Original subtitles

[theme music]

honk honk

honk

[whistles]

[siren blaring]

[whistles]

[screeching]

[screeching]

vroom

crash

[door slams]

[door slams]

Mwah!

[instrumental music]

We're getting close to the town of Bedrock, Mary Lou Jim.

Cousin Fred Flintstone's reign.

Cousin Fred will sure be surprised

to see his unspeakably rich cousins, Tumbleweed.

He sure will.

I can hardly wait to see that old sidewinder.

[laughing]

Hey, Pokey, ring this critter in.

Here's Cousin Fred's spread.

Uh, yes, sir. Very good, sir.

[tires screeching]

Well, I declare

it ain't much of a spread, Tumbleweed.

I keep tellin' you, Mary Lou Jim

everyone isn't unspeakably rich like we are.

Well, lookie there!

'Isn't that our Cousin Fred manicuring that tree?'

(Tumbleweed) 'It sure is, Mary Lou.'

That's the old horny toad coyote.

Hey, Fred, you old horse-thief, look who's here!

Cousin Tumbleweed and Cousin Mary Lou Jim!

- 'Ya-hoo-hoo!' - 'Yup! Yup! Yup! Yup! Yup!'

Yabba-dabba-doo!

Whoo-hoo! Yip-yip-yip-yip!

[laughing]

How been ya, ya old coyote?

[whooping]

Good grief. What's that? Sounds like a last round-up.

(Tumbleweed) 'Yippee! Yoo-hoo!'

Oh, my goodness! Help! Police!

My husband's being attacked!

Leave Fred alone, you brute! You're killing him!

Yip-yip-yip! Ya-hoo!

[Fred laughing]

toing

It's alright, Wilma. They're my cousins.

They're just glad to see me.

Cousins? Oh, I'm sorry.

What's all the commotion, Fred?

You being robbed or somethin'?

It's alright, Barney. These are Fred's cousins.

They're just glad to see him, he says.

Barney, I want you to meet Cousin Tumbleweed

and Cousin Mary Lou Jim.

Howdy, folks?

Any friend of my Cousin Fred

is a friend of mine.

- Pleased to me you, I'm sure. - Likewise.

And this is my darling wife, Wilma.

She's a cute little heifer, Fred.

[Tumbleweed and Fred laughing]

[chuckles] Uh, "Heifer?"

Well, now I'm hungry. Let's all go out and eat.

Wilma, honey

where's the most expensive

chuckwagon in town?

Oh, why, the Rockadero, I guess.

Then let's go. My treat!

- Yip-yip-yip! - Yip-yip-yip!

(Fred) 'Yabba-dabba-doo!'

[vehicles honking]

But, uh, I'm sorry, sir.

Uh, you and your party are not dressed properly to dine here.

What's the matter with you, sonny?

Why, I've eaten beef jerky in my bathtub dressed this way.

I don't doubt it, you, you cow person.

I demand to see the manager!

Tumbleweed won't get anywhere with the manager.

No. They're real strict about being dressed right.

Hey, here comes Cousin Tumbleweed

back with some guy.

Emil, show the new owner to the best table.

Hey, how about that? He bought the place.

Sure! He usually does!

You, dude, you're fired! We'll find our own table.

Come on, you cowpokes, let's eat.

Ya-hoo!

Mighty fine brontosaurus ribs my restaurant serves.

'Eh, Cousin Fred?'

The best, Cousin Tumbleweed, the best!

Now, folks, Mary Lou Jim and I are taking an ocean trip.

We'll probably have to buy the boat.

But for the month we'll be away

I want all of you to go out to my ranch and enjoy yourselves.

'We'd feel better if our kin folk'

'was watching over our spread while we're away.'

But-but-but, Cousin Tumbleweed, I--

I won't take no for an answer.

Else I'll cut you out of my will, Cousin Fred.

[laughing]

- But what about Fred's job? - And Barney's?

They can't take off for a month.

You just tell me what companies they work for.

Why, if I don't already own 'em, I'll buy 'em!

[laughing]

[engine revving]

So long, Cousin Tumbleweed!

Have a good time, Mary Lou Jim.

Bye, folks! Now, you get out to the ranch! You hear?

[whistles] Uh, it's a mighty big, uh, car you got there, Tumbleweed.

Big car? Huh!

Down my way, this is one of those, uh..

What do you call 'em? Uh.. Oh, yeah! Compacts.

[hooting]

I hope they have a good time.

They don't seem to have any other kind.

Well, what are we gonna do, Fred?

Do? Well, there's only one thing to do.

Let's go to the ranch. Why, we'll have a ball, eh, Barney?

Fresh air, wide open spaces, sunshine.

And besides, I can't take the chance

or Cousin Tumbleweed will leave me out of his will.

[instrumental music]

We've been travelling for four days now.

We should be getting close to the ranch.

Yeah. We'll be there in a few hours.

Hey, Fred, Fred. Oh, look at that sign up ahead.

(Fred) 'Boy, the Grand Canyon.'

That's one of nature's wonders. Let's take a look.

So that's the Grand Canyon, huh?

- That's it! - Hm.

(Wilma) Well, doesn't look like much to me.

(Fred) Not now, but they expect it to be a big thing someday.

Fred, if you see a nice, clean gas station, let's stop.

No wonder we can't make any time.

We spend all day looking for nice, clean gas stations.

Nice, clean restaurants, nice, clean motels.

After travelin' all day in this dust and dirt

a nice, clean place would lock the door

when they saw us coming.

There's a nice, clean gas station, Fred.

Okay, okay, we'll stop at the nice, clean gas station

and get some nice, clean gas.

[bell tolling]

- Fill her up, sir? - 'Yeah. Make it ethel.'

Right.

glug glug glug

Hey, bud, can we have a road map?

Sure. Here you are, mister.

Thank you.

Hey, Fred. Let's find out where we are.

(Fred) There's Cousin Tumbleweed's place

right off of Highway Six.

Oh, you know, Fred, I could always unfold these maps

but I can never get 'em folded up right again.

Yeah. Yeah, I know what you mean.

Well, girls, we know exactly where we are now.

So do I. We're exactly lost again.

Lost nothing. There's the ranch straight ahead.

Well, as Cousin Mary Lou Jim would say

"Ya-hoo!"

Quiet, you ornery horned, toad varmint.

Well, there she is, the Tumbleweed Ranch.

Looks more like a tumbledown ranch to me.

Big spread, huh, Barney?

Sure is, Fred. You oughta go on a diet.

Keep askin' for it, Barney. Keep askin'.

One of these days you'll get it.

Get what, Fred?

"Get what, Fred? Get what, Fred?"

A face full of knuckles, that's what.

Now, let's get down to the ranch and unpack.

[hooting]

(Fred) 'Yabba-dabba-doo!'

Well, it only took them ten minutes to go all out Western.

- Listen to them. - Listening to them is easy.

It's looking at them that's hard to take.

Look at me, Fred. I'm a cowboy!

You sure got the legs for it, tex.

[laughs]

(Fred) 'Hey, Wilma!'

Droop-along Flintstone is calling, Wilma.

Ten to one, it's something about food.

Hey, Wilma, why don't you rustle up some grub, honey?

Barney and I are going down to the corral

and bust a bronc or two before lunch.

I never saw it to fail.

Whenever I go any place or any so-called vacation

I always end up being home on the range.

[squeaking]

Well, partner, there they are.

Yeah, Fred. There they are, and here we are.

And I'm all for keepin' it that way.

But I told the girls we were gonna bust a bronc.

(Barney) 'I've got a deal going with those broncs.'

'They don't bust me, I don't bust them!'

What's the matter, Barney? You a chicken?

Well, uh, let's put it this way, Fred.

[imitating a chicken]

Oh, knock it off!

You're gonna bust a bronc

if it's the last thing I do!

Now, get up on this one, Barney. He's a quiet one.

Okay, Fred. I busted him. Now get me off!

He ain't busted yet. Give him the spurs.

Alright, Fred.

[squeaking]

[intense music]

No, Barney! Watch it! Watch it!

[thuds]

Gee. Thanks, Fred.

Lucky for me, you broke my fall.

You're lucky I don't break your neck.

Now get off my back!

[instrumental music]

I told you we'd bust a bronco, Barney.

We almost busted this one just by sitting on him.

So we start small and work up.

Give him the spurs, Barney. We're going too slow.

Okay, Fred. Giddyup.

toing

Hey!

Not so fast, Barney. Slow him down! Slow him down!

Yoo-hoo. Betty, lunch is ready.

- Will you call the boys? - Okay, Wilma.

ting ting ting

Come and get it!

Do something, Barney! Do something!

(Barney) 'Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!'

Pull back on the reins! Pull back on the reins!

[intense music]

Fine thing! I fix lunch for 'em, and they go off riding.

Some nerve. All they think of is having a good time.

Hey, Fred, I'm gonna..

[indistinct chatter]

We'll pull the reins!

[indistinct chatter]

[both screaming]

[thuds]

- You alright, Barney? - Yeah, Fred. How about you?

Not bad, considering we must've fell a 100 feet.

Well, we're lucky for one thing, Fred.

Yeah? What's that?

We're lucky we landed in soft water.

[laughing]

Ah-ah!

[gurgling]

Oh, soak your head!

[instrumental music]

Boy, there's more West out here than I ever thought possible.

- Hey, Fred, I've a good idea. - What's that, Barney?

I've a good idea we're lost.

I had that idea an hour ago

when we discovered we were walking in circles.

- Hey, Fred, look, hotel! - Huh? Where?

Oh, boy. What a sight for my sore eyes!

And my sore feet.

First thing I'm gonna do is

get me a double-chocolate soda.

Make mine vanilla, Fred.

[laughs]

[intense music]

There's something's spooky about this place, Barney.

- Not a soul around. - Oh.

Must be one of those old ghost towns, Fred.

Yeah, yeah. The West is full of 'em.

Let's take a look in that saloon, Barn.

If there's anybody around here, they'll be in there.

Right, Fred.

[intense music]

(Fred) 'Hello! Anybody home?'

[door creaking]

It's as empty as the rest of the town.

Sort of gives you the creeps, huh, Fred?

Uh-huh. Looks like people were here just an hour ago.

I don't know about you, Fred, but I'm bushed.

What do you say we take a rest?

I was gonna suggest the same thing, Barney.

We can take a nap on those cots in the back room

before we start hikin' again.

Sounds good to me, Fred.

[instrumental music]

Now, what's the schedule on this one, Chuck?

We gotta shoot fast, boss.

We only have the ghost town rented for three hours.

Ah, you got enough Indians for the big scene?

Yeah, and plenty of good guys.

But I'm short of couple of bad guys.

No one wants to play the bad guys.

Well, I don't blame them, you know?

I mean, the bad guys always take an awful clobbering.

We're pullin' into the ghost town now, boss.

Oh, good, good. We'll start shooting right away.

Oh, come on, fellas. You can't all be good guys.

Now, somebody's gotta wear the black hats.

- 'How about you, Pebble?' - Not me, boss.

Last time I was the bad guy, I got two teeth knocked out.

Ah, it's a shame. Alright, alright.

We'll shoot around the bad guys.

Hey, you Indians, uh, take a break

'but keep those feathers clean.'

We're gonna shoot the bar-room fight first.

Ah, some Indians, I got them from the audience

at an all-night movie.

Okay, you guys. We gotta shoot four episodes in three hours.

So give it all you got! No time for re-takes.

But, boss, they're all wearing white hats.

- They're all good guys. - I know, I know.

So the good guys have a fight. I mean, what's the difference?

So long as there's a fight.

Okay, roll 'em! Action!

[instrumental music]

[clamoring]

Hey, Barney, wake up. There's somebody here.

[clamoring]

Looks like they're having a party, Fred.

Yeah. These cowboys live hard and play hard.

Ooh!

thump thump

Let's ask 'em how to get back to the ranch.

[groaning]

Pardon me, fellas.

[clamoring]

Ah, hold it! Ah, hold it.

Now, just a minute, will you, fellas?

I wonder if you could direct me to the Tumbleweed Ranch.

bang

[thuds]

Hey, mister?

[clattering]

Excuse me, mister, uh, but my friend and I are lost, see.

And I wanna ask you..

bang

- Who are those two guys, Chuck? - Search me, boss.

Shall we shoot the scene over?

Are you out of your mind? We'll write them into the script.

Uh, take this down, Chuck.

Two strangers enter, try to break up fight

get knocked cold. Ha-ha-ha.

'We don't shoot scenes over on our low budget, you know?'

Hey, boss, you wanna hear something funny?

Those two guys finally come out of it and they're scared stiff.

They think this whole set-up is real.

They don't know we're just shooting a picture.

Ain't that a scream?

[laughing]

Say, say, that-that gives me an idea.

- Yeah, yeah, it'll work. - 'Uh, how's that, boss?'

We found our bad guys. Now get the two black hats, quick.

So you're the two bushwhackers

that tried to break up our party, eh?

- Well, you see, I-- - 'Shut up!'

I'm the sheriff in this town, and what I say goes.

- Sure, Mr. Sheriff. - Whatever you say goes.

And I say, put on those black hats.

Well, if you insist, o-okay, but-but I don't get it.

Sounds kind of screwy to me, sheriff.

Now you coyotes better vamoose

before the boys decide to have a lynching party.

Alright, but.. Huh?

[stammering] W-what do you mean?

They don't take kindly to having their fun interrupted.

And if I were you, I'd beat it!

But you'll have to get through those cowpokes.

[grunting]

Well, Barney, it's either them or us.

If we stay, we might get lynched.

Yeah, Fred. Uh, how can we explain that to the girls?

- You ready, Barney? - Ready, Fred.

Charge!

swoosh

crash

- It worked, boss! - Boy! And how!

Keep those cameras rolling.

crash

[clamoring]

You are great, fellas. Uh, now, beat it, quick.

Thanks, sheriff.

Let's get outta here, Barney

before these screwballs come to.

swoosh

Get the cameras outside, Chuck.

I told the Indians to jump those two when they got out of town.

Oh, we'll get some great chase footage.

Boss, you're a genius.

[instrumental music]

Okay, Barney. We're safe now.

[panting]

There ain't nobody around for miles.

It's a good thing, Fred. I was getting awful bushed.

What was that, Fred?

That, Barney, is an arrow used for hunting by..

[Indians ululating]

- Indians. - Indians?

[Indians ululating]

Boy, what a nifty chase!

Are you getting it all, Chester?

Yeah. The zoom lens brings it right up close.

Well, this sure burns me up.

Those two disappearing like this for hours.

Yeah, they're out somewhere having a ball

while we're sitting here looking at some cold food.

[Indians ululating]

Betty, listen. What's that?

[Indians ululating]

Sounds like some kids playing cowboys and Indians.

What kids, there isn't a human

within miles of this dusty old place.

Do you suppose it could be real Indians?

'Not a chance.'

There hasn't been a real Indian around here for years.

[Indians ululating]

- Ah! - What's wrong, Wilma?

Indians! And they're after Fred and Barney.

[intense music]

- What do we do, Wilma? - We have to try and help them.

After all, we signed up for better or worse.

And this is about as worse as it could get.

Oh, we must've lost 'em, Fred.

[panting] I-I don't hear them hollering anymore.

Good. Head for that cave, Barney.

- We'll hide out in there! - Right, Fred.

screech

[ululating]

- Any sign of them, Betty? - I don't see a soul, Wilma.

Poor Fred, he was starting to worry

about his hair falling out.

- Imagine how he feels now. - Yeah.

Knowing that those Indians could make him instant bald.

Keep looking, Betty. They've gotta be out here somewhere.

The Indians got 'em. Good, good. Are you getting this, Chester?

Uh-huh. Look at that, boss, they're tying 'em to a stake!

And now they're going into a war dance.

[ululating]

Say, they're not bad dancers, uh

considering they came through an all-night movie theater.

[instrumental music]

Do you think we'll get out of this one, Barney?

I don't think so, pal. It looks bad.

- Are you sure? - I'm sure, Fred.

Well then, here's the ten bucks

I borrowed from you two years ago.

Gee, Fred, to have you pay up makes this almost worthwhile.

[music continues]

Wilma, the Indians!

And they have our husbands tied to a stake.

Oh! Some nerve. Let's go, Wilma.

[whistles]

- Charge! - Charge!

vroom

Hey, boss, those two women in that car

are gonna spoil the shot!

Keep shooting! Ha-ha! It must be their wives.

Oh, they're getting out of the car.

They're attacking the Indians!

Wow! Oh, this is great!

The Indians are running away!

We got an adult Western going here!

screech

[ululating]

Honest, lady, we were only kiddin'!

Gee! They never told me about this in acting school.

screech

[thuds]

That's it, Chester. We got enough for ten shows.

Wrap it up! Everybody, back to Hollyrock.

Oh, come on, Wilma, be reasonable.

We walked for five miles, and we're beat.

Yeah. How about letting us ride in the car with you, huh, girls?

We told you before, there's no room in the car for those poles.

And you're not getting loose until we get back to the ranch.

(Wilma) 'For the first time today we'll know where you are.'

♪ Giddyup giddyup giddyup old paint ♪♪

- 'Yippee!' - 'Yoo-hoo-hee-hee!'

- 'Yippee-dippee-yippee!' - 'Ya-hee!'

Oh, brother! A solid month of cowboy songs.

We must've been out of our minds

letting Fred talk us into coming out here.

Maybe we could give them back to the Indians.

If the Indians hear them sing, they won't take them back.

honk honk

Yoo-hoo!

Put the pot on the fire, girls.

We're back! Ya-hoo!

Yip-yip-yip. Yay! Ya-hoo!

It's Cousin Tumblebug.

- Tumbleweed, not bug. - What's the difference?

They're back, and that means we can leave. Let's go, Wilma.

Start packing, boys. We're going home!

vroom

Wow, there they go

the ungrateful varmints!

They never even said a thank you.

I told you, Tumbleweed.

You just can't do enough for poor relations.

All that crazy talk about wild Indians.

Bah! Ain't been a Indian around here for 50 years!

boing

[ululating]

Boy! Ha-ha..

Look at that man and woman run.

They're leaving the Indians way behind.

Keep shooting, Chester! We got another good one going.

[ululating]

Well, I didn't think

Cousin Tumbleweed would ever get that mad.

How mad, Fred?

That he'd pass right by

and never even say hello.

[laughing]

[theme music]

creak

[yawning]

clink

[door shuts]

[thuds]

[door shuts]

Wilma!

[banging on door]

(Fred) Wilma!

Come on, Wilma, open this door!

Wilma!

[instrumental music]