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1
00:00:02,866 --> 00:00:05,733
[humming]
2
00:00:08,933 --> 00:00:11,366
You ever love pancakes
with your syrup?
3
00:00:12,900 --> 00:00:15,833
Oh, shall we talk about
the smiley faces you make
4
00:00:15,900 --> 00:00:18,233
with your raisins in
your cream of wheat?
5
00:00:20,433 --> 00:00:22,766
Tastes better that way.
6
00:00:22,833 --> 00:00:24,333
Look at that.
7
00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:27,733
They finally took that old tired
do‐rag off Aunt Jemima head.
8
00:00:28,333 --> 00:00:29,800
[laughing]
9
00:00:29,866 --> 00:00:33,300
She's got new hairs, and
red lip gloss, ha ha.
10
00:00:33,366 --> 00:00:35,086
Give her a microphone
and a personal trainer
11
00:00:35,110 --> 00:00:36,443
she'd look like Oprah.
12
00:00:38,433 --> 00:00:40,113
Yeah, you know Mrs.
Butterworth could stand
13
00:00:40,166 --> 00:00:41,833
to do a few sit‐ups herself.
14
00:00:43,300 --> 00:00:45,100
[clears throat]
15
00:00:45,166 --> 00:00:46,233
Max, where have you been?
16
00:00:46,300 --> 00:00:47,900
I've been trying to
call you all morning.
17
00:00:47,924 --> 00:00:49,433
Uh, I couldn't find the phone.
18
00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:51,020
You know, I usually
keep it in the sink
19
00:00:51,044 --> 00:00:53,200
but I must have misplaced it.
20
00:00:53,266 --> 00:00:56,600
I need you to write an editorial
for me about the legal system.
21
00:00:59,633 --> 00:01:04,006
Alright, listen, I'd do it
for a free lunch. Okay?
22
00:01:04,073 --> 00:01:06,406
And my picture, at
the top of the page.
23
00:01:06,473 --> 00:01:09,873
I‐I don't know, Khadijah, that
lunch could cost you thousands.
24
00:01:11,506 --> 00:01:12,840
Yep, first things
first, Khadijah.
25
00:01:12,906 --> 00:01:14,073
I mean, what do you want?
26
00:01:14,140 --> 00:01:16,506
Do you want my picture
to be, um, reflective?
27
00:01:16,573 --> 00:01:18,173
[imitates camera click]
28
00:01:19,506 --> 00:01:21,040
Uh, aggressive?
29
00:01:21,106 --> 00:01:23,006
[imitates camera click]
30
00:01:23,073 --> 00:01:24,073
Or scholarly?
31
00:01:24,106 --> 00:01:25,340
[imitates camera click]
32
00:01:25,406 --> 00:01:26,406
This will be the pipe.
33
00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:28,573
[imitates camera click]
34
00:01:32,973 --> 00:01:37,440
♪ We are living single ♪
♪ Hey ♪
35
00:01:37,506 --> 00:01:39,906
♪ Ooh and in a '90s
kind of world ♪
36
00:01:39,973 --> 00:01:42,273
♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪
37
00:01:42,340 --> 00:01:43,616
♪ Oh keep your head up ♪
♪ What? ♪
38
00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:44,982
♪ Keep your head up ♪
♪ That's right ♪
39
00:01:45,006 --> 00:01:46,286
♪ Whenever this life get tough ♪
40
00:01:46,310 --> 00:01:47,310
♪ You gotta fight with ♪
41
00:01:47,340 --> 00:01:48,740
♪ My homegirls
standing to my left ♪
42
00:01:48,807 --> 00:01:49,740
♪ And my right ♪
♪ True blue ♪
43
00:01:49,807 --> 00:01:51,106
♪ It's tight like glue ♪
44
00:01:51,173 --> 00:01:52,973
♪ We are living ♪
♪ Check check check it out ♪
45
00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:54,560
♪ Check check check it out ♪
♪ Single ♪
46
00:01:54,584 --> 00:01:57,373
♪ Do what you want no
free position girl ♪
47
00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:58,440
♪ Ha ♪
48
00:02:03,846 --> 00:02:06,313
[music on TV]
49
00:02:11,180 --> 00:02:15,146
(female on TV) 'Don't die, darling.
I love you.'
50
00:02:15,213 --> 00:02:17,246
'I need you.'
51
00:02:17,313 --> 00:02:20,780
'But you still haven't told me
the combination to the safe.'
52
00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:25,713
(man on TV) 'When you put
it that way, my darlin'.'
53
00:02:25,780 --> 00:02:28,613
'I have one question
I must ask.'
54
00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:30,446
[man coughs]
55
00:02:37,846 --> 00:02:40,313
Hey, Khadijah, what's
another word for..
56
00:02:40,380 --> 00:02:43,846
Oh, gosh, Regine, not that
damn soap of yours again.
57
00:02:43,913 --> 00:02:45,113
Max, move.
58
00:02:45,180 --> 00:02:46,413
Okay, now.
59
00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:49,080
You see the green socks
that the mayor is wearing?
60
00:02:49,146 --> 00:02:51,213
Well, they may not
look important
61
00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:54,946
but see, the mayor of Palo
Alto is very jealous, get it?
62
00:02:55,013 --> 00:02:56,946
Green, envy.
63
00:03:00,580 --> 00:03:02,986
Right, right, right, so
what you're saying is
64
00:03:03,053 --> 00:03:05,420
if he's wearing pink socks
65
00:03:05,486 --> 00:03:08,220
he's wearing a matching
teddy underneath.
66
00:03:08,286 --> 00:03:11,453
Khadijah. Shut up, Khadijah!
67
00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:15,620
My little touches are very
influential to the storylines.
68
00:03:15,686 --> 00:03:17,520
You know, Regine, I used
to think what you did
69
00:03:17,586 --> 00:03:19,120
was really unimportant.
70
00:03:19,186 --> 00:03:20,853
And now I realize I was right.
71
00:03:24,053 --> 00:03:27,620
Argh, I'm mad as beans.
72
00:03:27,686 --> 00:03:29,920
I lost out on another audition.
73
00:03:29,986 --> 00:03:33,520
It was a great play about
the soul music of the '60s
74
00:03:33,586 --> 00:03:36,020
and I would've
played a saxophone.
75
00:03:36,086 --> 00:03:37,986
I didn't know you
played the saxophone.
76
00:03:38,053 --> 00:03:39,120
No.
77
00:03:39,186 --> 00:03:44,053
I would've played a saxophone.
Come on!
78
00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:47,086
The costume fit perfectly
and everything, dang!
79
00:03:47,153 --> 00:03:49,253
So why didn't you get the part?
80
00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:51,620
They gave it to the
director's nephew.
81
00:03:51,686 --> 00:03:53,820
Lawrence Fishburn.
82
00:03:55,386 --> 00:03:58,186
See, how it's all
about who you know?
83
00:03:59,953 --> 00:04:01,060
Well, that's right.
84
00:04:01,126 --> 00:04:04,593
So, do what you did to
get a job at Flavor.
85
00:04:04,660 --> 00:04:07,726
Lie about your ability and
work your connections.
86
00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:12,793
Khadijah, if I'm gonna make it
in the city that doesn't sleep
87
00:04:12,860 --> 00:04:14,560
I'm gonna do it my way.
88
00:04:16,726 --> 00:04:19,226
Of course, now I'm
desperate, you know.
89
00:04:21,293 --> 00:04:24,860
Regine, hook me up
on your soap, girl.
90
00:04:27,393 --> 00:04:30,026
Synclaire, Regine's nothin' but
a sewer machine with a pulse.
91
00:04:31,593 --> 00:04:33,433
So get off your knees
unless you're beggin' her
92
00:04:33,457 --> 00:04:35,293
to hem your skirt.
93
00:04:35,359 --> 00:04:38,693
What this courtroom
jester doesn't understand
94
00:04:38,759 --> 00:04:40,860
is that I am
constantly consulted
95
00:04:40,926 --> 00:04:44,026
on casting, directing
and storylines.
96
00:04:44,093 --> 00:04:45,326
In fact..
97
00:04:45,393 --> 00:04:47,993
[laughs] They wanted
me to design the sets
98
00:04:48,060 --> 00:04:50,493
but I was busy doing
the choreography.
99
00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:54,460
Wow, so you can help me.
100
00:04:54,526 --> 00:04:57,960
Oh, honey, now yes, of course,
I could get you a small part
101
00:04:58,026 --> 00:04:59,493
on the show, but..
102
00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:04,466
What's the point if you're not
ready to take advantage of it?
103
00:05:04,533 --> 00:05:07,233
Now, don't waste your one
shot until you're ready.
104
00:05:08,866 --> 00:05:10,400
You can get up now.
105
00:05:12,866 --> 00:05:15,866
Hey, let's go see that
new 3D Imax ninja film.
106
00:05:15,933 --> 00:05:17,866
One critic said it
was so realistic
107
00:05:17,933 --> 00:05:22,333
he swears a sawed off head
ricocheted off his face.
108
00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:26,166
You know, I heard they give out
barf bags with those tickets.
109
00:05:26,233 --> 00:05:27,966
Oh, let's do this.
110
00:05:28,033 --> 00:05:29,700
Wait a minute, Khadijah.
Wait a minute.
111
00:05:29,766 --> 00:05:31,533
I want you to take a
look at my article.
112
00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:36,000
Move over Bible. This is the
greatest story ever told.
113
00:05:37,433 --> 00:05:39,966
Read it tomorrow. Right
now I wanna see somebody
114
00:05:40,033 --> 00:05:42,400
get their eyes poked
out with chopsticks.
115
00:05:42,466 --> 00:05:44,100
Come on, come on, you know
116
00:05:44,166 --> 00:05:45,726
I'd love to see what
you think about it.
117
00:05:47,933 --> 00:05:50,600
Alright, let me get a pencil.
Uh, let's see.
118
00:05:50,666 --> 00:05:52,500
Ka‐ka‐ka‐ka.
119
00:05:52,566 --> 00:05:53,633
Don't use red at all.
120
00:05:53,700 --> 00:05:55,433
Make my work look like
they're bleeding.
121
00:06:00,340 --> 00:06:02,173
[murmuring]
122
00:06:02,240 --> 00:06:05,006
No! Gosh!
123
00:06:05,073 --> 00:06:07,640
What? I only put in a comma.
124
00:06:07,706 --> 00:06:09,873
But that comma is like a
great big speed bump.
125
00:06:09,940 --> 00:06:13,273
I mean, it slows down
the whole paragraph.
126
00:06:13,340 --> 00:06:15,840
Maxine, how many times
do I have to tell you
127
00:06:15,906 --> 00:06:18,973
slower can be better.
128
00:06:22,540 --> 00:06:23,616
Wait, what's the
matter, Khadijah?
129
00:06:23,640 --> 00:06:24,840
What's the matter? What you..
130
00:06:24,906 --> 00:06:26,640
What you can't see
a, see a pearl
131
00:06:26,706 --> 00:06:28,073
when it's right in front of you?
132
00:06:28,140 --> 00:06:29,473
Max, calm down.
133
00:06:29,540 --> 00:06:31,740
No, no, no, no, no, I don't,
I don't want this to end up
134
00:06:31,764 --> 00:06:34,497
being one of those puff pieces
that fill up your magazine.
135
00:06:36,506 --> 00:06:40,206
You know, you never
could take criticism.
136
00:06:40,273 --> 00:06:42,840
I don't know why I even asked
you to do this assignment.
137
00:06:42,906 --> 00:06:45,340
Who says I can't take criticism?
138
00:06:45,406 --> 00:06:48,740
I enjoy criticism of any kind.
139
00:06:48,806 --> 00:06:50,373
Go ahead, criticize me.
140
00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:53,506
Oh, wait, wait. No, no, no. No.
141
00:06:53,573 --> 00:06:55,140
No.
142
00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:57,740
Please, allow me.
143
00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:05,913
Maxine, you are as
abrasive as sandpaper
144
00:07:05,980 --> 00:07:09,213
as caustic as acid,
and as obnoxious
145
00:07:09,280 --> 00:07:11,746
as only you can be.
146
00:07:11,813 --> 00:07:12,813
[chuckles]
147
00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:14,546
God, that felt good.
148
00:07:16,646 --> 00:07:17,746
'Yes.'
149
00:07:19,813 --> 00:07:22,080
Thank you, Kyle.
150
00:07:22,146 --> 00:07:23,846
Overton, your thoughts.
151
00:07:28,213 --> 00:07:30,813
Well, um, you're cheap and..
152
00:07:32,980 --> 00:07:34,380
You're greedy..
153
00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:36,746
Shallow..
154
00:07:36,813 --> 00:07:38,280
Good. Yeah.
155
00:07:38,346 --> 00:07:41,946
And, um, you've a really
foul mouth for a lady.
156
00:07:42,013 --> 00:07:44,413
But these are all the things
that I've grown to love.
157
00:07:50,613 --> 00:07:52,056
‐ Thank you for sharing.
‐ 'Wait, wait, my turn.'
158
00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:53,546
‐ No, that's it! ‐ No, no, no.
159
00:07:53,613 --> 00:07:55,122
You are stubborn,
hot‐headed, and you reject
160
00:07:55,146 --> 00:07:57,186
other people's opinions even
though you ask for 'em.
161
00:07:57,252 --> 00:07:58,252
‐ Khadijah. ‐ What?
162
00:07:58,286 --> 00:07:59,313
Who asked you?
163
00:08:01,153 --> 00:08:03,620
And that's why I think this
show has lost its edge.
164
00:08:03,686 --> 00:08:04,953
Now I say that Desiree
165
00:08:05,020 --> 00:08:07,053
and the oceanographer
get married
166
00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:10,353
and then they discover that
they have matching birthmarks
167
00:08:10,420 --> 00:08:14,186
and are actually brother
and sister. Pow!
168
00:08:14,253 --> 00:08:18,120
Regine, I think that's exactly
the fix this show needs.
169
00:08:18,186 --> 00:08:19,486
Well, I gotta go.
170
00:08:19,553 --> 00:08:22,220
Somebody's gotta make
those toilet bowls blue.
171
00:08:24,420 --> 00:08:25,686
‐ Little darlin'. ‐ Yes?
172
00:08:25,753 --> 00:08:28,153
I do hate to be a raccoon
under a hoop skirt
173
00:08:28,220 --> 00:08:31,286
but, uh, it seems somebody
shrunk my jacket.
174
00:08:31,353 --> 00:08:35,420
Ohh. Yeah, it is a
bit snug, isn't it?
175
00:08:35,486 --> 00:08:38,520
Perhaps you inadvertently
left something in your pocket
176
00:08:38,586 --> 00:08:40,253
a pound cake perhaps?
177
00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,620
[chuckles]
178
00:08:41,686 --> 00:08:43,420
Now, you know a
slab of pound cake
179
00:08:43,486 --> 00:08:45,686
wouldn't stand a chance of
making it to my pocket.
180
00:08:45,753 --> 00:08:46,953
[laughs]
181
00:08:48,086 --> 00:08:49,753
Oh. Wait a second.
182
00:08:51,496 --> 00:08:52,496
[grunts]
183
00:08:52,520 --> 00:08:54,120
‐ Ahh.. ‐ Voila!
184
00:08:54,186 --> 00:08:55,820
The mayor's buttonless tuxedo.
185
00:08:55,886 --> 00:08:59,420
I'm happier than a termite in
a furniture factory. Ha ha!
186
00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:05,926
Regine, did you
finish the ironing?
187
00:09:05,993 --> 00:09:07,073
Another scorch in the pile.
188
00:09:07,097 --> 00:09:09,060
Right, because we
have an emergency.
189
00:09:09,126 --> 00:09:11,593
Bambi, America's favorite
little tramp nun
190
00:09:11,660 --> 00:09:14,193
is undergoing yet
another boob job.
191
00:09:14,260 --> 00:09:16,193
My God, what is the
woman trying to do?
192
00:09:16,260 --> 00:09:18,926
Nurse an entire orphanage?
193
00:09:18,993 --> 00:09:22,860
So let out the nun's habit
and hand wash these hose.
194
00:09:25,260 --> 00:09:26,626
[Regine sighs]
195
00:09:26,693 --> 00:09:28,760
(Regine) 'Oh, hello, Mr. Pharr.'
196
00:09:28,826 --> 00:09:30,760
I was watching the
monitor this morning
197
00:09:30,826 --> 00:09:33,926
and I thought that you directed
that last scene beautifully.
198
00:09:33,993 --> 00:09:37,893
Wardrobe person, I have these
dreadfully sweaty feet.
199
00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:39,093
I'm gonna need more of these
200
00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:43,360
size six and a half, extra charcoal.
Thank you.
201
00:09:45,393 --> 00:09:47,260
Guess who?
202
00:09:47,326 --> 00:09:49,360
Synclaire? What are
you doing here?
203
00:09:49,426 --> 00:09:51,546
I heard what you said last
night about not coming here
204
00:09:51,570 --> 00:09:52,760
until I was ready.
205
00:09:52,826 --> 00:09:55,693
And then I realized you
were just testing me.
206
00:09:57,260 --> 00:10:00,026
Synclaire, I'm not that deep.
Go home.
207
00:10:00,093 --> 00:10:04,766
Oh, snap. That's your close
personal pal, Otto Pharr.
208
00:10:04,833 --> 00:10:06,900
‐ Mr. Pharr! Mr. Pharr! ‐ Oh..
209
00:10:06,966 --> 00:10:10,200
Hi, I'm Synclaire,
Regine's friend.
210
00:10:10,266 --> 00:10:11,700
Who's Regine?
211
00:10:19,900 --> 00:10:21,933
Who is Regine?
212
00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:25,200
(male ♫1) 'Hey, Otto, you've got
ex‐wives on three and four.'
213
00:10:28,533 --> 00:10:30,466
[laughs]
214
00:10:32,333 --> 00:10:33,333
"Who is Regine?"
215
00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:34,433
[both laughing]
216
00:10:34,500 --> 00:10:37,166
Boy, that is his
favorite little joke.
217
00:10:37,233 --> 00:10:39,166
Oh, that's funny.
That's funny, girl.
218
00:10:39,233 --> 00:10:40,666
Yeah. And you know
219
00:10:40,733 --> 00:10:43,633
he always acts like I'm
not his right hand.
220
00:10:43,700 --> 00:10:47,366
‐ I know. I know. ‐ Hey!
You got me again, Otto!
221
00:10:47,433 --> 00:10:50,466
‐ Ooh, yeah. ‐ Alright, so, um..
222
00:10:50,533 --> 00:10:52,766
Hey, it was a pleasure
for you to come down.
223
00:10:52,833 --> 00:10:54,533
Always lovely to see you.
Bye‐bye.
224
00:10:54,600 --> 00:10:56,266
Oh, I just wanna be here
225
00:10:56,333 --> 00:10:59,773
and see the sights and
hear the sounds and..
226
00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:01,273
[sniffing]
227
00:11:01,340 --> 00:11:03,973
Smell the foot? Ooh.
228
00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:05,540
Synclaire, please.
229
00:11:05,606 --> 00:11:09,340
Okay, fine. I'll just tell
everybody you couldn't help me.
230
00:11:10,673 --> 00:11:13,806
Alright, alright, alright,
just, um, don't touch anything
231
00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:15,940
and, and don't talk to anybody.
232
00:11:16,006 --> 00:11:18,340
In fact, you know, you'll
really get a feel of the place
233
00:11:18,406 --> 00:11:20,046
if you just stand right
outside that door.
234
00:11:20,070 --> 00:11:20,906
[chuckles] Oh.
235
00:11:20,973 --> 00:11:22,506
(Otto) 'Places, everyone!'
236
00:11:22,573 --> 00:11:24,873
Oh, this is so exciting!
237
00:11:24,940 --> 00:11:28,573
(Otto) 'And action!'
238
00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:32,973
It seems that one of my
fine fellow Palo Altoens
239
00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:37,873
planted an exploding crouton
in my spinach salad.
240
00:11:37,940 --> 00:11:40,740
Care to comment, Brooksie Fuller
241
00:11:40,806 --> 00:11:44,940
doorman at the Palo Alto
Spa, Hotel And Golf Resort?
242
00:11:45,006 --> 00:11:47,340
Hate to disappoint
you, Mayor Pond
243
00:11:47,406 --> 00:11:49,440
but your wife did it.
244
00:11:49,506 --> 00:11:51,106
How would you know that?
245
00:11:51,173 --> 00:11:54,406
Unless you were still
sleeping with her.
246
00:11:54,473 --> 00:11:57,973
You're right, but
you're also wrong.
247
00:11:58,040 --> 00:12:00,713
I'm not sleeping with
your wife, Charlene
248
00:12:00,780 --> 00:12:03,913
I'm sleeping with
Jolene, your dead wife.
249
00:12:03,980 --> 00:12:05,913
[instrumental music]
250
00:12:07,213 --> 00:12:09,446
(Otto) 'And we're clear!'
251
00:12:12,046 --> 00:12:13,980
[screaming]
252
00:12:15,746 --> 00:12:20,113
So, you‐you know Regine, the
wardrobe woman who cast you?
253
00:12:20,180 --> 00:12:21,613
‐ Who? ‐ Regine.
254
00:12:21,680 --> 00:12:23,120
‐ 'Who's Regine?' ‐
That's my friend.
255
00:12:23,186 --> 00:12:24,753
‐ My friend, Regine ‐ Synclaire.
256
00:12:24,820 --> 00:12:26,380
What did I tell you?
257
00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:27,966
I was talking to a
couple of the actors
258
00:12:27,990 --> 00:12:30,446
and nobody seems to know you.
259
00:12:30,513 --> 00:12:33,033
Well, that's 'cause most of them
have such big drinking problems
260
00:12:33,057 --> 00:12:34,713
that they don't even
know who they are.
261
00:12:34,780 --> 00:12:35,780
Oh.
262
00:12:36,980 --> 00:12:38,880
Oh, there's Otto Pharr again.
263
00:12:38,946 --> 00:12:40,446
You know, I‐I'm
gonna talk to him
264
00:12:40,513 --> 00:12:41,780
and give him my resume, okay?
265
00:12:41,846 --> 00:12:43,913
Wait! Um, let me do it.
266
00:12:43,980 --> 00:12:45,646
Uh, he's a bit eccentric
about the height
267
00:12:45,713 --> 00:12:47,033
of the people that
he speaks with.
268
00:12:47,057 --> 00:12:49,680
‐ Oh. ‐ Stay. And I mean stay.
269
00:12:49,746 --> 00:12:51,046
Okay.
270
00:12:53,013 --> 00:12:55,380
‐ What did I tell you here? ‐
I'll take a note on it, okay?
271
00:12:55,446 --> 00:12:58,413
‐ Okay, the note is ready?
‐ I'm on my way.
272
00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,520
I'm on my way.
273
00:13:00,586 --> 00:13:02,220
Will you have your
people call my people?
274
00:13:02,286 --> 00:13:03,986
I'm sorry, but
I'm‐I'm on a break.
275
00:13:04,053 --> 00:13:05,453
I'm not listening,
I'm not listening
276
00:13:05,477 --> 00:13:07,711
I'm eating, I'm eating my lunch.
277
00:13:10,020 --> 00:13:13,020
He says that now is not a good
time to interview actresses
278
00:13:13,086 --> 00:13:14,953
and he finds your
height disturbing.
279
00:13:15,020 --> 00:13:16,540
But he will definitely
keep you in mind
280
00:13:16,564 --> 00:13:18,253
the next time he's
casting your type.
281
00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:21,720
Oh, well, that's great.
Um, what's my type?
282
00:13:21,786 --> 00:13:23,653
Remember the best
friend in "Flashdance?"
283
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:25,486
‐ Uh, no. ‐ That's your type.
284
00:13:25,553 --> 00:13:27,233
‐ Okay. Thanks very much.
‐ You're welcome.
285
00:13:28,453 --> 00:13:29,753
Mr. Pharr..
286
00:13:32,086 --> 00:13:33,386
Hi.
287
00:13:33,453 --> 00:13:35,120
I'm, uh, I'm Regine's roommate
288
00:13:35,186 --> 00:13:37,486
and I just wanna thank you so
much for your consideration.
289
00:13:37,553 --> 00:13:39,886
I'm gonna go out tonight
and rent "Flashdance."
290
00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:43,653
Again I ask, who is Regine?
291
00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:45,560
Oh, you're gonna run that
joke into the ground.
292
00:13:45,584 --> 00:13:47,320
[laughs]
293
00:13:47,386 --> 00:13:48,620
Oh, no, it's no joke.
294
00:13:48,686 --> 00:13:51,653
Hey, does anyone here
know who Regine is?
295
00:13:53,986 --> 00:13:55,920
Right there.
296
00:13:55,986 --> 00:13:58,820
Oh, the odor eater girl.
297
00:13:58,886 --> 00:14:01,660
Come here. I forgot
to give you this one.
298
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,026
Thank you. You
should have said so.
299
00:14:09,260 --> 00:14:12,493
Um, um, uh, Regine,
you know something
300
00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:15,193
I must be in your way here.
You are just so busy.
301
00:14:15,260 --> 00:14:17,860
Girl, I'm gonna see you
at home later on, okay?
302
00:14:17,926 --> 00:14:19,260
Okay, okay, bye.
303
00:14:25,460 --> 00:14:29,460
Ooh. Halle Berry is
JFK's lovechild.
304
00:14:30,593 --> 00:14:33,460
Baltimore Browns.
It sounds stupid.
305
00:14:33,526 --> 00:14:35,493
I'm telling you, man.
306
00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:36,726
Hey, what's up, Khadijah?
307
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:38,226
Well, you know, if they had a‐‐.
308
00:14:38,293 --> 00:14:41,460
Uh! Uh‐uh‐uh!
309
00:14:41,526 --> 00:14:42,960
‐ Uh‐uh. ‐ What?
310
00:14:44,926 --> 00:14:46,460
Where are you going?
311
00:14:46,526 --> 00:14:48,260
Hey, we just thought
we'd pull up a chair
312
00:14:48,326 --> 00:14:50,493
and mangle some of that
leftover meatloaf.
313
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:54,493
Can you please make it to go?
314
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:57,293
I finally have the
house to myself.
315
00:14:57,360 --> 00:15:00,300
Just you and the "Man‐eating
mushrooms in Kansas?"
316
00:15:01,433 --> 00:15:04,866
Look, I deal with
the facts all day.
317
00:15:04,933 --> 00:15:07,400
Plus, they said the
farmer's wife is missing.
318
00:15:07,466 --> 00:15:08,766
Hmm.
319
00:15:08,833 --> 00:15:10,433
Alright, cool. We'll
get the meatloaf
320
00:15:10,500 --> 00:15:12,633
we get some Cajun rice,
we get some A1 sauce
321
00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:14,300
we get some hot sauce. Mm, boy.
322
00:15:15,133 --> 00:15:17,233
Khadijah?
323
00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:19,666
I did some fine‐tuning
on this article.
324
00:15:19,733 --> 00:15:22,633
I even put in that
comma you suggested
325
00:15:22,700 --> 00:15:23,966
in a different spot.
326
00:15:26,100 --> 00:15:27,740
I'm sure it's fine.
I'll read it tomorrow.
327
00:15:27,764 --> 00:15:31,066
No, tomorrow it'll cool
off, right now it's hot.
328
00:15:31,133 --> 00:15:32,933
Listen to this.
329
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:35,866
"The American justice system
has been on trial recently
330
00:15:35,933 --> 00:15:38,766
"with the high profile cases
of the rich and famous.
331
00:15:38,833 --> 00:15:41,233
"The judicial process has
been placed under scrutiny
332
00:15:41,300 --> 00:15:43,033
"thanks to the
celebrated lawsuits
333
00:15:43,100 --> 00:15:45,466
"of the wealthy and
the well‐known.
334
00:15:45,533 --> 00:15:48,100
But most Americans.." What
the hell are you doing?
335
00:15:49,666 --> 00:15:51,266
I'm just making a note.
336
00:15:51,333 --> 00:15:52,613
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, Max
337
00:15:52,637 --> 00:15:54,866
I believe I know what
Khadijah just jotted down.
338
00:15:54,933 --> 00:15:58,133
Baby, you have to use simple,
down‐to‐earth words.
339
00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:01,140
That way your article will be
less odious and pernicious
340
00:16:01,206 --> 00:16:02,940
and far more mellifluous.
341
00:16:05,073 --> 00:16:10,006
Kyle, nobody cares that you
got 1420 on your SATs.
342
00:16:11,973 --> 00:16:13,773
It's just that
343
00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:17,140
wealthy and well‐known
sound a little corny.
344
00:16:17,206 --> 00:16:21,240
Starting two words with the same
letter is catchy and contagious.
345
00:16:21,306 --> 00:16:23,673
It's‐it's‐it's resonant
and it's rhythmic.
346
00:16:23,740 --> 00:16:25,506
It's funky and I'm fixin' it.
347
00:16:27,740 --> 00:16:30,573
You know, you're no editor.
You're a pencil‐whipping freak.
348
00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:32,006
You know, and you're
a prima donna
349
00:16:32,073 --> 00:16:33,706
with a chip on your shoulder
350
00:16:33,773 --> 00:16:35,640
and a ketchup stain
on your shirt.
351
00:16:35,706 --> 00:16:37,073
Made you look.
352
00:16:38,306 --> 00:16:39,986
‐ Khadijah, you are the
most‐‐ ‐ Oh, you‐‐.
353
00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:41,473
Excuse me, excuse me, but do you
354
00:16:41,540 --> 00:16:43,973
really need this, uh,
second sentence?
355
00:16:44,040 --> 00:16:44,973
What?
356
00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:45,973
Well, I think if you just
357
00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:47,240
get rid of this whole sentence
358
00:16:47,264 --> 00:16:49,464
the rest of it flows
quite nicely.
359
00:16:53,773 --> 00:16:58,706
‐ That is sharper. ‐ Yeah. Yeah.
360
00:16:58,773 --> 00:17:01,346
And gets me to the third
sentence on the page
361
00:17:01,413 --> 00:17:02,780
which is my favorite.
362
00:17:04,113 --> 00:17:06,680
And I said the same
thing five minutes ago.
363
00:17:06,746 --> 00:17:09,446
Excuse me for being
sesquipedalian.
364
00:17:12,280 --> 00:17:14,113
Kyle, tell me you
know what that means.
365
00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:18,013
[laughing]
366
00:17:19,813 --> 00:17:21,146
Look it up.
367
00:17:29,213 --> 00:17:31,080
I thought you went home.
368
00:17:31,146 --> 00:17:33,646
Well, um, I was at the
bus stop, and I noticed
369
00:17:33,713 --> 00:17:35,980
that the drug store was
having a sale on odor eaters
370
00:17:36,046 --> 00:17:38,180
and Mr. Pharr seems
like the kind of man
371
00:17:38,246 --> 00:17:39,526
that goes through a lot of them.
372
00:17:41,313 --> 00:17:44,013
By the way, um
373
00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:46,980
your real status here,
I‐it's our little secret.
374
00:17:47,046 --> 00:17:48,213
[scoffs] Great.
375
00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:50,360
If there's anything I don't
need is pity from a woman
376
00:17:50,384 --> 00:17:53,184
who buys her clothes and
groceries from the same place.
377
00:17:56,146 --> 00:17:59,313
Usually when someone gets
caught in a web of lies
378
00:17:59,380 --> 00:18:02,320
they feel shame and guilt,
but not you, Regine.
379
00:18:02,386 --> 00:18:05,220
You go to your favorite
place, dissing my outfits.
380
00:18:07,353 --> 00:18:08,453
I'm sorry.
381
00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:11,420
About dogging my outfit?
382
00:18:11,486 --> 00:18:13,053
No, I hate that outfit.
383
00:18:14,853 --> 00:18:17,853
I'm sorry I led you to believe I
could do something for you here.
384
00:18:19,653 --> 00:18:22,853
I just don't understand
why you lied.
385
00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:24,286
I don't know.
386
00:18:24,353 --> 00:18:26,653
I guess I've spent
so much of my life
387
00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:31,986
creating this fabulous image
that it's a hard habit to break.
388
00:18:32,053 --> 00:18:33,613
Yeah, well, you do
always make your life
389
00:18:33,637 --> 00:18:35,686
sound like some grand movie.
390
00:18:35,753 --> 00:18:40,086
"Regine," starring
Regine as Regine.
391
00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:42,753
And you know what the truth is?
392
00:18:42,820 --> 00:18:45,686
I really am okay
with what I'm doing.
393
00:18:45,753 --> 00:18:47,120
It's like
394
00:18:47,186 --> 00:18:50,720
when the creases on the
mayor's pants are razor sharp
395
00:18:50,786 --> 00:18:52,720
then I feel like I've
done my small part
396
00:18:52,786 --> 00:18:55,620
in entertaining 13
million people.
397
00:18:55,686 --> 00:18:58,786
Well, 15 million if
there's an evil twin.
398
00:18:58,853 --> 00:19:00,926
But..
399
00:19:00,993 --> 00:19:02,760
And I can't believe
I'm saying this..
400
00:19:04,926 --> 00:19:06,626
I'm a grunt, and I love it.
401
00:19:08,293 --> 00:19:11,493
You just need to stop worrying
about what people say about you.
402
00:19:11,560 --> 00:19:14,160
I mean, look at me, I don't
give a damn what people say.
403
00:19:16,693 --> 00:19:18,060
Clearly.
404
00:19:19,393 --> 00:19:20,760
What? Are people
saying bad things?
405
00:19:20,826 --> 00:19:22,626
‐ What are they saying about me?
‐ No, no, no!
406
00:19:22,650 --> 00:19:24,184
Girl, no! No!
407
00:19:24,793 --> 00:19:26,493
No.
408
00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:28,093
Not everybody.
409
00:19:30,360 --> 00:19:32,326
Hey, what happened? I
just pressed that.
410
00:19:32,393 --> 00:19:34,893
Well, one of the extras
patted Otto on the head
411
00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:37,426
and said, "Thanks for
the gig, small fry."
412
00:19:37,493 --> 00:19:38,926
[snaps fingers]
Fired on the spot.
413
00:19:41,526 --> 00:19:44,426
Hey, um, if we threw somebody
into that wardrobe quickly
414
00:19:44,493 --> 00:19:45,693
you think we can get them on?
415
00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:47,680
Yeah, but they're setting
up that shot right now.
416
00:19:48,693 --> 00:19:49,726
Synclaire, you're on.
417
00:19:49,793 --> 00:19:52,060
Oh, my chance, my
chance, my chance!
418
00:19:52,126 --> 00:19:54,860
Now, honey, you got one
minute to get into makeup.
419
00:19:54,926 --> 00:19:59,060
Oh, Regine, I'm gonna do
your creases proud, girl.
420
00:19:59,126 --> 00:20:00,666
Hey, break a leg.
421
00:20:02,766 --> 00:20:05,300
I'm ready for my close‐up, Mr.
Pharr.
422
00:20:09,166 --> 00:20:11,133
Finally we are both happy
with this article.
423
00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:12,233
Yes, yes, you know
424
00:20:12,300 --> 00:20:14,300
and I actually had
fun working on this.
425
00:20:14,366 --> 00:20:19,066
Hey, how about this? How about
an all‐legal issue of Flavor?
426
00:20:20,633 --> 00:20:22,866
Max, do you really think
the world is ready
427
00:20:22,933 --> 00:20:24,366
for that kind of boredom?
428
00:20:26,633 --> 00:20:27,633
‐ Hi. ‐ 'Hey, hey, hey.'
429
00:20:27,666 --> 00:20:28,666
Hey.
430
00:20:28,733 --> 00:20:30,173
How'd everything go
down at the soap?
431
00:20:30,197 --> 00:20:32,666
Wonderfully, once my
highly‐influential
432
00:20:32,733 --> 00:20:35,300
well‐connected friend,
Regine, here hooked me up.
433
00:20:35,366 --> 00:20:36,846
How much did that
sawed‐off seamstress
434
00:20:36,870 --> 00:20:38,966
pay you to put on this act?
435
00:20:39,033 --> 00:20:41,866
Excuse you, Ms. Missy,
but thanks to Regine.
436
00:20:41,933 --> 00:20:44,100
Synclaire James finally
got her big break.
437
00:20:44,166 --> 00:20:46,133
I was an extra.
438
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,866
Thank you very much.
Thank you very much.
439
00:20:48,933 --> 00:20:53,533
Really? Wow, good
lookin' out, Regine.
440
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:56,600
‐ Actually, it wasn't
all that‐‐ ‐ Hard.
441
00:20:56,666 --> 00:20:59,026
It wasn't all that hard for
Regine to do that kind of thing.
442
00:20:59,050 --> 00:21:00,757
She practically runs the place.
443
00:21:01,873 --> 00:21:03,740
Ooh.
444
00:21:03,806 --> 00:21:05,073
You know, I would love to do
445
00:21:05,140 --> 00:21:06,840
a behind the scenes
story on you.
446
00:21:09,206 --> 00:21:10,973
(Maxine) Don't go away.
We'll be right back.
447
00:21:15,997 --> 00:21:17,530
[instrumental music]
448
00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:22,863
(Otto) 'Cut! Cut!'
449
00:21:24,530 --> 00:21:26,230
What is the Grim Reaper doing
450
00:21:26,297 --> 00:21:29,163
boogalooing and
drinking champagne?
451
00:21:29,230 --> 00:21:32,330
Well, now, wouldn't he celebrate
being the messenger of death?
452
00:21:32,397 --> 00:21:33,630
[laughs] You know..
453
00:21:37,063 --> 00:21:38,630
[instrumental music]
454
00:21:43,030 --> 00:21:45,063
(Otto) 'Cut! Cut! Cut!'
455
00:21:45,130 --> 00:21:47,430
Oh, come on, now, I hooked
him just like you said.
456
00:21:47,497 --> 00:21:50,297
Well, I told you to
wait for your cue.
457
00:21:50,363 --> 00:21:52,430
Now, I believe the
messenger of death
458
00:21:52,497 --> 00:21:54,130
will go for the
element of surprise.
459
00:21:54,197 --> 00:21:55,697
[groaning]
460
00:21:57,930 --> 00:21:59,463
He's ornery, isn't he?
461
00:22:01,937 --> 00:22:03,503
[instrumental music]
462
00:22:06,437 --> 00:22:08,137
Woo woo woo!
463
00:22:08,970 --> 00:22:10,370
Woo woo woo!
464
00:22:10,437 --> 00:22:13,603
Cut! That was great!
465
00:22:13,670 --> 00:22:15,150
I don't know what
that woo woo woo was
466
00:22:15,203 --> 00:22:16,870
but boy, it chilled
me to the bone!
467
00:22:16,937 --> 00:22:18,737
‐ Woo woo woo! ‐ Woo woo woo!
468
00:22:18,803 --> 00:22:20,603
Come on, let's get a beer.
Come on, let's go.
469
00:22:20,670 --> 00:22:22,870
‐ That's a wrap. ‐ You're good, man.
You're good.
470
00:22:24,403 --> 00:22:25,937
(Regine) Woo‐hoo!
471
00:22:26,003 --> 00:22:27,103
[Regine chuckles]
35066
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