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1
00:01:03,667 --> 00:01:05,532
问问看是不是马面仔
2
00:01:07,500 --> 00:01:09,115
还是没有筊
3
00:01:12,458 --> 00:01:13,948
还是没有筊
4
00:01:19,500 --> 00:01:20,034
圣筊
5
00:01:20,167 --> 00:01:20,701
冰的啦
6
00:01:20,833 --> 00:01:22,744
翻桌啦 看恁娘咧
7
00:01:32,375 --> 00:01:33,956
一天到晚拿这支来给我吸
8
00:01:34,083 --> 00:01:35,698
奇怪耶
9
00:01:54,875 --> 00:01:56,661
又怎么了
10
00:01:57,417 --> 00:01:59,157
北港那个牙槽芳又来了
11
00:02:03,417 --> 00:02:05,282
老爸隐退江湖之后
12
00:02:05,417 --> 00:02:08,705
没开照相馆 反而开了间民宿
13
00:02:08,833 --> 00:02:12,997
江湖上兄弟口耳相传 你家就是我家
14
00:02:13,125 --> 00:02:15,116
凡是跑路的 落难的
15
00:02:15,250 --> 00:02:18,617
只要报得出名号 统统免费
16
00:02:24,417 --> 00:02:25,281
大哥
17
00:02:25,708 --> 00:02:26,697
大哥
18
00:02:38,708 --> 00:02:40,118
北港牙槽芳
19
00:02:40,250 --> 00:02:42,081
你这礼拜来五次了耶
20
00:02:42,208 --> 00:02:43,914
不好意思啦 大哥
21
00:02:44,042 --> 00:02:45,202
现在又在跑路啦
22
00:02:45,958 --> 00:02:47,744
跑路还带马子
23
00:02:48,417 --> 00:02:49,452
大哥
24
00:02:49,583 --> 00:02:51,539
这南北二路的兄弟大家都知道
25
00:02:51,667 --> 00:02:53,703
知道 你家就是我家
26
00:02:53,958 --> 00:02:56,415
那你怎么不带你马子去住全家
27
00:02:57,375 --> 00:02:58,080
我就
28
00:02:58,208 --> 00:02:59,664
好啦…
29
00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,831
烟还这样抽
30
00:03:03,208 --> 00:03:04,493
规矩看
31
00:03:04,625 --> 00:03:05,705
看
32
00:03:07,458 --> 00:03:09,244
婚 逃 卖 暖 蛋
33
00:03:09,375 --> 00:03:10,740
你个混蛋啦
34
00:03:10,875 --> 00:03:12,661
烟头别乱丢啦
35
00:03:18,542 --> 00:03:20,328
火柴两支
36
00:03:20,792 --> 00:03:22,202
汽油一桶
37
00:03:23,208 --> 00:03:24,698
刘文聪
38
00:03:26,958 --> 00:03:27,993
大哥
39
00:03:28,125 --> 00:03:30,286
霹雳火刘文聪 正在跑路
40
00:03:30,417 --> 00:03:31,281
来你这里借住一下
41
00:03:31,417 --> 00:03:32,372
没问题
42
00:03:32,500 --> 00:03:34,206
但是规矩你知道吧
43
00:03:34,542 --> 00:03:36,123
婚逃卖暖蛋
44
00:03:36,500 --> 00:03:37,740
内行的
45
00:03:44,583 --> 00:03:45,698
艋舺豆浆
46
00:03:46,292 --> 00:03:47,748
艋岬豆浆
47
00:03:48,083 --> 00:03:50,290
大稻埕疯狗
48
00:03:50,792 --> 00:03:51,622
有戏看了
49
00:04:08,333 --> 00:04:10,665
疯狗你看个屁
50
00:04:11,667 --> 00:04:14,079
有狂犬病要去注疫苗啦
51
00:04:14,208 --> 00:04:15,744
注你妈啦
52
00:04:16,333 --> 00:04:17,448
怎样…
53
00:04:17,583 --> 00:04:19,414
你现在还挤得出豆浆吗
54
00:04:19,542 --> 00:04:21,328
这去问你老婆就知道了啦
55
00:04:21,458 --> 00:04:22,243
说什么
56
00:04:22,375 --> 00:04:22,864
你要怎样
57
00:04:22,958 --> 00:04:23,617
让他死啦
58
00:04:23,750 --> 00:04:24,239
你要怎样
59
00:04:24,333 --> 00:04:26,369
有种你再对老子说一次啊
60
00:04:27,875 --> 00:04:29,411
好痛啊…
61
00:04:35,042 --> 00:04:36,748
很痛啦
62
00:04:37,625 --> 00:04:38,580
笑
63
00:04:39,500 --> 00:04:40,615
笑啊
64
00:04:41,375 --> 00:04:42,490
要笑
65
00:04:42,625 --> 00:04:43,489
笑就对
66
00:04:44,375 --> 00:04:46,582
懂得笑就没有仇恨
67
00:04:47,625 --> 00:04:49,331
你们再继续不笑
68
00:04:49,458 --> 00:04:51,915
你的蛋会破掉
69
00:05:05,333 --> 00:05:06,322
来 这里有
70
00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:08,739
新来的喔
71
00:05:10,125 --> 00:05:11,956
不错 反应快喔
72
00:05:12,083 --> 00:05:12,868
以我的经验
73
00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:14,581
一些粗心大意的客人不小心
74
00:05:14,708 --> 00:05:15,788
筷子都会掉到地上
75
00:05:15,917 --> 00:05:17,373
我们只要随身携带一双筷子
76
00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:20,037
客人需要的时候 我们就可以给他
77
00:05:20,167 --> 00:05:21,202
聪明…
78
00:05:26,292 --> 00:05:27,828
你怎么绑一条绳子
79
00:05:28,500 --> 00:05:29,831
这是我师父教我的啦
80
00:05:29,958 --> 00:05:32,449
只要在小鸟鸟的头顶上绑一条绳子
81
00:05:32,583 --> 00:05:34,665
想尿尿的时候 绳子一拉
82
00:05:34,792 --> 00:05:36,032
小鸟鸟就会滑出来
83
00:05:36,167 --> 00:05:37,907
这样我们就不用碰到小鸟鸟
84
00:05:38,042 --> 00:05:40,328
而且还可以保持双手干净
85
00:05:41,375 --> 00:05:42,535
卫生
86
00:05:43,833 --> 00:05:44,993
咦 不对喔
87
00:05:45,125 --> 00:05:46,581
那尿完呢
88
00:05:47,292 --> 00:05:48,452
要怎样塞进去
89
00:05:49,083 --> 00:05:50,448
别人我是不知道
90
00:05:50,583 --> 00:05:53,040
我的话是直接用筷子把它夹回去
91
00:05:58,208 --> 00:06:00,540
就是这样才会有鸟仔味喔
92
00:07:07,958 --> 00:07:10,574
（浇花）
93
00:07:19,542 --> 00:07:21,032
（便当）
94
00:07:27,167 --> 00:07:28,703
（煮咖啡）
95
00:08:02,792 --> 00:08:05,249
（清粪池）
96
00:08:05,375 --> 00:08:07,457
（洗水塔）
97
00:08:07,583 --> 00:08:09,244
（灭老鼠）
98
00:08:09,375 --> 00:08:11,616
（修壁癌）
99
00:08:15,083 --> 00:08:16,869
甜蜜的家庭
100
00:08:17,458 --> 00:08:20,996
我们家有爸爸 妈妈 外公跟我四个人
101
00:08:21,667 --> 00:08:24,124
每天早上妈妈送我上学
102
00:08:24,250 --> 00:08:26,081
爸爸睡懒觉
103
00:08:26,208 --> 00:08:28,415
阿公在外面鬼混
104
00:08:28,542 --> 00:08:31,614
大家分道扬镳 各奔前程
105
00:08:32,875 --> 00:08:36,823
一直到日落西山 才又迷途知返
106
00:08:36,958 --> 00:08:38,448
驾鹤西归
107
00:08:40,667 --> 00:08:41,531
蚝油
108
00:08:41,667 --> 00:08:42,907
虾仁
109
00:08:43,042 --> 00:08:43,906
蛋
110
00:08:44,042 --> 00:08:45,782
爸爸是大厨
111
00:08:45,917 --> 00:08:49,284
每天搔首弄姿地 搞七捻三
112
00:08:49,667 --> 00:08:50,747
它叫做
113
00:08:50,875 --> 00:08:52,740
濠洨虾扯蛋
114
00:08:54,625 --> 00:08:56,081
妈妈做店长
115
00:08:56,208 --> 00:09:00,030
每天在店里招摇撞骗 来者不拒
116
00:09:03,375 --> 00:09:04,285
宝贝
117
00:09:04,833 --> 00:09:07,575
帮妈妈问一下 爸爸什么时候回来
118
00:09:07,833 --> 00:09:09,994
爸爸 妈问你什么时候回来
119
00:09:10,125 --> 00:09:11,706
好啦 叫你妈听电话
120
00:09:12,333 --> 00:09:14,164
妈妈 爸爸叫妳听电话
121
00:09:14,292 --> 00:09:17,534
妈妈没空 你替妈妈说
122
00:09:18,458 --> 00:09:20,073
都九点了你还不回来
123
00:09:20,208 --> 00:09:22,039
你这死鬼如果你再不回来
124
00:09:22,167 --> 00:09:25,580
今天晚上就不要上老娘的床了
125
00:09:31,833 --> 00:09:34,165
阿公老而不休 每天做义交
126
00:09:41,375 --> 00:09:45,038
色欲熏心地做些 禽兽不如的指挥
127
00:09:45,167 --> 00:09:47,624
请问一下 旧宗路怎么走
128
00:09:50,375 --> 00:09:51,535
谢谢
129
00:10:03,042 --> 00:10:08,287
平常我们一家五口 臭气相投 一团和气
130
00:10:09,083 --> 00:10:11,574
只有在发成绩单的时候…
131
00:10:12,583 --> 00:10:13,413
36
132
00:10:13,792 --> 00:10:14,622
32
133
00:10:15,042 --> 00:10:15,781
27
134
00:10:16,125 --> 00:10:16,910
24
135
00:10:18,583 --> 00:10:21,541
他考试怎么都考香港彩号
136
00:10:21,667 --> 00:10:24,158
都没考半个台湾号码的
137
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:27,824
妈妈就会 大义灭亲
138
00:10:28,292 --> 00:10:31,034
爸爸更是 心狠手辣
139
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,707
揍得我 身心俱疲
140
00:10:38,500 --> 00:10:43,119
阿公只会在一旁 视若无睹 袖手旁观
141
00:10:44,958 --> 00:10:47,950
这就是我甜蜜的家庭
142
00:10:51,292 --> 00:10:54,329
你看这个孩子这么有骨气 这种气魄
143
00:10:54,708 --> 00:10:56,824
功劳要归他阿公教的
144
00:10:57,458 --> 00:10:58,117
对吧
145
00:10:58,250 --> 00:10:59,706
妳看 赞
146
00:11:20,333 --> 00:11:22,198
今天是哪国跟哪国啊
147
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,490
巴西踢西班牙
148
00:11:29,125 --> 00:11:30,535
NBA喔
149
00:11:31,167 --> 00:11:33,158
世界杯啦
150
00:11:37,583 --> 00:11:40,040
那我们中华队什么时候踢啊
151
00:11:40,167 --> 00:11:42,408
没有中华队啦 我们那么弱
152
00:11:44,333 --> 00:11:46,790
我们今天晚上也来射门好不好
153
00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:49,823
不行啦
154
00:11:50,167 --> 00:11:52,158
射自己门算输
155
00:11:52,292 --> 00:11:54,499
射别人的门才算赢
156
00:11:58,625 --> 00:12:00,456
那我们结婚好不好
157
00:12:04,125 --> 00:12:05,114
跟谁啊
158
00:12:08,375 --> 00:12:08,955
妳干嘛
159
00:12:09,083 --> 00:12:09,947
算了
160
00:12:35,375 --> 00:12:37,081
九娘妈尊驾在上
161
00:12:37,208 --> 00:12:39,039
今年风不调 雨不顺
162
00:12:39,167 --> 00:12:41,249
一直到现在连一滴雨都没有
163
00:12:41,375 --> 00:12:43,115
收成的时间就要到了
164
00:12:43,250 --> 00:12:45,411
不知道今年会下雨吗
165
00:12:45,542 --> 00:12:47,032
会
166
00:12:48,042 --> 00:12:49,452
什么时候啊
167
00:12:49,583 --> 00:12:51,539
这个妳不用烦恼
168
00:12:51,667 --> 00:12:53,578
九娘妈诞辰的时候
169
00:12:53,875 --> 00:12:55,740
就会天降甘霖
170
00:12:56,417 --> 00:12:57,782
只不过…
171
00:12:58,750 --> 00:12:59,785
只不过什么
172
00:12:59,917 --> 00:13:01,077
我需要一个人
173
00:13:02,250 --> 00:13:03,239
什么人
174
00:13:03,583 --> 00:13:04,823
就是妳妹妹
175
00:13:06,958 --> 00:13:08,494
我没有妹妹
176
00:13:08,625 --> 00:13:10,741
妳不要在那边给我装疯卖傻
177
00:13:11,333 --> 00:13:13,745
就是妳妹妹 记得喔
178
00:13:14,250 --> 00:13:16,115
九娘诞辰的时候
179
00:13:16,250 --> 00:13:18,411
跟妳妹妹一起来帮扛神轿
180
00:13:18,542 --> 00:13:20,498
这样天才会下大雨
181
00:13:20,625 --> 00:13:22,786
乡民会大收成
182
00:13:28,167 --> 00:13:28,997
妹妹
183
00:13:29,125 --> 00:13:31,036
妳猜我今年几岁啊
184
00:13:31,167 --> 00:13:32,703
应该不到30吧
185
00:13:33,708 --> 00:13:34,413
不止啦
186
00:13:34,542 --> 00:13:37,284
我今年35岁又过8天
187
00:13:38,333 --> 00:13:40,073
老板我要一只鱿鱼
188
00:13:40,208 --> 00:13:41,618
小姐好辣喔
189
00:13:41,750 --> 00:13:43,786
老板 你觉得我看起来几岁
190
00:13:44,375 --> 00:13:45,956
哎呦
191
00:13:46,083 --> 00:13:46,947
28
192
00:13:47,292 --> 00:13:48,247
谢谢
193
00:13:48,375 --> 00:13:49,114
再见
194
00:13:49,250 --> 00:13:50,410
谢谢
195
00:14:03,958 --> 00:14:04,788
阿伯
196
00:14:05,958 --> 00:14:07,914
什么叫阿伯 没礼貌
197
00:14:08,042 --> 00:14:09,907
至少也要叫年轻人
198
00:14:12,417 --> 00:14:12,951
年轻人
199
00:14:13,083 --> 00:14:13,947
什么事
200
00:14:14,083 --> 00:14:15,539
你看 我几岁
201
00:14:15,667 --> 00:14:17,203
妳几岁喔
202
00:14:17,667 --> 00:14:19,532
几岁用看的不准啦
203
00:14:19,667 --> 00:14:21,532
要用摸的才会准
204
00:14:22,208 --> 00:14:22,993
好吧
205
00:14:23,625 --> 00:14:25,490
摸手不准啦
206
00:14:25,917 --> 00:14:27,248
要不然要摸哪里才会准啦
207
00:14:27,375 --> 00:14:28,990
要摸这里才会准啦
208
00:14:30,417 --> 00:14:31,702
你这个人怎么这样啊
209
00:14:31,833 --> 00:14:34,040
你不要当我是猪哥耶
210
00:14:34,625 --> 00:14:35,330
如果妳要准
211
00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:36,413
好来
212
00:14:36,917 --> 00:14:37,451
来
213
00:14:37,583 --> 00:14:38,698
我这里有钱
214
00:14:38,833 --> 00:14:39,868
妳拿着
215
00:14:40,875 --> 00:14:42,331
摸不准
216
00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:44,410
钱妳的
217
00:14:45,542 --> 00:14:47,407
如果你猜错 这些钱都是我的
218
00:14:47,542 --> 00:14:48,577
对啊
219
00:14:56,750 --> 00:14:58,081
不然好啦 来
220
00:15:03,292 --> 00:15:04,281
几岁
221
00:15:05,083 --> 00:15:06,914
摸一边不准
222
00:15:07,750 --> 00:15:09,832
要摸两边才准
223
00:15:14,458 --> 00:15:16,494
好了没啦 几岁啦
224
00:15:19,417 --> 00:15:22,989
35岁差不多过8天
225
00:15:23,875 --> 00:15:24,830
你怎么那么厉害
226
00:15:24,958 --> 00:15:25,538
准吧
227
00:15:25,667 --> 00:15:26,156
嗯
228
00:15:26,250 --> 00:15:27,956
好来 钱还我
229
00:15:28,917 --> 00:15:30,498
你怎么知道的
230
00:15:33,667 --> 00:15:35,123
我不好意思讲啦
231
00:15:35,792 --> 00:15:37,748
讲了我怕妳翻脸啦
232
00:15:38,625 --> 00:15:40,115
我不会翻脸 你说
233
00:15:40,250 --> 00:15:41,581
不会翻脸喔
234
00:15:42,500 --> 00:15:44,286
妳刚刚在买冰淇淋
235
00:15:44,417 --> 00:15:45,873
我听到的啦
236
00:15:47,042 --> 00:15:49,033
那时候我在那里排队啊
237
00:15:51,042 --> 00:15:53,374
老色魔 你这个老色魔
238
00:16:08,292 --> 00:16:10,578
安全帽没有人这样戴的啦
239
00:16:11,542 --> 00:16:12,782
你懂什么
240
00:16:13,375 --> 00:16:15,366
方便 不晒太阳
241
00:16:16,333 --> 00:16:18,540
警察又不会开单
242
00:16:19,458 --> 00:16:22,325
要让你懂 老子胡须打结
243
00:16:30,042 --> 00:16:31,031
孙啊
244
00:16:31,625 --> 00:16:33,161
你在那里坐喔
245
00:16:34,208 --> 00:16:37,496
那是你妈妈送我的砧板
246
00:16:37,625 --> 00:16:39,331
你在玩什么啊
247
00:16:40,583 --> 00:16:41,447
不错喔
248
00:16:41,583 --> 00:16:42,447
可惜
249
00:16:42,583 --> 00:16:43,789
太小了
250
00:16:43,917 --> 00:16:45,202
这是电脑啦
251
00:16:45,958 --> 00:16:47,744
现在科技这么发达喔
252
00:16:48,083 --> 00:16:49,914
砧板也可以当电脑喔
253
00:16:50,292 --> 00:16:52,283
跟你讲你也听不懂
254
00:16:52,833 --> 00:16:54,949
你今天没有去上课喔
255
00:16:55,542 --> 00:16:57,373
我有打电话请假呀
256
00:16:57,708 --> 00:17:00,825
你专程请假来打电脑喔
257
00:17:00,958 --> 00:17:02,198
啊不然咧
258
00:17:03,833 --> 00:17:05,494
你这样回话
259
00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:08,241
如果别人看到 会说你这小鬼跟我一样
260
00:17:14,292 --> 00:17:15,953
孙啊 快躲起来
261
00:17:16,083 --> 00:17:17,163
你老师来了
262
00:17:18,042 --> 00:17:18,781
快点
263
00:17:18,917 --> 00:17:20,202
躲起来…
264
00:17:20,333 --> 00:17:21,038
你老师来了
265
00:17:21,167 --> 00:17:22,452
你才躲起来咧
266
00:17:22,583 --> 00:17:23,618
什么我要躲起来
267
00:17:23,750 --> 00:17:24,910
我为什么要躲起来
268
00:17:25,042 --> 00:17:27,033
我请假说我阿公死掉啦
269
00:17:30,792 --> 00:17:32,453
现在要换我躲起来…
270
00:17:32,583 --> 00:17:33,322
怎么会有这种孙子
271
00:17:33,458 --> 00:17:36,165
请假骗别人阿公死掉
272
00:17:36,292 --> 00:17:38,283
惨了 我要躲在哪里
273
00:17:40,625 --> 00:17:41,831
你 你是
274
00:17:43,917 --> 00:17:45,578
我孙子跟你说我死了 对吧
275
00:17:45,708 --> 00:17:46,197
是
276
00:17:46,292 --> 00:17:48,203
对啦 我死了
277
00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:51,245
我今天回来做头七
278
00:17:51,625 --> 00:17:52,114
老师
279
00:17:55,083 --> 00:17:56,072
你不要吓别人啦
280
00:17:56,208 --> 00:17:57,573
现在我被妳吓到
281
00:17:58,083 --> 00:17:58,868
我跟你说啊
282
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,366
老师最afraid的就是ghost
283
00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:05,448
你们知道吗 people吓 people 会吓 dead people
284
00:18:05,583 --> 00:18:07,414
什么东东叫做people
285
00:18:07,542 --> 00:18:08,531
人吓人
286
00:18:08,667 --> 00:18:10,157
吓死人
287
00:18:10,292 --> 00:18:10,872
老师
288
00:18:14,917 --> 00:18:16,782
我告诉你喔 来你们家喔
289
00:18:16,917 --> 00:18:19,624
被你们这一家人要吓死了
290
00:18:19,750 --> 00:18:21,741
我们才被你吓死啦
291
00:18:21,875 --> 00:18:22,364
怎么来了啊
292
00:18:22,500 --> 00:18:24,832
怎么来了 你问你儿子啊
293
00:18:24,958 --> 00:18:25,538
他干嘛
294
00:18:25,667 --> 00:18:26,201
干嘛
295
00:18:26,333 --> 00:18:28,574
我告诉你 你儿子打人
296
00:18:28,708 --> 00:18:30,664
把人家打掉三颗牙
297
00:18:30,792 --> 00:18:34,080
人家现在一颗牙要你们赔二十万
298
00:18:34,625 --> 00:18:36,115
一颗牙齿要赔二十万
299
00:18:36,250 --> 00:18:36,739
是啊
300
00:18:36,875 --> 00:18:39,036
他是要换象牙吗
301
00:18:39,542 --> 00:18:40,577
象牙如果换下去
302
00:18:40,708 --> 00:18:43,245
是没有办法嗑瓜子耶
303
00:18:48,708 --> 00:18:50,448
老师对不起
304
00:18:51,917 --> 00:18:52,906
宝贝
305
00:18:53,042 --> 00:18:54,578
跟妈妈说为什么打人呢
306
00:18:54,708 --> 00:18:56,699
谁叫他骂我野种
307
00:18:58,292 --> 00:19:02,205
学校做壁报 要交爸爸妈妈的结婚照
308
00:19:02,333 --> 00:19:03,869
只有我没有
309
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,161
没有结婚照就没有结婚
310
00:19:06,292 --> 00:19:08,203
你是外面捡来的野种
311
00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:09,489
欸 老师
312
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:10,785
谁骂我儿子野种
313
00:19:10,917 --> 00:19:11,531
不是我
314
00:19:11,667 --> 00:19:12,531
那谁啊
315
00:19:12,667 --> 00:19:13,156
不是我
316
00:19:13,250 --> 00:19:14,990
那不然是哪一个孩子
317
00:19:15,125 --> 00:19:15,955
老子来学校
318
00:19:16,083 --> 00:19:17,493
你给我说是哪一个
319
00:19:17,625 --> 00:19:19,331
老子把他的嘴巴缝起来
320
00:19:19,458 --> 00:19:20,038
我去他妈的
321
00:19:20,167 --> 00:19:21,247
这么有种 看
322
00:19:21,375 --> 00:19:22,205
爸
323
00:19:23,042 --> 00:19:25,533
丑弟就是跟你学的
324
00:19:25,875 --> 00:19:28,617
你可不可以给他一个好榜样
325
00:19:46,667 --> 00:19:48,123
爸你还没睡喔
326
00:19:48,542 --> 00:19:50,157
我怎么睡得着
327
00:19:50,958 --> 00:19:54,951
我是想来跟妳说一句对不起
328
00:19:55,708 --> 00:19:59,951
我也不是故意要把妳儿子教坏
329
00:20:00,458 --> 00:20:04,997
我想说妳从出生我就没照顾妳
330
00:20:05,583 --> 00:20:08,370
现在妳生一个儿子 我的孙子
331
00:20:08,833 --> 00:20:12,530
我想要弥补妳 我才会教他
332
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,082
下次我不会了
333
00:20:16,208 --> 00:20:18,494
我一定会好好做一个阿公
334
00:20:18,625 --> 00:20:21,162
不会在他的面前胡乱来
335
00:20:27,083 --> 00:20:28,072
爸
336
00:20:28,583 --> 00:20:31,040
爸 我们是一家人
337
00:20:32,333 --> 00:20:34,619
一家人不说对不起啦
338
00:20:35,542 --> 00:20:37,373
我知道你爱丑弟
339
00:20:37,792 --> 00:20:38,952
我知道
340
00:20:40,750 --> 00:20:42,115
你也爱我
341
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:48,285
别哭啦
342
00:20:50,792 --> 00:20:53,283
妳很会把我弄哭
343
00:20:55,917 --> 00:20:58,875
有你在 我就觉得很幸福
344
00:21:00,375 --> 00:21:01,205
好
345
00:21:01,333 --> 00:21:03,369
我在妳面前发誓
346
00:21:03,917 --> 00:21:06,033
我在妳儿子面前 下次如果我再说脏话
347
00:21:06,167 --> 00:21:07,122
我婊子生的
348
00:21:07,250 --> 00:21:08,285
看
349
00:21:10,708 --> 00:21:13,120
忘记了
350
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,911
妳现在是在卖内裤喔
351
00:21:36,583 --> 00:21:37,413
大哥
352
00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:40,491
我那个死鬼
353
00:21:40,625 --> 00:21:42,866
他昨晚没有给我回家
354
00:21:43,500 --> 00:21:45,115
今天早上
355
00:21:45,625 --> 00:21:47,661
喝到醉醺醺
356
00:21:47,792 --> 00:21:51,114
才穿这条三角裤给我回来啦
357
00:21:51,250 --> 00:21:53,161
你要替我作主
358
00:21:53,292 --> 00:21:55,157
你老公还真够笨的
359
00:21:55,292 --> 00:21:56,623
在外面偷吃
360
00:21:56,750 --> 00:21:58,832
也不会擦嘴
361
00:21:58,958 --> 00:21:59,913
没关系…
362
00:22:00,042 --> 00:22:01,248
我会替妳解决
363
00:22:12,500 --> 00:22:13,080
大哥
364
00:22:14,083 --> 00:22:16,290
如果还有下一次
365
00:22:17,333 --> 00:22:19,369
如果还有下一次
366
00:22:19,625 --> 00:22:24,073
就别怪老娘心狠手辣
367
00:22:24,208 --> 00:22:26,073
看你老师
368
00:22:29,458 --> 00:22:31,949
你猪哥性又发起来了喔
369
00:22:32,083 --> 00:22:32,868
你对人家怎么了
370
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:34,410
没有啦…
371
00:22:34,708 --> 00:22:35,572
那是…
372
00:22:35,708 --> 00:22:36,322
没有
373
00:22:36,458 --> 00:22:37,743
你每次在那边没有…
374
00:22:37,875 --> 00:22:39,285
你就是做亏心事啦
375
00:22:39,417 --> 00:22:41,248
就跟妳说没有了啊
376
00:22:42,458 --> 00:22:43,413
这什么
377
00:22:43,542 --> 00:22:45,123
那个就是…
378
00:22:48,958 --> 00:22:50,619
哭夭…
379
00:22:50,750 --> 00:22:52,536
你拿我内裤干嘛
380
00:22:52,667 --> 00:22:53,531
这内裤妳的
381
00:22:53,667 --> 00:22:54,406
你说废话
382
00:22:54,542 --> 00:22:55,372
你看几遍了
383
00:22:55,500 --> 00:22:56,114
那她老公…
384
00:22:56,250 --> 00:22:57,581
内裤是我的
385
00:23:01,500 --> 00:23:02,114
姊
386
00:23:02,250 --> 00:23:04,332
我们好久不见了喔
387
00:23:04,875 --> 00:23:06,035
想不到这么多年了
388
00:23:06,167 --> 00:23:08,783
我们姊妹还是穿同一个牌子的内裤
389
00:23:09,250 --> 00:23:10,615
就没办法啊
390
00:23:10,750 --> 00:23:12,160
昨晚钱输光了
391
00:23:12,292 --> 00:23:13,247
没地方睡
392
00:23:13,375 --> 00:23:14,535
临时做点生意
393
00:23:14,667 --> 00:23:15,326
看
394
00:23:15,458 --> 00:23:16,447
怎么知道倒霉到翻过去
395
00:23:16,583 --> 00:23:17,743
碰到个喝酒醉的
396
00:23:17,875 --> 00:23:19,991
连内裤都穿错
397
00:23:20,875 --> 00:23:23,537
妳什么时候有个妹妹
398
00:23:25,292 --> 00:23:27,203
你应该就是我姊夫啊
399
00:23:27,333 --> 00:23:29,540
要再猜猜看我几岁吗
400
00:23:31,542 --> 00:23:33,157
应该不用问啦 妳…
401
00:23:33,292 --> 00:23:35,283
比妳姊姊更年轻啦
402
00:23:35,417 --> 00:23:36,998
这还用说
403
00:23:38,500 --> 00:23:40,365
妳怎么有办法找到这里
404
00:23:40,958 --> 00:23:41,913
妳不知道喔
405
00:23:42,042 --> 00:23:43,748
人如果在欠钱跑路的时候
406
00:23:43,875 --> 00:23:46,207
会有一种特异功能
407
00:23:47,042 --> 00:23:47,747
这样闻一下
408
00:23:47,875 --> 00:23:49,991
就知道亲戚朋友在哪里
409
00:23:50,750 --> 00:23:52,536
你说对吧 姊夫
410
00:23:52,667 --> 00:23:54,282
对 这个我内行
411
00:23:54,750 --> 00:23:55,580
要不要再摸摸看啊
412
00:23:55,708 --> 00:23:56,868
别…
413
00:24:15,958 --> 00:24:16,993
大哥
414
00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:19,206
我们这么久没回家
415
00:24:19,333 --> 00:24:21,289
要先给嫂子打个电话吗
416
00:24:21,417 --> 00:24:23,373
万一嫂子在偷汉子呢
417
00:24:23,500 --> 00:24:25,206
不会啦 偷汉子
418
00:24:25,333 --> 00:24:27,324
我是要给她一个惊喜啦
419
00:24:27,458 --> 00:24:28,573
这样啊
420
00:24:28,708 --> 00:24:29,618
快点
421
00:24:52,083 --> 00:24:53,744
隔壁老王
422
00:24:53,875 --> 00:24:54,864
老王
423
00:24:56,375 --> 00:24:57,990
你去找看看有没有手机
424
00:24:58,125 --> 00:24:59,410
手机
425
00:24:59,708 --> 00:25:02,620
妳老公搞我老婆
426
00:25:02,750 --> 00:25:03,785
妈的
427
00:25:03,917 --> 00:25:05,327
狗男女
428
00:25:06,583 --> 00:25:08,414
死老王
429
00:25:08,958 --> 00:25:11,119
我绝对要你后悔
430
00:25:11,542 --> 00:25:13,203
什么后悔
431
00:25:23,083 --> 00:25:24,914
好久没搞了
432
00:25:25,042 --> 00:25:26,623
死老猴…
433
00:25:26,750 --> 00:25:27,830
你敢给我偷吃
434
00:25:27,958 --> 00:25:29,414
你给我偷吃
435
00:25:33,583 --> 00:25:35,369
死了啦
436
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:46,661
死老王
437
00:25:47,625 --> 00:25:49,832
我越想越气
438
00:25:51,917 --> 00:25:53,703
我还要报复一次
439
00:25:54,917 --> 00:25:57,158
你给我找女人
440
00:25:57,292 --> 00:25:58,828
你再去啊…
441
00:25:58,958 --> 00:25:59,868
死老猴
442
00:26:20,417 --> 00:26:22,408
哪有这么简单就放过他
443
00:26:25,292 --> 00:26:27,624
死老猴
444
00:26:27,750 --> 00:26:29,115
我恨你啊
445
00:26:29,250 --> 00:26:30,660
死老猴
446
00:26:43,167 --> 00:26:44,907
恁老师咧
447
00:26:46,292 --> 00:26:48,624
我越想越火大
448
00:26:51,083 --> 00:26:53,119
我已经没那么恨他们了
449
00:26:53,625 --> 00:26:55,911
可是我还恨
450
00:26:59,792 --> 00:27:03,239
以前这个场子是我老爸奇大的
451
00:27:03,375 --> 00:27:06,913
现在大尾退出江湖
452
00:27:07,042 --> 00:27:08,782
我又出狱了
453
00:27:08,917 --> 00:27:10,157
是越狱
454
00:27:15,833 --> 00:27:17,824
那地盘就应该要还我
455
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:21,160
小奇大
456
00:27:21,833 --> 00:27:23,494
你话这样说就不对了
457
00:27:23,792 --> 00:27:26,158
虽然大尾已经退出江湖了
458
00:27:26,583 --> 00:27:29,996
但他才是你爸奇大的唯一传人
459
00:27:30,583 --> 00:27:33,905
这一点在大家心目中 是永远都不会改变的
460
00:27:35,583 --> 00:27:36,572
来
461
00:27:40,375 --> 00:27:41,740
今天这摊我请
462
00:27:43,125 --> 00:27:45,992
这件事情 以后最好不要再提了
463
00:27:51,708 --> 00:27:53,915
大哥 要不要动他
464
00:27:54,375 --> 00:27:56,741
现在没有人 也没有钱
465
00:27:56,875 --> 00:27:58,331
动个屁啊
466
00:28:02,625 --> 00:28:04,866
你没有人 没有钱
467
00:28:05,542 --> 00:28:07,282
但是你有朋友
468
00:28:12,333 --> 00:28:13,448
琛哥
469
00:28:13,583 --> 00:28:17,121
他不是在无间道里面早就挂了吗
470
00:28:18,208 --> 00:28:20,244
这里是大尾鲈鳗
471
00:28:20,375 --> 00:28:21,831
看清楚
472
00:28:22,458 --> 00:28:23,789
天天哥
473
00:28:24,958 --> 00:28:26,448
天天哥 什么意思
474
00:28:26,875 --> 00:28:28,706
E-very-day
475
00:28:28,833 --> 00:28:31,074
矮 肥 短
476
00:28:31,208 --> 00:28:32,323
知道吗
477
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:43,160
苍蝇
478
00:28:49,042 --> 00:28:50,248
我来
479
00:28:50,375 --> 00:28:51,660
就是为了她
480
00:28:56,625 --> 00:28:58,365
她是我最爱的女人
481
00:28:58,500 --> 00:29:01,287
却偷走我最重要的东西
482
00:29:01,833 --> 00:29:02,822
是什么
483
00:29:08,417 --> 00:29:09,406
蚂蚁
484
00:29:10,292 --> 00:29:11,873
什么意思啊
485
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:13,786
你就直说嘛
486
00:29:15,333 --> 00:29:16,869
帮我找到她
487
00:29:18,333 --> 00:29:20,824
我就帮你干掉大尾
488
00:29:21,708 --> 00:29:24,040
但是这个事情必须要保密
489
00:29:24,500 --> 00:29:25,285
保密
490
00:29:25,417 --> 00:29:26,782
否则的话
491
00:29:45,208 --> 00:29:45,993
苍蝇
492
00:29:50,625 --> 00:29:52,240
结婚真的有那么重要吗
493
00:29:52,375 --> 00:29:53,911
重要喔
494
00:29:55,250 --> 00:29:57,582
我一直觉得只要我们两个人相爱
495
00:29:57,708 --> 00:29:58,993
一起生活
496
00:29:59,125 --> 00:30:00,456
一起养孩子
497
00:30:00,583 --> 00:30:01,993
就很好了啊
498
00:30:02,542 --> 00:30:04,032
就算真的要结婚
499
00:30:04,167 --> 00:30:06,158
也不能随随便便嘛
500
00:30:06,583 --> 00:30:09,040
我也没有资格讲你
501
00:30:09,167 --> 00:30:10,907
我跟你娜姨
502
00:30:11,792 --> 00:30:13,748
我常常要找她结婚
503
00:30:13,875 --> 00:30:16,161
她常常拿那件礼服在看
504
00:30:16,292 --> 00:30:18,032
说她要等一个人
505
00:30:20,125 --> 00:30:22,332
妳看这件看几年了
506
00:30:22,458 --> 00:30:24,619
都还没做好
507
00:30:25,333 --> 00:30:27,198
妳什么时候要穿
508
00:30:30,708 --> 00:30:31,993
我在等一个人
509
00:30:33,708 --> 00:30:35,699
等一个人
510
00:30:35,833 --> 00:30:36,572
等谁
511
00:30:36,708 --> 00:30:37,823
我怎么知道
512
00:30:37,958 --> 00:30:38,868
老王喔
513
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:39,659
老王
514
00:30:39,792 --> 00:30:41,373
你不要乱说喔
515
00:30:41,625 --> 00:30:42,705
如果被她听到
516
00:30:42,833 --> 00:30:45,119
你的蛋蛋会被她捏破
517
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:02,206
赞喔
518
00:31:18,167 --> 00:31:19,907
什么啦 你在吵什么啦
519
00:31:20,042 --> 00:31:20,997
看什么啦
520
00:31:21,125 --> 00:31:23,207
她在做 我们不看
521
00:31:23,333 --> 00:31:24,413
她没面子耶
522
00:31:24,542 --> 00:31:25,952
知道吗
523
00:31:47,792 --> 00:31:49,202
谢谢你
524
00:31:57,250 --> 00:31:58,456
525
00:32:00,833 --> 00:32:03,495
526
00:32:12,667 --> 00:32:14,532
527
00:32:16,542 --> 00:32:20,080
528
00:32:32,750 --> 00:32:34,365
529
00:32:35,667 --> 00:32:43,415
530
00:33:17,917 --> 00:33:19,123
531
00:33:19,958 --> 00:33:23,371
532
00:33:40,208 --> 00:33:40,822
娜…
533
00:33:44,750 --> 00:33:46,581
娜姨…
534
00:33:52,625 --> 00:33:53,956
耳朵会断
535
00:33:54,417 --> 00:33:55,782
耳朵会断掉啦
536
00:34:33,750 --> 00:34:35,706
（娶我）
537
00:34:47,708 --> 00:34:50,620
对…
538
00:34:50,750 --> 00:34:52,706
我们真的很有默契耶
539
00:34:52,833 --> 00:34:54,073
真的
540
00:34:54,542 --> 00:34:56,203
可以…
541
00:34:56,792 --> 00:34:59,374
妳想要怎么样我都可以啊
542
00:34:59,875 --> 00:35:00,614
好啊
543
00:35:01,250 --> 00:35:02,956
她当然不知道啊…
544
00:35:03,083 --> 00:35:05,449
对啊 我怎么会让她知道
545
00:35:08,208 --> 00:35:09,539
我再打给妳
546
00:35:10,750 --> 00:35:11,956
知道什么
547
00:35:12,625 --> 00:35:13,990
我不知道啊
548
00:35:14,125 --> 00:35:15,490
你在跟谁讲电话
549
00:35:16,875 --> 00:35:18,536
男人的事 妳不要管
550
00:35:20,792 --> 00:35:21,702
我看
551
00:35:21,833 --> 00:35:22,322
看什么
552
00:35:22,458 --> 00:35:23,789
手机
553
00:35:24,292 --> 00:35:25,372
那妳亲我一下
554
00:35:25,458 --> 00:35:26,117
三
555
00:35:27,458 --> 00:35:27,947
二
556
00:35:28,083 --> 00:35:29,573
你给我
557
00:35:32,083 --> 00:35:32,993
删掉了
558
00:36:10,917 --> 00:36:12,077
你妈的 疯婆子
559
00:36:12,208 --> 00:36:13,664
是没长眼睛喔
560
00:36:13,792 --> 00:36:14,781
看
561
00:36:25,375 --> 00:36:26,285
好香喔你
562
00:36:26,417 --> 00:36:27,406
好可爱喔
563
00:36:27,583 --> 00:36:28,993
走啰 上车吧
564
00:36:49,750 --> 00:36:50,830
赌烂特攻队
565
00:36:50,958 --> 00:36:51,993
签名…
566
00:36:52,125 --> 00:36:53,160
来 签名…签…
567
00:36:53,292 --> 00:36:54,532
帮我追前面那台车
568
00:36:54,667 --> 00:36:55,156
走
569
00:36:55,250 --> 00:36:56,581
小姐 妳的安全帽呢
570
00:36:57,083 --> 00:36:58,698
追捕辣手催花世纪淫魔
571
00:36:58,833 --> 00:36:59,618
不拘小节啦
572
00:36:59,750 --> 00:37:00,239
走
573
00:37:00,333 --> 00:37:02,949
好 走
574
00:37:03,083 --> 00:37:04,698
左…
575
00:37:04,833 --> 00:37:05,322
左转
576
00:37:05,417 --> 00:37:06,748
右转
577
00:37:06,875 --> 00:37:07,489
右转啦
578
00:37:07,625 --> 00:37:08,114
右转
579
00:37:08,250 --> 00:37:08,830
右转啦
580
00:37:08,958 --> 00:37:10,289
你不要左转
581
00:37:10,417 --> 00:37:12,373
*$^&@!%+” ^#
582
00:37:29,417 --> 00:37:31,078
停
583
00:37:31,958 --> 00:37:33,073
加油
584
00:37:35,583 --> 00:37:36,538
我扶妳…
585
00:38:18,833 --> 00:38:19,322
不好意思喔
586
00:38:19,417 --> 00:38:21,624
没有戴安全帽要罚五百元
587
00:40:04,708 --> 00:40:06,790
（天旱停水 暂停营业）
588
00:40:06,917 --> 00:40:07,872
〈下个月四号开始〉
589
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:10,082
〈确定开始实施第三阶段限水〉
590
00:40:10,208 --> 00:40:11,573
〈民生以及工业用水〉
591
00:40:11,708 --> 00:40:13,869
〈都将供五休二〉
592
00:40:40,417 --> 00:40:41,702
来了啦
593
00:40:43,458 --> 00:40:44,538
水来了
594
00:40:44,667 --> 00:40:46,077
省着点用
595
00:40:46,208 --> 00:40:48,449
身体洗一洗 那个水不要倒掉
596
00:40:48,583 --> 00:40:50,665
留着给大家冲马桶
597
00:40:51,625 --> 00:40:53,331
我把洗完的水留给你洗
598
00:40:53,458 --> 00:40:54,994
这样最省了
599
00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:02,115
最好是两个人一起洗
600
00:41:02,250 --> 00:41:03,535
这样最省
601
00:41:05,417 --> 00:41:06,372
姊夫
602
00:41:06,500 --> 00:41:07,330
快来救我
603
00:41:07,458 --> 00:41:10,450
怎样…
604
00:41:10,583 --> 00:41:12,119
好可怕喔 有蟑螂
605
00:41:12,250 --> 00:41:13,456
蟑螂在哪里
606
00:41:13,583 --> 00:41:14,743
在那里
607
00:41:16,625 --> 00:41:18,161
在这里…
608
00:41:19,625 --> 00:41:21,081
在这里…
609
00:41:21,208 --> 00:41:23,244
在这里 好可怕喔
610
00:41:24,500 --> 00:41:25,660
姊夫
611
00:41:25,792 --> 00:41:27,328
人家好害怕喔
612
00:41:27,458 --> 00:41:28,698
不要怕 有我在
613
00:41:28,833 --> 00:41:29,743
放心
614
00:41:29,875 --> 00:41:31,786
蟑螂真的好可怕
615
00:41:31,917 --> 00:41:32,952
你不要走嘛
616
00:41:33,083 --> 00:41:34,698
为什么不要走
617
00:41:34,833 --> 00:41:35,413
姊夫
618
00:41:35,542 --> 00:41:38,329
你要不要再猜猜我几岁呀
619
00:41:38,917 --> 00:41:40,202
不行…
620
00:41:40,333 --> 00:41:41,118
不行摸
621
00:41:41,250 --> 00:41:42,239
为什么不行
622
00:41:42,375 --> 00:41:45,697
之前因为我不知道妳是我老婆的妹妹啊
623
00:41:45,833 --> 00:41:46,447
现在我知道了
624
00:41:46,583 --> 00:41:48,824
妳算起来是我的小姨子
625
00:41:48,958 --> 00:41:50,243
那又怎样
626
00:41:50,917 --> 00:41:52,999
反正我姊又不在这里
627
00:41:53,125 --> 00:41:54,706
妳姊很厉害的
628
00:41:54,833 --> 00:41:56,573
她身后还有两只眼睛耶
629
00:41:56,708 --> 00:41:57,788
我不管
630
00:41:57,917 --> 00:42:00,954
但是人家好想要
631
00:42:01,333 --> 00:42:02,493
要…
632
00:42:03,208 --> 00:42:07,201
人家好想要你留在这边陪人家聊天喔
633
00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:11,285
你知道吗
634
00:42:11,417 --> 00:42:13,874
人家以前 有一个很好很好
635
00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:15,911
又很相爱的男朋友
636
00:42:16,917 --> 00:42:17,702
结果…
637
00:42:17,833 --> 00:42:19,198
结果怎么了
638
00:42:19,875 --> 00:42:22,662
结果有一次 我们在洗澡的时候
639
00:42:22,792 --> 00:42:24,783
他竟然放一个屁
640
00:42:25,917 --> 00:42:28,203
男人放屁…
641
00:42:28,333 --> 00:42:30,790
我不止放屁 我连屎都拉
642
00:42:31,417 --> 00:42:32,577
你不知道
643
00:42:32,708 --> 00:42:34,164
他放屁的时候
644
00:42:34,292 --> 00:42:36,123
喷出一个保险套耶
645
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:40,365
太扯了啦
646
00:42:40,500 --> 00:42:42,707
放屁会放出保…
647
00:42:47,292 --> 00:42:49,032
老婆大人妳来啦
648
00:42:51,292 --> 00:42:52,998
妳针对我就好
649
00:42:54,375 --> 00:42:55,831
你在这干嘛
650
00:42:55,958 --> 00:42:57,198
我 大…
651
00:42:57,333 --> 00:42:58,448
大便
652
00:43:00,458 --> 00:43:02,073
大便你会流鼻血
653
00:43:02,750 --> 00:43:04,286
我太用力了
654
00:43:05,375 --> 00:43:07,081
你的屁股长在脸上吗
655
00:43:07,542 --> 00:43:09,032
你给我出来
656
00:43:17,083 --> 00:43:18,948
这轿子分做两种
657
00:43:19,083 --> 00:43:20,493
武轿和文轿…
658
00:43:21,042 --> 00:43:22,031
我知道
659
00:43:22,708 --> 00:43:25,495
文轿（文鸟）是天上飞的
660
00:43:25,625 --> 00:43:26,660
然后武轿
661
00:43:26,792 --> 00:43:27,827
午觉嘛
662
00:43:27,958 --> 00:43:29,243
用来睡的
663
00:43:29,958 --> 00:43:31,539
妳在乱讲什么
664
00:43:31,667 --> 00:43:32,372
要尊敬一点
665
00:43:32,500 --> 00:43:33,706
不是这样的
666
00:43:33,833 --> 00:43:34,822
我跟你们说
667
00:43:34,958 --> 00:43:36,823
文轿比较重
668
00:43:37,292 --> 00:43:38,748
因为有轿顶
669
00:43:38,875 --> 00:43:40,581
所以我们扛的时候
670
00:43:40,708 --> 00:43:41,493
脚步要扎实
671
00:43:41,625 --> 00:43:43,286
要求只有这样而已
672
00:43:43,792 --> 00:43:45,328
九娘妈不一样
673
00:43:46,083 --> 00:43:47,038
九娘妈
674
00:43:47,667 --> 00:43:49,203
武轿 比较轻
675
00:43:49,333 --> 00:43:51,073
比较适合表演
676
00:43:53,625 --> 00:43:54,990
你们吉伦巴会跳吗
677
00:43:55,125 --> 00:43:57,992
一二三 澎恰恰
678
00:44:01,042 --> 00:44:02,998
正白旗…
679
00:44:03,125 --> 00:44:04,706
〈正白旗在追牠〉
680
00:44:04,833 --> 00:44:06,369
〈外面还有闪耀钻皇〉
681
00:44:06,500 --> 00:44:08,536
〈接近终点 帝豪宝贝赢了〉
682
00:44:08,667 --> 00:44:09,622
给老娘气死
683
00:44:09,750 --> 00:44:10,705
应该冲的不冲
684
00:44:10,833 --> 00:44:12,118
不应该冲的就胡乱撞
685
00:44:12,250 --> 00:44:13,911
看
686
00:44:18,667 --> 00:44:20,373
我拜托妳不要这样好不好
687
00:44:21,000 --> 00:44:23,036
妳在家里怎么闹我不管
688
00:44:23,167 --> 00:44:24,247
现在是整个村子的事情
689
00:44:24,375 --> 00:44:26,036
妳尊重一点
690
00:44:26,708 --> 00:44:27,914
尊重
691
00:44:28,542 --> 00:44:29,907
那妳把我害成这样的时候
692
00:44:30,042 --> 00:44:31,657
有没有想过要尊重我
693
00:44:35,208 --> 00:44:36,869
这样妳开心了吧
694
00:44:38,250 --> 00:44:39,706
原来妳是回来报仇的
695
00:44:40,375 --> 00:44:41,330
没有错
696
00:44:41,708 --> 00:44:43,869
我等这一天已经等很久了
697
00:44:44,000 --> 00:44:46,241
我不会这么容易就放过妳的
698
00:44:49,500 --> 00:44:51,240
我已经自责二十年了
699
00:44:52,250 --> 00:44:53,990
妳还要我怎样
700
00:44:54,125 --> 00:44:55,490
妳自责
701
00:44:55,625 --> 00:44:57,035
自责就没事了
702
00:44:57,167 --> 00:44:58,907
我的人生谁赔给我
703
00:44:59,042 --> 00:45:01,624
是谁把我害成这样的 妳说啊
704
00:45:02,542 --> 00:45:03,657
姊 妳吃一点啦
705
00:45:41,500 --> 00:45:44,537
妳认一下那天砍人的有谁
706
00:45:46,500 --> 00:45:48,365
好像没有在这里
707
00:45:48,917 --> 00:45:52,614
〈相思好比小蚂蚁〉
708
00:45:52,750 --> 00:45:56,413
〈爬呀爬在我心底〉
709
00:45:56,542 --> 00:46:00,410
〈尤其在那静静的寂寞夜里〉
710
00:46:00,542 --> 00:46:03,454
〈它就在我心游移〉
711
00:46:03,583 --> 00:46:07,701
〈啊 叫我好想你〉
712
00:46:07,833 --> 00:46:11,371
〈相呀相思〉
713
00:46:11,500 --> 00:46:15,163
〈说是痛苦也甜蜜〉
714
00:46:15,292 --> 00:46:19,205
〈让那寂寞在我心田扩大了面积〉
715
00:46:19,333 --> 00:46:22,905
〈别让那你我的爱缩短距离〉
716
00:46:23,042 --> 00:46:25,909
〈所以我好愿意〉
717
00:46:26,417 --> 00:46:27,748
愿意是吧
718
00:46:28,500 --> 00:46:29,364
喝一杯吧
719
00:46:30,250 --> 00:46:31,581
我 我不会喝酒
720
00:46:31,708 --> 00:46:32,367
不会喝
721
00:46:32,500 --> 00:46:33,615
这样最好啦
722
00:46:33,750 --> 00:46:35,581
妳姊出场了
723
00:46:35,708 --> 00:46:38,620
今天晚上我带妳去找乐子 好吗
724
00:46:38,750 --> 00:46:39,580
不用
725
00:46:39,708 --> 00:46:41,573
没关系 不用紧张
726
00:46:42,917 --> 00:46:44,157
走啦…
727
00:46:44,583 --> 00:46:45,288
姊
728
00:46:45,542 --> 00:46:48,454
我被人带走的时候妳在哪里
729
00:46:50,458 --> 00:46:53,450
在我最需要妳的时候 妳又在哪里
730
00:46:55,667 --> 00:46:57,703
妳当初把我放着不管
731
00:46:58,250 --> 00:47:00,741
妳现在有什么资格来管我
732
00:47:07,250 --> 00:47:08,865
妳怎么不说话
733
00:47:10,042 --> 00:47:11,782
妳为什么要把我丢下
734
00:47:12,958 --> 00:47:15,165
妳为什么要丢下我不管
735
00:47:15,292 --> 00:47:16,452
妳说啊
736
00:47:35,333 --> 00:47:38,780
（两杯米 三碗水 外锅半碗水）
737
00:47:38,917 --> 00:47:43,707
（微波炉请小心使用）
738
00:47:43,833 --> 00:47:47,746
（咖啡豆一小杯 水一杯半 煮三分半钟）
739
00:47:47,875 --> 00:47:51,914
（小孩不能拿刀）
740
00:47:52,042 --> 00:47:54,784
（厨房不要养蚂蚁）
741
00:47:59,417 --> 00:48:01,499
（早 晚浇花一次）
742
00:48:13,875 --> 00:48:15,740
我走了
743
00:48:17,458 --> 00:48:20,245
反正我在这个家也是多余的
744
00:48:20,792 --> 00:48:23,909
我没有办法再照顾这个家
745
00:48:24,042 --> 00:48:26,658
家事我都写在便利贴上
746
00:48:27,125 --> 00:48:28,865
不要找我
747
00:48:29,542 --> 00:48:31,783
你这个爱情的骗子
748
00:48:31,917 --> 00:48:32,906
我问你
749
00:48:33,333 --> 00:48:34,573
你的良心
750
00:48:34,708 --> 00:48:35,197
在
751
00:48:35,333 --> 00:48:35,992
哪
752
00:48:36,125 --> 00:48:37,160
里
753
00:48:46,125 --> 00:48:47,911
各位乡亲父老
754
00:48:48,042 --> 00:48:50,408
要领水的人赶快过来排队
755
00:48:50,542 --> 00:48:52,328
赶快过来排队
756
00:48:52,458 --> 00:48:54,119
不要挤…
757
00:48:54,250 --> 00:48:55,581
也不要抢喔
758
00:48:55,708 --> 00:48:57,744
也不要贪心啊
759
00:48:58,792 --> 00:49:00,748
这是给你训练身体
760
00:49:07,625 --> 00:49:11,117
没用的东西 你才拿两桶而已
761
00:49:11,250 --> 00:49:15,414
我拿四桶都不累 你拿两桶就倒了
762
00:49:17,500 --> 00:49:18,535
喂…
763
00:49:19,667 --> 00:49:21,032
节省水
764
00:49:21,708 --> 00:49:23,244
喝一点点就好
765
00:49:24,208 --> 00:49:26,745
对…
766
00:49:27,292 --> 00:49:31,285
现在缺水 你不能像这样喝
767
00:49:33,792 --> 00:49:35,373
我是在教你啦
768
00:49:37,875 --> 00:49:40,457
暂停营业都不看招牌
769
00:49:45,792 --> 00:49:46,998
谁
770
00:49:48,000 --> 00:49:49,615
不好意思 快递
771
00:49:52,333 --> 00:49:53,413
光碟
772
00:49:54,333 --> 00:49:55,243
那不就是A片
773
00:49:56,500 --> 00:49:58,365
这A片一定很好看
774
00:49:58,500 --> 00:50:00,912
我就没付钱了还寄来
775
00:50:01,792 --> 00:50:03,157
姊姊
776
00:50:03,958 --> 00:50:07,325
我这段影片 是要录给妳看的
777
00:50:09,333 --> 00:50:10,948
我一直想知道
778
00:50:11,958 --> 00:50:15,871
一个人的妳 到底过得好吗
779
00:50:18,542 --> 00:50:19,952
现在我知道
780
00:50:20,500 --> 00:50:21,956
妳不再是一个人了
781
00:50:22,792 --> 00:50:24,532
虽然这段时间
782
00:50:25,458 --> 00:50:27,699
我都故意惹妳生气
783
00:50:28,250 --> 00:50:32,072
我是希望 妳能更在乎我一些
784
00:50:33,583 --> 00:50:35,244
妳不要放在心上喔
785
00:50:38,083 --> 00:50:40,620
姊 我跟妳说
786
00:50:41,667 --> 00:50:43,874
妳要好好珍惜大尾
787
00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:46,707
还有小贺和丑弟他们
788
00:50:48,167 --> 00:50:49,907
因为和我比起来
789
00:50:51,458 --> 00:50:55,280
他们跟妳 更像是一家人
790
00:50:58,167 --> 00:50:59,247
姊
791
00:51:00,167 --> 00:51:02,408
不管过去我们怎么样
792
00:51:03,125 --> 00:51:05,036
希望妳永远要记得
793
00:51:06,167 --> 00:51:08,283
我永远爱妳
794
00:51:09,583 --> 00:51:11,995
妳永远是我姊姊
795
00:51:19,792 --> 00:51:21,407
我爱妳唷
796
00:51:28,417 --> 00:51:29,156
喂
797
00:51:29,792 --> 00:51:31,657
停水啦 没有水
798
00:51:31,792 --> 00:51:34,124
等有水了大家再来住啦
799
00:51:34,250 --> 00:51:35,160
不好意思啦
800
00:51:35,292 --> 00:51:36,122
大哥
801
00:51:36,250 --> 00:51:37,786
猜猜我是谁
802
00:51:37,917 --> 00:51:38,827
什么猜你是谁
803
00:51:38,958 --> 00:51:42,246
老子没有那个美国时间猜你是谁啦
804
00:51:43,125 --> 00:51:44,706
你听不出来吧
805
00:51:45,333 --> 00:51:48,655
我老爸奇大 你总该记得吧
806
00:51:49,833 --> 00:51:50,948
小奇大
807
00:51:51,083 --> 00:51:52,414
会怕就好
808
00:51:52,708 --> 00:51:53,697
我跟你说
809
00:51:53,833 --> 00:51:55,949
先让你听一个人的声音
810
00:51:56,458 --> 00:51:58,494
你应该知道她是什么人
811
00:51:58,917 --> 00:51:59,747
来
812
00:52:19,625 --> 00:52:21,741
想要你女儿平安无事
813
00:52:22,583 --> 00:52:24,369
把你小姨子交出来
814
00:52:36,208 --> 00:52:38,745
还没讲地址跟时间啊
815
00:52:41,417 --> 00:52:42,873
再打一次
816
00:52:49,625 --> 00:52:50,740
大哥喔
817
00:52:50,875 --> 00:52:52,661
猜猜我是谁
818
00:52:53,750 --> 00:52:54,739
猜猜你是谁
819
00:52:54,875 --> 00:52:56,331
讲过了啦
820
00:52:58,417 --> 00:53:00,578
老子已经退出江湖了
821
00:53:01,250 --> 00:53:02,660
真的要逼我
822
00:53:03,417 --> 00:53:06,250
出来玩 迟早要还
823
00:53:09,125 --> 00:53:10,615
人在江湖
824
00:53:11,458 --> 00:53:12,994
身不由己
825
00:53:13,792 --> 00:53:15,498
既然小奇大敢来
826
00:53:15,625 --> 00:53:16,990
绝对没有好意
827
00:53:18,375 --> 00:53:19,990
个人造业个人担
828
00:53:20,125 --> 00:53:21,035
你们去找帮手
829
00:53:21,167 --> 00:53:21,906
我去找妹妹
830
00:53:22,042 --> 00:53:23,122
等一下
831
00:53:23,250 --> 00:53:24,410
妳去找人
832
00:53:24,958 --> 00:53:26,949
我孙子要叫谁顾啊
833
00:53:27,792 --> 00:53:29,453
可以先交给我妹妹带
834
00:53:30,000 --> 00:53:31,206
你妹妹
835
00:53:31,333 --> 00:53:33,665
老子怎么不知道你什么时候有一个妹妹
836
00:53:34,167 --> 00:53:34,872
不是啦
837
00:53:35,000 --> 00:53:36,661
我爸在外面偷生的啦
838
00:53:37,375 --> 00:53:38,410
现在先不要讲这些
839
00:53:38,542 --> 00:53:39,827
救人比较重要啦
840
00:53:39,958 --> 00:53:40,868
好
841
00:53:41,458 --> 00:53:43,540
既然要逼老子重出江湖
842
00:53:43,667 --> 00:53:46,500
让你知道大尾鲈鳗的厉害
843
00:54:03,250 --> 00:54:06,447
〈跟我来练舞功 我来去无影踪〉
844
00:54:06,583 --> 00:54:10,371
〈跟我来练舞功 我就是一阵风〉
845
00:54:16,417 --> 00:54:18,658
〈奈 就是安奈〉
846
00:54:19,125 --> 00:54:22,913
〈像剖西瓜 这呢简单的问题〉
847
00:54:23,042 --> 00:54:25,624
〈奈 就是安奈〉
848
00:54:25,750 --> 00:54:29,038
〈像放风筝 亲像鸟只自由飞〉
849
00:54:29,750 --> 00:54:32,036
〈噢 青春短短〉
850
00:54:32,458 --> 00:54:35,746
〈呒免歹谢 脚步有进搁有退〉
851
00:54:36,375 --> 00:54:38,787
〈噢 裙穿短短〉
852
00:54:38,917 --> 00:54:42,739
〈麦想暇最 随着音乐玲珑旋〉
853
00:54:42,875 --> 00:54:45,787
〈Everybody 哥哥牵妹妹〉
854
00:54:46,250 --> 00:54:49,083
〈Everybody 阿桑牵阿伯〉
855
00:54:49,583 --> 00:54:52,450
〈Everybody 练到一百岁〉
856
00:54:52,917 --> 00:54:55,829
〈Everybody 心情好甲像十八〉
857
00:54:56,208 --> 00:54:59,245
〈跟我来练舞功 我来去无影踪〉
858
00:54:59,625 --> 00:55:03,538
〈跟我来练舞功 我不是女神龙〉
859
00:55:09,333 --> 00:55:11,995
〈奈 就是安奈〉
860
00:55:12,125 --> 00:55:15,822
〈像剖西瓜 这呢简单的问题〉
861
00:55:15,958 --> 00:55:18,449
〈奈 就是安奈〉
862
00:55:18,750 --> 00:55:22,322
〈像放风筝 亲像鸟只自由飞〉
863
00:55:22,792 --> 00:55:24,999
〈噢 青春短短〉
864
00:55:25,375 --> 00:55:29,163
〈呒免歹谢 脚步有进搁有退〉
865
00:55:29,292 --> 00:55:31,874
〈噢 裙穿短短〉
866
00:55:32,000 --> 00:55:35,072
〈麦想暇最 随着音乐玲珑旋〉
867
00:55:35,917 --> 00:55:38,909
〈Everybody 哥哥牵妹妹〉
868
00:55:39,208 --> 00:55:42,166
〈Everybody 阿桑牵阿伯〉
869
00:55:42,542 --> 00:55:45,375
〈Everybody 练到一百岁〉
870
00:55:45,875 --> 00:55:48,867
〈Everybody 心情好甲像十八〉
871
00:55:49,125 --> 00:55:52,117
〈跟我来练舞功 我来去无影踪〉
872
00:55:52,458 --> 00:55:55,530
〈跟我来练舞功 我就是一阵风〉
873
00:55:55,792 --> 00:55:58,829
〈跟我来练舞功 我来去无影踪〉
874
00:55:59,125 --> 00:56:03,038
〈跟我来练舞功 我不是女神龙〉
875
00:56:15,250 --> 00:56:16,990
九娘妈在上
876
00:56:17,750 --> 00:56:19,581
信女乞求九娘妈
877
00:56:20,125 --> 00:56:22,958
可否告诉我 怎样才能找到我妹妹
878
00:56:25,125 --> 00:56:27,582
九娘妈在上 请九娘妈指示
879
00:56:27,708 --> 00:56:30,415
哪里来 哪里去
880
00:56:33,833 --> 00:56:35,323
种子撒在哪里
881
00:56:35,458 --> 00:56:37,449
花就会开在哪里
882
00:56:38,083 --> 00:56:40,244
妳若想修剪花木
883
00:56:40,375 --> 00:56:44,243
总得回到当初发芽的地方
884
00:56:45,875 --> 00:56:46,955
什么意思
885
00:56:49,417 --> 00:56:50,748
什么意思 我能说的都说了
886
00:56:50,875 --> 00:56:51,910
自己去想
887
00:56:52,042 --> 00:56:53,373
我还要包生儿子啊
888
00:56:53,500 --> 00:56:54,410
是
889
00:57:00,125 --> 00:57:04,368
890
00:57:09,917 --> 00:57:11,373
肚子有够饿
891
00:57:11,708 --> 00:57:13,414
一边买 一边吃
892
00:57:13,542 --> 00:57:15,078
再来找
893
00:57:15,208 --> 00:57:16,163
要吃什么
894
00:57:16,292 --> 00:57:19,034
一人点一样 你要点什么
895
00:57:19,917 --> 00:57:20,827
狗腿排
896
00:57:20,958 --> 00:57:21,822
你狗腿排
897
00:57:21,958 --> 00:57:23,414
那我热鸡鸡
898
00:57:26,917 --> 00:57:28,373
看你娘勒
899
00:57:28,500 --> 00:57:30,832
什么热鸡鸡 你在耍我喔
900
00:57:30,958 --> 00:57:32,539
就是说啊 白目
901
00:57:34,167 --> 00:57:36,579
为什么这只猪可以得金牌
902
00:57:36,708 --> 00:57:38,699
我这只金牌猪会得金牌
903
00:57:38,833 --> 00:57:40,619
牠的特点是什么你知道吗
904
00:57:40,750 --> 00:57:42,957
就是每天在配种的时候
905
00:57:43,083 --> 00:57:46,450
可以配种两次 三次 四次这样配不停的
906
00:57:46,583 --> 00:57:49,416
你看 你看 一天可以好几次
907
00:57:50,083 --> 00:57:51,323
请问一下
908
00:57:51,458 --> 00:57:52,618
猪公在配种的时候
909
00:57:52,750 --> 00:57:54,911
是不是都跟同一只母猪
910
00:57:55,042 --> 00:57:56,248
当然不同啊
911
00:57:56,375 --> 00:57:56,989
不然我问你
912
00:57:57,125 --> 00:57:59,161
你每次去上酒店的时候
913
00:57:59,250 --> 00:58:00,330
你叫的女人
914
00:58:00,458 --> 00:58:02,494
怎么可能是同一个 对不对
915
00:58:02,625 --> 00:58:03,740
对
916
00:58:03,875 --> 00:58:04,864
妳看…
917
00:58:05,000 --> 00:58:06,956
要多换换口味嘛
918
00:58:07,083 --> 00:58:09,039
每次都同一个 谁吃得下
919
00:58:09,167 --> 00:58:10,452
我呸
920
00:58:10,750 --> 00:58:11,830
猪肉西
921
00:58:11,958 --> 00:58:12,697
喂
922
00:58:13,167 --> 00:58:14,156
师父
923
00:58:15,750 --> 00:58:18,332
大小白痴又来了
924
00:58:19,750 --> 00:58:21,832
自从娶了你们师娘以后
925
00:58:21,958 --> 00:58:24,745
我就退出江湖 不问世事了
926
00:58:25,292 --> 00:58:29,365
你看你师母 标准瘦田会吸水
927
00:58:29,500 --> 00:58:31,036
就像抽水机
928
00:58:31,167 --> 00:58:34,955
普通的男人 两三回合就被吸得干巴巴
929
00:58:35,458 --> 00:58:40,202
好险 你师父我还练过「九阴真功」
930
00:58:40,333 --> 00:58:42,494
这块就是我在吊的啦
931
00:58:42,625 --> 00:58:43,455
真的假的
932
00:58:43,583 --> 00:58:46,746
我下面最多可以吊到三百斤
933
00:58:48,083 --> 00:58:51,530
所以你师娘才会服服贴贴
934
00:58:51,667 --> 00:58:53,578
天天笑咪咪
935
00:58:55,583 --> 00:58:58,040
我的妈啊 吊三百斤
936
00:58:58,167 --> 00:58:59,828
吊一只牛耶
937
00:59:04,583 --> 00:59:05,322
师父啊
938
00:59:05,458 --> 00:59:07,915
那个法拉利被你开走了喔
939
00:59:08,042 --> 00:59:09,157
法拉利算什么
940
00:59:09,292 --> 00:59:10,247
老子年轻的时候
941
00:59:10,375 --> 00:59:11,911
一台这么大台 像卡车一样的
942
00:59:12,042 --> 00:59:12,997
老子也飙过
943
00:59:17,917 --> 00:59:20,533
你这次想要把你女儿救出来
944
00:59:20,667 --> 00:59:24,956
上次教你们的一指神功已经没效了
945
00:59:26,042 --> 00:59:27,157
为什么
946
00:59:27,292 --> 00:59:31,205
你们都没有在看小奇大的脸书粉丝团喔
947
00:59:33,042 --> 00:59:35,033
传说中的钢铁贞操带
948
00:59:35,167 --> 00:59:38,989
是史上保护屁屁最难攻破的秘密武器
949
00:59:39,667 --> 00:59:42,454
据说当年陈龙在火烧岛的时候
950
00:59:42,583 --> 00:59:44,744
就是靠着钢铁贞操带
951
00:59:44,875 --> 00:59:48,117
才能渡过无数个漫漫长夜
952
00:59:49,625 --> 00:59:51,286
但是 很可惜
953
00:59:52,208 --> 00:59:54,824
钢铁贞操带的破解大法
954
00:59:54,958 --> 00:59:58,371
经过几次战乱以后已经失传了
955
01:00:00,708 --> 01:00:01,914
那怎么办
956
01:00:02,042 --> 01:00:03,248
别怕
957
01:00:04,167 --> 01:00:07,204
我从你们师娘的性癖好里
958
01:00:07,833 --> 01:00:10,119
领悟出了破解之道
959
01:00:10,833 --> 01:00:12,118
忍耐喔
960
01:00:13,417 --> 01:00:15,783
我的猪脑会破掉啦
961
01:00:26,458 --> 01:00:27,072
如何
962
01:00:27,208 --> 01:00:29,244
有没有感觉很舒服
963
01:00:30,583 --> 01:00:31,618
师父啊
964
01:00:32,042 --> 01:00:37,332
练这个铁头功 跟贞操带有什么关系
965
01:00:37,458 --> 01:00:39,289
一点关系都没有
966
01:00:39,417 --> 01:00:42,033
这完全是我老婆看你不顺眼
967
01:00:42,167 --> 01:00:43,703
她觉得你长的很…
968
01:00:44,000 --> 01:00:45,331
你就是很欠扁
969
01:00:45,458 --> 01:00:48,074
老娘就是看你不爽啦
970
01:00:48,208 --> 01:00:48,993
对
971
01:00:50,417 --> 01:00:52,453
那我不就白挨打了
972
01:00:52,583 --> 01:00:54,699
不不不…不会白挨打
973
01:00:54,833 --> 01:00:56,824
你为了要救你女儿
974
01:00:56,958 --> 01:01:00,906
发挥出这种忍耐度 任凭别人打
975
01:01:01,042 --> 01:01:03,954
这样你就有资格练下一步
976
01:01:04,083 --> 01:01:05,573
就是这个
977
01:01:12,750 --> 01:01:14,536
这个你要是练成
978
01:01:14,667 --> 01:01:17,033
铜墙铁壁你都穿得过去
979
01:01:17,167 --> 01:01:19,203
钢铁贞操带算什么
980
01:01:19,333 --> 01:01:20,914
有洞就插
981
01:01:21,042 --> 01:01:22,828
没洞自己挖
982
01:01:24,708 --> 01:01:26,289
轻一点啦 拜托
983
01:01:26,417 --> 01:01:27,577
为了小芹
984
01:01:27,667 --> 01:01:29,578
你要忍耐喔
985
01:01:33,625 --> 01:01:35,991
我回去叫我女儿不要跟你睡
986
01:01:36,125 --> 01:01:38,036
不要跟你睡
987
01:01:42,125 --> 01:01:43,331
还来
988
01:01:51,833 --> 01:01:52,822
不要晃啦
989
01:01:52,958 --> 01:01:54,164
不要啦
990
01:01:56,000 --> 01:01:57,365
师父啊
991
01:01:57,708 --> 01:02:00,074
这要晃到什么时候
992
01:02:00,208 --> 01:02:02,244
十二点
993
01:02:02,375 --> 01:02:03,239
快到了…
994
01:02:03,375 --> 01:02:04,911
快到了
995
01:02:05,042 --> 01:02:06,953
明晚十二点
996
01:02:08,208 --> 01:02:10,324
要到明晚十二点…
997
01:02:12,917 --> 01:02:16,990
@#$&*%&*%#
998
01:02:22,958 --> 01:02:23,743
抓起来…
999
01:02:23,875 --> 01:02:25,035
带走…
1000
01:02:25,167 --> 01:02:26,031
好好练
1001
01:02:26,167 --> 01:02:29,000
七七四十九天我会回来验收
1002
01:02:29,125 --> 01:02:30,331
都带走啦
1003
01:02:30,458 --> 01:02:32,244
别这么多话 我跟你说
1004
01:02:32,375 --> 01:02:34,991
下次就没有布丁可以吃了
1005
01:02:35,417 --> 01:02:37,783
什么事情 他是怎样了
1006
01:02:39,875 --> 01:02:42,491
先生 你实在很幸运耶
1007
01:02:42,625 --> 01:02:44,411
遇到一个疯子就不简单了
1008
01:02:44,542 --> 01:02:45,907
你还遇到两个
1009
01:02:46,250 --> 01:02:48,286
前面那个猪肉西
1010
01:02:48,417 --> 01:02:50,078
在市场跟别人赌博
1011
01:02:50,208 --> 01:02:52,574
做庄家连输21次
1012
01:02:53,292 --> 01:02:55,078
就这样把整个猪肉摊输掉了
1013
01:02:55,208 --> 01:02:56,869
脑筋就这样短路了
1014
01:02:57,000 --> 01:02:59,161
那两个合起来多厉害
1015
01:02:59,292 --> 01:03:00,452
就像这个啦
1016
01:03:00,583 --> 01:03:02,369
「九阴真功」
1017
01:03:02,500 --> 01:03:04,456
祝福你久久长长啦
1018
01:03:04,583 --> 01:03:06,073
先走不用送了
1019
01:03:06,208 --> 01:03:08,290
喂 别跑…
1020
01:03:09,292 --> 01:03:10,748
一个神经
1021
01:03:10,875 --> 01:03:12,490
一个疯子
1022
01:03:12,625 --> 01:03:14,536
那我吊这个有什么用
1023
01:03:57,792 --> 01:03:58,577
姊
1024
01:03:58,708 --> 01:04:01,199
这件婚纱是做给妳将来结婚穿的
1025
01:04:01,333 --> 01:04:02,163
是喔
1026
01:04:02,708 --> 01:04:05,495
要等我结婚 那不知道要等到什么时候耶
1027
01:04:05,625 --> 01:04:06,364
我不管
1028
01:04:06,500 --> 01:04:10,448
反正我会在妳结婚之前 把它做好
1029
01:04:41,042 --> 01:04:44,534
1030
01:04:48,583 --> 01:04:49,993
谢谢
1031
01:04:51,750 --> 01:04:54,412
琳祖玛 我爱你
1032
01:04:56,292 --> 01:04:57,407
多谢
1033
01:04:57,542 --> 01:05:00,375
琳祖玛 我爱妳
1034
01:05:00,500 --> 01:05:02,081
我也爱你们
1035
01:05:03,750 --> 01:05:06,036
琳祖玛三朵花
1036
01:05:06,750 --> 01:05:08,581
欸 死老头啦
1037
01:05:09,167 --> 01:05:10,498
他怎么来这里
1038
01:05:11,750 --> 01:05:14,036
小芹怎么运气这么差
1039
01:05:14,167 --> 01:05:16,499
老天爷真的没长眼
1040
01:05:16,625 --> 01:05:19,037
小芹这么歹命被绑架
1041
01:05:19,167 --> 01:05:21,328
所以才来拜托妳们三朵花
1042
01:05:21,458 --> 01:05:23,414
帮忙我解围
1043
01:05:23,542 --> 01:05:25,032
但是现在不行耶
1044
01:05:25,167 --> 01:05:26,623
因为我们现在是艺人
1045
01:05:26,750 --> 01:05:27,990
我们出去要化妆
1046
01:05:28,125 --> 01:05:29,160
会被人家偷拍照
1047
01:05:29,292 --> 01:05:30,031
这样不行啦
1048
01:05:30,167 --> 01:05:30,656
对啊
1049
01:05:30,750 --> 01:05:32,331
你知道我们粉丝有多少
1050
01:05:32,458 --> 01:05:34,449
我们是国际巨星
1051
01:05:34,583 --> 01:05:35,072
对啊
1052
01:05:35,167 --> 01:05:36,282
好了啦…
1053
01:05:37,833 --> 01:05:41,075
我们三个很久没有老公了
1054
01:05:41,208 --> 01:05:43,449
我们那里都长蜘蛛丝了
1055
01:05:43,583 --> 01:05:44,242
快来
1056
01:05:44,375 --> 01:05:46,411
来啦…
1057
01:05:46,542 --> 01:05:47,577
现在不行啦
1058
01:05:47,708 --> 01:05:48,367
为什么
1059
01:05:48,500 --> 01:05:50,661
我上次去找那个猪肉西
1060
01:05:50,792 --> 01:05:51,998
去学功夫
1061
01:05:52,125 --> 01:05:53,786
学吊那个三百斤的
1062
01:05:54,250 --> 01:05:54,739
看
1063
01:05:54,833 --> 01:05:56,994
不要在那里吹牛了啦
1064
01:05:57,125 --> 01:05:58,331
髋姊
1065
01:05:58,750 --> 01:05:59,785
这秋梨髋喔
1066
01:05:59,917 --> 01:06:01,657
对啊我们的经纪人髋姐
1067
01:06:01,792 --> 01:06:04,329
她的脸有装潢喔
1068
01:06:05,167 --> 01:06:06,907
你不是要找我们帮忙
1069
01:06:07,042 --> 01:06:07,997
我们髋姊如果不答应
1070
01:06:08,125 --> 01:06:10,286
我们是不可以帮你的
1071
01:06:10,417 --> 01:06:11,031
对啊
1072
01:06:11,167 --> 01:06:12,407
拜托一下啦
1073
01:06:12,542 --> 01:06:15,614
演艺圈的潜规则你应该知道吧
1074
01:06:15,750 --> 01:06:17,331
你有事情要拜托人
1075
01:06:17,458 --> 01:06:19,164
是不用牺牲一下吗
1076
01:06:19,250 --> 01:06:20,330
对嘛
1077
01:06:20,458 --> 01:06:22,494
好妳的意思是条件交换吧
1078
01:06:22,625 --> 01:06:23,956
好那我答应
1079
01:06:24,083 --> 01:06:24,947
但是先讲清楚
1080
01:06:25,083 --> 01:06:26,289
我现在赶时间
1081
01:06:26,417 --> 01:06:27,953
一个人可以四下
1082
01:06:28,083 --> 01:06:29,289
不可以超过四下
1083
01:06:29,417 --> 01:06:30,122
可以啦
1084
01:06:30,250 --> 01:06:31,490
妹妹啊…
1085
01:06:32,250 --> 01:06:33,990
妹妹怎么这么急啊
1086
01:06:34,125 --> 01:06:36,161
夭寿咧
1087
01:06:37,125 --> 01:06:37,910
结束
1088
01:06:38,042 --> 01:06:39,077
来了
1089
01:06:41,875 --> 01:06:43,740
我的妈呀
1090
01:06:44,208 --> 01:06:46,164
乖乖隆地咚
1091
01:06:47,333 --> 01:06:48,448
结束
1092
01:06:48,583 --> 01:06:50,323
轮到我了
1093
01:06:50,458 --> 01:06:52,119
我爸喔
1094
01:06:52,708 --> 01:06:54,573
救人喔
1095
01:06:54,708 --> 01:06:55,197
结束
1096
01:06:55,292 --> 01:06:57,203
咦还没讲啦
1097
01:06:57,333 --> 01:06:58,948
好了啦结束
1098
01:06:59,792 --> 01:07:01,373
我们说好喔
1099
01:07:01,500 --> 01:07:03,036
妳不要像她们这么慢喔
1100
01:07:03,167 --> 01:07:04,156
看 啰唆啦
1101
01:07:04,292 --> 01:07:05,202
老娘很快啦
1102
01:07:05,333 --> 01:07:06,288
不可以超过四喔
1103
01:07:06,417 --> 01:07:08,328
知道啦哭爸啦
1104
01:07:09,375 --> 01:07:11,707
一二三四 二二三四
1105
01:07:11,833 --> 01:07:14,745
三二三四 再来一次
1106
01:07:14,875 --> 01:07:18,413
老子拼四个女人三百多岁
1107
01:07:18,542 --> 01:07:20,328
真的是看琳祖玛
1108
01:07:25,333 --> 01:07:26,948
妳们四个都跑掉
1109
01:07:27,083 --> 01:07:30,280
妳们大家都一二三四再来一次
1110
01:07:30,833 --> 01:07:31,822
年纪都这么大了
1111
01:07:31,958 --> 01:07:34,620
还会相信有潜规则这种事情
1112
01:07:34,750 --> 01:07:36,365
好爽
1113
01:07:41,333 --> 01:07:43,415
我对不起你的阿姨
1114
01:07:45,833 --> 01:07:47,448
我大尾鲈鳗耶
1115
01:07:48,000 --> 01:07:51,447
江湖上多大条的事情都我在处理
1116
01:07:52,042 --> 01:07:55,159
竟然我被这四个女人污辱
1117
01:07:55,875 --> 01:07:58,457
还被素还真的妹妹素珠
1118
01:07:58,583 --> 01:08:00,289
她八十几了耶
1119
01:08:00,417 --> 01:08:01,452
还有那个秋梨髋
1120
01:08:01,583 --> 01:08:03,369
她都用捏的耶
1121
01:08:04,375 --> 01:08:05,581
大尾
1122
01:08:09,333 --> 01:08:11,745
我爱妳宝贝娜
1123
01:08:14,083 --> 01:08:16,039
我好委屈喔
1124
01:08:17,292 --> 01:08:18,407
抱抱…
1125
01:08:18,542 --> 01:08:19,531
抱抱
1126
01:08:32,500 --> 01:08:33,205
皮在痒啊你
1127
01:08:33,333 --> 01:08:34,823
不是她香水味让我
1128
01:08:35,542 --> 01:08:38,079
亲错了
1129
01:08:39,833 --> 01:08:40,743
喂
1130
01:08:41,583 --> 01:08:42,618
啥
1131
01:08:43,708 --> 01:08:45,699
金马奖
1132
01:08:45,833 --> 01:08:48,745
你跟他说我三金都不参加
1133
01:08:48,875 --> 01:08:49,660
不是…
1134
01:08:49,792 --> 01:08:51,157
喂
1135
01:08:52,458 --> 01:08:54,619
谁要找你去金马奖啦
1136
01:08:54,750 --> 01:08:55,409
不然是谁
1137
01:08:55,542 --> 01:08:58,409
是的 能够走上5○届金马奖的红地毯
1138
01:08:58,542 --> 01:09:00,328
所有的电影人在他们的工作岗位上
1139
01:09:00,458 --> 01:09:02,619
都是日以继夜奋战不懈
1140
01:09:02,750 --> 01:09:05,583
所以今晚他们都是电影圈的钢铁人
1141
01:09:06,042 --> 01:09:08,158
这一条短短的金马奖红地毯
1142
01:09:08,292 --> 01:09:11,659
是许多电影人梦寐以求的一段星光大道
1143
01:09:11,792 --> 01:09:13,578
但这段路不容易走
1144
01:09:13,708 --> 01:09:16,245
多少人走过来都是跌跌撞撞的
1145
01:09:16,375 --> 01:09:17,865
有人拿奖跟翻书一样
1146
01:09:18,000 --> 01:09:19,456
怎么拍都有
1147
01:09:19,583 --> 01:09:21,744
1148
01:09:21,875 --> 01:09:23,957
欢迎各位大导演回娘家
1149
01:09:24,667 --> 01:09:26,157
至于中间这位呢
1150
01:09:26,292 --> 01:09:27,498
怎么拍都没有
1151
01:09:27,625 --> 01:09:28,455
他义无反顾
1152
01:09:28,583 --> 01:09:30,039
不屈不挠地走在第一个
1153
01:09:30,167 --> 01:09:32,283
超帅的朱导
1154
01:09:35,417 --> 01:09:36,452
还有人曾经说过
1155
01:09:36,583 --> 01:09:37,993
不参加三金典礼
1156
01:09:38,125 --> 01:09:39,490
结果去了金钟奖
1157
01:09:39,625 --> 01:09:41,616
现在 还来到金马奖
1158
01:09:41,750 --> 01:09:42,910
很奇怪耶
1159
01:09:43,958 --> 01:09:45,949
尖叫声在哪里
1160
01:09:58,375 --> 01:09:59,660
我去把他引开
1161
01:09:59,792 --> 01:10:00,952
你去救小芹
1162
01:10:01,083 --> 01:10:02,414
在那边
1163
01:10:10,333 --> 01:10:12,244
人呢
1164
01:10:12,375 --> 01:10:13,080
你先
1165
01:10:13,208 --> 01:10:14,163
你先啊
1166
01:10:14,292 --> 01:10:16,078
老子又不是傻子
1167
01:10:16,208 --> 01:10:17,744
老子看起来就是棒槌吗
1168
01:10:17,875 --> 01:10:20,036
你一个人来就笨透了
1169
01:10:22,667 --> 01:10:24,407
林志伶怎么穿内裤
1170
01:10:25,042 --> 01:10:26,907
林志伶穿内裤
1171
01:10:27,458 --> 01:10:28,243
林志伶呢
1172
01:10:28,375 --> 01:10:29,239
在哪里
1173
01:10:29,458 --> 01:10:30,948
看没有林志伶啊
1174
01:10:31,083 --> 01:10:31,822
白痴啊
1175
01:10:31,958 --> 01:10:32,447
被骗了啦
1176
01:10:32,542 --> 01:10:33,031
追啊
1177
01:10:33,167 --> 01:10:34,532
快点啦…
1178
01:10:48,917 --> 01:10:49,702
奇怪了
1179
01:10:49,833 --> 01:10:50,367
分开找
1180
01:10:50,500 --> 01:10:51,580
你找那边
1181
01:10:51,708 --> 01:10:52,868
走
1182
01:12:23,333 --> 01:12:24,869
两次姿势都不一样
1183
01:12:25,000 --> 01:12:26,786
就是你 我…
1184
01:12:34,750 --> 01:12:35,455
小芹
1185
01:12:35,583 --> 01:12:36,493
妳怎么在这里
1186
01:12:36,625 --> 01:12:38,081
我一直在找妳耶
1187
01:12:38,875 --> 01:12:39,955
什么
1188
01:12:41,458 --> 01:12:42,117
我在这边…
1189
01:12:42,250 --> 01:12:43,410
好…嘘…
1190
01:12:45,000 --> 01:12:46,160
来…
1191
01:12:48,500 --> 01:12:50,206
好久没用了
1192
01:13:32,292 --> 01:13:34,999
你这个爱情的骗子
1193
01:13:39,625 --> 01:13:49,614
抗议…
1194
01:13:52,167 --> 01:13:53,156
你的帽子呢
1195
01:13:53,292 --> 01:13:54,577
*@*％#＠*&@！%
1196
01:13:55,292 --> 01:13:56,247
疯子
1197
01:14:00,542 --> 01:14:01,327
你有没有看到一个人
1198
01:14:01,458 --> 01:14:03,369
头发跟你一样 马桶盖
1199
01:14:03,500 --> 01:14:05,115
*@*％#＠%！？@
1200
01:14:05,708 --> 01:14:06,697
疯子
1201
01:14:15,542 --> 01:14:17,203
你面熟面熟喔
1202
01:14:17,333 --> 01:14:18,698
*@％#＊&@！%
1203
01:14:19,500 --> 01:14:20,535
疯子
1204
01:14:25,292 --> 01:14:26,031
请问一下喔
1205
01:14:26,167 --> 01:14:28,123
你咖啡要喝冰的 还是热的
1206
01:14:28,250 --> 01:14:28,989
冰的啦
1207
01:14:29,125 --> 01:14:30,160
冰的嘛
1208
01:14:31,125 --> 01:14:32,661
看你多会演
1209
01:14:33,417 --> 01:14:36,250
有人欺负我们族人啊
1210
01:14:48,708 --> 01:14:50,073
有够臭
1211
01:15:04,417 --> 01:15:05,156
不要啦
1212
01:15:05,292 --> 01:15:05,872
别这样啦
1213
01:15:06,000 --> 01:15:08,582
听爸爸的话没有错 是吧
1214
01:15:09,667 --> 01:15:11,328
夫妻的事情
1215
01:15:11,458 --> 01:15:12,914
床头打床尾和
1216
01:15:13,042 --> 01:15:14,122
还是夫妻啊
1217
01:15:14,250 --> 01:15:15,160
谁跟他是夫妻
1218
01:15:15,292 --> 01:15:16,953
我们又没有结婚
1219
01:15:22,000 --> 01:15:22,910
什么事啦
1220
01:15:23,042 --> 01:15:24,122
不要动手动脚
1221
01:15:24,250 --> 01:15:25,740
我真的有事情想要跟妳讲
1222
01:15:25,875 --> 01:15:27,240
原来你在这里喔
1223
01:15:27,375 --> 01:15:28,831
我找你找好久
1224
01:15:28,958 --> 01:15:30,038
你看…
1225
01:15:30,417 --> 01:15:31,657
戒指挑好了
1226
01:15:31,792 --> 01:15:33,157
喜不喜欢
1227
01:15:35,000 --> 01:15:36,285
小芹…
1228
01:15:37,542 --> 01:15:38,873
怎么从那里踢下去
1229
01:15:39,000 --> 01:15:40,615
如果不能生了怎么办
1230
01:15:40,750 --> 01:15:41,409
不是啦
1231
01:15:41,542 --> 01:15:43,203
这个戒指是…
1232
01:15:58,292 --> 01:15:58,781
准
1233
01:15:58,875 --> 01:16:00,160
接得准
1234
01:18:24,333 --> 01:18:25,368
幸好
1235
01:18:25,500 --> 01:18:27,582
连续下三天的雨
1236
01:18:28,333 --> 01:18:29,948
你们姊妹的功劳
1237
01:18:30,083 --> 01:18:31,539
不简单
1238
01:18:32,625 --> 01:18:35,241
不然我已经四天都干洗了
1239
01:18:35,375 --> 01:18:36,956
今天我要大洗
1240
01:18:37,083 --> 01:18:38,698
洗干净一点
1241
01:18:41,375 --> 01:18:42,831
谁按门铃
1242
01:18:54,708 --> 01:18:56,664
那个长腿哥又来了
1243
01:18:57,333 --> 01:18:59,540
谁要抢走我的小辣
1244
01:18:59,667 --> 01:19:01,498
除非踏过我的尸体
1245
01:19:01,625 --> 01:19:03,661
踏过我的尸体
1246
01:19:20,500 --> 01:19:23,037
他是在胡说八道什么我怎么听不懂
1247
01:19:23,167 --> 01:19:23,872
英文啦
1248
01:19:24,000 --> 01:19:25,410
英文喔
1249
01:20:07,167 --> 01:20:09,749
妳干嘛躲我
1250
01:20:10,958 --> 01:20:12,414
你明知道
1251
01:20:12,500 --> 01:20:14,206
我们不会有结果
1252
01:20:14,458 --> 01:20:15,197
好
1253
01:20:15,625 --> 01:20:16,660
那妳还我
1254
01:20:16,792 --> 01:20:17,656
嗯
1255
01:20:18,542 --> 01:20:20,999
把最重要的还给我
1256
01:20:22,167 --> 01:20:23,156
妳走了
1257
01:20:23,500 --> 01:20:24,865
也带走了
1258
01:20:25,958 --> 01:20:27,494
我的心
1259
01:20:28,417 --> 01:20:29,827
妳知道吗
1260
01:20:32,958 --> 01:20:33,913
看
1261
01:20:34,042 --> 01:20:35,703
又打头
1262
01:20:39,167 --> 01:20:44,457
天天…
1263
01:20:46,792 --> 01:20:50,205
〈相思好比小蚂蚁〉
1264
01:20:51,208 --> 01:20:54,996
〈爬啊爬在我心底〉
1265
01:21:23,583 --> 01:21:26,620
〈叫我好想你〉
1266
01:21:27,583 --> 01:21:28,789
天天
1267
01:21:29,500 --> 01:21:30,956
你醒啦
1268
01:21:32,167 --> 01:21:33,748
头还痛不痛
1269
01:21:33,875 --> 01:21:34,990
不痛了
1270
01:21:35,125 --> 01:21:37,116
有妳在就不痛了
1271
01:21:38,083 --> 01:21:39,289
最好是啦
1272
01:21:39,958 --> 01:21:41,494
一直都是
1273
01:21:45,292 --> 01:21:47,999
这个是妳妹妹男朋友喔
1274
01:21:48,583 --> 01:21:50,824
她眼光真好 交这种的
1275
01:21:50,958 --> 01:21:52,949
这种脚这么长的
1276
01:21:53,083 --> 01:21:54,493
在台湾交就有一堆
1277
01:21:54,625 --> 01:21:56,911
还要到香港去交 对吧
1278
01:21:57,042 --> 01:21:58,532
你自己是多长
1279
01:21:58,667 --> 01:21:59,156
没有
1280
01:21:59,250 --> 01:22:00,239
他比较长 我比较短
1281
01:22:00,375 --> 01:22:01,785
知道就好
1282
01:22:02,750 --> 01:22:04,866
妈妈走了啦
1283
01:22:05,958 --> 01:22:09,906
（爱情骗子启〉
1284
01:22:15,083 --> 01:22:16,118
小贺
1285
01:22:16,625 --> 01:22:18,206
我终于明白
1286
01:22:18,625 --> 01:22:21,788
爱你就是要把世界给你
1287
01:22:21,917 --> 01:22:23,498
把自由给你
1288
01:22:24,667 --> 01:22:27,033
我决定暂时离开
1289
01:22:27,167 --> 01:22:29,579
让我们彼此冷静一下
1290
01:22:30,333 --> 01:22:32,870
反正我们没有名份
1291
01:22:33,000 --> 01:22:35,491
你想怎么做都可以
1292
01:22:35,625 --> 01:22:37,115
如果要离开
1293
01:22:37,250 --> 01:22:39,115
家里有爸爸跟娜姐
1294
01:22:39,250 --> 01:22:41,206
你不用担心丑弟
1295
01:23:58,292 --> 01:23:59,372
小芹
1296
01:24:04,583 --> 01:24:05,322
妳听我说啦小芹
1297
01:24:05,458 --> 01:24:05,947
妳听我说
1298
01:24:06,042 --> 01:24:06,531
妳听我解释
1299
01:24:06,667 --> 01:24:08,157
喂停车
1300
01:24:10,458 --> 01:24:12,073
小贺
1301
01:24:42,375 --> 01:24:43,490
喂
1302
01:24:45,458 --> 01:24:47,414
喂 你醒一醒啊
1303
01:24:49,042 --> 01:24:52,159
不要闹了 你醒一醒啦
1304
01:24:53,958 --> 01:24:56,324
我说要你快乐
1305
01:24:57,083 --> 01:24:59,540
要你拥有全世界
1306
01:25:00,083 --> 01:25:04,497
我要给你自由 都不是要你变成这个样子
1307
01:25:06,875 --> 01:25:10,538
你不是跟我在一起不快乐吗
1308
01:25:10,667 --> 01:25:13,989
那你为什么还要来追我呢
1309
01:25:16,667 --> 01:25:18,328
你给我起来喔
1310
01:25:18,458 --> 01:25:20,039
你起来喔
1311
01:25:20,167 --> 01:25:23,284
你不要丢下我一个人
1312
01:25:26,958 --> 01:25:27,913
妳是谁啊
1313
01:25:28,958 --> 01:25:29,868
喔
1314
01:25:30,375 --> 01:25:32,912
他那天穿回来的那个三角裤就是妳的对不对
1315
01:25:33,042 --> 01:25:34,532
妳这个狐狸精
1316
01:25:34,667 --> 01:25:36,908
他是我老公
1317
01:25:37,042 --> 01:25:38,748
他是妳老公
1318
01:25:41,375 --> 01:25:43,240
不好意思她搞错了
1319
01:25:43,375 --> 01:25:44,990
我才是她老公
1320
01:25:53,167 --> 01:25:53,781
你这个
1321
01:25:53,917 --> 01:25:55,578
爱情的骗子
1322
01:25:59,083 --> 01:26:00,072
妳要去哪里啊
1323
01:26:00,208 --> 01:26:02,073
你到底要我怎样
1324
01:26:02,208 --> 01:26:03,448
我在的时候你不珍惜我
1325
01:26:03,583 --> 01:26:05,915
我要走的时候你又不让我走
1326
01:26:06,042 --> 01:26:07,157
事情不是妳想的那样
1327
01:26:07,292 --> 01:26:08,828
妳听我解释嘛
1328
01:26:08,958 --> 01:26:11,074
那个女的是我同父异母的妹妹
1329
01:26:11,208 --> 01:26:13,449
是我爸在外面偷生的啦
1330
01:26:14,083 --> 01:26:15,619
你当我白痴啊
1331
01:26:18,083 --> 01:26:21,246
那天我去墓园找我爸
1332
01:26:31,333 --> 01:26:33,574
有人那样子跟妹妹讲话的吗
1333
01:26:33,708 --> 01:26:35,369
小芹不是那种
1334
01:26:37,917 --> 01:26:41,614
这种前凸后翘的 小蛮腰 妖艳型的
1335
01:26:41,750 --> 01:26:42,239
她…
1336
01:26:42,333 --> 01:26:43,243
那是什么
1337
01:26:43,375 --> 01:26:46,367
她比较…娇小
1338
01:26:47,042 --> 01:26:48,248
她就是有点凶
1339
01:26:48,375 --> 01:26:49,535
挑礼服就挑礼服
1340
01:26:49,667 --> 01:26:51,282
干嘛帮她擦眼泪
1341
01:26:51,417 --> 01:26:54,989
小芹在我们家就好像带三个小孩一样
1342
01:26:55,125 --> 01:26:56,615
很辛苦
1343
01:26:56,750 --> 01:26:57,865
我觉得
1344
01:26:58,750 --> 01:27:00,456
我欠她一个婚礼
1345
01:27:01,792 --> 01:27:03,157
干嘛
1346
01:27:05,833 --> 01:27:07,289
就感动嘛
1347
01:27:13,458 --> 01:27:15,414
找了好久才找到的
1348
01:27:16,292 --> 01:27:17,702
他们说有一克拉
1349
01:27:17,833 --> 01:27:19,073
喜欢吗
1350
01:27:22,542 --> 01:27:24,498
关我什么事
1351
01:27:25,708 --> 01:27:26,914
什么关妳什么事
1352
01:27:27,042 --> 01:27:28,532
喜不喜欢啊
1353
01:27:30,625 --> 01:27:32,206
不喜欢丢掉啰
1354
01:27:34,583 --> 01:27:35,698
真的喔
1355
01:27:37,083 --> 01:27:37,742
丢了
1356
01:27:38,333 --> 01:27:40,949
少来了 在你手里啦
1357
01:27:43,292 --> 01:27:44,532
你真的丢了
1358
01:27:44,667 --> 01:27:46,203
不是不喜欢
1359
01:27:46,333 --> 01:27:47,618
你有病啊
1360
01:27:47,750 --> 01:27:50,116
那个一克拉耶
1361
01:28:07,500 --> 01:28:09,491
你放我下来啦
1362
01:28:09,625 --> 01:28:11,957
这辈子妳跟定我了
1363
01:28:12,083 --> 01:28:14,449
可是我行李还没拿耶
1364
01:28:20,583 --> 01:28:22,073
没想到妳的身材
1365
01:28:22,208 --> 01:28:23,823
还是跟二十年前一样
1366
01:28:23,958 --> 01:28:25,914
都这么好
1367
01:28:27,458 --> 01:28:29,449
谢谢妳为我做的礼服
1368
01:28:31,125 --> 01:28:33,457
谢谢妳一直在等我
1369
01:28:36,750 --> 01:28:38,035
新娘妳在这里喔
1370
01:28:38,708 --> 01:28:41,415
妳老公在那边等妳硬半天了
1371
01:28:42,167 --> 01:28:44,078
姊 妳看啦
1372
01:28:44,208 --> 01:28:45,072
你不要这样啦
1373
01:28:45,208 --> 01:28:46,869
好啦快去啦
1374
01:28:47,000 --> 01:28:47,489
好啦
1375
01:28:47,583 --> 01:28:48,493
我先走了
1376
01:28:53,208 --> 01:28:54,118
这是什么
1377
01:28:54,250 --> 01:28:55,740
你昨天不是送我了
1378
01:28:55,875 --> 01:28:58,332
这个啊
1379
01:28:58,958 --> 01:29:00,994
你已经有了 还买这个做什么
1380
01:29:01,125 --> 01:29:03,411
小芹妈妈的遗物啦
1381
01:29:04,250 --> 01:29:06,241
我跟妳说我很穷
1382
01:29:06,375 --> 01:29:07,865
穷得要被抓走
1383
01:29:08,000 --> 01:29:10,082
什么东西都卖掉了
1384
01:29:10,208 --> 01:29:12,950
只有这个戒指舍不得把它卖掉
1385
01:29:13,625 --> 01:29:14,489
这样很好啊
1386
01:29:14,625 --> 01:29:15,740
那你现在是在紧张什么
1387
01:29:15,875 --> 01:29:17,615
就是要把这个拿给她啊
1388
01:29:18,125 --> 01:29:20,081
就不知道为什么不敢拿给她
1389
01:29:20,208 --> 01:29:21,493
会紧张耶
1390
01:29:22,042 --> 01:29:23,873
我觉得我自己误会了自己
1391
01:29:24,000 --> 01:29:24,830
我以前很有胆
1392
01:29:24,958 --> 01:29:26,368
我在签牌签到
1393
01:29:26,500 --> 01:29:27,956
在等开奖我都不怕
1394
01:29:28,083 --> 01:29:29,289
为什么这次会怕
1395
01:29:29,417 --> 01:29:30,202
不然妳跟我一起去
1396
01:29:30,333 --> 01:29:31,163
妳跟我一起去
1397
01:29:31,292 --> 01:29:32,077
欸
1398
01:29:32,417 --> 01:29:33,748
你是老爸耶
1399
01:29:34,250 --> 01:29:36,662
自己的事情你要自己解决
1400
01:29:36,792 --> 01:29:38,783
你不是很大尾吗
1401
01:29:39,625 --> 01:29:41,707
快去啦小芹在等你啦
1402
01:29:41,833 --> 01:29:44,165
我是怕我现在拿给她
1403
01:29:44,292 --> 01:29:45,998
看到这只戒指
1404
01:29:46,500 --> 01:29:48,741
她又想到她的妈妈又开始伤心
1405
01:29:48,875 --> 01:29:50,866
她今天当新娘
1406
01:29:52,708 --> 01:29:54,539
你不要担心好不好
1407
01:29:54,667 --> 01:29:57,409
对小芹来说你就是最好的爸爸
1408
01:29:57,542 --> 01:30:00,784
她如果看到这戒指一定会很开心的
1409
01:30:00,917 --> 01:30:04,455
我觉得你应该要亲手帮她戴上
1410
01:30:05,833 --> 01:30:08,245
对
1411
01:30:13,125 --> 01:30:14,456
很感谢妳
1412
01:30:14,958 --> 01:30:16,323
我开这间民宿
1413
01:30:16,458 --> 01:30:17,573
从头到尾
1414
01:30:17,708 --> 01:30:19,244
都是妳在帮忙
1415
01:30:19,667 --> 01:30:21,999
妳连抱怨辛苦都没有
1416
01:30:23,083 --> 01:30:25,699
我们这个做好的时候
1417
01:30:25,833 --> 01:30:27,494
婚事都办好了
1418
01:30:27,917 --> 01:30:29,657
我会给妳一个交代
1419
01:30:29,792 --> 01:30:31,748
我会让妳有一个家
1420
01:30:41,208 --> 01:30:41,947
爸
1421
01:30:43,583 --> 01:30:44,823
我今天美不美
1422
01:30:44,958 --> 01:30:45,572
美
1423
01:30:45,708 --> 01:30:46,663
漂亮
1424
01:30:47,917 --> 01:30:50,909
两个眼睛就像妳妈妈那么漂亮
1425
01:30:52,625 --> 01:30:54,832
今天妳结婚 爸爸很高兴
1426
01:30:55,500 --> 01:30:57,866
爸爸有一句话应该要对妳说
1427
01:30:59,333 --> 01:31:01,119
爸爸很失败
1428
01:31:01,583 --> 01:31:03,869
妳妈妈走的时候妳还小
1429
01:31:04,417 --> 01:31:07,375
我要当妈妈还要当爸爸
1430
01:31:07,958 --> 01:31:10,449
两个角色我都做不好
1431
01:31:10,583 --> 01:31:11,698
真对不起妳
1432
01:31:12,958 --> 01:31:13,993
爸
1433
01:31:15,417 --> 01:31:17,032
爸爸决定
1434
01:31:21,167 --> 01:31:23,909
把这个重要东西 交给妳
1435
01:31:33,208 --> 01:31:34,664
这是妳妈妈
1436
01:31:37,208 --> 01:31:38,448
嫁给我
1437
01:31:39,833 --> 01:31:41,289
唯一的嫁妆
1438
01:31:46,875 --> 01:31:47,830
不可以哭
1439
01:31:48,500 --> 01:31:50,331
妳哭了不行
1440
01:31:50,458 --> 01:31:51,948
妳今天当新娘
1441
01:31:52,083 --> 01:31:53,539
哭起来会不好看
1442
01:32:00,750 --> 01:32:01,865
爸
1443
01:32:03,208 --> 01:32:05,073
就算我嫁人
1444
01:32:05,500 --> 01:32:06,910
我都不会跟你分开
1445
01:32:07,042 --> 01:32:09,249
爸爸也不想跟妳分开啊
1446
01:32:09,375 --> 01:32:11,741
是妳住在妳老公那里
1447
01:32:12,375 --> 01:32:14,832
我永远还是妳老爸
1448
01:32:34,042 --> 01:32:35,578
真厉害
1449
01:32:36,167 --> 01:32:37,122
真厉害
1450
01:32:37,250 --> 01:32:38,865
那还不简单啊
1451
01:32:39,000 --> 01:32:40,991
你还真勇健
1452
01:32:43,042 --> 01:32:44,282
晃成这样喔
1453
01:32:45,458 --> 01:32:46,368
老辣妹
1454
01:32:46,500 --> 01:32:48,161
妳长得酷毙了
1455
01:32:48,750 --> 01:32:49,489
真的喔
1456
01:32:49,625 --> 01:32:50,535
真的啊
1457
01:32:51,042 --> 01:32:53,954
长得太残酷了 该拖出去枪毙
1458
01:32:54,083 --> 01:32:55,118
酷毙
1459
01:32:56,000 --> 01:32:57,456
看你娘咧
1460
01:33:09,083 --> 01:33:10,619
这个喝下去是很好的东西
1461
01:33:10,750 --> 01:33:13,162
妳喝下去 好像在…
1462
01:33:13,958 --> 01:33:15,994
开直升机也不是这样
1463
01:33:22,542 --> 01:33:23,622
去你全家
1464
01:33:23,750 --> 01:33:25,581
你妈的咧
1465
01:33:25,708 --> 01:33:26,868
撞死你全家三代
1466
01:33:27,000 --> 01:33:28,115
什么人这么该死
1467
01:33:28,250 --> 01:33:30,992
拿酱油 酱油拿来给人喝
1468
01:33:31,125 --> 01:33:31,989
好啊…你！
1469
01:33:32,125 --> 01:33:32,659
我操
1470
01:33:32,792 --> 01:33:33,702
连你五姨一起操
1471
01:33:33,833 --> 01:33:35,039
你闪一边
1472
01:33:35,167 --> 01:33:36,907
夭寿死小孩
1473
01:33:37,042 --> 01:33:37,531
短命鬼
1474
01:33:37,625 --> 01:33:38,410
什么人
1475
01:34:12,542 --> 01:34:14,783
这是什么
1476
01:34:14,917 --> 01:34:16,202
现在穿这个
1477
01:34:16,333 --> 01:34:17,743
不会觉得太迟了吗
1478
01:34:17,875 --> 01:34:18,364
拜托
1479
01:34:18,458 --> 01:34:21,291
这是早上刚刚从美国空运来台的
1480
01:34:21,417 --> 01:34:25,456
FBI最新研发的RU786
1481
01:34:25,583 --> 01:34:26,663
很坚固的
1482
01:34:26,792 --> 01:34:27,998
没用啦
1483
01:34:28,125 --> 01:34:29,990
每个人都被老子插过了
1484
01:34:30,125 --> 01:34:31,706
大家都破功了啦
1485
01:34:31,833 --> 01:34:32,697
什么破功…
1486
01:34:32,833 --> 01:34:33,948
小奇大
1487
01:34:34,083 --> 01:34:34,572
恭喜啊
1488
01:34:34,708 --> 01:34:35,697
恭喜
1489
01:34:35,833 --> 01:34:37,369
他是来参加我们婚礼的
1490
01:34:37,500 --> 01:34:39,240
现在都是一家人了
1491
01:34:39,375 --> 01:34:40,330
一笑泯恩仇
1492
01:34:40,458 --> 01:34:41,368
泯恩仇
1493
01:34:41,500 --> 01:34:43,206
什么一笑泯恩仇…
1494
01:34:43,333 --> 01:34:44,322
好…
1495
01:34:44,458 --> 01:34:45,197
笑
1496
01:34:45,583 --> 01:34:46,072
笑
1497
01:34:46,167 --> 01:34:46,781
我老婆说的
1498
01:34:46,917 --> 01:34:48,748
懂得笑就不会有仇恨
1499
01:34:48,875 --> 01:34:50,206
对不对
1500
01:34:51,000 --> 01:34:52,285
各位兄弟
1501
01:34:53,333 --> 01:34:56,370
我大尾鲈鳗今天要宣布一件事情
1502
01:34:57,083 --> 01:34:59,199
我要退出江湖
1503
01:34:59,333 --> 01:35:00,869
不理世事
1504
01:35:01,000 --> 01:35:03,241
专心疼我的老婆
1505
01:35:04,375 --> 01:35:06,661
我这个地位换谁来接
1506
01:35:06,792 --> 01:35:10,785
由我老大 奇大的儿子
1507
01:35:10,917 --> 01:35:12,373
小奇大
1508
01:35:16,083 --> 01:35:17,323
我成功了
1509
01:35:17,833 --> 01:35:19,289
真的假的啦
1510
01:35:20,167 --> 01:35:21,202
要笑
1511
01:35:22,083 --> 01:35:23,243
要笑
1512
01:35:27,208 --> 01:35:28,664
来唷笑一个
1513
01:35:28,792 --> 01:35:31,534
女婿新娘照一张
1514
01:35:35,917 --> 01:35:36,451
好
1515
01:35:38,375 --> 01:35:39,160
好
1516
01:35:39,750 --> 01:35:40,455
来
1517
01:35:40,833 --> 01:35:42,744
伴娘跟伴郎来
1518
01:35:45,792 --> 01:35:46,998
一 二
1519
01:35:48,250 --> 01:35:51,117
现在换台客帮的 都靠过来
1520
01:35:51,250 --> 01:35:52,410
台客帮就是
1521
01:35:52,542 --> 01:35:55,249
就是身上有刺字的都靠过来
1522
01:35:56,375 --> 01:35:59,117
对…
1523
01:35:59,250 --> 01:36:00,035
来
1524
01:36:00,875 --> 01:36:02,786
一二照
1525
01:36:04,917 --> 01:36:06,623
怎么都跑光光了
1526
01:36:07,333 --> 01:36:13,078
现在以前跟新娘子有一腿的客兄都过来
1527
01:36:20,833 --> 01:36:22,448
不要怀疑啦妳忘记了喔
1528
01:36:22,583 --> 01:36:24,574
我们两个的内裤还穿错耶
1529
01:36:24,958 --> 01:36:25,993
你来
1530
01:36:28,000 --> 01:36:29,160
交给你啰
1531
01:36:36,583 --> 01:36:37,572
谢谢…
1532
01:36:37,708 --> 01:36:38,618
好来
1533
01:36:39,000 --> 01:36:43,699
现在跟新郎有睡过床的人都站出来
1534
01:36:54,917 --> 01:36:55,747
怎么这么老啊
1535
01:36:55,875 --> 01:36:56,455
看
1536
01:36:57,083 --> 01:36:58,072
你说什么
1537
01:36:58,208 --> 01:36:58,867
谁老
1538
01:36:59,000 --> 01:37:00,581
你都不会老 死了不会臭吗
1539
01:37:00,708 --> 01:37:01,197
好了…
1540
01:37:01,292 --> 01:37:02,407
去你的
1541
01:37:02,542 --> 01:37:03,827
我操
1542
01:37:04,250 --> 01:37:06,491
老母…
1543
01:37:07,208 --> 01:37:08,573
我他妈啦
1544
01:37:09,625 --> 01:37:11,832
他跟我睡大的 吃我的这颗…
1545
01:38:48,375 --> 01:38:49,410
说
1546
01:38:50,083 --> 01:38:52,369
在我之前你睡过几个女人
1547
01:38:53,167 --> 01:38:56,079
我发誓 我真的只睡过妳一个
1548
01:38:57,833 --> 01:38:58,913
骗人
1549
01:38:59,625 --> 01:39:02,913
因为其他的我整晚都没睡
1550
01:39:06,625 --> 01:39:09,583
我告诉你什么人都不可以欺负我女儿
92577
