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1
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Not another wedding
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Sure, they can be lovely
3
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But when you're a single girl and
most of your friends are married
4
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Let's just say, going to weddings can be treacherous
5
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I know Courtney and Steve mean well...yet I'm
always at the losers' table
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00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:36,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
7
00:00:49,100 --> 00:00:52,500
Okay, okay. I'll behave
8
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Maybe for once the guy that they put me
next to will be...decent.
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Weddings...what a joke
10
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Beautiful Ceremony, wasnt it?
11
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I couldn't believe they used 'thy shalt obey'
in the vows, who does that?
12
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Actually, I was..um...I was just making a little small talk.
13
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Great, they set me next to that guy
14
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What do you mean 'that guy'?
15
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Well, I'm sure you're not wearing a ring
and you're what? Mid-30s?
16
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Uh, late 20s
17
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It's uh...a early 30s
18
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Let me guess, you lease a really nice car you can never buy,
you never cry in movies and you only bang hot chicks.
19
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Have we met?
20
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No
21
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They're perfect for each other
22
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So, why don't you like weddings?
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It's a silly fairy tale. Marrying the man of your dreams
and living happily ever after and a gingerbread house
nestled in a field of cotton candy.
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Yummy
25
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No, I mean there's no such thing as soulmates
26
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So, you sleep around
27
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Sorry, I'm not your type
28
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I don't have a type, what makes you think I have a type?
29
00:02:03,370 --> 00:02:05,500
Please, you ever hear the phrase 'the clothes make the man'?
30
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I...I don't...maybe
31
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Well.....look at you
32
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What?
33
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You were invited to a formal wedding, but you obviously
couldn't afford a tuxedo,
34
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so you decided to get away from the dark suit and
matching tie; only you don't own a dark suit
35
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just a... navy blue blazer which judging by the lapels
what? 10 years old?
36
00:02:20,691 --> 00:02:24,370
Not that you couldn't afford a new one necessarily but
because you also chose not to get it cleaned and pressed.
37
00:02:24,371 --> 00:02:28,950
I'm guessing you're one of those people that just can't be
bother, as long as it still fits right why get a new one,
38
00:02:28,951 --> 00:02:29,500
Am I right?
39
00:02:29,950 --> 00:02:33,910
-Wow. Uh... I...
-Which would also explain the jeans and the stain on
your shirt. May I?
40
00:02:34,420 --> 00:02:35,100
What are you..
41
00:02:35,330 --> 00:02:40,700
Yeah, just like I thought. A clip on.
42
00:02:35,330 --> 00:02:40,700
Yeah, just like I thought. A clip on.
43
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You want me to show you?
44
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Yeah,hey, show the world. Flash.
45
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You don't know me
46
00:02:54,180 --> 00:02:57,900
Hi, can you do me a favor? Would you mind switching
seats with me? I don't think she'll attack her own.
47
00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:11,100
Beer,please. Do you know the score in the game?
48
00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:12,750
Thanks.
49
00:03:15,300 --> 00:03:17,900
-Thank you. I really appreciate it.
-Your Welcome, Steve.
50
00:03:18,370 --> 00:03:21,300
-Congratulations, bud.
-Thanks, man.
51
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You have service?
52
00:03:26,090 --> 00:03:26,800
May I?
53
00:03:27,360 --> 00:03:30,000
-How do I know you won't call a 900 number?
-I won't
54
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Fine.
55
00:03:36,500 --> 00:03:40,530
-Hey. It's Vince. Is the monkey there?
-Yeah
-How did I do today?
56
00:03:40,531 --> 00:03:47,250
-Not Good
-Damn it. Crap. Yeah, I know the
monkey's looking for me
57
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-Thank You.
58
00:03:50,550 --> 00:03:52,500
So how much do you owe?
59
00:03:53,890 --> 00:03:54,900
I don't know what you're talking about.
60
00:03:55,890 --> 00:04:01,400
You don't realise how transparent you are. Either you
owe money or you're being stalked by a monkey.
61
00:04:01,402 --> 00:04:04,600
It's not 'a' monkey. It's 'the' monkey
62
00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:07,700
So how much do you owe 'the' monkey?
63
00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:09,400
Enough.
64
00:04:11,140 --> 00:04:12,730
-Congratulations.
-Thank You.
65
00:04:15,540 --> 00:04:17,100
How big a haul would you say they'll take in?
66
00:04:17,101 --> 00:04:20,240
Have you seen the registry? I mean who needs a
600 towel warmer?
67
00:04:20,241 --> 00:04:22,148
People say gambling's throwing your money away.
68
00:04:22,149 --> 00:04:24,820
Plus, when I tried to get them something,
almost all the gifts had already been bought.
69
00:04:24,821 --> 00:04:26,690
And you should see the pile of gifts
she got at the bridal shower.
70
00:04:26,691 --> 00:04:30,820
I bet if you added up over the years, I've
spent 20 grand in wedding gifts.
71
00:04:30,822 --> 00:04:36,370
Yeah, yeah, at least. I guess in real life it's
like a savings account.
72
00:04:36,371 --> 00:04:39,080
We're supposed to get that money back
one day when we get married.
73
00:04:39,085 --> 00:04:41,910
We? Like I'd marry a guy like you.
74
00:04:42,380 --> 00:04:45,520
Really? I was kind of hoping we'd grow old together
75
00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:57,450
Besides the hernia and the back spasms,
I think that went very well.
76
00:04:57,700 --> 00:05:01,900
-I owe you one, Moving is the biggest drag there is
-So you still scared?
77
00:05:01,901 --> 00:05:07,500
I have no margin for error. I put all my savings into
the down payment. What if I get laid off?
78
00:05:07,700 --> 00:05:08,850
Am I crazy for doing this?
79
00:05:08,851 --> 00:05:12,630
Look, you've been saving for six years to buy your first place.
80
00:05:12,631 --> 00:05:17,930
You'll be fine.As long as you don't buy food or gas
or, God forbid, turn on a light.
81
00:05:17,931 --> 00:05:20,450
Ugh. Well, my whole food thing is overrated.
82
00:05:21,200 --> 00:05:26,500
I'll just really miss this place. Seven years,
three boyfriends, four crash diets.
83
00:05:26,501 --> 00:05:30,210
Ugh. That cabbage and cayenne-pepper thing almost killed me.
84
00:05:30,900 --> 00:05:32,360
I'm just gonna go take one last look around.
85
00:05:32,430 --> 00:05:33,911
All right, I'll use the little boys' room.
86
00:05:36,420 --> 00:05:38,800
It's great that you're moving into Courtney and Steve's building.
87
00:05:38,802 --> 00:05:40,860
Yeah, I wouldn't have found the apartment otherwise.
88
00:05:40,862 --> 00:05:43,600
I meant that they'll be there to help us unload on the other end.
89
00:05:44,110 --> 00:05:46,700
Don't you wish? They're still on their honeymoon.
90
00:05:49,260 --> 00:05:51,300
-I'll meet you outside.
-Okay.
91
00:06:01,300 --> 00:06:04,170
-Uh, Jennifer?
-Alright. I'll put it back.
92
00:06:04,171 --> 00:06:05,530
Can I show you something?
93
00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:12,760
-What happened?
-There's a slight possibility that I might have
left the keys in the ignition.
94
00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:17,500
You are no longer my gay boyfriend.
95
00:06:57,200 --> 00:07:00,000
Be the coffee maker. Be the coffee maker.
96
00:07:20,050 --> 00:07:22,150
The Monkey sends his regards.
97
00:07:22,170 --> 00:07:26,570
Fellas, how sweet. You decided to stop by, huh?
A phone call would have sufficed.
98
00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:28,600
Yeah, listen, you've got something for him.
99
00:07:28,650 --> 00:07:30,200
You have to tell the monkey I need some more time.
100
00:07:31,940 --> 00:07:36,250
Fellas, come on. There's got to be a choice.
There's always a choice, right?
101
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Yeah, like we can leave you in here on the floor in a
crumpled mess or out there on the tracks.
102
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I'll let you decide.
103
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Those are the only choices?
104
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That's a bad cough, Vince. You might want to get that
checked out.
105
00:07:53,281 --> 00:07:58,500
- Now, we'll be back next week. Either you have the
money by then or...?
- Yes.
106
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It'll be monkey business?
107
00:08:01,270 --> 00:08:06,000
I was just going to say break some bones, but that was
way more clever. You know, you're smarter than you look.
108
00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:08,080
You guys are really a cliche, you know that?
109
00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:11,300
- We are not.
- Are too.
- We are not.
110
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Let's get out of here
111
00:08:41,450 --> 00:08:44,700
-Congratulations.
-Excuse Me?
112
00:08:44,980 --> 00:08:48,330
Oh well, I couldn't help but notice.You know,
there's an easier way to do that.
113
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Everything is computerised these days,
so just choose what you want,
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aim the gun at the barcode and pull the trigger.
It's a lot of fun.
115
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Wow. This is fun.
116
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Here you go. You know what they say?
It pays to get married.
117
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-'Hey, it's Courtney. Leave me a message'.
-Hey, Courtney. It's Jennifer.I hope you guys are
having a great time on your honeymoon.
118
00:09:55,691 --> 00:10:00,125
But, listen, um, there was a guy at the wedding.
I think his name was Vince.
119
00:10:00,126 --> 00:10:04,800
Well, we were talking and I just have some information for him,
120
00:10:04,801 --> 00:10:09,710
so no big deal, but, you know, if you could call me
back with his number, that'd be great. Thanks.
121
00:10:13,800 --> 00:10:15,200
Ooh, the monkey guy.
122
00:10:19,450 --> 00:10:22,150
-Hi, is, uh... ? Is Monkey there?
-It's 'the' Monkey.
123
00:10:22,158 --> 00:10:23,470
-What?
-You heard me.
124
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'The' Monkey? You're the kidding, right?
125
00:10:25,801 --> 00:10:27,040
No, I'm not kidding.
126
00:10:27,041 --> 00:10:28,900
-Oh, Sorry.
-Who is this?
127
00:10:28,910 --> 00:10:34,970
Listen, a guy named Vince called you the other day from my phone,
and I really need to talk to him, but I don't have his number
128
00:10:34,971 --> 00:10:37,920
- I'll give it to you.
- Oh, that's great. Thanks.
129
00:10:38,900 --> 00:10:42,670
-You're very 'the' kind.
-What are you, smart?
-Okay, I won't do it again. I'm sorry.
130
00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:47,420
-I have to admit, I was a little surprised you called.
I didn't think you liked me.
131
00:10:47,421 --> 00:10:52,560
- I don't.
- Well, I don't like you either.
- Great. Lunch?
132
00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:58,120
Did you put it on a credit card? Maybe the
credit-card company insurance will pay for it.
133
00:10:58,121 --> 00:11:01,350
I checked. The truck is covered, but not what was in it.
134
00:11:01,351 --> 00:11:05,920
That's too bad. You know, I still don't see what
all this has to do with me, though.
135
00:11:05,921 --> 00:11:11,740
I was thinking about something you said at the wedding about how
the money we put into wedding gifts is like a savings account.
136
00:11:11,741 --> 00:11:19,592
Well, I really need to make a withdrawal. Really, really can't sleep
another night on throw pillows. So what I was thinking was...
137
00:11:19,593 --> 00:11:21,300
- I'm in.
- Well, I didn't even...
138
00:11:21,301 --> 00:11:25,251
I'm in. I love it. It's perfect. I'm in. We stage a fake wedding.
139
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We invite everyone that we know. You register for the stuff
you want to replace, I get to keep all the cash.
140
00:11:30,701 --> 00:11:34,000
It's perfect. I'm in. How long do we have to stay
married in order to keep the gifts?
141
00:11:34,001 --> 00:11:35,190
So you think it's a good idea?
142
00:11:35,191 --> 00:11:39,310
Ooh, you know what else? You could turn all the gifts into cash
too. Take the whole bundle down to the track,
143
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double and triple our money, furnish your place like a palace.
144
00:11:45,635 --> 00:11:49,340
Check, please. Yeah, this won't work. Wedding's off.
145
00:11:49,900 --> 00:11:53,460
Wow, talk about commitment issues. You're getting
cold feet over our pretend wedding.
146
00:11:55,490 --> 00:12:02,030
Hello? You're kidding? Where? That's great.
I'll be right there. Have a nice life.
147
00:12:02,450 --> 00:12:09,750
Wait a minute. Wait a minute. What about the money?
Your furniture? Our love?
148
00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:23,800
Oh, be the coffee maker. Be the coffee maker.
149
00:12:28,850 --> 00:12:31,600
So, you're thinking a DJ or a band?
150
00:12:46,300 --> 00:12:51,800
Oh, here it is. Invited guests have an obligation to
send a gift whether they are attending or not.
151
00:12:51,970 --> 00:12:58,080
Seriously? That is, that is awesome. So we need to invite
everyone that we know. In fact, we should invite
152
00:12:58,100 --> 00:13:04,815
everyone that we've ever met, especially the rich ones.
You know what? I spilled coffee once on Donald Trump.
153
00:13:04,816 --> 00:13:07,800
Why don't we send a couple of invites over to Trump
Tower, see what happens?
154
00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:10,560
- Brilliant!
-Thank you.
155
00:13:11,300 --> 00:13:17,100
Okay, just so we're clear - we announce our engagement,we send
out invitations and then just before the wedding, we call it off.
156
00:13:17,101 --> 00:13:20,200
I keep all the gifts for my apartment, and you
keep all the cash to pay off your debt.
157
00:13:20,205 --> 00:13:27,100
It's perfect. Plus, the girls love a guy who's been left at the altar,so
I will definitely be seeing some sympathy bow-chicka-wow-wow.
158
00:13:28,370 --> 00:13:31,600
Wow. I just hope people will buy that I've actually
lowered my standards this much.
159
00:13:31,605 --> 00:13:35,800
Ha. What does it say in there about calling it off?I need to
know how long we need to keep this charade up.
160
00:13:35,801 --> 00:13:36,920
I really need to pay off the monkey.
161
00:13:37,870 --> 00:13:43,280
Oh no. If the couple calls off their engagement prior to
the wedding, all gifts must be promptly returned.
162
00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:48,190
So, wait a minute. What does that mean?
That we have to actually go through with it?
163
00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:49,930
Apparently so.
164
00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:53,320
You and I are broke. We can't afford a wedding.
165
00:13:54,620 --> 00:13:58,840
Yes, we can. We pretend we're planning a wedding,
but then as the date approaches,
166
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we get overwhelmed with the details and have to elope.
It's perfect. We get the gifts, but without the wedding.
167
00:14:05,550 --> 00:14:06,500
That could work.
168
00:14:06,550 --> 00:14:10,250
It will work. All we have to do is convince
people that we're in love.
169
00:14:11,550 --> 00:14:13,340
-Oh, God.
-Oh, God.
170
00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:21,100
No, you know what? We can do this. We just have
to make up a story about our whirlwind romance.
171
00:14:21,101 --> 00:14:24,100
Yeah, like how I swept you off your feet
with my dashing good looks.
172
00:14:24,101 --> 00:14:25,910
Or something believable.
173
00:14:25,911 --> 00:14:29,005
What? Like your effervescent charm?
174
00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:35,830
No. Like we bonded over something we have in
common. Now, what do we have in common?
175
00:14:40,770 --> 00:14:42,600
- Any ideas?
- Not a one.
176
00:14:48,900 --> 00:14:53,300
Well, guess that's about it. I'm telling
you this guy is a real pig.
177
00:14:53,460 --> 00:15:00,600
I know. This is the first time I've ransacked a place and I
left it cleaner than I found it. What did we get, anyway?
178
00:15:00,601 --> 00:15:08,850
-Not much. A jar of pennies, a stack of vintage girlie magazines.
-And we'll have to wait until he gets here.
179
00:15:09,650 --> 00:15:14,230
- What is that?
- A dictionary. What's that thing he called us?
180
00:15:14,231 --> 00:15:16,600
- What do you mean? Cliche?
- Yeah, cliche.
181
00:15:18,820 --> 00:15:21,100
Cliche. Cliche.
182
00:15:22,170 --> 00:15:29,400
C-l-e-e-s-h-a-y.
I can't find it.
183
00:15:29,500 --> 00:15:36,100
Look, all I know is he better get here soon. 'Cause if I miss
Desperate Housewives, he'll be missing a finger.
184
00:15:41,650 --> 00:15:43,250
Where is that boy?
185
00:16:05,460 --> 00:16:08,610
- Hello?
- Honey, I'm home.
186
00:16:08,611 --> 00:16:14,800
-Did you leave something here, like your pride?
- Just let me in.
- I'm in my pyjamas.
187
00:16:14,820 --> 00:16:19,250
Ooh, how exciting! Just let me in or I'm
calling off the wedding.
188
00:16:24,110 --> 00:16:27,710
No. No, no, no, no. That was not part of
the deal. You cannot stay here.
189
00:16:27,711 --> 00:16:30,200
- Do you remember the monkey?
- Yeah, who could forget?
190
00:16:30,201 --> 00:16:35,540
Right now there are two gorillas outside my apartment waiting for me.
You want to become a widow before you ever get your shower gifts?
191
00:16:35,541 --> 00:16:38,710
Have you ever heard of these things called friends?
They come in really handy at times like this.
192
00:16:38,711 --> 00:16:43,460
I have a lot of friends, thank you very much.
I just owe them all money.
193
00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:45,350
Oh, wow, you're living the dream!
194
00:16:45,450 --> 00:16:47,900
It'll be one night. You won't even know I'm here.
195
00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:53,420
Fine. One night.
196
00:16:54,730 --> 00:16:56,610
What's with the gloves, Minnie Mouse?
197
00:16:56,611 --> 00:17:00,800
-Uh.. They're moisturising gloves.
-Right. It's probably a good idea at your age.
198
00:17:15,890 --> 00:17:20,600
-Honey, where are you going?
-To see Jennifer. I told you. She called and asked for
Vince's number.
199
00:17:20,601 --> 00:17:25,060
-It's 8 in the morning.
-We have been in Fiji for two weeks. I'm sure she's dying
to see him.
200
00:17:25,061 --> 00:17:28,650
- This is no time to be selfish, sweetie.
- Uh, a little help?
201
00:17:30,830 --> 00:17:33,980
How insensitive of me. I completely forgot...
202
00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:37,350
her housewarming gift. Thanks, honey.
203
00:17:48,750 --> 00:17:49,620
Jennifer.
204
00:17:53,070 --> 00:17:55,410
Jennifer, someone's at the door.
205
00:18:11,830 --> 00:18:12,660
(Jennifer)
206
00:18:29,300 --> 00:18:32,180
- Hello?
- Hello.
207
00:18:34,470 --> 00:18:43,610
-Hello.
-Vince, I can see you. Let me in.
208
00:18:48,580 --> 00:18:51,580
Hey, you're back from, um, your honeymoon, huh?
209
00:18:51,581 --> 00:18:54,620
Just got back. And you're...
210
00:18:56,580 --> 00:19:00,270
- ..here.
- Yeah. Yeah.
211
00:19:00,095 --> 00:19:06,200
So, uh, what's...? What's new?
212
00:19:06,900 --> 00:19:11,090
Married. What's new with you?
213
00:19:11,111 --> 00:19:16,550
Oh, not much. I-I woke up yesterday and my stomach was
a little upset.
214
00:19:16,670 --> 00:19:19,270
Vince, you tell me about Jennifer.
215
00:19:19,271 --> 00:19:21,110
- Her stomach's fine.
- Stop playing games.
216
00:19:21,111 --> 00:19:23,760
I mean, it looks like you two really hit it off.
217
00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:32,610
Yeah. Yeah, we did. She's great. Great. She, you know, we realised
we had... something in common.
218
00:19:32,611 --> 00:19:37,600
See, I knew it! Jennifer! Is she here?
219
00:19:37,605 --> 00:19:40,100
No. She left.
220
00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:42,180
Oh, she went to work?
221
00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:45,950
Yes. Yes, she did. Work. That's where she went.
222
00:19:46,300 --> 00:19:48,480
She's there working at work. At her job.
223
00:19:48,481 --> 00:19:50,610
That's what she- you know. That's what she does.
224
00:19:50,621 --> 00:19:53,300
That box looks awfully heavy. Can I take that from you?
225
00:19:55,530 --> 00:20:00,520
Huh. You know, I would've thought that she would've moved
her stuff in by now.
226
00:20:00,521 --> 00:20:04,950
I know. I know. It's a very long story, actually, one that
I'm sure she'll love to tell you herself.
227
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:14,630
Dammit. Um, I have to take this. Can you just give me one
moment, please?
228
00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:18,519
- Hello, Monkey?
- Monkey here.
229
00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:23,054
Monkey? Oh, that is so sweet. Is that Jennifer? Let me talk to her.
230
00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:25,550
No, no, no, no. This- this is my mom.
231
00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:32,400
I call her monkey because of her... face.
232
00:20:34,310 --> 00:20:36,390
It's kind of personal. Can you just give me one moment, please?
233
00:20:36,391 --> 00:20:38,870
- Yeah.
- Thank you. Thank you.
234
00:20:39,180 --> 00:20:42,340
Hey, sorry. Yeah, no, I'm with someone.
235
00:20:42,341 --> 00:20:45,510
I was wondering could I come over personally and talk to you
about my plan?
236
00:20:48,020 --> 00:20:50,800
Yes. Yes. I just got engaged.
237
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:56,450
No, no, that is the plan. I'm getting married.
238
00:20:58,400 --> 00:21:02,515
You're engaged, Vince? I gotta go. I'll see you later.
239
00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:06,000
No, but this plan is gonna work.
240
00:21:17,500 --> 00:21:20,360
Excuse me. The white one goes in recycling.
241
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:30,260
Nice day for a walk.
242
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:37,800
- I thought you said walk.
- Come on, man,
243
00:21:37,802 --> 00:21:41,800
you're getting married. You need the exercise. Besides, it'll
thin your face out for the pictures.
244
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,340
- Did wonders for me.
- You do look great.
245
00:21:44,341 --> 00:21:45,450
Why, thank you, Vince.
246
00:21:45,740 --> 00:21:47,500
Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute.
247
00:21:51,750 --> 00:21:55,500
- Where are we going?
- The Monkey wants to see you.
248
00:21:55,501 --> 00:21:58,000
- He didn't want to send a car?
- Monkey's gone green.
249
00:22:00,180 --> 00:22:01,970
Hey, how do you spell 'cliche'?
250
00:22:01,990 --> 00:22:03,740
-What?
-What? You got wax in your ears?
251
00:22:03,741 --> 00:22:05,780
That's a simple question. How do you spell 'cliche'?
252
00:22:05,781 --> 00:22:08,770
- C-l-i-c-h-e.
- Show me.
253
00:22:11,830 --> 00:22:15,000
- Hey, this is, this is my dictionary.
- Told you.
254
00:22:15,660 --> 00:22:17,660
No, it isn't. I bought it at a flea market.
255
00:22:18,410 --> 00:22:24,625
"To Vince on the occasion of his high-school graduation.
I am so proud of you. Love, Mom."
256
00:22:25,740 --> 00:22:29,450
-Coincidence.
-Look, just consider it interest on the loan. Now show him.
257
00:22:33,250 --> 00:22:35,000
Right here.
258
00:22:43,700 --> 00:22:47,440
Cliche - a very predictable or un...
259
00:22:47,530 --> 00:22:51,360
- Unoriginal.
- ..unoriginal person or thing.
260
00:22:52,840 --> 00:22:55,805
- You think I'm predictable?
- Yeah, I do.
261
00:22:55,900 --> 00:22:57,070
What am I going to do now?
262
00:22:59,100 --> 00:23:00,040
Punch me in the face.
263
00:23:01,970 --> 00:23:05,670
- Wrong. I'm going to punch you in the shoulder.
- Ow!
264
00:23:06,100 --> 00:23:08,850
Vince, now you'll need some ice on that.
265
00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:28,940
You think I'm an idiot, don't you? I'm just some dumb monkey
that'll fall for this stupid scheme.
266
00:23:29,330 --> 00:23:31,715
Look, I'll get your money, OK?
267
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:34,900
I've known you for the past, what, five years, Vince?
268
00:23:35,230 --> 00:23:39,150
- Yeah.
- In all that time, I've never seen you have a steady girlfriend.
269
00:23:40,100 --> 00:23:42,550
You're looser with your women than you are with your money.
270
00:23:42,900 --> 00:23:44,130
This wedding is different than that. The wedding...
271
00:23:44,131 --> 00:23:52,410
So excuse me if I just don't buy that you're ready for a life-long commitment,
which means you're either lying to your girl or you're lying to me.
272
00:23:52,411 --> 00:23:54,000
Or maybe he's lying to both of us.
273
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:58,500
Jennifer, what...? What are you doing here?
274
00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:01,555
- I thought you were done with this, Vince.
- Done with what?
275
00:24:01,557 --> 00:24:05,900
Done with gambling. You told me you'd never do it again,
and here you are being held at gunpoint.
276
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:12,310
- I'm sorry. I'm Jennifer. I didn't get your name.
- I'm, uh...
277
00:24:15,850 --> 00:24:17,080
It's Eugene.
278
00:24:17,400 --> 00:24:18,620
-Eugene?
-Eugene?
279
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:27,400
-You can call me Monkey.
-Oh, Mr. Monkey. We spoke on the phone. You gave me Vince's number,
remember?
280
00:24:27,401 --> 00:24:31,500
- I do.
- You have a very nice phone voice.
- Thank you.
281
00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:35,330
Now, how are we supposed to start a life together if I can't trust you?
282
00:24:36,420 --> 00:24:39,840
- How much does he owe?
- 15 grand plus interest.
283
00:24:39,841 --> 00:24:43,170
So, what are we talking about? 8%? Compounding weekly, monthly?
284
00:24:43,171 --> 00:24:46,800
- I'm not really sure. My accountant kind of handles all-
- It really doesn't matter.
285
00:24:47,080 --> 00:24:51,960
What matters is I'm here, Vince, and I know about your debt and
about your philandering past,
286
00:24:51,963 --> 00:24:56,460
and I'm here to help, OK? But we have to be completely honest
with each other.
287
00:24:56,461 --> 00:24:58,800
No more...no more secrets.
288
00:24:56,461 --> 00:24:58,800
No more...no more secrets.
289
00:25:01,580 --> 00:25:03,270
She's very supportive.
290
00:25:07,530 --> 00:25:10,400
- OK
- That's all you've got to say?
291
00:25:12,580 --> 00:25:19,060
No more secrets. I will never lie to you again. I just wanted to
give you that honeymoon in Italy.
292
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:26,650
Well, I guess our vacation will just have to turn into a stay-cation.
But, you know, Rome can't compare to our morning cuddles.
293
00:25:26,651 --> 00:25:29,500
- Oh, I love to spoon, man.
- I love pillow talk.
294
00:25:30,330 --> 00:25:40,000
Well, Mr Monkey, Eugene, I'll talk to you about Vince's debt right
after the wedding.
295
00:25:40,001 --> 00:25:39,420
I've got to get this guy out of here. He's meeting the parents tonight.
296
00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:41,100
Vince, you want me to shoot you now, man?
297
00:25:41,110 --> 00:25:43,550
Hey, don't make him any more nervous than he already is.
298
00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:48,900
Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a minute.
299
00:25:49,450 --> 00:25:54,200
I expect an invitation to the wedding, plus two guests.
300
00:25:54,540 --> 00:25:58,500
- Actually, we were thinking about elope...
- OK. Sure. Uh, fish or beef?
301
00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:00,860
- Beef.
- Beef.
- Fish for me.
302
00:26:00,861 --> 00:26:02,670
I'm watching my girlish figure.
303
00:26:03,630 --> 00:26:05,080
Oh, and you've got a month to get this done.
304
00:26:05,081 --> 00:26:07,550
- A month?
- I'm not sure it can happen that soon.
305
00:26:07,551 --> 00:26:10,870
Sometimes you have to book a year in advance just to reserve
the space.
306
00:26:10,872 --> 00:26:18,400
I'm sentimental, but I'm not stupid. One month. And under the
circumstances, the sweetness clause will be in effect.
307
00:26:18,650 --> 00:26:22,750
- The sweetness clause?
- A technicality. Nothin' to concern-yourself with.
308
00:26:23,180 --> 00:26:28,775
Now, Vince, give this lovely lady a kiss. I mean, after all, she did
save your life.
309
00:26:29,181 --> 00:26:33,530
- I-I.. Actually, we don't believe in public displays of affection.
- Yeah. It's tacky.
310
00:26:33,531 --> 00:26:34,680
Yeah, it is. Very much against that.
311
00:26:34,700 --> 00:26:39,200
Well, you'll have to kiss her in front of everyone you know. You might
as well start practising.
312
00:26:45,230 --> 00:26:51,050
Come on. She's your fiancee, not your cousin. Give her a kiss.
313
00:26:59,500 --> 00:27:01,000
Yeah, that's what's up
314
00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:04,470
That's more like it. You got yourself a good lady, Vince.
315
00:27:04,680 --> 00:27:10,300
I don't know how you did it, but you did it. It'll be a shame
if she was a widow before she got married.
316
00:27:10,401 --> 00:27:13,300
You got one month. Not a day more.
317
00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:20,300
Oh, and, Vince, good luck with the in-laws. Tell them I said hi.
318
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:22,280
- Hey, Eugene, that was nice.
- Monkey.
319
00:27:22,281 --> 00:27:23,260
- Yeah.
- Monkey.
320
00:27:27,100 --> 00:27:28,150
What are you doing?
321
00:27:32,750 --> 00:27:35,620
One month? Everyone's gonna think I'm pregnant.
322
00:27:36,260 --> 00:27:38,850
I'm about to get killed by gangsters and that's what you're
worried about?
323
00:27:39,250 --> 00:27:41,100
Look, I take my reputation very seriously.
324
00:27:41,101 --> 00:27:44,111
Trust me, the last thing anyone would call you is loose.
325
00:27:44,112 --> 00:27:45,620
And what is that supposed to mean?
326
00:27:45,900 --> 00:27:49,170
We have bigger fish to fry, OK? Like how we can afford the wedding.
327
00:27:50,300 --> 00:27:52,110
Wait a minute, aren't the bride's parents supposed to pay?
328
00:27:52,360 --> 00:27:56,099
No way. We are not asking my parents to pay for our fake wedding.
329
00:27:56,100 --> 00:27:59,900
We'll just have to figure something else out. Besides, they're still freaking
out that I'm engaged.
330
00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:03,070
- How did they find out?
- Courtney told Lisa,
331
00:28:03,071 --> 00:28:08,000
who told her mother, who told her podiatrist, who told my Aunt Dolly,
who told my mother.
332
00:28:09,220 --> 00:28:10,310
What did they say?
333
00:28:10,700 --> 00:28:14,150
I think her exact words were, "miracles do happen."
334
00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:17,400
- They got you pegged.
335
00:28:17,700 --> 00:28:20,530
Listen, my parents aren't the easiest people in the world to get along with,
336
00:28:20,531 --> 00:28:24,840
so just try not to say anything that's going to tick them off or make
them suspicious or...
337
00:28:24,841 --> 00:28:27,800
let me do all the talking, OK? The less they know about you, the better.
338
00:28:28,900 --> 00:28:33,380
I see. This really has nothing to do with your parents at all, does it?
It has to do with me.
339
00:28:34,180 --> 00:28:35,600
You don't think your parents will like me, do you?
340
00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:40,310
- No, I know they won't like you. They'll think I'm crazy.
- Oh, please. I'm a catch.
341
00:28:40,311 --> 00:28:44,150
Oh, please. You're like a 30-year-old man-child who has no friends,
342
00:28:44,151 --> 00:28:47,500
no money in the bank and no apparent ambition.
My parents will be so proud!
343
00:28:51,130 --> 00:28:51,900
We'll see.
344
00:28:58,340 --> 00:29:01,820
Remember, no talking. You're my mute fiance.
345
00:29:03,450 --> 00:29:06,720
Mom! Hey! There she is!
346
00:29:06,730 --> 00:29:10,280
Oh, my goodness, I cannot believe this! Forget that. Give me a hug.
347
00:29:10,290 --> 00:28:14,350
Wow! It is so good to meet you, really. I have heard so much
about you, it's ridiculous.
348
00:29:14,900 --> 00:29:18,160
- Oh my God, show me the ring. Show me the ring!
- Oh, the ring?
349
00:29:18,500 --> 00:29:21,410
Actually, um, Mom, there is no ring.
350
00:29:21,410 --> 00:29:25,370
- Oh, seriously. Come on, where's the ring?
- No, there is no ring.
351
00:29:25,830 --> 00:29:30,780
Jennifer and I were talking about it, and we decided to wait until we can
afford to buy the type of ring that she deserves.
352
00:29:30,990 --> 00:29:34,240
One as beautiful as her spirit, which I can tell she got from her mother.
353
00:29:34,260 --> 00:29:37,000
- Enough.
- Ow. Dad!
354
00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:40,890
- Hey!
- Wow, he is really spirited.
- Yeah.
355
00:29:40,900 --> 00:29:43,610
Sweetie, is that the dress I gave you?
356
00:29:43,611 --> 00:29:46,140
- Yeah, actually, it is.
- Oh, how strange.
357
00:29:46,151 --> 00:29:48,920
You know, it just looks so different on the hanger.
358
00:29:48,940 --> 00:29:51,650
It just goes to show you should always try things on, huh?
359
00:29:55,450 --> 00:29:59,350
That's Jennifer's sister Bonnie's wedding, and that's her husband, Will.
360
00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:03,180
And these - these are our grandbabies. There's Jonathan and Samantha.
361
00:30:03,330 --> 00:30:05,800
They're so adorable I just want to grab those pictures and eat 'em.
362
00:30:05,880 --> 00:30:08,620
- Oh, yeah.
- Perhaps we'll have some more grandkids soon.
363
00:30:08,630 --> 00:30:13,260
- Hmm.
- Honey, should you be drinking?
- Mom, I told you I'm not pregnant.
364
00:30:14,900 --> 00:30:17,600
It's crazy. I never knew that Jennifer had a sister.
365
00:30:17,531 --> 00:30:18,000
- Oh.
- Oh.
366
00:30:18,001 --> 00:30:20,730
Wait till you meet her. You'll love her. Everybody does.
367
00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:23,320
She was voted most popular at Slosson County High School.
368
00:30:23,325 --> 00:30:25,170
Oh. I have that yearbook here somewhere.
369
00:30:25,172 --> 00:30:28,500
Hon, I'm sure Vince would rather see pictures of Jennifer from high school.
370
00:30:28,501 --> 00:30:31,200
- Oh, we put those in the attic.
- Oh, that's right.
371
00:30:31,210 --> 00:30:34,020
Well, here's one of my graduation day from Harvard.
372
00:30:34,110 --> 00:30:37,830
Right. That was a proud day for all of us. Oh, well.
373
00:30:38,300 --> 00:30:41,000
- Come on, son. Let's eat. You hungry?
- Uh, yeah.
374
00:30:41,001 --> 00:30:42,700
- Got to be a long ride over here.
- Yeah, it is was.
- Yeah.
375
00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:59,795
Thank you so much for having me. Your home is absolutely
gorgeous. I don't think I've ever seen a home so beautiful.
376
00:30:59,799 --> 00:31:02,160
- Aw. That's so sweet.
- Did you pay somebody to decorate it?
- No, no.
377
00:31:02,165 --> 00:31:05,630
- I know you paid somebody. This place looks like a magazine.
- A great dinner.
378
00:31:05,650 --> 00:31:10,210
-Amazing. You're one hell of a cook.
-So, Vince, what do you do for a living?
379
00:31:10,930 --> 00:31:14,320
That is a good question, Dad. What do you do for a living, Vince?
380
00:31:10,931 --> 00:31:18,430
- You don't know?
- Well, I, yeah, I just love to hear him explain it.
381
00:31:21,100 --> 00:31:27,170
I'm in investment management. I analyse risk and reward and weigh
them against each other to maximise gain.
382
00:31:27,171 --> 00:31:31,510
Well, I have a little investment money set aside. Maybe you've
got some inside advice for me, Vinnie?
383
00:31:31,511 --> 00:31:34,650
- I've got a lot of ideas. How much have you got?
- Vince, what are you doing?
384
00:31:35,450 --> 00:31:39,050
- Just trying to help out dad.
- What about your family?
385
00:31:39,900 --> 00:31:46,750
We should have them over for dinner. Better yet, why not have us
all over to your new place? Oh, we're dying to see it.
386
00:31:46,850 --> 00:31:50,790
- I don't have a family.
- Um, I'm so sorry.
387
00:31:51,630 --> 00:31:55,690
- I grew up in a foster home.
- Oh, Vince. Why didn't you tell us?
388
00:31:55,691 --> 00:31:57,950
Vince doesn't really like to talk about it.
389
00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:03,110
Oh, it's OK, sweetheart. We're with family now. There were
four other children that lived there too.
390
00:32:03,111 --> 00:32:09,440
There was, um, Joe, Natalie, Blair and, of course, sweet little Tootie.
391
00:32:10,100 --> 00:32:16,540
We were guided through the trials of adolescence by the tender
hand of Mrs Garrett. Well, we always call her Mrs G.
392
00:32:18,290 --> 00:32:22,120
Now, well, you know, Mrs G always taught us to take the good...
393
00:32:23,340 --> 00:32:25,040
..and then take the bad...
394
00:32:26,290 --> 00:32:28,610
and then take them both.
395
00:32:29,700 --> 00:32:30,880
There you have it.
396
00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:36,800
- Wow, it's almost like a song.
- Yeah?
- Sounds like a wise woman.
397
00:32:36,850 --> 00:32:40,400
- I can't wait to meet her. Does she live in the area?
- Who?
398
00:32:40,810 --> 00:32:44,070
- Oh, my mother. Yes.
- Yeah.
399
00:32:44,073 --> 00:32:46,860
She does. Right outside the city. In the complete opposite direction.
400
00:32:46,861 --> 00:32:51,080
- Wonderful. Find out when it would be convenient for her.
- Mom, I haven't met her yet myself.
401
00:32:51,300 --> 00:32:53,940
What? Who gets married without meeting the parents?
402
00:32:57,950 --> 00:33:08,550
I guess we do. Oh, listen, when, uh- when you meet Mrs G, you know,
don't mention the whole foster home thing.
403
00:33:08,551 --> 00:33:13,030
She gets extremely sensitive about it 'cause she always
likes to think of me as her real son.
404
00:33:13,090 --> 00:33:18,000
- Oh, that is so lovely.
- Our lips are sealed.
- Thanks.
405
00:33:18,130 --> 00:33:21,020
- Sweetie, would you help me with the dessert?
- Ooh.
406
00:33:21,021 --> 00:33:22,090
Sure, Mom.
407
00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:25,960
See you in a minute, honey. Whoo!
408
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:39,100
I'll tell you, Dad, it's really great to get a sense of where
Jennifer comes from.
409
00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:41,230
Yeah. Is she pregnant? Tell me the truth.
410
00:33:42,260 --> 00:33:44,250
- No, she isn't.
- Damn.
411
00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:49,710
Why does that girl not hear her clock ticking?
Everybody else does. 'Tick-tock', 'tick-tock', 'tick-tock'.
412
00:33:49,712 --> 00:33:53,100
Yeah, it's more like , "Bong! Bong! Bong!"
413
00:33:53,830 --> 00:33:59,650
You got that right. High five.Vince, you seem
like a really decent guy,
414
00:33:59,651 --> 00:34:02,900
and I've got to say, I haven't seen Jennifer this happy in a long time.
415
00:34:03,510 --> 00:34:09,600
- Really? She seems happy to you?
- Yeah, it's the happiest I've seen her in years.
- Wow.
416
00:34:10,140 --> 00:34:14,250
- Hon, can you come in the kitchen?
- The potholder is in the bottom drawer.
417
00:34:14,800 --> 00:34:18,100
Memory is the first thing to go, after the sex, of course.
418
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:23,920
- I can't find 'em.
- OK.
419
00:34:26,350 --> 00:34:29,540
- Now, you two lovebirds try and keep your hands off each other.
- OK, Dad.
420
00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:35,200
Ow. Why do you keep doing that?
421
00:34:35,580 --> 00:34:40,300
Thanks to you, we have to have our parents over to my completely
empty apartment for a meet-and-greet.
422
00:34:40,315 --> 00:34:41,810
What happens when your mom shows up with your dad?
423
00:34:41,811 --> 00:34:45,000
You're not going to have to worry about it, because my dad
left my mom when I was a kid.
424
00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:48,750
What? Let me guess, One Day At A Time?
Your sister was Valerie Bertinelli?
425
00:34:49,170 --> 00:34:54,710
No, seriously, my dad left me when I was a kid. He
tried to get back in my life when I was a teenager,
426
00:34:54,711 --> 00:35:00,100
but it didn't really go over so well, so, um, you know,
we haven't really seen each other since.
427
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:07,700
Jennifer, we are paying for your wedding.
428
00:35:07,860 --> 00:35:11,880
- Oh, no, no, no. I said we'd take care...
- Honey, let your mother speak.
429
00:35:11,881 --> 00:35:16,370
- No, no, no. It's out of the question.
- Sweetie, be reasonable.
430
00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:16,370
- No, no, no. It's out of the question.
- Sweetie, be reasonable.
431
00:35:21,901 --> 00:35:26,490
- No, I'm sorry, we can't accept your money.
- We can't? I think we can.
432
00:35:26,491 --> 00:35:32,160
In fact, I think we should. How can we deny your mother and
your father the joy?
433
00:35:32,161 --> 00:35:38,770
- Oh.
- Fine.
- Now, there's just one catch.
434
00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:42,680
- We spent your wedding funds.
- What?
435
00:35:42,720 --> 00:35:47,070
- We landscaped the backyard. Doesn't it look great?
- Whoa, you spent my wedding fund?
436
00:35:47,071 --> 00:35:50,360
- We thought we had more time.
- Don't you worry.
437
00:35:50,361 --> 00:35:54,730
We'll just move some money around so we can throw you
the wedding of your dreams.
438
00:35:54,731 --> 00:35:57,900
- It'll be our gift to you.
- Mm-hm.
- Sounds great.
439
00:36:00,950 --> 00:36:02,420
That's great. All right.
440
00:36:21,120 --> 00:36:23,750
- I can't do this.
- This is too heavy?
441
00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:27,770
No, I'm talking about my parents. I can't let them pay for our wedding.
442
00:36:27,830 --> 00:36:30,150
You're giving them joy. Why would you want to hurt their feelings?
443
00:36:30,500 --> 00:36:36,330
Please. They've been hurting my feelings for years. It's payback.
I'm sorry. I can't let them pay for our fake wedding.
444
00:36:36,530 --> 00:36:39,710
- Did they pay for Bonnie's wedding?
- Of course.
- Was it nice?
445
00:36:40,300 --> 00:36:47,700
It was OK if you're into that sort of thing - custom Vera Wang dresses,
horse-drawn carriages, a flock of doves released when they kissed.
446
00:36:48,400 --> 00:36:50,300
My mom still cries when she talks about it.
447
00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:54,260
See? They just want to share that same number with you.
448
00:36:56,000 --> 00:36:58,860
- You're good.
- I'm just saying let them pay for the wedding.
449
00:36:59,190 --> 00:37:05,000
Then when and if you meet Mr Right - it's a big if - you can elope.
450
00:37:06,020 --> 00:37:11,560
- Look, we are going to pay them back.
- It's why we're having the wedding. We have no money,
451
00:37:11,561 --> 00:37:13,850
I have a monkey on my back, and you have an empty apartment.
452
00:37:14,060 --> 00:37:19,030
We're going to pay them back if it takes 10 years, OK? 50/50,
remember? Giving gives you joy.
453
00:37:19,031 --> 00:37:23,100
- I didn't sign up for ten years.
- Well, if you don't like the terms, go find another fake fiancee.
454
00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:29,730
- Fine. We'll pay them back.
- Swear on it.
455
00:37:30,730 --> 00:37:31,640
I swear.
456
00:37:36,940 --> 00:37:38,350
Oh, my God.
457
00:37:39,850 --> 00:37:45,320
- Ooh, it's time for Sports Centre.
- I'm so looking forward to our divorce.
458
00:37:58,320 --> 00:37:58,800
Yeah?
459
00:38:01,080 --> 00:38:02,630
- Hey.
- What are you doing up?
460
00:38:29,990 --> 00:38:08,510
I couldn't sleep, so I made myself a little snack. Thought my business
partner might like some.
461
00:38:09,260 --> 00:38:12,980
- Is that tiramisu?
- Yeah. My mom's an amazing cook.
462
00:38:12,981 --> 00:38:20,920
Taught me everything I know. Well, night.
463
00:38:21,820 --> 00:38:22,870
Thanks.
464
00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:36,750
-'Fox puts it up on the left-hand side of the back board.'
- Yes!
465
00:38:38,450 --> 00:38:41,720
Jen, I can't get over your new place. I love what you've done with it.
466
00:38:42,100 --> 00:38:46,700
- Thanks, Dad. I was going for the sweaty-locker-room feel.
- You nailed it.
467
00:38:46,850 --> 00:38:51,250
Don't worry. We'll go register at Not Just Sofas. All of this will go.
468
00:38:51,251 --> 00:38:55,430
- So, what are you ladies talking about over here?
- Just making plans.
469
00:38:55,433 --> 00:39:02,040
- Oh. Wow. What is that number right there?
- Uh, that is the price per head.
470
00:39:02,650 --> 00:39:06,510
Is that the price for a real human head? Because if not, it's way
too expensive
471
00:39:06,515 --> 00:39:10,950
Weddings aren't cheap, Vince. Don't worry. Al and I have got it covered.
472
00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:16,780
- Honey, remember our mantra - less food, more seats.
- Listen to that boy. He makes good sense.
473
00:39:16,781 --> 00:39:22,070
- Sweetie? We're throwing a wedding, not a tailgate party.
- We lucked out, Vince.
474
00:39:23,480 --> 00:39:31,050
The country club had a cancellation for April 25th. Can you imagine?
Less than a month before the wedding? Poor soul.
475
00:39:31,170 --> 00:39:40,770
Oh, well, I guess one girl's heartbreak is another girl's special day, hmm?
So, your first counselling session with Reverend Jim - it's Tuesday night.
476
00:39:40,771 --> 00:39:41,790
Counselling session?
477
00:39:41,791 --> 00:39:48,550
You just go in and chat with the Reverend about your relationship
and the hopes and fears you have about marriage.
478
00:39:48,580 --> 00:39:52,000
Oh, a lot of touchy-feely mumbo-jumbo if you ask me.
479
00:39:53,550 --> 00:39:54,850
What will we talk about?
480
00:39:55,160 --> 00:40:00,540
Mom, remember I told you Vince is not very religious. Do you think
maybe Reverend Jim would make an exception?
481
00:40:00,541 --> 00:40:03,480
He will not perform the ceremony unless you go through counselling first.
482
00:40:03,870 --> 00:40:09,000
Just say, 'yes, dear', It's two of the most important words to a successful marriage.
483
00:40:09,430 --> 00:40:10,990
Yes, dear.
484
00:40:10,991 --> 00:40:17,700
Honey, have you thought about colours? 'Cause I'm thinking teal, huh?
It's one of those few colours that doesn't wash you out.
485
00:40:19,450 --> 00:40:24,300
-There she is.
-Hi, Mom.
486
00:40:24,350 --> 00:40:30,500
Look at you. Give me a hug. Oh, you're just so huggable.
487
00:40:30,501 --> 00:40:36,570
I'm sorry, honey. I would've been here sooner, but I got lost.
I always get lost in a full moon. So, introduce me.
488
00:40:36,572 --> 00:40:39,470
- Hi.
- Uh, everybody, this is my mother, Catherine.
489
00:40:39,471 --> 00:40:41,800
Mom, these are Jennifer's parents. This is Val.
490
00:40:41,850 --> 00:40:52,750
Oh, it is so good to meet you. Oh... You smell wonderful. Like saffron.
491
00:40:53,700 --> 00:40:57,150
- Thank you.
- And that is Al.
492
00:40:57,700 --> 00:41:03,900
- Al.
- Oh. So, can we call you Mrs G.?
493
00:41:03,910 --> 00:41:07,270
- Uh, actually, I don't...
- Well, you can call me whatever moves you.
494
00:41:08,670 --> 00:41:17,420
And you must be Jennifer. Oh! Oh.
495
00:41:17,645 --> 00:41:23,400
I am sure that you hear this all the time, but you have
the most beautiful aura.
496
00:41:24,630 --> 00:41:26,290
Actually, that's a first.
497
00:41:25,110 --> 00:41:35,800
Well, it's true. It's purple and orange and swirls of magenta. I can tell that
you are a very passionate lover. Good work, son.
498
00:41:35,850 --> 00:41:46,730
Oh, let me see the two of you together. Click. Now I have an announcement
to make. I'm sure that Vince has told you a little bit about our family.
499
00:41:46,740 --> 00:41:49,800
He did. I hope someday we get to meet that Tootie.
500
00:41:49,801 --> 00:41:52,700
- Who?
- Mom, you and I should talk about this in private.
501
00:41:52,701 --> 00:41:55,450
It's OK, honey. These people are family now.
502
00:41:56,480 --> 00:42:01,680
As you know, Vince's father abandoned us to pursue his dream
of selfish isolation.
503
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:04,150
You've got to have goals.
504
00:42:04,870 --> 00:42:09,980
Luckily, my son is an Aries with a Saturn rising, so he perseveres.
505
00:42:09,990 --> 00:42:17,420
But a few days ago, out of the blue, his father called. It seems that
he's having regrets about some of the decisions that he made.
506
00:42:17,430 --> 00:42:22,150
And when I told him about Vince's wedding, he offered to pay
for half of it.
507
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:25,380
- Well, that's fantastic.
- No. We can't let him pay.
508
00:42:25,650 --> 00:42:31,280
We can't? I think we can. I think we should. I mean, how can we
deny him that joy?
509
00:42:32,400 --> 00:42:33,510
I'm not letting him pay.
510
00:42:38,710 --> 00:42:42,160
See? Now this is the perfect thing to talk about with Reverend Jim.
511
00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:43,960
Who's Tootie?
512
00:42:53,500 --> 00:42:57,289
- OK, well, that wasn't so bad.
- Can I just say one more thing?
513
00:42:57,290 --> 00:42:58,740
Sure. Express yourself.
514
00:42:59,670 --> 00:43:07,210
He refuses to go see his dad. You know, it's clear he has abandonment
issues, but I just feel that rather than avoiding them, he should
515
00:43:07,211 --> 00:43:10,410
he should confront them head-on. It would really help with his
personal growth.
516
00:43:10,780 --> 00:43:16,530
She's the one who's still desperately searching for approval from her
parents, so I really wish she would leave my personal growth out of this.
517
00:43:16,532 --> 00:43:20,720
Vince, don't you see why Jennifer is concerned with your
relationship with your father?
518
00:43:20,721 --> 00:43:22,640
Yeah, because she wants him to pay for half of the wedding.
519
00:43:22,650 --> 00:43:29,738
I'm sure that Jennifer is more concerned with how you bring these feelings
into your role as father to your own children. Isn't that right, Jennifer?
520
00:43:29,740 --> 00:43:31,400
No, I want his father to pay for half.
521
00:43:32,950 --> 00:43:35,650
- Oh, I see.
- You with me?
522
00:43:38,180 --> 00:43:43,400
I mean I'm not the crazy one but it doesn't take Dr Phil to see that your
father is somehow the root of your gambling problem.
523
00:43:43,410 --> 00:43:46,900
- Gambling problem?
- I do not have a gambling problem.
524
00:43:46,901 --> 00:43:53,210
Oh, come on. I would say owing 15,000 to a bookie named
'The' monkey who's gonna have you killed unless you pay him
525
00:43:53,211 --> 00:43:55,190
I would say that's a pretty big problem, wouldn't you?
526
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:58,550
- Vince, you owe 15,000 to a bookie?
- Named 'The' Monkey.
527
00:43:58,555 --> 00:44:02,160
Who's gonna have him killed if he doesn't pay - I got that part.
Is it true?
528
00:44:02,170 --> 00:44:06,370
- No. It is not true. I do not owe 15,000.
- What?
529
00:44:06,400 --> 00:44:14,520
- It's 20,000. Ah, didn't see that one coming now, did you?
- No, I didn't. You owe another 5,000 dollars?
530
00:44:14,529 --> 00:44:21,820
No, not exactly. Remember what The Monkey was talking to us
about at the zoo? The sweetness clause? It's like a service charge.
531
00:44:21,900 --> 00:44:25,700
For those special occasions when The Monkey shows just
how sweet of a guy he can be.
532
00:44:26,360 --> 00:44:29,060
Jennifer, tell Vince how this makes you feel.
533
00:44:29,080 --> 00:44:34,370
I feel like I cannot wait for this to be over so I never have
to see you again.
534
00:44:34,375 --> 00:44:36,070
Don't expect a Christmas card from me either, sweetie.
535
00:44:36,071 --> 00:44:39,265
- I'm not even sure you know how to write.
- OK. I think we're done here.
536
00:44:39,270 --> 00:44:43,310
- Yeah.
- Hold on. Hold on. I'm confused. Are we calling the wedding off?
537
00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:44,350
- No way.
- No way.
538
00:44:56,550 --> 00:44:58,520
Oh, good. You're home.
539
00:44:58,540 --> 00:45:00,400
Mom, those keys are for emergencies only.
540
00:45:00,401 --> 00:45:04,150
- This is an emergency.
- The wedding is off.
541
00:45:04,151 --> 00:45:04,770
- What?
- What?
542
00:45:04,780 --> 00:45:09,790
- Your father played golf this morning with Reverend Jim.
- He told me about your little gambling problem.
543
00:45:09,800 --> 00:45:18,820
- I don't have a gambling problem.
- I'm sorry, son. I'm not letting my daughter marry an
addicted gambler.
544
00:45:18,860 --> 00:45:20,340
I thought it was supposed to be confidential.
545
00:45:20,720 --> 00:45:26,430
Oh, Reverend Jim is a terrible gossip. Thank God we're not
catholic. That man could never handle confessions.
546
00:45:26,740 --> 00:45:31,100
Vince, we feel for your predicament. We think you're a good
guy, but we've got to look out for Jennifer.
547
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:35,830
- She hasn't always made the best choices when it comes to men.
- Excuse me?
548
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:40,250
- Remember Bobby Sherwood, the gum-in-hair incident?
- Uh, that was junior high.
549
00:45:40,510 --> 00:45:46,630
- Just saying it's a pattern.
- I'm sorry. We can't support this wedding.
550
00:45:47,500 --> 00:45:53,450
- I see.
- Mom, Dad, I'm ashamed of you. Marriage isn't only for the
good times.
551
00:45:53,820 --> 00:45:57,860
- Mom, did you leave Dad when he had that awful toenail fungus?
- No.
552
00:45:58,180 --> 00:46:04,350
- Dad, did you leave mom when she gave herself that bad home
perm and was bald for a year?
- No.
553
00:46:04,460 --> 00:46:08,980
- And I'm not leaving Vince in his time of need, either.
- Thanks.
554
00:46:09,760 --> 00:46:12,525
Besides, the catering deposit is non-refundable.
555
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:13,850
It is?
556
00:46:13,870 --> 00:46:16,280
- Won't get a dime back.
- Can they do that?
557
00:46:16,320 --> 00:46:17,430
- Yes.
- Yes.
558
00:46:18,840 --> 00:46:26,200
- And on top of all that, Vince has agreed to go to
Gamblers Anonymous.
- Oh!
559
00:46:26,930 --> 00:46:30,220
- What?
- You can beat this, son.
560
00:46:30,970 --> 00:46:32,370
I am so proud of you.
561
00:46:35,400 --> 00:46:39,060
Hi, I'm, uh, Vince, and, uh, I'm a gambler.
562
00:46:39,290 --> 00:46:41,170
ALL: Hi, Vince.
563
00:46:46,470 --> 00:46:47,210
Still me?
564
00:46:49,770 --> 00:46:53,180
Well, um, what can I say? Um...
565
00:46:57,670 --> 00:46:59,420
You got to know when to hold 'em.
566
00:47:01,770 --> 00:47:04,570
Know...when to fold 'em.
567
00:47:08,120 --> 00:47:09,200
Thank you.
568
00:47:14,400 --> 00:47:16,000
That felt good.
569
00:47:16,580 --> 00:47:17,495
Crazy, huh?
570
00:47:17,496 --> 00:47:21,850
Yeah. You've known this guy, what, a month? You sure
you're not preggo?
571
00:47:22,100 --> 00:47:25,420
I mean, we are a David's Bridal, I'm sure we can find
something with an empire waist.
572
00:47:25,830 --> 00:47:27,400
No, I'm not preggo.
573
00:47:27,510 --> 00:47:32,320
When am I going to meet this Vince? Wait a minute,
why haven't I met Vince? Has the family met him?
574
00:47:33,320 --> 00:47:36,800
Everyone but Bonnie. Courtney, what do you think of this one?
575
00:47:37,150 --> 00:47:37,930
Sorry, what?
576
00:47:38,130 --> 00:47:38,850
What do you think?
577
00:47:39,040 --> 00:47:40,470
This one's my favourite.
578
00:47:44,610 --> 00:47:46,690
Hi, my name is Ben, and I'm a gambling addict.
579
00:47:46,879 --> 00:47:49,250
ALL: Hi, Ben.
- What's Up?
580
00:47:49,260 --> 00:47:52,970
Horses were my thing. I spent more time at the track than I
did with my family.
581
00:47:52,971 --> 00:47:54,200
Ugh, I hear you.
582
00:47:54,540 --> 00:48:03,070
And at my lowest point, I was over 300,000 in debt. Thanks to
these meetings, I've been able to control my addictions,
583
00:48:03,071 --> 00:48:05,840
and I haven't placed a bet in over five years.
584
00:48:07,460 --> 00:48:08,500
Way to go.
585
00:48:10,300 --> 00:48:18,620
In fact, I just took my company public. Who would've ever
thought I would be a multimillionaire? I mean, thanks.
586
00:48:24,020 --> 00:48:27,060
Ben shows us what is possible when we work the programme.
587
00:48:27,075 --> 00:48:29,750
I had a feeling you two would hit it off.
588
00:48:29,980 --> 00:48:31,050
Really? Why?
589
00:48:31,400 --> 00:48:38,485
Because I know you, and I know how important loyalty is to
you. And Steve told me that out of all his friends,
590
00:48:38,486 --> 00:48:42,290
Vince is the one guy that he could always count on 24-7.
591
00:48:42,370 --> 00:48:45,960
How is he with his mother? That says a lot about how he'd
be with you.
592
00:48:46,000 --> 00:48:47,780
Well, he's wonderful with her.
593
00:48:48,300 --> 00:48:51,670
- And you said that he gets along with your parents?
- Strangely, yes.
594
00:48:52,450 --> 00:48:56,810
- Well, then he must really love you.
- Forget the parents. How is he at the horizontal hokey-pokey?
595
00:48:56,820 --> 00:49:00,120
- You guys.
- Yeah, David, so rude.
596
00:49:00,860 --> 00:49:05,050
- But can we talk about his body?
- Seriously, he has ab muscles I didn't know existed.
597
00:49:05,980 --> 00:49:09,500
- Oh, my God, you're blushing.
- No, I'm not.
598
00:49:09,501 --> 00:49:15,430
- Yes, you are. I'm not sure I've ever even seen you blush before.
- Aww.
599
00:49:19,140 --> 00:49:23,580
- Ben, hey.
- Hey.
- Vince. Hi. I spoke a little earlier.
600
00:49:23,581 --> 00:49:32,270
- I remember.
- Yeah. Um, listen, your story saved my life tonight, and, uh,
I was just wondering...
601
00:49:32,272 --> 00:49:38,320
- If I'd be your sponsor? Sure. Absolutely.
- Actually, if you'd come to my wedding.
- But we just met.
602
00:49:38,323 --> 00:49:46,130
I know. I know. It's just that you've been such a wealth...
of inspiration to me, Ben.
603
00:49:46,300 --> 00:49:50,530
- If you could write down your name and address,
I would love to send you an invitation.
- Sure, um...
604
00:49:50,970 --> 00:49:55,150
- Paper. Pen.
- Sure. Appreciate it.
605
00:49:58,780 --> 00:49:59,400
- That's great.
- Here you go.
606
00:49:59,450 --> 00:50:01,170
- Thank you. Thanks.
- Thank You.
607
00:50:01,180 --> 00:50:02,470
- See you soon.
- You got it.
608
00:50:02,970 --> 00:50:07,490
I'm sorry, I couldn't help but overhearing. You're not really
getting married, are you?
609
00:50:07,700 --> 00:50:11,280
- Why do you ask?
- It's just that you don't seem like the marrying type, that's all.
610
00:50:11,670 --> 00:50:19,300
- A lot of people keep saying that. Well, I guess I am the type,
because, yes, I am getting married.
- Too bad.
611
00:50:23,570 --> 00:50:28,440
- But not for several weeks.
- I know we're not supposed to gamble any more.
612
00:50:28,510 --> 00:50:33,100
- That's my understanding too.
- That doesn't rule out all risky behaviour, does it?
613
00:50:33,670 --> 00:50:43,120
- What did you have in mind?
- Buy a girl a drink?
- Maybe just one.
614
00:51:21,470 --> 00:51:22,310
That bad?
615
00:51:22,380 --> 00:51:25,390
- You look amazing.
- Where was that one when I was looking?
616
00:51:31,500 --> 00:51:35,630
So, she's a real spitfire, I'll tell you that. She does
not make it easy.
617
00:51:36,510 --> 00:51:45,000
- Well, relationships never are.
- There is something kind of cool about her, something
that just, I don't know, sneaks up on you.
618
00:51:46,370 --> 00:51:53,410
- That's great. Well, this is my stop.
- Be careful getting off.
619
00:51:54,720 --> 00:51:55,770
That'll be up to you.
620
00:52:14,480 --> 00:52:20,560
Well, Mr Gambling Man, of the marrying type, just how
much risk are you willing to take?
621
00:53:02,100 --> 00:53:04,100
- Hey.
- Hey there, Bridezilla.
622
00:53:05,240 --> 00:53:08,810
- What are you doing?
- I made us a lasagna so that we can celebrate.
623
00:53:09,100 --> 00:53:13,700
- Celebrate?
- Yeah, we got our first official wedding gifts today.
624
00:53:13,900 --> 00:53:19,600
- You are now the proud owner of a cupcake carrier and a
cheque for 100 bucks.
- Awesome.
625
00:53:21,000 --> 00:53:24,560
- Oh, hey, um, sorry about last night.
- Last night?
626
00:53:25,050 --> 00:53:29,340
- I should've called and let you know I wasn't going to
come home.
- Oh, did you not come back? I didn't notice.
627
00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:37,010
- Oh. OK, well, good.
- And we're just fake fiances, Vince, remember? It's not
like we're really in love.
628
00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:39,020
- I got it.
629
00:53:40,920 --> 00:53:43,150
You know, at some point we're going to have to talk about our
vows.
630
00:53:43,760 --> 00:53:47,700
- Don't we just repeat what the reverend says?
- Ugh, church vows are so cold and impersonal.
631
00:53:48,200 --> 00:53:51,800
Yeah, I'd hate for our fake vows at our fake wedding to not be from the heart.
632
00:53:51,801 --> 00:53:57,279
Look, all of my family are friends are gonna be there. If the vows are gonna be
fake, I'd still like for them to be impressive.
633
00:53:57,280 --> 00:53:58,830
Can't you just read a poem or something?
634
00:53:59,120 --> 00:54:02,450
Okay, you know what? Never mind. I'll write your vows for you. You don't
have to worry about it.
635
00:54:03,340 --> 00:54:05,400
- What about your vows?
- What do you mean?
636
00:54:05,960 --> 00:54:09,600
You get to write exactly what you want me to say. What about what you're
going to say to me?
637
00:54:10,400 --> 00:54:12,189
I thought I'd just read a poem or something.
638
00:54:12,190 --> 00:54:14,700
What? No, I don't think so. You know what? I'm gonna write your vows.
639
00:54:14,710 --> 00:54:16,800
- Fine.
- Can I get a piece of paper?
640
00:54:18,450 --> 00:54:21,000
- Got an extra pen?
- What is that?
641
00:54:22,740 --> 00:54:23,600
It's a pen.
642
00:54:27,210 --> 00:54:27,520
Okay.
643
00:54:37,250 --> 00:54:38,400
What do you have so far?
644
00:54:40,570 --> 00:54:44,550
"Jennifer, I don't know how loving a person could be until I met you."
645
00:54:46,880 --> 00:54:49,010
- What?
- I just sound like such a loser.
646
00:54:49,011 --> 00:54:50,240
You are a loser.
647
00:54:50,390 --> 00:54:52,320
I don't think I could read that with a straight face.
648
00:54:52,321 --> 00:54:54,390
Well, I don't know if you can even read, period.
649
00:54:54,960 --> 00:54:58,510
You know what? Enjoy the lasagna. I've lost my appetite.
650
00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:00,900
Maybe you left it where you were last night.
651
00:55:00,901 --> 00:55:03,470
Uh.. So now I'm supposed to check with you, my fake fiance.
652
00:55:03,471 --> 00:55:06,530
No, because that would be considerate, something you know
nothing about.
653
00:55:06,531 --> 00:55:13,530
Well, for your information, I walked someone home last night,
and then I slept at my mom's. Why? I have no idea.
654
00:55:16,600 --> 00:55:17,460
Hello?
655
00:55:18,290 --> 00:55:20,210
Oh, my God. OK, I'll be right there.
656
00:55:20,680 --> 00:55:21,740
What happened?
657
00:55:22,220 --> 00:55:24,870
My sister's in the hospital. She had a car accident.
658
00:55:27,900 --> 00:55:29,130
Jennifer!
659
00:55:29,490 --> 00:55:31,080
Hey, guys.
660
00:55:31,930 --> 00:55:32,700
Hey.
661
00:55:34,390 --> 00:55:35,280
Where are Grandma and Grandpa?
662
00:55:35,570 --> 00:55:38,110
- Inside with Mom and Dad.
- They won't let us see Mommy.
663
00:55:38,150 --> 00:55:40,940
They didn't want Samantha to get scared. I have to stay with her.
664
00:55:40,941 --> 00:55:43,170
OK, you guys are gonna be OK out here by yourselves for
a little while?
665
00:55:43,330 --> 00:55:46,140
- Yep. I'm in charge.
- OK, I'll be right back, OK?
666
00:55:49,520 --> 00:55:51,700
- Who's he?
- Some guy.
667
00:56:00,390 --> 00:56:05,550
Bonnie? I'm sorry, hon. I'm so sorry.
668
00:56:05,925 --> 00:56:09,010
Look, I know our relationship has been rocky.
669
00:56:11,440 --> 00:56:13,000
What can I say?
670
00:56:14,720 --> 00:56:16,040
Here's what I can say.
671
00:56:18,370 --> 00:56:24,450
You're my little sister, so I didn't expect you to get married
first. But you did,
672
00:56:24,870 --> 00:56:26,330
and I had to deal with that.
673
00:56:28,360 --> 00:56:33,870
And then Jonathan and Samantha came along, and you guys
were like the picture-perfect family.
674
00:56:35,075 --> 00:56:40,480
And Mom and Dad wanted to spend all their time with you
guys, and I just... I felt like an outsider.
675
00:56:42,430 --> 00:56:47,000
And I admit I was jealous. I'm still jealous.
676
00:56:47,100 --> 00:56:52,830
But if you could just pull through, I promise I'll put all that
behind me.
677
00:56:55,860 --> 00:57:01,540
In fact, I was thinking you'd make a pretty good maid of honour.
678
00:57:02,030 --> 00:57:03,980
All you had to do was ask.
679
00:57:11,390 --> 00:57:12,530
Feel better.
680
00:57:13,940 --> 00:57:15,780
Mom said you were hit by a truck.
681
00:57:15,800 --> 00:57:16,690
Mom!
682
00:57:16,700 --> 00:57:19,940
Those weren't the exact words I used.
683
00:57:19,950 --> 00:57:28,440
No, I was getting some of the kids' stuff out of the attic to give to Goodwill,
and I accidentally stepped on a TOY TRUCK near the stairs.
684
00:57:28,441 --> 00:57:29,900
Thank God you're OK.
685
00:57:31,560 --> 00:57:34,350
So, I guess you heard all that, huh?
686
00:57:34,980 --> 00:57:36,000
Yeah.
687
00:57:38,470 --> 00:57:39,380
I love you.
688
00:57:41,310 --> 00:57:42,530
I love you too.
689
00:57:42,700 --> 00:57:44,920
Come here. Give me a hug.
690
00:57:47,950 --> 00:57:51,310
Hope you guys aren't the type of kids who are used to the adults
letting you win all the time.
691
00:57:51,540 --> 00:57:57,350
It's not gonna be that way tonight. Oh, no, tonight
this game is on. It's on like a night light.
692
00:57:58,720 --> 00:57:59,320
Let's go.
693
00:58:11,740 --> 00:58:13,800
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
694
00:58:14,000 --> 00:58:23,650
Get rid of this guy! Whoo-hoo-hoo! Whoo!
Parade around your leader!
695
00:58:32,190 --> 00:58:34,380
He's angry. He's angry.
696
00:58:35,250 --> 00:58:36,870
He's turning into a monster.
697
00:58:37,590 --> 00:58:44,100
OK. Now visiting hours are over. Your dad's gonna stay
here tonight, so you kids get to come home with us.
698
00:58:44,105 --> 00:58:45,020
Come on.
699
00:58:45,030 --> 00:58:47,320
Unless you guys want to come back to
our place with us tonight.
700
00:58:47,370 --> 00:58:48,020
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
701
00:58:48,025 --> 00:58:49,750
Whoo! That's what I thought!
702
00:58:52,770 --> 00:58:55,810
OK, good job. Good game.
703
00:59:21,660 --> 00:59:25,970
So, uh, I guess I'll just sleep in here tonight.
704
00:59:27,500 --> 00:59:28,910
Hey, Vince, how's your stamina?
705
00:59:30,280 --> 00:59:31,510
Never had any complaints.
706
00:59:31,520 --> 00:59:33,710
And how's your lung capacity?
707
00:59:35,710 --> 00:59:36,740
Fantastic.
708
00:59:37,800 --> 00:59:40,950
Great. Then you'll have no problem blowing up the bed.
709
00:59:42,987 --> 00:59:43,850
Good night.
710
01:00:03,580 --> 01:00:04,520
What's up, boss?
711
01:00:04,700 --> 01:00:05,700
What have you got for me?
712
01:00:05,970 --> 01:00:10,510
From the pizza man. Bam.
713
01:00:14,290 --> 01:00:15,200
Not bad.
714
01:00:08,290 --> 01:00:19,300
Oh!
715
01:00:19,770 --> 01:00:20,960
What is this?
716
01:00:21,130 --> 01:00:24,260
- He only came up with half the cash.
- So we took half his finger.
717
01:00:25,640 --> 01:00:26,510
What else?
718
01:00:26,800 --> 01:00:28,810
We paid Vince a visit like you asked.
719
01:00:29,240 --> 01:00:30,270
- And?
720
01:00:35,180 --> 01:00:39,400
- They went with the hydrangeas for the centrepieces.
- And wisteria for the bouquet.
721
01:00:40,130 --> 01:00:41,740
Nosegay or cascade?
722
01:00:42,100 --> 01:00:43,440
I forgot to ask.
723
01:00:45,340 --> 01:00:47,700
Well, go and find out.
724
01:00:48,090 --> 01:00:49,980
Pay attention to detail, Truck.
725
01:00:50,090 --> 01:00:52,320
Pay attention to detail, Truck.
726
01:00:55,260 --> 01:01:01,400
Come on. You take this one. I've got to tell you
something, kid. You're pretty good at this thing.
727
01:01:01,530 --> 01:01:02,150
I know.
728
01:01:02,580 --> 01:01:04,470
Hey, no more video games. It's time for bed.
729
01:01:04,780 --> 01:01:08,510
- Oh, come on. Just one more game, Aunt Jen?
- Yeah, I'm really behind here.
730
01:01:08,540 --> 01:01:12,900
I said yes one game ago. Now get in that bed- well,
chair, little man.
731
01:01:13,850 --> 01:01:15,520
All right. Let's do it.
732
01:01:16,130 --> 01:01:16,960
Get in there.
733
01:01:18,390 --> 01:01:21,220
All right, night, buddy.
734
01:01:22,360 --> 01:01:23,710
Aren't you going to tuck me in?
735
01:01:24,240 --> 01:01:36,670
You... Yeah. Uh, sure. Why not? Um, but be warned, this will be
my first official tucking, all right? There you go. Night-night.
736
01:01:38,400 --> 01:01:40,330
- Uncle Vince?
- Yeah?
737
01:01:41,200 --> 01:01:48,980
- Are we going home soon?
- Oh, you didn't hear? Your mother called earlier, and she said
that you guys get to stay with us forever.
738
01:01:49,180 --> 01:01:52,880
- No! I want to go home!
- Hey! Calm down. Inside voice.
739
01:01:52,881 --> 01:01:57,160
- What? What happened?
- Um, I think I broke him.
740
01:01:57,310 --> 01:02:02,130
- Jonathan, tell Aunt Jen what's wrong?
- Uncle Vince said Mommy left us here forever.
741
01:02:03,640 --> 01:02:07,000
- It was a joke.
- Uncle Vince was just trying to be funny.
742
01:02:07,220 --> 01:02:09,710
- But he's not funny.
- Yeah, tell me about it.
743
01:02:10,160 --> 01:02:16,630
- Hey, do you have any favourite night-time stories?
- Hmm. um, Peter Pan.
744
01:02:16,690 --> 01:02:23,040
- Oh, really? I don't think I know that one. Can you...?
Can you tell it to me?
- OK, well, it's about this kid named Peter Pan.
745
01:02:23,270 --> 01:02:32,220
- Oh, I like it already.
- And also there's this girl, Wendy, and this fairy, Tinker Bell, and
this pirate that has a hook instead of a hand.
746
01:02:32,490 --> 01:02:39,230
- Oh, really? What else?
- Well, Peter Pan takes Wendy and her brothers off to Neverland,
and they go on an adventure...
747
01:02:50,070 --> 01:02:54,520
- I'm sorry you've had to sleep on that air mattress this whole time.
- That's all right. It's fine.
748
01:02:54,910 --> 01:03:00,100
- Well, you haven't complained once. It's almost like you're a real adult.
- That's the worst thing that anyone has ever told me.
749
01:03:06,560 --> 01:03:10,290
- Good night, Vince.
- Night, Jennifer.
750
01:03:18,380 --> 01:03:22,900
- I think you've sprung a leak.
- It's a slow leak. I'll be fine.
751
01:03:27,620 --> 01:03:29,100
- I guess you could sleep up here.
752
01:03:31,700 --> 01:03:32,620
- Wouldn't that be weird?
753
01:03:34,220 --> 01:03:35,760
- Just stay on top of the covers.
754
01:03:51,340 --> 01:03:51,760
Night.
755
01:04:27,320 --> 01:04:28,770
Wait. What are we doing?
756
01:04:30,080 --> 01:04:33,370
- Have you never done this before?
- Shut up.
757
01:04:38,540 --> 01:04:39,200
Who is it?
758
01:04:42,420 --> 01:04:45,330
- I don't feel so good.
- What's the matter, sweetie?
759
01:04:45,900 --> 01:04:47,020
I have a tummy...
760
01:04:54,860 --> 01:05:01,340
- You feel better now? Come on. Uncle Vince will clean you up,
all right?
- I want Aunt Jennifer to do it.
761
01:05:02,040 --> 01:05:05,660
You do? Oh, come here. Let Aunt Jen take care of you.
762
01:05:12,860 --> 01:05:14,480
I knew I should've worn my slippers.
763
01:05:55,040 --> 01:06:02,430
- Uncle Vince? Uncle Vince?
- Yeah, buddy?
764
01:06:02,580 --> 01:06:05,910
- Where's Samantha?
- Um, she's sleeping with your Aunt Jennifer. She's not feeling too good.
765
01:06:07,410 --> 01:06:17,320
- She's not feeling too good. It's been a, uh, a very interesting
night, little man.
- What happened?
766
01:06:20,090 --> 01:06:26,880
- One day I'll tell you all about it, all right? Maybe when you're in college.
- I'm not going to college. Neither is Samantha.
767
01:06:27,130 --> 01:06:31,600
- Why not?
- I heard Grandpa say they're gonna use our college fund to pay
for your wedding.
768
01:06:33,110 --> 01:06:37,180
- They said that?
- Night.
769
01:06:57,300 --> 01:07:00,070
Dad. Hey.
770
01:07:02,420 --> 01:07:06,300
Vince? How the hell did you know where to find me?
771
01:07:06,500 --> 01:07:11,930
- It's where Mom always came when she needed to find you,
usually with me in tow.
- And you remember that?
772
01:07:12,960 --> 01:07:21,740
- Not much else to remember, Dad.
- Well, it's good to see you too. Can I buy you a beer or...
773
01:07:21,741 --> 01:07:27,580
- No. I just came here to take care of business.
- Oh, come on. Stick around a while, place a couple of bets.
774
01:07:27,581 --> 01:07:35,600
- I'm giving it up. It was a nasty habit. I'm gonna be breaking
the cycle, I think.
- So you're just here for the money?
775
01:07:37,560 --> 01:07:48,920
- I don't know what I'm here for. Maybe this was a mistake.
- No, Vince. Vince. Look, I know that life was tough for you, and
I'm sorry about that. I realise I'm never gonna be father of the year.
776
01:07:50,380 --> 01:08:01,200
- I would've settled for just a father.
- I hit it pretty big at the track last year. It's the big payoff I've
always been waiting for.
777
01:08:02,420 --> 01:08:10,700
- But after the excitement wore off, I realised I don't have anybody
to celebrate with.
- Guess that's what happens when this place is your home, Dad.
778
01:08:10,701 --> 01:08:17,950
- I'm trying to make amends, son. I'd like a second chance. I know
that I don't deserve one.
- You don't.
779
01:08:19,330 --> 01:08:22,110
All right. All right.
780
01:08:23,750 --> 01:08:32,370
I'm proud of you, Vince. Falling in love, getting married, creating a
family, it's...
781
01:08:33,180 --> 01:08:34,710
Hell, I envy you.
782
01:08:36,750 --> 01:08:43,590
I gambled away the love of my life and my relationship with you.
783
01:08:47,900 --> 01:08:50,520
That is my biggest regret.
784
01:08:56,320 --> 01:09:01,420
- I'm gonna find another way to get the money.
- Vince, come on. Please. Please.
785
01:09:03,260 --> 01:09:06,330
Let me do this much, all right?
786
01:09:15,000 --> 01:09:17,850
The wedding's next Saturday 2pm at Peat St Christian.
787
01:09:30,280 --> 01:09:34,430
- Say goodbye to your aunt Jen-Jen and don't forget to say
thank you.
- But where's Uncle Vince?
788
01:09:35,100 --> 01:09:39,740
Hey! Where do you think I am, buddy? Hey! Oh! What the heck,
man?
789
01:09:39,741 --> 01:09:46,770
You were going to leave without saying goodbye after all
we've been through? Come on. It's from my father.
790
01:09:53,040 --> 01:10:01,450
- Are you OK?
- I will be. Sorry, kid. Looks like you're going to be going to
college after all.
791
01:10:01,530 --> 01:10:05,760
- Come on. Let's go.
- I'm gonna miss him.
- Don't worry. He's not going anywhere.
792
01:10:11,860 --> 01:10:14,750
- The kids have only been gone a few hours, and I miss
them already.
- I know.
793
01:10:15,150 --> 01:10:19,540
- This thing's still got a leak in it.
- Listen, about what happened last night...
794
01:10:20,550 --> 01:10:25,480
- Or didn't happen last night.
- It's probably for the best.
795
01:10:28,350 --> 01:10:31,850
- Yeah.
- I mean, things could get complicated.
796
01:10:33,880 --> 01:10:40,510
I'm a simple guy. That was a softball. No
comeback there?
797
01:10:43,230 --> 01:10:44,390
Good night, Vince.
798
01:10:50,020 --> 01:10:56,650
Well, I don't think I'm going to risk the air mattress
again tonight, so I'll probably, uh, just...
799
01:10:58,800 --> 01:11:03,340
Night. See you at the rehearsal dinner.
800
01:11:17,500 --> 01:11:25,170
Um, my parents and I couldn't be happier that we have all of
you here to celebrate Vince and Jennifer's wedding tomorrow.
801
01:11:26,070 --> 01:11:30,250
It's probably safe to say that many of us never thought that
Jennifer would ever get married.
802
01:11:33,500 --> 01:11:44,370
But she has found this wonderful man who's so funny, giving
and warm. And he obviously adores her.
803
01:11:46,200 --> 01:11:52,780
I've seen the way that Vince looks at Jennifer when she's not
looking, and I can see what he must see.
804
01:11:55,980 --> 01:12:03,930
I look forward to tomorrow.....to seeing my beautiful sister
as happy as I was on my wedding day.
805
01:12:06,520 --> 01:12:14,100
But more importantly, I look forward to being a part of the
life that Jennifer and Vince make together.
806
01:12:16,090 --> 01:12:19,700
To Vince and Jennifer, may you live happily ever...
807
01:12:20,340 --> 01:12:21,360
Jen-Jen?
808
01:12:27,060 --> 01:12:28,050
Nerves.
809
01:12:41,040 --> 01:12:50,400
- Hey.
- I can't go through with it. I can't deceive all my family and
friends. I'm sorry. I just can't.
810
01:12:52,480 --> 01:12:55,440
- We have to.
- I'm calling it off.
811
01:12:57,960 --> 00:13:02,340
- No, you're not. Here.
- How can you go through with this?
812
01:13:05,860 --> 01:13:11,640
You can't do this to me, Jennifer. I could've taken that money
my father gave me and paid off my debt, but I didn't do it.
813
01:13:12,030 --> 01:13:18,440
- Why didn't you?
- I don't know. Because... because I just didn't.
814
01:13:20,990 --> 01:13:26,900
Look, I can't... I can't stand up there tomorrow and marry a
man who doesn't love me.
815
01:13:31,890 --> 01:13:38,450
- Now you tell me. It's great timing.
- Sorry. You'll have to pay your debt some other way.
816
01:13:38,660 --> 01:13:43,160
- If I thought of a way to get the money, you think I would've
gone through this?
- I'm sorry it's been so terrible.
817
01:13:47,330 --> 01:13:54,690
Why don't you go back in there, Jennifer, all right? Tell your
parents that all that money they just spent was for nothing.
818
01:13:57,190 --> 01:13:58,130
Can you do that?
819
01:13:57,190 --> 01:13:58,130
Can you do that?
820
01:14:06,880 --> 01:14:09,220
Unless you want The Monkey to kill me so you can keep
my television.
821
01:14:11,720 --> 01:14:16,190
- After the wedding, I never want to see you again. Thank God
I didn't sleep with you.
- Oh, you would've loved it.
822
01:14:16,191 --> 01:14:18,000
- Not as much as you would have.
- Mm-hm.
823
01:14:28,450 --> 01:14:32,720
- How do you tie these things, Steve?
- Why didn't you just get the clip-on?
824
01:14:33,440 --> 01:14:36,530
- I don't know. Maybe I'm getting married, man.
- Are you decent?
825
01:14:36,540 --> 01:14:42,520
- Yeah.
- Wow, you look...dashing.
- Thanks. Is she OK? She's still going to go through with this, right?
826
01:14:42,660 --> 01:14:49,380
Of course she is. She's a little uptight, but that's just the
nervous jitters. But she did ask me to give you this,
827
01:14:42,660 --> 01:14:49,380
Of course she is. She's a little uptight, but that's just the
nervous jitters. But she did ask me to give you this,
828
01:14:56,490 --> 01:15:03,030
- OK
- It's really sweet, you know, exchanging love letters right before the ceremony.
829
01:15:04,870 --> 01:15:08,220
- There you go.
- Yay, brother!
830
01:15:10,350 --> 01:15:19,050
- Oh, um... yeah, you know what? We're almost ready to go, so you might
want to tie that tie.
- Okay.
831
01:15:21,800 --> 01:15:25,240
Just think of it as a shoelace for your neck.
832
01:15:37,390 --> 01:15:41,690
- Hey.
- Hey. I'm a friend of Vic's. We met last week.
833
01:15:41,700 --> 01:15:44,650
- Vince.
- Right, Vince.
834
01:16:31,720 --> 01:16:33,140
OK. OK.
835
01:16:49,390 --> 01:16:50,860
Wait. Close the doors.
836
01:16:54,450 --> 01:16:58,180
- Honey, it's time.
- I don't think I can do this.
837
01:16:58,470 --> 01:17:02,210
- Of course you can.
- No. Vince and I...
838
01:17:02,220 --> 01:17:10,350
- Jennifer, listen to me. Your mother and I always doubted
you'd even get married...
- I know, Dad. Thanks.
839
01:17:10,440 --> 01:17:22,030
..because we never thought you'd meet anybody worthy of all
you had to offer. I couldn't be prouder of the woman you've become.
840
01:17:24,650 --> 01:17:27,110
And I'm really sorry I haven't always told you that.
841
01:17:35,160 --> 01:17:37,530
- Dad, I just need to tell you...
- Sweetheart.
842
01:17:42,430 --> 01:17:50,900
I know you're scared. And as hard as it's gonna be for me to give
you away, I know you're gonna be in good hands.
843
01:17:51,220 --> 01:17:52,230
Vince loves you.
844
01:17:59,320 --> 01:18:00,000
OK?
845
01:18:23,500 --> 01:18:26,220
- Wow.
- I know.
846
01:18:53,020 --> 01:19:01,480
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to join this man and this
woman in the sacred bonds of holy matrimony.
847
01:19:01,750 --> 01:19:10,500
I have had the chance to spend time with Jennifer and Vince, and their
unusually strong feelings for one another are, well, quite apparent.
848
01:19:11,190 --> 01:19:20,120
I've done this job long enough to know when a couple is getting married
for the wrong reasons.Some they're in love with an idealised version,
849
01:19:20,121 --> 01:19:30,350
of the person they are marrying. Others feel that they are simply too old
to be single any more. And some... Well, some just want all the gifts.
850
01:19:38,070 --> 01:19:39,140
That's ridiculous.
851
01:19:39,150 --> 01:19:49,320
But what they don't realise is that marriage is a journey. A
wonderful, exciting and, at times, excruciating journey.
852
01:19:51,260 --> 01:19:52,200
Am I right?
853
01:19:55,185 --> 01:20:05,530
But Jennifer and Vince, they see each other for who they really are.
There are no rose-coloured glasses on these two, not at all.
854
01:20:06,180 --> 01:20:11,720
They are standing here today committing to each other,
knowing full well what they're getting into.
855
01:20:13,590 --> 01:20:18,750
The couple has elected to recite their own vows. Vince?
856
01:20:19,080 --> 01:20:21,110
- Yeah?
- The vows.
857
01:20:21,280 --> 01:20:22,250
Oh, right.
858
01:20:29,110 --> 01:20:36,070
Jennifer, I didn't know how loving a person
could be until I met you.
859
01:20:42,610 --> 01:20:45,220
I can't. I just cannot do this.
860
01:20:51,500 --> 01:20:53,780
- I've got to speak from the heart here.
- Uh-uh.
861
01:20:54,190 --> 01:21:00,350
Jennifer, you are the most frustrating person
I have ever met.
862
01:21:00,830 --> 01:21:11,260
You are opinionated and stubborn, and at times, really,
really, really bossy.
863
01:21:16,060 --> 01:21:24,620
And that is why I've fallen in love with you. I didn't plan
on it, believe me. It just happened. And along the way, I...
864
01:21:26,550 --> 01:21:37,890
..noticed your generosity, your kindness, your great sense
of humour and just your basic sense of decency.
865
01:21:41,720 --> 01:21:49,170
You're an amazing woman, Jennifer. And I will be proud
to call you my wife.
866
01:21:56,300 --> 01:21:58,060
Jennifer, it's your turn now.
867
01:22:02,320 --> 01:22:03,500
Read your vows.
868
01:22:21,490 --> 01:22:22,770
It was my grandmother's.
869
01:22:27,240 --> 00:22:28,950
We're not quite to the rings yet.
870
01:22:30,200 --> 01:22:31,170
What do you say?
871
01:22:38,010 --> 01:22:49,200
You know, I pride myself on being able to read people. When I met
you, Vince, I thought you were sloppy and lazy and a ladies' man
872
01:22:50,030 --> 01:22:59,750
And I was right. In fact, that was all I could see. But every day that
I've spent with you I have found little things that I love about you,
873
01:23:01,140 --> 01:23:09,190
like the way you light up when your mom walks in a room or the
way you make my niece and nephew laugh. And ever since then,
874
01:23:09,191 --> 01:23:14,720
I just... I don't know, I just love all those little things about you.
875
01:23:18,110 --> 01:23:19,360
I love you, Vince.
876
01:23:25,940 --> 01:23:30,060
- Is that a yes?
- Yes. Yes.
877
01:23:32,470 --> 01:23:33,500
Yes.
878
01:23:35,880 --> 01:23:42,290
Guys, the kissing comes later too. We're still at the vows. Oh, um,
Vince, do you take Jennifer to be your lawful wedded wife?
879
01:23:42,291 --> 01:23:49,100
Jennifer, do you take Vince to be your lawful wedded husband?
Um, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may do that.
880
01:24:30,770 --> 01:24:33,410
- Touching ceremony.
- Thank you.
881
01:24:33,700 --> 01:24:38,420
Mr Monkey, we're gonna pay you back. If you want a down payment,
you can just take a gift off the gift table.
882
01:24:38,940 --> 01:24:44,370
- I like your style. Vince, you did well.
- I know
883
01:24:44,880 --> 01:24:46,850
Which is why I'm forgiving your debt.
884
01:24:46,900 --> 01:24:47,910
- Really?
- Really?
885
01:24:48,310 --> 01:24:57,370
Of course not. But I will knock off 75 bucks so you can get
yourself a blender. To the happy couple! Salut!
886
01:24:57,400 --> 01:25:57,370
Of course not. But I will knock off 75 bucks so you can get
yourself a blender. To the happy couple! Salut!
887
01:25:11,300 --> 01:25:16,190
- Oh, my God, we're married. We're really married.
- I know. We are so lucky.
888
01:25:17,430 --> 01:25:21,730
I still feel kind of bad about deceiving everybody. Do you
think we should tell them?
889
01:25:21,980 --> 01:25:27,670
- Now? What? Are you kidding? Your aunt just bought us that
coffee maker you wanted.
- Yeah, but it was all a lie.
890
01:25:29,000 --> 01:25:36,480
It's a lie that came true, though. I love you, honey. I mean, we
can... give back all the stuff. Nothing's gonna change that.
891
01:25:45,860 --> 01:25:46,910
I love you, Vince.
892
01:25:47,305 --> 01:25:53,247
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