 'Here's your money.' - Thanks, Mr. Flintstone.

As of now, I am canceling my subscription.

- Why? - Why?

Because more and more that paper of yours

is failing to fulfill its obligation

to the public, that's why.

Oh, I don't understand what you mean.

I mean, your comics section

has shrunk to almost nothin'.

Only 15 measly comic strips

in the whole thing.

You call that a newspaper? Ha!

Oh, gee, Mr. Flintstone

I'd sure hate to lose you as a customer.

I'll tell you what.

I'll give you a special rate.

"A special rate?"

Uh-huh. Now, let's see now.

You're paying five cents a copy on weekdays

and 15 cents on Sundays.

Five cents weekdays, 15 cents on Sundays, that's right.

Well, I tell you what I'm gonna do.

I'll charge you six cents for the daily paper

but only a dime on Sundays.

- What do you say? - Hmm.

That sounds like a fair enough deal.

Okay, Arnold, under those conditions

I'll stay your customer.

(Arnold) 'I thought you would, Mr. Flintstone.'

Goodbye, gentlemen!

So long, Arnold.

[laughs]

Yeah, I suppose you think

I took advantage of the kid, Barney.

But I just did that to teach him a lesson.

Oh, Fred, you're payin' 46 cents

a week now instead of 45 cents.

Huh?

Why, that little..

He took advantage of me!

Hey, Arnold, come back here!

It's too late, Fred. He's gone.

And besides, you got a doctor's appointment, remember?

Good afternoon, gentlemen.

Can I help you?

Uh, yeah, I got an appointment

to see the doctor.

I'm Fred Flintstone.

Please be seated.

The doctor will see you in a moment.

(Fred) 'Okay.'

(doctor) 'Nurse, can you come in here for a minute?'

Certainly, doctor.

Don't look so worried, Fred.

You're only having an examination.

Who-who-who's worried? I'm-I'm not worried.

I-I just don't like waitin'.

(doctor) 'What do you think, nurse?'

It's got to come out. What's the trouble?

Well, it seems to be caught on something.

I just can't budge it.

(nurse) 'Did you try a crowbar?'

(doctor) 'Hmm. That might work. Only I-I haven't got one.'

(nurse) 'Well, hit it a couple of times with this hammer.'

A hammer?

[banging]

There. Mm-hmm.

That seems to have loosened it a bit.

Maybe if we both pulled on it together, it'll come out.

Good idea.

'Ready? Pull!'

'Here it comes!'

Come on, Barney, let's come back sometime

when the doctor ain't so busy.

Hey, Fred, wait! You can't leave now.

You got an appointment.

Honest, Barney, there ain't nothin' wrong with me.

But it ain't official until a doctor tells you, Fred.

Oh, there you are, Mr. Flintstone.

The doctor is waiting for you now.

D-d-don't leave me, Barney.

I-I may need you as a witness.

Okay, Mr. Flintstone

say "ahh," please.

Ahh, please.

Say "ahh" again, please.

Ahh again, please.

Hmm, my, my, you may not be the healthiest patient

I've ever had..

[chuckles] ...but you are certainly the politest.

Oh, come on, doc. Will you hurry it up?

Ah-ah. Patients should have patience.

I lose my patience

with patients without patience.

Hmm. That's not bad.

Yes, now, let's take a look inside of you

and see what makes you tick.

What kind of contraption is this, doc?

This? Oh, it's a new invention.

They call it an X-ray machine.

'Oh, my!'

'No wonder you've been feeling so grouchy.'

'You've got butterflies in your stomach.'

Oops! Oh, sorry.

[chuckles] Just a couple of moths on the machine.

You know something?

You're the first patient I ever had

who looks better in an X-ray.

Very funny. Very funny.

Can I get out of here now?

Oh, not so fast, Mr. Flintstone.

We've just started.

Alright. Take a deep breath.

[inhales deeply]

Now exhale.

[exhales deeply]

'Inhale.'

'Exhale.'

'Inhale.'

'Exhale.'

How am I doin', doc?

Fine. You'll have this place aired out in no time.

'Now once more, big inhale.'

clang

That does it!

Let's get out of here before this doctor

really needs a doctor.

How about that?

Wasted a whole mornin'

with that nutty doctor

when I could have been playin' golf.

Boy, am I gonna tell Wilma off.

(Barney) 'Well, uh, don't tell her too much'

'or she might never let you play golf again.'

Hey! There's Arnold.

I got a score to settle with him.

'Hold it, you little pirate!'

'Thought you could fool me, eh?'

I beg your pardon.

You and your special rates!

I'm paying 46 cents a week now

instead of 45 cents!

screech

You are? Oh, Mr. Flintstone, I apologize.

You have a legitimate complaint.

Thought you could pull a fast one on me, eh?

Well, let's see now, six times six

for the daily paper is 36, right?

Yeah, and ten cents for the Sunday paper

makes it a total of 46 cents.

When you were paying 15 cents

for the Sunday paper

your bill was only 45 cents, right?

Right.

(Arnold) I'll tell you what I'll do, Mr. Flintstone.

I'll let you go back

to paying me 15 cents for the Sunday paper.

- How about it? - Okay, it's a deal.

I'm only bein' tough for your own good, Arnold.

I hope you'll profit from it.

I certainly hope to, Mr. Flintstone.

Good day, and thank you.

- Um, Fred? - Yeah?

I hate to say this

but Arnold did it again.

(Fred) 'Come back here, you baby bandit!'

Come back here!

Ooh, if I ever get my hands on you

I'll pulverize you!

Let me at him, Barney, let me at him!

[laughs]

Yoo-hoo, Wilma!

(Wilma) 'Hi, Betty. Come on in.'

Did Arnold's mother call you yet?

Arnold's mother? Why, no.

Well, she will.

She and her husband will be out of town

for a few days, and she's looking

for someone to take care of Arnold.

Oh? When will they leave?

In about a week.

She asked me, but I haven't got a spare room.

tring tring

(Betty) 'Oh, that's probably her now.'

(Wilma) Hello?

Oh, hi, Doris.

Yes, Betty just told me.

And I'd be happy to have Arnold stay with us.

We have plenty of room.

(Fred) 'Oh, boy, what a mornin'.'

First that kooky doctor

then that junior con man Arnold.

'It's all Wilma's fault.'

Of course. I love children.

But I'm not sure how Fred will feel about it.

He might not like the patter

of little feet around the house.

It's been just us two for so long.

Uh, Fred might not welcome a little stranger.

Hey, uh, what little stranger, Fred?

Don't you get it, Barney?

My Wilma's gonna have a baby!

Oh, boy, Fred.

I couldn't be happier

if it was happening to me.

Congratulations.

Thanks, Barney, old friend.

Well, he can't arrive too soon for me.

But knowing Fred..

...I think I'll keep it a secret from him

until the very last minute.

Isn't that sweet?

She wants to keep it a secret from me.

Listen, Barney, let's not even let on that we know.

Don't tell Betty! Nobody!

Let Wilma enjoy her little secret.

Okay, daddy.

Daddy.

Yabba-dabba..

(Barney) 'Quiet, Fred. Wilma will hear you.'

Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's right.

I don't want to spoil her little surprise.

Well, it's all settled.

Arnold will stay with us while his parents are gone.

Oh, good. You'll enjoy Arnold.

He's such a bright little boy.

Now, remember, Barney, act like you don't know nothin'.

You can trust me, Fred.

- Be real casual. - Right.

Okay, let's go in.

Wilma, sweetheart!

How do you feel, baby?

'What are you doin' on your feet?'

Standing. What else?

Standing? Do-do you suppose that's wise?

S-suppose you fall or trip

or-or get a charley horse.

Oh, come on, honey. You-you better sit down.

Let's not take any chances.

Fred, what is this, a gag?

A gag? Of course not.

Can't a man show his wife a little appreciation

for all she's done for him?

And, uh, what she's gonna do for him?

Heh heh heh!

Ixnay, Barney, ixnay.

Well, all this attention is very nice

but I've got to fix lunch.

Tut tut! You've done enough work today, wifey dear.

I will get the lunch.

- But-but-but-- - No buts, honey.

Barney, wanna give me a hand in the kitchen?

Oh, sure, Fred.

Relax, Wilma, I will take care

of everything from now on.

I don't get it.

Do you suppose he's sick?

I don't know.

But whatever he's got

I just wish Barney'd catch it.

[instrumental music]

(Fred) 'Good morning, dear.'

One breakfast coming up!

Dodo egg benedict, cactus toast jelly

and hot chocolate.

'All prepared with loving hands.'

Oh, Fred, you're spoiling me.

This is the fourth day I've had breakfast in bed.

Well, hubby is just tryin'

to make life a little easier

for his buttercup.

'If you want anything'

I'll be in the kitchen, baby.

I've just time to scrub the floor

before I go to work.

Oh, he's such a dear.

Ugh!

If he could only cook.

I hope you don't mind

walkin' to work these mornings, Barney.

I'm leaving the car home

in case Wilma needs it.

Fred, I-I can't get over

the way you've changed, Fred.

It's like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

Only you're all Jekyll and Jekyll.

[chuckles]

Well, I guess all papas-to-be are this way.

You-you get a feelin' of contentment, you know?

You know, you-you get to love everybody.

- Come on, Hector. - 'Yes, dear.'

Keep up with the rest of us.

Yes, dear.

Look, Barney, isn't this touchy?

You must be a very proud and happy man, sir.

Well, it's either this or the army.

(Fred) 'Hey, Arnold, wait a minute.'

- Uh-oh! - Don't worry, Arnold.

I'm not sore because you fast-talked me

into payin' more for my papers.

- You're not? - No.

You were just bein' a smart businessman.

I like that.

I always felt that success in business

means givin' the customer what he deserves.

Yeah. Ha ha ha!

You gonna play a little baseball after school?

(Arnold) 'Yes, sir.'

Hey, how about lettin' me give you a few pointers, Arnold?

Um, I was known as "Dizzy Flintstone"

when I used to pitch for the high-school team.

Gosh, Mr. Flintstone, would you?

(Fred) 'Sure. Give me the ball and glove.'

Here you are, sir.

I'll go across the street and try to hit a few.

Hey, what's the idea, Fred? We gotta get to work.

Ah, this'll only take a minute, Barney.

After all, I'll soon be playin' ball with my son.

I wanna get in practice. Ready, Arnold?

- Ready! - Okay.

I'll pitch a few easy ones at first.

Now, try to hit the ball.

Nice one, Arnold!

Ohh!

Oh, excuse me, Mr. Flintstone.

I didn't mean to hit it so hard.

Think nothin' of it, Arnold.

I, uh, just wasn't ready.

'Now, watch out for this next one.'

'I'm gonna put a little curve on it.'

I'm ready, Mr. Flintstone.

I got it! I got it!

clang thud

[laughs]

I think we better change pitchers, Fred.

We're losin' the old ball game.

Oh, yeah? Well, I'm just warmin' up.

Watch this.

clang

[glass shatters]

I gotta go now, Mr. Flintstone.

I'll be late for school. Bye!

Hey, fatso. You with the baseball glove.

'That'll cost you five bucks.'

Ooh, that Arnold.

I tried to like him, I tried be nice to him.

But I can't stand him!

Ooh, my head!

[instrumental music]

(Betty) 'And Fred is still cooking dinner every night?'

Mm-hmm. He won't let me lift a finger around the house.

Last night, I tried to wash the dishes

and he actually got mad.

So what?

Which would you rather have?

A guilty conscience or dishpan hands?

[giggling]

Uh, does Fred know about Arnold coming to stay with you?

No. But I'll have to tell him soon.

Arnold's coming over Saturday.

Hmm.

(Wilma) 'Now, where did we leave the car?'

We parked on the corner.

What's the matter with him?

Giddy-up, you!

Read the sign, lady.

"Don't take carts from parking area."

Oh, I'm sorry.

It's alright.

[buzzing]

Hey, Fred! Fred!

Oh! Oh, hi, Barney.

Hold it a minute, Becky.

How's big daddy today?

Oh, alright, I guess.

Oh, what's the matter, pal? Somethin' wrong?

Yeah. I-I was talkin' to my boss this mornin'.

His wife's had four kids, you know.

He told me that every time she has a baby

he has to get a nurse for her.

Oh, and they're expensive.

Those nurses get eight bucks a day.

Eight bucks a day?

I ain't got that kinda money. What am I gonna do?

Oh, well, take it easy, Fred.

After all, for every solution, there's a problem.

You mean, for every problem, there's a solution.

Is that so?

Oh, then I hope you find a solution to this one.

[laughs]

(Fred) Oh, for the love of..

Say, when Betty's sister had her baby

where did she get a nurse?

Uh, buh, come to think of it, uh..

...she didn't have a nurse.

Her mother took care of her.

Huh?

Yeah! That's it.

I'll get Wilma's mother to look after her.

It won't cost a cent. I'll call her right away.

Oh, but, Fred, uh..

...you don't get along with your mother-in-law.

Barney, right now

my personal feelings don't count.

I am doing this for Wilma and our son.

And to save money.

[laughs]

tring tring

'Coming! Coming!'

- Hello? - 'Hi, mom.'

'This is son-in-law Fred.'

Fred?

Don't tell me Wilma has finally

come to her senses and is leaving you?

Oh, boy.

Uh, say, mom, we haven't

seen you for a long time.

Why don't you come visit us?

Stay as long as you like.

About two or three months maybe.

Alright, Fred. Who was it?

Some long-lost uncle?

(Fred over phone) 'What are you talking about?'

You can't fool me, Fred Flintstone.

Somebody left me some money.

Oh, mother, is that nice?

Can't I invite you to spend a little time with us

without you suspectin' somethin'?

You'll come over?

Swell. Bye, mom.

Hey, uh, she's coming, huh?

Yep, she'll be here Friday.

On the 5:15 broom.

Honestly, mother, he's been an angel all week.

Asking you to stay with us was his idea.

Don't you think that was sweet?

Hah!

Sometimes I look at him and feel like saying

"And now will the real Fred Flintstone

please stand up?"

I still think that husband of yours is up to something.

(Wilma) 'Oh, mother, you're so suspicious.'

Maybe, but don't forget

a leopard can't change his spots.

Mother, Fred is not a leopard.

Well...a baboon can't, either.

Here you are, girls.

A nice refreshing glass of seaweed juice.

Hmm.

We oughta make him taste it first.

Oh, mother!

Thank you, Fred.

That's awfully considerate of you.

Think nothing of it, my dear.

And now, if you'll excuse me

I'll take mother's bag up to her room.

Thanks, dear.

Come on, Hugo.

[humming]

See what I mean, mother? I can't believe it.

I don't believe it.

(Wilma) 'Mother, will you please stop?'

Alright, alright.

I think I'll go to my room now and rest.

[humming]

Who you lookin' for, Wilma?

You expectin' somebody?

Uh, yes, I am.

Uh, Fred, dear

I've been keeping a secret from you.

- Really? - Mm-hmm.

I should have told you sooner, but..

[chuckling]

But you didn't know how I'd take it, right?

Right.

You see, we are going

to have a little visitor.

[laughs]

Wilma, honey

I gotta confess, I knew it all along.

- 'You did?' - Uh-huh.

I was outside the window

when you were on the phone talkin' about it.

Oh, Fred!

You knew all this time and you're not mad?

Mad? I'm tickled pink!

Yabba-dabba-doo!

O-ho! I feel so relieved, Fred.

Of course, if you don't want him

I'll send him back.

Well, of course I want..

Wha-what?

S-send him back?

[laughs]

Oh, that's a good one, Wilma.

[laughing]

When do you expect this little stranger, dear?

(Wilma) 'Any minute now.'

boing

Any minute?

Well, quick! Do-do something!

I know! I-I'll boil some water.

I-I'll get your slippers. No, I'll get Barney.

No, no, the doctor. I'll call the doctor.

Fred! For heaven's sakes. Have you gone crazy?

Ju-just keep calm, honey. I'll take care of everything.

I've been rehearsing for this minute.

[stammering] Doctor? Fred Flintstone.

G-g-get over here quick!

Now, keep-keep cool, honey. Be brave like me.

Oh, what's taking that doc so long?

I-I better call again.

For goodness sakes, what's going on in here?

I'm trying to get some rest.

knock knock knock

Who's that?

That must be the little visitor

we're expecting.

Let him in, Fred.

What?

I said our little visitor has arrived.

Let him in.

Boy, I know medical science is doing wonders

but this is ridiculous.

[door opens]

(Arnold) Hello, Mr. Flintstone.

Arnold! Go on home!

This is no place for children

at a time like this!

Fred, what are you saying?

Arnold is our little visitor.

Arnold?

Ar-Ar-Ar-Ar-Arnold

is our-our little v-v-visitor?

Yes, siree. And I'm stayin' two weeks.

And I'm staying for six months.

[babbling]

thud

[knock on door]

Pardon me. Does somebody need a doctor here?

Yeah. That 200 pounds of blubber on the floor.

Ha ha ha!

[blowing raspberry]

[laughing]

[blowing raspberry]

[laughing]

[theme song]

♪ Flintstones meet the Flintstones ♪

♪ They're the modern Stone Age family ♪

♪ From the town of Bedrock ♪

♪ They're a page right out of history ♪

♪ Someday maybe Fred will win the fight ♪

♪ Then that cat will stay out for the night ♪

♪ When you're with the Flintstones ♪

♪ Have a yabba-dabba-doo time ♪

♪ A dabba-doo time ♪

♪ We'll have a gay ol' time ♪

♪ We'll have a gay ol' time ♪♪

Wilma!