Original subtitles

.

[Andreya Triana's "Heart in My Hands"]

[laughter]

- ♪ In between the nightmares and the dreams ♪

- Char!

- ♪ Well I barely spoke

♪ What's stuck in my throat - Char?

- ♪ The angels of heaven

- A lot of parents of adopted kids tell them,

"You weren't born in my belly. You were born in my heart."

♪

I tried that on Charlotte once,

and she looked at me like I was crazy.

That girl knows more about hearts

than a 14-year-old should.

One, two, three...

- ♪ Tender

- Charlotte! - Four.

As a doctor,

I pray for her heart to be fixed.

But as a mother, I pray for it to heal.

- Mom's doing that thing again where she says

she's not worried a million times to cover

for how worried she actually is about my heart thing.

- Of course she's worried, Char,

you collapsed in front of us.

Are you sure you don't want any of this?

- Is a good? - Really, really--no.

- This is stress eating because you're meeting the Calhouns.

- I'm canceling the Calhouns.

- Um, no, you're not.

- You're having surgery tomorrow, Char.

- Exactly! Tomorrow. The Calhouns are today.

You have to go meet the people who raised you for two months

and hear about all the cute baby things you did.

- It doesn't seem like the right time.

- Oh, I get it.

You're chicken and using me as an excuse.

- I am not!

God, Char, you're right.

I am.

- Hi, Dr. Pena. Robin Perry.

- Nice to put a face to the voice

on the phone, Dr. Perry.

- Today, I'm just Charlotte's mom,

who is so grateful you were able to get on a plane

and come down here so fast.

- Dr. Pena is the head of cardiothoracic surgery at GW,

and she specializes in Charlotte's condition.

- In other words, we're in the presence

of a cardio goddess. - Well, I'm flattered.

Now, I've reviewed Charlotte's scans--

- So have I, and Dr. Tate said that it looks like her heart

has outgrown the original repair

she had when she was five?

- You took the words out of my mouth.

- We know that kids with Tetralogy of Fallot

usually need another repair surgery when they get older.

- Yeah, we just didn't think she was symptomatic yet.

- Sometimes an event like the one

she experienced yesterday

is the first sign of pulmonary regurgitation.

Now, I read in her chart

that she had her first surgery nearly nine years ago?

- That's right. She's, uh, she's a miracle.

- I'll take good care of your miracle.

- ♪ Well, I don't want to tell you how ♪

♪ How to love when you want to ♪

- Hey, I'm here to hold down the fort

while Robin looks after Char.

- Just making some food for tomorrow,

when we'll all be waiting around at the hospital.

Whoa, what you got going on there, pal?

- I'm packing for the hospital tomorrow.

So far, I have my crayons, my Mad Libs,

my small dragon, my medium-size Dragon,

and a flashlight.

I need AA batteries.

- JJ, Charlotte's surgery is only gonna take a few hours.

- They tell you it's only gonna take a few hours,

then pretty soon, you're living there.

This isn't my first rodeo, Larry.

[cell phone rings]

- Hey, Luly. Is, uh, is Charlotte okay?

Charlotte's okay.

So, what's goin' on?

- Jackson just texted, "Yo, how's Charlotte?"

He low-key loves you.

- He--he's not my type. - I can see you with Lucas.

- Gross. [text chime]

- Patrick? - [laughs]

- I like Patrick.

- No, um, I'm laughing at this meme Freya sent me.

It's a cat in a taco costume.

She's obsessed with cats in costumes.

- Oh, by the way, my dad says there's this cream you can

put on your scar after surgery that'll help it go away.

- But Freya thinks scars are cool.

- Um, could you please tell me

every other random thing about Freya,

because it's really fascinating.

Does she like Jell-O? How about shoe laces?

- Are you jealous of Freya?

- No, but it's like-- why am I even here?

You should go hang out with her if you're so into her.

- Te--Tess. [wheezes]

I can't--I can't breathe.

- Help, somebody! It's okay, somebody's coming.

- Get them on the cardiac monitor.

- Somebody check the pupils.

- One amp of epi. - Someone find her mom.

All right, let's get her on some oxygen, please.

- Let's go ahead and increase...

- Charlotte, this is Dr. Tate.

Nice, slow, deep breath. Slow, deep breaths.

[dramatic music]

♪

- Hey!

My car broke down,

and Evan's in Atlanta for this government homeowners seminar.

- You headin' to the hospital? - No, I just came from there.

I'm going to Pooler.

- What's in Pooler? - The Calhouns.

- Oh, you're meetin' them. - Yeah.

- Why didn't you tell me?

- I didn't want to say anything before

in case I chickened out.

Which I'm about to do, so can you take me?

- Uh, yeah.

- Have you felt dizzy like this before yesterday?

- Yeah. A little. - What?

- I just didn't wanna worry you.

- Love, it's your job to worry me.

- Your heart is currently and what we call A-fib,

which stands for atrial fibrillation.

Basically, it just means your heart is skipping some beats.

- She's on meds to control that.

- Is she breaking through?

- Charlotte, honey, you rest up, okay?

I'm gonna talk to these guys outside.

- I'll be right back. Love you.

- Look, I don't wanna scare her,

but her worsening symptoms,

coupled with the fact she's not responding to meds,

put her at risk for heart failure.

- So what do we do?

- We operate today.

- Today, today?

- Preserving her heart function is my main priority,

and with the rate of atrial enlargement, frankly,

I worry about sudden cardiac arrest.

- I take her for her yearly checkups.

- This is no one's fault, just the nature of her condition.

I think a deliberately aggressive approach is best.

- It's happening really fast. [sniffles]

Now I know how my patients feel when they're about to deliver,

and they tell me they're not ready.

- And?

What do you tell him?

- I tell them, "Better get ready,

because this is happening whether you like it or not."

.

- What happens after you open up my chest?

- A bypass machine takes over,

so your heart can take a little break.

- A--a break?

Like my heart's gonna stop beating?

Like I'll be dead?

- No, the whole point is to keep you very much alive.

- But my heart stops beating.

- Let's not worry about all those details.

Leave those up to me.

- Details help ease her worry, actually.

My girl likes to be in the know.

- Okay.

Yes, your heart stops beating while we fix it.

- Can I take dad with me into the O.R.?

- Your dad?

- The kids take turns hanging out with their dad's ashes.

Which sounds way creepier than I thought it would.

- We keep the O.R. sterile. Kids ask all the time

if they can bring in their favorite animal

or Transformer, and I've gotta tell you what I tell them:

Dad's gotta wait for you outside the O.R.

- Hang on.

Char's not asking for a stuffed animal or a Transformer.

All she's asking for is a little control.

- I'm sorry, but it's not an option.

- Listen, my daughter spent

the first five years of her life in an orphanage

with a baby-to-caregiver ratio of 10-to-1,

so she would cry, and no one would come,

and she learned that she was alone.

And when we adopted her, we had to teach her

to give up some of that control and to trust us,

but control is still an issue with her,

and I'm asking you to reconsider.

The ashes could go in a sterile bag.

There would be no added risk.

[somber music]

Thank you.

♪

- Okay.

This is it.

That's him.

Are you coming?

- Only if you need me to.

- I think I need you to.

- Hello! Look at you.

All grown up.

You probably guessed, I'm Will, and I'm a hugger.

- Yes. [chuckles]

- Please, come on in.

- Anthony Lavelle. We've met before.

- Yes, in court, during the custody case.

I remember.

Hey, come on.

- Oh, you have a beautiful house.

- Charlotte thinks the ashes are in JJ's room.

- Yeah, JJ's looking, but no luck so far.

I tried Theo's.

- Have you tried Char's closet?

- Um...

Yeah. No, they're not in here.

- This is a sign that we need to figure out what to do

with Scotty's ashes, once and for all.

Larry, the way these kids take turns with 'em,

they're gonna lose 'em. - You know what?

Let me put the phone down for a minute so I can really look.

Hope will entertain you.

- Hi, sweet girl! It's mama!

Hey, listen, I have to spend the day at the hospital, okay?

So, I need you to take it easy on Larry.

And, um, would you also please

take care of your brother, JJ?

This is really scary for him.

- Found it! Behind the pillow,

in the corner, just where you'd expect it.

- Great, okay. Thank you, Larry. Really.

Oh, hold on, I've gotta go. That's my mom.

[phone beeps]

- Oh, my goodness.

You, you have a really amazing mama, you know that?

- Tess? I got your text. - You don't have to whisper.

I told you I'm the only one in here.

- Okay, um, any chance we could move this conversation

out of the ladies' room? - No.

My face is puffy from crying.

I picked a fight with Charlotte,

and her heart, like, exploded, or whatever.

- Oh, baby, I'm sorry you two got into a fight,

but it isn't your fault.

It's just time.

And when it's time, it's time.

- Maybe it's time for me to get a new best friend.

She doesn't need me anymore.

She's got cool friends now, like Freya.

- Charlotte loves you.

But it sounds like she's branching out a little.

That's normal.

You've gotta give her room to grow.

And give yourself permission to grow, too.

Okay, not to get all metaphorical,

but Char's heart is failing because it needs to expand,

and there's no room.

Everything needs room to grow, baby, even best friends.

- Wanna hear my metaphorical response?

- Sure.

[toilet flushes]

- Mom. I brought dad.

- Hey, love, thank you for coming.

Have you heard from Luly?

- Yeah, Larry said her car broke down,

so Anthony went to go get her.

- Well, thank goodness for Anthony.

Uh, Char is getting prepped for surgery,

but I'll tell her that you're here.

- How is she? - She's great.

Yeah, she's fine.

Surgery is the most routine thing in the world.

It's gonna be fine.

- Well, I'm convinced.

- Really, she's fine.

I'm gonna go take dad to the scrub nurse.

Jules, you take care of him, okay?

Being back here isn't easy on us.

♪

Emily is gonna be your scrub nurse,

and she's gonna bring dad's urn into the O.R.,

and Dr. Tate is gonna be there, too,

so you are gonna be surrounded by people

who know you and who care about you.

And I wish I could be in there with you, too, Char-Char.

- It's okay, mom.

Dad has my back.

- He does.

- ♪ I've been holding my breath ♪

♪ I've been counting to ten

♪ Over something you said

- Okay.

This is where we leave you, parents.

- You remember when you were little,

and I would drop you off at school,

and you never wanted to let go of my hand?

I'm feeling that way right now.

But you remember what I used to say to you?

"I will see you so soon, love."

- ♪ So tell me to leave

♪ I'll pack my bags, get on the road ♪

♪ Find someone that loves you better ♪

♪ Than I do, darling, I know ♪

♪ 'Cause you remind me every day ♪

♪ I'm not enough, but I still stay ♪

- ♪ Feels like a lifetime

♪ Just tryna get by while we're dying inside ♪

- I wanna run after her, Ollie.

- I know, but you can't.

- I know.

- ♪ Why we stay the same

- We're going to get started now.

- Could you count down from ten for me?

- Ten, nine,

eight, seven,

six, five, four...

- ♪ 'Cause I keep finding all the ways ♪

- Three...

- ♪ So I can stay

- Three what, Charlotte?

- D--Dad?

- Yeah.

Three what?

♪

- Three yellow butterflies.

- Remember these flash cards,

from when you were learning English?

What's this one?

♪

- Two green leaves.

Are you really here?

- This one was your favorite.

Do you remember what you'd do with this one?

- I'd say "one red heart," and...

Put my hand here.

♪

And you'd say...

both: "Can you feel my heart?"

- Can you?

- Yeah.

♪

- I was hoping you could. - You're really here.

- I think I am.

.

- Opening the pericardium.

- Vitals are good.

[gentle music]

♪

- So, how's mom?

- She's good. She misses you.

- I hope she's not moping around the house

staring at my photo.

- She's not. - She's not?

- No, I mean, sometimes she is.

- I'm just teasing.

I may have died, but I didn't lose my sense of humor.

- Oh, Luly got married to Evan.

- Oh, the skinny architect.

- They bought a house,

and Theo got caught drinking,

and JJ is good, and Hope's almost walking.

- Wait, wait, wait. Theo drinking?

Where was the Council when this was happening?

- They're there.

They're helping. It's just been hard.

And we're--we're doing the best we can.

- Are you?

You haven't been completely honest with mom

about your heart.

You've been feeling dizzy for a while now,

and you didn't say anything.

- I thought it was stress.

I mean, it's really stressful to have your dad die

the same year you're starting high school.

- I know.

- And as if being the adopted Chinese girl with a dead dad

didn't make me enough of a freak,

now I'm the girl with the bad heart,

and the scar on her chest.

- Scars are cool. - You sound like Freya.

- Who's Freya?

- She's a--she's a friend from band.

She's like, "If I had a scar, I'd flaunt it."

- I think I like Freya. - This isn't about her.

It's about me.

I--I can't wear a bikini.

- Since when are you a bikini person?

I don't think I've ever seen you wear one.

- What if I did? Would that be okay,

or would I suddenly not fit this idea you had of me?

- Are we arguing about bikinis?

- Everyone thinks they know me, and they don't!

- So tell me. Tell me what I don't know.

- What for? You're not really here.

- Where are you going?

- Home.

- Thanks for saying yes to this.

- Absolutely.

- I wanna say, straight off the top,

Luly lost her dad, eight months ago.

She's been going through a lot.

- I understand. Regina and I are sorry for your loss.

The last thing I wanna do is add to your pain.

I want this to be healing. For all of us.

- Is your wife joining us? - No, no.

This is really hard for her.

She--we lost a child, when you left our home.

- I'm so sorry. - It wasn't your fault.

I just say that so that you know that you were loved.

But we had to keep going, and so we did.

Adopted two more kids. Different as could be.

They're great.

One is a nose-to-the-grindstone type,

and the other was born to be on the red carpet.

We call him Hollywood.

- Oh, this is Hollywood. - That's Hollywood.

- Oh, yeah.

- But I wanna know all about you.

- What do you wanna know? - Double or triple shot?

And do I really need to be caffeinating my anxiety?

- Where is Anthony? I thought he was bringing food.

- He's with Luly,

and neither one of them are getting back to me.

- Oh, Peter wants to be here, but he's still sick.

- I know, he keeps texting me. He's such a love.

I'm really glad you guys are workin' it out.

[phone chimes]

Oh, that's the O.R. Char's on bypass.

Oh, Ollie, I'm scared.

Distract me.

- Um, okay, uh, let's jog in place.

Come on.

- Distract me more? - Uh, okay.

Um, Peter and I are thinking about adopting another kid.

- What? - Keep jogging.

- Oh, people are staring. - Oh, hey, Jerry!

Just letting off a little steam.

Keep pushing.

- Back to your baby. - Not a baby yet.

It's the idea of a baby. And it is your fault.

You know, this council made us realize

there's a lot more support around us than we realized,

and, you know, babies are pretty tough.

- Another baby! - Again, the idea of a baby.

- I love your idea of a baby.

- I just, I worry I can't love anybody as much as I love Tess.

- Tess is pretty ideal. You have love to spare.

- Okay, okay, truth?

Just you and me, joggin' in the break room?

- Uh-huh.

- Do you have a favorite?

- Well, they're all my favorite.

- Huh.

- Okay.

Luly was always Scott's baby, and Theo is an island.

Theo belongs to no one. JJ is everyone's favorite.

Hope, um, saved my life.

But Char is mine.

She's my baby. I can't lose her.

- You are not gonna lose her. You hear me?

- Yeah.

- Okay, let's, uh, let's do another round. Come on.

Got another lap to go. - Okay.

[knock on door]

- Charlotte, can I come in?

- No, I'm fine. Just leave me alone.

- I'm sorry I died, and then you feel like

I don't know you, and that's kinda true, right?

I mean, you're probably changing so much.

So, tell me about you.

- I can't. - You can tell me anything.

Perk of having a dead dad, I can't tell anyone.

Not even mom.

- I'm scared to say it.

- Do you remember when you started school?

You were so shy.

So scared to go to school

because you didn't speak English.

Then, at the end of the year,

when we went to the school assembly,

there's our shy little girl, up on stage,

playing "Simple Gifts" perfectly

in front of the whole school.

- It's an easy song.

[ukulele plays]

- You're braver than you know.

♪

- You're playing it wrong.

- It's not easy for everyone.

You're special.

- I don't wanna be special. I just wanna be normal.

I'm not like you. I'm not that brave.

- I can see all the things about you that are so great,

but you can't see them right now.

Let me show you. Come with me.

- So, I went to Vanderbilt. - Mm, Nashville.

What did you major in?

- English. - Wow.

English is Regina's thing. Always was a math guy, myself.

So, what's next? Grad school?

Become a professor or something?

- Maybe. - Luly's being modest.

She is a brilliant writer.

- Oh. Toni Morrison, you like her writing?

- "Song of Solomon" is one of my favorite books.

- Regina's is "Blue Eyes."

[phone chiming]

Um, I've been corrected. "The Bluest Eye."

Told you, I'm a math guy.

[phone chimes]

- Is somebody else here?

- Um, she--she didn't want you to know.

She wanted to be close. Hear your voice.

- Regina? She's here?

- Regina, for heaven's sake.

Honey, come on out. Sweetheart?

[somber music]

♪

- I'm sorry.

Didn't think I could handle seeing you all grown up.

I still haven't forgiven you.

- Ma'am, if we can talk in private.

Luly, she doesn't have to get dragged into--

- All these years, everyone says to let it go,

but I can't.

You owe us an apology.

- An apology for what?

♪

.

- Theo's Find My Phone

says that he's here, but he's not here.

I don't see him. Do you see him?

I see Tess. I don't see Theo.

And Luly's not getting back to me.

And the O.R. hasn't sent anymore updates.

And I'm officially losing my mind.

Tess, this is what a grown-up

looks like when she's losing her mind.

- I don't think I ever told Charlotte that I love her.

- Hey, she knows, Ollie. - She's responsible for Tess.

I mean, we saw how great she was,

so we decided to adopt Tess.

- Hey, Tess, sweetheart, I know you and Char had a fight.

She loves you. And I love you.

- You know how much I love you, right?

- Yes.

- And I love Charlotte.

And they should be updating us more.

I mean, how hard is it to update?

- Right, you've got, like, a million orderlies.

Just send one out.

- I mean, I always give updates.

- Because it's rude not to.

- Yeah, irresponsible and rude, frankly.

- Me and--

- Charlotte would kill me if I didn't film this.

- Really?

- Don't post that.

- I'm scared.

- There's no rush.

We'll go in whenever you're ready.

- Is Charlotte gonna die?

Is that why everybody's being stressed?

- No, Charlotte's gonna be fine.

JJ, look at me.

- Sometimes adults don't tell kids the truth.

They think we won't understand.

- Well, I'm tellin' you the truth.

- Okay. Let's do this.

- ♪ Throw me a rope

♪ Oh, I keep fallen down

- I think I just hate this hospital is what I'm realizing.

I don't know if I can go back inside.

- I get that.

My mom killed herself

in the downstairs playroom at my house.

Like, where my old Barbie mansions are.

I couldn't go in there for years

because it felt cursed, or something.

And then, one day, my guitar teacher was like,

"We should play in here.

It's got great acoustics," or whatever.

It was gonna to be too awkward to be like,

"No, that's where I found my mom's dead body."

So, I went in there with my teacher, and I learned guitar.

And now I love that room.

I think about my mom all the time when I'm in there,

and not the dead version of her, but the alive version.

Dancing and singing while I utterly shred

"House of the Rising Sun."

A place only has the power that you give it.

I think my mom would really love you.

I really love you.

- I really love you, too.

I don't know what I'd do if you weren't here.

- ♪ Just can't get enough, no, I ♪

♪ Oh, I feel you in my bones

♪ Just can't get enough, no, I ♪

♪ Oh, I feel you in my bones

- Things got ugly. The lawyers, court.

I chose to stand by my best friend,

but the hurt that it caused you folks,

I'm truly sorry.

- Loyalty is one thing. Lying is another.

- What are you talking about?

- We challenged your father's custody case.

At the time, he was an active alcoholic.

Unfit.

- I know he struggled early on with sobriety,

but what does that have to do with Anthony?

- She doesn't know, Will. They kept it from her.

- Kept what from me?

- I was your dad's character witness.

So when the judge asked me if your dad was sober...

I lied.

I said he'd been clean for months.

That wasn't true.

- And if you'd told the truth,

then I would've been raised by these guys.

- Maybe.

- My life is built on a lie.

- No, no, no, your life turned out fine.

Your dad's getting sober was a prayer answered.

- At the time, I didn't wanna believe it was a lie.

I wanted to believe it was the right thing to do.

And that, obviously, is debatable,

but it happened, and you deserve to know that.

I'm sorry.

I know I can never make that right.

♪

- You just did.

.

- Thank you for taking me in as a baby

and for welcoming me now.

- This home is always open to you.

- I'm not surprised you're a writer.

I always dreamed of passing this book on to you.

- Thank you.

♪

Thank you.

- Mm.

♪

- You lied to a judge!

You lied to them, the sweetest people on the planet!

- Yeah, I lied. - In court.

- And I'd do it again. I am sorry that it hurt them.

I'm sorry it hurt you, but I'm not sorry I did it.

I'm not.

- It's just a lot a lot, Anthony.

It's a lot to process,

and the fact that I didn't know that.

You didn't tell me that part! When I asked for the truth,

it comes out in dribs and drabs, and in my head,

I'm thinking, what else are you not telling me?

Is there something else that I should know?

[phone buzzes]

[sighs]

Oh, my God. Charlotte's in surgery.

[machinery beeping]

♪

- Let's take her off bypass.

- The first time we were up on this platform,

you were too scared to jump.

- I'm still scared.

- But you're a different girl now.

You're stronger, wiser, older.

Take the leap, wear the bikini. Don't hold back.

You're the girl with the ukulele.

- But what if-- - What if what?

When your mom called to tell me that she met this sick

little girl that she wanted to adopt,

I had all the what-ifs,

but when I went to the hospital,

and I saw you, do you know you did?

- I smiled at you. - That's right.

You showed me who you were.

There it is. There's that smile.

That smile that could conquer anything.

- I'm still scared.

- But you gotta do it, anyway.

[uplifting music]

♪

[splash]

- Why is the doctor taking so long to come out?

- Because it takes time to fix a heart.

Why is it taking so long for the doctor to come out?

- Because it takes time to fix a heart.

- Luly, can we talk?

- And say what? I need to move on?

I know that.

I can't keep feeling sorry for myself.

I've got a great family, a great husband,

and I need to focus on the good things in my life.

- Can you forgive me?

- Probably. But I need time.

- Of course.

- And I need to focus on Charlotte right now.

Positive thoughts.

- I'll leave you alone.

♪

- I miss this.

This view, the smell of the water.

It always brought me peace.

When things get hard, you come down here,

because nothing's impossible

when you're lookin' out at that.

♪

You're gonna get through this.

Let people in.

Let them meet the real you.

You're loved. You're so loved.

♪

Be open to it. It's full of surprises.

- Please don't go, Dad.

- I'm here, Char-Char.

I'm always here.

Remember, one red heart.

♪

- One red heart.

Can you feel it?

♪

- The little guy is gonna be relieved when this is over.

He thinks the hospital is a place to come and people die.

It'll be good for him to see a happy outcome.

- It'll be good for all of us. - Mm.

- Blue team to ICU. Blue team, ICU.

♪

- She did great.

- [chuckles]

- She did great, you guys. - Oh.

[uplifting music]

[relieved chatter]

♪

- Oh. - Thank you.

♪

.

[gentle music]

♪

- Hey.

You did so good.

Doctor said the surgery went perfectly.

I'm so proud of you.

I'm not even gonna cry all over you this time.

- Dad misses the water.

- Okay.

♪

- I got you something. - What is it?

- Open it, dummy.

Freya was right.

You should be proud of your scar, and flaunt it.

- This is really flaunting it.

- I can take it back if you--

- No, no, I love it. Seriously.

- I feel so bad about the fight we had.

- No, I--I feel bad.

- I was holding you back. You can have other friends.

Other friends are cool.

I'm gonna make other friends, so you better watch out,

'cause I'm gonna get so many friends,

you're gonna be jealous.

- We can have other friends,

but you're my best friend.

- Really?

- Yeah.

And, because you're my best friend,

I should've trusted you to tell you something big.

- Okay. - But I'm scared.

- Is it about Freya?

- No.

It's about me.

♪

We're here to say goodbye to Dad.

But before we do, I want him to know who I am.

I want you all to know who I am.

♪

I'm a Perry. I love the water.

The way it sounds, the way it smells,

and the way it calms me.

I'm Chinese.

I was born there and contain the hidden history

of my first five years.

I have birth parents there,

and I thank them for having the courage

to give me up so I could heal.

I'm a girl. With a weird heart.

But it's less weird now that it's been fixed.

But I wouldn't trade its weirdness

because it led me here, to you.

To Dad. To the water!

And...

To finding the courage to tell you

that I'm also a person who, if I ever fall in love,

like the kind of love mom and dad had,

it will be with a girl.

- ♪ You're broken down and tired ♪

♪ Of living life on a merry-go-round ♪

♪ And you can't find a fighter ♪

- Well, we love you exactly as you are.

- Good.

I don't want this to be all about me,

so can we not, like, all hug this out?

- Sure, sure, sure. - I'm sorry,

but a guy who was closeted till his mid-20's,

I'm gonna need a hug. Come here.

- ♪ And I'll rise up

♪ I'll rise like the day, I'll rise up ♪

- I love you. - I love you, too.

- ♪ I'll rise up

♪ And I'll do it a thousand times again ♪

♪ And I'll rise up

- Now I'm ready to say good-bye.

- ♪ High like the waves, I'll rise up ♪

♪ In spite of the ache I'll rise up ♪

♪ And I'll do it a thousand times again ♪

♪ For you

- I did it, Dad.

I showed them.

- Hey, Dad.

I joined the football team. For, like, a second.

- Hey, Dad. This is for me and Hope.

She's really cute. And I'm okay.

- Over these past months,

I learned new things about you.

The real you. More than I imagined.

- I talk to you every night. Hope you can hear me.

- And I'm in love. Her name is Jules.

And I think you'd really like her.

- I really miss you,

and I wish that you could talk to me about it.

- Thank you for letting me be me.

- ♪ And I'll rise up

- I--I really miss you.

- I miss you so much.

- ♪ I'll rise unafraid, I'll rise up ♪

- Okay. Bye.

- ♪ And I'll do it a thousand times again ♪

♪ For you

- Thanks for taking care of Charlotte, love.

I am not gonna say goodbye to you,

because you are not gone.

You are in the kids, and you are in the council,

and you're in my heart.

Love, you're always in my heart.

- ♪ And we'll rise up, high like the waves ♪

- How do you heal a broken heart?

The first step is to realize the heart's a strong muscle.

It wants to keep going. So, let it.

Let it heal. Let it forgive.

Let it love and be loved.

That's what it does best. Try it.

♪