All language subtitles for Living Single - S02 E23 - Who s Scooping Who (480p - HULU Web-DL)

See, first I type in her
name and her phone number.

And where we had our first date,
so I can wax romantically

on the second date. And
then I press enter.

Well, you forgot to put in how
many pieces of candy it took

to get her into the car.

Well, at least I don't have to
lure my dates with raw meat.

Smooches, everyone.

You will never guess what
happened to me today.

I was window shopping
on Fifth Avenue

spending thousands, in my head.

When I saw this.

Regine, you will never
fit into that dress.

It's called the Cherine doll.

Doesn't it look like me?

[indistinct chatter]

You say the same thing
about Whitney Houston.

I do look like Whitney Houston.

You know, all the time people
confuse me with Montel.

Yeah, people just chasing
me down the street

telling me their business.

You'll be surprised how
many dyslexic transsexuals

want to adopt.

No, you guys, Cherine
is based on me.

I dated this guy at Wishco, the
toy company that makes these.

Obviously when he met
me, he made the mold.

Regine, that's nothing
but a Barbie doll

dipped in chocolate. Here.

Cherine is me. If you..

Look, she has got six
interchangeable wigs.

If you don't believe me,
just listen to Cherine.

(Cherine) Smooches.

[indistinct chatter]

[Queen Latifah singing
"Living Single"]

♪ We are living single ♪

♪ Oo in the 90's kinda world ♪

♪ I'm glad I got my girls ♪

♪ Keep ya head up. What? Keep
ya head up, that's right ♪

♪ Whenever this life get
tough ya gotta fight with ♪

♪ Ma homegirls standin'
to ma left and ma right ♪

♪ True blue We tight like glue ♪

♪ We are living single ♪

Cherine is so beautiful
and glamorous.

She could whoop Barbie's
flat behind any day.

Yes, you can. Yes, you can.

Regine, you have been cooing
over that doll all day.

Now, you put it away
or it loses a limb.

She's just jealous because
the only thing on the market

that she resembles is a
multi‐strand floor mop.

[both laughing]

Well, can't we just meet
and talk for five minutes?

Well, thanks a lot.

Who was that?

Remember I told you about
that story I was doing

on a boxing promoter that
was fixing his fights.

No.

You were eating pancakes
with blueberry syrup.

Oh, yeah, King Davis. Yes, yes.

I had one good source
and Marcus Hughes

from the Village Voice snatched
him right out from under me.

Khadijah, I'm no reporter.

Why don't you just walk up
to this King Davis fellow

and go, "Hey, there, now. You're
fixing fights. Come clean."

Synclaire, King Davis has 84
arrests and no convictions.

I'm afraid he's too crafty even
for your sophisticated approach.

I gotta nail this story, man.

This is the kinda thing that
wins awards and boosts sales.

Well, if you really wanna
boost sales, you should

get a hold of those
naked Brad Pitt photos.

You know we don't print
that kinda stuff.

Well, could you get 'em anyway?

[indistinct chatter]

[buzzer buzzing]

‐ Oh, nice shot. ‐ I'm
also good at distance.

Excuse me. Mind if I ask
you a couple questions?

Oh. You a manager?

‐ No, I'm a reporter.
‐ No comment.

Hey, have you ever
worked with King Davis?

‐ Are you a reporter? ‐ Yeah.

Unless you're from
Good Housekeeping

and you're here for my
linguini and clam sauce recipe

take yourself a walk.

Hey, are you really a reporter?

Khadijah James, Flavor Magazine.

I'm doing a story on King Davis.
Can I ask you a few questions?

‐ Fire away, yes. ‐ Alright.

Well, for starters, how
long you been boxing?

‐ Counting today? ‐ Mm‐hm.

Never.

So what do you do here?

Actually I do the same thing as you.
Only, I do it better.

Marcus Hughes. Village Voice.

I knew that.

Right. You thought I
was a boxer, girl.

Please, you're too scrawny.
Even I could take you down.

Now, Miss James, we just met.

Just because you're a good
reporter and have a nice smile

doesn't mean you're gonna beat
me to this King Davis story.

So... you think I
have a nice smile?

I don't know. I've‐I've never
seen a weasel smile until now.

H‐h‐hold on. Hold on.
Hold on. I'm sorry.

We got off on the wrong foot.

I know you. I've read your stuff.
It's good.

Just a tip. When you
thought I was a boxer

there's one question you
should've asked me.

What was that?

You should've asked
me out to dinner.

That way, I could have said yes.

So I'm gonna pick you
up around eight.

Why would I go out with
a perpetrator like you?

Because you like me.

And I find that very attractive.

Say, where you live?

You're the reporter.
You figure it out.

This is ridiculous. We can
never agree on where to go.

Why don't we go out to
that new multiplex theater

slash video arcade
slash megamall?

I mean that way
Regine could shop.

Thank you.

Synclaire and I
could see a movie.

And Max can partake

of the largest
international food court

in the tri‐state area.

Hey‐hey, people.

Regine... did you know,
according to The Journal

your Cherine doll's become
quite a hot selling item?

Naturally.

Hey, if this doll is
really based on you

you could be getting
cheated out of millions.

I'm telling you, girl,
you should sue.

Millions? That's our
favorite number.

Good for you, Regine.

Corporate America is
always trying to cash in

on somebody else's brainchild.
They even tried to do it to me.

Ha ha. Right. When?

That hair‐cutting
vacuum, the Flowbee.

Rhymes with Obie.

Coincidence? I think not.

Hey, peeps.

Khadijah, any new leads
on the boxing story?

Nope, but I did run
into Marcus Hughes.

Oh, yeah? What's he like?

Well, he's arrogant.
He is conniving.

He would sell his own
mother to get a story.

And I'm havin' dinner
with him tonight.

Careful. He may just
be taking you out

to pump you for information.

Ha ha ha. While he thinks
he's picking my brain

I'll be getting him for
everything he knows.

Your lips might be saying
that this is business

but that cheap lip gloss
is sayin' it's a date.

Is he fun?

Well, you know he's kind
of on the tasty side.

See, see, this just
proves my point.

Women are always talking
about they want a nice guy.

In the end, they go for looks.

And when they want a break
from both, they date you.

Don't you have a
car to go chase?

[barks]

[knocking on door]

‐ Hey, what's going on? ‐ Hi.

Everyone, this is Marcus Hughes.

‐ Hey, how you doing, man?
‐ How you doing, bro?

Hey, alright, alright.
Call me, girl.

Synclaire James. I'm in
the news game myself.

Tsk tsk.

So, Marcus have you heard
about the Cherine phenomenon?

‐ The who? ‐ You
better recognize.

Well, um, this is a real
nice place you got here.

‐ Khadijah, this is very you.
‐ You don't even know me.

Oh, sure I do.

You're independent but you're
driven by a fear of failure.

You like to give advice, but you
can't admit when you're wrong.

And you're a bit of a control freak.
Am I right?

‐ Not even close. ‐ Mm‐hm.

Now, look, can we get off of
me and get on something else?

Something interesting,
like King Davis.

Oh, no, no. I don't
wanna depress you.

I got that boxing story
already locked up.

Don't worry. Someday
you'll have a chance

to crack something this big.

And I'll be off, covering
something bigger.

‐ Ha ha. Like your head. ‐ Oh ho.
That was a good one.

You know, there's a question
I've been dying to ask you.

Where's your restroom?

Oh, upstairs, first
door on the right.

And don't be poking around
my medicine cabinet either.

[beeping]

"King Davis. Newark Airport, gate 50.
Tonight."

Hey, you ready to go?

Uh, yeah, but look, we can't
stay out too late tonight

'cause I really gotta
get an early start.

Oh, you sure are dedicated.

We could use somebody
like you at the Voice.

I mean, if I didn't
already work there.

You know, we can use someone
like you at Flavor.

Well, if we didn't
already have a janitor.

Listen to me, if you cannot meet
our needs, we will have to find

another supplier. Now I'm
gonna go over it again.

Two large pizzas, no anchovies.
Alright?

Synclaire, get off that phone.

And in less than 30 minutes
because I have a coupon.

And why are you so grumpy?

I'm sorry. It's that
damn Marcus Hughes.

He sent me on a false lead

and I spent half the
night at Newark Airport.

So he told you to go
somewhere and you went?

No. He went to the bathroom
and called his own beeper.

Left me a bogus tip. It's the
oldest trick in the book.

Well, now, Khadijah.

It couldn't possibly be the
oldest trick in the book.

Beepers have not been
around that long.

Khadijah, Khadijah.

I had such a good
time last night

I was inspired to write you a poem.
It goes like this.

The white zone is for
immediate loading

and unloading of
passengers only.

Oh, baby, come on. Look,
an "I love you" troll.

You do care, don't you?

I can't believe you
set me up like that.

Don't get all salty
because you fell

for the oldest
trick in the book.

I stand corrected.

You know, I've had just
about enough of you.

‐ It's time for you to go.
‐ Okay, I'll go.

But you'll be
thinking about me..

Specially when my story
hits the stands.

Well, not before mine.
You goin' down, Hughes.

‐ You goin' down! ‐ Okay.
Bye bye.

‐ Can you believe that guy!
‐ I know.

He just walked outta here
with my favorite troll.

I gotta break this story
before Marcus does.

There must be something
in these notes I missed.

(Cherine) Smooches.

What are you three
gals doin' here?

I'm going to be rich.
Wooo‐hoo‐hoo‐hoo!

Wishco and I have reached a
settlement on the Cherine doll.

You know how we always thought

that Regine would never
amount to anything?

‐ Yeah. Mm‐hm. ‐ Okay.

Well, it turns out she's
worth 595 per unit.

Well..

Now you don't have to be bitter
about Anna Nicole Smith anymore.

See, you don't have
to make your fortune

by marrying some old geezer.

That was a private
rivalry, Khadijah.

Anyway, I owe it all to the
legal genius of my best friend.

Right now, I'm your lawyer.

If you want me to be your
friend, put me on retainer.

Come on, you guys. Let's go.

‐ Lunch is on Cherine.
‐ Oh, I can't.

I gotta go back to the gym
and crack this boxing story.

Oh, Khadijah, can I come with?

Look... this fight
is a one‐on‐one

between me and Marcus.

Alright. Well, look
at it this way.

You can either have
me by your side

which would keep your eye on me

or here, by myself,
unsupervised.

‐ Get your purse. ‐ Ah, ha ha!

I can't believe you guys
are passing up lunch

at The Four Seasons!

‐ Well, I'm still coming.
‐ Yeah, alright.

Since it's just
gonna be you and me

I guess I'll take you to the
falafel stand at the corner.

Great. I'll take the
Falafel Grande.

See, that's Rusty Biggins.
I looked him up.

He's a seasoned welterweight but
he's never really made it big.

Wow. Look at that little
guy knock him down.

Yeah, maybe he's havin' a bad day.
I don't know.

And he's fallin' the
same way every time.

Synclaire, what does
that look like to you?

Me after a vodka stinger?

I got an even better theory.

[buzzer buzzing]

‐ I'm gonna talk to him. ‐
I'm not gonna just sit here.

I'm gonna hit the speed bag.
Don't wanna look conspicuous.

Hey, guys. Lemme
borrow those gloves.

‐ Hey, Rusty. You remember me?
‐ Oh, yeah. The reporter.

Well, gotta go.

Look, uh... I know what
you doin' in that ring.

How much does King Davis
pay you to take a fall?

Heh. Pay me? Lady, I
live with my mother.

That answer your question?

Fine. I have everything
I need for my story.

I was just trying to give you

an opportunity to
tell your side.

Yeah, that's what all
you reporters say.

Look, uh... does your mother
know you gonna take a dive?

Damn. Had to bring
my momma into it!

Yo, okay. But I can't
talk about it here.

Just tell me when and where.

I'm fighting at the
Goldmine Hotel

at Atlantic City this week.
Meet me there tomorrow.

Alright.

Alright, Synclaire. Let's go.

Hear that? Hear the rhythm.

‐ Gotta have the rhythm.
‐ Si, Synclaire.

Regine, imagine my surprise
when a limousine rolled up

and you got out.

Well... from now on, I
am spoiling myself.

I've bought all the
cosmetics I ever wanted.

Well, all they had anyway.

And to think I suggested
you buy a mutual fund.

[chuckling]

You will change your tune when
you see what I got for you.

Oh, ho ho..

A little Fashion Fair umbrella.

How lovely.

An Elizabeth Arden travel tote.

You shouldn't have.

Hey, do you know how much
anti‐aging cream I had to buy

to get that free tote?

Oh‐h, watch out now! Lip balm.

And a cuticle nipper.
Well, alright!

‐ Hello, people. ‐ Ah.
My attorney!

Pour Vous.

Hmm. Anti‐aging cream.

Well, you might wanna
hold on to that.

You're about to age ten years.

I just heard from Wishco,
and it turns out

there won't be any royalties.

Wha'?

The Cherine doll
is being recalled.

Huh, what happened?

Did the Ken doll get a
little jungle fever?

[laughing]

Apparently, Cherine's wigs
are highly flammable.

A little girl in Buffalo left
her out in the sun too long

and Cherine spontaneously
combusted.

So, uh... just slap a
warning on the box

and get them dolls
on the shelves.

Well, that's not all.

You've also been named
in a class action suit.

But don't worry, I'll
still represent you

at a discount rate.

And, uh... of course I'll
continue to eat here, so..

Ah, Regine, I'm kinda
disappointed in you.

Didn't you safety‐test
your little face before

you put it on the market?

I cannot believe this
is happening to me!

Man! Just when my ship
was about to come in.

‐ Life really stinks!
‐ It'll be okay.

You'll get your money back once
you return all that stuff.

Oh, no. See, it's
not that simple.

Now, I've gotta go and retrieve
those letters that I mailed

to family members,
cutting them off.

Lemme see if I have
this straight.

King Davis takes a boxer. Pays
his opponents to take a dive.

Exactly. When the fighter's
ready for his big payday

Davis turns around, pays his
own fighter to take a dive

places bets against
him, cleans up.

It's a hell of a scam.

There's a six dollar bag of
peanuts in there you missed.

Oh, no no. Not for me.
I'm in training.

You know, this means the
end of my boxing career.

‐ Sorry. ‐ Ah, don't be.

Feels good to finally get
this stuff off my chest.

Besides, it's time I finally
move on with my life.

Maybe, I'll go work
for my brother.

He owns a Flowbee dealership.

Well, thanks a lot.

Yes! Yes!

‐ Whoa! ‐ Good interview.

Did you know there's
a bidet in there?

How the hell did
you get in here?

I told the, uh, maid
I was your husband

and that I lost my key.

So she congratulated us on
our honeymoon and gave me

a whole bunch of extra
bottles of shampoo.

You know where you can stick
those tiny little bottles?

Baby, baby, let's not fight.

It's the first day of
our new life together.

So, this is how the
great Marcus Hughes

gets his stories?

Somebody else does the work
while you sit in there

on the toilet and take notes.

Well, not every day, but if
it makes you feel any better

I think you're a
hell of a reporter.

Because I tried to talk to Rusty
but I couldn't break him.

Well... there are good reporters
and then there's you.

Ooh... I wouldn't go
there because, see

we both have the
same information.

And since our publications hit
the stand on the same day

a few million readers
are gonna read my story

and a few dozen are
gonna read yours.

But mine won't be running
under an ugly picture of you.

How 'bout we call
this thing a draw?

Okay? We're in Atlantic City.

Why don't we go downstairs,
hit the 299 crab buffet

and catch the Pips impersonator.

It's like a dream.
How can I say no?

You can't. Let's go. C'mon.

Alright. Grab us a couple plates
and I'll meet you down there.

I love it when you
tell me what to do.

Well, then shut
up and get goin'.

I'm goin', I'm goin', I'm goin'.

Nine..

Synclaire, look, it's me. Listen.
No, listen. Okay.

Now, Flavor is about to come
out a day early. Yes, we can.

I've just plugged in a quote
from the boxing story

and I'm sendin' 'em to
the office computer now.

Just make sure it gets to the
printer and don't screw up.

Hey, you know what.
I was thinking..

Uh, wha‐what are you doin'?

I'm sending my story to Flavor.

It'll be on the stands
in the morning.

Zippoo!

But Flavor doesn't come
out till Thursday.

Heh. Flavor comes out
when I say it comes out.

You see, I own it.

I can't believe that you
actually scooped me?

Tch. Another fact I can't hide

from the brilliant
Marcus Hughes.

So, you think I'm brilliant.
Do you?

No. You think you're brilliant.
I think I'm hungry.

Now, let's go.

Tell me what story
you working on next?

See, that's none of
your damn business.

‐ C'mon, you can tell me. ‐
Why are you in my stories?

(Regine) 'I don't care
what anybody says.'

'You're still the
classiest doll around.'

(Khadijah) 'Regine, stop playing
with that stupid doll.'

'The Repo Man is here for
your big screen TV.'