All language subtitles for The Flintstones s03e14 Dial S for Suspicion.eng

[theme song]

[squawking]

Yabba dabba doo!

? Flintstones meet the Flintstones ?

? They're the modern Stone Age family ?

? From the town of Bedrock ?

? They're a page right out of history ?

? Let's ride with the family down the street ?

? Through the courtesy of Fred's two feet ?

? When you're with the Flintstones ?

? Have a yabba dabba doo time ?

? A dabba doo time ?

? We'll have a gay old time ??

Hello, Flintstones!

Hello, there!

Come in, Barney.

Fred's in the shower.

I'll tell him you're here.

Fred, Barney's here!

? La lala lala lala ?

(Wilma) 'Fred?'

'Did you hear me, Fred?'

'Hurry or you'll be late for work.'

Okay, okay, honey, just gotta rinse off.

How about a little hot water, please?

'I said more hot water!'

Let's, heat it up, Mat.

Okay, now little cold water to finish up with.

Oh, for Pete's sake!

Brr-rr!

What's with that guy?

Yeah, I know it's tough, pal.

But when you advertise hot and cold running water

that's what you gotta give 'em.

Okay, Barney, let's go.

Bye-bye, Wilma honey. Mwah!

Come on, Barney.

Oh! Ooh..

The-the door's stuck, Fred.

- Gimme a hand. - Okay, Barn.

When I count three heaves.

One, two, three, heave.

That did it, Barney.

'I'll back the car out, and you can get in.'

Hop in, pal.'

crash

Hey, w-w-what happened, Fred?

Ah, quit the clownin', Barney!

Can't you get into the car like anybody else?

I, um, got some news for you, Barney.

I maybe gettin' another and better job.

Oh, no fooling? Where?

I answered this ad in the paper.

Let's see, uh..

'"Wanted man for high position'

'"at Stone Valley Inn.'

'"Must be executive type'

'"college graduate'

'"speaks Spanish.'

Salary 450 per month plus meals."

And-and you applied for this job, Fred?

Uh-huh, and I should be getting an answer any day now.

Sounds like some job, huh, Barns?

'It sure does, Fred.'

- 'But, uh..' - Uh, what?

'Uh, you ain't a college graduate.'

So who has to know?

If they wanna see my diploma

I'll tell 'em it was lost in a fire.

Oh, sure, and if they want to hear you speak Spanish

you'll tell 'em your accent was lost in a fire, too.

[laughing]

It so happens that I qualify perfectly

for the most important part of that ad.

Oh, you mean, uh, the meals.

Very funny.

I mean the executive type.

sniff sniff

Say, that smells might good, Wilma.

It's Fred's favorite, Betty.

Seaweed Fricassee.

I got the recipe from his mother.

Rr-rr-aw!

What's the matter with Dino?

(Wilma) 'He hears something.'

From the way he's acting, I'd say

it was his natural enemy, the mailman.

Rr-rr-aw!

bark bark

Dino, come back here, Dino.

Dino, stop that!

Really, Mrs. Flintstone.

I wish you'd do something about that animal.

I'm sorry, Mr. Featherspine.

I'll just have to keep him tied up.

- There's a letter for you. - Thank you.

It won't happen again, Mr. Featherspine.

I promise.

It won't happen again, it won't happen again.

Promises, promises, promises.

A letter for Fred.

I wonder what it is!

Looks like it might be important.

Yes.

Hmm..

Darn these thick envelopes.

Yeah, how do they expect people to read

other people's mail through them?

(Wilma) 'Now, Betty.'

'I'm not trying to read Fred's mail.'

- I'm just.. - Of course you are.

You could steam it open.

Oh, no, no, no, I wouldn't do that.

But if I would do it, how would I do it?

Why ask me? I've never done it.

But I do know you hold the envelope over steam.

Steam?

Like the steam from a pot of Seaweed Fricassee?

Exactly.

I think I can open it now.

Oh, Betty, there's a letter opener on that desk set.

'Would you hand it to me, please?'

(Betty) 'Here you are, Wilma.'

clip clip

There.

Somebody outta wise this dame up.

Tameprin' with the mails is a federal offense.

squawk

"Dear, Mr. Flintstone.

'"Your application for the position'

'"at Stone Valley Inn'

'"has been accepted.'

I am looking forward to.."

Betty, Fred's gotten himself a job at Stone Valley Inn!

Stone Valley.

Isn't that the ritzy resort in the mountains

where you can swim and ski in the same day?

(Wilma) 'That's the place.'

A girl I know who went there

got sunburned in the morning

frost at midnight

and ended up with third degree chilblains.

There, all sealed up.

Fred'll never know it's been opened.

The letter's signed by Conrad Hailstone

the owner of Stone Valley Inn.

And he wants to see me at my earliest convenience!

Go tomorrow, it's Saturday.

Yeah, yeah, I'll get Barney to drive up with me.

Oh, boy, oh, boy!

Wilma, this job's really gonna be something.

Four hundred and fifty bucks a month and meals!

Hey, what's this?

Seaweed?

Aha-ha! Ha-ha ha.

How do you suppose that got in there?

(Fred) 'I know how it got in there.'

- You do? - Sure!

As an added endorsement, Mr. Hailstone enclosed

a sample of the food I'll be getting.

Mm...Seaweed Fricassee

and just like my mother used to make.

I guess you're pretty excited

wondering what the new job'll be, huh, Fred?

Yeah, yeah, the ad said "High position,"

That could mean anything from manager up.

The ad also said they wanted

a college graduate who could speak Spanish.

Oh, stop worryin', I'll just say, uh

si, senorita and hasty banana.

That's Spanish?

(male 1) 'Well, Flintstone, I think you'll do.'

Of course, there's the matter of a physical examination.

- Physical examination? - Yes, yes.

We have a company doctor who takes care of it free of charge.

Uh, just a formality, really.

'Don't worry about it.'

[stammering]

I ain't worried.

Why, from my toes to my head

I'm solid as a rock.

Yes, yes, you will like it here at Stone Valley, Flintstone.

As all my employees say

"When you work for Conrad Hailstone

you work for the best."

Well, your employees say that, huh?

If they wanna get paid, they do.

Fred, uh, would you like to join me in a coconut?

Uh, if I can ever figure out how to open it.

Alright.

'Now, let's say I save'

'40 a month on meals, that's uh..'

'Oh, wait, that should be a four.'

rub rub

Ooh, ouch! Oh, darn it!

I don't see why I should have to suffer

for his mistakes.

(Wilma) 'Fred, honey.'

Now that you'll, uh..

...be making more money, there's something

I want to discuss with you.

What is it, my dear?

Mink, diamonds, anything at all?

Ha-ha ha-ha!

Life insurance.

Life insurance?

Why all of a sudden do you wanna be insured?

- Not me, you. - Me?

thud thud thud

Barney, will you cut that out?

Look what you're doing to the table.

Oh, uh, sorry, Fred.

I was, uh, just tryin' to open this here coconut.

Well, you don't have to ruin my table!

'Use your head, will you?'

Oh, a-alright.

thud

Hey, what do you know?

You was right, Fred.

Oh, boy.

Fred, never mind Barney.

We were talking about insurance.

I haven't mentioned it

because I felt we couldn't afford it.

But now things are gonna be different.

(Fred) 'Honey, money ain't gonna change me.'

'I'm going to be the same sweet--'

Fred.

Look, Fred, I know it's not a pleasant thing to talk about.

'But a wife should have protection'

'in case, well, in case something'

happens to her husband.

How about it, Fred?

Will you take out some insurance?

O-okay, honey, I'll do it.

- Maybe tomorrow. - Good, here's the policy.

Read it over, then sign it.

Say, Wilma's really sold on that insurance bit.

Yeah, but she's right, Barney.

She deserves protection.

Hey, this policy's for twenty thousand bucks.

Twenty thousand?

And there's a double indemnity clause.

If I go accidently, she gets 40,000.

Wowie!

Oh, I can see why you'll be worth

a lot more to Wilma dead than alive!

[both laughing]

Yeah.

All I have to do is kick off

and she's a rich woman. Ha-ha-ha!

Hey, what are we laughing at?

What? Uh, ooh, I don't know.

I guess we're happy at the thought of Wilma

finally getting all the things she's wanted out of life.

Oh, cut it out.

Come on, let's play some gin rummy.

Ah, good idea, Fred.

Ah, get our minds of these silly thoughts, huh?

(Fred) 'And where are the cards?'

Hm..

'"Dial S for suspicion."'

Yeah, that's Wilma's book, don't lose the place.

Ah, here are the cards. I'll deal, you keep score.

Oh, me.

Why can't he keep score in his head?

(Barney) 'Hey, uh, Fred, this is an exciting book.'

Listen.

"Don't worry about my husband

"Rodney Derris, said Felicia.

"Tomorrow he will have a fatal accident

"and I will collect the insurance.

"Goodie, said Rodney

"her handsome young lover.

And then we can be married."

Oh, boy, Fred.

That's real romantic stuff, huh?

Yeah.

Put the book down, Barney.

Let's..

Let me see that book.

Barney, this is all about a woman

who gets her husband insured and then bumps him off!

So?

Oh, I see what you're thinking.

Oh, for shame, Fred Flintstone.

'For shame.'

Yeah, yeah, you're right, Barney.

I'm ashamed of myself.

Wilma getting me to take out insurance

and reading this book..

...it's just a coincidence.

Oh, exactly.

Don't ever get any ideas about Wilma.

Oh, oh, oh, she's true blue.

You said it.

Did you sign the policy yet, Fred?

No, no, what's the rush?

No rush. Only there's no sense putting it off.

Yeah, yeah, I guess you're right.

Yeah, I'll sign it now.

You'll be sorry!

There you are, sweetheart.

Thanks, Fred.

I certainly hope I never need it.

But you never know.

Insurance can be a wife's best friend.

- Hm? - 'What's with the "Hm?"'

Oh, I was just thinking about what Wilma said.

"Insurance can be a wife's best friend."

(Fred) 'So?'

So 40,000 bucks could be

the start of a beautiful friendship.

Will you cut that out?

Hmm, I'll have to get Fred to fix this lose handle.

Oops!

- Feel better now, Fred? - 'Yeah, Barney.'

I'll never suspect Wilma again.

Duh..

(Wilma) 'Fred? Oh, my goodness, Fred!'

It's alright, Wilma. He just fainted.

Oh, oh, Fred, I'm so glad you weren't hurt.

Yeah, well, accidents will happen.

Eh, it was an accident

wasn't it, Wilma?

(Wilma) 'Now, that's a stupid question.'

I'm sorry, Wilma.

I lost my head.

Yeah, you almost did at that.

[laughing]

Well, as long as you're alright, Fred.

I'll finish getting dinner.

Barney, she did it on purpose.

Oh, come on now, Fred.

You know it was an accident.

Well, yeah, yeah, I-I guess so.

Sure, Wilma's no dope.

If she wanted to get rid of you

she wouldn't throw a cleaver at you.

She'd do something safe like, uh

puttin' bug spray in your soup.

(Wilma) 'Come on, Fred, you're soup's ready.'

You're really enjoyin' that book, huh, Wilma?

Oh, yes.

It's about a woman who tries to get rid

of her husband for his insurance.

Yeah, how does she go about it?

'Oh, a number of ways.'

'Right now, I'm up to the part where she puts'

'a pillow over his head.'

[stammering]

P-pillow ov-over his head?

Look, honey, that's not the kind of stuff

you should be reading.

Why don't you turn out the light and go to sleep?

No, I want to read a while. You go to sleep, Fred.

- I don't think I can sleep. - Sure you can.

I'll bet, in two minutes, you are dead to the world.

mumble mumble

Pillow...the pillow over his head..

Pillow.

Fred?

Hmm, he knocked the pillow on the floor.

Pillow.

Pillow?

Yikes!

thud

I wish I knew what's wrong with Fred.

Last night he had a terrible nightmare.

Ran right through the bedroom wall

and didn't come back till early this morning.

Oh, my goodness!

Uh, maybe it's the excitement over his new job.

I hope that's all it is.

Hmm, sounds like the circus is in town.

Look, it's a parade!

[instrumental music]

(Wilma) 'Why, there's Rodney Whetstone.'

The one juggling the knives.

- You know him? - He's an old boyfriend of mine.

I didn't know he was with the circus!

Rodney!

'Yoo-hoo, Rodney.'

'Over here, Rodney.'

Wilma?

Wilma Pebble!

[laughing]

Long time no see, Wilma.

Hello, Rodney.

Betty, this is Rodney Whetstone.

Rodney, meet Betty Rubble.

- Hello. - Pleased to meet you.

Rodney, what are you doing with the circus?

I do a knife throwing act.

Wilma Pebble, it's been years

and you're still as beautiful as ever.

Oh, Rodney!

And I'm not Wilma Pebble anymore.

Now I'm Mrs. Fred Flintstone.

(Rodney) 'Well, I knew some lucky guy would get you, Wilma.'

Where is he? I'll carve my initials in him.

You know, Betty, she broke my heart

when she turned me down.

(Wilma) 'Oh, cut it out, Rodney.'

'I see you haven't changed a bit.'

Look, I have to go now.

But, uh, here are some passes.

Bring your husbands to the circus tonight.

I'd like to meet Fred.

Oh, fine, thank you, Rodney.

Okay, Wilma, see you tonight.

Goodbye.

I still think you're worrying over nothing, Fred.

- Eh, your move. - Nothing?

My own wife slings a cleaver at me

tries to do me in with a pillow.

And you call that nothing?

What does he use to jump with?

A pogo stick?

Well, sir, Barney, I can't help being suspicious of Wilma.

(Barney) 'That's your privilege, Fred.'

But I think Wilma is still the sweet lovable wife

she always was.

Then it's gonna take more than a few attempts

on your life to make me think otherwise.

creak

(Wilma) 'Fred, Barney, look.'

Tickets to the circus tonight.

Hey, where'd you get 'em, Wilma?

A friend of mine who is

with the circus gave 'em to me.

He's a knife thrower.

One of Wilma's old boyfriends.

- Oh, Betty. - Well, he is.

Who is this guy, anyway?

Oh, you never knew him, Fred.

His name is Rodney Whetstone.

Oh, Rodney, Rodney?

Where have I heard that name before?

(Barney) 'In the book Wilma's reading.'

It's the name of the guy that helps the wife kill her husband.

Oh, yeah.

Rodney.

He's anxious to meet you, Fred.

That's one reason we're going to the circus.

Wilma, tell Fred what Rodney said.

[imitating Rodney] Oh, where is he? Ha-ha!

I'll carve my initials in him.

[both laughing]

Come on, Betty, let's go in the kitchen.

Barney, now she's got a knife thrower

to do her dirty work.

(male 2) 'Ladies and gentlemen..'

...Barnacle & Shaley circus..

...now brings you..

...Rodney, The Brave.

[cheering]

Say, Wilma, that Rodney's alright.

He's wonderful!

And now, ladies and gentlemen

I'd like a volunteer from the audience

to be my target.

Somebody brave and trusting.

Preferably somebody with paid up life insurance.

Who will it be, huh?

- Fred, you go. - What? Me?

Sure, after he was nice enough to give us the tickets

it's the least you can do.

Here's a volunteer, Rodney!

Wilma, are you out of your mind?

I'm not letting anybody throw knives at me.

Especially anybody named Rodney, huh, Fred?

Oh, Fred, don't be such a sissy.

Right here, Rodney.

Here's your volunteer.

Rodney, my husband, Fred.

Your husband?

Well, this is a pleasure.

No, no, no.

Fred, you're embarrassing me.

- Go on. - Help! Barney, do something.

Don't worry, Fred. I will.

If he sticks you with a knife

boy, will I boo him!

Not so tight!

Oh, no!

Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time

ten knives at one time.

Yeeoowch!

[audience cheering]

No, no, no, please, please.

And besides, I, uh, I use a cigarette holder.

thud

Rodney's just marvelous!

Yeah, uh, there's a picture of him outside

doing that trick blindfolded.

I wonder if he really does it.

I'll ask him.

Rodney, let's see you

do that trick blindfolded!

Ladies and gentlemen, I've had a request

from a dear friend of mine

to repeat that last trick blindfolded.

clap clap

Would you like to see me try?

- 'Yeah. sure! - 'Go ahead.'

- Very well. - Hey, wait a minute!

Don't I get a say in this?

Now, I haven't practiced this one lately.

So if I miss..

...hope you'll excuse it.

(male 3) 'Don't worry, Rodney!'

'If you miss, just try again!'

Well, here goes.

Oh, boy, this is where I get it.

Wilma's finally found a way to collect the insurance.

But I ain't standin' still for this.

Geronimo!

thud

Barney, last night at the circus was the clincher.

Wilma wants the insurance money

and she don't care how she gets it.

- And I know how to outfox her. - How?

Before she went out, she told me a doctor's coming

to give me a physical examination.

Well, I did some checking.

And I found out the policy isn't in force

until I pass the physical.

'That's my way out.'

I'm not gonna pass the examination.

That way Wilma can't expect any money.

Come on, Barney, here's what we'll do

when the doctor gets here.

[indistinct chatter]

Get set, Fred. Here comes the doctor.

bang bang bang

Come in.

Uh, uh, Mr. Flintstone?

I'm Dr. Pilldown.

I've come to examine you for my company.

Oh, yes.

Ahem.

But it's just a waste of time, doc.

I couldn't be in better shape.

cough

Mr. Flintstone, you still alive?

Oh, it's amazing how he hangs on.

Doctor..

...Pilldown.

This is my nurse.

Yeah, nurse?

Oh-oh, why do you need a nurse, Mr. Flintstone?

What is wrong with you?

(Fred) 'No, oh, nothing.'

'Nothing at all.'

'I feel fine..'

cough

It's, uh, time for your pills, Mr. Flintstone.

(Pilldown) 'What are those pills for?'

What difference does it make?

He's got everything.

Oh, no man can be that sick.

And I'll have to see for myself.

tick tock

I have never heard anything like that before.

Let me...feel your pulse.

There's no pulse!

I don't feel any pulse at all!

That's funny, it was there yesterday.

Or was it the day before?

Well, I'm afraid I'll have to report you

as a bad risk, Mr. Flintstone.

I'm sorry.

Yabba dabba doo!

I flunked the medical!

Oh, yeah, Fred. You sure fooled that doctor.

[imitating Pilldown] I've never heard anything like that before.

[both laughing]

I better do something about that ticker of mine.

Look, Barney, my ticker's set

to wake me up at 7:30.

A-and I thought I'd-I'd keel over when he said

he didn't feel any pulse.

[laughing]

(Fred) 'Yeah.'

When I bring this back to Sam, the tailor

I'm gonna say, "Thanks for the loan of the dummy hand, Sam.

It saved my life."

knock knock knock

- Who is it? - 'Dr. Pilldown.'

cough cough

Come in.

Forgot my stethoscope.

Can't be a doctor without a stethoscope, huh?

Um, yes, you're gonna need that for the next person

you examine for the insurance company.

Insurance company?

I don't work for an insurance company.

No? Then who did you examine me for?

Why, for Conrad Hailstone, of course.

For the job at Stone Valley Inn.

(Fred) 'B-but doctor--'

Which naturally

you are in no condition to take.

- 'See, doctor--' - Good day.

mumble mumble

Oh, Barney, now I am sick.

Pill time!

You mean, you actually thought

I wanted to collect the insurance?

Thanks a lot, Fred.

That's the nicest compliment I've had today.

I am, I'm-I'm sorry, Wilma.

But you gotta admit suspicious things happened.

And with you reading that book--

Oh, Fred.

Well, what would you think

if I started reading about Bluebeard

and then accidents started happening to you?

(Wilma) 'You know something, Fred?'

'You've been watching those horror programs too much.'

It's making you soft in the head.

[chuckles]

Yeah, I guess you're right, Wilma.

Well, I'll tell you what?

No TV tonight.

Instead, if you'll forgive me, sweetheart..

'Fred Flintstone will give a live performance'

'smooching with his wife.'

(Wilma) 'Now, that's the kind of program I like!'

[chuckles]

And you know what, honey?

The repeats are better than the first run.

- Fred. - Yabba...dabba...doo.

[laughing]

[theme song]

? Flintstones meet the Flintstones ?

? They're the modern Stone Age family ?

? From the town of Bedrock ?

? They're a page right out of history ?

? Someday maybe Fred will win the fight ?

? Then that cat will stay out for the night ?

? When you're with the Flintstones ?

? Have a yabba dabba doo time ?

? A dabba doo time ?

? We'll have a gay old time ?

? We'll have a gay old time ??

Wilma!

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