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1
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God damn it!
2
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- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
3
00:00:40,233 --> 00:00:42,767
So do me a favor and wake him up a bit.
4
00:00:42,802 --> 00:00:44,002
Huh?
5
00:00:44,037 --> 00:00:45,737
Just, it's on him now,
6
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so I need you to surprise him
7
00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:49,541
because he's, he's too controlled now.
8
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- Okay.
- Do you mind?
9
00:00:51,144 --> 00:00:53,444
No. Totally, I, I think I got it.
10
00:00:53,479 --> 00:00:54,678
- All right, good.
- Okay.
11
00:00:54,713 --> 00:00:56,147
Okay, last looks, please.
12
00:00:56,182 --> 00:00:59,517
So... it's the big
turning point now, right?
13
00:00:59,552 --> 00:01:00,717
- Yeah, yeah.
- Right?
14
00:01:00,753 --> 00:01:02,986
This is on you, this is real close.
15
00:01:03,022 --> 00:01:04,622
We want to see this
thing hit you, right?
16
00:01:04,657 --> 00:01:05,756
Yeah, I got it.
17
00:01:05,791 --> 00:01:08,059
And, and... the feeling.
18
00:01:08,094 --> 00:01:09,126
- Right.
- Mm-hmm.
19
00:01:09,162 --> 00:01:11,995
- Hey, uh...
- Thanks, Kunta.
20
00:01:12,031 --> 00:01:15,231
Are you, uh, above this?
Because I want to...
21
00:01:15,267 --> 00:01:16,733
You're tight. You're tight.
22
00:01:16,769 --> 00:01:17,737
All right, all right.
23
00:01:17,846 --> 00:01:20,256
- All right, finishing up.
- Here we go.
24
00:01:21,540 --> 00:01:24,207
All right, and let's roll sound, please.
25
00:01:24,242 --> 00:01:25,442
Rolling, rolling.
26
00:01:25,477 --> 00:01:26,709
Quiet, please.
27
00:01:26,744 --> 00:01:28,578
Sound speed. Marker.
28
00:01:28,613 --> 00:01:30,346
Uh... Cameras are set.
29
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:31,914
Action.
30
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So I'm really sorry.
31
00:01:34,752 --> 00:01:36,119
There's nothing I can do.
32
00:01:36,154 --> 00:01:38,654
You lost custody of Maggie.
33
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Oh, my God, Maggie.
34
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Yeah.
35
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You're never gonna see her again,
36
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and it's all your fault.
37
00:01:49,366 --> 00:01:50,332
What?
38
00:01:50,367 --> 00:01:51,601
Cut!
39
00:01:51,636 --> 00:01:53,168
Why did you say that? That's...
40
00:01:53,204 --> 00:01:54,648
- Sorry.
- That's, that's not in the script.
41
00:01:54,672 --> 00:01:56,016
- Sorry.
- That's not in the script.
42
00:01:56,040 --> 00:01:57,272
That felt... That felt weird.
43
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Big man, that was... That was amazing.
44
00:01:58,943 --> 00:02:00,709
- Yeah?
- It's a great, great day.
45
00:02:01,812 --> 00:02:02,911
It's a great, great day.
46
00:02:02,946 --> 00:02:04,679
You're doing... Yeah. Oh, yeah.
47
00:02:04,715 --> 00:02:06,681
- Oh, okay.
- Right.
48
00:02:07,985 --> 00:02:09,618
Thank you.
49
00:02:12,823 --> 00:02:13,888
Hey.
50
00:02:13,924 --> 00:02:15,056
Hey.
51
00:02:15,092 --> 00:02:16,290
How are you holding up?
52
00:02:16,326 --> 00:02:19,227
I'm all right. You know, it's, uh,
53
00:02:19,262 --> 00:02:21,496
- this is work, but, uh,
- Yeah.
54
00:02:21,531 --> 00:02:23,464
I'm blessed to be working.
55
00:02:23,500 --> 00:02:24,666
That is right.
56
00:02:24,701 --> 00:02:26,134
I just want to say
57
00:02:26,653 --> 00:02:27,885
I'm a fan from way back.
58
00:02:27,921 --> 00:02:30,155
- I mean, you are great.
- Oh, no, no.
59
00:02:30,190 --> 00:02:31,323
You are so...
60
00:02:31,358 --> 00:02:33,290
You don't have to
say that, Mel, but I do.
61
00:02:33,326 --> 00:02:34,826
I love your movies.
62
00:02:34,861 --> 00:02:38,329
Well, I used to, too,
when they were my movies.
63
00:02:38,364 --> 00:02:39,831
I know, but you're great,
64
00:02:39,866 --> 00:02:42,399
and it's an honor to be
working with you, really.
65
00:02:42,435 --> 00:02:43,935
Oh, thanks, Sammy.
66
00:02:43,970 --> 00:02:46,270
Well, then it's only fair to tell you
67
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that my brother and I used to say
68
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"Oh, stop it" all the time.
69
00:02:52,296 --> 00:02:53,688
Oh, my God, that's a nightmare.
70
00:02:53,712 --> 00:02:54,945
No, no. Seriously,
71
00:02:54,980 --> 00:02:55,780
that show killed us.
72
00:02:55,814 --> 00:02:57,348
And when you did the sad episodes,
73
00:02:57,383 --> 00:02:59,150
we'd both pretend not to be crying.
74
00:02:59,185 --> 00:03:00,384
Aw.
75
00:03:00,419 --> 00:03:01,985
Yeah, the sad shows were the best.
76
00:03:02,021 --> 00:03:04,555
I don't need you. I don't need anybody.
77
00:03:05,991 --> 00:03:07,824
Well,
78
00:03:07,860 --> 00:03:09,926
not to jerk each other off too much,
79
00:03:09,962 --> 00:03:13,630
but Move Down is my Bible.
80
00:03:13,666 --> 00:03:16,700
And it formed me.
81
00:03:16,735 --> 00:03:19,002
- Really?
- Yeah. It did.
82
00:03:19,038 --> 00:03:20,937
A little bit. It did a little bit.
83
00:03:20,973 --> 00:03:23,306
Well, that's... That's all right.
84
00:03:23,341 --> 00:03:24,641
Melly Mel!
85
00:03:24,676 --> 00:03:27,009
Mel, I found these, uh,
Tibetan prayer beads
86
00:03:27,045 --> 00:03:29,078
over at, uh, props,
and I-I want to wear them.
87
00:03:29,113 --> 00:03:30,558
Teak's, uh, Teak's going to wear these.
88
00:03:30,582 --> 00:03:31,981
I know it doesn't match,
89
00:03:32,016 --> 00:03:33,727
- but continuity's for pussies, right?
- Uh...
90
00:03:33,751 --> 00:03:35,818
So Teak's a Buddhist
now. Right? It's cool.
91
00:03:35,853 --> 00:03:37,720
- Or Hindu.
- Prayer-prayer beads?
92
00:03:37,755 --> 00:03:39,188
Yeah.
93
00:03:39,223 --> 00:03:41,023
He's...
94
00:03:45,797 --> 00:03:49,464
Well... we used to
both do our own thing,
95
00:03:49,500 --> 00:03:51,901
and, uh, now we're doing his thing.
96
00:03:51,936 --> 00:03:55,171
Yeah, but it's good to work
with good people, though,
97
00:03:55,206 --> 00:03:56,538
along the way.
98
00:03:56,574 --> 00:03:59,575
Well, that's what keeps me going.
99
00:03:59,610 --> 00:04:01,176
You doing okay?
100
00:04:01,212 --> 00:04:02,844
Yeah. I mean,
101
00:04:02,879 --> 00:04:04,646
it's hard for me being out here.
102
00:04:04,682 --> 00:04:07,949
I mean, I-I need
my-my home comforts
103
00:04:07,984 --> 00:04:09,818
and, uh...
104
00:04:09,853 --> 00:04:11,687
living in a hotel for a month,
105
00:04:11,722 --> 00:04:13,221
you know, gets old, but, uh,
106
00:04:13,256 --> 00:04:15,289
Yeah, of course it does.
107
00:04:15,325 --> 00:04:16,691
I'm whining.
108
00:04:16,727 --> 00:04:19,794
No, no. Everybody needs to be home.
109
00:04:19,830 --> 00:04:21,750
You should come to my house for dinner.
110
00:04:21,868 --> 00:04:23,776
Come have dinner with me and my girls.
111
00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:25,600
And my mom. Just be
112
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with a family for a
night. You could have
113
00:04:27,204 --> 00:04:30,238
some home-cooked food or
some home-ordered takeout.
114
00:04:30,273 --> 00:04:31,872
Come on, Mel, we're bros.
115
00:04:31,907 --> 00:04:33,006
Seriously?
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Because, I mean, I mean,
I'm-I'm tempted.
117
00:04:35,478 --> 00:04:36,910
Yeah, you want to come tomorrow?
118
00:04:36,946 --> 00:04:38,812
Um, I could swing tomorrow.
119
00:04:38,848 --> 00:04:40,314
Good. You're coming.
120
00:04:42,017 --> 00:04:43,284
Tomorrow.
121
00:04:43,319 --> 00:04:44,918
You bet.
122
00:04:44,954 --> 00:04:47,554
Wait. I'm sorry. Was that Mel Trueblood?
123
00:04:47,589 --> 00:04:49,556
Yeah.
124
00:04:49,591 --> 00:04:51,424
Are you having dirty with Mel Trueblood?
125
00:04:51,460 --> 00:04:53,093
Oh, my God, I love your life.
126
00:04:53,129 --> 00:04:55,796
You love what you pretend my life is.
127
00:04:55,831 --> 00:04:57,765
And no, we're not doing
any dirty things.
128
00:04:57,800 --> 00:04:59,366
You are. You totally are.
129
00:04:59,401 --> 00:05:00,834
How would I not tell you?
130
00:05:00,870 --> 00:05:02,636
On what planet am I not telling you?
131
00:05:02,671 --> 00:05:04,537
Okay, so you're hoping.
132
00:05:04,573 --> 00:05:05,772
No.
133
00:05:05,807 --> 00:05:07,907
No, he's a nice guy.
134
00:05:07,942 --> 00:05:11,244
And, uh, he's also a genius.
135
00:05:13,915 --> 00:05:16,516
Sunny, stop. That's gross.
136
00:05:16,551 --> 00:05:19,152
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm
sorry for being gross.
137
00:05:20,288 --> 00:05:21,520
Yeah. I mean,
138
00:05:21,555 --> 00:05:24,290
he's cute, he's sexy.
139
00:05:24,325 --> 00:05:26,659
And I'm pretty sure he's married.
140
00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:28,928
Let's find out.
141
00:05:28,963 --> 00:05:30,797
What are you doing? Don't.
142
00:05:30,832 --> 00:05:32,832
I'm googling your genius new boyfriend.
143
00:05:32,867 --> 00:05:34,733
No, no. Not while you're driving.
144
00:05:34,769 --> 00:05:36,302
We're gonna get into an accident.
145
00:05:36,337 --> 00:05:37,803
- I hate this!
- Dummy...
146
00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:40,105
- This is nervous...
- A Tesla.
147
00:05:40,140 --> 00:05:41,139
It drives itself.
148
00:05:41,175 --> 00:05:44,677
Can you please put
your hands on the wheel?
149
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:46,945
This gives me a terrible
feeling in my stomach.
150
00:05:46,980 --> 00:05:48,011
I hate it.
151
00:05:48,131 --> 00:05:49,493
Aw, man, he's wicked married.
152
00:05:49,517 --> 00:05:50,783
Okay, good.
153
00:05:50,818 --> 00:05:52,750
Now you driving and not
the robot doing it.
154
00:05:52,786 --> 00:05:54,252
- Thank you.
- Okay.
155
00:05:55,889 --> 00:05:57,722
Do you have to go right home?
156
00:05:57,757 --> 00:05:59,457
Yeah, honey. I don't want to go out.
157
00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,993
No, just come over for a little bit.
158
00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:03,728
Fine.
159
00:06:07,483 --> 00:06:09,392
You know, you still
could sleep with him.
160
00:06:09,393 --> 00:06:10,506
Who?
161
00:06:10,541 --> 00:06:12,841
Mr. Mo' Money Farouk back there.
162
00:06:14,011 --> 00:06:15,076
No.
163
00:06:15,112 --> 00:06:17,578
You just have to promise
to tell me if you do.
164
00:06:18,615 --> 00:06:20,248
You promise to tell me if you do.
165
00:06:20,283 --> 00:06:22,450
Pinky swear right now
before we go into the house.
166
00:06:22,486 --> 00:06:24,052
I'm not gonna do it. He's married.
167
00:06:24,087 --> 00:06:26,154
- Uh-huh.
- Will you make me a lemon drop?
168
00:06:26,189 --> 00:06:27,588
Totally.
169
00:06:27,624 --> 00:06:30,024
Hey, Sammy.
170
00:06:30,059 --> 00:06:32,292
Hi, Jeff.
171
00:06:33,029 --> 00:06:34,161
Hey, hon.
172
00:06:34,196 --> 00:06:37,965
Hey, baby. Your I, uh,
deal keeps making noise.
173
00:06:38,001 --> 00:06:39,667
Yeah, I know.
174
00:06:39,702 --> 00:06:42,102
Can you look at it like I asked you?
175
00:06:42,138 --> 00:06:43,804
All my stuff is broken.
176
00:06:43,840 --> 00:06:44,906
Oh, Jesus, I'm so tired.
177
00:06:44,941 --> 00:06:46,407
You know what, though? Later, maybe.
178
00:06:46,442 --> 00:06:51,311
So are you wasted right now?
179
00:06:51,347 --> 00:06:52,913
Okay, eat shit.
180
00:06:52,948 --> 00:06:53,947
Kidding.
181
00:06:53,982 --> 00:06:56,517
You know, but eat you some shit, though.
182
00:06:56,552 --> 00:06:58,152
Right?
183
00:07:00,256 --> 00:07:02,056
What?
184
00:07:02,091 --> 00:07:04,257
Baby!
185
00:07:06,528 --> 00:07:08,962
Eh, women, huh?
186
00:07:08,997 --> 00:07:11,330
Yeah.
187
00:07:11,366 --> 00:07:12,532
- Right?
- Mm-hmm.
188
00:07:12,568 --> 00:07:14,367
Seriously, though,
189
00:07:14,402 --> 00:07:16,169
she's often a psycho.
190
00:07:16,204 --> 00:07:17,303
Right, Sam?
191
00:07:17,338 --> 00:07:19,105
Yeah.
192
00:07:19,140 --> 00:07:21,107
I mean...
193
00:07:21,142 --> 00:07:22,486
I don't want to preach to the choir.
194
00:07:22,510 --> 00:07:24,277
No, totally. I get it.
195
00:07:24,312 --> 00:07:25,545
You're awesome, Sammy.
196
00:07:25,580 --> 00:07:27,080
Yeah.
197
00:07:27,115 --> 00:07:28,714
Hey, seriously, for a second, though,
198
00:07:28,749 --> 00:07:30,950
like, what would she do without me?
199
00:07:30,985 --> 00:07:31,817
You know?
200
00:07:31,852 --> 00:07:33,786
Or you, for that matter.
201
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:36,722
I mean, I know I don't have to tell you.
202
00:07:36,757 --> 00:07:38,591
It's like you
know... You know her forever.
203
00:07:38,626 --> 00:07:40,459
You guys go, like, way back.
204
00:07:40,494 --> 00:07:43,261
Yeah. We go way, way back.
205
00:07:43,297 --> 00:07:45,731
You know this.
206
00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:48,634
My dad and I got in a fight, and, uh,
207
00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:49,780
he kicked me out of the house,
208
00:07:49,804 --> 00:07:51,770
and I was so scared,
209
00:07:51,806 --> 00:07:54,973
and she took me in,
and she got me a job.
210
00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:55,974
Whoa.
211
00:07:56,009 --> 00:07:57,576
Yeah, she was
212
00:07:57,611 --> 00:08:00,612
19, she was already
taking care of people.
213
00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:02,481
She was amazing.
214
00:08:02,516 --> 00:08:03,648
She was full of confidence.
215
00:08:03,683 --> 00:08:05,750
She was so beautiful.
216
00:08:05,785 --> 00:08:09,988
I mean, I never knew anybody
who had so much potential.
217
00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:13,625
And then she met you, Jeff.
218
00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:15,292
Jesus, did she love you.
219
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,527
Yeah.
220
00:08:16,562 --> 00:08:18,429
And here's Sunny...
221
00:08:18,464 --> 00:08:20,564
All right, this woman who
222
00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,500
loves so hard and she tries so hard,
223
00:08:22,535 --> 00:08:25,036
and she just ends up
224
00:08:25,071 --> 00:08:28,071
pouring all of that love
into you for years.
225
00:08:28,107 --> 00:08:30,941
Jeff, do you know what that's like
226
00:08:30,976 --> 00:08:33,644
to watch your friend, someone you love,
227
00:08:33,679 --> 00:08:35,779
someone who is like a goddess
228
00:08:35,814 --> 00:08:38,449
with the power to fly to the moon
229
00:08:38,484 --> 00:08:40,851
and shine a light on the world,
230
00:08:40,886 --> 00:08:43,820
and she ends up using all of that power
231
00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:46,690
just to keep her fat, shit,
232
00:08:46,725 --> 00:08:48,925
useless, boring
233
00:08:48,961 --> 00:08:51,662
stoner husband barely afloat?
234
00:08:51,697 --> 00:08:53,997
It's just a shame, Jeff.
235
00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:57,567
Well, here's the thing.
236
00:08:57,602 --> 00:09:00,903
I know that you have...
237
00:09:00,938 --> 00:09:04,374
sucked your share of dicks, huh?
238
00:09:04,409 --> 00:09:06,876
I've heard about you.
239
00:09:06,911 --> 00:09:08,611
That's okay, buddy. Don't bother.
240
00:09:08,647 --> 00:09:10,180
I don't care what you know.
241
00:09:10,215 --> 00:09:12,848
Okay, well, here's the thing.
242
00:09:12,884 --> 00:09:14,850
I'm gonna have to say
that I cannot believe
243
00:09:14,886 --> 00:09:18,453
that you just said all of that to me.
244
00:09:18,489 --> 00:09:20,990
Jesus, I'm offended.
245
00:09:21,025 --> 00:09:22,858
Serious.
246
00:09:22,894 --> 00:09:24,160
Don't worry about it.
247
00:09:24,195 --> 00:09:25,394
You won't remember.
248
00:09:25,429 --> 00:09:26,729
You know why I know that?
249
00:09:26,764 --> 00:09:28,798
Because I said all of this to you
250
00:09:28,833 --> 00:09:31,667
five years ago, and you don't remember
251
00:09:31,702 --> 00:09:34,503
because you've smoked
10,000 joints since then,
252
00:09:34,538 --> 00:09:37,872
so... good night, Jeff.
253
00:09:37,908 --> 00:09:40,309
See you at the next thing.
254
00:09:43,714 --> 00:09:45,914
All right, good night, Sammy.
255
00:09:49,116 --> 00:09:51,423
Hello. I'm home.
256
00:09:51,425 --> 00:09:54,349
Mama, you're home. I missed you.
257
00:09:54,385 --> 00:09:55,384
Hi.
258
00:09:55,420 --> 00:09:57,386
- Oh!
- Where were you?
259
00:09:57,422 --> 00:09:59,021
Mommy had to work today, remember?
260
00:09:59,056 --> 00:10:00,456
- Hi, Mom.
- I told you.
261
00:10:00,491 --> 00:10:02,757
Hey, come meet our guest!
262
00:10:02,793 --> 00:10:04,726
Mel, this is Max,
263
00:10:04,761 --> 00:10:07,195
and this little one I'm holding is Duke.
264
00:10:07,231 --> 00:10:08,297
She's very small.
265
00:10:08,332 --> 00:10:10,198
- Hiya, Duke.
- Hi.
266
00:10:10,234 --> 00:10:11,066
Sam?
267
00:10:11,101 --> 00:10:13,568
Oh, this is my sitter Lauren.
268
00:10:13,603 --> 00:10:14,702
It's Mel.
269
00:10:14,738 --> 00:10:16,571
Can I talk to you?
270
00:10:16,606 --> 00:10:18,740
Yeah. What's up?
271
00:10:18,775 --> 00:10:20,219
It's just getting
really difficult the way
272
00:10:20,243 --> 00:10:21,976
your girls talk to me
when you're not here,
273
00:10:22,011 --> 00:10:24,256
- and I just think that they should
learn some respect, - Oh, okay.
274
00:10:24,280 --> 00:10:26,091
- And I don't know anything about...
- Okay, I have
275
00:10:26,115 --> 00:10:28,182
to cook good dinner,
and so thanks for coming.
276
00:10:28,217 --> 00:10:30,151
I love you. Bye.
277
00:10:30,186 --> 00:10:31,218
Frankie, come here.
278
00:10:31,254 --> 00:10:33,988
Mel, this is Frankie.
279
00:10:34,023 --> 00:10:35,589
Hi.
280
00:10:35,624 --> 00:10:37,291
Hi.
281
00:10:37,327 --> 00:10:38,926
Hi.
282
00:10:38,962 --> 00:10:40,094
Hi.
283
00:10:40,129 --> 00:10:41,195
Oh.
284
00:10:41,230 --> 00:10:42,496
Hi.
285
00:10:42,531 --> 00:10:43,564
- Hi.
- Hi.
286
00:10:43,599 --> 00:10:45,066
Hi.
287
00:10:45,101 --> 00:10:46,200
Hi.
288
00:10:46,235 --> 00:10:47,501
Wait, one more hi.
289
00:10:47,536 --> 00:10:48,569
Hi.
290
00:10:48,604 --> 00:10:49,681
Oh, then I got to do this again
291
00:10:49,705 --> 00:10:51,772
to make it even. Hi.
292
00:10:54,810 --> 00:10:59,012
Put on pants.
293
00:11:00,983 --> 00:11:01,882
What?
294
00:11:01,917 --> 00:11:04,184
Are you gonna marry him?
295
00:11:04,219 --> 00:11:05,285
Hey, Duke?
296
00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,488
You need to learn how to whisper.
297
00:11:07,523 --> 00:11:10,690
Wait, so you're, like, an
actor in the movie Mom's in?
298
00:11:10,725 --> 00:11:11,958
No, I'm the director.
299
00:11:11,994 --> 00:11:13,360
- Hello!
- Oh.
300
00:11:13,395 --> 00:11:14,127
There's my mom.
301
00:11:14,162 --> 00:11:15,561
You're about to meet my mother.
302
00:11:15,597 --> 00:11:17,330
Hi, Mom.
303
00:11:17,366 --> 00:11:19,232
Hello, sweetheart.
304
00:11:19,267 --> 00:11:20,433
Mom, this is Mel.
305
00:11:20,469 --> 00:11:22,602
Mel, this is my mother Phyllis.
306
00:11:22,637 --> 00:11:25,337
- Oh. Hello.
- Oh, hello, Mrs. Fox.
307
00:11:25,373 --> 00:11:26,739
It's very nice to meet you.
308
00:11:26,774 --> 00:11:27,940
Yes, well.
309
00:11:28,429 --> 00:11:30,195
Mom, did you take our phone book?
310
00:11:30,230 --> 00:11:31,574
Because I noticed all the neighbors
311
00:11:31,598 --> 00:11:32,842
- have their phone books.
- No, no.
312
00:11:32,866 --> 00:11:34,010
Why would I take your phone book?
313
00:11:34,034 --> 00:11:35,100
I took my phone book,
314
00:11:35,135 --> 00:11:36,212
which was left at your step.
315
00:11:36,236 --> 00:11:37,744
No, that's mine.
316
00:11:37,918 --> 00:11:39,515
I always ask for two phone books,
317
00:11:39,539 --> 00:11:40,605
and they only brought one,
318
00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:42,474
so the one at your step must be mine.
319
00:11:42,509 --> 00:11:43,541
Mom!
320
00:11:43,577 --> 00:11:45,610
I learned a piano song, come listen.
321
00:11:48,014 --> 00:11:50,147
Come with me to the kitchen.
322
00:11:50,183 --> 00:11:52,951
Okay, off you go.
323
00:11:59,892 --> 00:12:02,293
I know this one.
324
00:12:02,328 --> 00:12:05,062
Um, did you not tell your mother
325
00:12:05,098 --> 00:12:06,541
that you were bringing home a black man?
326
00:12:06,565 --> 00:12:09,333
What? Oh, no. Of course not.
327
00:12:09,369 --> 00:12:10,468
That's not... No.
328
00:12:10,503 --> 00:12:11,969
- I mean...
- What? No!
329
00:12:12,005 --> 00:12:13,337
You should've told her.
330
00:12:13,373 --> 00:12:14,405
No, no, no, no, no.
331
00:12:14,440 --> 00:12:15,817
I'm telling you, that's not a thing.
332
00:12:15,841 --> 00:12:18,809
My mother is just insane.
She makes people feel weird.
333
00:12:18,844 --> 00:12:19,877
It's like her hobby.
334
00:12:19,912 --> 00:12:20,978
No, Sam.
335
00:12:21,013 --> 00:12:22,846
She's over 70, okay?
336
00:12:22,882 --> 00:12:25,749
You warn her that a black
man's coming over,
337
00:12:25,784 --> 00:12:27,618
even if it's to fix the cable box.
338
00:12:27,653 --> 00:12:29,887
Oh, my God. I'm telling you,
339
00:12:29,922 --> 00:12:31,154
My mother is not like that.
340
00:12:31,189 --> 00:12:32,989
She marched for integration.
341
00:12:33,025 --> 00:12:34,190
It doesn't matter, okay?
342
00:12:34,226 --> 00:12:35,892
I'm not calling your mother racist.
343
00:12:35,927 --> 00:12:37,660
I'm calling her over 70.
344
00:12:37,695 --> 00:12:41,331
You tell an old white lady
ahead of time, okay?
345
00:12:41,366 --> 00:12:43,566
You warn her. It's the right thing to do
346
00:12:43,601 --> 00:12:46,336
for the old lady and
the black guy coming over.
347
00:12:46,371 --> 00:12:49,438
Okay. No. I think you're wrong.
348
00:12:49,473 --> 00:12:51,206
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm hearing you,
349
00:12:51,242 --> 00:12:53,676
and I know you feel certain of this,
350
00:12:53,711 --> 00:12:57,146
but I think that this is your thing.
351
00:12:57,181 --> 00:13:00,750
That's not real. It's not.
352
00:13:00,785 --> 00:13:02,317
Oh, yeah, we don't have a mezuzah.
353
00:13:02,353 --> 00:13:03,597
- What's up with that?
- We're not that.
354
00:13:03,621 --> 00:13:05,387
- Yeah.
- Mm-mm! One time,
355
00:13:05,423 --> 00:13:07,056
Max was going to dance class,
356
00:13:07,091 --> 00:13:09,224
and she had this awful stomach virus.
357
00:13:09,260 --> 00:13:11,771
- Frankie, don't tell that story.
- It was like a dress rehearsal
358
00:13:11,795 --> 00:13:13,628
- for a dance concert.
- Right.
359
00:13:13,664 --> 00:13:15,264
And she was wearing this white leotard.
360
00:13:15,299 --> 00:13:17,399
- Okay, stop it.
- Frankie?
361
00:13:17,435 --> 00:13:18,412
- Stop.
- No, let her tell it.
362
00:13:18,436 --> 00:13:19,535
- Come on. What?!
- Mm-mm.
363
00:13:19,570 --> 00:13:22,270
So she misses the, the dress rehearsal.
364
00:13:22,305 --> 00:13:24,839
She's gonna be dropped
out of the concert.
365
00:13:24,875 --> 00:13:26,274
- Mm-hmm.
- Mom!
366
00:13:26,309 --> 00:13:27,520
But she has this stomach virus...
367
00:13:27,544 --> 00:13:28,788
Frankie, you can't tell this story
368
00:13:28,812 --> 00:13:30,979
- 'cause we're eating.
- Oh, come on. Mom...
369
00:13:31,014 --> 00:13:32,547
No! Shut up!
370
00:13:32,583 --> 00:13:33,815
Frankie, you're stopping.
371
00:13:33,850 --> 00:13:35,283
Fine. Fine. Fine.
372
00:13:35,318 --> 00:13:36,429
- Thank you.
- Okay, I'm done.
373
00:13:36,453 --> 00:13:37,985
- You're welcome.
- I'm done.
374
00:13:40,623 --> 00:13:42,468
And then, right in the middle
of doing a big split,
375
00:13:42,492 --> 00:13:43,702
brown poop squirted out of her butt
376
00:13:43,726 --> 00:13:45,259
all over the perfect white leotard!
377
00:13:46,696 --> 00:13:47,895
Mom!
378
00:13:50,900 --> 00:13:52,533
Sorry, Mel.
379
00:13:52,569 --> 00:13:55,302
We like that kind of humor at dinner.
380
00:13:55,337 --> 00:13:57,137
Oh, no, no, no. It's-it's fine.
381
00:13:57,172 --> 00:13:58,338
What are you doing?
382
00:13:58,373 --> 00:14:00,140
Are you, uh, still studying dance?
383
00:14:00,175 --> 00:14:01,541
I do this thing.
384
00:14:01,577 --> 00:14:02,710
It's-it's a modern class.
385
00:14:02,745 --> 00:14:04,778
It's based on this thing
called Alvin Ailey.
386
00:14:04,814 --> 00:14:05,646
I don't know if...
387
00:14:05,681 --> 00:14:07,948
Sure, I-I-I studied
there, actually.
388
00:14:07,984 --> 00:14:09,382
You did?
389
00:14:09,418 --> 00:14:11,351
Yeah, in New York
when I was in high school.
390
00:14:11,386 --> 00:14:13,653
That's great that you're doing that.
391
00:14:13,688 --> 00:14:15,388
Even if you don't dance, which,
392
00:14:15,424 --> 00:14:17,290
you know, I gave it up when I was 19,
393
00:14:17,326 --> 00:14:19,092
but you'll never regret it.
394
00:14:19,128 --> 00:14:20,860
I mean, it's still a part of me.
395
00:14:20,895 --> 00:14:22,295
Yeah?
396
00:14:22,331 --> 00:14:23,997
Thanks.
397
00:14:24,032 --> 00:14:25,520
No, you're lucky,
398
00:14:25,522 --> 00:14:27,712
because when I was your age and
I was aching to be an artist,
399
00:14:27,736 --> 00:14:30,136
I had to explain that to my parents.
400
00:14:30,171 --> 00:14:32,005
My father was a janitor.
401
00:14:32,040 --> 00:14:34,273
My mom's still a nurse.
402
00:14:34,308 --> 00:14:36,709
But they didn't know from art.
403
00:14:36,745 --> 00:14:40,079
You're lucky because
your mother is an artist.
404
00:14:40,115 --> 00:14:41,881
Well, she's not, like, an artist.
405
00:14:41,916 --> 00:14:45,451
Yes, she is. She's, like, an artist.
406
00:14:45,486 --> 00:14:47,386
Well, thank you, Mel.
407
00:14:47,421 --> 00:14:49,288
That's very nice of you, Mel.
408
00:14:49,323 --> 00:14:51,823
The last time I was in London,
409
00:14:51,859 --> 00:14:55,161
I went to Harrods to
buy pantyhose, and so,
410
00:14:55,196 --> 00:14:58,464
I go to the lingerie department,
411
00:14:58,499 --> 00:15:00,732
and Harrods had their
own brand of pantyhose,
412
00:15:00,768 --> 00:15:02,901
and they're the only ones I wear,
413
00:15:02,936 --> 00:15:05,137
and you can only buy
them at that counter.
414
00:15:05,172 --> 00:15:06,972
And their hose has three colors,
415
00:15:07,741 --> 00:15:10,642
Nude, White, and Nigger Brown.
416
00:15:10,678 --> 00:15:13,111
That was the name of the color.
417
00:15:13,147 --> 00:15:15,080
And that's the color I always buy.
418
00:15:15,115 --> 00:15:16,781
So I go to the counter,
419
00:15:16,816 --> 00:15:18,916
and the young woman
who was working there
420
00:15:18,951 --> 00:15:20,518
happened to be black.
421
00:15:20,554 --> 00:15:23,588
And I said to her, "I would
like medium-size hose."
422
00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:25,790
And she says, "What color, please?"
423
00:15:25,825 --> 00:15:28,059
and so I said, "Nigger Brown."
424
00:15:28,094 --> 00:15:29,994
And she was shocked.
425
00:15:30,029 --> 00:15:33,197
I said it just like that.
I could see she was upset.
426
00:15:33,232 --> 00:15:35,299
I said to her, "I did you the honor
427
00:15:35,334 --> 00:15:36,801
"of not noticing your color.
428
00:15:36,836 --> 00:15:40,171
Would you do me the honor
of getting my item for me?"
429
00:15:40,206 --> 00:15:41,371
So she went and got them,
430
00:15:41,407 --> 00:15:44,374
and after that, I paid for the hose.
431
00:15:44,410 --> 00:15:46,043
Just so you know.
432
00:15:46,079 --> 00:15:49,746
Oh, I need to use the loo.
433
00:16:03,667 --> 00:16:05,518
You know, you're are really nice fimily.
434
00:16:05,519 --> 00:16:07,457
Thank you. They love you,
435
00:16:07,547 --> 00:16:09,780
and I am sorry about my mom.
436
00:16:09,816 --> 00:16:11,456
No, no, no. Don't be
sorry about your mom.
437
00:16:11,484 --> 00:16:12,883
Never be sorry about your mom.
438
00:16:12,919 --> 00:16:16,721
No, Mel. I'm very sorry
about my shitty mother.
439
00:16:16,756 --> 00:16:19,156
Okay, well, I don't know her.
440
00:16:19,192 --> 00:16:21,592
No, you don't.
441
00:16:22,829 --> 00:16:24,929
Um...
442
00:16:24,964 --> 00:16:26,030
Yeah.
443
00:16:26,065 --> 00:16:27,664
I...
444
00:16:29,301 --> 00:16:30,667
You know, I have a friend
445
00:16:30,703 --> 00:16:35,239
who is very invested
in wanting us to have sex.
446
00:16:35,274 --> 00:16:36,707
Really?
447
00:16:36,742 --> 00:16:39,743
She needs us to do it. It's pretty bad.
448
00:16:40,946 --> 00:16:42,145
Well...
449
00:16:44,082 --> 00:16:46,583
But I'm not about to get into
a thing with a married guy.
450
00:16:46,619 --> 00:16:49,686
That's just not, that's not me.
451
00:16:52,257 --> 00:16:55,792
Well, I mean, I'm going
through a divorce right now,
452
00:16:55,827 --> 00:16:58,061
and I've been going through a divorce,
453
00:16:58,096 --> 00:17:00,797
and we've been separated for months.
454
00:17:02,267 --> 00:17:04,367
But I, uh, you know,
455
00:17:04,402 --> 00:17:05,969
am going back to New York tomorrow.
456
00:17:06,004 --> 00:17:07,237
Yeah.
457
00:17:07,272 --> 00:17:09,739
And as much as my brother
458
00:17:09,774 --> 00:17:12,541
would want me to throw down
with Sammy Fox, I mean...
459
00:17:12,577 --> 00:17:15,411
- Hey.
- Hey. You know.
460
00:17:15,446 --> 00:17:18,080
I don't know. I mean...
461
00:17:18,115 --> 00:17:20,249
I mean, I like you.
462
00:17:21,486 --> 00:17:23,952
But I don't want to hook up with you.
463
00:17:23,988 --> 00:17:27,322
I mean, actually, I really like you.
464
00:17:27,357 --> 00:17:29,324
Yeah, me, too.
465
00:17:29,359 --> 00:17:30,893
I mean, there's...
466
00:17:30,928 --> 00:17:31,994
No. Yeah.
467
00:17:32,029 --> 00:17:34,596
...a feeling there. Uh, it's...
468
00:17:34,631 --> 00:17:36,765
it's a nice feeling.
469
00:17:37,868 --> 00:17:38,934
Yeah.
470
00:17:38,969 --> 00:17:40,269
But me, too.
471
00:17:40,304 --> 00:17:42,904
I-I'm... I don't want to...
472
00:17:42,939 --> 00:17:44,339
I mean...
473
00:17:44,374 --> 00:17:45,540
- No, I...
- Just like...
474
00:17:45,575 --> 00:17:48,142
That's... There's your ride.
475
00:17:48,178 --> 00:17:50,144
- That's my ride.
- Yeah.
476
00:17:53,283 --> 00:17:54,783
Come here.
477
00:17:54,818 --> 00:17:55,750
Mm.
478
00:18:04,894 --> 00:18:08,662
Can I just tell you this was
the first peace I've felt
479
00:18:08,698 --> 00:18:12,066
in a very long time?
480
00:18:12,101 --> 00:18:13,634
Same.
481
00:18:16,071 --> 00:18:17,604
Bye, Sam.
482
00:18:22,044 --> 00:18:23,477
See you, Mel.
483
00:18:48,239 --> 00:18:54,290
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
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